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The Artist's Daughter: A Memoir
A poignant memoir of a woman's struggle to deal with the wounds left by her absent father and the realization of how that loss ultimately does-or does not-define her.
256 pages, Paperback
First published April 15, 2013
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691 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 76 reviews
May 22, 2013
It's rare for me to find a memoir that I can hardly put down, but that was my reaction to this book. Alexandra Kuykendall has written an amazingly transparent recounting of her life as a fatherless girl. She writes of her first meeting at age eight with her father in France, and how the void left by his absence has impacted her at all phases of her life. In spite of her mother's constant love, she still wonders if she is truly loved. Even after she became a Christian, Alexandra continued to struggle with feelings of inadequacy.
At times I wanted to cry while reading, because I could feel the emotional pain she tried so hard to bury, and I could truly understand where that was coming from. Though my story is a bit different than hers, I had a few "aha" moments for myself. The perfectionism that can result from father-issues is something I relate to.
I highly recommend this book for Christian women. Alexandra's story is just plain interesting, but more than that it caused me to look inside and ask some good/hard questions. It also helped me realize that everyone has a story, and when I meet someone, I need to take the time to listen and hear where they have come from in order to understand who they are.
At times I wanted to cry while reading, because I could feel the emotional pain she tried so hard to bury, and I could truly understand where that was coming from. Though my story is a bit different than hers, I had a few "aha" moments for myself. The perfectionism that can result from father-issues is something I relate to.
I highly recommend this book for Christian women. Alexandra's story is just plain interesting, but more than that it caused me to look inside and ask some good/hard questions. It also helped me realize that everyone has a story, and when I meet someone, I need to take the time to listen and hear where they have come from in order to understand who they are.
May 15, 2013
When I read someone else's story I am always
looking for myself within their words on a page.
The more I read Alexandra's words, I found
myself identifying with so much of her story.
When she shares the struggle of having an absent father, I know that place.
When she shares the struggle of marriage and motherhood, I know that place.
When she shares the struggle of making new friends, I know that place.
She paints a picture with her words of places
that I know and she speaks to my heart.
I love her transparency throughout her writing as she shares her fears, doubts, and loneliness. But even more than that she speaks grace into these places. The hard places. The places we rarely share with others. She writes about her battle to find her identity in all of it. She doesn't try to tie each part of her story up with a pretty bow, but shows how God works in everything.
Because sometimes those hard places stay hard. But God is there.
I love this book.
Really love it.
It is for daughters, wives, mothers, sisters, and friends.
looking for myself within their words on a page.
The more I read Alexandra's words, I found
myself identifying with so much of her story.
When she shares the struggle of having an absent father, I know that place.
When she shares the struggle of marriage and motherhood, I know that place.
When she shares the struggle of making new friends, I know that place.
She paints a picture with her words of places
that I know and she speaks to my heart.
I love her transparency throughout her writing as she shares her fears, doubts, and loneliness. But even more than that she speaks grace into these places. The hard places. The places we rarely share with others. She writes about her battle to find her identity in all of it. She doesn't try to tie each part of her story up with a pretty bow, but shows how God works in everything.
Because sometimes those hard places stay hard. But God is there.
I love this book.
Really love it.
It is for daughters, wives, mothers, sisters, and friends.
June 1, 2025
I was slow starting this book, due to illness,but once I started reading it, I didn’t want to stop. The author is new to me, but she really told her story well. I could certainly relate to parts of her life story.
July 15, 2020
It was pretty good. Definitely relatable as a somewhat reformed perfectionist. I enjoyed hearing the authors life story and her deep feelings for what she was going through. I appreciated the honesty and the reflection with which she told the story. Gives me a little inspiration and hope for rough times I have had.
June 12, 2019
One summer day in Barcelona, just a week shy of her 9th birthday, author Alexandra Kuykendall met her biological father for the very first time. Prior to this meeting, Kuykendall's life / general living situation revolved around her mother's travels as an ESL teacher. When the opportunity came about to meet her father, Alexandra discovers she has a whole other family of half siblings. The reunion with the father not only stirs up pain and anger within Alexandra, but also brings forth deep insecurities she wasn't fully aware of before this moment.
Kuykendall recounts the years following that summer in Spain, the teenage and college experiences peppered by sporadic letters or phone calls from her dad, the occasional trips to visit him again. It's in college where she meets the man who will later become her husband, that relationship suffering some rocky moments due to Kuykendall's fear of abandonment.
When she enters her motherhood years, Alexandra feels compelled to finally try to make peace with the years of hurt brought about, for the most part by an absentee father. Following the birth of her first child, she battles with postpartum depression. As her kids get a little older, Kuykendall takes a leadership role with her local chapter of MOPS (Mothers of Preschoolers) International.
