review of
John Darnton's The Experiment
by tENTATIVELY, a cONVENIENCE - May 20, 2024
I was in a rural area visiting used bkstores. It's fairly typical in such places to find many of the bks being "New York Times Bestsellers". I usually avoid such bks, expecting them to be not very good, but I bought this one & another by the same author b/c I wanted to support the bkstore & b/c this seemed to be a critique of the mad scientism of the medical industry.
I'm not sure how many 'thrillers' I've read. A security guard at the Andy Warhol Museum, where I worked, gave me a Dean Koontz, wch I read. A psychologist that I was friends w/ in Brazil told me she liked Harlan Cobin so I read something by him. They were both solidly what I think of as 'best-selling thrillers' & they were similarly formulaic. For all I know, Koontz, Cobin, & Darnton are all the same person or the same team of writers or the same AI or whatever. Still, I enjoyed it, it did its 'job', I was led by the nose, I 'cared' about imaginary people & their imaginary travails.
The scene is set:
"It was dusk, at least, which meant they would be hard to spot in the shadows of the old manor—but not that hard if someone walked around back.
"Skyler felt the fear as a tingling in his groin; from there it spread upward to his belly and reached his arms and legs.
"This is crazy, he thought.
"If they were caught—he couldn't even imagine the punishment. Nothing like this had ever happened at the Lab.
"They weren't sure what they were going to do. They had no plan, really, other than to break into the Records Room and search for clues to explain what had happened to Patrick." - p 1
So they break into the Lab, Skylar finally takes a piss in a convenient retort & after what seems like eons they find..
"Male genitals slumped to one side, swollen with fluid. Skyler tries to avoid looking at the chest, but found his eyes drawn inexorably to it. The chest was gone. In its place was a cavity, sliced open, neat as a gutted fish. Flaps of squared-off skin hung down on either side like shutters on a window, and the rib cage had collapsed inward around a dark hole that was ringed in dark red—dried blood.
"It was Patrick." - p 4
Skyler felt horribly guilty - but how was he supposed to know that Patrick was going to mistakenly inject Skyler's urine in his genitals? It wasn't Skyler's fault.
Oh.. oh.. where was I? Now you know I'm just fuckin' w/ you, having a little fun derailing ye olde formula train - but, really, I don't mean any disrespect, I cdn't write a novel like this - or haven't yet, at least.
"Outside the lecture hall, Raisin pulled Skylar aside.
""It's phony, you know—this whole thing."
""What is?"
""Writing papers, getting grades. They don't even read them."
""How do you know?"
""I tested them. After the first two paragraphs I made it up. I wrote complete gibberish."
"He showed his paper and the grade he had gotten, scrawled at the end: VERY GOOD." - pp 8-9
We skip from Skylar & friends at the Lab to Jude, the reporter in the city:
"Jude passed an honor box in the lobby—Tibbet was too cheap to give the paper away even to the people who produced it—and recoiled at the hype of the page-one headline: KILLER FLU STALKS CITY. Apparently, two people were in the hospital." - p 26
Yes, welcome to the 'real' world. Okay. How cd I NOT like this bk? Darnton has already targetted fake academia & the business-as-usual fake media - & the medical industry is going to get it too.
"The desk officer showing him typical respect, as he read a People magazine without lifting his eye from the page. Jude knew the article, and the author of the article, and he toyed briefly with the idea of informing the officer that about forty percent of it was true. Instead, he placed one hand on the desk, within the range of the man's peripheral vision. The cop acknowledged his presence with a grunt and finally looked up." - p 40
Jude goes to an autopsy.
"McNichol handed Jude a blue jar of Vaseline and told him to dab some on his nose. "Trick of the trade," he explained. "Overwhelms the olfactory sense. I don't require it. I lost my smell of death many years ago."" - p 43
Will I ever get a chance to use that trick? Probably not. I'm reminded, tho, of something I discovered on my own: You know how yr eyes tear when you're chopping onions? If you put a wet paper towel on yr forehead yr eyes won't water. I imagine that the fumes from the onion get absorbed above yr eyes in the wet towel & leave yr eyes alone.
So far, you don't know what's going on from my review & that's deliberate, right? Well, here's a clue:
""Check the sheet," McNichol told Jude. "How old did I say this guy was?"
""Twenty-two to twenty-six years."
"The examiner looked momentarily confused—the first time his self-assurance had slipped a notch.
""Too young. I can tell by looking at these organs—that's way too young. How could I have been so wrong?"" - p 48
Jude's researches take him to an interview w/ a scientist who's studying twins:
""Do you know why scientists are so passionate about identical twins? Every year we trek to their gathering in Twinsburg, Ohio, and set up booths and hound them unmercifully to get them to participate in all kinds of studies." - p 64
& there actually IS a Twins Days Festival in Twinsburg & 2 friends of mine who aren't twins used to go to it every yr. I'm tempted to do the same - maybe wearing a t-shirt I have that says something like "No, we're not twins" or another one that has an arrow on it pointed sideways that says "I'm with stupid".
& here's another clue that might not even seem like a clue:
""Years ago, many years ago, I was sick and I lost a kidney."
""A kidney—how?"
