Hands Are Not for Hitting

Best Behavior

by Martine Agassi, Marieka Heinlen (Illustrations)

Simple words and colorful pictures teach little ones that violence is never okay, hands can do many good things, and everyone is capable of positive, loving actions. A note to parents and caregivers includes tips for redirecting toddlers' frustrated energy and intervening when they hit.

Genres: Childrens, Picture Books, Parenting, Nonfiction, Kids, School

24 pages, Kindle Edition

First published January 1, 2002

Reviews

[Prabhjot Kaur · Rating 4 out of 5]

Hands are for playing, learning, doing and building.
Hands are not for hitting. Hitting is never okay.

This is such a good book with a very important message to children and grown ups alike. It tells of all the ways hands can be used but they are never to be used for hitting anyone. There's a note at the end A Word to Grown-Ups talking about violence in our culture and discussion starters and activities which I also enjoyed. It has lovely, inclusive illustrations.

4 stars

[stevie jo · Rating 3 out of 5]

For a little background story, I work with children that have issues with behavior (such as hitting). A friend was hitting so we sat down and read this story together. The result: more hitting. I don't think they appreciated it lmao

[Cristina Quattrone]

Please let this work, Lord

[Kimberly · Rating 4 out of 5]

We read this one with my toddler because he was starting to hit when he got frustrated with us. I am happy to report that this book definitely did help with the problem. Now when we see him getting ready to lash out, we say, "What are our hands for?" and he usually comes up with something from the book as a response. Not too shabby!

Edited to add that four years later I am once again reading this with a grouchy toddler, and it holds up!

[Carrie]

She loves the boy playing "itsy bitsy spider" and the girl playing with mud. I also said "cute boots" on the picture of the mom the first time we read this, and now she also says "Cute boots!" almost every time we read it. :)

[Emily · Rating 4 out of 5]

OK, yes, it’s too early, but I do have four little hands in the house.

[Macy Shea]

No questions please… 🤣

[Sarah - All The Book Blog Names Are Taken · Rating 5 out of 5]

Okay, so the first time I showed this to my two year old before we read it, and I said the title, she hit the book. But we have read it several times, and it has reinforced the idea that I have been saying for the last few months: hands are for 'hugs and hi', not hitting. She does not really have a problem hitting, though sometimes when she gets really upset and can't get the words out, she does throw or hit. Luckily it is not a regular occurrence but this will help support what I have been teaching her.

[Sandy · Rating 4 out of 5]

This series of books always starts with the positive. Hands are wonderful. And they come in all different shapes and sizes. Hands can do all kinds of amazing things. Waving is mentioned, but the page shows hands making symbols or ASL signs ("I love you" and "okay"), crossing fingers, shadow puppets, holding maracas, and even an animal paw. Hands are not for hitting is introduced early. And then some alternate uses for hands are listed: saying hello, drawing, playing, the itsy bitsy spider, and building. Repetition: hands are not for hitting. And then more proper uses of hands are listed: eating and drinking, dressing and undressing, keeping safe, taking care, and brushing teeth. Again: hands are not for hitting. Even more proper uses: helping, hugging, and waving goodbye.

The repetition is important for children. I do wish that addressing some of the reasons why a child might feel compelled to use their hands for hitting had been included and discussed.

This book was dual language, meaning that the English words were on the page, followed by the Spanish interpretation. This isn't super important for me. I am teaching my kids English only right now. Although I do plan for them to learn a second language at some point. I know enough Spanish to be able to read in Spanish if necessary--although my pronunciation probably needs some work. But if having this included is meaningful to you, then I thought you should know.

Hands Are Not for Hitting is a good option for very young kids. I liked the repetition of the concept, but I do wish some of the emotions behind wanting to hit were addressed. My children are a little old for this book, but the concept is timeless. Hands Are Not for Hitting gets 4 Stars. Have you or your child read Hands Are Not for Hitting? What did you think? Let me know!

[Nayaab Faysal · Rating 5 out of 5]

The best book about teaching manners. I found it really helpful when my first born was just 6 month old. And after that my all kids followed the same book. And we used to say whenever any child is angry .. Hands are not for .... Hitting.”
For parents it’s necessary to introduce books like this to our kids to help and teach them good manners. They’ll understand the value able manners and will understand the task which we do with our hands. I really recommend this book to every parent who are really concerned about good parenting. I really like the whole set from Martine Agassi about different manners and task.

[Mary Greer Thomas · Rating 4 out of 5]

Great book for teaching preschoolers how to play and learn. This book also teaches self discipline and social skills. This book has a wealth of information for very young children and is colorful and engaging. This is an excellent book as it guides children on when, how, and where they should use their hands. Children hear about how others feeling and emotions are effected when hands are used inappropriately. It also guides children into making good and sound choices, judgment and decision about using their hands.

[Kelsey · Rating 4 out of 5]

This series is really great! It’s very informative and it teaches children very well because it uses the right level of vocabulary and is presented in an engaging way. I especially love all of the advice for parents listed at the end of each book and the size of the book (the pages are quite large). My only criticism is that the board book pages are thinner than is typical for a board book, and I’m worried that these books won’t hold up to the antics of an excited toddler (which is who they’re written for).

