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Leading and Loving It: Encouragement for Pastors' Wives and Women in Leadership
Being a woman in ministry, whether you are partnering with your husband in his calling or serving in your own leadership role, is challenging. While serving as mentors, counselors, advisors, and even cheerleaders, women carry numerous responsibilities. Lori Wilhite and Brandi Wilson know about this first-hand as the wives of two well-known pastors in America.
Everyone has an image in their mind of what they think a pastor's wife should be. The trouble with this picture is that it has never been and never will be accurate. Ministry wives and female ministry leaders face the same real-life struggles as their church members, but have the added stress of sharing in everyone's burdens as well. They are held to impossible standards by those they serve, and the more this ideal of women in leadership is expected, the more we turn up the intensity in the pressure cooker that is life in ministry.
In Leading and Loving It , Lori Wilhite and Brandi Wilson offer a support system to help women make connections to get the encouragement that sustains them and become equipped for the ministry God has called them to pursue. They give readers tools for understanding that external pressures and expectations are only important if they fall in line with what God intends for your life and ministry and they give answers for how to deal with criticism, isolation, finding your personal calling, and what happens when you reach a place of burn-out, and more.
Everyone has an image in their mind of what they think a pastor's wife should be. The trouble with this picture is that it has never been and never will be accurate. Ministry wives and female ministry leaders face the same real-life struggles as their church members, but have the added stress of sharing in everyone's burdens as well. They are held to impossible standards by those they serve, and the more this ideal of women in leadership is expected, the more we turn up the intensity in the pressure cooker that is life in ministry.
In Leading and Loving It , Lori Wilhite and Brandi Wilson offer a support system to help women make connections to get the encouragement that sustains them and become equipped for the ministry God has called them to pursue. They give readers tools for understanding that external pressures and expectations are only important if they fall in line with what God intends for your life and ministry and they give answers for how to deal with criticism, isolation, finding your personal calling, and what happens when you reach a place of burn-out, and more.
241 pages, Paperback
First published January 1, 2013
28 people are currently reading
261 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 14 of 14 reviews
August 30, 2013
As a single chick in ministry it can sometimes be hard to read books that are about women in ministry. It can seem like they're only aimed at women who are married and have kids. Though both Prs. Lori & Brandi fall into that camp and, obviously, write from that perspective, their heart for women serving in ministry, no matter what season of life they're in, is evident. In every chapter (even the ones about husbands & kids), I was able to glean principles that are foundational to thriving as a chick leader. Even as they wrote through the filter of their season of life, the principles they bring out transcend season and ministry position and speak to heart issues that every chick leader should address. (I also took some good notes on what to do as my season changes in the future :)). It's a fun read and great to glean from.
Leading and Loving It is not only a great book, but a great ministry!! After you read the book, check out leadingandlovingit.com to see what else Prs. Lori & Brandi are doing :)
Leading and Loving It is not only a great book, but a great ministry!! After you read the book, check out leadingandlovingit.com to see what else Prs. Lori & Brandi are doing :)
January 8, 2021
This book was good... But not amazing. Clearly written for pastor's wives, there was some insight that I found incredibly helpful and applicable. I especially appreciated the insight on expectations, friendship/community, and raising children. However, the authors are coming from a much more contemporary perspective than I'm used to... There was a lot of talk about tight skinny jeans, country music, popular rock bands, drums and guitars in church, the strip in Las Vegas, etc. All that aside, it still provided me with some insightful things I want to remember as a wife in ministry.
August 24, 2013
Leading and Loving It is a brand new work with the purpose of encouraging and enlightening women in ministry. The authors share freely from their personal experiences which lends intimacy and realness to the text. The tone is casual, warm and engaging, as if you were chatting with them at your local coffee house.
Wilhite and Wilson address many of the top struggles for pastors’ wives including influence, expectations, calling, marriage, kids, friendship, loneliness, balance, criticism, burnout, and transition. The topics are well-selected and they quote from a variety of friends, well-known Christian leaders, and other authors. Unfortunately, there is little Scripture referenced and very little in-depth study of God’s Word to derive premises.
The development of a proactive spirit in seeking connection and community was solid in the “Change and Transition” chapter. In addition, I found the advice in the “Expectations and the Pedestal” helpful. In particular, the delineation that we are not omniscience, omnipresent or omnipotent was a beneficial reminder.
The cover addresses the audience as pastors’ wives and women in leadership, but the book’s focus is clearly pastors’ wives with children. The authors address this narrower audience well and from an informed experience, but there were limited examples that did not involve their children (thus excluding pastors’ wives who are childless) and limited examples involving ministry from a female leadership perspective other than the role of a pastors’ wife. Just the slightest adjustment of clarifying this book for pastors’ wives would make a tremendous improvement in the interpretation of the text. I was constantly looking for women in leadership and/or women without children stories, but was left lacking. However, in the realm of married with children pastors’ wives, this book’s market fits that specific niche.
I appreciate their first attempt at writing professionally and commend them for speaking vulnerably from their hearts. I believe many will enjoy this work and find comfort within its pages.
