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زندگی عاقلانه
A new guide to rational living, Albert Ellis
عنوان: زندگی عاقلانه؛ نویسنده: آلبرت الیس؛ مترجم: مهرداد فیروزبخت؛ تهران، رشد، 1377، در 290 ص؛ شابک: 9646115497؛ چاپ ششم: 1388؛ موضوع: رفتار درمانی قرن 20 م
عنوان: زندگی عاقلانه؛ نویسنده: آلبرت الیس؛ مترجم: مهرداد فیروزبخت؛ تهران، رشد، 1377، در 290 ص؛ شابک: 9646115497؛ چاپ ششم: 1388؛ موضوع: رفتار درمانی قرن 20 م
290 pages, Paperback
Published January 1, 1998
65 people are currently reading
610 people want to read
About the author
Albert Ellis
252 books450 followersAlbert Ellis was an American psychologist who in 1955 developed Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy (REBT). He held M.A. and Ph.D. degrees in clinical psychology from Columbia University and American Board of Professional Psychology (ABPP). He also founded and was the President of the New York City-based Albert Ellis Institute for decades.
He is generally considered to be one of the originators of the cognitive revolutionary paradigm shift in psychotherapy and the founder of cognitive-behavioral therapies. Based on a 1982 professional survey of USA and Canadian psychologists, he was considered as the second most influential psychotherapist in history (Carl Rogers ranked first in the survey; Sigmund Freud was ranked third).
He is generally considered to be one of the originators of the cognitive revolutionary paradigm shift in psychotherapy and the founder of cognitive-behavioral therapies. Based on a 1982 professional survey of USA and Canadian psychologists, he was considered as the second most influential psychotherapist in history (Carl Rogers ranked first in the survey; Sigmund Freud was ranked third).
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 43 reviews
April 28, 2023
Catalogat ca un manual de self-help, „A Guide to...” este, cu siguranță, mai mult decît un simplu rețetar de formule magice, după modelul „5 pași simpli pentru a ieși dintr-o depresie” etc.
Aș nota cîteva idei folositoare pînă și celui mai sănătos dintre nevrotici.
(i) Ideile lui Ellis (o spune singur) provin din gîndirea lui Epictet (a stoicilor, în general): „Ceea ce ne face rău nu e realitatea, nu sînt ceilalți oameni, ci opiniile noastre despre realitate și ceilalți oameni”.
(ii) Autoanaliza este posibilă, ea trebuie (sic!) să însoțească terapia și să o continue.
(iii) Suferim pentru că nu gîndim rațional. Gîndim excesiv. De pildă, folosim abuziv termenul „trebuie” („Trebuie să primesc neapărat premiul pentru eseu al revistei `Constelațiuni literare tulcene`”, „Trebuie să devin cel mai ilustru dintre eseiștii de pe malul stîng al Bahluiului”), generalizăm nepermis („Nimeni nu mă iubește și nu mă apreciază”), etichetăm etc. Terapia rațional-emotivă (RET) constă în corijarea meticuloasă a acestei gîndiri. Postulatele iraționale se cuvin înlocuite cu ceva mai util. Și mai blînd. Corijarea cere timp, răbdare, franchețe. Îndeosebi franchețe. E bine să ne împăcăm cu trecutul și, mai ales, cu prezentul. E bine să ne asumăm greșelile. E bine să nu exagerăm...
(iv) Orice terapie și orice autoanaliză începe cu adevărat abia prin recunoașterea faptului că ai o problemă și prin formularea corectă și limpede a acestei probleme. Poți recunoaște că ai o problemă nerezolvată (simptomele ți-o semnalează), dar poți greși grav în identificarea ei. Poți da vina pe trecut, pe ceilalți, pe părinți, pe influența unui destin nemilos.
(v) Cea mai nocivă dintre toate credințele este relația nevrotică dintre aprobarea / afecțiunea celorlalți și imaginea de sine: „Dacă nu mă iubesc toți, sînt un rebut, un loser. Fac degeaba umbră pămîntului. Viața mea este un eșec rușinos. Sînt un zero barat”. În realitate, mulți oameni trăiesc în solitudine și nu au nevoie de afecțiunea nimănui pentru a se simți minunat (a se vedea pp.88-89).
Atîția oameni suferă în jurul meu de la nimicuri, încît adeseori îmi vine să-i cert: „Cum poți gîndi așa?”. Dar asta n-ar fi cîtuși de puțin o atitudine amicală. Și nici terapeutică.
Există și circulă printre fani o traducere românească absolut înfiorătoare, fără nici o legătură cu textul englez. E bine s-o ocoliți.
Aș nota cîteva idei folositoare pînă și celui mai sănătos dintre nevrotici.
(i) Ideile lui Ellis (o spune singur) provin din gîndirea lui Epictet (a stoicilor, în general): „Ceea ce ne face rău nu e realitatea, nu sînt ceilalți oameni, ci opiniile noastre despre realitate și ceilalți oameni”.
