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I Promise Not to Suffer: A Fool for Love Hikes the Pacific Crest Trail
With comfortable urban lives in Houston, Texas, and career and life goals mostly accomplished, Gail D. Storey and her husband were in their fifties when they decided it was time to test themselves on a new path—a 2,663-mile path known as the Pacific Crest Trail, which stretches from Mexico to Canada.
I Promise Not to Suffer is Gail's light-hearted yet heart-felt memoir about her and her husband's adventures and misadventures, deepening marriage, and reflections on being irrevocably changed by life on the trail. She was a novice hiker, while he was an experienced outdoorsman. Removed from their usual routines and living outside in the wilderness for months exposed hidden intricacies in their relationship. Hiking 20 miles a day over mountains, thirsting in the high desert of California, forcing frozen feet into icy socks and boots each morning in the High Sierra, stumbling through lava fields in Oregon—Gail was required to meet the elements on their own tough-love terms. From an encounter with a mountain lion to her mother's battle with cancer at home, she confronts each challenge with wit and brave style. While a dangerous loss of weight forces Gail to leave the PCT after 900 miles, she regains strength and later rejoins her husband on sections until he triumphantly reaches the northern terminus in Canada.
Humorous yet honest, this journey of harrowing hilarity and reluctant revelations will be loved by active hikers (appendices include details of their unique ultralight gear and other essential how-to information), fans of female adventure stories, and armchair travelers alike.
I Promise Not to Suffer is Gail's light-hearted yet heart-felt memoir about her and her husband's adventures and misadventures, deepening marriage, and reflections on being irrevocably changed by life on the trail. She was a novice hiker, while he was an experienced outdoorsman. Removed from their usual routines and living outside in the wilderness for months exposed hidden intricacies in their relationship. Hiking 20 miles a day over mountains, thirsting in the high desert of California, forcing frozen feet into icy socks and boots each morning in the High Sierra, stumbling through lava fields in Oregon—Gail was required to meet the elements on their own tough-love terms. From an encounter with a mountain lion to her mother's battle with cancer at home, she confronts each challenge with wit and brave style. While a dangerous loss of weight forces Gail to leave the PCT after 900 miles, she regains strength and later rejoins her husband on sections until he triumphantly reaches the northern terminus in Canada.
Humorous yet honest, this journey of harrowing hilarity and reluctant revelations will be loved by active hikers (appendices include details of their unique ultralight gear and other essential how-to information), fans of female adventure stories, and armchair travelers alike.
224 pages, Paperback
First published January 1, 2013
38 people are currently reading
1476 people want to read
About the author
Gail D. Storey
3 books34 followersI'm the author of I PROMISE NOT TO SUFFER: A Fool for Love Hikes the Pacific Crest Trail, Winner of the National Outdoor Book Award, Nautilus Silver Award, Foreword/IndieFab Book of the Year, Colorado Book Award, and Barbara Savage Award from The Mountaineers Books, 2013. A non-hiker, I was out of my mind hiking the PCT with my husband, but I lived to tell the tale and we're still married!
My first novel, THE LORD'S MOTEL (Persea Books, NY), is about a woman in love with the wrong man and all the trouble she gets into with him. Its sequel, GOD'S COUNTRY CLUB, is about a woman in love with the right man but all the trouble she gets into dragging her old issues along with her.
My husband, Porter Storey, and I bicycled our tandem from Texas to Maine and Texas to San Diego. He's a hospice and palliative care physician. He also made most of our outdoor gear, as well as the enormous cake I occasionally jump out of at dinner parties.
My first novel, THE LORD'S MOTEL (Persea Books, NY), is about a woman in love with the wrong man and all the trouble she gets into with him. Its sequel, GOD'S COUNTRY CLUB, is about a woman in love with the right man but all the trouble she gets into dragging her old issues along with her.
My husband, Porter Storey, and I bicycled our tandem from Texas to Maine and Texas to San Diego. He's a hospice and palliative care physician. He also made most of our outdoor gear, as well as the enormous cake I occasionally jump out of at dinner parties.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 190 reviews
June 1, 2015
I was fortunate enough to receive this via First-Reads Giveaway. I had just finished Cheryl Strayed's Wild: From Lost to Found on the Pacific Crest Trail, so I was particularly thrilled to discover this book.
I enjoyed Ms. Storey's account tremendously. Barely into the book, I began to feel as if I were reading letters from a friend. Although her determination to embark on this journey baffles me, I admire it. Actually, that may be one of things I like best about her story. The bravery that she continues to summon parallels only with her tenacity to stick with the hike.
For me, the most amazing thing about this book is the fact that she glorifies absolutely nothing about the hike. Any sane person would say "no, thanks" to this adventure after reading her honest chronicles of life on the trail; but despite the thought of frozen socks, fording rivers and sweltering heat, a tiny part of me still says "Man, I would love to do this". I guess that what that little voice really means is: wow, I wish had the courage, confidence and strength to take this on. Since I don't, I'll happily cheer on those who do. Who knows, maybe I'll make a fun "trail angel" someday.
Not only will I be reading more from Ms. Storey, I will most certainly be purchasing other Mountaineer Books in the near future.
I enjoyed Ms. Storey's account tremendously. Barely into the book, I began to feel as if I were reading letters from a friend. Although her determination to embark on this journey baffles me, I admire it. Actually, that may be one of things I like best about her story. The bravery that she continues to summon parallels only with her tenacity to stick with the hike.
For me, the most amazing thing about this book is the fact that she glorifies absolutely nothing about the hike. Any sane person would say "no, thanks" to this adventure after reading her honest chronicles of life on the trail; but despite the thought of frozen socks, fording rivers and sweltering heat, a tiny part of me still says "Man, I would love to do this". I guess that what that little voice really means is: wow, I wish had the courage, confidence and strength to take this on. Since I don't, I'll happily cheer on those who do. Who knows, maybe I'll make a fun "trail angel" someday.
Not only will I be reading more from Ms. Storey, I will most certainly be purchasing other Mountaineer Books in the near future.
July 28, 2013
I made it to page 96 before giving up. Like "Wild", this woman seems to have issues with sex and feels the need to share that with us. I finally reached a point where I realized I really didn't like her, so didn't care whether she finished the hike or fell in a hole. If you read it, you might want to have some cheese to go with her whine.
June 12, 2014
I almost didn't read Cheryl Strayed's "Wild," worrying it was another "woman finds herself on the trail and overcomes adversity and takes in beautiful scenery" books. I'm so glad I read it, because it was so much more than that, it did however lull me into reading "I promise not to suffer," which is everything I worried Strayed's book would be, but even worse.
First, I didn't understand why the author hiked the trail simply because her husband wanted to. She didn't want to, but she also didn't want him to do it without her. I think I was already a little annoyed with her because she was so afraid of being on her own or away from him she had to crash his trip and potentially ruin the experience for him. If this was something she had really wanted to do from the beginning, but then struggled along the way I would have understood and empathized, but why would someone who doesn't like hiking or camping insist she had to go on the trip? I get facing things we fear, or don't like, or think we can't do, but I don't think doing it at the expense of someone else's dream to do a specific trail or activity is right.
Also, her husband had the much more interesting story, fashioning and building much of their gear, leaving his work as a hospice doctor to figure out a new career and finishing the trail.
I also found the descriptions boring and following a "and then we did this, then we did this, then we did this," list type of writing which didn't hold my interest.
It did however make me want to hike the PCT, or least a part of it and their gear list in the appendix was interesting-probably the most interesting part of the book.
First, I didn't understand why the author hiked the trail simply because her husband wanted to. She didn't want to, but she also didn't want him to do it without her. I think I was already a little annoyed with her because she was so afraid of being on her own or away from him she had to crash his trip and potentially ruin the experience for him. If this was something she had really wanted to do from the beginning, but then struggled along the way I would have understood and empathized, but why would someone who doesn't like hiking or camping insist she had to go on the trip? I get facing things we fear, or don't like, or think we can't do, but I don't think doing it at the expense of someone else's dream to do a specific trail or activity is right.
Also, her husband had the much more interesting story, fashioning and building much of their gear, leaving his work as a hospice doctor to figure out a new career and finishing the trail.
I also found the descriptions boring and following a "and then we did this, then we did this, then we did this," list type of writing which didn't hold my interest.
It did however make me want to hike the PCT, or least a part of it and their gear list in the appendix was interesting-probably the most interesting part of the book.
August 22, 2013
Some things are best experienced firsthand, but there are some adventures I would rather experience vicariously from my comfy spot on the couch, cup of tea in hand.
Thankfully, a good book can help me do just that.
I just finished Gail Storey’s memoir I Promise Not to Suffer: A Fool for Love Hikes the Pacific Crest Trail, and I’m adding through-hiking the PCT to the list of adventures I’d rather read about than experience.
This isn’t the first time a memoir has talked me out of something: Michael Ruhlman killed my romantic dream of attending culinary school; Jon Krakauer convinced me that guided tours aside, climbing Everest is anything but easy and definitely not for me–unless we’re talking about the literary version.
I knew little about the Pacific Crest Trail when I began I Promise Not to Suffer. The PCT has only been around for twenty years; it was completed in 1993, a western counterpart to the Appalachian Trail. Through-hikers–those who cover the entire trail–begin at the Mexican border in Southern California and cover 2,650 miles before reaching the trail’s end at the Canadian border. Hikers can’t depart until California’s late spring storms are over, which leaves only six months to make it to northern Washington before the blizzards begin. Hikers need to cover more than twenty miles a day to make it in time.
