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497 pages, Kindle Edition
First published January 1, 2012
He was too close to Domitian. He saw the mistakes as they were being made. For a loyal, hard-working state servant it was too depressing to watch a man twenty years his junior wrecking all that Rutilius and his generation had attempted to build and stabilize after the nightmare of Nero. By sixty,you were losing enough friends and colleagues to illness, without watching more sent to their deaths prematurely.
"Don't abuse your office, I rely on you to be fair."
"Fair?"
"Your decency was the first thing that struck me when you worked with the vigiles. Vinius, I want to believe in you. There have to be good men, when everyone swims in a sewer of treachery."
Gaius listened, looking unemotional.
"I wish you were back there," Lucilla told him in a morose voice. "You made your own choices. You were aware of human failings, yet you stood for enlightenment. You were honest. You were even kindly."
"Within reason."
"I would take your reason over Domitian's fake benevolence any day. Don't lose your humanity."
"You think I changed?"
"Dacia changed you."
"You changed me."
"Do not blame me. Working for the Emperor is your own choice."
Gaius thought Lucilla's assessment was right. Society had upped and gone topsy turvy. While Domitian pretended to nurture correct behavior, he undermined it. Everyone now behaved like shits. As the despot supposedly reinforced Rome's moral system, he was destroying it. He, Vinius Clodianus, was helping. He was an instrument of the police state. He had taken the oath. He accepted the not inconsiderable money. He followed orders.
As in all courts full of terror, shameless fawning occurred. In the glistening halls on the Palatine, Domitian basked in flattery. People bowed; visitors flung themselves into inappropriate acts of obeisance; there was vile foot-kissing. The careful myth promulgated by Emperor Augustus, that Rome's leader should be a normal man living modestly, merely the "first among equals", had always been a sham; it was now completely cast away.