After about the first hundred pages or so of this book, it becomes less about the troubled relationship between her and her father and more about her motherhood experiences & realizations in general, much of the focus being on her journey of trying to find balance between being there for her kids and finding professional work that fulfills her. In the closing chapters, the book does come back around to the topic of Alexandra and her dad.
At the back of the book, Kuykendall offers a ten page "Questions for Reflection" supplement, ideal for book groups looking for non-fiction titles to spark meaningful discussions. NOTE: Kuykendall is a Christian nonfiction writer, so these questions do have somewhat of a religious lean.
I read this after reading the first two in Kuykendall's "Loving My Actual ____" series. While I didn't find this quite as entertaining a read, I appreciated the backstory it gave me to some of the life references she makes in her other nonfiction work. If nothing else, it gave me a better understanding on the where some of her views on life might have originated.
Kuykendall recounts the years following that summer in Spain, the teenage and college experiences peppered by sporadic letters or phone calls from her dad, the occasional trips to visit him again. It's in college where she meets the man who will later become her husband, that relationship suffering some rocky moments due to Kuykendall's fear of abandonment.
When she enters her motherhood years, Alexandra feels compelled to finally try to make peace with the years of hurt brought about, for the most part by an absentee father. Following the birth of her first child, she battles with postpartum depression. As her kids get a little older, Kuykendall takes a leadership role with her local chapter of MOPS (Mothers of Preschoolers) International.
After about the first hundred pages or so of this book, it becomes less about the troubled relationship between her and her father and more about her motherhood experiences & realizations in general, much of the focus being on her journey of trying to find balance between being there for her kids and finding professional work that fulfills her. In the closing chapters, the book does come back around to the topic of Alexandra and her dad.
At the back of the book, Kuykendall offers a ten page "Questions for Reflection" supplement, ideal for book groups looking for non-fiction titles to spark meaningful discussions. NOTE: Kuykendall is a Christian nonfiction writer, so these questions do have somewhat of a religious lean.
I read this after reading the first two in Kuykendall's "Loving My Actual ____" series. While I didn't find this quite as entertaining a read, I appreciated the backstory it gave me to some of the life references she makes in her other nonfiction work. If nothing else, it gave me a better understanding on the where some of her views on life might have originated.
December 28, 2020
Such an intriguing story. I picked this up at a second hand shop. Loved the little girl looking back at me from the cover and wanted to read on. Alexander writes so well, it keeps the pages flipping thru the first few chapters of meeting her father and her Barcelona memories. Being nine can be hard but being nine and meeting your dad for the first time? She captures her thoughts so well.
Her need for someone who would never leave her and finding Jesus, who never leaves and who stays is done so well. Her faith growing, her descriptions of all that make for the perfect book for any girl looking for the same answers and confidence in Jesus instead of the world.
Some of the book, I felt that Alexandra had unmet expectations about almost everything in her life. I’m guessing it stems from all the unmet expectations from her first meeting with her dad but it was sad to read how she didn’t really love things at first she thought for sure she’s love. You could tell she got ahold of her life as she gave birth to each daughter. I totally get that part, having two right now myself.
I am giving three stars because I felt like the last chapters of the book left so much unsaid. Especially concerning her father and how she felt forgotten by him and his side of the family. I loved that she found that she didn’t need his approval bc she had Jesus and was a true artist’s daughter in God. But I wanted to know more of how she resolved life with her dad’s family too. I still feel much was left unsaid.
Her need for someone who would never leave her and finding Jesus, who never leaves and who stays is done so well. Her faith growing, her descriptions of all that make for the perfect book for any girl looking for the same answers and confidence in Jesus instead of the world.
Some of the book, I felt that Alexandra had unmet expectations about almost everything in her life. I’m guessing it stems from all the unmet expectations from her first meeting with her dad but it was sad to read how she didn’t really love things at first she thought for sure she’s love. You could tell she got ahold of her life as she gave birth to each daughter. I totally get that part, having two right now myself.
I am giving three stars because I felt like the last chapters of the book left so much unsaid. Especially concerning her father and how she felt forgotten by him and his side of the family. I loved that she found that she didn’t need his approval bc she had Jesus and was a true artist’s daughter in God. But I wanted to know more of how she resolved life with her dad’s family too. I still feel much was left unsaid.
January 15, 2019
The Artist's Daughter: A Memoir by Alexandra Kuykendall is a person story of finding one's identity in God, their father.