Storey didn’t want to hike the trail in the first place. But her husband, a hospice director, was desperate to hike the PCT while he was in a major career transition, and Storey couldn’t bear the thought of spending six months apart. “The problem is,” she told him, “if you hike the PCT, I have to go too,” I said. “And I’m not.”
But she does, eventually won over by the promise of spending six months together on the trail, far from the demands of everyday life.
This is not a typical adventure memoir, but Storey is not typical PCT material. Most of the through hikers who tackle the 2,650 mile route each year are twenty-something males. But Storey and her husband are 56 and 52, respectively, when they decide to take on the trail; she calls her adventure her “two-thirds life crisis.”
Adventure is no under-statement. I’m a city girl, and was genuinely surprised at how harrowing their journey was: they endure summer storms, pick their way down icy slopes, encounter a mountain lion, and nearly drown crossing a river. It’s no wonder that only half of the hikers who start out each year make it to trail’s end. The hardships of the trail make a community out of the hikers, and my favorite parts of the story involve these friends and the “trail angels” who make their journey a little easier.
No spoilers here, but I wasn’t expecting Storey’s journey to unfold the way it did. 900 miles in, something unexpected occurs, and the turn of events improved my opinion of Storey–who had seemed a little self-absorbed up to that point–and the story itself.
Thankfully, a good book can help me do just that.
I just finished Gail Storey’s memoir I Promise Not to Suffer: A Fool for Love Hikes the Pacific Crest Trail, and I’m adding through-hiking the PCT to the list of adventures I’d rather read about than experience.
This isn’t the first time a memoir has talked me out of something: Michael Ruhlman killed my romantic dream of attending culinary school; Jon Krakauer convinced me that guided tours aside, climbing Everest is anything but easy and definitely not for me–unless we’re talking about the literary version.
I knew little about the Pacific Crest Trail when I began I Promise Not to Suffer. The PCT has only been around for twenty years; it was completed in 1993, a western counterpart to the Appalachian Trail. Through-hikers–those who cover the entire trail–begin at the Mexican border in Southern California and cover 2,650 miles before reaching the trail’s end at the Canadian border. Hikers can’t depart until California’s late spring storms are over, which leaves only six months to make it to northern Washington before the blizzards begin. Hikers need to cover more than twenty miles a day to make it in time.
Storey didn’t want to hike the trail in the first place. But her husband, a hospice director, was desperate to hike the PCT while he was in a major career transition, and Storey couldn’t bear the thought of spending six months apart. “The problem is,” she told him, “if you hike the PCT, I have to go too,” I said. “And I’m not.”
But she does, eventually won over by the promise of spending six months together on the trail, far from the demands of everyday life.
This is not a typical adventure memoir, but Storey is not typical PCT material. Most of the through hikers who tackle the 2,650 mile route each year are twenty-something males. But Storey and her husband are 56 and 52, respectively, when they decide to take on the trail; she calls her adventure her “two-thirds life crisis.”
Adventure is no under-statement. I’m a city girl, and was genuinely surprised at how harrowing their journey was: they endure summer storms, pick their way down icy slopes, encounter a mountain lion, and nearly drown crossing a river. It’s no wonder that only half of the hikers who start out each year make it to trail’s end. The hardships of the trail make a community out of the hikers, and my favorite parts of the story involve these friends and the “trail angels” who make their journey a little easier.
No spoilers here, but I wasn’t expecting Storey’s journey to unfold the way it did. 900 miles in, something unexpected occurs, and the turn of events improved my opinion of Storey–who had seemed a little self-absorbed up to that point–and the story itself.
April 11, 2013
I Promise Not to Suffer: A Fool For Love Hikes the Pacific Crest Trail (Paperback)
This is not a book about a hike so much as it is a book about a life. Having said that, I rate a book based on whether: 1) I enjoy the writing, and 2) does it provoke me to think about new ideas, and to think in new ways? Applying this standard to Gail Donahue Storey's latest book, I had to give it five stars. The writing has that quality of both Jane Austen and Janet Evanovitch, i.e., the ability to recognize the humorous aspects of life, while dealing gently with human idiosyncrasies. And because the author has both an extensive religious and philosophical background, her responses to the challenges of the adventure are unique. Her motto might be "An unexamined life is not worth living" (Socrates). I can't imagine reading this book without giving your own life a quick once-over as well.
This is not a book about a hike so much as it is a book about a life. Having said that, I rate a book based on whether: 1) I enjoy the writing, and 2) does it provoke me to think about new ideas, and to think in new ways? Applying this standard to Gail Donahue Storey's latest book, I had to give it five stars. The writing has that quality of both Jane Austen and Janet Evanovitch, i.e., the ability to recognize the humorous aspects of life, while dealing gently with human idiosyncrasies. And because the author has both an extensive religious and philosophical background, her responses to the challenges of the adventure are unique. Her motto might be "An unexamined life is not worth living" (Socrates). I can't imagine reading this book without giving your own life a quick once-over as well.
August 23, 2021
You might not know this, but I’m legally obligated to read any and all books about the PCT. The thing is, most of them aren’t that good, and this one is no exception. First off, while I may agree with the old saying about judging a book and it’s cover ... what if the cover is so dumb that you’re embarrassed to be seen with the book on public? Fortunately it’s quarantine so I’m not leaving the house anyway. I keep reading these PCT books because I have incredibly fond memories of my own PCT through hike 20 years ago and need a little nostalgia ... but it kinda ruins it when all they do is COMPLAIN about it the whole time! Look, if you don’t like walking up hills, sleeping in dirt, and eating crap food surrounded by mosquitoes ... why the hell did you decide to go hiking?! And then write a book about it??!!!! Another thing is all these books are too long. Unfortunately there’s no way to fill a 200+ page book with just stories from a thru-hike, there’s not enough source material. But 75 page books are hard to sell, so they fill the rest with the drudgery of “why they want to hike the trail” (is there anything more tedious?), the complications of their relationships, childhood memories of their alcoholic fathers ... in other words, zzzzzzzzzz
August 3, 2015
After joining our thru-hiking friends and hiking a 200 mile section of the PCT, I came home hungry for others' accounts of the PCT experience. I Promise Not To Suffer crossed my path and, although it had few positive reviews, I figured that it would at least quench a bit of my thirst for trail talk.
Gail's book is part trail experience but mostly life memoire. In the style of Wild (which I truly despised), she sorts through her past in order to make sense of her present and wonders about her post-PCT future. Luckily, when she delves into these revelations and memories, she separates these paragraph from the trail dialogue with a few spaces, making it easy to skip over them and get back to the point.
IMO, it is extremely poorly written. Her overuse of metaphor and her heavy reliance on her thesaurus made it a challenge to get through most paragraphs without rolling my eyes. Here is an example:
Save yourself the anguish. Read something else.
Gail's book is part trail experience but mostly life memoire. In the style of Wild (which I truly despised), she sorts through her past in order to make sense of her present and wonders about her post-PCT future. Luckily, when she delves into these revelations and memories, she separates these paragraph from the trail dialogue with a few spaces, making it easy to skip over them and get back to the point.
IMO, it is extremely poorly written. Her overuse of metaphor and her heavy reliance on her thesaurus made it a challenge to get through most paragraphs without rolling my eyes. Here is an example:
I rested in deep anonymity here, free as a wraith in this sleekly sensual ambience of modernist blond wood and metallic curves, aubergine sofas beneath bright abstract art.
(eye roll)
Save yourself the anguish. Read something else.
June 13, 2016
Terrible. Who goes on a six month backpacking trip to get closer to their husband? It makes about as much sense as having a baby to save a marriage. Oh, and no rain gear? Seriously?! Don't even get me started on the fact that they ran out of water purifying tablets...TWICE!
In addition, Storey did not train or prepare for such an arduous hike. At 125#, she should be able to safely carry 30-35# of gear, and she could barely manage 15-18#. It is dangerous to go into any hike ill-prepared; not only for herself, but for other hikers as well.
This wasn't a book about hiking the PCT - it was about a woman trying to write some profound memoir (missed the mark severely) about her growth as a person (I don't care), her sex life with her husband (ditto), and her path to find some sort of meaning in her life (ditto)>
Oh yeah, poorly written as well - think 6th grade.
In addition, Storey did not train or prepare for such an arduous hike. At 125#, she should be able to safely carry 30-35# of gear, and she could barely manage 15-18#. It is dangerous to go into any hike ill-prepared; not only for herself, but for other hikers as well.
This wasn't a book about hiking the PCT - it was about a woman trying to write some profound memoir (missed the mark severely) about her growth as a person (I don't care), her sex life with her husband (ditto), and her path to find some sort of meaning in her life (ditto)>
Oh yeah, poorly written as well - think 6th grade.
January 7, 2015
The Hook - The thrill of the hike, The Pacific Crest Trail, without all the equipment, bugs, heat, cold or animals stealing my food. More importantly, I Promise Not To Suffer is a Barbara Savage Memorial Award Winner. Larry Savage established this award in memory of his wife Barbara who was killed in a biking accident. I had read Barbara Savage’s Miles From Nowhere A Round-the-World Bicycle Adventure, an account of her 23,000 mile bike journey and am always looking for books that honor her memory.
The Line – “This was really living, close calls with dying included.”
The Sinker – I Promise Not To Suffer is truly fascinating. Gail D. Story has my deep respect and admiration for her attempt to hike the 2.561 relentless miles of the famous PCT. Gail Storey provides a good picture of what drives people to add this hike to their list. I could not put it down.
