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The Desire Map
The Desire Map program is just that — a program.
Most life-planning tools focus on external attainment and results. Which is valuable. Getting results is what moves your life forward. Except that most goal-setting systems fail to harness the most powerful driver behind any aspiration: your preferred feelings; and they foster an uptight determination that can keep us from the vitality we crave.
The Desire Map program is changing all of that. You could call it holistic life-planning. The inner meets the outer. The spirit drives the material.
The purpose of The Desire Map is:
- Ultimately, to help you remember your light, your true nature, your source.
- To show you your heart’s longing — your core desired - feelings.
- To help you use your core desired feelings as a guidance system for making choices.
- To help you use your desired feelings as a way to access comfort and clarity during painful times.
- To help you accentuate the positive aspects of your life, while still honouring, and not invalidating, the negative parts that you want to change.
- To help you regard your feelings as road signs to your Soul.
So that you can:
- Plan your day, your week, your month, your year and…
- Feel great, making a lot of awesome things happen in every area your life.
Most life-planning tools focus on external attainment and results. Which is valuable. Getting results is what moves your life forward. Except that most goal-setting systems fail to harness the most powerful driver behind any aspiration: your preferred feelings; and they foster an uptight determination that can keep us from the vitality we crave.
The Desire Map program is changing all of that. You could call it holistic life-planning. The inner meets the outer. The spirit drives the material.
The purpose of The Desire Map is:
- Ultimately, to help you remember your light, your true nature, your source.
- To show you your heart’s longing — your core desired - feelings.
- To help you use your core desired feelings as a guidance system for making choices.
- To help you use your desired feelings as a way to access comfort and clarity during painful times.
- To help you accentuate the positive aspects of your life, while still honouring, and not invalidating, the negative parts that you want to change.
- To help you regard your feelings as road signs to your Soul.
So that you can:
- Plan your day, your week, your month, your year and…
- Feel great, making a lot of awesome things happen in every area your life.
288 pages, Unknown Binding
First published December 5, 2012
1190 people are currently reading
10948 people want to read
About the author
Danielle LaPorte
39 books601 followersDanielle LaPorte is a member of Oprah’s SuperSoul 100 a group who, in Oprah Winfrey’s words, “is uniquely connecting the world together with a spiritual energy that matters.”
The former director of a future studies think tank in Washington, DC, where she managed a team creating global scenarios. She now speaks about the intelligence of the heart.
Her most recent book, "How To Be Loving…when your heart is breaking open and the world is waking up" is also an Audiobook + ebook, with a companion deck and journal. Danielle is also the author of The Fire Starter Sessions, The Desire Map, White Hot Truth, and producer of dozens of online programs for spiritual support.
Danielle is the creator of the Heart Centered Membership and the Heart Centered Leaders Program with 400+ leaders in 30 countries hosting conversation circles, retreats, and workshops in all kinds of communities and businesses.
Her podcast, WITH LOVE, DANIELLE, often ranks in iTunes’ top 10 for wellness. Most of her offerings—from the Heart Centered Membership to her online classes—are on a pay what you choose basis. Named one of the Top 100 Websites for Women by Forbes, millions of people a month visit DanielleLaPorte.com.
Marianne Williamson refers to Danielle “as a bright light.” V (formerly known as Eve Ensler) calls her “a force field of energy, wonder, humour, and love.”
Her charities of choice are Ally Global Foundation, helping survivors of human trafficking to rebuild their lives (@allyglobal), Trees Sisters’ reforestation projects (@treesisters_official), and VDay, a movement to end violence against women and girls (vdayorg).
She lives in Vancouver, BC. You can find her on most places on social media @daniellelaporte.
#daniellelaporte #howtobeloving #heartcentered
The former director of a future studies think tank in Washington, DC, where she managed a team creating global scenarios. She now speaks about the intelligence of the heart.
Her most recent book, "How To Be Loving…when your heart is breaking open and the world is waking up" is also an Audiobook + ebook, with a companion deck and journal. Danielle is also the author of The Fire Starter Sessions, The Desire Map, White Hot Truth, and producer of dozens of online programs for spiritual support.
Danielle is the creator of the Heart Centered Membership and the Heart Centered Leaders Program with 400+ leaders in 30 countries hosting conversation circles, retreats, and workshops in all kinds of communities and businesses.
Her podcast, WITH LOVE, DANIELLE, often ranks in iTunes’ top 10 for wellness. Most of her offerings—from the Heart Centered Membership to her online classes—are on a pay what you choose basis. Named one of the Top 100 Websites for Women by Forbes, millions of people a month visit DanielleLaPorte.com.
Marianne Williamson refers to Danielle “as a bright light.” V (formerly known as Eve Ensler) calls her “a force field of energy, wonder, humour, and love.”
Her charities of choice are Ally Global Foundation, helping survivors of human trafficking to rebuild their lives (@allyglobal), Trees Sisters’ reforestation projects (@treesisters_official), and VDay, a movement to end violence against women and girls (vdayorg).
She lives in Vancouver, BC. You can find her on most places on social media @daniellelaporte.
#daniellelaporte #howtobeloving #heartcentered
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 413 reviews
March 28, 2014
I really like the idea of planning goals, intentions, and actions based on how we want to feel. I buy into the idea of not doing something to just complete it but to consider how I'd feel during and after. But that is as much as I got out of this book. The "theory" half has no theory at all. It is a collection of notes written to oneself on post it notes combined into series of sentences and sometimes sentence fragments. Paragraphs were rarely more than two sentences so no thought was fully developed. It's poorly written and not edited. The notes could have become a thoughtful magazine article but they would have had to have been organized. And there isn't enough material for more than a magazine article. How much does one pay for white space (glad I borrowed a library copy)? Using 4-6 fonts on a single page is a visual depiction of the author's being all over the place with no logical process. There is nothing systematic about the process she describes. It's completely non-linear. Perhaps the author should write a book about marketing. That's what she does well.
June 13, 2017
I can't understand why this book became as popular as it did. It is so poorly written and disjointed that it reads like the outline of a book or the author's notes for a book. Here's a taste:
"Words. Feelings. Feeling words. Words that make you feel. Feelings that can be captured in words. We're going to honor the immense power of singular words. Every word is its own universe. Words have never mattered more than they do here." This is the intro to an activity, the directions for which come three excruciating paragraphs later. The. Whole. Book. Is. Like. This.
