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I, Isaac, Take Thee, Rebekah: Moving from Romance to Lasting Love
In the twenty-fourth chapter of Genesis a beautiful young woman offers assistance to a weary traveler and his camels, and out of that simple action, a marriage results--a marriage that offers profound lessons to couples today. Bible scholar and renowned speaker Ravi Zacharias draws five points critical to the long-lasting success of every marriage from the biblical story of the marriage of Isaac and Rebekah. "Real love folds together both the emotions and the will," writes Zacharias. "Without the emotions, marriage is a drudgery; without the will, it is a mockery." Building upon that foundational truth, Zacharias goes on to explain the principles of seeking the counsel of others when finding a mate, cherishing your partner, remaining pure, becoming a man or woman of prayer, and, finally, risking everything in a relationship in order to experience God's ideal for love. Couples everywhere, from those about to be married, to those who have been married for decades, will draw strength and wisdom for the journey of marriage as they learn from Ravi what it means to move from romance to lasting love.
176 pages, Hardcover
First published January 1, 2001
160 people are currently reading
1791 people want to read
About the author
Ravi Zacharias
255 books1,657 followersFrederick Antony Ravi Kumar Zacharias was an Indian-born Canadian-American Christian evangelical minister and Christian apologist who founded Ravi Zacharias International Ministries (RZIM). He was involved in Christian apologetics for a period spanning more than forty years, authoring more than thirty books. He also hosted the radio programs Let My People Think and Just Thinking. Zacharias belonged to the Christian and Missionary Alliance (C&MA), the Keswickian Christian denomination in which he was ordained as a minister. After his death, allegations of sexual harassment against him emerged, were investigated, and found to be true.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 104 reviews
February 7, 2009
Books on love and romance can be found in abundance. Knowing Ravi Zacharias's reputation for presenting biblical truth in a logical setting, I expectantly chose this one. I was not disappointed. I actually read it twice through in three days because I felt I'd missed some important things the first time. This author has the amazing vantage point of writing from the observations and experiences of two cultures with very different romantic traditions. He is able to point out the benefits and misuses of each while comparing them to Scripture. I like his approach of finding biblical truth and presenting it as inarguable, then offering suggestions and testimonies of how it applies in practical situations. He readily acknowledges that God's plan for individuals looks different for each life though the foundation of biblical truth remains the same. You won't find 10 steps to a perfect marriage and happily ever after. What you will find is a biblical perspective on marriage and a lot of help to get there yourself.
December 6, 2017
I had to listen to this book/sermon for school this week and I am recommending it to everybody I know!!! It is AMAZING!!!!! If you don't have time to read the book, you can listen to the sermon on youtube. It is a five part sermon (each part 14 mins). It is defiantly worth the hour and 20 minutes of your life. You will NOT regret it!!!!! It goes through everything about marriage from a biblical point!! I defiantly learned a lot from this sermon!! So now it is your guys time to go and listen and/or read this book/sermon!!!!
(This sermon is for both genders so whether you are a guy or girl you MUST listen to it! :D)
(This sermon is for both genders so whether you are a guy or girl you MUST listen to it! :D)
December 12, 2017
I’ve read quite a few Christian Marriage/Relationship books, but this one really stands out! Ravi uses the biblical account of Isaac and Rebekah in genesis as biblical evidence for his arguments about necessary behaviors, practices, and beliefs in marriage. Although I’m not yet married, I found that many of his points were also applicable for any sort of friendship.
January 17, 2011
I wasn't sure if I want to read a Ravi Zacharias book on relationships, as I've only been familiar with his apologetics works so far. This book, however, has proved he is a godly man who can equally defend the purity and significance of family as he can defend the Christian faith.
July 9, 2012
I feel this book is not only good for couples but singles who desire marriage one day...Ravi is great at pointing to Christ as a foundation for love and all relationships.
March 20, 2018
I began reading this book because I have watched many videos of Ravi Zacharias speaking and read some of his writing and have found him to be a very wise man when it comes to world religions and the Christian faith, so I figured he would bring a lot of wisdom to the table in regards to relationships and marriage. It turns out that he does! At just over 150 pages and seven chapters, this book is an easy read. It could be read in one, long sitting or in sections over the course of a week.
- - - - - - - - - -
The KEY TOPICS he writes on are: The importance of parental counsel; the commitment of the will; kindness to your spouse; purity; careful thought before important decisions; three steps for preparing for marriage: consideration of maturity, pre-marital counseling, and commitment to conflict resolution; three disciplines that lead to character: continual engagement in prayer, scripture, and church; and reasons for romantic fatigue, in particular, the thought that there is someone better out there for you.
- - - - - - - - - -
In his INTRODUCTION to the book, Zacharias begins by making the point that marriage "is hard work." He says that "it demands nurture and care, and like a tender shoot, the better the care, the better the blossom" (xiv).