The opening line is telling “I NEVER MUCH CARED FOR NATURE, or rather, thought it okay as long as it stayed outside.” What compelled Gail to consider the hike? Clear and simple it is Gail's love for her husband Porter. More his dream than hers, this 56 year old woman is willing to take the leap or in this case, each step. I Promise Not To Suffer is as much about a marriage as it is the adventure of the hike.
As for that vicarious journey, this book more than delivered. I Promise Not To Suffer charts the planning and organization it takes to successfully hike for six months. It details the compiling of food, how to pack it, how to cook it, how to re-supply it; clothing, tarp or tent, each supply considered for its use and weight in the overall pack. Gail takes us along on her journey and all she requires is that we read and enjoy. We are privy to the things she sees, the people she meets, and her innermost thoughts about her life, from her husband to her relationship with her mother who is dying of cancer. Gail Storey makes her challenges interesting and writes with honesty, love and genuine wit.
I Promise Not To Suffer is a great addition to my love of adrenaline adventure and a testament to the spirit of a woman who describes herself as in the second third of her life and is not especially fit. I'm certain it will be compared to Wild by Cheryl Strayed which I have yet to read.
Last thought - What I would have given to be on the trail when she rounded the corner and saw…
The Line – “This was really living, close calls with dying included.”
The Sinker – I Promise Not To Suffer is truly fascinating. Gail D. Story has my deep respect and admiration for her attempt to hike the 2.561 relentless miles of the famous PCT. Gail Storey provides a good picture of what drives people to add this hike to their list. I could not put it down.
The opening line is telling “I NEVER MUCH CARED FOR NATURE, or rather, thought it okay as long as it stayed outside.” What compelled Gail to consider the hike? Clear and simple it is Gail's love for her husband Porter. More his dream than hers, this 56 year old woman is willing to take the leap or in this case, each step. I Promise Not To Suffer is as much about a marriage as it is the adventure of the hike.
As for that vicarious journey, this book more than delivered. I Promise Not To Suffer charts the planning and organization it takes to successfully hike for six months. It details the compiling of food, how to pack it, how to cook it, how to re-supply it; clothing, tarp or tent, each supply considered for its use and weight in the overall pack. Gail takes us along on her journey and all she requires is that we read and enjoy. We are privy to the things she sees, the people she meets, and her innermost thoughts about her life, from her husband to her relationship with her mother who is dying of cancer. Gail Storey makes her challenges interesting and writes with honesty, love and genuine wit.
I Promise Not To Suffer is a great addition to my love of adrenaline adventure and a testament to the spirit of a woman who describes herself as in the second third of her life and is not especially fit. I'm certain it will be compared to Wild by Cheryl Strayed which I have yet to read.
Last thought - What I would have given to be on the trail when she rounded the corner and saw…
February 16, 2014
Loved this book! Compared to Cheryl Strayed's Wild, I enjoyed this one more. Although I don't want to hike the PCT or the AT, I do want to do some day hikes. I love love love travel adventure books!
May 10, 2021
I would like to review this book but I cannot. Reviewing it would be like analyzing the deepest personal, intimate and philosophical center of a person. I feel as if I have spent an evening in the company of a warm friend who is gentle, generous, loving, even pure in heart but also tough, determined and realistic. I enjoyed her. I enjoyed listening to her. I understood her peaceful encounter with a mountain lion and their communication by eye contact. I understood her transformation from an urban socialite to a lover of nature and solitude. I loved her expressive way of revealing her heart in few words, as she described their enjoyment of nature as "coupled solitude" in which she and her husband were alone but together. I enjoyed her profound experience of finding deeper peace in nature as the trials of nature became more deadly.
Friendships are not meant to be analyzed and critiqued, just enjoyed. Gail became my friend. Her presence was comfortable and accepting, leaving me feeling confident that the world will continue as it should. I will not forget reading this book.
Oh, yes, the description of the trail was precise and accurate. Her list of essentials for such a trip was thorough. The camaderie of others on the trail and the helpfulness of strangers off the trail were described well. But I have read other books that have done as well in this. But when they forded ice cold streams, fell in, sometimes several times in one day, enduring soaking wet boots, or when they slid out of control down paths or sudden depressions or had to travel through the night to find shelter, the descriptions were vibrant but unexaggerated. I felt what they were feeling.
Gail has a talent in revealing people's innermost thoughts and feelings and she has an understanding of human nature that makes it possible for the reader to understand the dynamics of relationships on a trail. Most authors treat the PCT as the "main character" and perhaps protagonist. Gail makes the hikers the stars.
I am amazed that I could read a book with so much drama, pain, suffering, almost intolerable conditions, plus so much deep emotional healing of both her husband and Gail and yet feel so calm and relaxed after reading it. Both Gail and her husband worked out unresolved problems with parents, careers, employers, etc. and came to a deeper understanding of their purpose in life. But these emotional changes, even changes in their sexual relationship, were dealt with so calmly and smoothly, almost as if they were a natural process of growing, no more difficult or unexpected than a flower growing. And when situations became too "deep" or "heavy" emotionally, she relieved the situation with humor.
It is hard to put into words. Gail is not only an excellent author but an interesting person. And since she is writing about her first hand experience on the trail, we know that it is probably a more honest reflection of the PCT experience.
She was not overly dramatic in her descriptions, perhaps understating their dangerous experiences. And she never expressed an opinion about others choosing to do this trip. But, despite the other books which I have read on the PCT, only this book has subconsciously made me realize that hiking the trail from start to finish in one season is foolhardy and dangerous. Even one more small error could have been the straw that broke the camel's back and left one of them dead and the other lost and alone, suffering from a slow tortuous death. They were in borderline crises more than once in which only a split second could have made the difference between life and death. This book has reinforced my belief that nature should be enjoyed but that it must be respected. Generations ago, native Americans talked about the foolishness of Europeans determined that no storm was going to stop them. So they would fight through a storm, exhaust themselves, expend too much energy, become soaked in perspiration, and die from hypothermia or in an extreme almost inhuman effort, finally arrive at his destination. The native American would build a snow cave, keep warm, rest, conserve his energy, and patiently wait out the storm. Then he would leave for his destination under easy conditions and arrive before the European.
The lesson from this is to go with the flow, watch nature, and do not fight it. Keep in tune with its rhythm. I think this is something that they both forgot in their drive to complete 20 miles per day, come h--- or high water. This book shows the unnecessary stress they endured because they tried to "beat" nature. They gained nothing from this extended trip that could not have been accomplished by doing half the trail each summer. It was a challenge without a purpose, to finish it according to their calendar instead of according to the calendar of the seasons.
That is perhaps the one realization that I would have liked Gail to have arrived at by the end of the book. Her profound "oneness" with nature, feeling in tune with it, feeling overawed by her smallness in huge universe, somehow did not connect with what nature was saying. Not now. Wait until there is no possibility of late spring storms or early winter storms. And that is the one warning that I want to give readers who may be contemplating this trip. Do not do it in one seasson. Give yourself the freedom to take longer, sleep more, eat more, enjoy more by staying by planning around nature. Nature will not change itself for you, a wise person changes his plans instead. Sure, you can "brave" it out in a city with an approaching hurricane... or you can evacuate and return. In both cases, the effect is the same, temporary housing and displacement. But in one situation, you are prepared and in control. In the other, the hurricane is in control... Nature always wins. But it cannot win if you have removed yourself as a "player". Do not schedule a trip on the PCT. Take it day by day.
Friendships are not meant to be analyzed and critiqued, just enjoyed. Gail became my friend. Her presence was comfortable and accepting, leaving me feeling confident that the world will continue as it should. I will not forget reading this book.
Oh, yes, the description of the trail was precise and accurate. Her list of essentials for such a trip was thorough. The camaderie of others on the trail and the helpfulness of strangers off the trail were described well. But I have read other books that have done as well in this. But when they forded ice cold streams, fell in, sometimes several times in one day, enduring soaking wet boots, or when they slid out of control down paths or sudden depressions or had to travel through the night to find shelter, the descriptions were vibrant but unexaggerated. I felt what they were feeling.
Gail has a talent in revealing people's innermost thoughts and feelings and she has an understanding of human nature that makes it possible for the reader to understand the dynamics of relationships on a trail. Most authors treat the PCT as the "main character" and perhaps protagonist. Gail makes the hikers the stars.
I am amazed that I could read a book with so much drama, pain, suffering, almost intolerable conditions, plus so much deep emotional healing of both her husband and Gail and yet feel so calm and relaxed after reading it. Both Gail and her husband worked out unresolved problems with parents, careers, employers, etc. and came to a deeper understanding of their purpose in life. But these emotional changes, even changes in their sexual relationship, were dealt with so calmly and smoothly, almost as if they were a natural process of growing, no more difficult or unexpected than a flower growing. And when situations became too "deep" or "heavy" emotionally, she relieved the situation with humor.
It is hard to put into words. Gail is not only an excellent author but an interesting person. And since she is writing about her first hand experience on the trail, we know that it is probably a more honest reflection of the PCT experience.
She was not overly dramatic in her descriptions, perhaps understating their dangerous experiences. And she never expressed an opinion about others choosing to do this trip. But, despite the other books which I have read on the PCT, only this book has subconsciously made me realize that hiking the trail from start to finish in one season is foolhardy and dangerous. Even one more small error could have been the straw that broke the camel's back and left one of them dead and the other lost and alone, suffering from a slow tortuous death. They were in borderline crises more than once in which only a split second could have made the difference between life and death. This book has reinforced my belief that nature should be enjoyed but that it must be respected. Generations ago, native Americans talked about the foolishness of Europeans determined that no storm was going to stop them. So they would fight through a storm, exhaust themselves, expend too much energy, become soaked in perspiration, and die from hypothermia or in an extreme almost inhuman effort, finally arrive at his destination. The native American would build a snow cave, keep warm, rest, conserve his energy, and patiently wait out the storm. Then he would leave for his destination under easy conditions and arrive before the European.