I heard Alex's amazing story while at MomCon (a conference for MOPS International). I was blown away by her presence and peace. She knew exactly who she was and that knowledge came from God and being "the Artist's" daughter.
The book was a good but I was already aware of the story so it was less revealing for me that it could have been. I also found it difficult to relate to parts because I know my father and he is such a strong and powerful person in my life. I think this book would have great for my mom who did not have a father growing up and had identity issues from that missing piece.
I would recommend this book to teens/young adults who did not have a strong father in their life. I believe they would be able to learn a lot about acceptance through the story.
I heard Alex's amazing story while at MomCon (a conference for MOPS International). I was blown away by her presence and peace. She knew exactly who she was and that knowledge came from God and being "the Artist's" daughter.
The book was a good but I was already aware of the story so it was less revealing for me that it could have been. I also found it difficult to relate to parts because I know my father and he is such a strong and powerful person in my life. I think this book would have great for my mom who did not have a father growing up and had identity issues from that missing piece.
I would recommend this book to teens/young adults who did not have a strong father in their life. I believe they would be able to learn a lot about acceptance through the story.
February 3, 2022
A beautiful and raw memoir. I think as we become wives and mothers, we often have to rediscover ourself, reflect on life and why we do the things we do, say the things we say, think the things we think. We often feel unseen and unheard. But when we have hurts from the past, especially ones we haven’t found closure with, I think the questions of life become harder to answer. Throughout the book the author focuses on figuring out answers to a few questions of her own; Am I loved? Am I lovable? Am I loving? From a Christian perspective, I love the times she out loud wrestles with her faith and God throughout life’s trials. Who hasn’t done that?! And in the end, even though it seems as if there are still things unanswered and not dealt with, she has found peace and found her identity in the only One who truly matters.
June 27, 2020
This book was phenomenal. I thrifted this book last summer. Because of Covid-19, I finally decided to pick it up from my shelf, dust it off, and give it a try. I was expecting this story to be a light hearted memoir about summer and adventure. I was surprised to find that it was the exact opposite of my shallow prediction. I am so happy I was wrong.
This book was a very emotional read for me. As a christian, I felt all of the authors struggles. She discusses her difficulty with her father's absence in her life, her marriage, babies, and more. I relate to this author so much. I felt like I was sitting with her, having a cup of coffee and crying as I listen to her tell me her story. So personal and raw. I loved every second of it.
Highly recommend to any woman of any age.
This book was a very emotional read for me. As a christian, I felt all of the authors struggles. She discusses her difficulty with her father's absence in her life, her marriage, babies, and more. I relate to this author so much. I felt like I was sitting with her, having a cup of coffee and crying as I listen to her tell me her story. So personal and raw. I loved every second of it.
Highly recommend to any woman of any age.
November 8, 2022
This It was nice to read, but really she never tells who her dad actually is. (I have a theory and only a theory that it is Antoni Tapies i Barba) It's absolutely sad that Alexandra puts so much of the blame on her father when it is equally her mother Sarah's fault. Not taking your daughter to meet her father until 8 is pure selfish. Mother's love their children fiercely I get that, but living her life keeping Alexandra away from a father that long (then continuing the behavior) is her mom's fault. Maybe had Sarah started young with phone calls, letters, and visits Alexandra wouldn't have had such turmoil with her father. The loss of identity by becoming a mother also happens to almost all new mothers. Between being a new wife, moving, and becoming a new mom Alexandra's stories hit home.
April 24, 2022
This book met me on a heart level I was not expecting. So many of Alexandra's heart cries matched the pain, wounds, fears, and struggles I've faced in my own life. This goes to show that we can find ourselves seen even in someone else's story. As I traveled with Alexandra through her childhood into becoming a college student, a young bride, a new mom, and a leader - I felt a kindred connection to her pursuit of "having faith even when she still had questions." She shares the gracious wisdom of her mentors throughout the book, bringing tangible takeaways for our own journeys.
Kuykendall's story is filled with heartbreak, but it is laced with the unending power of hope.
Kuykendall's story is filled with heartbreak, but it is laced with the unending power of hope.
October 5, 2019
I bought this book at a thrift store thinking it is about growing up in an artist house, surrounded by art and traveling in Europe. The book evolved into a different direction than I thought, but I was fascinated by how raw, open and honest she is and was surprised how much spiritual context it had. Easy to read and a refreshing perspective on motherhood, forgiveness, faith, and belonging. What I really love was the ending and how she mentioned, she was the Artist daughter of God.