""I was given an antibiotic that didn't agree with me. Gentamycin, it's called—it's fairly common. You get it for a urinary infection, which is what I had. Anyway, in some very few cases, it causes nephrotoxicity. It wipes out the kidneys. So I got a new one."" - p 109
Does that "in some very few cases, it causes" seem familiar? It shd, it's been bandied about quite a bit during the absolutely-safe-except-for-some-thousands-of-instances-where-it's-not era of making excuses for serious illnesses & deaths caused by covid-19 vaccines. It's called iatrogenesis, harm caused by medicine & drs, & there's far more of it than is EVER admitted to by the medical industry. All those 'rare' immune deficiencies may seem 'rare' on a case-by-case basis but when one generalizes all the immune deficiencies together they become much more common.
The novel's copyrighted 1999, the place is mostly NYC. Let's check out what's 'cheap' rent at the time:
"Jude got up early, fixed himself a cup of strong coffee and checked the want ads for a cheap room. He found three or four and circled the ads, including one around Astor Place that sounded right. It read: 1 bdroom, partly furnished, short term, no pets/smokers, $800/mo." - p 160
Sad but true, $800 a mnth at that time in NYC wd've been 'cheap' - but still unaffordable to the likes of me.
""your chance of dying starts to decelerate around the age of 80."
""you mean accelerate."
""no, just the opposite. if you make it to 80, the odds improve ever so slightly that you'll make it to 81. the human mortality rate levels off sharply at 110. So if you make it that far you might just be like madame calment—you'll coast along until 122."" - pp 182-183
This is one of those novels where it seems obvious that the author did research to enable making things realistic. As such, I imagine the above was established upon what was current aging research of the time. I'm thinking of just getting my brain surgically transferred into a young sea turtle. Think that'll work? I always have liked swimming.
It's rare for these 'best-seller' thrillers to deviate from very straight-forward boring college-educated writing. Darnton stays close to the norms but he does stray ever-so-slightly from time-to-time:
"One day your double walks in the door and, bingo, your life cuts to another movie. Wouldn't it be wonderful if the whole thing would just go away?—if I were to wake up on this park bench and find that it all was some kind of celluloid fantasy that curled up and caught fire in the afternoon sun." - p 190
Ok, he's not exactly waxing Clark Coolidge here but I'll settle for it.
""So if the cells only had the enzyme, they'd live longer? That's the theory?"
""It's not theory. It is demonstrable fact. Scientists at the University of Texas Southwestern Medical Center have injected the core of the enzyme-producing gene into human cells. Incidentally, they were able to get the gene by studying our little pond protozoan, which happens to produce huge amounts of telomerase. After they injected it, the telomeres regained their youthful length and the cells kept on dividing happily way beyond their life span. The cells have been rejuvenated."" - p 196
The novel, of course, puts all this in context, I'm just giving you teasers.
""As J. Robert Oppenheimer said before making the atom bomb: 'When you see something that is technically sweet, you go ahead and do it."" - p 206
I made a short movie called "Imagine Utopias" that addresses exactly that. The idea is that while it's the imaginative people who think up diabolical ways of torture & destruction it might be the less imaginative people who bring those things into being. Therefore, I encourage creative people to Imagine Utopias instead of the opposite in the hopes that more utopic conditions will be generated.
"Hartman provided a narrative of the photos, explaining step by step how the nucleus was removed from an unfertilized egg and another nucleus put in its place, then given a tiny shock—1.25 kilovolts for 80 microseconds—to complete the merger and kick-start the process of cell division.
""Electric shock to start it off. Ironic, isn't it, when you think of Frankenstein? Maybe Mary Shelley was right, after all."" - p 220
"["]ever since Christiaan Barnard put the heart from a tweny-four-year-old woman who died in a car crash into the chest of fifty-five-year-old Louis Washkansky and gave him an extra eighteen days of life."" - p 224
18 days? I wonder how good those last 18 days were. Barnard showed that he cd do it but I'm not impressed.
""Imagine, for example, the qualitative leap that would occur if we increase human intelligence by a factor of four. We know we only use a paltry part of our brain." - p 230
Around the same time that I was reading the above I had started watching a movie called "Lucy" that was concerned w/ the same possibility. Don't you just love that sort of coincidence?!
""At the risk of sounding pompous, let me state my view," he intoned. "All of nature is a struggle between the species and the individual. The species strives only for procreation of itself, while the individual yearns for immortality for itself. One involves change and mutation, the other immutability and stasis. The conflict is irreconcilable."" - p 231
"DESERT GRASSLANDS WHIPTAIL.
""Some peculiar characteristics," she replied.
""Like what?" he said. What's he do?
""She, actually."
""How can you tell? How do you know which one I'm talking about?"
""That's just it." Her smile had a triumphant edge to it. "They're parthenogenetic. That's the salient characteristic."" - pp 319-320
Parthenogenesis. It's funny how once every 10 yrs or so that biological possibility is mentioned in something I read. Self-replication w/o sex.
"Everything about him galled her: the pens lined up so neatly in his pocket, the way he took notes in a book that he locked inside a drawer, the unctuous tone he used in talking with his superiors when they ate together in the canteen. She half expected him to rub his hands together like Uriah Heap, and once actually caught him doing it." - p 381
In other words, an untertan.
Yes, there was plenty for me to like about this bk.. I just get so tired of these writers who use cookie-cutter English all the time. Still, of the 3 thrillers I've read this was probably my favorite.