The lesson from this is to go with the flow, watch nature, and do not fight it. Keep in tune with its rhythm. I think this is something that they both forgot in their drive to complete 20 miles per day, come h--- or high water. This book shows the unnecessary stress they endured because they tried to "beat" nature. They gained nothing from this extended trip that could not have been accomplished by doing half the trail each summer. It was a challenge without a purpose, to finish it according to their calendar instead of according to the calendar of the seasons.
That is perhaps the one realization that I would have liked Gail to have arrived at by the end of the book. Her profound "oneness" with nature, feeling in tune with it, feeling overawed by her smallness in huge universe, somehow did not connect with what nature was saying. Not now. Wait until there is no possibility of late spring storms or early winter storms. And that is the one warning that I want to give readers who may be contemplating this trip. Do not do it in one seasson. Give yourself the freedom to take longer, sleep more, eat more, enjoy more by staying by planning around nature. Nature will not change itself for you, a wise person changes his plans instead. Sure, you can "brave" it out in a city with an approaching hurricane... or you can evacuate and return. In both cases, the effect is the same, temporary housing and displacement. But in one situation, you are prepared and in control. In the other, the hurricane is in control... Nature always wins. But it cannot win if you have removed yourself as a "player". Do not schedule a trip on the PCT. Take it day by day.
October 4, 2019
For some reason, I always enjoy a book about huge physical challenges. This could be because I have never attempted anything so massive and exciting. This was the memoir of Gail Storey, who hiked the Pacific Crest Trail with her husband Porter. Although she was forced to leave the trail due to exhaustion after hiking nearly 1,000 miles, her husband Porter continued to the end. Her story of the incredible journey for both of them was extremely interesting, and I have nothing but admiration for anyone ho could do what she did. Also, she was fifty six years old. Amazing and courageous!
February 27, 2013
I know this book is great, because Gail was in my writing group when she wrote it. Still, I can't wait to read it between covers. The book is funny, insightful, and full of fabulous descriptions of the PCT. We get to go along as a marriage evolves, through changes as drastic as the literal ones, from exhilarating heights to frigid lows. Ultimately what we get is a picture of long-term, committed love and how, with dedication, resourcefulness and two wide-open hearts, it can extend to everyone it meets along the trail.
August 12, 2013
This book had all the makings for a good summer read: an adventure hike across the storied Pacific Crest Trail (PCT), scenes in California and Oregon, a married couple embarking on the journey (interesting to me as most accounts are solo treks). It was even on the local bestsellers list at the Boulder bookstore. Surely I'd fall in love with this book, transported to the trail as I flipped the pages on my lunch break. Instead, I found myself exasperated.
Gail and I could never be friends in real life; I found it impossible to relate to her. She's flakey and needy, and even admits she is a drama queen. I question why she went on the hike in the first place. In a nutshell, she hikes the PCT with her husband Porter, not because she wants to be with him, but because she can't stand to be without him.
In I Promise Not to Suffer (IPNTS) she writes about how she is so skinny (yet well endowed), was such a "bad girl" back in the day, how she was an "object of desire", and drama with her past lovers. But now she is healed since she has met the oh so dreamy Porter. Not a chapter goes by that she doesn't remind us how much she needs him. These bits are as eye-rolling and palm-to-forehead-slapping as you can imagine. Overly Cheesy, she tries too hard and it cheapens it.
An example:
I'm not making this up. It goes on like this much of the book: the whole struggle that she can't bear to stay, yet can't bear to leave her beloved. The codependency issue gets old.
She also says things like:
Sigh.
I could have done without the parts about her monastery experience and Buddhist farm retreat, which I felt lent nothing to the story.
At one point—with no one to bear witness—she meets a mountain lion on the path. I could not help but feel that she made this up for attention and drama.
The characters she meets along the trail are hardly anything more than a laundry list of trail names (names given to hikers by other hikers along the trail). There is one other couple we read about a few times in the book, but even they are vague. None of the characters were fleshed out, not even her husband (whom we never got to know beyond: he makes all their own lightweight gear, he is a top hospice and palliative medicine doctor, and he is obviously extremely understanding and patient).
She does a good job with accurately naming all the plants, flowers, mountain features, and other sights along the trail (crest-lined saddle, brushy chaparral of sagebrush), however they are mostly in list format. I struggled to visualize how the trail really felt as the descriptions did not render deeper.
Compared to other trail memoirs, such as Bill Bryson's A Walk in the Woods (about hiking the Appalachian Trail), IPNTS didn't transport me to the trail experience.
She does redeem her writing with the final 37 pages, when she is "off" the trail. The writing was less annoying. It touches on a serious personal issue, and seemed to be written from the heart.
I'm also impressed at the mileage she hiked, something to be admired.
In the end, the negatives outweighed the positives for me.
I have Cheryl Strayed's Wild on my to-read list, which is a another recent PCT thru-hiker book. After reading IPNTS, I am hoping that Wild is nothing like it.
Gail and I could never be friends in real life; I found it impossible to relate to her. She's flakey and needy, and even admits she is a drama queen. I question why she went on the hike in the first place. In a nutshell, she hikes the PCT with her husband Porter, not because she wants to be with him, but because she can't stand to be without him.
In I Promise Not to Suffer (IPNTS) she writes about how she is so skinny (yet well endowed), was such a "bad girl" back in the day, how she was an "object of desire", and drama with her past lovers. But now she is healed since she has met the oh so dreamy Porter. Not a chapter goes by that she doesn't remind us how much she needs him. These bits are as eye-rolling and palm-to-forehead-slapping as you can imagine. Overly Cheesy, she tries too hard and it cheapens it.
An example:
"Porter and I went back to our trailer. He held me, and we made vulnerable, tender love.
"How can I bear to leave you," I asked, "if I leave the trail?"
He stroked strands of hair from my face. "If you need me to, I'll leave too."
He loved me that much? Did I love him enough to let him go on without me?
I'm not making this up. It goes on like this much of the book: the whole struggle that she can't bear to stay, yet can't bear to leave her beloved. The codependency issue gets old.
She also says things like:
"I tried to pare myself down to an essential self before I married Porter, . . ."
Sigh.
I could have done without the parts about her monastery experience and Buddhist farm retreat, which I felt lent nothing to the story.
At one point—with no one to bear witness—she meets a mountain lion on the path. I could not help but feel that she made this up for attention and drama.
The characters she meets along the trail are hardly anything more than a laundry list of trail names (names given to hikers by other hikers along the trail). There is one other couple we read about a few times in the book, but even they are vague. None of the characters were fleshed out, not even her husband (whom we never got to know beyond: he makes all their own lightweight gear, he is a top hospice and palliative medicine doctor, and he is obviously extremely understanding and patient).
She does a good job with accurately naming all the plants, flowers, mountain features, and other sights along the trail (crest-lined saddle, brushy chaparral of sagebrush), however they are mostly in list format. I struggled to visualize how the trail really felt as the descriptions did not render deeper.
Compared to other trail memoirs, such as Bill Bryson's A Walk in the Woods (about hiking the Appalachian Trail), IPNTS didn't transport me to the trail experience.
She does redeem her writing with the final 37 pages, when she is "off" the trail. The writing was less annoying. It touches on a serious personal issue, and seemed to be written from the heart.
I'm also impressed at the mileage she hiked, something to be admired.
In the end, the negatives outweighed the positives for me.
I have Cheryl Strayed's Wild on my to-read list, which is a another recent PCT thru-hiker book. After reading IPNTS, I am hoping that Wild is nothing like it.
August 31, 2013
This memoir, I Promise Not To Suffer, tracks the 2,663 miles Storey and her husband attempt to hike – the Pacific Crest Trail – over a 6 month period. Often times the PCT tales seem like a vehicle for Storey to mostly write about her life, specifically her past transgressions and complicated relationships. She cleverly intertwines the two topics and I think she pulls it off.
“I never cared much for nature, or rather, thought it okay as long as it stayed outside.” That is how the book starts out, really setting the tone. My first thought was, “she’ll never make it.” My second thought was, “she must really love her husband.” See, this was all his idea, the outdoorsman that he is, and she just tags along on the hike over mountainous terrain from Mexico to Canada. Anything for love! I suspected from the beginning that she likes nature more than she lets on, but let’s just say she is not the typical PCT hiker (young, male, fond of camping).
Living in Palm Springs, CA, I was so excited for Storey and husband, Porter, to hike into my town. They got pretty close, tromping through one of my favorite vacation escapes of Idyllwild. She even mentioned walking through the wind farm, which I can see from my street. The sound they release is quite overwhelming up close… the whomp whomp whomp…. I read most of this book lying in a hammock in my backyard, my view the stunning San Jacinto mountains, which Storey had conquered.
This fact made it easy for me to sink into the book and appreciate how difficult the hike must be. These mountains are unforgiving and dangerous with super slippy footing. The climate is extreme, ranging from snow to blistering heat. And they are just the beginning… hello High Sierras and Cascade Range! Though Storey keeps the tales of the trails pretty upbeat and distracts with her life musings, I know it must have been a real bear… or mountain lion.
