How People Tick: A Guide to Over 50 Types of Difficult People and How to Handle Them

by Mike Leibling

This new edition of How People Tick is a practical guide to over 50 types of difficult people such as Angry People, Blamers, Impatient People, Workaholics and Gossips. Each difficult situation is described, how it happens is analysed, and then strategies to help you deal with the problem are suggested. Disruptive behaviour patterns can be addressed once and for all, instead of having to handle one-off 'difficult' events, time and time again. Absolutely invaluable to everybody, How People Tick is full of tried and tested tips for handling 'difficult' people in 'difficult' situations, based on a real understanding of their behaviour. It is an essential read if you find people bewildering or just plain difficult, and yet still want to understand them, work with them and live with them.

Genres: Self Help, Nonfiction, Business, Psychology, Reference, Leadership, Ebooks

224 pages, Kindle Edition

First published November 11, 2004

Reviews

[DC · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book seems streamlined enough to be read via Kindle App.

Notes for now:
-I like how the author mentions that it's not necessarily the person that actually ticks us off, but the reaction of that certain person to a situation.
-The format of this book: type of person - why they tick us off - how to react to such a person.
-I actually enjoyed the little snippets included here and there. They show the real life results on how reacting in a certain way can bring to your level/understanding that person who annoys you.
-This book basically tells you to try to get into a person's shoes to understand a situation better.
-Most, if not all, of the solutions seem feasible, but it, of course, depends on personal will.
-I particularly enjoyed the section on "Angry People"; now I know why they say "laugh and count to ten". Apparently, it's a physiological thing.

(Actual review to follow.)

[Ingrid Caira · Rating 5 out of 5]

I read the electronic version but wouldn't mind having a hard copy for my desk at work. Inside you will find everyone you know, including yourself. He tells you who the person is, why they think the way they do, why that bugs you so much, and how to deal with it. This book is chock full of practical how-to stuff and insight. This is more than the Pscyh 101 that you might expect here, while still concise and easy to read. I'll go back to this one again.

[Indah Threez Lestari · Rating 3 out of 5]

1st - 2011

Beli tahun 2007, mulai baca tahun 2010, selesai baca tahun 2011. Salah satu buku terlantar...

Sadar diri bahwa saya memiliki sebagian dari 50 tipe orang sulit (baca: mengesalkan) yang ada di buku, mungkin buku ini perlu direkomendasikan pada pihak-pihak yang kesal pada saya... :)

01-01-2011

[Ajay · Rating 4 out of 5]

A decent reference book to keep on the shelf which describes over 50 (51 to be precise!) types of people, their personalities and how to handle them. Admittedly it's geared mainly towards the workplace but can be applied to pretty much any situation.

[Laila · Rating 3 out of 5]

50 Types of Difficult People !!!!
well !!! that was interesting !! helpful as well !!
it made so much sense .
" it's not necessarily the person that actually ticks us off, but the reaction of that certain person to a situation "

[Spring Lam · Rating 3 out of 5]

Was ok.

Was written a bit too casually for my taste. Could have been better formatted and sophisticated in the tone and language.

[Antti Ensaro · Rating 1 out of 5]

Overly simplistic and no actual actionable steps except common-sense feel-good thoughts for the person reading it. Nothing worthy to actually enact and effect change.

[ukuklele · Rating 3 out of 5]

Buku ini seperti mengajak untuk belajar berempati. Ada 45 tipe orang sulit yang tiap-tiapnya dijabarkan dengan pola: memahami orang yang dibikin sulit, memahami orang yang membikin sulit, sebelum memberikan saran-saran tindakan.

Dalam memahami, adakalanya kita mesti menerima bahwa seseorang memang dilahirkan demikian atau perilakunya itu dipengaruhi oleh caranya dibesarkan. Contohnya sebagai berikut.

