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F**k It Therapy: The Profane Way to Profound Happiness
"Ma vaf..." Se tutti imparassero a usare nel modo giusto, liberatorio e non aggressivo, questa espressione, probabilmente ci sarebbero meno medici, meno psicologi e, perché no?, il mondo sarebbe migliore: meno stress, meno tensioni, più leggerezza e più armonia. Quante volte ci siamo fasciati inutilmente la testa, ci siamo persi in un bicchier d'acqua, abbiamo ingigantito problemi in realtà banali, siamo stati assaliti da ansie o timori ingiustificati? Tante, troppe volte. Invece dovremmo imparare a dare il giusto peso alle cose. Lo sanno bene coloro che hanno vissuto esperienze drammatiche: prendersela per le piccole «rogne» di tutti i giorni non ha senso, ci avvelena solo la vita. È questo il messaggio liberatorio, appunto, che John Parkin e Gaia Pollini vogliono trasmetterci con il loro libro, che, ricco di suggerimenti, esempi pratici e tecniche da provare subito, ci guiderà su una strada nuova, per imparare ad apprezzare la vita in ogni momento per ciò che è, non per come vorremmo che fosse.
360 pages, Paperback
First published January 1, 2012
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1413 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 81 reviews
November 24, 2012
I'm not quite sure what to make of this book. On one hand, I feel that Parkin (and his wife, who worked on this book with him) took a simple idea that essentially wasn't terribly difficult to grasp and piled on a bunch of unnecessary layers. Why? Cynical me says, "Well, duh, to sell another book and to hawk their retreats and their website and his music and whatever other accoutrements they can because, hey, that's what people do with 'self-help breakthroughs' these days--take a pretty basic notion, pile on the layers, pile on the merchandising and sell, sell, sell!" Not-so-cynical me counters, "Well, Parkin admits at one point in the book that since writing the first book, he's had some seven years' experience sharing and developing his notion, thus it's evolved, and he wants to share that evolution with folks--and even clear up or possibly refute some stuff in the first book he didn't get quite right."
Which leads me to the feelings I have about the book counter to the first. This book is possibly aimed at those people out there who haven't flirted much with various "healing" and "self-discovery" and "enlightenment" ideas/techniques/modalities/methods/crackpot theories who thus possibly have difficulty seeing the simplicity of *F**k It* and need some additional explanations. Sometimes it's nice to be taken by the hand and led through something. Sometimes that can be incredibly frustrating because *you already f'in get the point, so why muck it up with all this yammering?*
I think this book I might have to revisit at some point, maybe ingest it a bit more slowly, maybe even take time to do some of the suggested exercises. Then again, maybe not. I was really excited after reading *F**k It*, sort of like how I was so excited and energized when I really discovered yoga (on my third attempt). In my rush to embrace all that yoga could be, I burned myself out because there are so many layers that people have put onto yoga over the years, and I grew resentful that these people had taken something pretty basic at its heart and made it complicated and contradictory and given it this false, slick veneer just to make a buck. I didn't want the same thing to happen with the excitement and with the energy I felt after reading *F**k It* -- I didn't want to get burned out by overanaalzying, overthinking it. That fear, I have no doubt, prejudiced me against this book--or at the very least had me wary.
Oh well. F**k it. It's just a book.
Which leads me to the feelings I have about the book counter to the first. This book is possibly aimed at those people out there who haven't flirted much with various "healing" and "self-discovery" and "enlightenment" ideas/techniques/modalities/methods/crackpot theories who thus possibly have difficulty seeing the simplicity of *F**k It* and need some additional explanations. Sometimes it's nice to be taken by the hand and led through something. Sometimes that can be incredibly frustrating because *you already f'in get the point, so why muck it up with all this yammering?*
I think this book I might have to revisit at some point, maybe ingest it a bit more slowly, maybe even take time to do some of the suggested exercises. Then again, maybe not. I was really excited after reading *F**k It*, sort of like how I was so excited and energized when I really discovered yoga (on my third attempt). In my rush to embrace all that yoga could be, I burned myself out because there are so many layers that people have put onto yoga over the years, and I grew resentful that these people had taken something pretty basic at its heart and made it complicated and contradictory and given it this false, slick veneer just to make a buck. I didn't want the same thing to happen with the excitement and with the energy I felt after reading *F**k It* -- I didn't want to get burned out by overanaalzying, overthinking it. That fear, I have no doubt, prejudiced me against this book--or at the very least had me wary.