(ii) Autoanaliza este posibilă, ea trebuie (sic!) să însoțească terapia și să o continue.
(iii) Suferim pentru că nu gîndim rațional. Gîndim excesiv. De pildă, folosim abuziv termenul „trebuie” („Trebuie să primesc neapărat premiul pentru eseu al revistei `Constelațiuni literare tulcene`”, „Trebuie să devin cel mai ilustru dintre eseiștii de pe malul stîng al Bahluiului”), generalizăm nepermis („Nimeni nu mă iubește și nu mă apreciază”), etichetăm etc. Terapia rațional-emotivă (RET) constă în corijarea meticuloasă a acestei gîndiri. Postulatele iraționale se cuvin înlocuite cu ceva mai util. Și mai blînd. Corijarea cere timp, răbdare, franchețe. Îndeosebi franchețe. E bine să ne împăcăm cu trecutul și, mai ales, cu prezentul. E bine să ne asumăm greșelile. E bine să nu exagerăm...
(iv) Orice terapie și orice autoanaliză începe cu adevărat abia prin recunoașterea faptului că ai o problemă și prin formularea corectă și limpede a acestei probleme. Poți recunoaște că ai o problemă nerezolvată (simptomele ți-o semnalează), dar poți greși grav în identificarea ei. Poți da vina pe trecut, pe ceilalți, pe părinți, pe influența unui destin nemilos.
(v) Cea mai nocivă dintre toate credințele este relația nevrotică dintre aprobarea / afecțiunea celorlalți și imaginea de sine: „Dacă nu mă iubesc toți, sînt un rebut, un loser. Fac degeaba umbră pămîntului. Viața mea este un eșec rușinos. Sînt un zero barat”. În realitate, mulți oameni trăiesc în solitudine și nu au nevoie de afecțiunea nimănui pentru a se simți minunat (a se vedea pp.88-89).
Atîția oameni suferă în jurul meu de la nimicuri, încît adeseori îmi vine să-i cert: „Cum poți gîndi așa?”. Dar asta n-ar fi cîtuși de puțin o atitudine amicală. Și nici terapeutică.
Există și circulă printre fani o traducere românească absolut înfiorătoare, fără nici o legătură cu textul englez. E bine s-o ocoliți.
December 24, 2016
برای من خیلی راهگشا بود؛ چون چیزایی رو مطرح کرده که مدت ها رو مغزم رژه میرفت. فقط حس کردم این اواخر کتاب دیگه داره یه حالتِ این میشه که اگه هر چی تو زندگی ـت از دست دادی و هر اتفاقی افتاد، به چپت بگیر و ادامه بده و لذت ببر و فلان. گرچه میگفت ما منکر ناراحتی و غصه خوردن نمیشیم. ولی نه اینکه آدم غرقش بشه و افسردگی بگیره و اینا. ولی حس کردم خیلی روی این لذت گرایی مانور داده. من شاید اشتباه متوجه شدم. ولی بدم نمیاد بازم بخونمش؛ چون ازون کتاباییه که باید برگردی بخونی بعضی جاهاشو و با خودت مرورشون کنی.
خوبی ـش این بود که خیلی از چیزایی که مطرح میکرد، چیزایی بود که تو ذهنم میچرخید و خودمم باهاش درگیر بودم و به بعضی راهکارهاش رسیده بودم. برای همین اینطوری نبود برام که موضع بگیرم و حس کنم یارو چون خودش روانشناسه، بلده این حرفا رو بزنه و ما نمیتونیم همینجوری راحت با مشکلاتمون کنار بیایم. اینکه آدم بتونه در هر شرایطی روحیه شو حفظ کنه و شاد باقی بمونه. به نظرم شادی تنها چیزی هست که آدم میتونه بخاطرش حس کنه خوشبخت ـه و برنده ـست. چون با خودش سلامتی و موفقیت و چیزای دیگه هم میاره.
شاد باشید. :)
خوبی ـش این بود که خیلی از چیزایی که مطرح میکرد، چیزایی بود که تو ذهنم میچرخید و خودمم باهاش درگیر بودم و به بعضی راهکارهاش رسیده بودم. برای همین اینطوری نبود برام که موضع بگیرم و حس کنم یارو چون خودش روانشناسه، بلده این حرفا رو بزنه و ما نمیتونیم همینجوری راحت با مشکلاتمون کنار بیایم. اینکه آدم بتونه در هر شرایطی روحیه شو حفظ کنه و شاد باقی بمونه. به نظرم شادی تنها چیزی هست که آدم میتونه بخاطرش حس کنه خوشبخت ـه و برنده ـست. چون با خودش سلامتی و موفقیت و چیزای دیگه هم میاره.