March 30, 2018
Bought this book at thrift store thinking is about Barcelona and Italy. I am fascinated by Italy but my surprise was how much spiritual context it had and how much It related to my life. What I really love was the ending and how she mention, she was the Artist daughter of God, which I consider one too. Lovely book 💚
Read
December 8, 2023Did not finish. Thought this was going to be a regular memoir as it started off about the author’s relationship with her father but then became more about her relationship with God which isn’t of interest to me.
July 29, 2017
Interesting, not really my type of read. it was slow moving and took me a long time to read as I was wanting to read other books instead.
April 3, 2020
I only wish I’d read this book when I first became a mother.
Read
January 28, 2021interesting journey of a mom.
May 13, 2022
❤️❤️❤️AME me hizo sentir tanto!
September 1, 2023
3 1/2 stars. Sadly relatable to my life in many aspects (father aspects). Overall a decent read.
July 16, 2025
Great story. I learned a lot while reading this book - very eye opening when thinking of father/daughter relationships.
May 16, 2013
Wednesday, May 15, 2013
The Artist's Daughter: A Memoir by Alexandra Kuykendall, ©2013
How I've come to understand who I am.
--Alexandra Kuykendall
I am so thankful to be the Artist's daughter!
He stilled the storm to a whisper; the waves of the sea were hushed. They were glad when it grew calm, and He guided them to their desired haven.
--Psalm 107:29-30
"Alex" speaks with clarity and openness as she lays her memoir to the light with those around her, loving her, speaking into her life. Realizing unmet expectations of what others do not have to give or do not choose to give. A story of settling (not "settling for" but "settling in"), of finding a place to live, to be alive with hope. As a mother hen spread her wings over her chicks to fend off harm, the Lord has done this for Alex. So dear, and so close, His breath is near.
To join your past with open ears and hearts, to open feelings to the unknown. To come aware of what is lacking, to reach out for what is not to be. A heart of passion, a heart of caring, Alex feels her way as she begins to close the gap for others, searching and sharing where they are.
Alexandra Kuykendall is a giver as she exposes her heart with gratitude; becoming aware of what she has been given.
Each time he said, "My grace is all you need. My power works best in weakness." So now I am glad to boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ can work through me.
--2 Corinthians 12:9
Alexandra weaves yesterday and today in a vivid and soothing relating of a life hidden and revealed. She has entered with others in hopes of connection and openness to bring life alive out of the darkness into His marvelous light. What is exposed cannot remain hidden to bring you to freedom, to set the captives free.
Thy testimonies have I taken as an heritage for ever: for they are the rejoicing of my heart.
--Psalm 119:111
In vulnerability, she shows what receiving grace means, what it has done; to be loved with an everlasting love.
The strengthening that comes from loss and separation, from abandonment in our lives. Who I am can better be answered by Whose I am. I am loved. I am cared for. I am complete in Him.
Psalm 139:1-2
O Lord, You have searched me and known me.
You know my sitting down and my rising up;
You understand my thought afar off.
It takes a lifetime to know what-and who-defines you.
When Alexandra Kuykendall became a mother, she knew she had to go back to the beginning. To that hot July afternoon in Barcelona when she met her father for the first time. The only daughter of a single, world-traveling mother and an absent artist father, Alexandra embarks on a soul-searching trip into the past to make sense of the layers of her life―both the memories she experienced and the ones she wished for.
The Artist's Daughter will take you on a journey of discovery through childhood, marriage, and motherhood. Through short vignettes full of both wonder and heartache, Alexandra seeks answers to three life-defining questions: Am I lovable? Am I loved? Am I loving? If you long to better understand the path your life has taken, where it is heading, and who is guiding you, this revealing and refreshing story will push you toward those answers as it changes your heart.
Alexandra Kuykendall lives in Denver, Colorado with her husband Derek and their four daughters. She is on staff at MOPS International (Mothers of Preschoolers) where she is a regular contributor and consulting editor to various publications and a frequent speaker for the organization. While she spends most days buckling and unbuckling car seats and trying to find a better solution to the laundry dilemma, she manages to snatch minutes here and there to write about the quest for purpose in it all.
***Thank you to Revell Blog Tour Network Nonfiction for inviting me to be a part of the blog tour for Alexandra Kuykendall's The Artist's Daughter and for sending me a copy of the book. No other compensation was received.***
Questions for Reflection are included in the back of the memoir for each section.
The Artist's Daughter: A Memoir by Alexandra Kuykendall, ©2013
How I've come to understand who I am.
--Alexandra Kuykendall
I am so thankful to be the Artist's daughter!
He stilled the storm to a whisper; the waves of the sea were hushed. They were glad when it grew calm, and He guided them to their desired haven.