Wilhite and Wilson address many of the top struggles for pastors’ wives including influence, expectations, calling, marriage, kids, friendship, loneliness, balance, criticism, burnout, and transition. The topics are well-selected and they quote from a variety of friends, well-known Christian leaders, and other authors. Unfortunately, there is little Scripture referenced and very little in-depth study of God’s Word to derive premises.
The development of a proactive spirit in seeking connection and community was solid in the “Change and Transition” chapter. In addition, I found the advice in the “Expectations and the Pedestal” helpful. In particular, the delineation that we are not omniscience, omnipresent or omnipotent was a beneficial reminder.
The cover addresses the audience as pastors’ wives and women in leadership, but the book’s focus is clearly pastors’ wives with children. The authors address this narrower audience well and from an informed experience, but there were limited examples that did not involve their children (thus excluding pastors’ wives who are childless) and limited examples involving ministry from a female leadership perspective other than the role of a pastors’ wife. Just the slightest adjustment of clarifying this book for pastors’ wives would make a tremendous improvement in the interpretation of the text. I was constantly looking for women in leadership and/or women without children stories, but was left lacking. However, in the realm of married with children pastors’ wives, this book’s market fits that specific niche.
I appreciate their first attempt at writing professionally and commend them for speaking vulnerably from their hearts. I believe many will enjoy this work and find comfort within its pages.
December 2, 2013
This book was very refreshing and encouraging for me! It's good to hear high-profile ministry leaders talk about real-life issues and struggles. That's what Lori and Brandi do in this book. I've never met either of them, but, after reading Leading and Loving It, I feel like I know them both.
The one downside of this book for me was the fact that this book was clearly written to wives and mothers. I don't think there was even one mention of the single woman in ministry. This is completely understandable considering that both Lori and Brandi are pastors' wives, but it was just a tiny drawback for me.
Overall, though, I walk away from this book feeling really encouraged. I love this quote from the final chapter: "God knew exactly what He was doing, exactly who He was calling. He knows our shortcomings and our struggles, and He extended His call to leadership and ministry anyway."
The one downside of this book for me was the fact that this book was clearly written to wives and mothers. I don't think there was even one mention of the single woman in ministry. This is completely understandable considering that both Lori and Brandi are pastors' wives, but it was just a tiny drawback for me.
Overall, though, I walk away from this book feeling really encouraged. I love this quote from the final chapter: "God knew exactly what He was doing, exactly who He was calling. He knows our shortcomings and our struggles, and He extended His call to leadership and ministry anyway."
February 16, 2016
I think this book is good but I think you would need to be a women in a lead role to fully understand what is being said. lots of good stories that are unfortunately true sad but true. we are all human and make mistakes and being on both sides of having to leave a church and lead a church maintain relationships and love is most important and even more important developing that passion for God and a relationship with Him will help you move forward. Good thoughts from Brandi and lori
July 17, 2018
This is an encouraging look at the roll of women serving the church, either as pastors or a pastor’s spouse. There is a weight to serving the church and the authors look at the many facets of a life lived in ministry. They discuss a myriad of relevant topics with insight and experience. I wish it were more in depth, but I understand this is a book version of their website and online community they are cultivating.
January 10, 2019
If I was in a discouraging point of ministry, this book may be just what I needed.
As it is, it was okay. A LOT of personal stories which made it easy to read but sometimes seemed a little unnecessary.
I’m glad this book exists, I enjoyed it. I would recommend it to others in ministry. Just wasn’t my favourite.
As it is, it was okay. A LOT of personal stories which made it easy to read but sometimes seemed a little unnecessary.
I’m glad this book exists, I enjoyed it. I would recommend it to others in ministry. Just wasn’t my favourite.
August 30, 2014
Very practical. Good take aways from each chapter. A good reminder that there are no typical pastor's wives and yet we all have lots in common. I wanted to send chapter 10 to a couple of friends going through tough ministry transitions. Good advice!
March 10, 2014
Wow! What a book of encouragement! Seriously loved this book. As horrible as this may sound, I liked the fact that this wasn't a bible study and that it was a book of encouragement. Such relatable feelings and emotions throughout. Absolutely loved it!
November 26, 2018
I wish I’d have known about this book when I first became a minister’s wife. So much practical, Biblical advice and encouragement from women who have been there and get it. I highly recommend this for any minister’s wife or woman in Christian leadership.
September 13, 2013
What a nice surprise. I wasn't sure what to expect from this one. My hats off to these great ladies Wilhite and Wilson. Thanks for reminding me that indeed God made me to lead!
March 1, 2015
This book is a must-read for all women who are actively involved within their church, and/or who are Pastor's wives, and/or in Leadership. This book was a great encouragement to me!
December 28, 2018
Encouraging! I am a Lead Pastor’s wife and purchased this book for all of our ministry wives for Christmas. So practical, insightful, encouraging, humorous and helpful! Must read!
April 9, 2019
Really great tips and experiences for me to learn and prepare as a newbie to this role. Thankful for Godly perspectives and ideas.
Displaying 1 - 14 of 14 reviews