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Death and Destruction #1

Courting Death and Destruction

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Once upon a time, the Princess went to the tower to kill the Dragon. She saved him instead.

Will I conquer the Dragon Prince of Destruction and make him my warrior, or will I share the dark fate of his past murdered brides?

To save the world from human blood farms and vampire courts, a halo-wearing Princess must wed the vampire Prince of Destruction and win his heart...

Unless he kills her first.

294 pages, Kindle Edition

Published August 1, 2023

262 people are currently reading
1238 people want to read

About the author

Emily Shore

32 books710 followers
Emily used to be the good little church-going girl who snuck peeks of smutty romance at the bookstore. Now, she proudly writes smut and has forsaken the religious cult of her past. Emily includes a trauma-healing theme loosely based on her own experiences in all her work.

In 2020, Emily found her voice while writing dark fantasy romance. In 2021, she rebranded on Kindle Vella and has been a Vella bestseller for two years. Her writing always features enemies to lovers with heroines who don't need a sword to be strong, monsters and villains with "burn the world for her" vibes, and trauma healing.

Emily's bestselling books on Kindle Vella include: The Sacrifice, Bride of Lucifer, Bride of the Corpse King, Courting Death and Destruction, and Grymm Beauty. Learn more at “Emily’s Vella Verse” on FB or connect with her on social media to learn how you can become a super fan and get super fan treats!

An abuse survivor and trained advocate, Emily has worked as an awareness speaker all over Minnesota. Identifying as bisexual and feminist, she loves to showcase sex and kink positivity and normalized LGBTQIA+ inclusivity.

When not writing enemies to lovers, Emily is addicted to the Enneagram, rewatching Schitts Creek, cuddling with her kitty, and spending time with her online sisterhood where she can exercise her big empath heart. She lives in Saint Paul with her husband and two daughters—one is a budding author.

Please subscribe to Emily’s newsletter at - www.emilybethshore.com - to keep up with her series projects, author promos, and prize contests. Or follow her on Tiktok at @authoremilybshore.

FUN FACTS ABOUT EMILY:
This list gives you a little peek into the crazy brain of this author. If you find yourself relating to any of these, reach out to me on any of my pages and we shall go forth and bond!

1. I am an extrovert with unlimited psychological energy. (I also stockpile Pinterest memes!)
2. HUGE Enneagram fan, so if you want to connect more, prepare to be asked to take the test so I can better understand you and speak your love language . (My tritype is 847 - which makes me Deadpool's female twin!)
3. My favorite authors on the YA side are Laini Taylor and Susan Dennard. My favorite authors on the adult side include: Amelia Hutchins *Queen*, Pam Godwin *Goddess*, and Elayna Gallea.
4. Up until 2020, I used to write strictly YA. I had a major identity transformation, wrote three books in three months (back to back), found my true VOICE, processed my identity, healed from past trauma, and came out as bisexual. Now, I love writing spicy fantasy romance and bridging the gap between the heterosexual and queer audience by offering them badass heroines taking on the dark alphas and literally *everyone* in my books is queer and polyamorous because #whychoose? It's normalized, it's respected, and it's beautiful!
5. My favorite film is The Princess Bride.
6. I am Disney-obsessed, especially Marvel and the Princess movement.
7. I started writing The Aviary over twelve years ago after a visit to Germany and learning about the Red-Light District. These books were evidence of my sexuality screaming to be let out.
8. My favorite Broadway is The Phantom of the Opera followed closely by The Scarlet Pimpernel.
9. Songs to describe me: Unbreakable by Fireflight, Warrior by Demi Lovato, Ready or Not by Brit Nicole and Lecrae, Speechless by Naomi Scott (Aladdin), Show Yourself by Idina Mendel (Frozen 2), This Is Me from The Greatest Showman, and The Sound of Silence.
10. I’m a mom to two little girls. I fight for a better world for them and for myself.

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5 stars
162 (52%)
4 stars
64 (20%)
3 stars
37 (11%)
2 stars
28 (9%)
1 star
18 (5%)
Displaying 1 - 30 of 170 reviews
Profile Image for Kyla Sixkiller.
744 reviews14 followers
Read
July 20, 2023
I had high hopes for this book and I really anticipated reading it. I was very well pulled in with the first scene and it set a very specific scenario for the upcoming story. I really looked forward to the story about a goddess blessed child with gold rimmed eyes and a goal to take down the head vampire ruling his court. However the story ended up taking a different tangent and we barely skimmed the topic in depth from there on out. The story tiptoed and danced around the main plot line and when we did get some light into it it seemed almost *too* convenient for the characters. The story honestly fell flat for me. Along with the main line of having a destiny forged by the gods and a duty to handle, it was also supposed to be a story about empowering yourself and growing as a person and overcoming trauma. And neither of those felt like they really happened. The FMC was so hot and cold it was as if she had two personalities. The way she healed and moved forward was unconventional but not entirely out of line. It wasn't the healthiest way. The character who actually had different personalities was sweet until you learned about what spirits she was housing and how she got those personalities. One of them was hypersexual and she obtained that one at like 13, and she crossed many lines that made some of the scenes uncomfortable. Especially with the MMC, who is her brother. The MMC is also two different mythological creatures and I am not entirely sure how that works, the flow of it was a bit odd. The lore wasn't exactly linear at all and you're left to your own assumptions a lot. Usually I look forward to reading the next book or hoping there will be another instalment but sadly, not this time. This was previously a Kindle Vella story and maybe that's why the story line felt as choppy as it was but, I digress.
Profile Image for Vintagev_reads.
124 reviews7 followers
October 25, 2024
ARC REVIEW: I was really excited to read this based off the synapses, but found it to not be what I thought it’d be like.


