The Geography of You and Me

by Amy Bickers

"Amy Bickers weaves a stunning tale of love and loss in the Deep South. She'll break your heart. Read. This. Book." - Sara Benincasa, author of Agorafabulous!: Dispatches From My Bedroom and DC Trip

Magazine editor and single mother Amy Bickers was finally putting her life together after a long divorce when, on an August night in 2009, she witnessed the suicide of her ex-husband. In 2009, 36,909 suicides were reported in the United States. In the years since, that number has increased. In 2013, the most recent year for which statistics are available, there were 41,149 suicides reported in the U.S. Around the world, more than 800,000 people will die by suicide this year. It is said that each suicide intimately affects six friends and family members. A suicide every 13.7 minutes in the U.S. is tragically multiplied by six: six people who are called “survivors." The Geography of You and Me is a deeply personal and honest exploration of what came next: grief, post-traumatic stress, and healing. It is a journey filled with dark humor, rap songs by Ludacris, therapeutic cursing, and a perfectly healthy fixation on George Clooney. The Geography of You and Me is ultimately a story of forgiveness and hope. Amy forgave her ex-husband almost immediately. The struggle after his death was to forgive herself and to find a way forward in an uncertain landscape.

Unknown Binding

First published September 1, 2015

Reviews

[Carla Jean · Rating 5 out of 5]

One of the (if not THE) best books I've read in 2012. Amy Bickers faces the incredibly challenging and heart-wrenching topic of suicide face on, never flinching but also never failing to reveal her humanity. Those who have lost a loved one to suicide will find in these pages a reminder that they aren't alone; those for whom this subject is foreign will find a glimpse into a world that is reality for too many people. This memoir is frank and beautifully rendered.

[Judy Williams · Rating 4 out of 5]

I loved this book. If you're not interested in or familiar with addiction, it may not be for you. But since I'm in on both counts, it was a difficult but inspiring read for me. Simple and hopeful.

[Melinda Jones · Rating 4 out of 5]

A really good book about suicide and how it affects your whole family.Amy really told a good story.

[Sharla · Rating 4 out of 5]

Well, I had written up a really awesome review, and then the page re-loaded and lost it! I'll make an attempt at recreating it, but trust me, it was eloquent, flattering, and filled with thematic insights. This isn't the first time this has happened to me on goodreads -- I should have learned my CYA copytext lesson already.....

With regards to this book, I've been a faithful reader of the author's blog for several years, and discovered it after my own personal event of loss and life-adjustments led me in google searches of the vast interwebs for people who had gone through these type of things and lived to tell/cry/laugh about it. Amy has a phenomenal voice that perfectly blends an eloquent and humorous tone to tell a deeply moving story of her journey through and beyond tragedy. The book is great, and the only thing I'd offer for improvement is if she had somehow been able to incorporate her impressive skill with integrating animated gifs into the storyline. :)

Some of my favorite passages:

"The opposite of love is not hate, it is indifference"

"Sarcasm is the best way to express what you're feeling so you don't have to fully feel what you're expressing."

"Maybe writing was the way to get it out of me, to cut it out like a cancer that had invaded my brain."

"There is freedom in choosing love over anger.
There is freedom in choosing the side of light."

[Jenny Pierson · Rating 5 out of 5]

I could NOT put this book down. It is spectacular. It is the best written book that I have read in years. Amy is funny, sarcastic, and heartbreakingly honest about her pain. Addiction and suicide are topics that are rarely touched on in the depth that this author delves into. I feel like she put her heart on a plate for us to read, a heart that should be handled tenderly and gently as this precious heart has endured all of the pain that it can endure. This book tells a love story between college students, husband and wife, father and children, and most sweetly mother and child. She tells of that moment that she had to tell her children of the death of their father. As a mother I cannot imagine that moment. She has handled criticism, hatred, and fear with grace and dignity and this is the tale of her overcoming fear with grace. I encourage you to read it and put yourself in her place, everyone knows someone touched by addiction. Maybe this will be the tale you need to read to get help for yourself or your loved one. Let Amy save you with her words and her spirit of generosity in sharing her story, a story that was waiting for her to tell.

[Erin Bates · Rating 5 out of 5]

Insightful and moving!

Wonderful read on a tough subject. Love how it is deep at times and you realize your crying only to have you laughing in the next paragraph!

[Trisha Palencer · Rating 5 out of 5]

Honest, open, and powerful. Trauma and recovery are always hidden, covered up, and downplayed. This book was incredible.