--Psalm 107:29-30
"Alex" speaks with clarity and openness as she lays her memoir to the light with those around her, loving her, speaking into her life. Realizing unmet expectations of what others do not have to give or do not choose to give. A story of settling (not "settling for" but "settling in"), of finding a place to live, to be alive with hope. As a mother hen spread her wings over her chicks to fend off harm, the Lord has done this for Alex. So dear, and so close, His breath is near.
To join your past with open ears and hearts, to open feelings to the unknown. To come aware of what is lacking, to reach out for what is not to be. A heart of passion, a heart of caring, Alex feels her way as she begins to close the gap for others, searching and sharing where they are.
Alexandra Kuykendall is a giver as she exposes her heart with gratitude; becoming aware of what she has been given.
Each time he said, "My grace is all you need. My power works best in weakness." So now I am glad to boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ can work through me.
--2 Corinthians 12:9
Alexandra weaves yesterday and today in a vivid and soothing relating of a life hidden and revealed. She has entered with others in hopes of connection and openness to bring life alive out of the darkness into His marvelous light. What is exposed cannot remain hidden to bring you to freedom, to set the captives free.
Thy testimonies have I taken as an heritage for ever: for they are the rejoicing of my heart.
--Psalm 119:111
In vulnerability, she shows what receiving grace means, what it has done; to be loved with an everlasting love.
The strengthening that comes from loss and separation, from abandonment in our lives. Who I am can better be answered by Whose I am. I am loved. I am cared for. I am complete in Him.
Psalm 139:1-2
O Lord, You have searched me and known me.
You know my sitting down and my rising up;
You understand my thought afar off.
It takes a lifetime to know what-and who-defines you.
When Alexandra Kuykendall became a mother, she knew she had to go back to the beginning. To that hot July afternoon in Barcelona when she met her father for the first time. The only daughter of a single, world-traveling mother and an absent artist father, Alexandra embarks on a soul-searching trip into the past to make sense of the layers of her life―both the memories she experienced and the ones she wished for.
The Artist's Daughter will take you on a journey of discovery through childhood, marriage, and motherhood. Through short vignettes full of both wonder and heartache, Alexandra seeks answers to three life-defining questions: Am I lovable? Am I loved? Am I loving? If you long to better understand the path your life has taken, where it is heading, and who is guiding you, this revealing and refreshing story will push you toward those answers as it changes your heart.
Alexandra Kuykendall lives in Denver, Colorado with her husband Derek and their four daughters. She is on staff at MOPS International (Mothers of Preschoolers) where she is a regular contributor and consulting editor to various publications and a frequent speaker for the organization. While she spends most days buckling and unbuckling car seats and trying to find a better solution to the laundry dilemma, she manages to snatch minutes here and there to write about the quest for purpose in it all.
***Thank you to Revell Blog Tour Network Nonfiction for inviting me to be a part of the blog tour for Alexandra Kuykendall's The Artist's Daughter and for sending me a copy of the book. No other compensation was received.***
Questions for Reflection are included in the back of the memoir for each section.
May 24, 2013
Story Description:
Baker Publishing Group|April 15, 2013|Trade Paperback|ISBN: 978-0-8007-2205-0
When Alexandra Kuykendall became a mother it was the beginning of a soul-searching journey that took her into her past and made her question everything she’d experienced – and a lot of what she hadn’t. The only daughter of a single, world-traveling mother and an absent artist father, Alexandra shares her unique quest to answer universal questions. Am I lovable? Am I loved? Am I loving?
In short, moving episodes, Alexandra transports readers into a life that included a childhood in Europe, a spiritual conversion marked more by questions than answers, a courtship in the midst of a call to be with troubled teens, marriage and motherhood – and always, always, the questions of identity. Through her personal journey, women will discover their own path to understanding the shape of their lives and a deeper sense of God’s intimate presence within it.
My Review:
Alexandra Kuykendall remembers being in Barcelona, Spain in the hot July heat when she was just nine-years-old. She wanted to know who she was and where she came from. Alex was good at holding things in, so she willed herself to push her nerves and excitement down, piling them onto the mountain of questions and unease she’d been holding in all her short life. She was hoping that today would be a new beginning as she was in a cab with her Mom on her way to meet her father for the very first time.
Alex wondered why she’d never been told that her father lived here before she and her mother arrived for their vacation. And, what had prompted her mother to look him up in the phone book just yesterday? Why had she arranged this meeting?
Alex and her mom were on the back end of a yearlong journey. They had left the United States the summer before to move to Italy, where her mom found a job teaching English in a small factory town. For an entire year they lived abroad but Alex missed the United States, especially Saturday morning cartoons and french fries and she was tired of being an outsider in a small town. Finally, mom and Alex moved back to Seattle.