[Paige Aguilar · Rating 5 out of 5]

storybook, lesson learned

This book teaches children that violence is never the answer. The book shows creative ways to show kids better outlets for their anger. It teaches children that their hands can be used for better activities such as playing, making music, or learning.

This is a storybook that teaches children a valued lesson. You can tell this is a storybook for children because of the limited amount of words on each page. There is a lesson to be learned and the book has characters with a problem and a solution. The age range is 0 to 3 years old also.

[Arpita (world of a book enthusiast) · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is a wonderful early childhood book (Ages 0-3). This book illustrates that hands can help us do so many amazing things like saying hello, eating and drinking, taking care of ourselves and others and so many marvelous things and they should not be used for hitting someone.

The illustrations of the book are delightful and outstanding. It conveys the message to the young minds in a way they can understand.

[Alethea · Rating 5 out of 5]

Made our "memorable" list for 2022 as now applicable to both of our kids. Our youngest, not quite 2, loves the various "hands" (that also include paws) and likes to emphasize the page for keeping safe - holding hands to cross the street. Our older kiddo, at 4.5 loves embracing all the positive things hands can do and also enjoys "teaching" his sister about the message. A total win for family reading aloud!

[Theediscerning · Rating 4 out of 5]

A very early read that might encourage the end of the violent use of hands – there are, after all, so many positive and useful things here that they could be doing instead. It's not trying to get deep into why hands might be used in nasty ways – it's not allowing itself to get deep into anything, so brief is it – but it should lead by example. Until it ends up in pieces when someone's anger is taken out on it… Bilingual Spanish/English, too, but then you noticed that.

[Savannah Webster · Rating 4 out of 5]

Little ones have big thoughts and feelings but they are still working on expressing them. They are learning how to deal with others listening or not listening to them; understanding patience and accepting rejection. This book gives some positive activities to do with your hands versus the negative activities such as hitting. It's an easy read for toddlers through preschool age.

[Luvy Webb · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book is a great book to help teach children the appropriate behavior for hands. I would read this book to young preschool age children to help them understand what their hands are for and how many different ways they are able to use them. This book is also a great way to teach these young ones how to read with the illustrations so large the pictures are easy to attach the words to them.

[Kimberly Molina · Rating 5 out of 5]

I think this book is an essential in my opinion. You never know what is happening at home so this simple book really encourages positive outcomes for children. It teaches them that their hands are not to inflict hurt onto other but instead shows children the many countless POSITIVE & PEACEFUL outcomes when dealing with others. It helps to enforce positive behaviors in children.

[Tianna Lee · Rating 5 out of 5]

i love this book because it promotes teaching children as early as possible that violence is never okay, your hands can be used for many other great things besides hitting someone and hurting them. i would recommend this book for any parent who struggles with a naturally physical child. some kids are a lot more rough than others.

[Mayra Harrison · Rating 5 out of 5]

Great book to read to children 2 and up. this book lets children know that hands are not for hitting but other great ways to use your hands. Sometimes you need to talk to a child in your classroom about keeping their hands to themself without embarrassing them in the classroom so reading this book in a group would be a great way to talk to everyone about keeping your hand to yourself.

[Ashlynn · Rating 5 out of 5]

What are hands for? This book shows young children good things they can do with their hands and teaches socially appropriate behaviors to do instead of hitting. With very cute pictures, this book is a favorite of my 4 year old.

[Sean Benson · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a fantastic book for parents trying to deal with aggressive children.
It's a fun exploration of all the things they can do with their hands instead of hitting people.
This is a book to read and explore regularly, not just a once off

[Kristina · Rating 3 out of 5]

We pull this book into our classroom when a child starts hitting for fun. The child hears the different ways they can use their hands appropriately compared to being harmful with them. They enjoy seeing and trying to do some of the funny things the children do in the illustrations of the book.

[Jon-David · Rating 3 out of 5]

I don't like focusing on what I don't want my toddler to do, so ignore the parts about hitting and just read what hands are for and act it out with my 18 months old son. He loves doing all the actions with me along with the book.

[Jessica Buchanan · Rating 4 out of 5]

I like this book because it is important for children to know at any age, that they shouldn't use violence to solve their problems. We can use our words and try to find a resolution a different way, not by hitting and hurting our classmates.

[June Kang · Rating 5 out of 5]

I think this book was creative in the way that it was telling children that hands are not for hitting and what they are for, along with pictures illustrating why people use hands, so children can appropriately use their hands.

[Kathryn · Rating 4 out of 5]

This behavioral book about what hands could be used for instead of hitting really helped my son during his fight and flight threes. Now that he’s four he still enjoys reading this book for fun and he’s often reflecting on his improved behavior.

[Karina · Rating 5 out of 5]

It has some interesting suggestions for parents at the end. We liked the suggestion that when we notice a child getting frustrated to turn it into a mad dance and funny sounds. Sometimes (if we catch it in time) it works.

[Debbie Reads · Rating 3 out of 5]

Had to teach my kinders a lesson about hitting and how hands aren't for hitting and this book is suitable for all ages. Message across so I hope that now my kids understand hitting is not nice and that we can express our feelings with words, leave the situation when we are upset.