Oh well. F**k it. It's just a book.
September 20, 2017
In the very beginning of the book the core advice was given: We need to say F**k It to those things that really don't matter so much, and focus on those that do. I'm a quick learner. After reading about one third of the book I said F**k It, browsed the rest very quickly and that's it. Didn't like the style of the writing although liked the message. Why write 300 pages when you could have managed with 30? Can't recommend.
August 28, 2013
My mother always said that people show their IQs with how they speak and that vulgarity shows a poor vocabulary. I never bought into that theory. I am a psychologist, with a Ph.D., who graduated from a seminary, who often sounds like she spent time as sailor. So, when I saw a book called Fuck It Therapy, I assumed it was right up my alley. Unfortunately, I did not find that to be the case. It started with the need to do away with the asterisks in the word Fuck. On the cover, it might have been cute, but considering the number of times that the author actually uses the word fuck in the book, it just became annoying. I had a similar experience with the footnotes. Finally, there was a lot of meandering in this text. I have seen other reviewers comment on this as a "spiritual" text. If that is your context, perhaps this makes more sense for you as a narrative from your guru. As any other form of writing, it needed editing.
November 28, 2012
F**k it Therapy by John C. Parkin is going to help a lot of people. Wherever you are in life, you know that stress has a stranglehold on a great number of us. Not good, considering stress is the number one killer nowadays. John offers many techniques to help you escape from the self imposed prisons we check ourselves into. The prisons of fear, self-doubt, perfectionism and many more are looked at in great detail. I found the sections dealing with the ancient art of qigong particularly refreshing. Taking something sacred and powerful, and presenting it in a unique, down to earth, fun, and naughty way is just f**king brilliant. There is great magic in those two little words "f**k it" that I can't really put my finger on to describe, but the author sums it up perfectly. I recommend you give this book a shot, but take it slow. There is a lot going on within these 316 pages, powerful processes, and even some links for helpful, exclusive online content. There is a brief section on diet and exercise, which I didn't particularly care for, but it's only a short three pages. Overall, this is a fantastic, thought provoking read. I received this book for free from Hay House Publishing for review purposes.
April 23, 2018
I found it to be a lot of words but not a lot said. Perhaps having gone through "operation simplify my life" many years ago, I wasn't in the right head space to need this type of intervention. There were a number of tangents that I think were to be entertaining but really weren't. I guess if someone is really stuck in their life and looking to explore an attitude like this, it might be helpful, but I found the concept very simplistic and superficial.
July 17, 2020
I disliked this with a vengeance.
Ugh.
Ugh.
July 25, 2013
I went on a f**k it week around 3 years ago
A year ago I left my well paid job and career to try to do something more fun
I've had lots of fun but haven't found the way to turn this into a living, much less the motivation to start a business. So I was wavering a needed a boost. Reading this has reminded me of a lot of good stuff. I won't say that I should or shouldn't be doing. But it was relaxing to read in a few hot summer days while chilling in my garden not worrying about the rapid depletion of my savings.
And I won't say that lo! A miracle occurred, but slowly ideas are coming, opportunities are presenting. It will all be ok. And indeed, it already is. And that's f**k it!
A year ago I left my well paid job and career to try to do something more fun
I've had lots of fun but haven't found the way to turn this into a living, much less the motivation to start a business. So I was wavering a needed a boost. Reading this has reminded me of a lot of good stuff. I won't say that I should or shouldn't be doing. But it was relaxing to read in a few hot summer days while chilling in my garden not worrying about the rapid depletion of my savings.
And I won't say that lo! A miracle occurred, but slowly ideas are coming, opportunities are presenting. It will all be ok. And indeed, it already is. And that's f**k it!
