My first impression of this book was that the author is off-putting with his preachy and self-righteous tone. I did not care for his writing style. But as I tried to see past that, I realized that his ideas are sound and worth considering. What I appreciated most was his thesis that we are basically marketing the Christian lifestyle to our children. We need to show them how appealing it is, so that they can see the benefits and excitement in a life of service and godliness.
Here are a few of my favorite ideas from this book:
Tend your marriage so it becomes an example of what young people can look forward to. Offer your marriage as an example of the reward that young people are striving toward.
Create an enviable life, a life of purpose and passion.
Teenagers are attracted to attractive people. They want passion and romance. Girls want security with their passion. Boys want challenge and adventure with their passion.
Ask them to write down 5 things that mom and dad could do to make the home life better.
Ask them what do you like most / least about our home? What would you change if you could?
Work with young people. Keep them on the edge of experience, always learning something new.
Seek to be the most thrilling source of entertainment for your kids. Be with them in their play, making it more exciting.
If a boy is engaged in hard work and hard play, he will expend much of his testosterone in that way.
Set up a volleyball net. It’s a wholesome way for boys and girls to interact, a sport that both sexes can play.
Give them plenty of opportunity so socialize with the opposite sex in wholesome ways. This gives them something to look forward to and keep themselves pure for. The ideal of a girl worth having is motivating to a boy.
Give kids all the responsibility they can handle and then step back and let them try.
Trust is a powerful incentive. Create an atmosphere that allows a child who makes a mistake to admit it and take responsibility without recrimination. He can then use his energies to make improvements instead of falling into the self-defeating trap of excuse-making. Provide a setting in which they can start fresh.
Let the older child take responsibility for the younger child, even disciplining as needed when parents are away. Responsibility will bring out the better nature.
Feed their creativity. Experiment with different things until something sticks. It is better to be interested in something frivolous than in nothing at all.
Your kids must be growing or they will go somewhere else where there is growth and challenge.
Enthusiasm for a project feels good and they will want to be a part of it.
The home is a construction site and any construction site generates a lot of noise, dust, clutter, and garbage. Expect a home where children are growing up well to be full of noise and messes. It is the cost of progress.
No one ever climbed out from under a pile of disapproval to win the favor of his or her accuser.