Tipe 36, Orang yang suka pamer:

Harapan akan perhatian ini disebabkan oleh banyak hal, misalnya orang tua memberi tahu mereka bahwa mereka harus selalu berjuang untuk mendapatkan tepuk tangan, atau bahwa mereka harus selalu mengisi kekosongan, atau mereka tidak akan menonjol dan penting jika mereka tidak diperhatikan. (halaman 137)

Tipe 39, Orang yang tidak antusias:

Jika Anda diberkahi dengan visi yang jelas dan penuh motivasi, ingatlah bahwa "perusak semangat" dilahirkan seperti itu! Mereka tidak sengaja "sedih" atau "negatif"; mereka mungkin hanya tidak bersemangat untuk dapat melihat gambar yang terang, menggembirakan, sehingga mereka menjadi bosan dan tidak antusias. Cobalah untuk menerima insting alami mereka untuk melihat bahwa Anda mungkin berbuat kesalahan, sebelum Anda bertindak. Gunakan bakat alami mereka dan tanyakan, "Jadi, rintangan apa yang telah terlewatkan oleh pengamatan saya? Apa lagi yang mungkin salah?" (halaman 150-151)

Aneka situasi yang dicontohkan dalam buku ini umumnya menyangkut dunia kerja. Walau begitu, tipe-tipe orang sulit tersebut mungkin saja kita temukan dalam dunia yang lebih luas--pergaulan sehari-hari, seperti komunitas, rumah, sekolah, dan sebagainya--bahkan dalam diri kita sendiri. Karena itu, tipsnya bisa saja disesuaikan dengan keadaan spesifik masing-masing pembaca.

Walaupun buku ini bagus dan menarik, saya sulit bertahan membacanya. Akhirnya saya bisa menamatkan buku ini dengan memecah-mecah jam baca. Pembacaan buku ini tidak mengalir mungkin karena bentuknya yang seperti katalog, terjemahannya yang saya rasakan kurang masuk, serta kurangnya pengalaman sehingga saya tidak selalu bisa membayangkan setiap contoh situasi.

[Saarah Niña · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book can save you heaps of time thinking about what to do about a colleague who refuses to pull his weight, a boss who is infuriatingly indecisive or even too agreeable. We've all complained in one way or another, I expect, only to find contradicting pieces of advice. And I expect quite a lot of us have felt that somehow the world of work, and the people inhabiting it, are mysterious and tricky. Work relationships are difficult to build but even more so to maintain. You may have work in common but perhaps little else and work itself may be stirring more trouble.

Mike Liebling, the author, advises his readers how to get on the other person's level: empathise but also achieve significant results quite easily. It's a practical book, and even though it can be a little tiresome of a book after a while, Liebling offers a fair share of humourous anecdotes that spark some fun into the pages. I would say, as it hasn't been strictly mentioned, that this book's focus is primarily on careers and business relationships though it may prove equally helpful with more social relationships. Liebling advises his readers on how to start challenging conversations, what words to say and what to hope for-everything from the smallest of details to the bigger picture.

I can't say I'm a fan of the title, 'handling people' sounds unnecessarily mean. Sinister too. And I think we're all difficult people - in our own ways! I certainly do wonder what persuaded Liebling to stop at 51 (types of difficult people.) But aside from all that, this is a useful book. Immensely useful as we're only becoming more connected with individuals with our latest technology and gadgets so it's mighty necessary to have a tool that can help us ensure we're all on the same page. Or at least, close to it.

[AJW · Rating 2 out of 5]

Firstly let me explain my star rating. It’s a very personal score and often not an objective assessment of the book.

This is actually quite a useful book for busy managers. It gives an alphabetical list of 51 different types of people, or more accurately work colleagues, and some tips on how to handle them. Much of the advice is sound. You can quickly dip into the relevant chapter(s) and come away with a strategy.

I personally didn’t get much value from this book. I like to have more depth and psychological reasoning/research. The book was a little repetitive when read through. This won’t be so much of an issue if you just dip into it.

[TMK · Rating 1 out of 5]

++ To anybody, you must show that you understand them: what they meant and how they feel. Then explain to them that even so, you have to oppose them.
Angry People:
- Not to be ignored: or they will increase their signal
- Be noticed. Not staring; but calm.
+ Respond to them; avoid hostility.
Bigot:
- Invite them to think a little below the surface by asking, very gently, ‘Because…?’;
+ Make them see their own bias (indirectly) by questioning
Bully:
+ Ignore only make they bully you even more
+ Fight them - must threaten to hurt them badly
Disrespectful people: Don’t take it personally

[Vera Lentini · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book helped me though some tough times early in my corporate career… keeping it around as a reference although some of the psychology/neurobiology references seem a bit outdated 10 years later. Really like the practical recommendations of what to do and what to say to achieve a result in an interaction for example saying to an angry person “you’re right” can diffuse the situation quite quickly. Great concept and glad this book exists, even if it could use a bit of updating here and there.