January 29, 2018
Simple, basic ideas dressed up to fill the space between the front and back covers.
The writing style is painfully glib (long-time readers of Private Eye will recognise an echo of the St Albion Parish News). There is little or no structure to the book (to an extent that is actually really annoying) and each point is laboured to such an extent that you’re left with little will to keep going.
I got two thirds of the way through the book, realised it wasn’t going to get any better, and decided to follow the advice in the title.
Overall, self-impressed and clumsy.
The writing style is painfully glib (long-time readers of Private Eye will recognise an echo of the St Albion Parish News). There is little or no structure to the book (to an extent that is actually really annoying) and each point is laboured to such an extent that you’re left with little will to keep going.
I got two thirds of the way through the book, realised it wasn’t going to get any better, and decided to follow the advice in the title.
Overall, self-impressed and clumsy.
August 24, 2015
OK but not more. The book is basically an ad for the authors' retreats, workshops, and the like. I kinda liked the whole "fuck it" approach and the "prisons" we may find ourselves in but the book could be heavily edited for length. Parkin often rants about random things that irritates him. I can't really recommend this book to anyone as there are better books in the same venue (with a stronger scientific base).
February 17, 2024
Fajne bylo, przeczytałem w kerfurze
June 7, 2016
This is a 2 and a half...
The thing is that there is a lot of useful stuff in this book-really positive things about being more aware of your feelings, not worrying so much about the small stuff-thinking about what you are grateful for-things that I might actually use.
What I didn't like is that I felt that it was written for middle-age (ish) men who have made lots of money. I did not feel like the author really understood me-it was written for men, not because the author was sexist...just because that was the style and the general feel of the book and it was definitely directed at rich people:
I'll give an example-on page 246 the author asks 'do you need to continue to earn to live?' and then asks 'Do you need to earn as much as you do now to live?'. He goes on to suggest that 99% of us would answer yes to the first question but many of us will answer no to the second. He then goes on to give advice or words of wisdom to the 'many'... Not a word to those who have answered 'yes' to both questions. He makes the assumption that his readers are all well off individuals who can afford to cut back on working and can focus on other things. So..what about the single mums? The low income familes? The unemployed? All those who are struggling? It is not aimed at these.
An example given of someone who has been on one of these 'fuck it' retreats (there are abour 4 of these in the book)-it talks about after getting out of the retreat and realising that he needs to not worry so much-buys himself a porshe. I mean-I get that some people will have this reaction to being on a reatreat and deciding that life is too short and you should do what you want. But this is the example they choose to be an inspiration to others? This guy did so well on the retreat that he bought himself a porshe!?
ah well, Fuck it! x
The thing is that there is a lot of useful stuff in this book-really positive things about being more aware of your feelings, not worrying so much about the small stuff-thinking about what you are grateful for-things that I might actually use.
What I didn't like is that I felt that it was written for middle-age (ish) men who have made lots of money. I did not feel like the author really understood me-it was written for men, not because the author was sexist...just because that was the style and the general feel of the book and it was definitely directed at rich people:
I'll give an example-on page 246 the author asks 'do you need to continue to earn to live?' and then asks 'Do you need to earn as much as you do now to live?'. He goes on to suggest that 99% of us would answer yes to the first question but many of us will answer no to the second. He then goes on to give advice or words of wisdom to the 'many'... Not a word to those who have answered 'yes' to both questions. He makes the assumption that his readers are all well off individuals who can afford to cut back on working and can focus on other things. So..what about the single mums? The low income familes? The unemployed? All those who are struggling? It is not aimed at these.
An example given of someone who has been on one of these 'fuck it' retreats (there are abour 4 of these in the book)-it talks about after getting out of the retreat and realising that he needs to not worry so much-buys himself a porshe. I mean-I get that some people will have this reaction to being on a reatreat and deciding that life is too short and you should do what you want. But this is the example they choose to be an inspiration to others? This guy did so well on the retreat that he bought himself a porshe!?
ah well, Fuck it! x
February 28, 2016
"Sometimes you just gotta say, 'What the f**k!'"
