When Pain Is the Doorway: Awakening in the Most Difficult Circumstances

by Pema Chödrön

What if the full sense of our aliveness were only to be found in the labyrinth of our most challenging times and difficult experiences? Amid pain and crisis, teaches Pema Chodron, there lies a hidden miracle, a doorway to freedom that appears to us only when we're sure that there is no way out.

In these intimate audio learning sessions, Pema Chodron begins by helping us to distinguish the "triggers" or external events that we blame for our suff ering from the deeper habitual patterns that are feeding our anger, fear, or sadness. From this understanding, we then learn how to free ourselves from our propensity to suff er through the transformative awareness of impermanence-the dynamic and ever-shifting nature of both joy and suff ering, self and selfl essness-and the absolute and eternal fl ow from which all of it arises.

"What is causing my pain? What will happen if I simply lean in, keep company with it, hold it with tenderness?" Moment by moment, Pema supports and encourages listeners to bring an open-hearted sense of curiosity and welcoming to our apparently impossible situations or unbearable relationships-to discover the deeper freedom available just beneath the surface.

For those experiencing emotional crisis, When Pain Is the Doorway provides expert guidance to help us stop, stay present, and enter into a more welcoming, spacious place of being that is our true home.

Genres: Buddhism, Spirituality, Nonfiction, Philosophy, Audiobook

Audiobook

First published May 1, 2013

About the author

Ani Pema Chödrön (Deirdre Blomfield-Brown) is an American Buddhist nun in the Tibetan tradition, closely associated with the Kagyu school and the Shambhala lineage.

She attended Miss Porter's School in Connecticut and graduated from the University of California at Berkeley. She taught as an elementary school teacher for many years in both New Mexico and California. Pema has two children and three grandchildren.

While in her mid-thirties, she traveled to the French Alps and encountered Lama Chime Rinpoche, with whom she studied for several years. She became a novice nun in 1974 while studying with Lama Chime in London. His Holiness the Sixteenth Karmapa came to England at that time, and Ani Pema received her ordination from him.

Ani Pema first met her root guru, Chögyam Trungpa Rinpoche, in 1972. Lama Chime encouraged her to work with Trungpa, and it was with him that she ultimately made her most profound connection, studying with him from 1974 until his death in 1987. At the request of the Sixteenth Karmapa, she received the full bikshuni ordination in the Chinese lineage of Buddhism in 1981 in Hong Kong.

Ani Pema served as the director of the Karma Dzong, in Boulder, CO, until moving in 1984 to rural Cape Breton, Nova Scotia to be the director of Gampo Abbey. Chögyam Trungpa Rinpoche gave her explicit instructions on establishing this monastery for western monks and nuns.

Ani Pema currently teaches in the United States and Canada and plans for an increased amount of time in solitary retreat under the guidance of Venerable Dzigar Kongtrul Rinpoche.

Reviews

[Daniel Gargallo · Rating 3 out of 5]

I found this book beneficial for my life. She lays forward several concepts that are very good at disrupting the ego, in other words when you process a lot of what she says it tends to disrupt your ego in a way that brought me some immediate, though temporary, peace and hope. I think this teaching has the potential to be very useful down the road outside of meditation. This was my introduction to her and I’ve already picked up more of her materials.

[Laura · Rating 5 out of 5]

Pema’s compassion to the most difficult circumstances is the finest teacher of them all.
Listen to this book on tape when you are feeling your worst you will feel a lift of spirit. She helps you face yourself .

[Luann Ritsema · Rating 3 out of 5]

Recommended to me by someone I trust and who knows me well. I'm listening to it rather than reading. So far I like it more than I expected to though I do sometimes find myself saying aloud "Ok, I get your point, NEXT." But a few real nuggets to ponder so far.

Finished up. I'm not that transcendental anymore, I guess. But I did pick up one or two really interesting points to ponder -- so that's always worth a few hours of my time.

[Billye · Rating 4 out of 5]

I learned so much from this! Pema Chödrön presents concepts that can be difficult to understand in a very accessible way. She is willing to go 'there' to help her audience to benefit through practice and understanding. The format consists of a set of presentations, each followed by Q and A. The presenter and the audience members who ask the questions are well-spoken and engaging. I would recommend this Audiobook to anyone who is seeking ways to cope and expand one's consciousness, peace, and understanding in the most difficult and challenging circumstances.

[Madison Buchanan · Rating 5 out of 5]

Summary (I still recommend listening to the real deal)
“The wisdom of no escape” is that you have the choice to brace against the difficulty, or surrendering. Letting go brings freedom.
Fear is not a problem, it is an emotion. It will pass because everything is impermanent. (Sub any difficult emotion for fear)

[Becky And · Rating 5 out of 5]

Pema, is an encapsulating-teacher of how to survive anything by learning to embrace it. Her style of teaching mindfulness I believe is in a way anyone can find an answer to a fulfilling life of compassion, an item that these days it’s become very difficult to find in ourselves. Believe Pema, she has the best answer to finding peace with your emotions daily.

[Heather · Rating 4 out of 5]

Many of the concepts explored in Don’t Bite the Hook are also addressed in these dharma talks, but in a bit less detail. The idea of selflessness though, was particularly useful, as was the idea of practicing in a charnel ground. The object really is to shed one’s ego and find spacious awareness.

[Robert · Rating 3 out of 5]

A shorter and less roaming talk from Pema Chödrön. Speaking of pain (all kinds but mainly spiritual/emotional) and how one can grow through this.

[Julie Ringrose · Rating 4 out of 5]

I love her sense of humour and use of stories to make her point.

[Laura Siegel · Rating 5 out of 5]

I listen to something by this amazing offer every morning. She is an inspiration.

[Blanche · Rating 4 out of 5]

3.75 Audio book. There were a few ahha moments and take aways during this audio session but I didn't connect with this one like I was expecting to.

[Boxia Wang · Rating 5 out of 5]

triggers vs. propensity
very inspiring and practical to check during daily life

[Kimberly · Rating 5 out of 5]

I should probably listen to this one a few times over. I love Pema ❤️

[Lindsay Michel · Rating 5 out of 5]

Always so in touch ❤️

[Margaret Eagler · Rating 5 out of 5]

Changed the way I see progress, change, and growth.

[Ryan · Rating 5 out of 5]

This audiobook consists of two of Pema's talks. The audio quality on the first talk is much clearer than the quality of the second, but regardless the ground she covers is classically Pema: insightful, well-paced and causing reflection. Pema comments that the cessation of pain is what motivates many people to action. She talks about discovering the underlying causes of our negative emotions by examining what triggers these emotions, and then experiencing them directly--like your hand on a hot burner--and without writing a narrative about what we are feeling.

[Heather Brush · Rating 4 out of 5]

Will have to revisit a few times, I think.

[Amy · Rating 4 out of 5]

Reread

[Sonia Allison · Rating 5 out of 5]

Best teaching on charnel ground and hospice work of preparing to die with kindness. Love.

[Teo · Rating 2 out of 5]

2019.05.12–2019.05.12

Chödrön P (2013) (01:55) When Pain is the Doorway - Awakening in the Most Difficult Circumstances

[LemontreeLime · Rating 3 out of 5]

Pema's always a good one to listen to.