Porter, a hospice doctor, resigns from his job and the couple sell their house, along with some belongings to fund this 6 month hike. The word that comes to mind here is courageous, but they both needed the hike to regroup. Porter worked hard researching, buying and even crafting the most lightweight gear he could. When you are hiking 20 miles a day, the lighter the pack the better. They didn’t even bring a tent! *gasp face* That would be a deal breaker for me. I found the amount of planning and thought that goes into this hike to be fascinating. I also loved learning about the trail etiquette and found the camaraderie of fellow hikers to be really something special.
I consider myself pretty outdoorsy but if my husband suggested hiking the PCT, well, it would be one short conversation ending with a big no… or maybe now I would consider it when the kids are grown. If Gail can do it, so can I! I think…The scariest part for me is not the physical exhaustion, though that would be rough, but the mental exhaustion and all that time to think. Storey struggles with this as well, really getting into her own head. Though I imagine hiking is much like writing for her, in that it can be very cathartic, so she is able to sort some things out.
I recommend I Promise Not to Suffer: A Fool For Love Hikes the Pacific Crest Trail I Promise Not To Suffer by Gail Storey {book review} read outdoors mom hike camping book , the perfect length for the Labor Day Weekend by the pool or in the sand. You will find Storey to be quite adorable and relatable. While she takes you on her incredible journey across the PCT, she herself takes another journey, a personal one in which she explores her marriage, her relationship with her dying mother and her past (and a deep-seeded questioning of choices she made as a young woman…which I can totally relate to). It is an easy read that has a great flow. Storey writes effortlessly and allows her great personality to shine through the cracks. In the end I was rooting for not only Gail and Porter but love in general. Team LOVE!
“I never cared much for nature, or rather, thought it okay as long as it stayed outside.” That is how the book starts out, really setting the tone. My first thought was, “she’ll never make it.” My second thought was, “she must really love her husband.” See, this was all his idea, the outdoorsman that he is, and she just tags along on the hike over mountainous terrain from Mexico to Canada. Anything for love! I suspected from the beginning that she likes nature more than she lets on, but let’s just say she is not the typical PCT hiker (young, male, fond of camping).
Living in Palm Springs, CA, I was so excited for Storey and husband, Porter, to hike into my town. They got pretty close, tromping through one of my favorite vacation escapes of Idyllwild. She even mentioned walking through the wind farm, which I can see from my street. The sound they release is quite overwhelming up close… the whomp whomp whomp…. I read most of this book lying in a hammock in my backyard, my view the stunning San Jacinto mountains, which Storey had conquered.
This fact made it easy for me to sink into the book and appreciate how difficult the hike must be. These mountains are unforgiving and dangerous with super slippy footing. The climate is extreme, ranging from snow to blistering heat. And they are just the beginning… hello High Sierras and Cascade Range! Though Storey keeps the tales of the trails pretty upbeat and distracts with her life musings, I know it must have been a real bear… or mountain lion.
Porter, a hospice doctor, resigns from his job and the couple sell their house, along with some belongings to fund this 6 month hike. The word that comes to mind here is courageous, but they both needed the hike to regroup. Porter worked hard researching, buying and even crafting the most lightweight gear he could. When you are hiking 20 miles a day, the lighter the pack the better. They didn’t even bring a tent! *gasp face* That would be a deal breaker for me. I found the amount of planning and thought that goes into this hike to be fascinating. I also loved learning about the trail etiquette and found the camaraderie of fellow hikers to be really something special.
I consider myself pretty outdoorsy but if my husband suggested hiking the PCT, well, it would be one short conversation ending with a big no… or maybe now I would consider it when the kids are grown. If Gail can do it, so can I! I think…The scariest part for me is not the physical exhaustion, though that would be rough, but the mental exhaustion and all that time to think. Storey struggles with this as well, really getting into her own head. Though I imagine hiking is much like writing for her, in that it can be very cathartic, so she is able to sort some things out.
I recommend I Promise Not to Suffer: A Fool For Love Hikes the Pacific Crest Trail I Promise Not To Suffer by Gail Storey {book review} read outdoors mom hike camping book , the perfect length for the Labor Day Weekend by the pool or in the sand. You will find Storey to be quite adorable and relatable. While she takes you on her incredible journey across the PCT, she herself takes another journey, a personal one in which she explores her marriage, her relationship with her dying mother and her past (and a deep-seeded questioning of choices she made as a young woman…which I can totally relate to). It is an easy read that has a great flow. Storey writes effortlessly and allows her great personality to shine through the cracks. In the end I was rooting for not only Gail and Porter but love in general. Team LOVE!
May 23, 2017
As a retired college English professor who appreciates good writing, I was very pleased to discover Gail Storey’s I Promise Not to Suffer. It’s a literary gem that succeeds on multiple levels. At the physical level it gives the reader a vicarious experience of hiking 900 miles on the Pacific Crest Trail. It describes—in rich, precise prose—the beauty of changing landscapes and the effort required to hike, with a heavy pack, through extremes of climate and terrain. At the psychological and spiritual level, it details the narrator’s progress in mindfulness as she learns to surrender to the moment and accept the natural world as it is. Her opening line tells us she has not always been comfortable with things as they are: “I never much cared for Nature, or rather, thought it okay as long as it stayed outside.” At the beginning of her hike, she finds much to complain about because the natural world is not as she wants it to be. By the end of her hike she accepts the natural world as it is.
In the chapter “What’s the Meaning of your Pilgrimage,” at a moment of exhaustion and clarity on the trail, she describes the before and after states this way: “I was still alive, but oddly more so than before. Mist rose from the lake and I saw through it as if through myself, through light, air, flowers, trees. Beetles and ants scurried in the dirt and joined us in our silence. It seemed so long ago I believed they were out to get me, that dirt would kill me, that heat, cold, water, and ice were problems to overcome. I’d come so far, these nearly nine hundred miles” (168). In this moment of acceptance and transcendence, she feels at one with Nature.
Though she had to drop out of the hike shortly after this epiphany (her husband continued on), she returned to her Houston apartment as a person changed by the spirit of acceptance. She discovers the she has opened up to a new level of selfless love: “At a loss with myself, I felt soft with others. Everyday kindnesses came easily—helping a neighbor carry groceries from her car to her apartment, righting an overturned plant in the hallway, kneeling down to speak with a child. Like sun warming cold mountain air, fierce tenderness pervaded the air we breathed” (175). When she learned that her mother had taken a turn for the worse with lung cancer, the author finds she has finally shed the emotions that formerly made her relationship with her mother difficult: “I loved her as she was. I saw her quietude as softness now, instead of distance. She was as much a mystery to me as she had always been. But initiated into mystery—by my strange peace at not completing the trail, by the unfathomable love within and around us, I loved the mystery itself. It drew me close to Mother Earth, my mother, Nature, my own nature’” (178). This is as good a way as any to describe the mystery of achieving stillness and harmony with the universe at it is, the goal of mindfulness. After reading this book I found a clear statement of this theme in Suzuki Roshi’s book, A Beginner’s Guide to Meditation: “The purpose of studying Buddhism is to study ourselves and to forget ourselves. When we forget ourselves, we actually are the true activity of the big existence, or reality itself. When we realize this fact, there is no problem whatsoever in this world, and we can enjoy our life without feeling any difficulties. The purpose of our practice is to be aware of this fact.”
In this book, Gail Storey makes hiking the PCT a literary symbol for overcoming obstacles and coming to terms with one’s self and one’s place in the universe, a very high-order literary challenge. She develops and employs this symbol with consummate skill. I Promise is a deep and powerful narrative, beautifully thought out and beautifully crafted. Highly recommended for anyone interested in the PCT or in mindfulness.
In the chapter “What’s the Meaning of your Pilgrimage,” at a moment of exhaustion and clarity on the trail, she describes the before and after states this way: “I was still alive, but oddly more so than before. Mist rose from the lake and I saw through it as if through myself, through light, air, flowers, trees. Beetles and ants scurried in the dirt and joined us in our silence. It seemed so long ago I believed they were out to get me, that dirt would kill me, that heat, cold, water, and ice were problems to overcome. I’d come so far, these nearly nine hundred miles” (168). In this moment of acceptance and transcendence, she feels at one with Nature.
Though she had to drop out of the hike shortly after this epiphany (her husband continued on), she returned to her Houston apartment as a person changed by the spirit of acceptance. She discovers the she has opened up to a new level of selfless love: “At a loss with myself, I felt soft with others. Everyday kindnesses came easily—helping a neighbor carry groceries from her car to her apartment, righting an overturned plant in the hallway, kneeling down to speak with a child. Like sun warming cold mountain air, fierce tenderness pervaded the air we breathed” (175). When she learned that her mother had taken a turn for the worse with lung cancer, the author finds she has finally shed the emotions that formerly made her relationship with her mother difficult: “I loved her as she was. I saw her quietude as softness now, instead of distance. She was as much a mystery to me as she had always been. But initiated into mystery—by my strange peace at not completing the trail, by the unfathomable love within and around us, I loved the mystery itself. It drew me close to Mother Earth, my mother, Nature, my own nature’” (178). This is as good a way as any to describe the mystery of achieving stillness and harmony with the universe at it is, the goal of mindfulness. After reading this book I found a clear statement of this theme in Suzuki Roshi’s book, A Beginner’s Guide to Meditation: “The purpose of studying Buddhism is to study ourselves and to forget ourselves. When we forget ourselves, we actually are the true activity of the big existence, or reality itself. When we realize this fact, there is no problem whatsoever in this world, and we can enjoy our life without feeling any difficulties. The purpose of our practice is to be aware of this fact.”