The actual content, when decipherable, is very rah rah and contains lots of regurgitated information from books like The Secret and Ask and It Is Given, with a rash of quotes thrown in. Basically, the thesis is that in order to "map" your desires, you should focus on how you want to feel, then take actions to feel that way. Let your deepest desires guide you. There, now you can skip this dumpster fire of a book. You're welcome.
"Words. Feelings. Feeling words. Words that make you feel. Feelings that can be captured in words. We're going to honor the immense power of singular words. Every word is its own universe. Words have never mattered more than they do here." This is the intro to an activity, the directions for which come three excruciating paragraphs later. The. Whole. Book. Is. Like. This.
The actual content, when decipherable, is very rah rah and contains lots of regurgitated information from books like The Secret and Ask and It Is Given, with a rash of quotes thrown in. Basically, the thesis is that in order to "map" your desires, you should focus on how you want to feel, then take actions to feel that way. Let your deepest desires guide you. There, now you can skip this dumpster fire of a book. You're welcome.
August 9, 2014
Danielle why do you only ever talk in big font and fragmented sentences? I want to like this author, but I feel like she just yells out bullet points on a power point presentation on every page that are supposed to be ground breaking. They are not. They are, however, frustrating to read.
June 16, 2013
A-M-A-Z-I-N-G!!!!! I. Response to the review before this one, I have something to say...maybe she has no negative reviews because people actually LOVE this book, ever thought of that? #2 you didn't technically pay $170 for just the "paperback" book. You paid for paperback, the workbook, the audio book & MORE! Maybe it is a little overpriced BUT if your mind is open enough too even learn ONE thing that you can apply and change your life, isn't that PRICELESS??? Oh & using most information out there regurgitated with a different spin?? Different people learn in different ways, nothing is really original anymore.
Alright now onto my review...This book changed my life! It freed me from thugs holding me back, I connected deeply to my money issues and what was holding me back. I no longer work if I don't want to and my business doesn't rub my life. And let me just say that I've read 100's of self help books so this isn't my first rodeo.
Danielle your spirit and heart shined through this book, you are a true heart soul, I look forward to meeting you one day and even though you have no idea who I am, I will continue to support you and refer people to The Desire Map.
P.S.
one day you will know me :-)
Alright now onto my review...This book changed my life! It freed me from thugs holding me back, I connected deeply to my money issues and what was holding me back. I no longer work if I don't want to and my business doesn't rub my life. And let me just say that I've read 100's of self help books so this isn't my first rodeo.
Danielle your spirit and heart shined through this book, you are a true heart soul, I look forward to meeting you one day and even though you have no idea who I am, I will continue to support you and refer people to The Desire Map.
P.S.
one day you will know me :-)
August 16, 2015
Well, I think I'm being super generous with 2 stars. I had low expectations with this book but figured I'd check it out on the off chance it was worthwhile. Not surprisingly, it really wasn't.
The "advice" in here is all over the place: contradictory, at times against medical advice (she seems to blow off the idea of depression and anxiety as not needing medical attention), bizarre, slightly sexist, intensely privileged, poorly-researched or supported, all with a weird, vaguely-hinted at Christian undertone. I feel bad shitting on something that must've taken some time to write, but someone should have stopped her about a chapter in and it would've been more worthwhile for her.
The few parts of the book with good advice, translated from feel-good, nonsensical babble, boils down to this: In life, don't rely too heavily on goals and what you you've been told that you SHOULD feel when you're unhappy. Focus on how you want to feel in life and pursue that, though not blindly (though at times she did seem to promote blindly pursuing this so really—who knows).
A last note: As someone with a graphic design background, the typesetting in this book drove me UP THE FUCKING WALL. If anyone else can relate to this, I'd love to talk.
The "advice" in here is all over the place: contradictory, at times against medical advice (she seems to blow off the idea of depression and anxiety as not needing medical attention), bizarre, slightly sexist, intensely privileged, poorly-researched or supported, all with a weird, vaguely-hinted at Christian undertone. I feel bad shitting on something that must've taken some time to write, but someone should have stopped her about a chapter in and it would've been more worthwhile for her.
The few parts of the book with good advice, translated from feel-good, nonsensical babble, boils down to this: In life, don't rely too heavily on goals and what you you've been told that you SHOULD feel when you're unhappy. Focus on how you want to feel in life and pursue that, though not blindly (though at times she did seem to promote blindly pursuing this so really—who knows).
A last note: As someone with a graphic design background, the typesetting in this book drove me UP THE FUCKING WALL. If anyone else can relate to this, I'd love to talk.
May 23, 2024
This book was magical. I've been in a weird place in my life, unable to know exactly what I want, so I found this book at the perfect time. The idea of this book is you're going about getting what you want, wrong. You want the things you want, because of how they make you feel. You should be going after the feeling rather than the goal. I had never heard anything like that, so I was very excited to read this and I wasn't disappointed. Narrowing down feelings and desires really did help me. I know lots of people didn't like this due to the font changes, but I really didn't have a problem with that. Over all I really enjoyed this and do recommend it
August 30, 2014
Meh.
I like a good self-help book, but I'm glad I borrowed this one from a friend. What a bore. It was just a mixmash of feel good, wishy-washy New Age appropriative, unexamined class privilege… Yawn.
I like a good self-help book, but I'm glad I borrowed this one from a friend. What a bore. It was just a mixmash of feel good, wishy-washy New Age appropriative, unexamined class privilege… Yawn.
January 21, 2015
I didn't fall head over heels for Danielle LaPorte or her writing style. I'm a skeptic. But the general idea she presents in this book has changed my world view and I"m constantly sharing the idea and applying it at work (I manage guest services at a wellness spa - this stuff is right up our alley).
I found this book at a time in my life where I was trying to answer the question, "what do I want?" I grew up under strange circumstances and it was incredibly hard for me to define wants and give them a how and why and the not knowing made me a little anxious - maybe a mid life crisis sort of thing but in my early 20s. I read a lot, I meditated, I did various writing exercises but The Desire Map was the biggest help. It gave me tools to define wants and create goals. And then to evaluate those goals and cut things loose when they weren't serving their real purpose with me. A good portion of this book is workbook style and I really do recommend the exercises.
