I'll Ask You Three Times, Are You OK?: Tales of Driving and Being Driven

by Naomi Shihab Nye

"I am a poet," I said. "It is my destiny to do strange things."

My father gripped the wheel of his car. "I am the chauffeur for foolishness."

We said no more.

Foolhardy missions. Life-altering conversations. Gifts—given and received. Loss. Getting lost. Wisdom delivered before dawn and deep into the night. Love and kissing (not necessarily in that order). Laughter. Rides on the edge. Roses. Ghosts.

As a traveling poet and visiting teacher, Naomi Shihab Nye has spent a considerable amount of time in cars, both driving and being driven. Her observations, stories, encounters, and escapades—and the kernels of truth she gathers from them—are laugh-out-loud funny, deeply moving, and unforgettable. Buckle up.

Genres: Nonfiction, Memoir, Travel, Short Stories, Essays, Poetry, Biography Memoir

256 pages, Hardcover

First published September 1, 2007

About the author

Naomi Shihab Nye was born to a Palestinian father and an American mother. During her high school years, she lived in Ramallah in Jordan, the Old City in Jerusalem, and San Antonio, Texas, where she later received her B.A. in English and world religions from Trinity University. She is a novelist, poet and songwriter.

She currently lives in San Antonio, Texas. She was elected a Chancellor of the Academy of American Poets in 2010.

Reviews

[Beth · Rating 5 out of 5]

I first heard Nye read her poems on Prairie Home Companion some years ago. I thought she was terrific and meant to go out and find her books...and didn't. This one was recommended to me, and while it's not her poetry but instead a kind of book of essays (really, lots of stories), it's highly entertaining. I'm not sure exactly why it's being marketed as YA. I think my teenage niece, just learning to drive, might enjoy it, but it is still strongly an adult voice, that is, a little nostalgic for youth, with a grown-up view of the world. That could certainly work for some teen readers, of course, but it's a bit unusual for that genre in my experience. Nonetheless, a great read.

[Elizabeth Andrew · Rating 4 out of 5]

I'm not sure how to categorize I'LL ASK YOU THREE TIMES because I've never read a book like it. Which makes me extra glad the publisher took it on; so few are willing to take risks like this. Shihab Nye's slender volume is a quirky collection of narratives, most of which are encounters with taxi drivers on her travels, all of which take place in or around cars. Even though most of the stories are from her adulthood, I suspect they're aimed at teens--they're mostly fun, although a few push the edge of emotion and risk-taking but in a wonderfully safe way. I'm always game to inhabit Shihab Nye's warm sensibility.

[Julie · Rating 5 out of 5]

There are some people that are energized and recharged by travel. They talk to people, they're interested in people - this is a book for those people (who have been homebound a little too long). A joy, a delight, prose from a poet and it set my heart to soar.

[Sam · Rating 3 out of 5]

The author is perceptive but a tad self righteous. I also feel like the class aspect of riding around in cabs is never addressed. She's a respected, name dropping poet paying immigrants and demanding their stories without acknowledging the circumstances that have lifted her above the working class while still sympathizing with them.
I enjoyed the book but felt irritated throughout the second half.

[Sheena · Rating 3 out of 5]

DNF. Only got about 1/3 through. The writing was fine. An easy read. The chapters/stories are short and easy to read a few and then stop. But I just couldn’t stay engaged. Her writing style was sometimes novelic, with details and a smooth progression of the story. And other times jumpy and more poetic. Ultimately, the stories just couldn’t keep my interest. They felt shallow and pointless. I wasn’t getting anything out of it, even as just a light read.

[Barry Bridges · Rating 4 out of 5]

Our family has this weird thing about accidentally having meaningful conversations in cars. Then to my surprise I discover another San Antonio resident who has life-altering, deeply meaningful conversations in cars. A pleasurable and thought-provoking collection of car experiences well worth the ride along.