In this book, Gail Storey makes hiking the PCT a literary symbol for overcoming obstacles and coming to terms with one’s self and one’s place in the universe, a very high-order literary challenge. She develops and employs this symbol with consummate skill. I Promise is a deep and powerful narrative, beautifully thought out and beautifully crafted. Highly recommended for anyone interested in the PCT or in mindfulness.
June 14, 2013
If you enjoyed Wild by Cheryl Strayed or Eat, Pray, Love by Elizabeth Gilbert, I've got another memoir to recommend: I Promise Not To Suffer: A Fool For Love Hikes The Pacific Crest Trail (Mountaineers Books, 2013) by Gail D. Storey. For many years the author was a customer at the West University Branch of Harris County Public Library where I worked. Gail, once a librarian herself, wrote two hilarious novels set in Houston featuring a fictional librarian: The Lord's Motel and God's Country Club, originally published in the 1990s, were both reissued in paperback by Persea in 2011.We always carried multiple copies of her novels at my library. I remember when Gail was the featured cover girl on an issue of Library Journal. Gail was known for showing up at her readings and other events wearing a wedding dress or other fun costumes. I often spotted Gail and her tall, handsome husband Porter Storey, MD riding around town on their tandem bicycle before they moved to Colorado. I was glad to learn she had a memoir coming out, and then that the book won the Barbara Savage Miles From Nowhere Memorial Award (for compelling accounts of personal journeys and outdoor adventures).
Gail and her husband, who is at in impasse in his life as a hospice doc, decide to hike the Pacific Crest Trail. Although Gail has survived two cross-country bicycle rides with Porter, she does not consider herself a hiker or even a nature lover. Gail adores her husband. They have been married seventeen years. Porter's son has left the nest. Porter becomes obsessed with buying or creating the best lightweight gear for their hike. Gail has many pangs about committing to the hike. Her mother's life is winding down and she knows they have unfinished business. But she can not imagine being separated from her husband/soulmate.
"Who am I?" is a question both she and Porter feel compelled to examine. As explained by Gail, "The older we grew, the deeper the question plunged." And so they take off. With the sure feet of a gifted writer, Gail moves expertly between her back story (including spiritual and philosophical segues) and life on the trail. As for her actual feet as well as the rest of her body, forget about it -- the hike is pure torture. Extreme temperatures, snakes, tumbles onto hard ground, drought are just some of the trials they will face. The hike is 2,543 miles long and they plan on covering 20 miles a day. A friend in Houston mails their food and medical supplies to their designated stops, often primitive campgrounds or makeshift trailers bustling with much younger hikers. Will they make it? I'm not going to tell you... Will they survive the hike? That I will tell you -- YES and YES, with much wisdom and kismet. You have to read it. This is such an intimate portrait of marriage, perhaps even more so than the story of a hike. Gail shares heart, soul, spirit and body. Thus, my heart, soul, spirit and body ached and danced alongside the rocky way.
I also have to add, that like Gail, I just recently lost my mother. Insights into death and dying from both Gail and Porter's lives made this an especially timely read. Namaste, Gail -- thank you for forging this trail of words and wonder.
text of this review comes from my blog:http://speedoflight-lonestarlibrarian...
Gail and her husband, who is at in impasse in his life as a hospice doc, decide to hike the Pacific Crest Trail. Although Gail has survived two cross-country bicycle rides with Porter, she does not consider herself a hiker or even a nature lover. Gail adores her husband. They have been married seventeen years. Porter's son has left the nest. Porter becomes obsessed with buying or creating the best lightweight gear for their hike. Gail has many pangs about committing to the hike. Her mother's life is winding down and she knows they have unfinished business. But she can not imagine being separated from her husband/soulmate.
"Who am I?" is a question both she and Porter feel compelled to examine. As explained by Gail, "The older we grew, the deeper the question plunged." And so they take off. With the sure feet of a gifted writer, Gail moves expertly between her back story (including spiritual and philosophical segues) and life on the trail. As for her actual feet as well as the rest of her body, forget about it -- the hike is pure torture. Extreme temperatures, snakes, tumbles onto hard ground, drought are just some of the trials they will face. The hike is 2,543 miles long and they plan on covering 20 miles a day. A friend in Houston mails their food and medical supplies to their designated stops, often primitive campgrounds or makeshift trailers bustling with much younger hikers. Will they make it? I'm not going to tell you... Will they survive the hike? That I will tell you -- YES and YES, with much wisdom and kismet. You have to read it. This is such an intimate portrait of marriage, perhaps even more so than the story of a hike. Gail shares heart, soul, spirit and body. Thus, my heart, soul, spirit and body ached and danced alongside the rocky way.
I also have to add, that like Gail, I just recently lost my mother. Insights into death and dying from both Gail and Porter's lives made this an especially timely read. Namaste, Gail -- thank you for forging this trail of words and wonder.
text of this review comes from my blog:http://speedoflight-lonestarlibrarian...
June 14, 2016
I admire the stamina it took for the author to hike 900 miles of the Pacific Crest Trail and for her husband to complete it was incredible. The author and her husband (a doctor), in their mid fifties, pursue the husbands dream of hiking the PCT with him making most of the ultra light equipment to take on the hike. I had problems with some of the things in the book, i.e. the author washing her hair and shirt in a spring fed area of the hike where water was precious. Also, in their attempt to go ultralight, they went with a tarp and ground cover which worked in the warmer temps but when they got into the snow fields, it didn't make sense - a little more weight with proper equipment would have kept them warmer. Also, it seemed like Porter totally expected Gail to fail, even, at one point saying he wanted to hike alone. The author has excellent descriptions of the trail, nature, etc. as well as her feelings of anxiety over her Mother's health was something many of us can relate too. What I feel prevented this from being a great read was the drama of their personal lives was over the top.
March 25, 2013
For hikers, lovers, lovers of hikers and anyone who has gone - or endeavors to go - into the wilderness in search of themselves.
As I finished I Promise Not to Suffer, my flight into Denver began its initial descent. I was trapped in my seat and sobbing into my cocktail napkin! I exchanged glances with the woman seated next to me and told her it's the best memoir I've read in a long time; rousing, funny and touching. She wrote down the title and author--she said it sounds like a great candidate for her book club.
I loved this book!
As I finished I Promise Not to Suffer, my flight into Denver began its initial descent. I was trapped in my seat and sobbing into my cocktail napkin! I exchanged glances with the woman seated next to me and told her it's the best memoir I've read in a long time; rousing, funny and touching. She wrote down the title and author--she said it sounds like a great candidate for her book club.
I loved this book!
July 6, 2018
File under yet another "woman hikes PCT" book that is much better than Strayed's. (See also "Girl in the Woods".) This was wonderful. I love these kinds of stories. I didn't expect to love the writing quite so much, somehow. I could see being a bit "woo-woo" and off-putting to some, but it fit with the subject matter. Highly recommend.
January 18, 2018
It wasn't so much about hiking the PCT as it was about how spectacularly in love she and her husband are.
May 10, 2021
Gail Storey reveals the depth that can be found within oneself and their partner on a journey of the soul. She attempted to hike the PCT, because she couldn't stand to be without her husband and he wanted to hike because he was having a crisis of purpose. Storey's candor about her lack of knowledge and reliance on her husband is relatable-- but over time she finds her own reasons to be on the trail. She discovers strength and independence and a love for the outdoors that she didn't know she was looking for. She also beautifully illustrates the way the trail brings up our most latent insecurities and forces us to understand ourselves through every lens.
I read this entire book aloud with my partner, who has never much been interested in thru-hiking, and it lit a fire in both of us. To share an adventure and know each other in a new way. SO much love for Gail and Porter-- who inspire couples of all ages to continue to learn and grow in love.
I read this entire book aloud with my partner, who has never much been interested in thru-hiking, and it lit a fire in both of us. To share an adventure and know each other in a new way. SO much love for Gail and Porter-- who inspire couples of all ages to continue to learn and grow in love.
March 9, 2018
Ever since I read Wild by Cheryl Strayed and enjoyed it (well, most of it), I have looked for books about people who have thru-hiked the Pacific Crest Trail and/or the Appalachian Trail. Every time I did a search, I Promise Not to Suffer would pop up. Now, I have a thing about titles. Once in a while, an author finds an absolutely perfect title, or (very occasionally) I will find a perfect title when I am writing, and it is like the perfect bow on top of a gift. I found this title so unappealing, however, that I resolved never to read the book. But it kept nagging at me. What did she mean - I promise not to suffer? It seems such a strange thing to say. So, finally, I broke down and got the book from my local library because 1) I just had to find out what she meant and 2) our library does not have many books about hiking either trail, so there isn't a lot of choice.
As it turns out, this title is actually perfect for describing this book. The author is indeed a fool for love, since she is not physically suited - or at least not prepared - for a thru-hike of this magnitude (2,500+ miles), yet she chooses to go anyway because she doesn't want to be without her husband for six months (why don't you talk to some military wives, Gail D. Storey?). This, after she had previously begun to hike the Appalachian Trail with her husband, which is also more than 2,000 miles in length, yet she gave up after only a couple of hundred miles. She knew hiking was not something that she was really suited for. She knew it was something her husband really, really wanted to do. She also knew that because of her previous failure on the Appalachian Trail, her husband would be worried about her the entire way.