Okay, you movie fans (and probably older ones) will probably recognize that line from the Tom Cruise movie Risky Business, and saying 'what the f**k' to life's trials and vicissitudes is the general idea conveyed in F**k It Therapy.
I mean, there's something to the idea. Life ultimately can seem pretty absurd and saying 'what the f**k' sometimes fits right in with that absurdity. The book, however, tries to delve into this idea in depth, but really the idea is pretty simple, and I found the book's attempt to do so was pretty scattershot in its approach.
The author holds 'f**k it' therapy sessions in an idyllic Italian setting, which I suppose would help any kind of therapy be effective. (Alas, I couldn't attend and only read the book on my elliptical trainer on my freezing porch in suburban Chicago.)
Anyway, here's the 'f**k it' philosophy in a nutshell:
Okay, true enough, but did we really need a whole book to convey this?
Okay, you movie fans (and probably older ones) will probably recognize that line from the Tom Cruise movie Risky Business, and saying 'what the f**k' to life's trials and vicissitudes is the general idea conveyed in F**k It Therapy.
I mean, there's something to the idea. Life ultimately can seem pretty absurd and saying 'what the f**k' sometimes fits right in with that absurdity. The book, however, tries to delve into this idea in depth, but really the idea is pretty simple, and I found the book's attempt to do so was pretty scattershot in its approach.
The author holds 'f**k it' therapy sessions in an idyllic Italian setting, which I suppose would help any kind of therapy be effective. (Alas, I couldn't attend and only read the book on my elliptical trainer on my freezing porch in suburban Chicago.)
Anyway, here's the 'f**k it' philosophy in a nutshell:
...the problem for most of us is that we worry about things that, with even a litte bit of perspective, REALLY DON'T MATTER...
Okay, true enough, but did we really need a whole book to convey this?
February 13, 2016
Combining ideas from Buddhism, nihilism, stoicism, Taoism, and minimalism, "Fuck It Therapy" reads like a version of Fight Club Lite, minus the fisticuffs. Parkin, a former London marketing executive argues that the complexity of life and our accompanying thoughts, routines and goals creates our own unique prisons. Saying ‘fuck it” and surrendering to the path of least resistance is a profound, simple and liberating alternative to freeing ourselves from that which does not serve our greater purpose and fulfilment. Over the past few weeks of saying "fuck it", I've found that it really works. Saying fuck it takes the pressure off and puts the small stuff in perspective. Recommended irreverent existentialism for the modern age and a good synthesis of ideas from a spectrum of philosophies and disciplines.
November 16, 2012
A great book for those of us stuck worrying about things that are not really important in the grand scheme of things. Just say F**kIt and see what happens. More importantly buy this book and see how much it will change your life like it has mine.
I have all of John's books and have even had the great pleasure to meet him as well. I have even purchased his first book for a friend who was going through some difficult times. He loved it and it has really helped him like John's books have helped me. Thanks again John.
I have all of John's books and have even had the great pleasure to meet him as well. I have even purchased his first book for a friend who was going through some difficult times. He loved it and it has really helped him like John's books have helped me. Thanks again John.
December 28, 2015
Couldn't give it 3.5 stars hence the more conservative 3 star. Nothing new if someone is already initiated in the Great Eastern Philosophical Thought schools. At times feels excessively juvenile, but well, fuck it.
December 29, 2022
I read this after it was recommended by my therapist.
I felt this was book delivered some really important overall messages, particularly with the 'prison' metaphor and the philosophy surrounding 'the more relaxed you are, the more likely you are to see things clearly'. I have also tabbed some of the exercises to refer as I think I'll often refer back to these to aid in decision making.
The book did meander a little at times and some of the concepts reported weren't novel. Despite this, I really enjoyed reading Parkin's thoughts and being reminded the importance of letting go sometimes.
I felt this was book delivered some really important overall messages, particularly with the 'prison' metaphor and the philosophy surrounding 'the more relaxed you are, the more likely you are to see things clearly'. I have also tabbed some of the exercises to refer as I think I'll often refer back to these to aid in decision making.