[Valerie Nelson · Rating 5 out of 5]

I've never done this before; I haven't finished reading "Are You OK?" and have rated it 5 out of 5. I saw this book at the library when I was picking up a Susan Orleans book. I can't say why this called out to me, but I'm so glad it did. The driving and being driven theme ties what feels like a stream of consciousness book, almost like talking with a friend who jumps from idea to idea. I love it!

[Joan · Rating 4 out of 5]

Mildly entertaining look at both national and international travel mainly in cabs by a poet. Nye sees things differently from the average American traveler and is able to connect with almost every cab driver she meets.

[Danielle Palmer]

DNF. Really disjointed. The author jumps from subject to subject with barely a paragraph on each thought. This seems more like a journal of story ideas she had than an actual book. I had an uncorrected proof, so they may have been part of the problem? I’m guessing so, because usually I love Naomi!

[Arthur · Rating 1 out of 5]

Perhaps it is because she is a poet and used to expressing much in a few words, but the entries are too short. In paring down to what Nye must think is essential, she cuts out all context that is intriguing, engaging, or interesting.

Boring.

[Pachyderm Bookworm · Rating 5 out of 5]

Do you know the way to San Jose? With these essaysabout driving and being driven, it seems the author actually does, and so will you as you navigate those highways and byways of her extraordinary life whilst perusing, cruising, and otherwise reading and re-reading this book. Wonderful.

[Jmp · Rating 5 out of 5]

Lively collection of essays of being on the road -- driving, taxis, people met, trips taken. Some joyful. All thoughtful & touching. Yay

[Kris Dersch · Rating 4 out of 5]

Every bit as delightful as its title. I love this author, and her stories about life on the road are well worth the read.

[Susan · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book made me so happy. Each story had humor and pathos and longing and humor...did I say humor?

I want to stand on a street corner all day and just tell people to read this book.

[Goshen Public Library · Rating 5 out of 5]

"My mother used to tell me when I went somewhere, "Please leave your foolishness at home!" But how could I do that? It was stuck to me." - recommended by Wanda

[Heidi Bakk-Hansen · Rating 4 out of 5]

A pleasant surprise. Funny, quirky--just what I needed right at this moment.

[Jennifer Messmer · Rating 3 out of 5]

Ok book. Nothing stood out but it wasn’t bad. She has travelled a lot and it’s cool to read about

[Kendra · Rating 5 out of 5]

loved the shared theme of all the stories. really easy to read. sometimes funny and sometimes thought provoking.

[Barbara · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is a wonderful little book of short essays/stories drawn from the author’s experiences of “driving & being driven”—from conversations with taxi drivers to the random woman who gets in her car at the drugstore. I love Nye’s poetry, and from reading articles she’s written & hearing interviews with her, I just love the way she is. She has a wonderful curiosity about people, and a way of connecting with others that comes across beautifully here.

[Tiffany · Rating 4 out of 5]

I really enjoyed this book...very interesting and thought provoking. Makes me want to experience things and write about them. I love how little vignittes (sp?) can make you think a long time and can leave a lasting impression!! Some of my fav quotes:

"Mystery: Everything felt better before you got there than when you actually got there. When you actually got there, you didn't quite have the energy to be there."

" I told him the poets said something very interesting about politics. They said, " In Scotland, we never take ourselves too seriously, we're just a satellite of a monarchy, you know, so how could we? And we think anyone who runs for political office can't really have good intentions up his sleeve. Surely he or she is doing it for some ulterior motive. So we're pretty cynical in general about politics and if someone turns out to be good and honorable, we're pleasantly surprised. But you, in the United States, you want to believe in your politicians and that's why you're always so depressed and disappointed."

[Toni Moore · Rating 3 out of 5]

This is a slight, but entertaining, book by noted poet Naomi Shihab Nye. It's a series of vignettes about her many travels by taxi in cities throughout the world and the adventures she had on these taxi rides. Most entries are just two or three pages (in big type) long. I read the entire book in a couple of hours. At one point, I almost stopped reading it because it was so superficial. But then the short stories started to draw me in. Many of the taxi drivers Nye meets are real characters. Often they are very insightful; sometimes she discovers that she and the taxi driver have an interest in common, like the one in New Jersey who often drives celebrities around but is in awe of Bruce Springsteen because of his music and because he's a down-home kind of guy. Somehow the cumulative effect of these vignettes comes together at the end of the book. I'm glad I read it.