And that pretty well sums up Gail D. Storey's character. Self-centered, self-delusional, a self-made martyr whose dramatic declaration that she "would not suffer" was something she could not, in reality, promise. After 900 miles and a 22-pound weight loss, leaving her 5'7" frame at 103 pounds, she finally realized that she simply could not go any further. She left the trail and went back home to Houston while her husband continued hiking and finished a couple of months later. By leaving, Storey was able to be with her mother during her last days, as she died of metastatic breast cancer. She was also able to facilitate her husband's offer and acceptance of a new job. Turns out she was actually much more useful and productive off the trail, as she also packed supply boxes for her husband and sent them to various supply centers along the way.
She also went back to the PCT and did some short hikes with her husband, driving to the next trail stop and meeting him for "conjugal visits," as she called them.
I honestly don't see how this book won the Barbara Savage Miles From Nowhere Memorial Award. Perhaps because Storey felt obligated to name almost every plant, tree, and animal that they saw along the way? Because the judges felt sorry for her when she had to ford stream after stream of icy-cold water, kept falling through the snow and having to be rescued constantly by her husband, or simply because she put her life at risk to do something that she really didn't want to do (no matter how many times she said how much she loved being on the trail)? Several hikers died during the same year that she and her husband were on the PCT, but she does not mention a single name of anyone who died. Don't they deserve to be memorialized?
Honestly, in my opinion, the only award this book should win is "Stupidest Title of the Year or Perhaps Decade or Maybe Even Century."
As it turns out, this title is actually perfect for describing this book. The author is indeed a fool for love, since she is not physically suited - or at least not prepared - for a thru-hike of this magnitude (2,500+ miles), yet she chooses to go anyway because she doesn't want to be without her husband for six months (why don't you talk to some military wives, Gail D. Storey?). This, after she had previously begun to hike the Appalachian Trail with her husband, which is also more than 2,000 miles in length, yet she gave up after only a couple of hundred miles. She knew hiking was not something that she was really suited for. She knew it was something her husband really, really wanted to do. She also knew that because of her previous failure on the Appalachian Trail, her husband would be worried about her the entire way.
And that pretty well sums up Gail D. Storey's character. Self-centered, self-delusional, a self-made martyr whose dramatic declaration that she "would not suffer" was something she could not, in reality, promise. After 900 miles and a 22-pound weight loss, leaving her 5'7" frame at 103 pounds, she finally realized that she simply could not go any further. She left the trail and went back home to Houston while her husband continued hiking and finished a couple of months later. By leaving, Storey was able to be with her mother during her last days, as she died of metastatic breast cancer. She was also able to facilitate her husband's offer and acceptance of a new job. Turns out she was actually much more useful and productive off the trail, as she also packed supply boxes for her husband and sent them to various supply centers along the way.
She also went back to the PCT and did some short hikes with her husband, driving to the next trail stop and meeting him for "conjugal visits," as she called them.
I honestly don't see how this book won the Barbara Savage Miles From Nowhere Memorial Award. Perhaps because Storey felt obligated to name almost every plant, tree, and animal that they saw along the way? Because the judges felt sorry for her when she had to ford stream after stream of icy-cold water, kept falling through the snow and having to be rescued constantly by her husband, or simply because she put her life at risk to do something that she really didn't want to do (no matter how many times she said how much she loved being on the trail)? Several hikers died during the same year that she and her husband were on the PCT, but she does not mention a single name of anyone who died. Don't they deserve to be memorialized?
Honestly, in my opinion, the only award this book should win is "Stupidest Title of the Year or Perhaps Decade or Maybe Even Century."
April 17, 2013
Gail Storey
Here's a grand adventure in what it really is to be human. The stage is set. Early spring, remote southern California at the Mexico border. The characters have been cast. Highly-driven hospice-hubbie, Porter and supportive wife, Gail who wants him to herself for a change. But the script has been lost, blown away in the hot, dry desert winds. The characters set out, thinking they know one another and why they are there, taking on the mighty Pacific Crest Trail.
Their well-educated selves and comfortable lives of privilege have a back-Storey. Porter's parents have never expressed awe or support of his soul-searching and formidable life undertakings. He is possessed. Gail grew up a good Catholic girl with an unpredictably violent alcoholic father, the family eventually paying a price to get out when her mother moves them to the projects. Indeed, the stage is set. Objects in the mirror are closer than they appear.
Lao Tzu was part way there with; The journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step. The 2600+ mile PCT begins with months of planning and conditioning. Then all control is lost when you hit the trail, the only dependable elements being a mapped route of intent and the bi-weekly resupply packages they've set up along the way. But the real journey is in the heart and soul of each of them; an existential existence which they can't share.
While her mother was dying of cancer and somewhat distant in all respects, Gail agreed to join Porter for the six months from Mexico to Canada. Their mettle and (methinks)their marriage are on the line. On one level, what they experience is blistering heat and icy river crossings, enduring dehydration, hypothermia, falls and injuries with their attendant chronic pain, scary weight-loss, parasitic swarms of mosquitoes(NO tent, to save weight), fear and self-doubt, snowstorms high in the Sierra, Mohave rattlesnakes, mice crawling on their faces in sleep and eating their few belongings, morale-battering younger hikers overtaking them, weeks too filthy even for sex and a close encounter with a mountain lion. A lot of physical misery and psychological challenge. Phew! But it's not what it appears.
Even this safe and dry hiker(moi) was feeling the deep bone ache, craving a hot shower, dry clothes, a soft mattress and a pot of homemade stew while reading. I was often taken back in my own mind to a conference I attended in Montreal in the 90s called Healing: Beyond Suffering and Death, keynoted by the Dalai Llama. Pain is inevitable. Suffering is optional. That week made quite an impression and set me on a new path, though I still have a long way to go. The Pacific Crest Trail was Gail and Porter Storey's long path; decades of learning squeezed into the pressure cooker of months under duress. It's where the rubber met the road, or the trail, as it were for them. My point is simply that Gail Storey generously shares herself and you will find yourself vicariously challenged.
Gail had no real idea of what she signed up for, but she unflinchingly shares her heaven and hell, doing it with with style and a sometimes outrageous sense of humor. You've got to either fall in love with her for her spirit and determination or write her off as nuts. This was not HER dream. I fell in love with her. The question became for me: Can she trust enough to do this for herself?
August 26, 2013
Have you ever wondered what it would be like to hike with your spouse? What about doing it for six months? Just contemplating the idea blows me away. Of course, it is currently not an option for me for a multitude of reasons, but it was fun to let my mind wander that direction, ponder what that might be like and get lost in someone else's adventure.
In this book, "I Promise Not to Suffer: A Fool for Love Hikes the Pacific Crest Trail", Gail Storey shares her experience as she sets out to hike the 2,663 mile Pacific Crest Trail from Southern California to Canada with her husband. The ordeals, joys, obstacles and adventures of the pair on their journey are shared in blatant detail.
The first chapter ends with a paragraph that sets the stage for the rest of the book. It reads:
"All I knew for sure was that I loved him. I've never ben able to explain it, even to myself. I came into his presence and never left. He's mountain-man buff, and at six feet two inches, just a head taller than I am, so our bodies fit perfectly. When he holds me, light-boned against his sculpted muscles, I know I'm being held. No matter how deeply I look into his gray-green eyes, I never touch bottom. Ah, my soul said when we first met, aaahhh."
That sentiment holds fast through the many adventures this couple undertakes. Through blazing heat, blizzards, near-death experiences, emotional mood swings, difficult decisions and seemingly insurmountable obstacles, these two stick together. I was amazed at their story, cried when things got really hard and didn't turn out as they had hoped, cheered when they met their goals and was thrilled at the end of their journey.
For the most part, this book was wonderful. The characters, both main and secondary, were real, and full of life. The adventure took turns both expected and unexpected. I found it heartening how willing the author was to share both her inner triumphs and struggles as well as the struggles between the couple. Having briefly pondered the undertaking portrayed in this book, I did not considered the impact and undertaking such as this would have on an individual's personal introspection and self-evaluation OR the interaction and relationship between husband and wife.
There were a few small things I found personally disappointing. The author fails to censor herself and semi-frequently shares inappropriate language. There are always ways to express your frustration, fear and such without foul language. The book is not heavily laced with such language, but it is present. Second, the author shares intimate details about her sexual encounters, both before and within the marriage, as well as before and during the couple's adventure. In my opinion, it was "too much information" and was not necessary to advance the storyline.
Is this a book I would recommend others read? Absolutely. I think it would be appropriate for married couples to read together and discuss, for book clubs to dive into, and definitely for individuals considering taking on a challenge similar to this. If you love hiking or biking, this book is for you. If you have a major adventure on your bucket list, I would recommend reading this book all the way through and doing some self-reflection to determine if your heart's desire is really a possibility.
In this book, "I Promise Not to Suffer: A Fool for Love Hikes the Pacific Crest Trail", Gail Storey shares her experience as she sets out to hike the 2,663 mile Pacific Crest Trail from Southern California to Canada with her husband. The ordeals, joys, obstacles and adventures of the pair on their journey are shared in blatant detail.
The first chapter ends with a paragraph that sets the stage for the rest of the book. It reads:
"All I knew for sure was that I loved him. I've never ben able to explain it, even to myself. I came into his presence and never left. He's mountain-man buff, and at six feet two inches, just a head taller than I am, so our bodies fit perfectly. When he holds me, light-boned against his sculpted muscles, I know I'm being held. No matter how deeply I look into his gray-green eyes, I never touch bottom. Ah, my soul said when we first met, aaahhh."