In CHAPTER ONE, Zacharias states that he is convinced "that marriage is at once the most powerful union and the most misunderstood relationship we can experience" (6) and "[t]hat word, love, is probably one of the most used and abused epithets that mankind has ever pondered" (11). In discussing Adam and Ever, he writes,"The woman met the desire, the need, and the insufficiency of the man in a way that God precluded Himself from and that another man was not intended to meet" (14).
He goes on to conclude the chapter by discussing the importance of godly parental counsel in deciding who to marry, claiming that in the moment "our emotions can take over and prevent our minds from functioning with legitimate objectivity" (19), so "[w]hile not a guarantee, parental counsel and blessing is nevertheless the way of wisdom and must be seriously considered" (21).
In CHAPTER TWO, he discusses the importance of both will and emotion in regards to love. He quotes his brother who said, "Love is as much a question of the will as it is of the emotion. And if you will to love somebody, you can" (29). He goes on to make the statement that "Without the will, marriage is a mockery; without emotion, it is a drudgery. You need both" (30). He emphasizes that the first hard lesson to learn is that we must serve each other even when the charm fades—and it will. He declares that "the reason we have a crisis in our gender relationships is that "we would rather be served than serve" (35).
Zacharias wants to make sure that we are not "deceived by the flutter of the heart" (36) but rather, after thoughtful consideration, that we come to a commitment to "live a life of continual dying to oneself" before we walk down the aisle (36). "No one likes to begin life with a funeral. But in a sense, that is where marriage begins" (39).
In CHAPTER THREE, he writes on the importance of kindness in marriage. He states, "I would go so far as to say that there is never a reason to be unkind" (50). "I do not know what mileage you have been asked to walk with your partner, but I have no doubt there is another mile you will still need to walk when things get tough" (56) and "the commitment of the will and kindness are components that blend into a lovely mix" which will help your relationship flourish in these hard times (61).
In CHAPTER FOUR, Zacharias begins by stating that "parental counsel and the commitment of the will with its flip side of kindness" are essential in deciding who we are going to marry (65), but it is also important to remember one of the most valuable gifts we can give to our spouse: purity. He contends that there are few gifts one can give that are more sacred (66). He states that the best advice he can give to the young man is to train his eyes, for "where the eye is focused, there the imagination finds its raw material. The right focus must be won at immense cost and discipline. Train the eye to see the good, and the imagination will follow suit" (80).
In CHAPTER FIVE, he expounds on the idea that the best decisions are made after careful, protracted thought. He gives three ways to prepare yourself best for marriage. The first is "to ask yourself if you truly have the maturity to sacrifice your selfishness for the responsibility that lies ahead" because "[w]hen you say, 'I do,' you enter a whole new world of fiscal, emotional, and manual responsibility" (97). The second step is "to get the best premarital counseling you can" (100) and to seek, in particular, the wisdom of those older and wiser than you (102). The third is to have a "commitment to conflict resolution" (103). He says that personality matters that could be contentious "will only grow exponentially with time" (105), so they "must be talked over so that the relationship is not put in jeopardy" later on (104). He claims that "talking [issues] over in the light of the other person's personality is the key to conflict resolution" (105).
In CHAPTER SIX, Zacharias discusses three "governing disciplines" that "sow the seeds of character" which should be practiced before marriage and throughout your whole life (124). The first is that "your personal life must be ordered by prayer as a commitment each day." He declares that it "should not be seen as a burden but as a privilege to seek the face of God before you face the day" (124). "Become a man or woman of prayer," he instructs (121). The second is to "study God's Word with a disciplined regularity" (127) because scripture "leads you to the Savior and then becomes a source of instruction to help you grow in character and wisdom" (128). The third step is "active involvement in a local church, especially when a family is young and needs to grow in faith and knowledge" (129-130).
In CHAPTER SEVEN, he begins by talking about how sometimes, even when all the elements are in place for a marriage to thrive, "there is romantic fatigue" (135). Despite the reasons for this being "far too complex to try to sort out" in the book, he goes on to "take a stab at what can go wrong and how to keep it from happening" (137).
The most important, he says, is to "not even flirt with the idea that there may have been somebody better out there or someone else with whom you may connect better" (137). He emphasizes that "infidelities are not always physical" and that "[m]ind games can bring bigger losses than imagined and should be stifled early. Receiving the partner as a gift from God, 'warts and all,' is a commitment with which one begins" (137). He states that "[a]ffairs often begin because one person finds someone else he or she relates to better and with whom he or she experiences more intimacy or warmth, without all the burdens of carrying a family" but "the truth is that the new car will lose its appeal, too," so we should "[f]rom its very inception, kill the thought that there is somebody better out there, with arms wide open, just waiting to bring you perfect happiness" (138). "There is no perfect person out there, and 'better' can be a very misleading term" (139). There are several other issues he discusses after this.
He closes the book with the thought that each day, we must "take a good look at the face before [us] and see, in the light of God's grace, the face of God reflected in that precious face." He urges us to "see the beauty or frailty, as the case may be, as the character given to the individual and the trust given to you" (154). "Marriages that are Christ-centered are beautiful to behold and wonderful to enjoy," he says. "Romance as God intended it can last a lifetime" (156).