شاد باشید. :)
August 8, 2017
این کتاب رو به عنوان کتاب مکمل روان درمانی توی دوره ای خوندم که پیش روانشناس می رفتم. توی یکی از بحرانی ترین شرایط زندگیم کمکم کرد و بهم فهموند که چه باورهای غلط و درستی توی ذهنم ساختم. به علاوه اینکه اول کتاب مقدمه ای بود که بهم یاد داد به روانشناسم وابسته نشم و خودم حل مسئله رو یاد بگیرم. در کل کتاب خیلی خیلی مفیدی بود که به نظرم هر کسی این کتاب یا کتاب مشابهش رو برای شناخت بیشتر خودش باید بخونه.
این از اون کتاب هاییه که توی دسته کتاب های خودکاوی قرار می گیره و برای قدم زدن توی دنیای درون مناسبه.
این از اون کتاب هاییه که توی دسته کتاب های خودکاوی قرار می گیره و برای قدم زدن توی دنیای درون مناسبه.
March 4, 2018
This review is for the 3rd and last edition of this book. The 3rd edition was published in 1975 under the title "A Guide To Rational Living" rather than the title for an earlier edition titled "A New Guide To Rational Living". The 3rd edition has the edition of important content. The 3rd addition has 23 chapters.
This book is the first book the great psychologist Albert Ellis wrote on Rational Emotive Behavioral Therapy ( REBT - later known as "cognitive therapy"). I also think it is one of the best.
REBT is built on the idea that our thoughts cause our emotions and influence our behaviors. Ellis believed that people can change their emotions as well as their behaviors by disputing their irrational thoughts with facts and reason.
In this book he goes through what he believes are the top 10 irrational ideas that cause most people to experience unpleasant emotions needlessly.
Ellis is not known for being a great writer, but in this book he pulls it together. The tone is direct as well as clear, free of psychobabble, and you never doubt that you are being addressed by one of the great psychological minds of the 20th century.
Dr. Ellis views evolved substantially over the decades and many editions of this book. To get a modern view of the concepts that Dr. Ellis considered to be the most important I would recommend starting the book at chapter 20, going to the end and then starting from the beginning.
This book is the first book the great psychologist Albert Ellis wrote on Rational Emotive Behavioral Therapy ( REBT - later known as "cognitive therapy"). I also think it is one of the best.
REBT is built on the idea that our thoughts cause our emotions and influence our behaviors. Ellis believed that people can change their emotions as well as their behaviors by disputing their irrational thoughts with facts and reason.
In this book he goes through what he believes are the top 10 irrational ideas that cause most people to experience unpleasant emotions needlessly.
Ellis is not known for being a great writer, but in this book he pulls it together. The tone is direct as well as clear, free of psychobabble, and you never doubt that you are being addressed by one of the great psychological minds of the 20th century.
Dr. Ellis views evolved substantially over the decades and many editions of this book. To get a modern view of the concepts that Dr. Ellis considered to be the most important I would recommend starting the book at chapter 20, going to the end and then starting from the beginning.
December 7, 2016
A person who has delusional, self destructive thoughts should think rationally to resolve his emotional issues.
Is this not a chicken and egg problem? The person was having trouble thinking rationally and I believe therefore he visited the therapist, now the therapist says, in order to resolve your problem think rationally.
It's like a person with weight issue going to the gym and instructor says, "You know what, in order to be thin, you will have to lose fat."
Yes, yes, but how.
This how is never fully answered in the book.
So, it didn't work for me.
Is this not a chicken and egg problem? The person was having trouble thinking rationally and I believe therefore he visited the therapist, now the therapist says, in order to resolve your problem think rationally.
It's like a person with weight issue going to the gym and instructor says, "You know what, in order to be thin, you will have to lose fat."
Yes, yes, but how.
This how is never fully answered in the book.
So, it didn't work for me.
February 8, 2018
Ellis' and Harper's classic book about the connection between thoughts and emotions - you got to credit those two professors of psychology for not serving their readers any "love yourself" or "attain enduring happiness" BS, because they chose to kick people's butts instead. I wouldn't claim that it's particularly well written, but it makes compelling arguments (which is clearly the main point here) that still prove to be highly influential in the scientific field.
February 6, 2025
I don’t know about you, but trying to change your life or deal with challenging events can be difficult. And there are so many self-help guides on the shelves of bookstores that it is often hard to know where to begin. And once you start reading them, you discover that there are a lot of ideas repeated, some of them with little evidence to support them, and they often seem to have ideals and expectations that are almost impossible to achieve.
Back in 1961, Albert Ellis published a book called A Guide to Rational Living that has stood the test of time, selling over a million copies and still selling today. Ellis called his therapy Rational Emotive Therapy (RET) which, at the time, was groundbreaking and challenged the common Freudian approach to psychotherapy.