I wish I could recommend this to every manager - looking at those you manage and thinking about what their core desired feelings might be is a huge help in coming up with ways to motivate and support.
I found this book at a time in my life where I was trying to answer the question, "what do I want?" I grew up under strange circumstances and it was incredibly hard for me to define wants and give them a how and why and the not knowing made me a little anxious - maybe a mid life crisis sort of thing but in my early 20s. I read a lot, I meditated, I did various writing exercises but The Desire Map was the biggest help. It gave me tools to define wants and create goals. And then to evaluate those goals and cut things loose when they weren't serving their real purpose with me. A good portion of this book is workbook style and I really do recommend the exercises.
I wish I could recommend this to every manager - looking at those you manage and thinking about what their core desired feelings might be is a huge help in coming up with ways to motivate and support.
February 29, 2020
To save you hours of reading time, I’ll break this down for you.
1. “Map” out your desired life by first identifying how you want to feel
2. Focus your energy in doing things that make you feel that way
3. Tadaaah! Congrats on living your dream life!
I don’t understand how thousands of readers have rated this shady book so highly. But hey, if it brought clarity to your life then good for you... I guess?
My main gripe is that the author is preaching an overly simplistic message on “why everyone should let their deepest desires run their lives” - which I think is dangerous on many levels. Personally, I regard this as pure heresy and my only regret is not having a physical copy to set fire to.
1. “Map” out your desired life by first identifying how you want to feel
2. Focus your energy in doing things that make you feel that way
3. Tadaaah! Congrats on living your dream life!
I don’t understand how thousands of readers have rated this shady book so highly. But hey, if it brought clarity to your life then good for you... I guess?
My main gripe is that the author is preaching an overly simplistic message on “why everyone should let their deepest desires run their lives” - which I think is dangerous on many levels. Personally, I regard this as pure heresy and my only regret is not having a physical copy to set fire to.
January 7, 2013
I wrote a testimonial on her sales page if you would like to read it there.
I LOVE this book. Shifted the way I think about goals, striving, proving myself and desires.
READ IT.
I LOVE this book. Shifted the way I think about goals, striving, proving myself and desires.
READ IT.
March 27, 2015
I’ve never been good at goal setting because I’m not interested increasing my productivity, climbing the corporate or working really hard to get something I really don’t care about. I’m also leery of the find your passion and you’ll find your career genre of self-help. If ya’ll hear of any jobs needing someone to ride her horse in the woods while reading current novels and drinking red wine, please let me know. Every January I get bitten by the “best year yet” bug and find myself with some type of self-reinvention book. This year’s selection “The Desire Map” came to me after eavesdropping on conversation before yoga. I bought the book on Kindle, but couldn’t find the time to work through it as I had too many novels coming in from my library wait list. Something stuck with me, so I got The Desire Map from Audible.
Over the past three months I’ve listened to the book on the way to work. Siri has done a great job of taking my notes as I do the exercise during my commute. Daneille LaPorte presents an interesting approach – focus on how you want to feel and then set your goals. I did the exercises to find my core desired feelings. Some were surprises and some were not. Then I worked on goals for each area of my life so I could continue to generate my desired feeling. Now I have goals that inspire and feed me. I want to feel strong, not meet a number on the scale. I want to be part of a community at work, not continue to increase performance just because. I wasn’t looking to overhaul my life, but I have put more focus on the things that are important to me. A couple of times as I moved towards a being in a frenzy, a negative action or reaction, I have found myself stopping to say, “I don’t want to feel this way” allowing me to change course.
I have always danced to the beat of my own drummer, so this book let me know it was ok to focus on feelings and desires. Funny how sometimes we need permission to let go of silly cultural messages. Even if you say BUNK to all of this, go to Danielle LaPorte’s web site and sign up for her free daily truth bombs. They are worth the price of admission and will make you smile.
Over the past three months I’ve listened to the book on the way to work. Siri has done a great job of taking my notes as I do the exercise during my commute. Daneille LaPorte presents an interesting approach – focus on how you want to feel and then set your goals. I did the exercises to find my core desired feelings. Some were surprises and some were not. Then I worked on goals for each area of my life so I could continue to generate my desired feeling. Now I have goals that inspire and feed me. I want to feel strong, not meet a number on the scale. I want to be part of a community at work, not continue to increase performance just because. I wasn’t looking to overhaul my life, but I have put more focus on the things that are important to me. A couple of times as I moved towards a being in a frenzy, a negative action or reaction, I have found myself stopping to say, “I don’t want to feel this way” allowing me to change course.
I have always danced to the beat of my own drummer, so this book let me know it was ok to focus on feelings and desires. Funny how sometimes we need permission to let go of silly cultural messages. Even if you say BUNK to all of this, go to Danielle LaPorte’s web site and sign up for her free daily truth bombs. They are worth the price of admission and will make you smile.
April 10, 2017
Парадоксально, но книга мне скорее НЕ понравилась :(. Почему парадоксально? На первый взгляд идеи автора совпадают с моими идеями, которые я проповедую в моём "тайм-менеджменте от противного" - что надо планировать свою жизнь и принимать важные решения не в зависимости от жёстко сформулированных на бумаге целей, а гибко, с учетом своего состояния. Но...
Во-первых, ключевая идея книги заключается в том, что надо спросить себя: "Какие чувства/состояния я хочу испытывать?", а потом уже планировать активности своей жизни так, чтобы они позволяли эти самые состояния пережить. Ну-ну... "Планировать эмоции" - нонсенс! Это скорее единичные удачные случаи, когда мы чувствуем именно то, что планировали. Эмоции-то собственно и возникают тогда, когда есть разница между ожидаемой и фактической информацией (см. теорию эмоций П.Симонова). А ещё сомневающимся срочно читать Дэна Гилберта "Спотыкаясь о счастье" или научные монографии по психологии эмоций (так и хочется добавить: "а не эту восторженную чушь!").