- - - - - - - - - -
"I, Isaac, Take Thee, Rebekah" was a wonderful book to read. Zacharias' simple presentation of the important principles for preparing for and thriving in marriage is powerful and challenging. The only reason that I gave it four stars is because I felt he could have organized the book a little more strictly. I would have liked more clearly defined sections that did not blend together as much as his did. The content is invaluable, however, even if it is not organized how I would have done it! Thank you Ravi!
- - - - - - - - - -
The KEY TOPICS he writes on are: The importance of parental counsel; the commitment of the will; kindness to your spouse; purity; careful thought before important decisions; three steps for preparing for marriage: consideration of maturity, pre-marital counseling, and commitment to conflict resolution; three disciplines that lead to character: continual engagement in prayer, scripture, and church; and reasons for romantic fatigue, in particular, the thought that there is someone better out there for you.
- - - - - - - - - -
In his INTRODUCTION to the book, Zacharias begins by making the point that marriage "is hard work." He says that "it demands nurture and care, and like a tender shoot, the better the care, the better the blossom" (xiv).
In CHAPTER ONE, Zacharias states that he is convinced "that marriage is at once the most powerful union and the most misunderstood relationship we can experience" (6) and "[t]hat word, love, is probably one of the most used and abused epithets that mankind has ever pondered" (11). In discussing Adam and Ever, he writes,"The woman met the desire, the need, and the insufficiency of the man in a way that God precluded Himself from and that another man was not intended to meet" (14).
He goes on to conclude the chapter by discussing the importance of godly parental counsel in deciding who to marry, claiming that in the moment "our emotions can take over and prevent our minds from functioning with legitimate objectivity" (19), so "[w]hile not a guarantee, parental counsel and blessing is nevertheless the way of wisdom and must be seriously considered" (21).
In CHAPTER TWO, he discusses the importance of both will and emotion in regards to love. He quotes his brother who said, "Love is as much a question of the will as it is of the emotion. And if you will to love somebody, you can" (29). He goes on to make the statement that "Without the will, marriage is a mockery; without emotion, it is a drudgery. You need both" (30). He emphasizes that the first hard lesson to learn is that we must serve each other even when the charm fades—and it will. He declares that "the reason we have a crisis in our gender relationships is that "we would rather be served than serve" (35).
Zacharias wants to make sure that we are not "deceived by the flutter of the heart" (36) but rather, after thoughtful consideration, that we come to a commitment to "live a life of continual dying to oneself" before we walk down the aisle (36). "No one likes to begin life with a funeral. But in a sense, that is where marriage begins" (39).
In CHAPTER THREE, he writes on the importance of kindness in marriage. He states, "I would go so far as to say that there is never a reason to be unkind" (50). "I do not know what mileage you have been asked to walk with your partner, but I have no doubt there is another mile you will still need to walk when things get tough" (56) and "the commitment of the will and kindness are components that blend into a lovely mix" which will help your relationship flourish in these hard times (61).
In CHAPTER FOUR, Zacharias begins by stating that "parental counsel and the commitment of the will with its flip side of kindness" are essential in deciding who we are going to marry (65), but it is also important to remember one of the most valuable gifts we can give to our spouse: purity. He contends that there are few gifts one can give that are more sacred (66). He states that the best advice he can give to the young man is to train his eyes, for "where the eye is focused, there the imagination finds its raw material. The right focus must be won at immense cost and discipline. Train the eye to see the good, and the imagination will follow suit" (80).
In CHAPTER FIVE, he expounds on the idea that the best decisions are made after careful, protracted thought. He gives three ways to prepare yourself best for marriage. The first is "to ask yourself if you truly have the maturity to sacrifice your selfishness for the responsibility that lies ahead" because "[w]hen you say, 'I do,' you enter a whole new world of fiscal, emotional, and manual responsibility" (97). The second step is "to get the best premarital counseling you can" (100) and to seek, in particular, the wisdom of those older and wiser than you (102). The third is to have a "commitment to conflict resolution" (103). He says that personality matters that could be contentious "will only grow exponentially with time" (105), so they "must be talked over so that the relationship is not put in jeopardy" later on (104). He claims that "talking [issues] over in the light of the other person's personality is the key to conflict resolution" (105).
In CHAPTER SIX, Zacharias discusses three "governing disciplines" that "sow the seeds of character" which should be practiced before marriage and throughout your whole life (124). The first is that "your personal life must be ordered by prayer as a commitment each day." He declares that it "should not be seen as a burden but as a privilege to seek the face of God before you face the day" (124). "Become a man or woman of prayer," he instructs (121). The second is to "study God's Word with a disciplined regularity" (127) because scripture "leads you to the Savior and then becomes a source of instruction to help you grow in character and wisdom" (128). The third step is "active involvement in a local church, especially when a family is young and needs to grow in faith and knowledge" (129-130).
