Wow...this was indeed fierce.
I can only admire Ms. Moss for this beautifully written memoir of how her extremely turbulent childhood affected her adult relationships with men and how she finally was able to break her addiction to unstable, pain-filled relationships. I also admire her for apparently being an excellent mother to her son, although they had to go on food stamps while Ms. Moss struggled to get her art degree. (I was incredulous at how downright mean her neighbors were--the postman who would announce loudly to the neighbors that he was delivering food stamps to her; the mean notes left at her door that she was a parasite, living off the government. Couldn't they see she was working her way through college, with a son to feed? Very sad that they had zero empathy...)
This book gave me a look inside a kind of life that I have been blessed to be unfamiliar with: extreme poverty, alcoholism, violence, and the later-in-life effects it has on the children who survive such childhoods. It was striking to me, how much Barbara and her siblings still loved their father, despite his meanness. It was also quite a revelation how Barbara finally made the connections between her mom's stoic devotion to a very-not-nice-man, and her own addiction to bad relationships. It was as if she were reliving her childhood: because, as an adult, she kept trying to fulfill her need for her dad's affection by falling in love with crazy, mean guys and desperately trying to please them. I am so thankful she got help and worked through that horrible pattern, which she learned from her mother.
As an onlooker, you can say, "She (and people like her) are CRAZY for going back to these abusive/no-good men." And yes, they kind of are. But reading her story helps the reader understand WHY.
Again, I admire Ms. Moss immensely for breaking the cycle. This was a very good book, which I highly recommend. I wish her only the best!