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76 pages, Unknown Binding
First published January 1, 1971
Waiting for nothing but music and allowing the pain—the pain that vibrates in forms too beautiful and treacherous—to reach down into the depths.Much of Pizarnik’s poetry, presented often as prose poems or chunky three-line poems that celebrates the harmony of speaking out with our voice, be in language or music, to find the common human traits in all of us. It is a cry for love, for understanding, but most of all a cry to say ‘despite it all, I am here.’¹ Even if not to others, but to oneself to remember that we live, we breath, we feel, and how wonderful it is how doing so manages to shine through the crust of our daily sadness and suffering. ‘I cannot speak with my voice, so I speak with my voices,’ she writes, using the voices of language and poetry to blot out fear and silence.
At the height of happiness, I have spoken of a music never heard before. So what? If only I could live in a continual state of ecstasy, shaping the body of the poem with my own, rescuing every phrase with my days and weeks, imbuing the poem with my breath while feeding the letters of its every word into the offering in this ceremony of living.Her words are simply exquisite, a fine wine to get gloriously drunk upon. ‘The light of language covers me like music,’ she prays like a sinner seeking the forgiveness of an Almighty, ‘like a picture ripped to shreds by the dogs of grief.’ Language is an escape route, but it is also a shield. While Pizarnik is empowered by words to punch through the grime of reality (‘I write to ward off fear and the clawing wind that lodges in my throat’), she also feels self-conscious and meek about it with language as the wool blanket a child hides beneath in fear of the formless monsters taking shape in the threatening blackness of bedtime.
i’m going to hide behind languageSilence—’silence is fire’—and fear are major motifs that she builds ramparts from music and poetry to keep from overrunning her existence. ‘Just when I’d hoped to give up hoping, your fall takes place within me,’ she says of the light of language. The power to create can be a lifeblood that get’s us through our darkest hours. What a cause for celebration.
Why
I’m afraid