The Dog King

The Human Division #7

by John Scalzi

CDF Lieutenant Harry Wilson has one simple task: Watch an ambassador’s dog while the diplomat is conducting sensitive negotiations with an alien race. But you know dogs - always getting into something. And when this dog gets into something that could launch an alien civil war, Wilson has to find a way to solve the conflict, fast, or be the one in the Colonial Union’s doghouse.

Genres: Science Fiction, Fiction, Audiobook, Space Opera, Short Stories, Aliens, Ebooks

43 pages, Kindle Edition

First published February 26, 2013

About the author

John Scalzi, having declared his absolute boredom with biographies, disappeared in a puff of glitter and lilac scent.

(If you want to contact John, using the mail function here is a really bad way to do it. Go to his site and use the contact information you find there.)

Reviews

[S.A Reidman · Rating 4 out of 5]

Alright folks pack it up. They brought a dog to the mediation. End the war, the greatest mediator has arrived. - Tuffy the dog on an alien planet hanging out in royal gardens.

"They had all been formally introduced to their Icheloe counterparts, with the exception of Wilson, who was clearly an adjunct to the dog."

All system go, The Clarke is back in business and The B-Team is on a mission.

Plot/Storyline/Themes:
A missing king, a civil war, negotiations and who you calling in a crunch? The B-Team that's who. Easy to blame if things go wrong and be pleasantly surprised when things go right. Man the Colonial Union just sleeps on B-Team potential.

Character Development/Favorite Character:
Hey now! Hart Schmidt is back. Oh I missed the banter between Wilson and Schmidt.

Favorite/Curious/Ludicrous/Unique Scene::
Wilson, Schmidt and the Icheloe Groundskeeper discussing the "extraction" of Tuffy from the Kingsflower. Once again, the dialogue in this series is chef's kiss all the way through.
" “Remember that the plant wants to eat you,” the groundskeeper said. “It’s not going to let you get away. Don’t fight it. Let yourself be eaten.”

Favorite/Curious/Ludicrous/Unique Quotes:
🖤 “It’s a bad sign when a shuttle has animal nests in it,” Schmidt said.” (Schmidt being prophetic)
🖤 “Tuffy was the only dog on the planet. That was a lot of territory to mark.” (Wilson on Tuffy's bladder situation)
🖤 “I’ll let you know if I get stuck, you’ll be able to tell by the screaming panic in my voice” (Wilson on rescuing Tuffy)

Favorite/Curious/Ludicrous/Unique Concepts:
■ Tuffy! Who's a good doggie?!
■The Icheloe aliens. Really? A bear and a tick - just ew.
■Fleur du roi - heinous act committed against beloved Tuffy.

StoryGraph Challenge: 1800 Books by 2025
Challenge Prompt: 150 Short Stories by 2025

[Kaethe · Rating 5 out of 5]

A perfect little short story, funny, that fits into the arc. If I thought for a second that diplomacy were anything like Scalzi writes it, I'd be be kicking myself for never having joined the foreign service. He skips over the tedious bits in favor of the clever solution to thorny problems. Such fun.

Interesting that he didn't end each section on a cliff-hanger. Well, interesting because I'm totally enthralled anyway. I'm gonna miss this when it's done.

I bought it.

[Ron · Rating 4 out of 5]

Cute, but barely four stars. The usual Scalzi fun, but didn't seem to advance the greater story arch.

Even with the CDU's advanced technology such a blood transfer shouldn't have been that easy. Was the dog ever going to get its own blood back? Why didn't the crown attach itself to Schmidt?

Like buttered pop corn--not necessarily good for you, but nice.

[Jon · Rating 4 out of 5]

7th episode of The Human Division delivered the laughs and the goods. Wilson rescues Tuffy, a Lhasa apso, who in turn saves the day and the diplomatic mission in true canine selfless fashion.

[Alex · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was a hard one to come up with a rating for;

I like this project a lot. I like the characters and the episodic nature

But this felt like a filler episode. It was cutesy and as far as I can tell didn't have a ton of impact on the greater plot.

I feel like if I were reading this as a completed paperback instead of a digital serial, this chapter would have left me scratching my head as to its necessity.

But maybe waverly will stick around and it'll be important that she doesn't like Wilson. Maybe it's like a game and this is a first brush with a concept that will be brought back later.

Also on a side note I'm mad at whoever pointed out how often Scalzi uses the word "said" bc now it's all I can see

[Anissa · Rating 4 out of 5]

Tuffy caused all sorts of commotion in this installment. I'm pretty sure that Waverly should consider leaving her dog at home instead of taking him with her on diplomatic assignments in future. Wilson & Schmidt didn't disappoint here with their light banter. And I loved the whole bit about the kingflower. I look forward to the next part, of course.

[Gilbert Stack · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a quick and thoroughly enjoyable short story in Scalzi’s Human Division series. The Colonial Union attempts to resolve a two-hundred-year-old civil war on an alien planet in an effort to boost their credibility against their larger alien enemies. As the diplomatic maneuverings come to a close, something strange happens to the ambassador’s dog threatening to throw everything that’s been accomplished out the window.