The central idea of the book is that our emotions are the product of our thoughts, ideas, beliefs, and values rather than stuff coming out of our unconscious. If that was the case, we didn’t need to get upset or anxious or emotional about our circumstances or things happening to us if we changed our thinking about them. We can have control over our emotions and reactions to things. This idea is the foundational idea of the book. The book provides guidance on how to think more rationally about our emotions and encourages us to challenge our beliefs, values, ideas, etc and evaluate them to make sure they are reasonable. If our believe and values—the assumptions we make about things—are not realistic, true, or appropriate, then our emotions will cause us to experience some sort of emotional pain.
Ellis’s writing style is very straightforward, clear, and no-nonsense. I guess you could say it’s a no-bullshit approach. At one point he says that, ‘The best years of your life are the ones in which you decide your problems are your own. You don't blame them on your mother, the economy, or the president.’ Tough words that, if appropriated into our lives, can be life-changing.
The book is well organised. It covers a range of topics such as reducing the need to constantly seek approval from others, dealing with anxiety, and getting rid of our fear of failure. As you read these chapters, Ellis articulates the principles of RET and how they apply in practice. This makes the book very practical.
Because Ellis’s language is very honest and straightforward, some readers might find him a bit too direct or harsh at times. RET is not about blaming us as individuals for our problems and issues. It has to be said that Ellis doesn’t quite navigate the fine line between blaming oneself and taking responsibility so a bit of caution is needed when reading the book.
Another issue is, because the book originated back in the early 60s, some of the language might be a bit outdated. The edition I was reading was published in 1997 so it still suffers from some of the language idiosyncrasies of the time. Even so, the principles are timeless and I have personally found them to be very helpful in understanding my own emotions and the need to think carefully about the assumptions, beliefs, and values that I hold that are the basis for them.
It’s interesting to note that many of the principes of RET are part of later psychotherapies such as Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) and Rational Emotive Behavioural Therapy (REBT). And the recent flurry of books on Stoic philosophy shows that many of the ancient ideas of Stoicism are the basis of more recent successful therapies.
A Guide to Rational Living is an excellent resource if you want to learn to have more control over your emotions and reactions. It’s been around a long time and is still selling which indicates the enduring nature of its principles. So if you are looking for a no-nonsense approach to improving yourself and living a better life, check it out.
Back in 1961, Albert Ellis published a book called A Guide to Rational Living that has stood the test of time, selling over a million copies and still selling today. Ellis called his therapy Rational Emotive Therapy (RET) which, at the time, was groundbreaking and challenged the common Freudian approach to psychotherapy.
The central idea of the book is that our emotions are the product of our thoughts, ideas, beliefs, and values rather than stuff coming out of our unconscious. If that was the case, we didn’t need to get upset or anxious or emotional about our circumstances or things happening to us if we changed our thinking about them. We can have control over our emotions and reactions to things. This idea is the foundational idea of the book. The book provides guidance on how to think more rationally about our emotions and encourages us to challenge our beliefs, values, ideas, etc and evaluate them to make sure they are reasonable. If our believe and values—the assumptions we make about things—are not realistic, true, or appropriate, then our emotions will cause us to experience some sort of emotional pain.
Ellis’s writing style is very straightforward, clear, and no-nonsense. I guess you could say it’s a no-bullshit approach. At one point he says that, ‘The best years of your life are the ones in which you decide your problems are your own. You don't blame them on your mother, the economy, or the president.’ Tough words that, if appropriated into our lives, can be life-changing.
The book is well organised. It covers a range of topics such as reducing the need to constantly seek approval from others, dealing with anxiety, and getting rid of our fear of failure. As you read these chapters, Ellis articulates the principles of RET and how they apply in practice. This makes the book very practical.
Because Ellis’s language is very honest and straightforward, some readers might find him a bit too direct or harsh at times. RET is not about blaming us as individuals for our problems and issues. It has to be said that Ellis doesn’t quite navigate the fine line between blaming oneself and taking responsibility so a bit of caution is needed when reading the book.
Another issue is, because the book originated back in the early 60s, some of the language might be a bit outdated. The edition I was reading was published in 1997 so it still suffers from some of the language idiosyncrasies of the time. Even so, the principles are timeless and I have personally found them to be very helpful in understanding my own emotions and the need to think carefully about the assumptions, beliefs, and values that I hold that are the basis for them.
It’s interesting to note that many of the principes of RET are part of later psychotherapies such as Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) and Rational Emotive Behavioural Therapy (REBT). And the recent flurry of books on Stoic philosophy shows that many of the ancient ideas of Stoicism are the basis of more recent successful therapies.
A Guide to Rational Living is an excellent resource if you want to learn to have more control over your emotions and reactions. It’s been around a long time and is still selling which indicates the enduring nature of its principles. So if you are looking for a no-nonsense approach to improving yourself and living a better life, check it out.
March 19, 2016
I've wanted to read this "classic" of self help for a while, and its as good an intro to cognitive behavioral therapy as anything out there. Lucid and helpful, but too many tales of "patients" (you can easily skim the ones you don't relate to). It's certainly easier said than done, but disputing your irrational beliefs, substituting rational ones, never did anyone any harm....