First and foremost, while I appreciate the notes in the beginning talking about it being a work of her own trauma of sorts and going into DID, this book absolutely needs a few things added to the detailed trigger warning list! Child death is a big one for a lot of people and nowhere was there any warning about it. It’s one for me and I was floored by it being announced by page 2. But I pushed through hoping that was it after double checking on if child death was in a trigger list, it wasn’t. But it does come up again with Elysia explaining this darkness within her. There scene goes into graphic detail on an infant’s death. I could barely stomach reading it as a mom who’s lost a child. Triggering for sure. This is not the basis for my review though because triggers are individual to each person.

Beyond that, I found the story to be on the slow paced side and I had a hard time feeling connected to the characters. It’s definitely more of a low steam story. It started with good tension, but with the repetition of what felt like the same situation between them, I found myself skimming through those scenes after awhile. Elysia can’t catch a break, with one quick scene here and there of a breather. Which was sad to see her hop from one rough thing into another. The poor girl deserves a break. It was described as having dragons, which I was excited for. I wish there was more of the dragon aspect. It would’ve been exciting to have more context into that. I wasn’t a big fan of mixing modern real life references into the story.

Then there’s the character that has DID. I love the author showed representation of this. She was one of my favorite characters, however, one of her alters is hyper sexualized which is really sad and I felt for her, the parts where she expresses lust for her own brother was really uncomfortable to read though. So I feel that should somehow be in the trigger list as a heads up too.

Overall it’s an ok book that fall flat for me. I understand this book was a work of the author’s own trauma and commend her for writing it, this book just wasn’t for me. There is a cliffhanger and another book to come, but I will likely not continue reading this story in further books sadly.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
97 reviews
November 13, 2023
DNF.

Was an ARC reader and just couldn’t do it. Had to leave the group and waited to review but just couldn’t get past 32%

Spoilers below… maybe more rant then review???



Read the first few chapters 3 times to try and understand what was happening.

Couldn’t get over the idea that she finds the guy hot who killed here father and girlfriend within the first 30%….

Couldn’t get over the idea that she knew her family was under attack and just ran away to take a altering substance and hide with her girlfriend? Doing some… “meditative” ritual? No idea what was actually happening…

Found the prose hard to understand and follow… felt the main character didn’t know what she wanted ti be. Strong warrior girl or meek terrified mouse… she’s shaking in his presence one second and the next sentence she’s this unafraid sassy pants?

Just not my book.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
Profile Image for PleaseGoAwayImReading.
441 reviews26 followers
October 16, 2023
I received an ARC from the author. This is my honest review: I have really come to like Emily Shore’s style of writing, and this book didn’t change that. If anything, it just made me want to read more of her work!

I really, really liked Courting Death and Destruction. I did not read the Bride of Lucifer series before this book, but I was able to follow along with the plot and keep my character identifications straight. (I will, however, make sure that I DO read those BoL books!) This book had a different feel to it. It was melancholy, but funny; heartbreaking, but inspiring, and sexy without throwing instant sex and/or nudity in the reader’s face. There were moments of sensuality, and not even always on purpose. Elysia is an extremely interesting heroine— her heritage and backstory alone would have kept me dedicated to reading. Neoptolemus is also a supremely interesting character. The fact that he’s the MMC of this tale guaranteed I’d be locked into the story. Neo and Elysia together are just … I have no other word but “enthralling.” Their sarcasm and banter are really entertaining, sure. Their sexual attraction is definitely fun to read, though it is a slow, slow burn. But their souls are really what grabbed me; the way they orbit each other, figuratively wearing a mask to protect themselves, but are drawn to each other like magnets nonetheless. What starts as a challenge or game slowly, and almost heartbreakingly, evolves into something else as these two characters spend time in each other’s presence: talking, questioning, confronting the uncomfortable, sharing pieces of themselves, protecting each other and reassuring by touch. The whole situation is a bit messed up— dealing with prophecies, long fostered hate between families/ entities, betrayal, powerful ( and power hungry, at least for The Father) parents — but these two characters and their souls are just explosive together, and in typical Emily Shore fashion, the epilogue had me gasping out loud and immediately CRAVING more. I really need the next book, like, now!

N.B. This or similar wording may appear across multiple review platforms.
Profile Image for Bevany.
672 reviews14 followers
June 20, 2023
Loved this fantasy enemies to lovers' slow burn romance. For fans of the kingdom of the feared series, I highly suggest this book! Emily has a great way of adding beauty and detail to her writing.
Profile Image for Madeline Paige Fornes.
178 reviews4 followers
August 13, 2025
*I have been off of Emily Shore's ARC team, and have not supported her or her works for some time now. This was due to an interaction where I was asked to change my review rating from lower than a 5 star to a 5 star since I enjoyed the book and they wanted as many 5 star reviews as possible. I believe I had rated it at 4 star, which was more than fine in my opinion. I removed myself from the author's team and social media at that point. I have since found out about the authors use of AI, and I do not support authors using AI to write or make their art when it comes to books. This review was written before all of this had come to my attention. Spooky Mess Reads is not affiliated with Emily Shore or her works and has not been since 2024.*

I read an ARC of the full version of this, and y'all let me tell you. PLEEEEASSSEEEE read this Vella. I would read this as a Vella all over again just to pay Emily for letting me read it as an ARC.

Neo makes me weak in the knees. WEAK IN THE KNEES, I TELL YOU. He is a gem.
Elysia is a force to be reckoned with, as a partner, and as an individual. I want to be her friend, and I want to be by her side in her endeavors.

Three of my favorite quotes from this are:
"I'm a little tired of being f*cked by the fickle finger of fate."
"May the feminist force be with you."
"The greatest form of love is the ability to understand."