The book did meander a little at times and some of the concepts reported weren't novel. Despite this, I really enjoyed reading Parkin's thoughts and being reminded the importance of letting go sometimes.
January 4, 2020
Lighthearted, but hard going
March 17, 2013
Firstly this is a good concept. Before I opened the book I started saying F**k It to random things and already felt a bit better.
The book gives good reasons why using this method is helpful, but when you get down to the nitty gritty it doesn't tell you HOW! It almost seems as if the book is just one big advert to steer you in the direction of one of the author's retreats or to join the new online course he is offering. There is no definite advice on how to benefit from the method but it seems to me that it is a combination of Tai Chi/ QiGong, mindfulness, being "in the moment" and just being open to trying stuff to see if it works. Apart from Tai Chi I've already tried the things mentioned and it hasn't worked for me I'm afraid.
The book gives good reasons why using this method is helpful, but when you get down to the nitty gritty it doesn't tell you HOW! It almost seems as if the book is just one big advert to steer you in the direction of one of the author's retreats or to join the new online course he is offering. There is no definite advice on how to benefit from the method but it seems to me that it is a combination of Tai Chi/ QiGong, mindfulness, being "in the moment" and just being open to trying stuff to see if it works. Apart from Tai Chi I've already tried the things mentioned and it hasn't worked for me I'm afraid.
March 1, 2015
After a difficult few weeks I found myself drawn to this book while browsing Waterstones. I had never before come across a self-help book that made me want to highlight comments and sections, but that's exactly what I did with this one. It's a bit long, but well broken up and makes a number of points that I strongly related to so chances are I will be coming back to this book at some point in the future.
September 11, 2015
This book advocates a F**k it approach to life that not only reduces stress, assists in perspective, gives yourself permission (not) to act or care, but also feels good. The tone is weirdly jokey boyo humour but when you wade through that there are also some seriously good reminders about meditating and energy. This was a great read for me at exactly the right time when I am mightily pissed off: f**k it is the perfect response.
May 2, 2016
About one third into this book I thought f**k it, I really, really, really get the picture now. The retreats might be fabulous, the author might be considered as funny, but the book is not a philosophy but a leaflet.
March 30, 2019
Wasn't a fan of the tone of this book and the sweeping statements it made about applying f**k it to your life. Enjoyed reading the prison analogies and agreed with the premise of the book, but it wasn't personally helpful for me.
January 23, 2016
I loved this book. Thankfully I have been living my life like this lately but reading about other ways to do it and how to encompass the theory in all aspects of my life was good to read.
March 20, 2017
God, I hate self help books. Especially when they are as smug as this one.
April 12, 2017
"Dorința e ca un sac fără fund, pentru că odată împlinită o aspirație, ea nu potolește principala nevoie, care este, de regulă, aceea de a ne simți bine."
January 27, 2022
I try to re-read this book every couple of years to remind myself of the impact it had on me the first time I read it. Makes you think about things differently and worry about things less.
April 4, 2023
Yeah, good, good, good.
Remember that the sh*t is good too. Remember also that forgetting that the s^it is good is good. Now forget all of that and just be irie. Nuff said.
Read it.
Remember that the sh*t is good too. Remember also that forgetting that the s^it is good is good. Now forget all of that and just be irie. Nuff said.
Read it.
April 26, 2022
I've been trying to read this for years. Every time start again, it can't keep my attention, my mind wanders, and I don't get anything out of it.
It seemed to be pretty basic stuff, "don't sweat the small stuff and everything is small stuff" kind of advice.
But then--THEN they started talking about MAGIC STANDING. I kid you not. He starts talking about this special standing exercise. I think--this is a joke, right? I'm getting tired of listening to him explain in minute detail how to exactly hold your body in the magic standing stance. My body is getting tired of just thinking about standing in the magic standing stance. I then realize he is serious as a heart attack. Magic standing is the best thing ever that you can do in your life. With magic standing, you can heal the sick and walk through walls. Yes, he said it--WALK THROUGH WALLS.
This is too much for me. Come on, man.