In CHAPTER SEVEN, he begins by talking about how sometimes, even when all the elements are in place for a marriage to thrive, "there is romantic fatigue" (135). Despite the reasons for this being "far too complex to try to sort out" in the book, he goes on to "take a stab at what can go wrong and how to keep it from happening" (137).
The most important, he says, is to "not even flirt with the idea that there may have been somebody better out there or someone else with whom you may connect better" (137). He emphasizes that "infidelities are not always physical" and that "[m]ind games can bring bigger losses than imagined and should be stifled early. Receiving the partner as a gift from God, 'warts and all,' is a commitment with which one begins" (137). He states that "[a]ffairs often begin because one person finds someone else he or she relates to better and with whom he or she experiences more intimacy or warmth, without all the burdens of carrying a family" but "the truth is that the new car will lose its appeal, too," so we should "[f]rom its very inception, kill the thought that there is somebody better out there, with arms wide open, just waiting to bring you perfect happiness" (138). "There is no perfect person out there, and 'better' can be a very misleading term" (139). There are several other issues he discusses after this.
He closes the book with the thought that each day, we must "take a good look at the face before [us] and see, in the light of God's grace, the face of God reflected in that precious face." He urges us to "see the beauty or frailty, as the case may be, as the character given to the individual and the trust given to you" (154). "Marriages that are Christ-centered are beautiful to behold and wonderful to enjoy," he says. "Romance as God intended it can last a lifetime" (156).
- - - - - - - - - -
"I, Isaac, Take Thee, Rebekah" was a wonderful book to read. Zacharias' simple presentation of the important principles for preparing for and thriving in marriage is powerful and challenging. The only reason that I gave it four stars is because I felt he could have organized the book a little more strictly. I would have liked more clearly defined sections that did not blend together as much as his did. The content is invaluable, however, even if it is not organized how I would have done it! Thank you Ravi!
February 14, 2011
Rating: 3.5 stars--I liked it, but it just was not as good as it should have been.
Generally Speaking: While working through Focus on the Family's The Truth Project, I became aquainted with Ravi Zacharias. I found him to be brilliant, intelligent, and insightful. I decided to rediscover the public library and borrow some books on a variety of subjects. I borrowed two by Zacharias and one edited by him. When I picked this one out, I was expecting it to be a commentary on Old Testament culture. When I got it home, I read the subtitle: "Moving from Romance to Lasting Love." Oh. I decided to read it since I had been contemplating reading some books on the subject of love and marriage anyway. So, I eagerly began reading this book...and was pretty much disappointed until I reached the second half.
My beef: I had hoped this book would enlighten me on the subject of how to grow a "romantic relationship" from one of mere attraction to one of lasting love. Except for a few quotable moments, the first three chapters of this book (it has 7) could be summarized into one sentence. "Marriage is more about your resolve to stick together than romantic feelings." I felt that Zacharias was saying it didn't matter who you married, or if you even liked the person, much less loved them. If you were willing to dedicate yourself to making it work, it would work no matter what. Now, this is not necessarily bad advice. If a person goes into marriage with the mindset it will be all sunshine and roses, they are just plain wrong. I'd like to think that my marriage to someone I loved would have a better chance than one with some random guy I just met on the street. But I digress. Zacharias does bring up the point how finding the favor of God your relationship is important. But he repeats the "all that matters is determination" mindset to the point of losing all his other points. Perhaps this focus is because he grew up in an Indian culture where arranged marriages are common (his marriage was not an arranged one, though). The dedication needed to have a successful marriage in that situation is great indeed! I imagine the Western view of lovestruck marriages with cherubs singing and puppies frolicing in meadows looks silly to him. Perhaps he felt we needed his point drilled into our heads. If that was is goal, he achieved it.
The Good Parts: After we got into the later chapters of the book (particularly the last two), it became apparant Zacharias does have a romantic bone in his body! He also dealt more with the actual romance of Rebekah and Isaac, drawing the parallels which I had waited for the whole book. He also included a lovely hymn at the end to reiterate his point about God being the ultimate one to consult in your relationship. Zacharias also talks about the things one should do in his or her life to prepare for marriage and to be ready for marriage and life: a prayer life, an ongoing personal Bible study, and being involved in a local church. But that was an odd thing about this book. For it supposed to be about love and marriage, there was a large focus on how to live a personal Christian life. Perhaps that is the point. We must be fully grounded in our faith both individually and together.
This book was definitely thought provoking. But not about what I thought Zacharias's point was. I had a lot of thoughts about prayer. About Bible study. About outside perspective. Etc. My thoughts inspired by this book regarding entering the state of marriage?
1.) Surrender your life to God.
2.) Surrender your romance to God.
3.) Do not enter a relationship without God's consent.
4.) Make sure your parents are on board (hopefully that is an option)
5.) Keep the romance alive by doing the little things for each other.
6.) But remember, when the going gets tough, dedication is a major part of love.
Otherwise, it is just lust.