There are so many little things intertwined in this book, and they are so artfully worked in. I did have a tiny bit of a hard time following the world building. But the relationship building, is done flawlessly. Morally grey? Check. Unique backstories? Check. Chemistry? Check. Friendships and not isolation once in the relationship? Check.

READ THIS AND DO NOT STOP UNTIL THERE IS NOTHING LEFT TO BE DEVOURED.
Profile Image for Lauren.
203 reviews2 followers
June 12, 2023
ARC Review 😊

This is the first book of Emily Shore that I have read. I must admit the first few chapters had me questioning if I would really like Elysia - but as soon as she took a certain not-water slide 🛝 I was HOOKED. I couldn't stop reading! One more chapter turned to 6 AM & four hours of sleep later, I picked it back up. I love seeing the relationship growth between characters. THAT ENDING THOUGH! HOW COULD YOU!! 🥴 I need the next book STAT!
Profile Image for Tenasha Gummybear_smutbookreder.
224 reviews9 followers
June 5, 2023
This story blended beautifully into the way the writer weaved the story I love Neo,Quillion and Nita they all have different stories and personalities that I love if I could go back in time to where I haven’t read this book just so I could re-read it for the first time I would I cannot wait for this to come out so I may buy the physical book now I’ll be waiting for book 2 to come so excited thank you for trusting me to be a ARC reader it was the best experience I’ve had I highly recommend this book 10/10
Profile Image for Jordynn Ann.
397 reviews3 followers
June 5, 2023
✨ ARC Review✨

This book totally captured me! I didn’t want to put it down! I fell in love with Elysia and Neo! The banter back and forth was everything! Warning this book will give you a book hangover!!

💕Thank you for the opportunity to ARC for you💕
6 reviews
October 21, 2023
ARC Review

This is a slow burn, it took a bit for me to really get into the story. I found the MC’s acceptance of what was happening to her a little rushed and hard to understand, to the point of almost being unbelievable, but despite that the story won me over and drew me in. The story and plot is new and interesting, and once I was in I couldn’t stop. This story took me on a wild rollercoaster ride of emotions and I felt everything. Looking forward to the next instalment.
Profile Image for Tiffany Ewald.
312 reviews40 followers
August 29, 2023
Vampires, humans, gods and dragons! This book has it all. Action, suspense, romance, darkness, and intrigue all topped off with a sprinkle of witty banter and comedic relief! Hauntingly beautiful - I could not put this book down! A well written slow-burn with good world-building, developed characters, and a balanced pace that is easy to follow but twisty enough to keep you captivated. I really enjoyed this and need to see where the shadows will lead us in book two!!
Profile Image for Brittany Kincaid .
43 reviews
October 17, 2023
I absolutely loveeee being an ARC reader for Emily Shore. Every single thing I’ve read by this author is beyond amazing and as someone who has read quite a few ARC books it’s suchhh an amazing feeling when you find an author who becomes one of your absolute favorites this way. This book is a slow burn romance in a beautiful fantasy world that Emily has cooked up. You will fall in love and feel each and every emotion throughout this book. Enemies to lovers mixed with the slow burn will have you screaming for them to be together until it happens! Highly recommend 🖤
Profile Image for Samantha Guna.
9 reviews2 followers
October 16, 2023
Reading this as an ARC for Emily. If you want spice this book isn't for you. There is a good amount of sexual tension but no real spice. If you want a great fantasy story i highly recommend reading it. Tins of twists turns and drama. The last few chapters really had me biting my nails. Can't wait for the next one!
Profile Image for Dorothy Marie.
12 reviews
October 12, 2023
Slow burn? ✔️
Enemies to lovers? ✔️

I received this book as an ARC & I’m so glad I did. It was a little slow at first but that’s only because Emily is building the backstory for what’s to come. Once the book gets going, prepare to be hooked! I loved the growth of the main characters & the banter back & forth between them. Can’t wait for the next book to come out!
Profile Image for Casey Malone.
1 review
October 13, 2023
ARC Review:

I absolutely loved this book and could barely put it down, I really enjoyed Elysia and Neo both, their journey was so enthralling and fun to read!

The supporting characters are also so fun and I absolutely loved them!

The twist at the end has me begging for book 2!!
Profile Image for Heather.
99 reviews3 followers
November 2, 2023
ARC review

I received this book for a review.

Arc review.

I enjoyed this book. I couldn't put it down. It moved first but I kept reading it, waiting and hoping it'd pick up. And it did. And once it did, it didn't stop.

The character's growth and journey was worth the read. I felt their emotions. It definitely does deal with mental health very well.

It's a slow burn romance but a quick book nonetheless. It is worth the read in my opinion.
19 reviews
October 15, 2023
To be completely upfront, I was lucky enough to have received this book as an ARC reader from the author.

That being said, I’m very upfront in my reviews, and want to immediately address my reason for 4 stars. From the moment this book began I had a hard time keeping up with the world the author introduced. I’ve read many reviews from others who didn’t have this issue, and have seen others who also had this issue. I docked a star because of that, and the fact things remained a little hard to understand throughout the entire beginning of the book. I had a hard time catching on to what the author was creating, which was frustrating. It’s was just too much for me to take in. I had a hard time following the FMC’s narrative. Should you let this keep you from reading it? NO. Try it. Once you get deeper into the storyline, you’re hooked and the ending leaves you wanting more.

