My only real knowledge of “Wonder Woman” comes from the George Perez comic books from the 1980s, which is, according to many fans, the zenith era of that DC title. Perez is one of my personal favorite comic book writer/artists of all time, so I feel like I’ve learned a lot about the Amazonian warrior princess just from reading those.
I’ve always had questions about her origin story, though. Not the story of her being raised on Themyscira, falling in love with pilot Steve Trevor, and going off to fight human wars under her super-heroine name Wonder Woman while living a normal life as alter ego Diana Prince. That I don’t have a problem with.
It’s her birth I have trouble with. According to most sources, Diana was born after her mother, Queen Hippolyta, shaped her out of clay. She was then breathed life into her by the goddesses of Mount Olympus. This is one story.
Writer Brian Azzarello was hired on to write for Wonder Woman in 2011, and in that run, Diana’s birth story became radically different. In my opinion, it also became somewhat more believable.
I have always felt that the pantheon of Greek Gods were a bunch of selfish assholes, led by the biggest asshole himself, Zeus. Hera, his wife, was a jealous bitch. (Although, granted, she had every reason to be.) Zeus’s brothers and children were a bunch of snot-nosed little shits always fighting to steal their father’s throne, either by trying to kill him or dethrone him in other shady ways. Not a single one was likable.
By the way, I’m not making this impression up out of whole cloth or based on nothing. I’m basing it on the actual legends of Greek mythology, which I remember from 8th grade English class and, later, in a college Mythology course I took. (I’m not even sure if this stuff is taught in high school anymore, and if it isn’t, it’s an extremely sad commentary on our educational system.)
Zeus was a rapist. Nearly every Greek legend one reads about Zeus makes this quite clear. He raped a lot of human women, giving birth to a lot of illegitimate children. His most famous, of course, was Hercules, who was, by all accounts, also kind of a dick.
Anyway, part of Azzarello’s shocking “twist” on Diana’s origin story is that we discover that Hippolyta has been lying to her daughter and every other Amazon of Themyscira for centuries. Apparently, Zeus (disguising himself as a human) and Hippolyta had a one-night stand, which, nine months later, produced Diana.
Now, I don’t know how this revelation went over with fans of the comic book. I would assume that it may have been shocking to many. I would even imagine a few nasty letters of reprimand and “how dare you mess with the sacredness of Wonder Woman’s origin story blah blah blah…” made its way to DC’s editors.
Personally, I think it makes a hell of a lot more sense than some woman shaping a baby out of clay and then having a bunch of goddesses sprinkle life-giving fairy dust on it. That always struck me as being a bit too Disney.
But lust-hungry Zeus the Walking Phallus popping his mummy-daddy button in Hippolyta’s hoo-ha during a terrific night of Greek God-on-unsuspecting human female sex just sounds right.
Anyway, Volume 1, “Blood” is damn good. Azzarello, in my opinion, knocked this out of the park. And, yes, I’m well aware that making a sexual “home run” joke about a comic book about a cosmic rapist is in poor taste. Sorry.