Во-вторых, в книге полный винегрет из чувств, эмоций, желаний, неких "истинных желаемых чувств" и т.п. В то время как вполне себе имеются научные классификации эмоциональных феноменов и явлений. А когда появляется "гениальная" авторская терминология, то это всегда попахивает дешёвым гуруизмом - когда термины размыты, их автор всегда оставляет за собой право понимать их "более правильно", чем все остальные. Со всеми вытекающими профитами...
В-третьих, много пафосных слов про то, какими прекрасными являются наши человеческие желания. Блин, дорогая редакция, я тихо фигею! Как будто мимо авторши лесом прошёл весь психоанализ, который из всех направлений современной психологии, с желаниями-то разбирался очень дотошно. Ну и там всё прекрасно у нас, если не обращать внимания на фрейдовский Танатос, фроммовскую некрофилию, адорновский авторитаризм и т.д. и т.п.
Авторша также очень вольно обращается с религиозными традициями, где какие-то авторитеты лично ей сообщили, что ЛЮБЫЕ желания - это очень прекрасно и хорошо. Да лааадно?! А "клеша" в буддизме? А страсти в православии, с которыми монах (да и приличный мирянин тоже) всю жизнь ведёт "мысленную брань"?! А "нафс" в суфизме? И т.д. и т.п.
Короче, у барышни мышление маркетолога - завернуть в красивую обертку, добавить подсластителя, а вы кушайте-лопайте, не думайте, какие там консерванты и прочие яды внутри продукта прячутся :( .
В-четвертых, несмотря на попытки оригинальничать, под обложкой - обычный лайф-коучинг, основанный на авторской "Карте желаний" (КЖ). КЖ - это стандартное "колесо баланса" из 5 жизненных сфер (источники дохода и образ жизни; тело и здоровье; творчество и обучение; взаимоотношения и общество; внутренняя сущность и духовность). Только идея заключается не в том, чтобы балансировать все эти 5 сфер, а в том, чтобы определить (осознать, записать), как вы хотите себя чувствовать в каждой из сфер, и какие именно действия помогут получить именно такое состояние. Т.е. каждая жизненная цель должна идти "от чувства" и должна быть "наполнена чувством". Идея в целом неплохая, и в книге есть даже кое-какие инструменты, но какой-то четкой системы нет, все очень хаотично :( и местами даже противоречит себе.
И последнее... Мне очень не понравился стиль, в котором написана книга. Это такие "заметки эмоционирующей девочки" - всё какими-то обрывками, очень много пафосных и вычурных слов, техники не связаны друг с другом, много бытовых кейсов типа "а вот мы с подругой...", но при этом мало серьезных доводов в пользу предлагаемых тезисов, и т.д. и т.п.
Как ни странно, книгу рекомендую к прочтению, но будьте осторожны. В ней есть правильные мысли, интересные идеи и отдельные техники саморазвития, но нет четкой системы и очень много спорных вещей.
Во-первых, ключевая идея книги заключается в том, что надо спросить себя: "Какие чувства/состояния я хочу испытывать?", а потом уже планировать активности своей жизни так, чтобы они позволяли эти самые состояния пережить. Ну-ну... "Планировать эмоции" - нонсенс! Это скорее единичные удачные случаи, когда мы чувствуем именно то, что планировали. Эмоции-то собственно и возникают тогда, когда есть разница между ожидаемой и фактической информацией (см. теорию эмоций П.Симонова). А ещё сомневающимся срочно читать Дэна Гилберта "Спотыкаясь о счастье" или научные монографии по психологии эмоций (так и хочется добавить: "а не эту восторженную чушь!").
Во-вторых, в книге полный винегрет из чувств, эмоций, желаний, неких "истинных желаемых чувств" и т.п. В то время как вполне себе имеются научные классификации эмоциональных феноменов и явлений. А когда появляется "гениальная" авторская терминология, то это всегда попахивает дешёвым гуруизмом - когда термины размыты, их автор всегда оставляет за собой право понимать их "более правильно", чем все остальные. Со всеми вытекающими профитами...
В-третьих, много пафосных слов про то, какими прекрасными являются наши человеческие желания. Блин, дорогая редакция, я тихо фигею! Как будто мимо авторши лесом прошёл весь психоанализ, который из всех направлений современной психологии, с желаниями-то разбирался очень дотошно. Ну и там всё прекрасно у нас, если не обращать внимания на фрейдовский Танатос, фроммовскую некрофилию, адорновский авторитаризм и т.д. и т.п.
Авторша также очень вольно обращается с религиозными традициями, где какие-то авторитеты лично ей сообщили, что ЛЮБЫЕ желания - это очень прекрасно и хорошо. Да лааадно?! А "клеша" в буддизме? А страсти в православии, с которыми монах (да и приличный мирянин тоже) всю жизнь ведёт "мысленную брань"?! А "нафс" в суфизме? И т.д. и т.п.
Короче, у барышни мышление маркетолога - завернуть в красивую обертку, добавить подсластителя, а вы кушайте-лопайте, не думайте, какие там консерванты и прочие яды внутри продукта прячутся :( .
В-четвертых, несмотря на попытки оригинальничать, под обложкой - обычный лайф-коучинг, основанный на авторской "Карте желаний" (КЖ). КЖ - это стандартное "колесо баланса" из 5 жизненных сфер (источники дохода и образ жизни; тело и здоровье; творчество и обучение; взаимоотношения и общество; внутренняя сущность и духовность). Только идея заключается не в том, чтобы балансировать все эти 5 сфер, а в том, чтобы определить (осознать, записать), как вы хотите себя чувствовать в каждой из сфер, и какие именно действия помогут получить именно такое состояние. Т.е. каждая жизненная цель должна идти "от чувства" и должна быть "наполнена чувством". Идея в целом неплохая, и в книге есть даже кое-какие инструменты, но какой-то четкой системы нет, все очень хаотично :( и местами даже противоречит себе.
И последнее... Мне очень не понравился стиль, в котором написана книга. Это такие "заметки эмоционирующей девочки" - всё какими-то обрывками, очень много пафосных и вычурных слов, техники не связаны друг с другом, много бытовых кейсов типа "а вот мы с подругой...", но при этом мало серьезных доводов в пользу предлагаемых тезисов, и т.д. и т.п.
