Inside Out

Inside Out #1

by Evan Francisco

The latest updated manuscript is now available on FictionPress.

When teen wolf Jordan Patterson finds out that his mate turned out to be Jace Andrews, the most popular werewolf in the pack and the one he hated the most, he decides to ignore his feelings and hide. But their mate bond is too strong and falling in love is definitely inevitable.

Genres: M M Romance, Shapeshifters, Paranormal, Young Adult, Romance, Gay, Vampires

377 pages, Online

First published January 1, 2013

About the author

This is a pseudonym of a Malaysian author. His work is currently updated and available on Wattpad under the username evanfrancisco

Reviews

[Jeff Erno · Rating 4 out of 5]

When I began reading this book, I was taken aback by the writing style. I knew within a few paragraphs that the author's native language was not English. The biggest clues were verb tense and sentence structure. It read like a poor translation from Spanish where perhaps it had been translated simply by copying and pasting the entire text into Google Translate.

I collect books on my Kindle and often do not remember where I've purchased or downloaded them, and in this case, I'd forgotten that the book was a free download. When I went back to investigate, I discovered the author indeed did not speak English as his native language, and when he began posting this free story online he was only fourteen years old.

So I decided to continue reading, and I wasn't sorry. After a few pages, I got used to mentally correcting/adjusting the grammar and simply focused on the amazing story. This book is like a gay teen paranormal smorgasbord. It features an endearing protagonist named Jordan who has imprinted with the hottest guy in school, jock superstar Jace Andrews. Both Jordan and Jace are werewolves, and therefore they mate for life with the partner who shares their soul (in other words, their soul mate).

The only problem is that Jordan can't stand Jace. Jace has always bullied him from the time Jordan was a small child, and Jordan detests the idea of sharing any part of his life with this obnoxious jerk. Yet physically and sexually he's drawn to Jace. So he wages a powerful internal struggle.

The author includes a variety of unique supernatural creatures, an exciting sporting event, and a hilarious family dynamic. The cast of secondary characters is also remarkable.

Overall, I absolutely loved the 377 page story, and I'm dying for more. I'd love for someone to edit the grammar and professionally publish it. This author has amazing talent.

[Arif Zulkifli · Rating 4 out of 5]

AHHHHH THIS BOOK IS SOOOO SWEET AND MUSHY AND GOOD AND MAKING MY HEART GOES AHHHH!

I love Ijat’s writing. Though it’s simple, and direct, but this makes the pace of my reading to be fast. At first, I really hate Jordan since he’s so annoying and selfish. But halfway into the book, I can accept him already. Thank god.

And can we talk about Jace? Oh my, Jace. Yes! Ahah

Some scenes, especially the fighting scene during The Combat, to me is written a bit rushed. I couldn’t imagine how they were fighting. I don’t know if it’s because of the description or what, but I just couldn’t get it. And I think the ending is a bit rushed too.

I love how Ijat build the world, where the immortals and mortals are living in the same space. In fact the immortals are doing what the mortals do, making them to be more relatable. I hope the world building will be written more detailed, and Ijat will expand them. Maybe he could include other immortals more, other than those in Inside Out. But I really can’t wait to read the second book!

All in all, I really enjoyed reading this book and I will miss every character in this book (except Theo. Theo can choke) until the release of the second book. Good job Ijat! Please don’t stop writing, okay?

[Nurhayati Ramlan · Rating 5 out of 5]

4.8 stars

This book gave me so many feels. I read this in one sitting and I swear I've never been hit with so many waves of feels like I did with this book.

Inside Out is a really fast paced book. It's compelling, full with drama and fluffy romance scenes. When I said fast paced book, I was talking about how the author slapped one of the biggest conflict in the book right on my face when I was just in Chapter two! Like, WTH? I'm still trying to figure out how I feel about Jordan, still getting to know him more but by Chapter four, I was already on edge and is actually rooting for Jordan, full force!

I'll be honest, when I first read how Jordan describe Jace, I had this little voice inside of my head saying, "Ahh, it's the typical everyone-is-so-into-him character again." I wasn't so sure if I'm going to like him or not but, he changed my mind as I read further.