Now, onto more fun topics. Would I recommend this book? Abso-freakin-lutely. It’s not like other books I’ve read, in the best way. The author created main characters that I honestly can’t decide if they’re good or bad. They are deliciously a little bit of both. This book has weaved in multiple trigger warnings, and they’re there for a reason, but the story they create leaves you desperate to know what happens. I’d classify it as a dark romance. So know what you’re reading before you read it. And the MMC…. Y’all. 🥵 The spice level is like 🌶️🌶️.5, but the tension is out of this world. The witty banter between the characters is EVERYTHING. I stan a sarcastic queen 👑

The author has representation throughout the book, especially with mental health struggles and LGBTQIA+ relationships. If you’re against reading about those topics, just skip the book. Don’t let your opinions ruin the whole book for you, because it deserves more recognition than that. But those like me, who are open to reading new things, please give CDnD a try. I’ve never read another book like this one, and can’t wait for the next.
Profile Image for Kristen.
126 reviews1 follower
December 1, 2023
Having read 'The Aviary' by Emily Shore in the past and loving it I was really looking forward to reading this series. The premise where a princess goes to slay a dragon but actually saves him seemed so good, mix in some vampires and it should have been a great book. Maybe my hopes were too high. The characters were well developed and I loved the chemistry between Elysia and Neo, especially their witty fights. However, though it was a slow burn overall, it felt a little rushed and her desire is a bit spicy at times. Elysia was a fun main character very strong willed, not your typical damsel in distress in a dress, even while dealing with her own trauma. Few moments left me confused. I'm not sure about the halo and how she glowed constantly but nothing was ever said by any other vampires, other than the father can't see it. The world developing could have used some more explanation, having so many courts and each one being different was barely touched on. A good read overall, even just for Elysia and Neo's developing relationship.
Profile Image for Caitlyn Posts.
156 reviews3 followers
August 17, 2023
This is my ARC review and my first time reading a story written by Emily Shore. I love the story building. I love the banter, it's so witty and made me giggle. There were a few moments that were hard for me to follow in the beginning, but I kept going and overall I enjoyed reading Elysia's journey.
Profile Image for Candace Manning.
1 review
February 22, 2024
This book was terrible. Immediately you’re thrown into a world with little to no explanation where the main character makes references to pop culture yet it’s also dystopian somehow. Between the constant nicknames confusing everyone to the cringe dialogue between characters the whole thing felt like a bad fanfiction.
Profile Image for Nyari.
46 reviews
December 21, 2023
I don't make it a habit to check stars or reviews before i read a book, but this book makes me wish I had. It could have been a good story, but the author.... argh nvm, I've just run out of energy to keep doing this review. Anyhoo, is there a half star button somewhere?
Profile Image for Skyee Heart.
41 reviews
July 25, 2023
𝘼𝙍𝘾
𝘛𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘤𝘩𝘢𝘳𝘢𝘤𝘵𝘦𝘳-𝘥𝘳𝘪𝘷𝘦𝘯 𝘧𝘢𝘯𝘵𝘢𝘴𝘺-𝘴𝘭𝘰𝘸-𝘣𝘶𝘳𝘯-𝘳𝘰𝘮𝘢𝘯𝘤𝘦 𝘦𝘯𝘦𝘮𝘪𝘦𝘴-𝘵𝘰-𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘴 𝘧𝘰𝘳𝘤𝘦𝘥 𝘱𝘳𝘰𝘹𝘪𝘮𝘪𝘵𝘺 𝘴𝘩𝘢𝘳𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘣𝘦𝘥 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘥𝘢𝘳𝘬 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘮𝘦𝘴 𝘪𝘴 𝘱𝘳𝘦𝘵𝘵𝘺 𝘴𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘴𝘧𝘺𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘰 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘥. 𝘐 𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘭𝘥 𝘣𝘶𝘪𝘭𝘥𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘢 𝘭𝘪𝘵𝘵𝘭𝘦 𝘣𝘢𝘤𝘬𝘴𝘵𝘰𝘳𝘺 𝘢𝘴 𝘸𝘦 𝘱𝘳𝘰𝘨𝘳𝘦𝘴𝘴...𝘪𝘵'𝘴 𝘱𝘳𝘦𝘵𝘵𝘺 𝘩𝘦𝘭𝘱𝘧𝘶𝘭 𝘵𝘰 𝘶𝘯𝘥𝘦𝘳𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘦𝘴𝘱𝘦𝘤𝘪𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘪𝘳 𝘵𝘳𝘢𝘶𝘮𝘢 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘳𝘰𝘭𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘺 𝘱𝘭𝘢𝘺𝘦𝘥. 𝘛𝘩𝘦 𝘴𝘭𝘰𝘸 𝘣𝘶𝘳𝘯 𝘪𝘴 𝘬𝘪𝘭𝘭𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘮𝘦 𝘣𝘶𝘵 𝘐 𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦 𝘪𝘵 𝘢𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘳𝘦𝘭𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯𝘴𝘩𝘪𝘱 𝘥𝘪𝘥𝘯'𝘵 𝘧𝘦𝘦𝘭 𝘳𝘶𝘴𝘩𝘦𝘥 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘐 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘦𝘮𝘱𝘩𝘢𝘴𝘪𝘴 𝘰𝘯 𝘣𝘰𝘶𝘯𝘥𝘢𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘴 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘴𝘦𝘯𝘵 *𝘤𝘩𝘦𝘧'𝘴 𝘬𝘪𝘴𝘴* 𝘐 𝘭𝘢𝘶𝘨𝘩𝘦𝘥 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘤𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘥 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘨𝘰𝘵 𝘮𝘺 𝘩𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘵 𝘣𝘳𝘰𝘬𝘦𝘯 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘨𝘭𝘢𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘺 𝘢𝘭𝘴𝘰 𝘩𝘦𝘢𝘭 𝘪𝘵, 𝘣𝘶𝘵 𝘥𝘦𝘴𝘵𝘳𝘶𝘤𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘭𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵 𝘸𝘰𝘯𝘵 𝘤𝘰𝘮𝘱𝘭𝘦𝘵𝘦 𝘪𝘵 ,𝘢 𝘴𝘮𝘢𝘭𝘭 𝘱𝘶𝘻𝘻𝘭𝘦 𝘱𝘪𝘦𝘤𝘦 𝘳𝘦𝘮𝘢𝘪𝘯 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘐 𝘯𝘦𝘦𝘥 𝘝 𝘵𝘰 𝘧𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘪𝘵 𝘶𝘱💜. 𝘔𝘺 𝘱𝘶𝘳𝘱𝘭𝘦 𝘩𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘵 𝘸𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘰𝘯𝘭𝘺 𝘩𝘦𝘢𝘭 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘩𝘦𝘳 𝘭𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵𝘯𝘪𝘯𝘨💖 𝘊𝘋𝘯𝘋 𝘧𝘦𝘦𝘭𝘴 𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦 𝘊𝘊 𝘹 𝘛𝘈𝘎𝘓 𝘹 𝘛𝘚𝘢𝘞𝘰𝘕 𝘣𝘶𝘵 𝘥𝘪𝘧𝘧𝘦𝘳𝘦𝘯𝘵 𝘺𝘬𝘸𝘪𝘮?