Как ни странно, книгу рекомендую к прочтению, но будьте осторожны. В ней есть правильные мысли, интересные идеи и отдельные техники саморазвития, но нет четкой системы и очень много спорных вещей.
April 9, 2015
Not as mind blowing for me as it was for other reviewers.
Basically the main take-away is to do what makes you FEEL good.
Do some self-exploration to pin point how you want to feel (your inner desires), and then do things that bring about that feeling.
I also wasn't a huge fan of the small text/layout nor the super informal tone, but that's just me. Also, hard to relate to someone whose yearly goal was to make a million dollars...
Basically the main take-away is to do what makes you FEEL good.
Do some self-exploration to pin point how you want to feel (your inner desires), and then do things that bring about that feeling.
I also wasn't a huge fan of the small text/layout nor the super informal tone, but that's just me. Also, hard to relate to someone whose yearly goal was to make a million dollars...
January 6, 2014
A perfect blend of no-bullshit spirituality that helped as I formed my 2014 intentions. I'm taking The Desire Map with me for the year because I believe in its central premise: that we're not really meant to be chasing goals, only feelings.
October 6, 2023
I first read this book eight years ago and was in exactly the right place for it to be hugely inspirational and influential as I tried to work out what mattered most to me and how to make that knowledge real in the world. At that time, I would have rated the book an easy 4 out of 5.
Fast forward eight years and I’ve read it again. In fact loved it so much the first time that I bought a print copy this time rather than go back to my Kindle. Unfortunately, I’m in a different place and have moved beyond need for The Desire Map. However, if you’re trying to move away from the deadening language of SMART goals and into something that’s more organically about your desires and how you want to feel, this book is highly recommended.
Fast forward eight years and I’ve read it again. In fact loved it so much the first time that I bought a print copy this time rather than go back to my Kindle. Unfortunately, I’m in a different place and have moved beyond need for The Desire Map. However, if you’re trying to move away from the deadening language of SMART goals and into something that’s more organically about your desires and how you want to feel, this book is highly recommended.
June 27, 2015
This has been one of the most useful down to earth books I ve ever had in my hands to explore what I never wanted to see within myself. It guides you on how to deal with fear, anger and not to feel guilty about it. It realy helped me twist my way of seeing things for the better. And everything changed.
April 6, 2025
This book was everything I wanted and more! If you enjoy journaling, this is packed with thought-provoking prompts that really help guide your goal setting. I found the practice of “desire mapping” to be SO helpful and truly something I will tap into for the rest of my life. This is not a book you just read for fun, it’s one you do. And I definitely recommend the audiobook!
January 6, 2018
I've read many books on goal setting. The first one read years ago was Covey 's Seven Habits of Highly Effective People. That book changed how I viewed and lived my life, but the principles were set out very logically and clearly. The Desire Map is in stark contrast to Covey 's work. It might appeal to more of a free spirit type person that appreciates a looser way of coming to goals and decisions than I do. The writing was very stream of consciousness and wordy. I thought the author could have said her entire message in a short essay rather than an entire book. This was not my cup of tea.
April 5, 2021
Analytical types this book is not for us. We need things to be a little more concrete and a little less "free flowing" as someone who really values literature I found her writing style to be chaotic, pointless and rambling.
Having said that I think people that relate more on the emotive side, extenuate their world through their feelings and want to better understand their motives for the goals they are setting would probably benefit from this style.
Its just not for me thanks.
Having said that I think people that relate more on the emotive side, extenuate their world through their feelings and want to better understand their motives for the goals they are setting would probably benefit from this style.
Its just not for me thanks.
August 9, 2020
This book really helped me out, at a time I really needed new perspective on what I wanted. By framing my goals by leaning into the emotions I want to feel in my day to day life, rather than actions or anything else, was an incredible lens to shift my thinking, and most importantly behaviour.
June 2, 2017
Danielle LaPorte is a Gemini and for me it is really difficult not to appreciate a fellow Gemini because I understand the complexity of our zodiac sign as well as my own jyotish. The Leo within me is a powerful and courageous creature addicted to change and reprogramming because I had to teach myself to trust myself after all the numbing predator experiences that I’ve endured, and for me now it is normal that I had changed so much into this breathing living person who is not a single bit the same as I was 6 years ago.
Today I live for sharing kernels of my own truth and discovering my authenticity. I love what I am doing with my life and I love how more and more I am becoming abundant in many areas. I have been fortunate to be able to gather people, hear their stories, decompose some of their shadows through community nurture and I am blessed in knowing that other people’s stories are not my weight and that it is not on me to digest their weight so they could feel better. I did this for majority of my life - until I’ve heard two words which are; hypersensitivity and natural born empath. Until I came to conclusion that me being useful, in the same time feeling great, is amazing combination on which I thrive.
One part of me, which is Leo, is advising me how to say no, yeah, and no to this too, and owning it without feeling shame. My Leo is advising me how to become more fuller, more potential - more solid, more grounded and more truthful but my Gemini side keeps me doing woo woo stuff. It keeps me buying rose and white quartz crystals and necklaces, and it keeps me entertained and awed and intrigued and when my mind is buzzing, it is always from my Gemini side, which is lighter but more nervous version of me. I love my wild and powerful oppositions and how I am so many things in the same time without being too exhausted while dealing with so many sides of my personality. But it took me a decade just to admit some of these things out loud, let alone work on those false belief systems which caused me suffering during my transformative periods.
I can’t even imagine how my life is going to look like in ten years; it echoes circular, rich, grounded and spectacular – simple too? and I want nothing less of me than being able to love what I already do. All my areas are connected with awareness and humbleness and inner power and speaking my own truth while exposing and sharing stories with other people. This is my hook; I love human stories and bonding over them. I used to dig around hurt patches because I hated my story so much until I realised which parts were self condemned lies and which were external experiences that caused me to cave in. Listening to myself gave me ability to appreciate myself more through the skill of active patient listening. And when I finally heard myself and started healing, it was the most natural bridge to start doing this with other people.