December 27, 2015
اوه!
یه کتاب فوق العاده ی خودیاری در زمینه روانشناسی که به هر بزرگسالی که منطقی و عاقلانه نمیتونه فکر کنه، پیشنهاد می کنم!
این کتاب می آموزد در حین اینکه عاقلانه به مسایل می پردازی، به همان اندازه هم احساسی باشی!
در ضمن این کتاب توسط یکی از بزرگان روانشناسی به نام آلبرت الیس نوشته شده...
یه کتاب فوق العاده ی خودیاری در زمینه روانشناسی که به هر بزرگسالی که منطقی و عاقلانه نمیتونه فکر کنه، پیشنهاد می کنم!
این کتاب می آموزد در حین اینکه عاقلانه به مسایل می پردازی، به همان اندازه هم احساسی باشی!
در ضمن این کتاب توسط یکی از بزرگان روانشناسی به نام آلبرت الیس نوشته شده...
December 1, 2025
Este o carte ce ne prezintă o formă de psihoterapie cognitiv comportamentală (CBT) și anume: REBT (Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy). Aceasta a fost creată de către cei doi autori: Albert Ellis și Robert A. Harper în anii '50. Cartea este o introducere în aceasta formă de terapie, prezentând multe exemple ale pacienților celor 2 si sfaturi cum să începi să îți schimbi convingerile negative.
January 19, 2021
Self-help, how-to-live-a-better-life books are a challenging genre. Their numbers are umpteen, and while each claims to have figured it out, the preponderance does an incredibly mediocre job. Does this one cut it? Well, I think it gets pretty close.
One honest and important thing you'll learn in this book is that it's not possible to attain perpetual serenity and jubilation. Even though this may seem obvious, in reality, we're apt to think that we can actually get there only if we try hard enough. Not only do we think that we can get there, we often believe that we must. Thinking that we must have something, be someone, somewhere, and somehow is where the trouble begins, for absolutistic beliefs almost inevitably lead to self-defeating, unproductive emotional states.
But the truth of the matter is that to live a good, fulfilled life you don’t have to be ceaselessly happy and undisturbed; neither do you have to be admired and astoundingly achieving; even treated fairly by others isn’t a prerequisite. While there’s nothing wrong in wanting these things, neither of them is the determinant of our worth, happiness, and self-acceptance. This book lets you see how this can be possible and provides a framework for addressing some of the misguided internal philosophies that almost universally afflict us.
I really wanted to give this book a 5. It changed my perspective, and that's precisely what you want from a book of this kind. That said, stylistically the authors could've done a much better job. While I can appreciate the rational core of the behavioral therapy, both Ellis and Harper often sound unnecessarily harsh, accusatory, and overly bold, which does a bit of a disservice to the great core concepts of the book.
One honest and important thing you'll learn in this book is that it's not possible to attain perpetual serenity and jubilation. Even though this may seem obvious, in reality, we're apt to think that we can actually get there only if we try hard enough. Not only do we think that we can get there, we often believe that we must. Thinking that we must have something, be someone, somewhere, and somehow is where the trouble begins, for absolutistic beliefs almost inevitably lead to self-defeating, unproductive emotional states.
But the truth of the matter is that to live a good, fulfilled life you don’t have to be ceaselessly happy and undisturbed; neither do you have to be admired and astoundingly achieving; even treated fairly by others isn’t a prerequisite. While there’s nothing wrong in wanting these things, neither of them is the determinant of our worth, happiness, and self-acceptance. This book lets you see how this can be possible and provides a framework for addressing some of the misguided internal philosophies that almost universally afflict us.
I really wanted to give this book a 5. It changed my perspective, and that's precisely what you want from a book of this kind. That said, stylistically the authors could've done a much better job. While I can appreciate the rational core of the behavioral therapy, both Ellis and Harper often sound unnecessarily harsh, accusatory, and overly bold, which does a bit of a disservice to the great core concepts of the book.
June 13, 2020
موفقیت و پیشرفت ربطی به ارزشمندی درونی شما ندارند مگر اینکه به میل خود چنین چیزی را قرارداد کنید. وقتی خودتان را بهخاطر موفقیت در هر زمینهای شخص "بهتر" یا "بزرگتری" میبینید، موقتاً احساس "ارزشمندی" خواهید کرد. اما نه موفقیتهای شما تاثیری بر ارزشمندی درونی شما دارند و نه شکستهایتان باعث افت "منیت" شما میشوند. البته دستیابی به برخی از اهداف، ممکن است باعث شود تا احساس شادی و کارآمدی بیشتری کنید، اما این احساس "بهتر بودن" دلیل نمیشود که "شخص بهتری" شده باشید. شما فقط به این خاطر "خوب"، "ارزشمند" یا "لایق" هستید (البته اگر اصرار زیادی بر این کلمات دارید) که وجود دارید و زندهاید. و اگر بهخاطر امکانات یا موفقیتهای روزافزون به خودتان میبالید که "بهتر" شدهاید، اشتباه میکنید. معمولا "غرور" ناشی از موفقیت، به غرور کاذب ختم میشود زیرا چنین غروری منبعث از این اعتقاد است که ارزش شما بستگی به موفقیتتان دارد، و حالا که موفق شدهاید پس لابد آدم ارزشمندی هستید.