𝘈𝘯𝘨𝘦𝘭𝘴 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘝𝘢𝘮𝘱𝘪𝘳𝘦𝘴 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘣𝘭𝘰𝘰𝘥𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘳𝘴𝘵 𝘪𝘴 𝘩𝘪𝘨𝘩 𝘰𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘭𝘪𝘴𝘵.
𝘈 𝘩𝘶𝘮𝘢𝘯 𝘣𝘭𝘰𝘰𝘥 𝘧𝘢𝘳𝘮 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘳𝘰𝘣𝘪𝘯𝘩𝘰𝘰𝘥 𝘰𝘧 𝘢 𝘱𝘳𝘪𝘯𝘤𝘦𝘴𝘴 𝘴𝘢𝘷𝘦𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘤𝘩𝘪𝘭𝘥𝘳𝘦𝘯 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘵𝘰𝘰𝘬 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘮 𝘪𝘯𝘵𝘰 𝘴𝘢𝘧𝘦𝘵𝘺, 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘶𝘯𝘥𝘦𝘳𝘨𝘳𝘰𝘶𝘯𝘥. 𝘈 𝘳𝘪𝘥𝘦 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘢 𝘋𝘳𝘢𝘨𝘰𝘯 𝘪𝘴 𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘰𝘧 𝘮𝘺 𝘧𝘢𝘷𝘰𝘳𝘪𝘵𝘦 😍 𝘢𝘴 𝘸𝘦𝘭𝘭 𝘢𝘴 𝘮𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘯𝘵 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘝 𝘪𝘯 𝘓𝘺𝘴 𝘚𝘱𝘪𝘳𝘪𝘵'𝘴 𝘓𝘢𝘪𝘳. 𝘓𝘰𝘷𝘦 𝘮𝘦 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦 𝘩𝘦𝘭𝘭𝘤𝘢𝘵, 𝘮𝘺 𝘱𝘦𝘳𝘴𝘰𝘯𝘢𝘭 𝘧𝘢𝘷𝘰𝘳𝘪𝘵𝘦 𝘱𝘦𝘵.


𝘊𝘩4 - 𝙒𝙃𝙔? 😭😭😭😭
𝘞𝘩𝘺 𝘪𝘴 𝘪𝘵 𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘺𝘵𝘪𝘮𝘦 𝘐 𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘳𝘵𝘦𝘥 𝘵𝘰 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘤𝘦𝘳𝘵𝘢𝘪𝘯 𝘤𝘩𝘢𝘳𝘢𝘤𝘵𝘦𝘳 𝘣𝘦𝘤𝘢𝘶𝘴𝘦 𝘰𝘧 𝘩𝘰𝘸 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘺 𝘢𝘳𝘦 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘩𝘰𝘸 𝘮𝘶𝘤𝘩 𝘧𝘮𝘤 𝘥𝘦𝘴𝘤𝘳𝘪𝘣𝘦𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘮, 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘺 𝘢𝘳𝘦 𝘢𝘭𝘸𝘢𝘺𝘴 𝘵𝘢𝘬𝘦𝘯 𝘢𝘸𝘢𝘺? 😭😭😭 𝘸𝘩𝘺?