Generally Speaking: While working through Focus on the Family's The Truth Project, I became aquainted with Ravi Zacharias. I found him to be brilliant, intelligent, and insightful. I decided to rediscover the public library and borrow some books on a variety of subjects. I borrowed two by Zacharias and one edited by him. When I picked this one out, I was expecting it to be a commentary on Old Testament culture. When I got it home, I read the subtitle: "Moving from Romance to Lasting Love." Oh. I decided to read it since I had been contemplating reading some books on the subject of love and marriage anyway. So, I eagerly began reading this book...and was pretty much disappointed until I reached the second half.
My beef: I had hoped this book would enlighten me on the subject of how to grow a "romantic relationship" from one of mere attraction to one of lasting love. Except for a few quotable moments, the first three chapters of this book (it has 7) could be summarized into one sentence. "Marriage is more about your resolve to stick together than romantic feelings." I felt that Zacharias was saying it didn't matter who you married, or if you even liked the person, much less loved them. If you were willing to dedicate yourself to making it work, it would work no matter what. Now, this is not necessarily bad advice. If a person goes into marriage with the mindset it will be all sunshine and roses, they are just plain wrong. I'd like to think that my marriage to someone I loved would have a better chance than one with some random guy I just met on the street. But I digress. Zacharias does bring up the point how finding the favor of God your relationship is important. But he repeats the "all that matters is determination" mindset to the point of losing all his other points. Perhaps this focus is because he grew up in an Indian culture where arranged marriages are common (his marriage was not an arranged one, though). The dedication needed to have a successful marriage in that situation is great indeed! I imagine the Western view of lovestruck marriages with cherubs singing and puppies frolicing in meadows looks silly to him. Perhaps he felt we needed his point drilled into our heads. If that was is goal, he achieved it.
The Good Parts: After we got into the later chapters of the book (particularly the last two), it became apparant Zacharias does have a romantic bone in his body! He also dealt more with the actual romance of Rebekah and Isaac, drawing the parallels which I had waited for the whole book. He also included a lovely hymn at the end to reiterate his point about God being the ultimate one to consult in your relationship. Zacharias also talks about the things one should do in his or her life to prepare for marriage and to be ready for marriage and life: a prayer life, an ongoing personal Bible study, and being involved in a local church. But that was an odd thing about this book. For it supposed to be about love and marriage, there was a large focus on how to live a personal Christian life. Perhaps that is the point. We must be fully grounded in our faith both individually and together.
This book was definitely thought provoking. But not about what I thought Zacharias's point was. I had a lot of thoughts about prayer. About Bible study. About outside perspective. Etc. My thoughts inspired by this book regarding entering the state of marriage?
1.) Surrender your life to God.
2.) Surrender your romance to God.
3.) Do not enter a relationship without God's consent.
4.) Make sure your parents are on board (hopefully that is an option)
5.) Keep the romance alive by doing the little things for each other.
6.) But remember, when the going gets tough, dedication is a major part of love.
Otherwise, it is just lust.
July 27, 2016
Ravi Zacharias uses Genesis Ch. 24 as the basis for this book on God's eternal design for the family, courtship, marriage, and lasting commitment. And it seems that although the book isn't divided as such but is sectioned into seven chapters, these three themes emerge, and in that order. Rather than dispensing advice as so many marriage manuals do, Dr. Zacharias goes deeper. Rather than providing the usual dismal statistics and the erosion of culture and its effects on marriage, he asks us to look to the biblical example and note that 1) God created us as we are and has a divine design for the family unit on which society is to be built, 2) Both partners must surrender the will (body and soul) to Christ and to one another, which is an unavoidable step if we are to truly serve one another...and it involves risk, 3) the marriage of two people is really the blending of families and sometimes even cultures, and to do this, prayer is essential at every stage, and 4) those understandings and commitments already identified must continue if we are to endure the dry spells interspersed with the joys, and the temptations that fade and pale in comparison with the mate to whom we have vowed. Its a book for those considering courtship, those in the later years of a marriage, and everyone in between.
February 12, 2021
I cannot, in good conscience, have a rating for this book that could be seen as a recommendation by someone. I don't remember much of this book in detail, so I really can't comment on the content. Given that Zacharias has been (posthumously) revealed as a false teacher, and the execrable way in which RZIM has handled the allegations of his sexual abuse, I warn potential readers: you do not want to read a book on relationships by a man who was a sexual predator in his lifetime.
June 26, 2008
It is when you get to read this book, will you completely comprehend that family, marriage is the idea of God, thus, it should be built under God's principles to achieve the harmonize, sacred marriage and joyful family.
Ravi Zacharia explained the concept of marriage so splendidly through the short record of Isaac's quest for Rebekah in the Holy Bible.
Ravi Zacharia explained the concept of marriage so splendidly through the short record of Isaac's quest for Rebekah in the Holy Bible.
December 7, 2012
This is a must-read book for anyone of dating age. I believe kids should read it in their teens, then again when they start dating, again when they're serious, before they get married, and every few years into the marriage. Such good and important information from a Biblical perspective.
January 22, 2011
I read this just before getting married. It helped!
February 6, 2017
One of my favorites. Read this book many times. Good to be reminded. A great read!