Jace was a jerk if you look at him from the eye of the narrator. He teased Jordan enough as they grow up for Jordan to hate him but, I wasn't seeing him as a jerk much, except for the few scenes where he expressed his feelings and frustrations to Jordan through violence. Those are kind of a jerk move but other than that, he's quite okay and he had me cooing over every little thing he did to/for Jordan. *Shower of feels*

There are a few parts where I feel like they were a bit rushing. Some where I hope would be prolonged even for a bit. I'm so interested with this healing by their bond-mates process. I'm aware that the author described how the immortals/wolves heal really fast from their injuries but, I wish I could read a scene where they showed their vulnerable side while they're healing. It was not like there wasn't any but, they were too short and abrupt. Call me a sadist but I really like this kind of scenes in books or movies. haha.

Another thing that bothered me was how they address each other. Although I kind of get why they called each other 'dude' or man, I just wish Jordan wouldn't use it so much. I love when he called Jace, Jace. It sounds much more sweet and romantic. haha.

That aside, Inside Out also offers some very interesting theories/facts involving wolves and their mates tales. I'm used to reading numerous of Wolfau fictions, so I'm not new to this but I still find the whole thing to be interesting and exciting. It shows how the author took his times and put efforts in doing proper research before he wrote this book.

Whenever a conflict arose and I thought it will be the main conflict, I was proved wrong! I cannot sit still because I keep on having this thought, "Wow, this is so intense!" and I wasn't halfway into the book! The good thing about this is, it left me wanting for more, makes me want to keep on reading and not stop, even for awhile.

So, let me just say this, I love this book. I love how it is full with drama and how the author showered me with a bundle of feels (without giving me any break). I love Jordan and Jace together, they are just so cute. And I love how Jace flirts with Jordan. /sigh contently/

Maybe I'm being bias but I'm pretty sure I'm being as honest as I can as a reader. And for a book that stop my reading slump misery, it deserves the stars I'm giving. :)

To Mr. Evan Francisco ;) Thank you for giving me this opportunity to read your book. YOU PULL ME OUT OF MY READING SLUMP. That is how good you are. I wish you all the best and I can't wait to read more books from you!.

[Alli · Rating 1 out of 5]

I'm so disappointed, I really liked the sound of this story, but it was either not proof read, or translated from another language and not proof read.

I had to stop reading after 30 pages, even correcting the grammar myself, there was so much of it to do, especially in the spoken parts that it all got away from me.

[Ayanna]

"What a pretentious douchey little douchebag."

I mean. Really. MC is basically a girl who dreams of a handsome, sturdy husband to build handsome, sturdy walls, and have the white picket fence/2.5 children American Dream.

Like srsly. (S)He's all "I'm different than those other stinky boys. They play video games and like sports (and porn!), and I like my mommy to tell stories about true mates and true love *sighs*"

He's the quiet, bookish heroine and Jace is the popular, snotty jock, and theirs is a torrential opposites-attract romance, who, against all odds, fall in love and seem perfectly matched for the other. The hazing is just more physical since they're both guys and snatching clothes off a guy is okay whereas it's not with a girl.

"I walked out nakedly" WHAT THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN MEAN??? YOU'RE EITHER NAKED OR YOU'RE NOT, OR I GUESS YOU CAN KIND OF BE KIND OF NAKED, BUT WALKING NAKEDLY? What, are you walking as if you were naked? What does that even look like: full of embarrassment and awkwardly clutching at your parts?

It's like Twilight, but with a slightly less annoying MC.
It's got the same cringe-worthy writing and overblown diction and completely illogical reactions.

AND WHAT THE FUCK, YOU MEAN THIS WHOLE TIME, I HADN'T EVEN REACHED CHAP 1 YET??? Fuckin' fuck.

No, srsly, tho, this book is a mess of painfully awkward stereotypes. Sunny. The accept. What, is she Asian? And wow, female friends who is friends with the MC cuz she wants a gay best friend, wow.

Dear god, no, I can't do this.

DNF ~12%
24

[John Ames · Rating 4 out of 5]

I loved Inside Out. There was something in this little novel that instantly pulled me in. Maybe it was the mystery or the romance, but this novel had it all.

Inside Out stars Jordan. Now Jordan is a very special kid because he belongs to a pack of werewolves that only shift during a full moon. Yes, this story sticks to the original unlike other novels I have read. I loved Jordan. He was very funny, shy, intelligent, and loved reading. In his little world, a werewolf is born with a mate or with half of someone's soul inside of them. Now, the only way you can find your mate is by the bond. The bond can come at anytime and with anyone. With that said, Jordan's mate turns out to be the next Alpha in his group, Jace.