It took me five years of non-stop work and 300 free custom made workshops with people who allowed themselves to see in me what I couldn’t see because it was too dark. Yet, they listened while I read and taught, while I was teaching them teaching myself. I have worked with all my four bodies to cure myself not because I knew what I was doing, nor because I knew that anyone in the world was doing this. In the starting period it felt too much of everything; I was just victimising myself more with vulnerability and self sabotage because I felt I would never succeed in doing something I didn’t even know what I was doing, because there is no goal, as you don’t know what is ahead of you.
But there was this burning desire to move and change. A wind that I’ve never felt previously. I was being led into something grander and every single pull was directing me.
I understand now that I was being guided but at the time, I felt so much shame being so hurt and wounded. I needed to create a new community with the people who didn’t know anything about me. I didn’t know that I needed community, I didn’t know what was pushing me forward, but it was - or I am going to end my life or I am going to try to become more visible due to my conscious and deliberate choices.
I didn’t want to be left choiceless because of the ache caused by the person who I loved the most, and who killed himself a few months ago. I didn’t want to be choiceless because of him who left me with his dark legacy. I didn’t want it, and during the first few months I had a very difficult time comprehending despair of losing him, let alone the fact that nobody wanted to talk to me because of the ‘too much misery’ element.
Running away and killing myself too, felt too easy because it would have hurt my family, but I had become the swamp of self loathing pinched with toxic peoplephobia. I was being judged relentlessly and I felt I had let him down because he protected me from himself. Society became handy since it was merciless to show me how unworthy I was.
I knew he was the best person I knew, but he as well killed himself. So what is my influence in all of it? Where was my big love story when I didn’t see those dark shades after 9 years together. He was sweet, loving and beautiful; he was the gentlest person and I adored him. He wasn’t flawless in my eyes but he was compatible with my flaws. Our love was not faked. We were not fake. I was not faking myself with him. Six years later I see him now clearly with the biggest help sign, but at the time I didn’t know because I couldn’t have known.
After his death, my life mission instantly changed, and although I vigorously hated everything connected with life, the only way I knew how to explain myself, was to fill my shoes with the bigger version of me who doesn’t contemplate her own suicide. And the role was me being a teacher, which I already was, and which I have been for half of my life anyway. Teaching was my second nature. And that is why I never took money for my workshops until I finally started resonating with what I was teaching. 300 free workshops with continuous flow of new people. Every week for 5 years.
It was unbearably difficult. I judged myself so much and I was blindsided with unintentional blindness that came with unimaginable grief and bereavement. I didn’t know that I didn’t know but I had this vague mission in my head which was pure energy. I didn’t know what I was doing and why I was doing all these free workshops, but I felt this hurricane somewhere along my edges. A hurricane of pure bliss and power and courage which frightened me the most as I was primarily teaching myself how to become free. I had to work on all my bodies: mental, emotional and physical to finally connect it with my spirituality to see the meaning within this incarnation.
So for me now it is very easy to say how proud I am of myself, and how his love became the biggest gift of my life because he gave me awareness of my full potential. As I go further with my life I become less attached to our story, although it is a great story as we had a gorgeous life since he was my perfect human being. He was my karmic star-crossed love, but I don’t suffer anymore because of his death. I miss him, but he doesn’t pull me down neither he has a reign over me; anything about him isn't terrible anymore. He is present but he's not dominant at all. Because in death you understand the intention of a big lesson; they are never supposed to be gruelling for a long time.
I am not a light weight person, I didn’t choose to be born in a light weight surrounding full of external certainties and for me life is still not a breeze. But I do like it a lot, as I really had to teach myself to become a person who I appreciate - now, when my mind doesn’t haunt me and when I feel grateful for all my experiences.
So, for me it is really impossible not to click with Danielle LaPorte because when she speaks using too many adjectives and nouns, I see myself. And I love journals and written progresses - things that you have to do with a pen. I love daily practices and I love days when I just say, oh fuck off, you and affirmative chants, what I need is sex, beer and Stephen Colbert. Or not. Or what I need is grumpy and aching me who says, screw you life... thank you life. no, fuck you. (but still thanks.)
Once, I was on this female empowering and strength through our stories workshop, and a teacher told me that the biggest crime for me would be to be sent to a workshop where I couldn’t speak. That is why vipassana meditation retreat is still one of the hardest things I could do to myself deliberately.
Danielle LaPorte is very important for spiritually awakened women of west. She is vocal and intense and doesn’t give a fuck, while she gives too much fuck while not being darkly motivated. She is my kind of woman.
Yeah. I see vipassana is ahead of me.
Today I live for sharing kernels of my own truth and discovering my authenticity. I love what I am doing with my life and I love how more and more I am becoming abundant in many areas. I have been fortunate to be able to gather people, hear their stories, decompose some of their shadows through community nurture and I am blessed in knowing that other people’s stories are not my weight and that it is not on me to digest their weight so they could feel better. I did this for majority of my life - until I’ve heard two words which are; hypersensitivity and natural born empath. Until I came to conclusion that me being useful, in the same time feeling great, is amazing combination on which I thrive.
One part of me, which is Leo, is advising me how to say no, yeah, and no to this too, and owning it without feeling shame. My Leo is advising me how to become more fuller, more potential - more solid, more grounded and more truthful but my Gemini side keeps me doing woo woo stuff. It keeps me buying rose and white quartz crystals and necklaces, and it keeps me entertained and awed and intrigued and when my mind is buzzing, it is always from my Gemini side, which is lighter but more nervous version of me. I love my wild and powerful oppositions and how I am so many things in the same time without being too exhausted while dealing with so many sides of my personality. But it took me a decade just to admit some of these things out loud, let alone work on those false belief systems which caused me suffering during my transformative periods.
I can’t even imagine how my life is going to look like in ten years; it echoes circular, rich, grounded and spectacular – simple too? and I want nothing less of me than being able to love what I already do. All my areas are connected with awareness and humbleness and inner power and speaking my own truth while exposing and sharing stories with other people. This is my hook; I love human stories and bonding over them. I used to dig around hurt patches because I hated my story so much until I realised which parts were self condemned lies and which were external experiences that caused me to cave in. Listening to myself gave me ability to appreciate myself more through the skill of active patient listening. And when I finally heard myself and started healing, it was the most natural bridge to start doing this with other people.