October 23, 2021
some gold in here - hard to reconcile what's in here to what happened in his life
June 2, 2020
Wow, what a wonderfully-written book drawing applications to marriage from the story of Isaac and Rebekah’s wedding. I can’t remember if I’ve ever read an entire book by Ravi Zacharias, but I wouldn’t have guessed that the first would be on the topic of marriage! I particularly loved the chapters on the Indispensable Element in Love and the importance of prayer.
“Many pray for the right partner but cease to pray for the right union—that they be one as Jesus and the Father are one and so experience the full measure of His joy in the relationship.” So many wonderful insights in this eloquently written book...I will be sharing this one with others!
“Many pray for the right partner but cease to pray for the right union—that they be one as Jesus and the Father are one and so experience the full measure of His joy in the relationship.” So many wonderful insights in this eloquently written book...I will be sharing this one with others!
July 12, 2020
This book is a must read for anyone thinking they will marry. It should be read when you start to date, start to think about getting engaged and when you start to think this person is the only one for me! I read it after 41 years of marriage and it helped me appreciate my husband even more. These are the Biblical truths we were taught and cherished.
May 22, 2017
Parts of the book are geared more toward men, no doubt because the author is a man and he speaks of what he knows. But other parts apply equally to both men and women. Some parts were more difficult to understand; had to reread a few times. Overall it was good.
January 25, 2018
An exegetical journey of Isaac and Rebekah; a story bathed in prayer.
November 24, 2013
Ravi does what he frequently does, and manages to mix apologetics, theology, personal reflection, and real application, to what is perhaps the most sensitive and difficult area of all, love and commitment.
While I am currently an outsider, I have experienced enough to know that much of what he says is dead on, and I suspect much of those things that I am not quite certain of are as well, not because I have experienced them, but because I have experienced the kinds of troubles and the kinds of joys and the kinds of confusions, and what makes them better or worse, that I think I can at least get a fair idea about what it would be like further down the path.
I think my favorite part of the book is discussing a time during his honeymoon when he got up out of bed at 4am willingly to get his wife a glass of water. He explained that he continued to do this later on, even though he no longer felt the same overwhelming desire to do so, because he knew if he didn't, the desire would go away entirely, as would other, more important desires. It reminded me of CS Lewis's admonishment that sometimes practicing doing the right thing eventually actually became doing the right thing. Different, but similar.
Anyhow, this is a book that could easily have a whole discussion course built around it, and perhaps should. In any event, I don't see how any married person, or any person interested in getting married, could be anything but aided by reading this book. And to top it all off, it's a very quick read.
While I am currently an outsider, I have experienced enough to know that much of what he says is dead on, and I suspect much of those things that I am not quite certain of are as well, not because I have experienced them, but because I have experienced the kinds of troubles and the kinds of joys and the kinds of confusions, and what makes them better or worse, that I think I can at least get a fair idea about what it would be like further down the path.
I think my favorite part of the book is discussing a time during his honeymoon when he got up out of bed at 4am willingly to get his wife a glass of water. He explained that he continued to do this later on, even though he no longer felt the same overwhelming desire to do so, because he knew if he didn't, the desire would go away entirely, as would other, more important desires. It reminded me of CS Lewis's admonishment that sometimes practicing doing the right thing eventually actually became doing the right thing. Different, but similar.
Anyhow, this is a book that could easily have a whole discussion course built around it, and perhaps should. In any event, I don't see how any married person, or any person interested in getting married, could be anything but aided by reading this book. And to top it all off, it's a very quick read.
October 15, 2015
Beware of any culture which deems esteem over embrace. Ravi didn't write this book like other diet books for marriage which finally concludes 3 repeated things. On contrary to those ideologies he speaks about practical stuffs which were entailed alongside the story of Isaac and Rebekah. The gist is,
1) Servitude matters most in love
2) Cherish each other
3) Take hardship in willingness
4) Think your life begins at a funeral
5) Keep comfort in mind while resolving conflicts
The commitment he points appears to be immense unless a couple found the glory of cross in their lives. I bet there is no other book other than bible which defines the intrinsic value of being in love. It got the paramount symbol of love from the master itself. Ravi never fails to address the issue of prayer and devotion which a couple should have. Not just to dwell in gods presence rather to acknowledge his sovereignty over their lives. Whenever a new chapter opens- the life of Isaac and Rebekah unveils the flawless life story, through which Ravi carries his impeccable contexts.
"When willingness embarks, A commitment which is least shaken beckons, A well rooted commitment is well guarded within God's covenant"
-Nithin John
1) Servitude matters most in love
2) Cherish each other
3) Take hardship in willingness
4) Think your life begins at a funeral
5) Keep comfort in mind while resolving conflicts
The commitment he points appears to be immense unless a couple found the glory of cross in their lives. I bet there is no other book other than bible which defines the intrinsic value of being in love. It got the paramount symbol of love from the master itself. Ravi never fails to address the issue of prayer and devotion which a couple should have. Not just to dwell in gods presence rather to acknowledge his sovereignty over their lives. Whenever a new chapter opens- the life of Isaac and Rebekah unveils the flawless life story, through which Ravi carries his impeccable contexts.