When they finally arrived at the café, Alex was sorely disappointed in the man who was supposed to be her father. She thought all dads were in their mid-30’s who wore business suits, had clean-cut hair and looked like models in the JC Penny catalogue. This was not the man she met.
He was her father alright, but not at all what she longed for, hoped for, nor was expecting. Alex felt he wasn’t enough. She also felt it terribly unfair that she should end up with a second hand model.
What it was time to leave her father stood up and hugged her from the side. Alex felt uncomfortable and the hug felt forced. She expected to feel a familiarity with the man, but she didn’t. But, she was still hopeful that when the awkwardness passed, when he knew her, she would know what it was to have a father’s love. That huge, gaping hole would be filled in.
In her teenage years, Alex was introduced to God and began to explore her religious beliefs which eventually became a big part of her. The relationship with her father remained sporadic over the years and did she ever truly feel loved and wanted by him? Did she feel lovable? The author does a wonderful job at getting these points across to the reader.
The Artist’s Daughter gracefully unravels one woman’s life story in ways that the reader will be able to relate too. Alexandra Kuykendall explores the joys and boundaries of families and storytelling.
I would like to thank Graf-Martin for the reader’s copy of this book.
Baker Publishing Group|April 15, 2013|Trade Paperback|ISBN: 978-0-8007-2205-0
When Alexandra Kuykendall became a mother it was the beginning of a soul-searching journey that took her into her past and made her question everything she’d experienced – and a lot of what she hadn’t. The only daughter of a single, world-traveling mother and an absent artist father, Alexandra shares her unique quest to answer universal questions. Am I lovable? Am I loved? Am I loving?
In short, moving episodes, Alexandra transports readers into a life that included a childhood in Europe, a spiritual conversion marked more by questions than answers, a courtship in the midst of a call to be with troubled teens, marriage and motherhood – and always, always, the questions of identity. Through her personal journey, women will discover their own path to understanding the shape of their lives and a deeper sense of God’s intimate presence within it.
My Review:
Alexandra Kuykendall remembers being in Barcelona, Spain in the hot July heat when she was just nine-years-old. She wanted to know who she was and where she came from. Alex was good at holding things in, so she willed herself to push her nerves and excitement down, piling them onto the mountain of questions and unease she’d been holding in all her short life. She was hoping that today would be a new beginning as she was in a cab with her Mom on her way to meet her father for the very first time.
Alex wondered why she’d never been told that her father lived here before she and her mother arrived for their vacation. And, what had prompted her mother to look him up in the phone book just yesterday? Why had she arranged this meeting?
Alex and her mom were on the back end of a yearlong journey. They had left the United States the summer before to move to Italy, where her mom found a job teaching English in a small factory town. For an entire year they lived abroad but Alex missed the United States, especially Saturday morning cartoons and french fries and she was tired of being an outsider in a small town. Finally, mom and Alex moved back to Seattle.
When they finally arrived at the café, Alex was sorely disappointed in the man who was supposed to be her father. She thought all dads were in their mid-30’s who wore business suits, had clean-cut hair and looked like models in the JC Penny catalogue. This was not the man she met.
He was her father alright, but not at all what she longed for, hoped for, nor was expecting. Alex felt he wasn’t enough. She also felt it terribly unfair that she should end up with a second hand model.
What it was time to leave her father stood up and hugged her from the side. Alex felt uncomfortable and the hug felt forced. She expected to feel a familiarity with the man, but she didn’t. But, she was still hopeful that when the awkwardness passed, when he knew her, she would know what it was to have a father’s love. That huge, gaping hole would be filled in.
In her teenage years, Alex was introduced to God and began to explore her religious beliefs which eventually became a big part of her. The relationship with her father remained sporadic over the years and did she ever truly feel loved and wanted by him? Did she feel lovable? The author does a wonderful job at getting these points across to the reader.
The Artist’s Daughter gracefully unravels one woman’s life story in ways that the reader will be able to relate too. Alexandra Kuykendall explores the joys and boundaries of families and storytelling.
I would like to thank Graf-Martin for the reader’s copy of this book.
April 12, 2019
I picked this up and read it before I read Loving My Actual Neighbor (am on the launch team). I thought it would be good to know something about her before I read the launch book. It was very revealing about her life, not a typical American child’s growing up. She is the only child of a single mother and an absent artist father that basically bothers her quite a bit. She had the experience of living and traveling around the world. You can also see how her marriage and raising children was affected by her growing up years, as it is in all who get married and have children. I like memoirs, and I recommend this one.