[Lolo · Rating 2 out of 5]

A nice concept for a book. Unfortunately it doesn't explain "How" these difficult "people tick". It's interesting to read which are those 50 difficult types, and read how to handle them, but I find that most of the suggestions are superficial.

[Mirela · Rating 1 out of 5]

Superficial, with irrelevant and uninteresting "story" cases, but above all with unhelpful and misleading advice such as thanking your bully and imagining invisible glass shields while being bullied. Absolute rubbish.

[Nataliia L. · Rating 3 out of 5]

It's an easy practical guide that focuses on, well, difficult people predominantly from a managerial perspective. Some key takeaways for me: separate skills and identity, the what and the how, and past and future.

[A PEARSON · Rating 4 out of 5]

Not a huge fan of the list format but this one is done quite well. Some very interesting insight into human emotion and how to manage different states. 4/5

[Alex Pavlov · Rating 2 out of 5]

Shit book. Waste of time

[Ruth · Rating 2 out of 5]

c2005: Certainly covered a few of the personality types that I have come across both during work and play. Slightly repetitive and a lot of personal anecdotes - some of which are quite funny. Some urban legends appear to have been incorporated as fact as well and by that I mean that a story I had read way back in the nineties was experienced by one of the author's colleagues. The best bit - linking the personalities to star signs. Sadly, I have used this in the past when filtering job applications. Who knew other people did this as well?!Recommended to those of the normal crew that enjoy succinct self-help books.

[Elaine · Rating 2 out of 5]

Every once in a while I am pulled in by a self-help book. I tend to think of it as yet another attempt at cutting carbs from my diet, but a little easier to tackle. After all, any paperback that promises to give you the secret to dealing with 50 difficult people is worth the investment, right?

Wrong.

If people could be reduced to a checklist there would be no novels. No movies. No soaring adventures on screen, no mini-series, no evil dark lords. No divorces, no bad relationships.

I skimmed it quickly, and just as quickly put it aside to go look for Wheat Thins.

[Rebecka · Rating 3 out of 5]

This book is geared to helping you deal with difficult co-corkers more than anything. It offers some useful tips and I like the little stories he uses the illustrate the different types of behavior. I appreciate that he recommends separating 'people' from 'behaviors' since it's so natural to label someone as their behavior: difficult, negative, self-centered, when sometimes it's only during certain times that act like that.

[JH · Rating 3 out of 5]

Contains some simple tips on how to tackle difficult people. A helpful read, though it has its issues:
* A few of the types of difficult people are usually found in the same person, and you can see that by how the tips have high overlap in the advice they give.
* Some of the types of difficult people are very narrowly defined - for e.g. I would hardly call blamers as people who are afraid of taking responsibility.

[hissi · Rating 4 out of 5]

"what i like about the book is that it describe most troublesome people we meet through life and i like it alot the thing is though that some solutions wont work, talking to bullies for example? or when someone compliments us we should specify.. stuff like that mad the book lose a star,

[Rosemary Daly · Rating 2 out of 5]

This book looks at 50 different "difficult" personality types and provides suggestions on how best to deal with them. The suggestions are useful, but the personality descriptions seemed shallow. It was ok.

[Shawn · Rating 5 out of 5]

The power of understanding in this book is outstanding. It is a difficult rephrasing of how ones behavior reflects true attitude. We will not only learn about what makes others react and respond the way they do, but what makes us tick as well.
A must read for everyone looking for growth.

[Sarenna · Rating 2 out of 5]

I kind of skimmed through this book. It was definitely geared for the workplace, not what I was expecting, I guess.

[Chrissi Gesme · Rating 2 out of 5]

it's a good reference book but very basic

[Angie · Rating 2 out of 5]

I liked the " tips "

[Moustapha Mahmoud · Rating 2 out of 5]

Straight to the point with smart examples.

[Natalía Papadopoúlou · Rating 3 out of 5]

I read the e-book version of this but I feel it would have been more useful to have it as a hard copy and check every now and then according to the person that I’m interacting with. I could relate with a lot of the people categorization and I was doing a lot of the tips already. I now wonder if that could have been a workbook to note down your own observations, or a completely different book with sections to understand if you are one of the people described. But that’s my imagination speaking :) This book has 50 traits of personalities clustered up, all negative, that makes us uncomfortable, and has tips on how could those be dealt of!