𝙒𝙝𝙖𝙩 𝙄 𝙡𝙞𝙠𝙚
- 𝘪𝘵 𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘳𝘵𝘦𝘥 𝘰𝘧𝘧 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘢𝘯 𝘢𝘤𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘧𝘳𝘰𝘮 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘦, 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘢𝘶𝘵𝘩𝘰𝘳 𝘬𝘦𝘦𝘱𝘴 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘰𝘯 𝘩𝘰𝘰𝘬𝘦𝘥
- 𝘌𝘭𝘺𝘴𝘪𝘢'𝘴 𝘤𝘩𝘢𝘳𝘢𝘤𝘵𝘦𝘳, 𝘰𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘤𝘰𝘮𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘩𝘦𝘳 𝘧𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘴, 𝘦𝘮𝘣𝘳𝘢𝘤𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘥𝘢𝘳𝘬𝘯𝘦𝘴𝘴 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘩𝘦𝘢𝘭𝘪𝘯𝘨
- 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘪𝘴 𝘢𝘭𝘸𝘢𝘺𝘴 𝘩𝘢𝘱𝘱𝘦𝘯𝘪𝘯𝘨
- 𝘱𝘦𝘳𝘴𝘰𝘯𝘢𝘭 𝘱𝘳𝘪𝘴𝘰𝘯- 𝘴𝘦𝘳𝘪𝘰𝘶𝘴𝘭𝘺, 𝘪𝘯𝘴𝘵𝘦𝘢𝘥 𝘰𝘧 𝘥𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘥𝘪𝘯𝘨, 𝘐 𝘤𝘢𝘯'𝘵 𝘴𝘵𝘰𝘱 𝘴𝘮𝘪𝘭𝘪𝘯𝘨, 𝘱𝘳𝘰𝘣𝘢𝘣𝘭𝘺 𝘢 𝘴𝘪𝘭𝘦𝘯𝘵 𝘭𝘢𝘶𝘨𝘩 𝘤𝘢𝘶𝘴𝘦 𝘌𝘭𝘺𝘴𝘪𝘢'𝘴 𝘴𝘢𝘳𝘤𝘢𝘴𝘮 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘕𝘦𝘰'𝘴 𝘱𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘦𝘯𝘤𝘦 𝘪𝘴 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘐 𝘥𝘪𝘥𝘯'𝘵 𝘬𝘯𝘰𝘸 𝘐'𝘥 𝘦𝘯𝘫𝘰𝘺 😊
-𝘦𝘮𝘱𝘩𝘢𝘴𝘪𝘴 𝘰𝘯 𝘉𝘰𝘶𝘯𝘥𝘢𝘳𝘺 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘊𝘰𝘯𝘴𝘦𝘯𝘵 ----𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘐 𝘮𝘢𝘺 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘦𝘯𝘫𝘰𝘺𝘦𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘦𝘯𝘥𝘭𝘦𝘴𝘴 𝘵𝘦𝘴𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘰𝘧 𝘣𝘰𝘶𝘯𝘥𝘢𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘴 🙈
- 𝘕𝘪𝘵𝘢𝘢𝘢𝘢𝘢𝘢𝘢! 𝘓𝘰𝘷𝘦 𝘩𝘦𝘳 𝘴𝘮 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘺𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘪𝘯𝘴𝘪𝘥𝘦 𝘩𝘦𝘳
-𝘝! 𝘚𝘩𝘦 𝘴𝘵𝘰𝘭𝘦 𝘢 𝘱𝘰𝘳𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯 𝘰𝘧 𝘮𝘺 𝘩𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘵

𝙃𝙞𝙜𝙝𝙡𝙞𝙜𝙝𝙩 𝙨𝙘𝙚𝙣𝙚𝙨 𝙣𝙚𝙚𝙙𝙨 𝙖 𝙨𝙝𝙤𝙪𝙩𝙤𝙪𝙩
-𝘛𝘩𝘦 𝘷𝘰𝘸 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘤𝘭𝘢𝘪𝘮
-𝘢𝘭𝘭 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘌𝘻𝘦𝘳
- 𝘳𝘪𝘥𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘢 𝘥𝘳𝘢𝘨𝘰𝘯
-𝘩𝘦𝘢𝘭𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘴𝘤𝘦𝘯𝘦

𝘔𝘺 𝘰𝘯𝘭𝘺 𝘤𝘰𝘮𝘱𝘭𝘢𝘪𝘯 𝘪𝘴 𝘌𝘮𝘪𝘭𝘺 𝘪𝘴 𝘢 𝘤𝘭𝘪𝘧𝘧𝘩𝘢𝘯𝘨𝘦𝘳 𝘲𝘶𝘦𝘦𝘯 𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘴𝘦𝘭𝘧 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘦𝘱𝘪𝘭𝘰𝘨𝘶𝘦 𝘧𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘬𝘪𝘯 𝘬𝘪𝘭𝘭𝘴 𝘮𝘦, 𝘣𝘶𝘵 𝘐 𝘴𝘵𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦 𝘩𝘦𝘳 🙈🙈🙈
𝘐 𝘮𝘢𝘥𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘣𝘪𝘨𝘨𝘦𝘴𝘵 𝘮𝘪𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘬𝘦 𝘣𝘺 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘥𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘱𝘳𝘰𝘭𝘰𝘨𝘶𝘦 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘫𝘶𝘮𝘱 𝘵𝘰 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘦𝘱𝘪𝘭𝘰𝘨𝘶𝘦 𝘣𝘦𝘧𝘰𝘳𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘵𝘦𝘯𝘵, 𝘐 𝘬𝘯𝘰𝘸 𝘐 𝘬𝘯𝘰𝘸, 𝘣𝘶𝘵 𝘐 𝘸𝘢𝘴 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘥𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘊𝘊 𝘰𝘬𝘢𝘺? 𝘈𝘯𝘥 𝘐 𝘤𝘢𝘯'𝘵 𝘨𝘦𝘵 𝘰𝘷𝘦𝘳 𝘣𝘺 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘥𝘦𝘢𝘵𝘩 𝘰𝘧 𝘢 𝘤𝘦𝘳𝘵𝘢𝘪𝘯 𝘤𝘩𝘢𝘳𝘢𝘤𝘵𝘦𝘳 𝘴𝘰 𝘐 𝘵𝘰𝘰𝘬 𝘢 𝘱𝘢𝘶𝘴𝘦 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘭𝘰𝘰𝘬 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘢 𝘩𝘢𝘱𝘱𝘺 𝘦𝘯𝘥𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘸𝘢𝘴 𝘩𝘰𝘱𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘰 𝘨𝘦𝘵 𝘪𝘵 𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘦, 𝘣𝘶𝘵 𝘏𝘚 𝘞𝘛𝘏?😭😭😭🤣🤣🤣🤣😭🤣😭

𝘈𝘭𝘴𝘰, 𝘪𝘧 𝘺𝘰𝘶'𝘳𝘦 𝘭𝘰𝘰𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘴𝘮𝘶𝘵, 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘪𝘴𝘯'𝘵 𝘪𝘵. 𝘛𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘦'𝘴 𝘴𝘱𝘪𝘤𝘦, 𝘴𝘶𝘳𝘦 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘴𝘦𝘹𝘶𝘢𝘭 𝘵𝘦𝘯𝘴𝘪𝘰𝘯 𝘪𝘴 𝘱𝘳𝘦𝘴𝘦𝘯𝘵 𝘣𝘶𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵'𝘴 𝘧𝘢𝘳 𝘢𝘴 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘤𝘢𝘯 𝘨𝘦𝘵 𝘦𝘹𝘤𝘦𝘱𝘵 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝙩𝙝𝙖𝙩 𝘯𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵 😉