صص ۱۳۸ و ۱۳۹
صص ۱۳۸ و ۱۳۹
September 6, 2022
Informative and interesting from an academic standpoint but the nature of REBT can be triggering to those who have endured abuse or invalidation of their experiences.
Being told to just change your beliefs and that you exaggerate the awfulness of your unpleasant experiences with the narration style being one of 'tough love' may be useful for some but patronising and dismissive for others.
Given the number of positive reviews, I imagine it may have some useful applications for daily life as many of us are walking around with somewhat fixed irrational beliefs.
I would recommend reading the book rather than listening to the audiobook where the narration feels like one long telling off.
Being told to just change your beliefs and that you exaggerate the awfulness of your unpleasant experiences with the narration style being one of 'tough love' may be useful for some but patronising and dismissive for others.
Given the number of positive reviews, I imagine it may have some useful applications for daily life as many of us are walking around with somewhat fixed irrational beliefs.
I would recommend reading the book rather than listening to the audiobook where the narration feels like one long telling off.
October 6, 2018
Bu kitap, daha akılcı düşünen bir insan olma yolunda ilerlerken insana en çok yardımı dokunacak bir kitap. Düşünce tarzınızı değiştirmeye yardım ederek kötü duygularınızdan kurtulmanuza yardım ediyor ve belki de depresyon gibi yıkıcı bir halden kurtuluyorsunuz. Kitap bir kişisel gelişim kitabı değil, kendine yardım kitabı olarak geçiyor. Geçici, gaza getirici söylemlerde bulunmak yerine, sorunlarınızın derininine inmenize yardımcı oluyor ve sorunların kökten çüzümü için önerilerde bulunuyor.
March 6, 2017
از طراحی جلد و اسم عامیانه کتاب که بگذریم، نگرش جالبی رو مطرح و ترویج میکنه. نویسندگان کتاب معتقدن چیزی که ما رو ناراحت میکنه و از مسیر اهدافمون دور میکنه نه اتفاقاتیه که برای ما میفته بلکه نوع نگاه ما به اون اتفاقاته و حرف هایی که راجع به اونها به خودمون میزنیم. درواقع کتاب به خوانندش کمک میکنه تا باورهای به اصطلاح نامعقول خودش رو پیدا کنه و اونا رو با باورهای معقول و منطقی جایگزین کنه.
September 16, 2019
با اینکه یه وقفه ی طولانی وسط خوندنش برام پیش اومد اما خیلی کتاب خوب و فوق العاده ایه! از اوناس که بنظرم باید توی مقاطع مختلف تحصیلی تدریس بشه!
هرچی بیشتر میگذره انگار بیشتر به درست بودنش پی میبرم..شاید این وقفه ای که برام افتاد باعث شد بهتر درکش کنم و با به کار بردن مهارتهاش اونا رو تجربه کنم.
بنظرم جز چند تا کتابیه که قبل مرگ باید خوند ! و برای زندگی به معنای واقعی عاقلانه لازمه
هرچی بیشتر میگذره انگار بیشتر به درست بودنش پی میبرم..شاید این وقفه ای که برام افتاد باعث شد بهتر درکش کنم و با به کار بردن مهارتهاش اونا رو تجربه کنم.
بنظرم جز چند تا کتابیه که قبل مرگ باید خوند ! و برای زندگی به معنای واقعی عاقلانه لازمه
Read
October 20, 2018قطعا جزییات زیادی داشت و مسایل مهم زیادی رو بررسی کرده بود...اما چیزی که از تمام فصل هاش برای همیشه به یادم میمونه
اینه که : هیچ چیز فاجعه نیست
اینه که : هیچ چیز فاجعه نیست
August 13, 2023
Kitabın ilk yarısında sürekli tekrarlayan ifadeler biraz sıkıcı olsa da kitabın ikinci yarısında basit ve etkili fikirler var.
November 25, 2025
Some good nuggets of information in here but it was a little hokey the way it was written. A lot of dialogue which was distracting. I would be interested in seeing a therapist with this kind of training however.
December 23, 2025
This one took me a while to get through. I'm glad I did. Well written, just packed with a lot of good information - took my time with each chapter to make sure I was getting what the authors were putting down.
February 3, 2017
This books makes obvious to me one of the limitations in reason based theories of therapy: they treat reason as ahistorical and universal in content while it is at best universal and historical in form only. Meaning the kind of through that is referred to as formal operational thinking has universal patterns of functioning [which developed somewhere in time as a species, and sometime in our lives personally]. Reason certainly does not have any universal or ahistorical content [though it does restrict and allow for a limited range of content].