It took me five years of non-stop work and 300 free custom made workshops with people who allowed themselves to see in me what I couldn’t see because it was too dark. Yet, they listened while I read and taught, while I was teaching them teaching myself. I have worked with all my four bodies to cure myself not because I knew what I was doing, nor because I knew that anyone in the world was doing this. In the starting period it felt too much of everything; I was just victimising myself more with vulnerability and self sabotage because I felt I would never succeed in doing something I didn’t even know what I was doing, because there is no goal, as you don’t know what is ahead of you.
But there was this burning desire to move and change. A wind that I’ve never felt previously. I was being led into something grander and every single pull was directing me.
I understand now that I was being guided but at the time, I felt so much shame being so hurt and wounded. I needed to create a new community with the people who didn’t know anything about me. I didn’t know that I needed community, I didn’t know what was pushing me forward, but it was - or I am going to end my life or I am going to try to become more visible due to my conscious and deliberate choices.
I didn’t want to be left choiceless because of the ache caused by the person who I loved the most, and who killed himself a few months ago. I didn’t want to be choiceless because of him who left me with his dark legacy. I didn’t want it, and during the first few months I had a very difficult time comprehending despair of losing him, let alone the fact that nobody wanted to talk to me because of the ‘too much misery’ element.
Running away and killing myself too, felt too easy because it would have hurt my family, but I had become the swamp of self loathing pinched with toxic peoplephobia. I was being judged relentlessly and I felt I had let him down because he protected me from himself. Society became handy since it was merciless to show me how unworthy I was.
I knew he was the best person I knew, but he as well killed himself. So what is my influence in all of it? Where was my big love story when I didn’t see those dark shades after 9 years together. He was sweet, loving and beautiful; he was the gentlest person and I adored him. He wasn’t flawless in my eyes but he was compatible with my flaws. Our love was not faked. We were not fake. I was not faking myself with him. Six years later I see him now clearly with the biggest help sign, but at the time I didn’t know because I couldn’t have known.
After his death, my life mission instantly changed, and although I vigorously hated everything connected with life, the only way I knew how to explain myself, was to fill my shoes with the bigger version of me who doesn’t contemplate her own suicide. And the role was me being a teacher, which I already was, and which I have been for half of my life anyway. Teaching was my second nature. And that is why I never took money for my workshops until I finally started resonating with what I was teaching. 300 free workshops with continuous flow of new people. Every week for 5 years.
It was unbearably difficult. I judged myself so much and I was blindsided with unintentional blindness that came with unimaginable grief and bereavement. I didn’t know that I didn’t know but I had this vague mission in my head which was pure energy. I didn’t know what I was doing and why I was doing all these free workshops, but I felt this hurricane somewhere along my edges. A hurricane of pure bliss and power and courage which frightened me the most as I was primarily teaching myself how to become free. I had to work on all my bodies: mental, emotional and physical to finally connect it with my spirituality to see the meaning within this incarnation.
So for me now it is very easy to say how proud I am of myself, and how his love became the biggest gift of my life because he gave me awareness of my full potential. As I go further with my life I become less attached to our story, although it is a great story as we had a gorgeous life since he was my perfect human being. He was my karmic star-crossed love, but I don’t suffer anymore because of his death. I miss him, but he doesn’t pull me down neither he has a reign over me; anything about him isn't terrible anymore. He is present but he's not dominant at all. Because in death you understand the intention of a big lesson; they are never supposed to be gruelling for a long time.
I am not a light weight person, I didn’t choose to be born in a light weight surrounding full of external certainties and for me life is still not a breeze. But I do like it a lot, as I really had to teach myself to become a person who I appreciate - now, when my mind doesn’t haunt me and when I feel grateful for all my experiences.
So, for me it is really impossible not to click with Danielle LaPorte because when she speaks using too many adjectives and nouns, I see myself. And I love journals and written progresses - things that you have to do with a pen. I love daily practices and I love days when I just say, oh fuck off, you and affirmative chants, what I need is sex, beer and Stephen Colbert. Or not. Or what I need is grumpy and aching me who says, screw you life... thank you life. no, fuck you. (but still thanks.)
Once, I was on this female empowering and strength through our stories workshop, and a teacher told me that the biggest crime for me would be to be sent to a workshop where I couldn’t speak. That is why vipassana meditation retreat is still one of the hardest things I could do to myself deliberately.
Danielle LaPorte is very important for spiritually awakened women of west. She is vocal and intense and doesn’t give a fuck, while she gives too much fuck while not being darkly motivated. She is my kind of woman.
Yeah. I see vipassana is ahead of me.
August 31, 2022
The reread is finally, finally done - after the longest time!
It's funny, for the last 30% of the book, I procrastinated a LOT because it's the workbook part. I had to make myself sit down and do the exercises. And I'm so glad I did, because it not only led me to clarify my core desired feelings but - which is just as important, if not more - I was also able to resume my daily journalling habit which I'd lost for the past few months (or, roughly, a year).
For a spiritual book (the subtitle says it's "a guide to creating goals with soul"), this was equally practical and down-to-earth. Danielle LaPorte's prose may be poetic (and soulful, and wild, and very pretty) but her advice is concrete, realistic, doable (and at the same time, flexible!).
I loved the various quotes she includes at the start of chapters/sections within chapters. She's not a university graduate - in fact, she doesn't have a very high opinion of the education system - but she's well read; through her advice, you can see the wisdom and discernment and personal experience that has allowed her to come to this point.
Filled with relatable examples, poetic power, soul-stirring advice and compassion, The Desire Map is the only spiritual book you'll ever need to read - and reread; because the concept of your personal "core desired feelings" fueling your goals is revolutionary yet simple, and it's the only thing you need to know, and return to, whenever you feel like the goals you've set for yourself are no longer motivating you.
Core desires come before goals. When goals aren't working, you need to go back to your original motivation, which is to feel good in certain ways that are personal to you. This basic concept has made so much difference in my life. Rereading The Desire Map and going through the process of rediscovering what my core desires are, is one of the best decision I made this year.
Happily recommend this book for spiritual readers who don't want to let go of goals but are looking for a more intuitive, livelier perspective on goal setting. Danielle LaPorte delivers just that through this divine little gem called The Desire Map.