𝘈𝘯𝘥 𝘱𝘭𝘦𝘢𝘴𝘦 𝘥𝘰𝘯'𝘵 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘯𝘰𝘵𝘦𝘴 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘵𝘳𝘪𝘨𝘨𝘦𝘳 𝘸𝘢𝘳𝘯𝘪𝘯𝘨𝘴 . 𝘐'𝘮 𝘦𝘹𝘤𝘪𝘵𝘦𝘥 𝘵𝘰 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘥 𝘣𝘰𝘰𝘬 2 𝘣𝘶𝘵 𝘭𝘦𝘮𝘮𝘦 𝘪𝘯𝘴𝘦𝘳𝘵 𝘉𝘳𝘪𝘥𝘦 𝘰𝘧 𝘓𝘶𝘤𝘪𝘧𝘦𝘳 𝘧𝘪𝘳𝘴𝘵 🙈
Profile Image for Elizabeth.
441 reviews20 followers
October 14, 2023
***ARC REVIEW***
Name: Courting Death and Destruction
Author: Emily Shore
Rate: 4/5🌟
Spice: 2/5🌶️
Genre: Fantasy Romance

“Once you go dragon, you never go back.”

~ This is my first time ever reading a book written by Emily Shore! Yet I do own one of her books since they were free on Kindle day!!! Now Courting Death and Destruction caught my eye when I saw that it had some Beauty and The Beast vibes! Before even jumping into this book I read the prologue and did mention that even though I didn’t read Bride of Lucifer I can still go ahead and read it! This is a fantasy romance, with forced proximity and forced marriage from the MC in order to get revenge. So once I started to read the story I did lose a little interest in continuing reading the story, but as a reviewer I did not give up on finishing the book. I kept reading it and let me tell you that the storyline started to get really interesting… The plot itself, the suspense, the romance and the darkness is good. I rate this story 4/5⭐️. I just felt the FMC could have been a bit more stronger when it came to using the Halo. I felt like even though she was the chosen one, she had no proper training on what to do, or how to even use the Halo without even fainting. Elysia FMC is sassy, independent, Halo Princess for sure but just lacks a bit of control on her power. Can’t blame her though, it’s not like her mother trained her on how to use it knowing she was the chosen one IDK! Now Neo MMC… Vampire/Dragon destruction prince… Holy Fck!!! Now he’s something… He might bring destruction or be a cocky A-hole sometimes but dang he eventually becomes a softy for Elysia… Their chemistry throughout… The story sure gets very interesting since it is going to be a slow burn romance for sure between them!!!!!! Can’t wait to see what book 2 will bring because that cliffhanger of an ending will leave you with so many unanswered questions…


Profile Image for Stephanie Rhamstine.
160 reviews1 follower
October 15, 2023
I recieved an ARC from the Author.
In Emily Shore’s newest masterpiece, 'Courting Death and Destruction,' readers are plunged into a dark, enthralling world where vengeance and fate are intimately intertwined. The protagonist, a fierce yet vulnerable warrior, is on a mission for righteous revenge, but her journey unveils complexities that blur the lines between good and evil.

Shore intricately weaves a narrative full of intense emotion, heart-pounding action, and sinister intrigue. The protagonist’s battle against Neoptolemus, the enigmatic Prince of Destruction, is as internal as it is external. The dance of desire and hatred, attraction and revulsion, paints a vivid tableau of conflict, illuminating the depths of both characters with every confrontation.

The novel skillfully navigates the terrain of power and submission, offering readers a tumultuous landscape of betrayal, passion, and supernatural might. The enigma of the magical Halo adds a mystic touch, propelling the narrative into the realms of fantasy where every action, every choice, is laced with cosmic significance.

In the treacherous corridors of power where the father of all vampires lurks, the protagonist’s journey of vengeance morphs into a saga of self-discovery. Every page is a revelation, unraveling the mysteries of power, love, and destiny. Can love transcend the sinister shadows of the past? Can power be wielded for redemption? Shore's narrative prowess addresses these timeless questions with evocative prose and intense emotion.

'Courting Death and Destruction' is not just a tale of revenge and romance; it’s a saga of a woman’s indomitable spirit against the ominous specters of destruction. With every chapter, readers will be gripped by an escalating tension, marching inexorably towards a climax that promises to be as unforgettable as it is unpredictable. A spellbinding mix of fantasy, romance, and intrigue - a must read!
Profile Image for Mandy Sickle.
1,479 reviews152 followers
October 20, 2023
I received Courting Death and Destruction from the author in return for an honest review. 

Elysia has a destiny that has haunted her knowing eventually her time is coming. Her mission is to slay the dragon but the more time she spends with Neo she learns he's not the monster that she expected and finds herself falling for her husband. However, time is running out and they can't hide who she is forever. 

I love Elysia she's a fantastic character you can't help cheering her on as she risks no only her life but heart as well. I love that when she takes on the powers she asks about her wings, she's a girl of my own heart. I think Neo just perfect he's my favorite type of love interest the morally grey just works so well with Elysia's light. The longer they are together the stronger the connection grows it's steamy and sizzling. 

I ended up devouring Courting Death and Destruction in two quick reading sessions I couldn't put it down I had to know how it would all play out with Elysia and Neo. This was a wild ride the characters are easy to connect with I just love Elysia she's such a great character in this crazy world she lives in. I did have a few moments where I wanted to throw my book across the room like the last page as now we have to wait for the next one. 