This is a did not finish, for sure. My two stars is generous, because the first part of the book could actually be of some use in helping people. Even with that, I'm sorry I wasted my $15 Audible credit on this nonsense.
It seemed to be pretty basic stuff, "don't sweat the small stuff and everything is small stuff" kind of advice.
But then--THEN they started talking about MAGIC STANDING. I kid you not. He starts talking about this special standing exercise. I think--this is a joke, right? I'm getting tired of listening to him explain in minute detail how to exactly hold your body in the magic standing stance. My body is getting tired of just thinking about standing in the magic standing stance. I then realize he is serious as a heart attack. Magic standing is the best thing ever that you can do in your life. With magic standing, you can heal the sick and walk through walls. Yes, he said it--WALK THROUGH WALLS.
This is too much for me. Come on, man.
This is a did not finish, for sure. My two stars is generous, because the first part of the book could actually be of some use in helping people. Even with that, I'm sorry I wasted my $15 Audible credit on this nonsense.
October 7, 2020
This book is therapy with attitude.
Parkin begins with personal prisons or emotional blocks. He uses the metaphor of bricks and mortar prisons creating a humorous, relaxed environment to look at ourselves. There are many to get through but if you identify your own prisons you can skip straight to your help area. Parkin then discusses how to break through these walls and some tools we can use. There are useful sections on relaxation and breathing techniques and a chapter on disregarding what others think of you.
I liked the humour of this book. Some self help books are very serious and ‘medical’. Yawn! Parkin is upbeat and funny which goes along with the theme of not taking life too seriously. His wife Gaia contributes some useful sections. They work together running a retreat in Italy.
I identified with quite a few of the prisons so I read all the chapters. I am a completist. That’s one of my prisons. I am compelled to read every chapter because .... well just because!
I bought this book for 50p from a charity shop. As soon as my husband and I saw it we knew I needed to read it and I am glad I did. Even if I had bought it brand new I still believe it’s worth the money.
I recommend this book if emotional walls prevent you from living your life to the full. I actually recommend this book to everyone because some of us are not aware of our obstacles. My prison is fear of the unknown or uncertainty but many others are covered. Try It!
Parkin begins with personal prisons or emotional blocks. He uses the metaphor of bricks and mortar prisons creating a humorous, relaxed environment to look at ourselves. There are many to get through but if you identify your own prisons you can skip straight to your help area. Parkin then discusses how to break through these walls and some tools we can use. There are useful sections on relaxation and breathing techniques and a chapter on disregarding what others think of you.
I liked the humour of this book. Some self help books are very serious and ‘medical’. Yawn! Parkin is upbeat and funny which goes along with the theme of not taking life too seriously. His wife Gaia contributes some useful sections. They work together running a retreat in Italy.
I identified with quite a few of the prisons so I read all the chapters. I am a completist. That’s one of my prisons. I am compelled to read every chapter because .... well just because!
I bought this book for 50p from a charity shop. As soon as my husband and I saw it we knew I needed to read it and I am glad I did. Even if I had bought it brand new I still believe it’s worth the money.
I recommend this book if emotional walls prevent you from living your life to the full. I actually recommend this book to everyone because some of us are not aware of our obstacles. My prison is fear of the unknown or uncertainty but many others are covered. Try It!
January 10, 2024
With the help of his wife, he covered a lot of material here; almost too much. He was wrapping it up when he must have just said, “F**k it..I’ll throw in a chapter about money and relationships and a few other things that’s on my mind.”
I enjoyed his ramblings, which were plenty, along with his sense of humor that comes across like that of an eighth grade boy.
I plan on revisiting his meditation and Quigong techniques sometime, but “f—- it” maybe I won’t. This was a quick and easy read, but would have been quicker if I skipped ahead to page 85 or whatever as he suggested several times while describing different life “prisons” early on.
I enjoyed his ramblings, which were plenty, along with his sense of humor that comes across like that of an eighth grade boy.
I plan on revisiting his meditation and Quigong techniques sometime, but “f—- it” maybe I won’t. This was a quick and easy read, but would have been quicker if I skipped ahead to page 85 or whatever as he suggested several times while describing different life “prisons” early on.
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