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Ross O'Carroll-Kelly #12
The Shelbourne Ultimatum
After his brush with death Ross O'Carroll-Kelly - schools rugby legend, award-winning author and lover of the ladeez - is back with a renewed lust for life - all thrillingly revealed in The Shelbourne Ultimatum
Ross wakes up from his coma to find a country that has changed beyond recognition. Shrewsbury Road has become a ghost estate. Marks and Spencer are selling microwavable coddle. And a Euro discount store is about to open in the Powerscourt Townhouse Centre. And he was only unconscious for ten days.
But never mind all that. The main thing is that whoever tried to kill him missed all his vital organs. All his vital organs. And having had such a lucky escape Ross vows not to waste another minute of his life. There are thousands of women out there and just one Ross to go around. He needs to focus.
Of course, life gets in the way. He has a daughter who hates him, a son who is growing up way too fast and a soon-to-be-ex wife who is resorting to increasingly desperate measures to stop the bank from repossessing the house. Oh, and the Gords - get this! - think he's lying to them.
Lying? Ross?
'Ross's misadventures and on-the-nose observations never fail to provoke a laugh-out- loud reaction ... bursting at the seams with spot-on parody' Irish Times
'Will leave you with pains in your cheeks from laughing' RTÉ Guide
The Shelbourne Ultimatum is the twelfth novel in Paul Howard's 'Ross O'Carroll- Kelly' series. Ross books have sold half a million copies, are annually nominated for the Popular Fiction prize at the Irish Book Awards - where they have twice won the prize - and are also critically acclaimed as satirical masterpieces. Titles include The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Nightdress, Should have Got off at Sydney Parade, This Champagne Mojito is the Last Thing I Own, Rhino What You Did Last Summer, NAMA Mia! and The Oh My God Delusion. The last of these was chosen as Ireland's favourite book in Eason's 125th birthday poll.
Ross wakes up from his coma to find a country that has changed beyond recognition. Shrewsbury Road has become a ghost estate. Marks and Spencer are selling microwavable coddle. And a Euro discount store is about to open in the Powerscourt Townhouse Centre. And he was only unconscious for ten days.
But never mind all that. The main thing is that whoever tried to kill him missed all his vital organs. All his vital organs. And having had such a lucky escape Ross vows not to waste another minute of his life. There are thousands of women out there and just one Ross to go around. He needs to focus.
Of course, life gets in the way. He has a daughter who hates him, a son who is growing up way too fast and a soon-to-be-ex wife who is resorting to increasingly desperate measures to stop the bank from repossessing the house. Oh, and the Gords - get this! - think he's lying to them.
Lying? Ross?
'Ross's misadventures and on-the-nose observations never fail to provoke a laugh-out- loud reaction ... bursting at the seams with spot-on parody' Irish Times
'Will leave you with pains in your cheeks from laughing' RTÉ Guide
The Shelbourne Ultimatum is the twelfth novel in Paul Howard's 'Ross O'Carroll- Kelly' series. Ross books have sold half a million copies, are annually nominated for the Popular Fiction prize at the Irish Book Awards - where they have twice won the prize - and are also critically acclaimed as satirical masterpieces. Titles include The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Nightdress, Should have Got off at Sydney Parade, This Champagne Mojito is the Last Thing I Own, Rhino What You Did Last Summer, NAMA Mia! and The Oh My God Delusion. The last of these was chosen as Ireland's favourite book in Eason's 125th birthday poll.
414 pages, Paperback
First published September 1, 2012
20 people are currently reading
138 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 17 of 17 reviews
February 21, 2019
4.5 stars, this is easily the best book in the series in quite a while. Whisper it quietly but Ross is showing signs of growing up, a lot of attempts to do the right thing which because it's Ross turn out a complete disaster. Where he gets to meet his grandmother Aida the scenes are quite touching. Roll on the next book.
October 23, 2012
More of the same. Amusing with the odd "snort so loud you wake the kids" moment...
October 12, 2018
Very funny
Another very funny read. Ross O Carroll-Kelly at his very best yet again. Can't wait to read next one soon
Another very funny read. Ross O Carroll-Kelly at his very best yet again. Can't wait to read next one soon
April 1, 2019
Definitely brought me back home and made me laugh at the D4 of it all.
Great and easy read. Will definitely be reading more from Ross.
Great and easy read. Will definitely be reading more from Ross.
February 17, 2025
Hilarious and crazy. I found myself laughing out loud several times while reading this book on a train and thoroughly enjoyed its weird and whacky storyline.
October 6, 2025
Soooo funny
July 9, 2015
This is a scream to read. THE most entertaining comment on contemporary Ireland, through the eyes of often unspeakable D4 prototype Ross O'Carroll-Kelly. Careful though. If you don't know what "D4" actually means, this book is not for you. Anybody who hasn't lived in Ireland, preferably Dublin, for a good couple of years will be more often than not lost as this is as inside-Ireland as it gets. The different accents that have been so well portrayed, also made this for a not-too-easy read, as I am not a native English speaker.
October 17, 2012
I thought this book was so funny, What i really love about it is that asides from rosses serious stupidity he is actually turning into his father!The way he talks to Honor (who is the antichrist and a great character) and Ronan is exactly the same as his dad talks to him,i love Paul Howards subtle character development.
But like i always say at the end of every book, I wish Ross would grow up a little bit:-D
But like i always say at the end of every book, I wish Ross would grow up a little bit:-D
August 22, 2014
Another fantastic Ross adventure. I really enjoyed this book and felt there was actually a lot more heart in it than in others. You really rooted for Ross as opposed to some of the previous books where he comes across as spoiled and arrogant. Highly recommended!
October 27, 2012
Hilarious!
November 10, 2012
Just so funny! Would put you in good form.
March 22, 2013
I've been in love with Ross for many years. This episode is particularly funny and the intrigue will keep you on your toes. The movie within the book alone I'd priceless.
September 18, 2013
Loved this chapter in Ross's life. Laugh out loud funny, but some real heartwarming moments too! Look forward to Downturn Abbey :)
July 3, 2013
love rosser!
November 28, 2013
Really brilliant again! Loved this book. A thoroughly enjoyable read and this series just keeps getting better and better!
June 25, 2014
Funny. Good inside view on people and problems in Ireland
October 28, 2017
The funniest one yet
Displaying 1 - 17 of 17 reviews