January 21, 2022
Bought this book at a thrift store thinking is about Barcelona and Italy. I was fascinated by Italy but my surprise was how much spiritual context it had, how much I can related to my life. What I really love was the ending and how she mention she was the artist daughter of God, which I consider one too. Lovely book💕
January 2, 2017
I was disappointed with this read. A lot of Jesus talk and so much emphasis on the tragedy of having a distant, uninvolved father. Ho-hum.
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April 14, 2013I'm not sure how to rate this one. It wasn't what I was expecting and I was kind of confused what the point was when I finished. However, it is a memoir and our lives don't always have plots like in novels. I was hoping to read more about growing up traveling around the world and the struggle for a place to belong. It is an issue I have and I was hoping to find a kindred spirit and possibly a new outlook. Unfortunately, there were only a few chapters about this and I was let down with the lack of foreign influences. I know the author was not a missionary kid, but most MKs have much more extensive travels and foreign influences. I am very much a part of the MK culture even if I am not officially one myself. I don't feel like I connected with the author on the same level as I had hoped.
All of that is to say that my expectations about what the book was about disappointed me, I'm not saying anything bad about the actual book and writing, the disappointment is my fault :)
I was a bit confused with how everything worked together. It was very well written and I was glued to it. I felt like the author was a friend telling me about her life. However, when I finished, I kept turning pages looking for more. "That's it?" I was waiting for the different chapters to work together. I would remember bits of it after I had finished and I would think, "Now where was that from?" (I think all bibliophiles know what that is like!) and my mind would work back to the book. Then I would try to remember how that tidbit was concluded and there didn't seem to be a conclusion. Maybe I need to think about it more because I'm sure the author had it in there for a reason.
The writing was excellent and will keep you reading until the end. I'm just not sure how much of my issues with the plot are related to the fact it is a memoir and not a novel.
All of that is to say that my expectations about what the book was about disappointed me, I'm not saying anything bad about the actual book and writing, the disappointment is my fault :)
I was a bit confused with how everything worked together. It was very well written and I was glued to it. I felt like the author was a friend telling me about her life. However, when I finished, I kept turning pages looking for more. "That's it?" I was waiting for the different chapters to work together. I would remember bits of it after I had finished and I would think, "Now where was that from?" (I think all bibliophiles know what that is like!) and my mind would work back to the book. Then I would try to remember how that tidbit was concluded and there didn't seem to be a conclusion. Maybe I need to think about it more because I'm sure the author had it in there for a reason.
The writing was excellent and will keep you reading until the end. I'm just not sure how much of my issues with the plot are related to the fact it is a memoir and not a novel.
April 9, 2014
The Artist's Daughter promises to be a story of identity, relationships, and a girl's coming of age. In the memoir, Alexandra Kuykendall explores the relationship (of lack thereof) with her absent father. The first chapter documents their first interaction that took place while Kuykendall and her adventurous, globe-trotting single mother were living in Europe. I loved the beauty and simplicity of the first few chapters. And those pages, combined with the book's title and cover photo, promised an interesting coming-of-age in Europe kind of memoir.
However, after that brief introduction, the book quickly changed scope, and so drastically, in fact, I had to flip back to be sure I hadn't missed something. The book shifted to reflections on life as a stay-at-home mom, and Kuykendall writes honestly of the struggles encountered in that role.
While I appreciated the honesty and the sentiment, I very much felt that the book had promised a different story. Rather than truly telling much about the relationship with her father, the great majority of the book dealt with mothering, and then, at the very end, the conclusion to Kuykendall's father story returned, but almost as an after thought.
I felt unfulfilled at the end of the book. Perhaps I would have read this book differently had I been a mother, but at this point in my life, I honestly felt a little disappointed with the book and wished for more of The Artist and less of his daughter's American story.
However, after that brief introduction, the book quickly changed scope, and so drastically, in fact, I had to flip back to be sure I hadn't missed something. The book shifted to reflections on life as a stay-at-home mom, and Kuykendall writes honestly of the struggles encountered in that role.
While I appreciated the honesty and the sentiment, I very much felt that the book had promised a different story. Rather than truly telling much about the relationship with her father, the great majority of the book dealt with mothering, and then, at the very end, the conclusion to Kuykendall's father story returned, but almost as an after thought.
I felt unfulfilled at the end of the book. Perhaps I would have read this book differently had I been a mother, but at this point in my life, I honestly felt a little disappointed with the book and wished for more of The Artist and less of his daughter's American story.