Frankly, there is nothing in this story that is even remotely surprising except perhaps the ultimate solution to the problem. The first crisis and the surprise are totally predictable—and yet, that only enriched my enjoyment of the tale. It’s nice to occasionally see the problem ahead of the hero and figure out the complication as well. Scalzi makes the diplomatic crisis have a humorous tone that kept me smiling from beginning to end

If you liked this review, you can find more at www.gilbertstack.com/reviews.

[Joe · Rating 4 out of 5]

A mostly innocuous fun side story, showing that in Scalzi's future (just like the present) diplomacy & military service can be small scale or absurd. 😁 I liked the ingenuity Lieutenant Harry used to cut the latest Gordian knot!

[Robert · Rating 4 out of 5]

Better than the last few episodes, in my opinion. I really like Harry as a PoV character and would read entire novels with him as the central character.

My last few ratings for these episodes had fallen due to how I felt that the episodes were too self-contained for me to really get into in book format. While not different from television shows or even short stories, I just was not as satisfied.

I think there needs to be a bit more editing. There were a few parts that looked to me to see slightly off and it is actually something I had noticed with several other episodes. While they were not big things--I believe that in most cases it is the tense of a few words that threw me out of the story. They were small things like using 'was' instead of 'were' or similar things if I recall correctly. Maybe I am wrong and the tense was used properly, but I was jarred out of the story when I read things like that.

I really did enjoy this week’s showing though and look forward to see what John has for us next week.

[Scott · Rating 2 out of 5]

7th episode in The Human Division. Disappointed in this one. It seemed like filler to me. We have Wilson and Schmidt back and there is a diplomatic mission and dog sitting and potential civil war.

BUT

I'm not sure how this ties in with the bigger story arc AND this story doesn't really work alone SO I'm not sure why it was included. Maybe Scalzi uses it later in the book but just looking at this episode on it's own merits, I would have to say that this episode could be skipped and we wouldn't miss it.

[Art · Rating 5 out of 5]

This installment was the comedic relief chapter after three rough and ready installments. Scalzi I believe took a break from the overarching story. Scalzi could have pulled a curve all on us all. It was hilarious and sharply written. The story paced well. Yet another 5 star read.

[Erin (PT) · Rating 4 out of 5]

There's been a lot of humor in these chapters so far, but this one was just laugh out loud funny. It's only not a 5 because it didn't change my world-view. But as stand-alone vignettes and as pieces of a larger story, I am enjoying the hell out of this.

[Nicky · Rating 3 out of 5]

This episode is kinda cute and pretty funny, but again, this still feels bitty and disjointed and I don't think it works as a novel. The serial format makes it sort of alright, but it really doesn't feel unified enough.

[Meghan · Rating 4 out of 5]

This one was just fun. The kind of Scalzi writing that I like best: humorous and fast paced.

It also made me realize what I like about this whole series (Old Man’s War/The Human Division). Scalzi does a very good job of world building. I feel like I can visualize each episode clearly in my mind.

Also, as much as I like Wil Wheaton reading his books, William Dufris is excellent, especially for this series.

[Call me Jeeves · Rating 4 out of 5]

I just started it but I’m completing with a four star rating because I know I’m gonna love it. These serial books and movies have a lot to be desired. For one an author can formulate an idea and work it out as he goes. He can work through multiple characters and introduce ideas and concepts with an ultimate goal. But I guess the goal would need pre formulated.
That is the genius of Scalzi. Start from the beginning read the series in order. Read it multiple times because it just that good.

[Kevin · Rating 4 out of 5]

A story with a canine ad one of the more important characters. While on dog watch, Harry Wilson let’s his charge get eaten by a carnivorous plant and calls for help in rescuing the distressed dog. Recommended

[Emz · Rating 4 out of 5]

How much is that doggy in the window, the one that’s been eaten by that carnivorous plant? I do hope that doggy’s okay. Harry takes a deep dive into the planet's interior and finds more than he bargains for.

[Daniel Erickson · Rating 5 out of 5]

Caution, reading in public might make you the center of attention

I read this sitting in a coffee shop. I laughed so hard I screamed only 4 times. I couldn't put it down. People asked afterwards what I was reading. I think I sold a few people on John Scalzy

[Anna · Rating 5 out of 5]

I particularly love this part! Brilliant!

[Noel · Rating 5 out of 5]

Love John Scalzi - the best keeps coming - these can't be put down. it's a good thing they're all already here for me to read!

[Christine · Rating 5 out of 5]

I found this episode hilarious.

[Michelle · Rating 4 out of 5]

Harry Wilson as a dog handler, this was just plain funny 😆

[Colleen · Rating 4 out of 5]

My favorite in the series so far

[Daniyal · Rating 5 out of 5]

Quite funny.

[x x x · Rating 5 out of 5]

Awesome

Funny twists and even better conversation. You'll want to read it just for the laughs. So these five words done.

[Amy Morris · Rating 5 out of 5]

Another chapter of the whole

[Steve Smythe · Rating 5 out of 5]

LOL, was not expecting that!

I laughed out loud so many times this episode. So funny. A great story. I loved the character interactions. Hilarious.

[Karl Schaeffer · Rating 4 out of 5]

Harry, you job is to watch the dog…

[elsalmon L · Rating 4 out of 5]

Diplomatic relations between the Colonial Union and an alien race the CU is courting almost fail because of the ambassador's dog.

[Jinie Shirey]

Didn’t finish it