[Robyn Roscoe · Rating 5 out of 5]

I don't recall how I came to this book - likely another Facebook item. This is a well done collection of personal essays and memoirs by an active writer, teacher and poet based on her travels throughout the US and world. She writes here primarily about her experiences with taxis, especially their drivers - what they say, where they're from, and how they affect her. Although this collection is from 2007, it was very relevant to read it now, as many of the drivers she meets and describes are immigrants (and many from the Middle East); their stories are especially poignant in the current environment. There also a memorable driver from New York with a pretty low opinion of now-President Trump. Her stories about her own driving are also highly entertaining. An elegant and engaging writing style, with well crafted vignettes of life as a passenger, made this a delightful read.

[Melody · Rating 4 out of 5]

I have no idea why this book was lurking in the YA section of my library. Not that it's inappropriate for teens, just that it doesn't strike me as YA at all. That being said, it's a lovely little memoir primarily of Nye's taxi rides. Her voice is singular and fresh, and the people she encounters are transcendent. Her perspective is delightfully skewed, and her writing is fearlessly goofy. I picked it up on a whim and I feel lucky to have done so. Recommended for travelers and philosophers and poetical sorts.

[Rachel Smith · Rating 3 out of 5]

I'm not sure what I was expecting from this book, but it wasn't terrible, but not my favorite either. I love how Nye talks about the many different places she's travelled, and it made me want to see more of the world and learn more about the people we have brief contacts with, but other than that, it was okay. I'm not sure if all of her writing is similar to this, but it's very conversational and you definitely get the feeling that she makes an effort to connect with her audience, which is nice.

[Laurie · Rating 4 out of 5]

Key quotes:

"Anticipation jingled and smelled like vanilla. Arrival clunked. Huh? This is the place?...I don't think so. Let's get back on the road. It took a while for the reality of being somewhere to replace the anticipation of being there. Better standing baCK, just imagining." p. 24

"I like Scottish highway signs: Please allow overtaking -- frustration causes accidents and queues likely ahead and tiredness can kill." p. 104

[Lulu Flanagan · Rating 5 out of 5]

After listening to a fascinating interview with Krista Tippet's Onbeing program, I picked up several books by Naomi Shihab Nye. I picked up a copy at a local library (Duluth, MN) and read it that very afternoon. Talk about delightful storyteller! The theme in this collection is "tales of driving and being driven". Naomi writes as a keen observer of the human race with a sense of humor. It was pure delight. Highly recommended.

[Donnae · Rating 5 out of 5]

I am a fan of Naomi Shihab Nye's poetry, so I was really curious to read her prose. I was completely delighted with all of the stories she included in the book; so delighted that I am going to recommend it to the teens at the writing workshop I am teaching this summer. She has a way of capturing modern life that inspires me to write about my own.

[Tara · Rating 3 out of 5]

I picked this one up from the library. Her writing style is very similar to how my mind works. Nye's extensive travels reflect how people are very similar even around the world. She is able to enjoy the time it takes to get from one place to another. She seems to have an uncanny ability to be content whatever the circumstances.

[Karen · Rating 5 out of 5]

I loved this book. It was a quick read, too quick, one of those delicious books consumed too fast followed by post-book depression. Well, maybe not "depression." Nye describes the world/life using snapshots of experiences while driving or being driven - most but not all while traveling. Her openness to others is contagious.

[Jill · Rating 3 out of 5]

I love the way Nye can perfectly capture a feeling and find something big in everything small. As usual, I left her writing wishing I could "put myself out there" the way that she does because it seems her free spirit just attracts everyday magic. That said, I loved the concept of short stories about coming and going, but felt that more than a couple were a little rambling and disjointed.