"When willingness embarks, A commitment which is least shaken beckons, A well rooted commitment is well guarded within God's covenant"
-Nithin John
July 1, 2011
This is such a great book!!!
Sangat menikimati setiap halaman yang ditulis oleh Ravi Zacharias.
"Pernikahan adalah ide Allah, dan Ia sendiri yang memiliki hak untuk mendefenisikan maknanya". Sungguh buku ini menjadi perenungan yang mendalam bagi saya, sebelum saya tiba di pernikahan saya kelak.
Suara yang berhembus di atas Eden
Hari pernikahan yang mula-mula
Berkat pernikahan yang pertama
Tidak akan berlalu
Hadirlah, Bapa sorgawi,
Untuk memberikan mempelai
Sebagaimana Engkau memberikan Hawa kepada Adam
Dari rusuknya yang terluka
Hadirlah, Juru Selamat yang pemurah,
Untuk menyatukan tangan mereka yang penuh cinta
Sebagaimana Engkau mengikat dua natur
Dalam ikatan kekalMu
Hadirlah, Roh Kudus
Untuk memberkati saat mereka berlutut
Sebagaimana Engkau bagi Kristus adalah mempelai
Pasangan sorgawi yang dimateraikan.
Oh, rentangkan sayap suciMu atas mereka!
Jangan ada kekuatan jahat,
Saat mereka menempuh perjalanan hidup
Di jalan yang suci mereka melangkah,
Melemparkan mahkota mereka di hadapanMu,
Dalam pengorbanan yang sempurna,
Hingga tiba pada rumah kesenangan
Bersama mempelai Kristus sendiri mereka bangkit.
Sangat menikimati setiap halaman yang ditulis oleh Ravi Zacharias.
"Pernikahan adalah ide Allah, dan Ia sendiri yang memiliki hak untuk mendefenisikan maknanya". Sungguh buku ini menjadi perenungan yang mendalam bagi saya, sebelum saya tiba di pernikahan saya kelak.
Suara yang berhembus di atas Eden
Hari pernikahan yang mula-mula
Berkat pernikahan yang pertama
Tidak akan berlalu
Hadirlah, Bapa sorgawi,
Untuk memberikan mempelai
Sebagaimana Engkau memberikan Hawa kepada Adam
Dari rusuknya yang terluka
Hadirlah, Juru Selamat yang pemurah,
Untuk menyatukan tangan mereka yang penuh cinta
Sebagaimana Engkau mengikat dua natur
Dalam ikatan kekalMu
Hadirlah, Roh Kudus
Untuk memberkati saat mereka berlutut
Sebagaimana Engkau bagi Kristus adalah mempelai
Pasangan sorgawi yang dimateraikan.
Oh, rentangkan sayap suciMu atas mereka!
Jangan ada kekuatan jahat,
Saat mereka menempuh perjalanan hidup
Di jalan yang suci mereka melangkah,
Melemparkan mahkota mereka di hadapanMu,
Dalam pengorbanan yang sempurna,
Hingga tiba pada rumah kesenangan
Bersama mempelai Kristus sendiri mereka bangkit.
December 15, 2012
I got curious to see a famed apologist writing about LCM so I picked up this book. The book-owner also told me that Ravi will exegete the Isaac-Rebekah story in it. Well, there was little of the exegesis. There was one I remember; it says, "she became his wife, and he loved her" meaning, the will precedes the 'emotional' component of love. The rest are all principles applicable to all "the three loves", and not strictly to marriage ("the fourth love").
A couple of lessons/quotes Ravi reminded me of in this book:
Both the will and the emotion are required - "Without the will, marriage is a mockery; without emotion, it is a drudgery."
On waiting as a preparation - "Momentous choices are best made when preceded by protracted thought."
On devotion as a discipline - "If you are in the Word regularly, God has a context within which to reach you."
On impulsiveness - "Spiritual convictions with an aggressive will can actually reveal a lack of faith rather than the very faith they seem to demonstrate."
A couple of lessons/quotes Ravi reminded me of in this book:
Both the will and the emotion are required - "Without the will, marriage is a mockery; without emotion, it is a drudgery."
On waiting as a preparation - "Momentous choices are best made when preceded by protracted thought."
On devotion as a discipline - "If you are in the Word regularly, God has a context within which to reach you."
On impulsiveness - "Spiritual convictions with an aggressive will can actually reveal a lack of faith rather than the very faith they seem to demonstrate."
November 27, 2013
This book has really taught me so much in a matter of a few short days. Written more for the single or engaged than it is for long-time couples, Ravi goes into the foundational Christian principles of Christian marriage. Ravi has taught me what it means to deny oneself for your spouse, and really hammered home the concept that love is not just a feeling, but it is dedication and hard work.