The reason used throughout this book, is a reason filtered through both a historically situated time/place and the matrix of an asshole’s personality. The situatedness of time/place are glaringly obvious in this book on matters of sex and gender and the asshole personality is just glaringly obvious throughout. Take the asshole matrix away, situate the historical context closer to our time and you get something like CBT as practiced nowadays.
In both cases it is useful in reducing certain kinds of suffering that deal with helping people become better socialized. Which includes learning coping skills, developing self-reliance, challenging assumptions and internalizing new thoughts/assumptions that better fit one’s experience of the world.
Ideas in the book are worth 4 stars [especially for their pioneering effort], but the style, dated cultural context and asshole personality are worth 2. So the compromised score is 3.
Very reasonable.
The reason used throughout this book, is a reason filtered through both a historically situated time/place and the matrix of an asshole’s personality. The situatedness of time/place are glaringly obvious in this book on matters of sex and gender and the asshole personality is just glaringly obvious throughout. Take the asshole matrix away, situate the historical context closer to our time and you get something like CBT as practiced nowadays.
In both cases it is useful in reducing certain kinds of suffering that deal with helping people become better socialized. Which includes learning coping skills, developing self-reliance, challenging assumptions and internalizing new thoughts/assumptions that better fit one’s experience of the world.
Ideas in the book are worth 4 stars [especially for their pioneering effort], but the style, dated cultural context and asshole personality are worth 2. So the compromised score is 3.
Very reasonable.
March 3, 2023
This book first came out in 1961. I do have to say that I LOVE the books that came out between the 1930s-1960s. I can honestly say there’s no such thing as original ideas out there. It’s all of our interpretations of these ideas that attract so many different people. It’s how we take our own spin on what these books are saying and how they “speak” to us.
My favorite part of the book is where the authors walk you through the most common and problematic irrational beliefs and how to overcome each one. I've written more about it in my extensive review here - https://booksyougottaread.com/2021/01...
Going deeper it's also about how we react not to things but to our thoughts and judgments of how our inner voice talks to us, which creates friction and our experiences.
Your emotions and behavior will significantly change when you change your beliefs about something.
This is one of the best books I've read about how to change your beliefs, with exercises and lots of support about how to do so. If this interests you, I'd highly recommend getting a copy.
My favorite part of the book is where the authors walk you through the most common and problematic irrational beliefs and how to overcome each one. I've written more about it in my extensive review here - https://booksyougottaread.com/2021/01...
Going deeper it's also about how we react not to things but to our thoughts and judgments of how our inner voice talks to us, which creates friction and our experiences.
Your emotions and behavior will significantly change when you change your beliefs about something.
This is one of the best books I've read about how to change your beliefs, with exercises and lots of support about how to do so. If this interests you, I'd highly recommend getting a copy.
October 11, 2024
آلبرت الیس، از برجسته ترین روانشناسان قرن بیستم، با ابداع روش رفتاردرمانی عقلانی-هیجانی (REBT) تحولی شگرف در این حوزه ایجاد کرد. این روش بر پایه این اصل استوار است که افکار غیرعقلانی ریشه بسیاری از احساسات و رفتارهای مخرب هستند. الیس در کتاب خود، «راهنمایی برای زندگی عاقلانه»، (یا ترجمه در ایران «زندگی عاقلانه»، «عاقلانه فکر کنید، راحتتر زندگی کنید»)، با نگاهی عمیق به ریشههای افکار مخربی چون تعصب، بدبینی، تحجر، اضطراب و ...، راهکارهایی عملی و مبتنی بر منطق برای مقابله با آنها ارائه میدهد. وی با زبانی ساده، خواننده را با تکنیکهای تغییر باورهای غیرعقلانی آشنا میکند تا بتواند بر افکار منفی غلبه کرده و زندگی آرامتر و شادتری را تجربه کند. برای مثال، فردی که از سخنرانی در جمع هراس دارد، میتواند با کمک این روش، افکار ناکارآمدی چون "باید کامل باشم" یا "اگر اشتباه کنم، همه مرا مسخره میکنند" را شناسایی کرده و آنها را با باورهای واقعبینانهتری مانند "هیچکس کامل نیست" یا "اشتباه کردن بخشی از زندگی است" جایگزین کند. این کتاب با تکیه بر تجربیات ارزشمند الیس، به خواننده نگرشی تازه در زندگی می دهد و به او کمک می کند با چالش های روانی به طور موثرتری مقابله کند.
December 30, 2023
Outdated, limited usefulness, very rambling and overlong, aggressive tone.
I appreciate the theory behind the book, that reframing thoughts can help you better manage disorders like depression, etc. But the book doesn't provide an easy-to-follow method for implementing that in your daily life. Just shouting 'be more rational!' isn't enough to help most people. Much better, practical books have been released since, or more recently, apps. We've also discovered the importance of meditation, exercise and sleeping on mental health, which Ellis doesn't get into.