It's funny, for the last 30% of the book, I procrastinated a LOT because it's the workbook part. I had to make myself sit down and do the exercises. And I'm so glad I did, because it not only led me to clarify my core desired feelings but - which is just as important, if not more - I was also able to resume my daily journalling habit which I'd lost for the past few months (or, roughly, a year).
For a spiritual book (the subtitle says it's "a guide to creating goals with soul"), this was equally practical and down-to-earth. Danielle LaPorte's prose may be poetic (and soulful, and wild, and very pretty) but her advice is concrete, realistic, doable (and at the same time, flexible!).
I loved the various quotes she includes at the start of chapters/sections within chapters. She's not a university graduate - in fact, she doesn't have a very high opinion of the education system - but she's well read; through her advice, you can see the wisdom and discernment and personal experience that has allowed her to come to this point.
Filled with relatable examples, poetic power, soul-stirring advice and compassion, The Desire Map is the only spiritual book you'll ever need to read - and reread; because the concept of your personal "core desired feelings" fueling your goals is revolutionary yet simple, and it's the only thing you need to know, and return to, whenever you feel like the goals you've set for yourself are no longer motivating you.
Core desires come before goals. When goals aren't working, you need to go back to your original motivation, which is to feel good in certain ways that are personal to you. This basic concept has made so much difference in my life. Rereading The Desire Map and going through the process of rediscovering what my core desires are, is one of the best decision I made this year.
Happily recommend this book for spiritual readers who don't want to let go of goals but are looking for a more intuitive, livelier perspective on goal setting. Danielle LaPorte delivers just that through this divine little gem called The Desire Map.
February 26, 2020
This book made me feel good and that's why I am giving it 4 stars. It changed my mood, regardless of its writing, font, structure, etc. Sometimes a book is all about how it makes you feel and less about publishing technicalities.
January 6, 2014
I have been searching for the words that could adequately express the way this book lights me up, but it seems like they have escaped me. Except one. LOVE.
I love this book. I love the way it guided me. I love the way I FEEL after reading and working through it.
Love, love, love, abundant love. Love is what I gained from this book and what I want to pour out of me after reading it.
The question was simple: 'How do you want to feel?' But it allowed me to also get to the heart of what I was already feeling. And why. This isn't just some self-help book. And it isn't some goal-management system either. It's about 'less proving and more living.' And it's about homing in on what really matters to you. If your goals are leaving you feeing empty, unfilled, or worn down it's time to turn them inside out.
Do yourself a favor and read this book. You deserve it.
NOTE: previous reviews have lamented over the high cost- THIS IS NO LONGER THE CASE! The book is no longer part of a $170 program- but can be bought individually for $22. And it's worth far more.
I love this book. I love the way it guided me. I love the way I FEEL after reading and working through it.
Love, love, love, abundant love. Love is what I gained from this book and what I want to pour out of me after reading it.
The question was simple: 'How do you want to feel?' But it allowed me to also get to the heart of what I was already feeling. And why. This isn't just some self-help book. And it isn't some goal-management system either. It's about 'less proving and more living.' And it's about homing in on what really matters to you. If your goals are leaving you feeing empty, unfilled, or worn down it's time to turn them inside out.
Do yourself a favor and read this book. You deserve it.
NOTE: previous reviews have lamented over the high cost- THIS IS NO LONGER THE CASE! The book is no longer part of a $170 program- but can be bought individually for $22. And it's worth far more.
March 28, 2014
I really like the idea of planning goals, intentions, and actions based on how we want to feel. I buy into the idea of not doing something to just complete it but to consider how I'd feel during and after. But that is as much as I got out of this book. The "theory" half has no theory at all. It is a collection of notes written to oneself on post it notes combined into series of sentences and sometimes sentence fragments. Paragraphs were rarely more than two sentences so no thought was fully developed. It's poorly written and not edited. The notes could have become a thoughtful magazine article but they would have had to have been organized. And there isn't enough material for more than a magazine article. How much does one pay for white space (glad I borrowed a library copy)? Using 4-6 fonts on a single page is a visual depiction of the author's being all over the place with no logical process. There is nothing systematic about the process she describes. It's completely non-linear. Perhaps the author should write a book about marketing. That's what she does well.
February 9, 2017
I bought the audible version of the book which was a great idea because.... her voice is magnificent.
I listened to the book driving to and from work and since the whole book was 6 and a half hours, I easily finished it within a week!
I was already sold on the concept of core desired feelings but the process of going through each area of your life exploring your CDFs, while a little bit painstaking, is really good and necessary to do the process justice.
Really pleased to also hear she has the same goal-setting process as I do :)
I would recommend it IF you have the deep desire to set your intentions/ goals in a meaningful way so you're chasing the right things for the right reasons.
I listened to the book driving to and from work and since the whole book was 6 and a half hours, I easily finished it within a week!
I was already sold on the concept of core desired feelings but the process of going through each area of your life exploring your CDFs, while a little bit painstaking, is really good and necessary to do the process justice.
Really pleased to also hear she has the same goal-setting process as I do :)
I would recommend it IF you have the deep desire to set your intentions/ goals in a meaningful way so you're chasing the right things for the right reasons.
April 10, 2015
A woman I respect was raving about this book, so I borrowed it from the library. It had a few thought-provoking questions, but overall it wasn't really worth the time it took to get through it. There was a lot of fluff, foul language, filler, and awful writing. Philosophically, it's my opinion that this type of selfish thinking is one of the reasons our world is so messed up. Our lives are about more than ourselves. If more of us looked beyond the end of our own noses, we'd all be better off.
August 3, 2014
I've read many a "self-help" book and gotten, well... about midway through and stopped due to lack of inspiration and a feeling of meh. The Desire Map felt like a bible - sacred, intentional, as if LaPorte dictated from the Divine and touched on Truth. Fantastic. This book will be gifted to family, friends and clients alike.
May 27, 2016
Reading non-fiction is hard for me. Reading self-help books is hard for me. I have to admit I did not do the workbook portion of this book. But I am claiming to have read it because I spent a lot of time on it, and I liked it, and it helped me.
March 2, 2014
amazing shift in my life & opened my Soul to my Core Desired Feelings. Grateful to have found it.
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