I loved Jace. He was cocky, confident, strong, manly, handsome, a ladies' man and the most popular guy in school. He was simply perfect. He and Jordan were simply friends. He actually made fun of Jordan most of the time. And Jordan, disliked him so much. However, after their souls bonded, they begin to see each other under a new light and that is where the story takes off.

I don't want to give the story away, but overall, the novel was pretty awesome. If you are into shape-shifters, young romance, un-forbidden love, mystery or simple a kick ass young adult novel, this one maybe the one for you. And oh yes, there are vampires in this one too. However, I must warn you, there are so many grammatical errors and spelling errors in this novel that left me wondering if it was ever edited. But, after finding out that this was the author's first novel, I understood why. Your first novel is never perfect since you are just beginning a long journey to become better writer. If you are able to see beyond the author's mistakes, you will definitely fall for this story like I did.

[Rosa · Rating 5 out of 5]

Really really like this story but the grammar kept messing me up because the tenses would get mixed up. It was hard reading a sentence that was in 1st person present tense and then another sentence that was in 1st person past tense or even present or past tense in the same sentence. Tried to fix it in my head but I ended up confusing myself. But beside that I REALLY like this story! It has so much potential and I wouldn't mind buying it if the grammar is fixed. I'm really looking forward to the second book. I also like that Jordan in the jealous and overprotective type. And Callan being mated to a vampire...that is just HOT and so cute. The ending to this story had my mind going on a rampage trying to imagine what might have happened or what DID happen in Jordan's bed. So many naughty thoughts that can't be confirmed, sadly. Also I really liked the little brotherly bonding moment that Jordan and Stanley had in the last chapter. Oh! The beginning of this story had my going CRAZY! I felt like smacking Jordan and telling him that he should just accept Jace at his mate. Couldn't he see how much Jace was suffering :( But they finally got together and I got the opportunity to read all of their lovey-dovey moments, which totally made up for the heartbreaking chapters in the beginning :D

[Evan Francisco]

***AUTHOR REVIEW ALERT! AUTHOR REVIEW ALERT!***

Before you proceed, please feel free to read this post.

Attention, people. Whatever you found on the internet of Inside Out/Upside Down/Shadow/whatever the fuck that has to do with it, it may be the old-school unedited draft UNLESS you found it on either Wattpad or FictionPress.

I'm sorta upset about the comments I received lately. And Inside Out will FOREVER be an update-able, revise-able work-in-progress manuscript UNLESS it is picked up by a publisher whatsoever. Please do note that I am still a studying 16-year old. I have no editor and English is not my native language. I need some support for this.

Thank you. And oh please read the blog post if you haven't already.

[blub · Rating 5 out of 5]

I'm going to grade this based solely on the story and not on all the grammar errors (yes, it was annoying the first few times I had to restructure a sentence in my head but after a while my brain just automatically did it for me). The world and character development was very well done and the author of the story grabbed my attention within the first few pages. I absolutely loved Jace and Jordon and was practically trying to rush through the book to get more information on them. It was interesting learning how the wolves in Evan Francisco's book differed from wolves of other stories I've read. In addition, I really liked the non-discriminating and family like atmosphere that was happening throughout the book.

[Mandy*reads obsessively* · Rating 3 out of 5]

The author says he wrote it at the tender age of 14 and that English is not his native language.
After reading the book, I can see that.
The grammar, tenses and word choices are very distracting, and the 'youthfulness' of the authors voice was at times difficult, but all that aside, I see potential and I was invested enough in the story to finish it!
I will read the second story.

[Azrie Idzmeer · Rating 5 out of 5]

I really like the concept of naturally finding your soulmate. At one point, I was hoping we could reset the universe and live just like the werewolves. The writer did just that to my thoughts with this book. Definitely a five-star, though I'm not really a fan of its ending because I kinda like saw it coming already but still, a five-star story for me. Can't wait to get a physical copy of the second book!

[Arthur · Rating 3 out of 5]

2.5 stars (rounding up to 3 per GR system)

Not a bad book, but is has one of my pet peeves: unnecessary melodrama.

Jordan is a 15-yr old were boy who found out that his mate was the uber popular Jace. Jordan had been interested in mate stories since he was little kid, so he was thrilled that he found his own. However, Jace didn't know that Jordan was his, so he tried to date Heather, although to no avail. Now, here is where the store started to became too melodramatic. Jordan was so angry that Jace--who didn't know who his mate was--was interested in Heather, he decided to hide the fact that he's Jace's mate. Even after Jace told their mutual friend (Sunny) that he didn't sleep with Heather and started to feel the pull of hiding mate, Jordan kept hiding. Not even when Jace's health started to deteriorate and became suicidal, when Jace publicly stated his suspicious that his mate was a guy, or their Alpha had gathering to solve the issue, changed Jordan's mind.