That sentiment holds fast through the many adventures this couple undertakes. Through blazing heat, blizzards, near-death experiences, emotional mood swings, difficult decisions and seemingly insurmountable obstacles, these two stick together. I was amazed at their story, cried when things got really hard and didn't turn out as they had hoped, cheered when they met their goals and was thrilled at the end of their journey.
For the most part, this book was wonderful. The characters, both main and secondary, were real, and full of life. The adventure took turns both expected and unexpected. I found it heartening how willing the author was to share both her inner triumphs and struggles as well as the struggles between the couple. Having briefly pondered the undertaking portrayed in this book, I did not considered the impact and undertaking such as this would have on an individual's personal introspection and self-evaluation OR the interaction and relationship between husband and wife.
There were a few small things I found personally disappointing. The author fails to censor herself and semi-frequently shares inappropriate language. There are always ways to express your frustration, fear and such without foul language. The book is not heavily laced with such language, but it is present. Second, the author shares intimate details about her sexual encounters, both before and within the marriage, as well as before and during the couple's adventure. In my opinion, it was "too much information" and was not necessary to advance the storyline.
Is this a book I would recommend others read? Absolutely. I think it would be appropriate for married couples to read together and discuss, for book clubs to dive into, and definitely for individuals considering taking on a challenge similar to this. If you love hiking or biking, this book is for you. If you have a major adventure on your bucket list, I would recommend reading this book all the way through and doing some self-reflection to determine if your heart's desire is really a possibility.
August 29, 2013
I just read the best book. It's called I Promise Not to Suffer by Gail Storey, and this is one of those that could totally be me kind of books. Gail is this adorable we-could-totally-be-neighbors kind of gal who, like me, loves routine and stability. As life goes on, her world was turned upside when her husband proposes the ultimate quest: Just the two of them taking a six month leave from employment and hiking the Pacific Coast Trail. I will be totally honest. I didn't even know what the PCT was until I read this book! (No worries, if you don't either, just go HERE to learn more.) Through sheer willpower and inner strength, Gail shares her entire adventure (and misfortunes!) in this adventurous novel.
The thing I adore about Gail Storey is that she is definitely not a camping kind of girl. Hiking either for that matter. When I first started reading the book, I thought there way NO WAY that girl was going to make it all the way from Mexico to Canada. That is over 2,600 miles of hiking. Yikes! And the more I read, the more I understood that it's not just an easy breezy summer adventure. Gail had to deal with many freezing nights and blistering hot days. The more you read in this book, the more you fall in love with this adorable girl who is terrified of sleeping outdoors.
There are so many wonderful messages in this book, my favorite being the faith and trust she has in her partner and husband, Porter. Porter is a total outdoorsman who not only is experienced in hiking and adventuring, but this guy has some serious DIY skills too. Most of their clothing, backpacks, and equipment was sewn or adapted by Porter himself. Porter has complete faith in Gail, and despite her reservations, the two together make up a fabulous team of survivalists. There is just no possible way to spend six months isolated together and not come out with a stronger bond and relationship. When Gail was torn deciding whether to go or not, it was the idea of spending so much time with her husband that drew her to the trail.
Wonder if Gail made it to the end of the PCT? Sorry, I can't tell you. :) But I will share that Gail's amazing story of extreme weight-loss, strained extended family-relations, and pursuit of discovering her true self, made this story a must read for any woman. Sometimes we choose the harder path in life, and Gail's story is a beautiful triumphant tale about a woman finding out who she really is.
The thing I adore about Gail Storey is that she is definitely not a camping kind of girl. Hiking either for that matter. When I first started reading the book, I thought there way NO WAY that girl was going to make it all the way from Mexico to Canada. That is over 2,600 miles of hiking. Yikes! And the more I read, the more I understood that it's not just an easy breezy summer adventure. Gail had to deal with many freezing nights and blistering hot days. The more you read in this book, the more you fall in love with this adorable girl who is terrified of sleeping outdoors.
There are so many wonderful messages in this book, my favorite being the faith and trust she has in her partner and husband, Porter. Porter is a total outdoorsman who not only is experienced in hiking and adventuring, but this guy has some serious DIY skills too. Most of their clothing, backpacks, and equipment was sewn or adapted by Porter himself. Porter has complete faith in Gail, and despite her reservations, the two together make up a fabulous team of survivalists. There is just no possible way to spend six months isolated together and not come out with a stronger bond and relationship. When Gail was torn deciding whether to go or not, it was the idea of spending so much time with her husband that drew her to the trail.
Wonder if Gail made it to the end of the PCT? Sorry, I can't tell you. :) But I will share that Gail's amazing story of extreme weight-loss, strained extended family-relations, and pursuit of discovering her true self, made this story a must read for any woman. Sometimes we choose the harder path in life, and Gail's story is a beautiful triumphant tale about a woman finding out who she really is.
July 26, 2019
I enjoyed the parts about the trail. I found many of the comments made by the author to be racist and ignorant. I couldn’t believe she compared her voluntary decision to hike the PCT to be similar to the plight of of undocumented immigrants; to say that she knew what they were going through. She was also shocked that a straight male could dance so well another ignorant comment. She complained incessantly about weight she was carrying though in the grand scheme of things it was below average weight as her husband was carrying the majority of the gear. I couldn’t believe that they ran out of water, water treatment pills and other essential supplies for the sake of weight. It seemed irresponsible. I found it interesting that she commented on how much lighter the gear of the Porter’s was compared to the other middle aged couple - except they had all the supplies they needed to successfully complete the trail. I didn’t care for the over-sharing of their sex life on the trail. I found some of the comments to be very co-dependent. I was glad that she made the decision to leave the trail once her health was at risk. I was very impressed at the length of trail that she completed. Though I was very turned off by her many ignorant and needy comments, I kept reading hoping that within her journey there would be personal growth and reflection as to assumptions and comments she had made about people, other thru-hikers, different social classes, and communities - I was left disappointed.
March 6, 2014
Promises (with a spoiler...I couldn't help myself!)
Gail Storey's memoir of hiking the Pacific Crest Trail with her nature-loving husband is part trail guide and all heart. I never imagined the perils or stamina required to hike that trail. The two are in love and yet are also opposite in so many ways. Porter is so motivated, so hardwired to complete the hike, he creates all their ultra-light gear in advance. Gail, who "never much cared for nature," throws parties before they leave their well-heeled life in Houston, in case she and her husband die on the trail.
It's an engaging blow-by-blow account from southern California to Canada. Though the couple share the same trail, they don't share the same fate. Gail's body, after dropping 23 pounds, graciously says NO FURTHER, and though she longs to stay with Porter on the great rocky trail, her mind says OK. That surrender allows her to help Porter and her dying mother, who are both treading difficult paths.
"I Promise Not to Suffer" helps take human suffering down a notch or two. It really outlines a noble path, into and through suffering. The Pacific Crest Trail dharma path reveals beauty in going, beauty in returning. Pain is not the same as suffering, Storey shows us, with the power of a dozen or two mountain passes.
Gail Storey's memoir of hiking the Pacific Crest Trail with her nature-loving husband is part trail guide and all heart. I never imagined the perils or stamina required to hike that trail. The two are in love and yet are also opposite in so many ways. Porter is so motivated, so hardwired to complete the hike, he creates all their ultra-light gear in advance. Gail, who "never much cared for nature," throws parties before they leave their well-heeled life in Houston, in case she and her husband die on the trail.
It's an engaging blow-by-blow account from southern California to Canada. Though the couple share the same trail, they don't share the same fate. Gail's body, after dropping 23 pounds, graciously says NO FURTHER, and though she longs to stay with Porter on the great rocky trail, her mind says OK. That surrender allows her to help Porter and her dying mother, who are both treading difficult paths.
"I Promise Not to Suffer" helps take human suffering down a notch or two. It really outlines a noble path, into and through suffering. The Pacific Crest Trail dharma path reveals beauty in going, beauty in returning. Pain is not the same as suffering, Storey shows us, with the power of a dozen or two mountain passes.
May 17, 2013
Having won this book from a Goodreads giveaway, I received and read it within a week! There was so much I loved about this story. I loved that the story was about hiking, but so much more! I especially loved the descriptions of the trails and her feelings about herself, her relationships, including and most especially those with the other thru-hikers, and nature. I loved the mountain lion's appearance and significance. I was so sad when she had to leave the trail but was happy that she continued her journey with Porter from afar. Last summer my family was lucky enough to go to Yellowstone and to experience some significant hiking and wildlife viewing (although NOTHING close to the PCT!) and I found myself having similar self-awakening moments while at one with nature. I would have loved more details about her childhood, more stories from the trail, even more information about what happened after Porter returned, where did they relocate, how did the changes in their lives out on the trail transfer to "real" life? Thank you so much for allowing me to read and review this book through first reads!
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
June 10, 2013
Gail embarked on the 2,663-mile trek from Mexico to Canada not because she wanted to or loved nature (neither of which was true) but because it was her husband's dream and she seemed to live most of her life through her nearly obsessive love of her husband. Nonetheless, she managed to hike over 900 life-threatening miles, traversing the hottest deserts and highest mountains of California. She stayed open to how such a trek changes a person and a relationship. She used her heightened awareness to be truly present during her difficult mother's final days. And I bet that she has enjoyed a richer and fuller life ever since. I appreciated her frank and humorous description of the intense challenges and unpleasantness of the PCT as well as her poetic insights about being stripped down to a more basic human essence through undertaking such a challenge. My only complaints were about the strangely halting dialogue and my feeling that I wanted her to stay with each revelation a little longer, go a little deeper for the reader. I often felt like one of her butterflies, lighting on a profound truth, only to flit away before fully understanding it.
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