It might provide some limited benefit as a kind of 'shock to the system' to shake someone out of their more unhelpful beliefs, but I'd say not most people.
On top of that, the book goes on and on, he regularly takes several pages to describe what could've been done in one or less.
His tone is also combattive and aggressive, straying into offensive occasionally. This will definitely put off a lot of people. Neither is it far to attack vulnerable people who are dealing with difficulties.
I appreciate the theory behind the book, that reframing thoughts can help you better manage disorders like depression, etc. But the book doesn't provide an easy-to-follow method for implementing that in your daily life. Just shouting 'be more rational!' isn't enough to help most people. Much better, practical books have been released since, or more recently, apps. We've also discovered the importance of meditation, exercise and sleeping on mental health, which Ellis doesn't get into.
It might provide some limited benefit as a kind of 'shock to the system' to shake someone out of their more unhelpful beliefs, but I'd say not most people.
On top of that, the book goes on and on, he regularly takes several pages to describe what could've been done in one or less.
His tone is also combattive and aggressive, straying into offensive occasionally. This will definitely put off a lot of people. Neither is it far to attack vulnerable people who are dealing with difficulties.
May 4, 2017
This is one of the best books ever written. If I was trapped on a deserted island and could only choose one book, A guide to rational living would be it! Why? Simply put, this is the manual to how human beings think, act and emote! If there was ever a guide to understanding yourself, this is the most accurate depiction of human experience and irrationality.
Profound changes have occurred in my mindset, behaviour and emotions as I have slowly digested the concepts and practices in this tome. Whilst I am well aware that the journey is just beginning, I feel blessed to have this wisdom available to me so that I can live an enjoyable and efficient life as possible!
Have you have ever wanted to understand why you do the crazy things you do, why others commit incomprehensible acts, why do we sabotage ourselves and crucially, how can we fix all of the aforementioned? The answer starts with this book. Your mileage may vary!
Profound changes have occurred in my mindset, behaviour and emotions as I have slowly digested the concepts and practices in this tome. Whilst I am well aware that the journey is just beginning, I feel blessed to have this wisdom available to me so that I can live an enjoyable and efficient life as possible!
Have you have ever wanted to understand why you do the crazy things you do, why others commit incomprehensible acts, why do we sabotage ourselves and crucially, how can we fix all of the aforementioned? The answer starts with this book. Your mileage may vary!
May 18, 2013
I found helpful advise in this book on right thinking. Rational Emotiv Behavior Therapy (REBT) model is a helpful way to look at the many things. This book explores that concept. Start with any of the Albert Ellis website or Q and A (http://www.rebtnetwork.org/ask.html) and then you may be interested in reading the book based upon his theory. I found his response to "How do we have and maintain good relationship and marriage" advice eternally useful and extremely practical one. http://www.rebtnetwork.org/ask/jul06....
Given that I had read many articles on REBT and had started following some of it's principles, I found this book helpful to follow along.
Given that I had read many articles on REBT and had started following some of it's principles, I found this book helpful to follow along.
December 15, 2017
A fascinating look at the almost inevitable irrationalities that we carry with us each day... and a profound solution to this problem that has the capability to reduce almost all forms of stress and depression in our lives. It's unfortunately still possible to feel sad, but as Ellis argues, also possible to not have that sadness dictate your life in a negative way. We are fallible humans who often needlessly sabotage ourselves in the most ludicrous ways. Highly recommended for everyone, it's almost impossible to not suddenly begin to think in an advantageous way for yourself, day after day, after reading this.
August 18, 2015
I was surprised and pleased to find my philosophy of personal growth laid out so succinctly.
Albert Ellis describes his Rational Emotive Therapy, which was the basis for today's Cognitive Behavioral Theory.
The book is perhaps overly-patronizing at times, but would not have been during the time it was written. It's also difficult to get some of these points across without oversimplifying. This edition includes a postscript examining what has changed in RET and how the authors apply it today, which is written much more analytically.
Albert Ellis describes his Rational Emotive Therapy, which was the basis for today's Cognitive Behavioral Theory.
The book is perhaps overly-patronizing at times, but would not have been during the time it was written. It's also difficult to get some of these points across without oversimplifying. This edition includes a postscript examining what has changed in RET and how the authors apply it today, which is written much more analytically.
August 26, 2017
"Hayat bazen çok kötü oluyor, ama aynı zamanda eğlenceli de olabilir ve ben kesinlikle hayatımı daha eğlenceli kılabilirim"
"Siz sürekli değişen bir birey ve bir yapı kurucu, bir yaratıcısınız. Bugün yarattığınız bir şeyi yarın büyük ölçüde değiştirebilirsiniz"
"Siz sürekli değişen bir birey ve bir yapı kurucu, bir yaratıcısınız. Bugün yarattığınız bir şeyi yarın büyük ölçüde değiştirebilirsiniz"
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