Good thing, after the whole pack members were thrown into chaos, Sunny came to her senses and revealed Jace's mate.

The rest of the book is about 'he-loves-m-he-loves-me-not' between the two, and also among the supporting characters.

Jordan is young, but when his action started to lead the possibility of Jace's suicide is bit too much. It was just throwing away a potential good story.

The writing actually is flowing nicely, and in such young age Mr. Francisco can put together a good length story. I just hope the story can be better. It's free in Good Reads and Smashwords, so check it out if you have time.

[Penelope · Rating 3 out of 5]

It seems like a great plot, but I simply couldn't finish Inside Out. The writing was messy, awkward, haphazard and all in all terrible... Seriously!; I couldn't get past the 4th chapter, and I only came that far because I really, really, really wanted to know what happened when Jace found out that Jordan was his mate. If it was re-written into something readable I would give it more than one star.

[Nijin]

I won't rate it. It has a good idea but grammar isn't even close to anything ready to publishing. I can relate to the second language issue, so here is the recommendation - hire an editor.

[Nightshadephoenix · Rating 4 out of 5]

Honestly it was a cute and heartfelt book. I definitely have my moments of like and hate for most of the characters, but the plot was pretty smooth and made its point that some lovers can't be chosen (rather earned through trust and actions).

[Rexyna Marianna Fara · Rating 5 out of 5]

This story is very nice, I read it twice and I wish I had more chapters to read! It is a romantic novel, the plot is so interesting. Very recommended!

[Honey · Rating 2 out of 5]

1. The grammar was really distracting. I applaud the author’s effort but it still needs more editing. A proof reader perhaps?

2. I don’t understand how Jace's character is supposed to come across as remotely likeable since he beats, bullies and humiliates Jordan.

3. The rest of the characters were a problem also. Sunny, Jordan’s best friend, apparently grew up calling Jordan gay hoping that it would turn him gay, and the “little pack” made up by the young werewolves in the pack are either blind and deaf or stupid for not realizing Jace beat Jason after the book incident.

4. Jason apologized to Jace! For what exactly? For being bullied? I don’t even know what to say to that.

5. Jason fell “madly in love” with Jace for absolutely NO reason. I don’t usually mind insta-love, but I do mind reading about falling instantly in love with the person who has abused you for so long for absolutely no reason other than being mates. Especially since, understandably, Jason couldn’t stand Jace before realizing they were mates.

6. When Jace started going mad from the mating bond, the pack decided that verbally abusing the “girl” who is supposed to be hiding, was the best way to get “her” to come forward. Yup, hearing screams of “bitch” would make up my mind.

7. I didn’t particularly enjoy reading about a character who only stops bullying the other because they’re mates. I just wasn’t able and/or willing to reconcile the Jace that repeatedly punched Jason in the face with the Jace who called him beautiful the following day.

8. Jace acted like a petulant, immature child, even after professing his 12-hour-long deep, deep love for Jason. The changes in his personality gave me whiplash. He would be whiny, catty and conceited one moment and call Jason sweetheart the next. Also, not once did he apologise for the bullying. So since Jace’s behavior was never explained (there seemed to be no reason for it), and he never apologised for the bullying, I just can't rate this any higher.

[Furio · Rating 2 out of 5]

The author admits to being very young and a non native speaker and even asks for the help of his readers to correct his English therefore I will add one star to the actually deserved one-star rating.
His main problem seems to be his syntax and I must wonder what his first language might be: his name seems Spanish but the connectors he uses/fails to use and the warped tense harmony hint at a more exotic L1.

That said, there are some qualities to be found in this werewolf romance.
- Mr Francisco manages to set a nice rhythm, especially in the first half of his novella, despite the rather non existent plot. Later on his pace falters and he decides to throw in a lot of casual mating to keep his reader's interest: the result is obviously clumsy and betrays his inexperience.
- He has the ability to depict convincing settings and situations without wasting words.