April 30, 2013
The Artist's Daughter follows the life of Alexandra as she struggles with real life issues. She learned through each of her struggles to trust and lean on The Lord.
As a young girl who didn't have a relationship with her earthly father, she came to find her Heavenly Father. As a young women liking for direction, she came to rely on God as her guide. As a married woman she learned not to only rely on her husband to make her happy, but to give her marriage to God. As a mother she learned to recognize just how much He loves us as His own.
During the first half of the book, Alexandra comes across as a very insecure and needy person... But that's the beauty of it. As she draws closer to The Lord, she becomes the woman God wants her to be. As she gives up herself, she becomes more confident and secure. "Watching" her grow was truly beautiful.
As a mom (who is also a coordinator of MOPS), I felt like I could relate to her on a personal level. Her writing style was easy and made me feel like she was writing her story just for me. I'm sorta BFF's with Alexandra now... Even though she doesn't know me. (Is that creepy?!) The chapters were short and to the point... Perfect for any mom who only has 10 minutes of quiet at a time!
As a young girl who didn't have a relationship with her earthly father, she came to find her Heavenly Father. As a young women liking for direction, she came to rely on God as her guide. As a married woman she learned not to only rely on her husband to make her happy, but to give her marriage to God. As a mother she learned to recognize just how much He loves us as His own.
During the first half of the book, Alexandra comes across as a very insecure and needy person... But that's the beauty of it. As she draws closer to The Lord, she becomes the woman God wants her to be. As she gives up herself, she becomes more confident and secure. "Watching" her grow was truly beautiful.
As a mom (who is also a coordinator of MOPS), I felt like I could relate to her on a personal level. Her writing style was easy and made me feel like she was writing her story just for me. I'm sorta BFF's with Alexandra now... Even though she doesn't know me. (Is that creepy?!) The chapters were short and to the point... Perfect for any mom who only has 10 minutes of quiet at a time!
July 28, 2016
Some years ago, I read the book Fools Rush In, the first of the Weddings by Bella trilogy by Janice Thompson. At first, I wasn't sure why I was reading it, but, after the "You're a deejay" scene, the series had me hook, line, and sinker. Since then, I've read many a Christian romance novel, or other works of Christian literature intended for those of the female persuasion. Despite being a twentysomething unmarried male, it never bothered me that much; I found that I could identify with the protagonists, even if they were of the opposite gender.
However, this particular book made me feel very uncomfortable; the author goes into the gritty details of being pregnant and giving birth, talking about some things which I really didn't want to know. I almost felt this biography should have a warning label: "For Women Only". While female readers may not be bothered by it too much--after all, they've likely lived out what Mrs. Kuykendall talks about--how many guys are going to pick this up expecting a good, triumphant story only to be shocked by what they read?
However, this particular book made me feel very uncomfortable; the author goes into the gritty details of being pregnant and giving birth, talking about some things which I really didn't want to know. I almost felt this biography should have a warning label: "For Women Only". While female readers may not be bothered by it too much--after all, they've likely lived out what Mrs. Kuykendall talks about--how many guys are going to pick this up expecting a good, triumphant story only to be shocked by what they read?
June 21, 2013
Alex Kuykendall and I have opposite backgrounds. She grew up traveling in Europe; I went to Epcot. She wore size 2 jeans; I bought size 2 only when my children outgrew 18 months. Her mom said God "wasn't for her;" my parents had me in three church services a week, Bible drill, church camp, choir practice, GAs... get the picture? Alex is bilingual; I taught English. She had a single mom; my parents have been married since 1970.
However, her experiences and emotions were so similar to mine that I suspected that she had been secretly following me around, taking notes. More than once, I thought, "Really? I'm not the only one who feels that way?" Perfectly written for the intended audience, this memoir shows the commonality among moms in spite of disparate backgrounds.
_The Artist's Daughter_ leads the readers through the gamut of emotions. As I was reading this book in a coffee shop, I started laughing out loud (slightly embarrassing). Later at home, I was sobbing uncontrollably on the couch. I define good writing as something that makes me laugh or makes me cry; therefore, I give this memoir five stars.
However, her experiences and emotions were so similar to mine that I suspected that she had been secretly following me around, taking notes. More than once, I thought, "Really? I'm not the only one who feels that way?" Perfectly written for the intended audience, this memoir shows the commonality among moms in spite of disparate backgrounds.
_The Artist's Daughter_ leads the readers through the gamut of emotions. As I was reading this book in a coffee shop, I started laughing out loud (slightly embarrassing). Later at home, I was sobbing uncontrollably on the couch. I define good writing as something that makes me laugh or makes me cry; therefore, I give this memoir five stars.
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