Although a lot of the books exhortations scared me, they scared me for the right reasons. What's more, a lot of the things that Ravi talked about were topics that Stephanie and I had previously brought up together and discussed. Hence, the book really just affirmed the importance of these deep and important topics, as it shed new light of the tough issues that are scarcely discussed in today's culture. I have been so blessed by this book, as this is one that I'm definitely going to read through again!
Brent McCulley (11/25/13)
Although a lot of the books exhortations scared me, they scared me for the right reasons. What's more, a lot of the things that Ravi talked about were topics that Stephanie and I had previously brought up together and discussed. Hence, the book really just affirmed the importance of these deep and important topics, as it shed new light of the tough issues that are scarcely discussed in today's culture. I have been so blessed by this book, as this is one that I'm definitely going to read through again!
Brent McCulley (11/25/13)
January 30, 2017
I believe most, though not all, of the thoughts that Ravi has on love, marriage, etc. are accurate. He does frame the entire book in the story of Isaac and Rebekah, which is fine and it works well, though not without some concessions. The largest issue is that for several chapters, he makes large assumptions about the mindsets of our protagonists that are not to be found in the Genesis text. He then proceeds to use that as the basis for his thoughts.
While I don't disagree with a good deal about what he writes, eisegesis is a big no-no and he commits it flagrantly. For someone so learned and highly esteemed, including by me, this is a major detraction for me and this book.
If you can read this as a wise man's personal experience and thoughts, it is still well worth reading. I expect not everyone will be as turned off by his misuse of the Biblical text as I am.
While I don't disagree with a good deal about what he writes, eisegesis is a big no-no and he commits it flagrantly. For someone so learned and highly esteemed, including by me, this is a major detraction for me and this book.
If you can read this as a wise man's personal experience and thoughts, it is still well worth reading. I expect not everyone will be as turned off by his misuse of the Biblical text as I am.
October 27, 2015
I liked this book more at the beginning than at the end. It starts strong, and I enjoyed the focus on one of my favorite Bible stories. But in the end, I felt like there was just too much forced into the story. I like reading books where things are pulled out of the story in order to show God's truths to us and how those truths impact our real lives in practical ways. This felt like the opposite to me--he seemed to be fitting the story around what he wanted to say about courtship and marriage. And while I don't necessarily disagree with much of what he said, I would rather he presented these things as his opinion, or based on his life experiences, rather than forcing them into the story of Isaac and Rebekah.
February 20, 2011
I highly suggest this for anyone who is married, is getting married, or wants to get married someday. Catie and I read it together and talked to each other about each chapter and had a lot of fruitful discussions. Ravi really gets to the heart of what it means to wed by using examples from his own life. This is NOT a self-help book. As Catie and I read through other books together and go through our pre-marital counseling, we find ourselves referring back to something we read in "I, Isaac, Take Thee, Rebekah" time and time again. I really think we came out of it understanding each other even better than we did before.
January 16, 2015
I read pretty much anything Zacharias has put out, because I feel his writing gives me a real solid intellectual foundation for my faith. While this short passage, with several Kindle edition grammatical errors, is probably overpriced for the market I did enjoy it greatly.
Mr. Zacharias's thoughts on love and real commitment make you feel like you're talking to a wise grandfather. It's refreshing to not hear someone so pessimistic about building with a real partner, and to actually have a great deal of logic behind his teachings.
I feel like a better person having read it, and that's really all I was looking for.
Mr. Zacharias's thoughts on love and real commitment make you feel like you're talking to a wise grandfather. It's refreshing to not hear someone so pessimistic about building with a real partner, and to actually have a great deal of logic behind his teachings.
I feel like a better person having read it, and that's really all I was looking for.
August 3, 2015
Ravi Zacharias gives a beautiful commentary on the centrality of marriage. It gave me a renewed commitment to my own marriage. Zacharias gives many examples that you probably wouldn't get from a typical Christian author, because his marriage bridges two different cultures. I was also impressed with his ability to give life to the marriage of Isaac and Rebecca, a story that doesn't often ring true when you are reading straight through the book of Genesis. It invokes a deep sense of reverence for marriage that is often lost in the hype and scare over the fate of marriage in today's political battles and decisions.
Currently reading
July 11, 2008One of the biggest things that has struck me thus far is that Dr. Zacharias brings to light the fact that God designed woman for a very specific purpose, one which He himself did not fulfill. Man already had a relationship with God. If God wanted man to have a companion, He could have created another man. Yet he chose to create woman to "complete man" spiritually and in ways that no other creation could. There is also alot more about purity and the sanctity of marriage and about the spiritual ramifications of not keeping oneself pure before and after marriage.
August 8, 2008
In this book, the author has taken much of his teachings on love, relationships, and marriage and put it all together to form this book. It is roughly framed around the Isaac/Rebekah story. Different parts of the story serve as a launching pad to teach biblical truths about love and relationships. Overall, the book is helpful, especially chapter 2, “The Will to Do.” Zacharias is well-gifted in examining culture and critiquing it in light of Biblical principles. He does the same in this book.
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