On the other hand there are many undue repetitions and a rather clumsy, inconsistent characterization.
Jordan, in particular, seems to be lacking even a trace of spine: he cries, he whines and then he forgives everything. I cannot spoil the story for you, but when Jace catches him and brings him home he does it in an unacceptable way. The morning after Jordan simply forgets about that... NO, NO, NO.
Part of the problem is the insta-mating concept.
It is a fine plot-device in itself but if the author fails to grant his lovers enough self-control and the ability to take decisions it becomes an irritating hindrance.

A minor but irritating point is that the werewolves seem to be much too weak if compared to the other supernaturals in the book: if things really were like that they would have been wiped out centuries before this plot took place.

[Robin · Rating 5 out of 5]

I think that it is and over all really sweet and good book to read.I really liked it. However I think that maybe Jordan and Jace could have not given in so fast to there love you know. see Jace was really mean to Jordan and Jace seemed to really dislike Jordan so even with love those feelings that one felt for one and other don't just go away. Jordan could still come out of hiding and not love Jace and Jace could become mates with Jordan even with the matting bond that was going on. what i am trying to say and don't take this the wrong way because i really did like the book very much but there love should have come slowly they should have been more problems between them that they had to workout to really make it seem real. to make them seem more really. but that's just my thoughts on it. other then that its a really good book and i would love to read another book from this author. what i almost for got there were some selling things but that was OK. it wasn't to bad. p.s i wouldn't mind helping the author out on the book. if they wish i really liked it and i think that they are a good author so if they want my help just ask.

[Lisa · Rating 4 out of 5]

So, I was reading Unwanted Mate on FanFiction and saw that the author had stated that his story was inspired by Inside Out. As I LOVE this WIP I decided to check this out.
It is such an original story and thank goodness Naga-Lord had stated that he got his ideas from this- otherwise it would have been a total rip-off!
This is a great story, my main points would be:
A great story,
Great romantic side to it,
Super angst through a huge proportion of it,
Good pace throughout.

Obviously English isn't the author's first language so you have to ignore the incorrect tenses/ word choices.
It did bug me that Jordan was a bit wimpy and cried a lot throughout this story. I like my female (and that is kind of what he represents in this) characters to be tough and kick arse- emotionally and physically. But apart from that, I thought the overall story was pretty darn fab.
Thank you.

[Xander · Rating 5 out of 5]

A good book with well developed characters with feelings that aren't just there because of the mating bond. Although the mating bond is strong, the two main characters have to work towards their relationship, and it's not easy.

It's humorous, and has the ability to make you smile without realizing it until one of your friends questions it. It's adorable with two lovable main characters. It's definitely worth the read.

[Raphael · Rating 4 out of 5]

Great story, but it felt like Mr. Francisco left several parts of the story untold, and skipped from one scene to another in, haste? Cute couple though, sweet characters. Personally I would've liked the story to be longer, and a bit more detailed and more with descriptions of characters and surroundings.
But all in all, I was almost unable to put the book down after picking it up.

[Pat · Rating 2 out of 5]

Found this to be a well thought out storyline, with good background in being able to tell a well rounded story. My biggest issue is the grammer errors that make reading and enjoying this story difficult.

[Tamarrion Lash · Rating 1 out of 5]

Я правильно понимаю, что автор нерусский? В смысле, что для него английский неродной? Потому что иначе очень сложно объяснить, почему он так издевается над языком.
Сюжет идиотский, герои - картонные дебилы, но это можно было бы пережить, если бы не куча ошибок в тексте.

[Zaa · Rating 3 out of 5]

Inside Out is the first story I've read of this author. The book was okey. The idea (finding your soulmate) isn't fresh but the plot is interesting. And iam quite surprised when I found the author still a teenager (I saw his goodreads profile). He has talent that for sure.

[Kym · Rating 1 out of 5]

Ok...the storyline would have been great. But, who wrote this? The grammatical and spelling errors were atrocious! I felt like I was reading a book written by a non-English speaking author!
Do authors ever have someone else read their work? This one could have used a second or third edit!!

[Mandy Beyers · Rating 2 out of 5]

My problems may have mostly been due to editing, since my edition of the book is older, but I just kept feeling like this story could have been so much better than it was.

[Moniqee · Rating 3 out of 5]

Ahh, it's a cute fantasy story where mate finds mate in a different aspect of what I read. However, I dont like the type of buildup and characters in this story

[Gwengwel]

Free. Online here. Already completed. +Sequel. With teenager.

[Addicted2M/M]

Hard to rate because the grammar issues drove me crazy, but the story made me want to keep reading.