Talking About Death Won't Kill You

by Virginia B. Morris

With its wise and very compelling argument that we should face death before it faces us, Talking About Death Won't Kill You addresses cultural, personal, medical, and legal concerns to find a way for us-as individuals, and as a society-to prepare for a good death, a death where the dying are in control and not, as is too often the case, caught in a downward spiral of medical intervention and misunderstood intentions. It is an argument for facing fears. An argument for taking the thought of our death out of the shadows of denial and preparing, with our loved ones, the living wills, medical directives, value history forms, and even simple letters that will explain what it truly is we want when the time comes. It is an argument for honest diagnosis, for hospice care, for creating rituals, for finding love and comfort at the end instead of false hope and forbidding technology. With its skillful interweaving of personal stories and practical matters, scientific fact and spiritual sensitivity, Talking About Death Won't Kill You is a powerful book about how we can achieve a greater sense of peace in dying, and so rediscover the art of living.

Genres: Nonfiction, Psychology

320 pages, Hardcover

First published September 10, 2001

Reviews

[Martha · Rating 5 out of 5]

Despite the awful title, this is an extremely useful book. Studies show that people with advanced directives (living wills), health care powers of attorney, and DNRs end up with just as many life-prolonging measures that lead to a painful, lonely death--not the natural death they desire. How can that be? This book examines the multiple factors that contribute and provides insights on how to handle situations when you or your family member is faced with difficult health-care choices.

[Rhyena · Rating 3 out of 5]

This book was fine but the field of end of life has evolved and there are much better books that do the same in a more contemporary way. This book at least shows how far we have come in 20 years and that is to be relished. It is people like this author who helped the culture of death and dying progress and open up!

[Elle · Rating 4 out of 5]

Should be requisite reading.

[Barb Wiseberg · Rating 5 out of 5]

Excellent, excellent book!!!!

[Malin Friess · Rating 3 out of 5]

As expected...a sad but informative book.

[Alisa · Rating 4 out of 5]

although everything in the book was not applicable to me, the parts that were, are very important. I plan to buy the book (i read a library edition) and mark it up and share it with family members.

[Landis]

This book is essentially broken down into two sections. The first section I would give four stars, whereas the second section I would only grant two.

In the first section, the author presents a gripping philosophy about death, and what it means to 'die well'. This philosophy is complemented by real-life stories displaying the difference between a 'good' and 'bad' death in today's society. What is most frightening, however, is realizing the propensity of 'bad deaths' in contemporary American culture. We no longer know how to 'die well,' and we are nearly forbidden to explore the possibility of changing that fact.

The second section of the book is a practical how-to guide, with steps that any individual can take toward a 'good death' for themselves, or for a loved one. While this is fascinating and important information, the dry factual nature of many of these chapters pale compared to the emotional power that is present in the first section of the book.

[Charlotte · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book will help the reader face the death of a loved one or one's own death in a more positive manner. I loved the author's statement on page 70 "In the end, it is not the act of dying, but all those final moments of living that are truly important." This book helps us with those final moments of living.