This is my first book by the author and I think I read the first installment on Vella but I'm not sure why I never finished it because I loved every moment of Elysia's story. The author has done a beautiful job creating a story that captures the heart as well as the imagination. I loved the concept for the Halo it was very unique and I can't wait to see her abilities grow. I eagerly waiting for the next installment in the meantime I'm going to check out her other books since this is a crossover. Highly recommend if you like a romantasy with magic, vampires and a dragon prince. 
Profile Image for Courtney  Esper.
60 reviews27 followers
November 16, 2023
Fantasy, dragons, angels and demons, enemies to lovers, forced marriage... I mean, literally ALL of my favorite tropes!

"Maybe Destiny is a bitch, but I'm bringing her bigger sister, Karma, right to the Prince's door!"

"I can't face it yet or my own scars, but by the Goddess, I'll court Death tonight."

I loved the entire plot of this story, so much that I couldn't put this book down. This was a 24-hour read for me, darn life getting in the way of my reading. I absolutely LOVED the mental health representation in this book! I couldn't choose one quote, because there's rampant representation, and I'm obsessed with all of them.

"They may be three-year-old scars, but healing the mind takes far longer than the body."

"Anxiety twitches my fingers and prickles the back of my neck. But I banish the trauma memories, shoving them deep into an island in my mind. But my body always remembers."

"In her case, a multitude of wounds, and I can't imagine how many rebirthed souls she carries within her. Perhaps hundreds of souls." ..."Think you me I have a host of demons in my flesh? Well, I carry pieces of them...and many others."

"...if you trigger Briony, I'll have you on your knees so fucking fast, you'll have scars..."

And the sexual representation is amazingly addressed in the best form I've ever heard...

"I'm as purple as they come, Kitty, so you can steal a kiss from me anytime you want."

And the hilarious modern references in a fantasy world had me crying with laughter!

"My blood shake brings all the ticks to the yard!"

Seriously, y'all need to read this incredible book. It's got LGBTQ+ and its mental health positive, in addition to the witty banter and amazing story! Emily outdid herself with this one!

⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️/5
🌶🌶🌶🌶/5
Profile Image for Katlyn Thompson.
22 reviews
July 18, 2023
ARC review

This ended and I immediately wanted to open the second book. The ending will leave you wanting more, but be prepared, not everything is as it seems.

Vampires, power, princesses, and enemies to lovers and more!

It had a slower beginning, but it picked up quickly for the important areas.
There’s not a lot a steam, but there are several areas of people walking around nude.

The FMC isn’t your typical damsel in distress or one who gets trained to kick ass and use powers. She likes to wear the dresses, she doesn’t yield a sword or weapon, she likes the fine dinning, she has a smart mouth and she knows what she’s out to get and she won’t stop until she does. Even if she has to figure things out on her own.

The princess knows what she is, but she would rather spend her life helping others out of the clutches of vampires and monsters. That is, until things start to take a turn and she realizes what her true destiny is. She has to outsmart those around her and become the one thing she didn’t want to be since being born. She learns how to grow, how to use her powers, how to befriend others.

The Prince is no normal Prince. He’s destruction, he’s out for blood, he’s out to destroy what needs to be destroyed and he’s out to fulfill an oath. When he clashes with the princess, things are right where he wants them. But, do they stay that way?

There’s trauma in this book, there’s people with hidden secrets, there’s lies. If you do okay with those, I’d recommend this read!
Profile Image for Hannah Tharp.
21 reviews18 followers
October 1, 2023
I can see why this book is so special to the writer. There's so many emotions and trauma poured into it and if you can relate to it you can really FEEL all of it. I wish it was spicier, but it fits the story well and doesn't at all come off as a clean romance by any means.
The story poses Elysia as a prophesized warrior to take down the vampire Father. But as most fairy tales go, the story is never that simple. She rebels against the role, as the power only seems to allow others to suffer and she herself has suffered so much. So she decides to use the halo, but it doesn't define her. She still fights to do things HER way the entire way, and in the end she wins HER way.
This story is a beautiful and elegant tale of being born a golden child, somewhat literally, and rebelling against fate and destiny to do what's right in your heart and trying to save those you find worthy. In the end, perhaps that's what we are meant to do.
I will not lie. There's a certain element of poetry and tragedy to this story that makes it more than just a simple romance. Some readers are just not going to be able to understand it. But the ones who can and who can truly love the suffering along the journey will hold this story deep in their hearts for the rest of their lives. I consider myself one of them, and I look forward to the rest of the series.
Profile Image for Chaos.
3,592 reviews116 followers
October 10, 2023
"You were mad to come here. And I crave a little madness."

4.5/5

Lord, have mercy 🥵🥵🥵 all I have to say is I desperately need the rest of this story!!! The tension was 🔥🔥🔥

Now, the characters were just as amazing as the storyline. I love Elysia. She is so strong, and I love her sass! I admire her so much with what she does, but also empathize with her pain and trauma. My heart broke being inside her head. I wanted to scream and cry and fight right alongside her! The side characters were just as developed and added so much depth to the story.

Neo. Well, there is nothing much to say about him hot as hell 🔥😆 no pun intended, but damn!!! The sexual tension brewing between him and Elysia could burn the world down. She is everything he needs and vice versa!! This author is speaking my language with Neo 🥵

Now, my only issue with the book was how it was structured. It felt that every chapter was a hard stop, instead of the flow expected for the natural progression of the story. It didn't stop me from enjoying what I was reading. Overall, I can't be happier with getting the chance to even read this!! I'm so excited to see what the author has in store for both Elysia and Neo. My heart is truly and utterly devastated! I need more, but at the same time, I don't want the heartbreak 😭😭
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