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The Secrets About Life Every Woman Should Know: Ten Principles for Total Emotional and Spiritual Fulfillment by Barbara De Angelis
One of the nation's premiere relationship experts turns her attention to the most important relationship we will ever have--the one with ourselves.
Hardcover
First published January 1, 1991
71 people are currently reading
510 people want to read
About the author
Barbara De Angelis
91 books283 followersBarbara De Angelis Ph.D. is one of the most influential teachers of our time in the field of relationships and personal growth. For the past twenty-five years, she has reached tens of millions of people throughout the world with her positive messages about love, happiness and the search for meaning in our lives. As a best-selling author, popular television personality and sought after motivational speaker, Barbara has been a pioneer in the field of personal transformation as one of the first people to popularize the idea of self-help in the 1980's, and as one of the first nationally recognized female motivational teachers on television.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 59 reviews
January 26, 2011
First off, I am a man. Secondly, this book mostly did not apply to me. I thought that if there were secrets every women should know, why shouldn't men know them as well? I mean, as long as they don't apply to feminine products, or other female-only areas, EVERYONE, not just women should know them too, right?
Although most of the advice in the book is good, I couldn't help feeling like it made women crazier than I had given them credit for, and I'm even engaged to a crazy woman now (self-admitted crazy)! Strong independent and self-assured women should avoid this book, because it will be insulting to them. I guess most women are not that, which might be why this book could do well.
A lot of the things just don't apply to me. I am half crazy, but I don't absolutely dread change. Me and my fiancee sleep on different sides of the bed all the time. I am by no means a suave confident man, but never as neurotic as this woman is even on my bad days. I got a lot of laughs out of the cd. For some reason a line had me singing 'Mortal Kombat' for 20 mins in my car, and then I had to go and rewind the CD to hear what I had missed. That's not easy to do, because I think the song is only about 40 seconds long before you have to repeat it. Perhaps, I grew up too serious and unable to relate to the obsessions over things which I place no value on.
Although the book tries to teach women self-confidence, it pushes aside secrets of forming of healthy relationships, which I believe is far more important. The book is introspective, and doesn't venture too far from the womb.
Also, I couldn't help but feel that part of the 3rd cd was teaching women to learn how to self-pleasure themselves.
Cause I believe... Love is the answer.
I believveee... Love will find a way.
Although most of the advice in the book is good, I couldn't help feeling like it made women crazier than I had given them credit for, and I'm even engaged to a crazy woman now (self-admitted crazy)! Strong independent and self-assured women should avoid this book, because it will be insulting to them. I guess most women are not that, which might be why this book could do well.
A lot of the things just don't apply to me. I am half crazy, but I don't absolutely dread change. Me and my fiancee sleep on different sides of the bed all the time. I am by no means a suave confident man, but never as neurotic as this woman is even on my bad days. I got a lot of laughs out of the cd. For some reason a line had me singing 'Mortal Kombat' for 20 mins in my car, and then I had to go and rewind the CD to hear what I had missed. That's not easy to do, because I think the song is only about 40 seconds long before you have to repeat it. Perhaps, I grew up too serious and unable to relate to the obsessions over things which I place no value on.
Although the book tries to teach women self-confidence, it pushes aside secrets of forming of healthy relationships, which I believe is far more important. The book is introspective, and doesn't venture too far from the womb.
Also, I couldn't help but feel that part of the 3rd cd was teaching women to learn how to self-pleasure themselves.
Cause I believe... Love is the answer.
I believveee... Love will find a way.
May 14, 2008
Quote from page 9:
"When you go through each day expecting what is happening outside of yourself to make you happy, you are setting yourself up for failure. You are setting yourself up for misery. You make yourself a victim of circumstances you cannot control and become dependent upon others for your own state of joy and contentment."
"When you go through each day expecting what is happening outside of yourself to make you happy, you are setting yourself up for failure. You are setting yourself up for misery. You make yourself a victim of circumstances you cannot control and become dependent upon others for your own state of joy and contentment."
September 15, 2011
This is a spiritual self-help book that Barbara De Angelis wrote and shared with us how we can create the happy, fulfilled life we have always dreamed of by using ten principles for total spiritual and emotional fulfilment. Each of the ten principles is given its own chapter to explain to us how using each one of these principles can help us to create the kind of true freedom we are all seeking, the freedom that comes from knowing how to tap into a powerful inner state of confidence, clarity and peace. This book gives us the tools to put in practice an inner centre of emotional and spiritual self-reliance. We learn how to discover a sense of real emotional security that nothing and no one can ever take away. We learn to experience the kind of lasting happiness you’ve always hoped was possible. We learn how to work with not against the flow of change and how to become bigger than your own fear. Discover that everything you need to be happy is inside you.
Barbara De Angelis Ph.D. is a world renowned relationships psychologist and counsellor. This is one of the best spiritual self-help books I have read if not the best. It is so easy to follow. You know how sometimes with these types of books they can be written in such a dull, complicated uninteresting way? Well this is not one of them! It is like chatting to a friend over a cup of coffee. It is guiding you but you don’t feel like you are being guided it is done in such a simple way that you remember everything that Barbara is telling us so it is so easy to learn the principles without having to take notes or re-read chapters. It is a very inspiring read and I certainly will be trying to put the ten principles in my own life. So you do get a lot out of reading this book. I will look forward to reading more of Barbara De Angelis books they are a brilliant read.
Barbara De Angelis Ph.D. is a world renowned relationships psychologist and counsellor. This is one of the best spiritual self-help books I have read if not the best. It is so easy to follow. You know how sometimes with these types of books they can be written in such a dull, complicated uninteresting way? Well this is not one of them! It is like chatting to a friend over a cup of coffee. It is guiding you but you don’t feel like you are being guided it is done in such a simple way that you remember everything that Barbara is telling us so it is so easy to learn the principles without having to take notes or re-read chapters. It is a very inspiring read and I certainly will be trying to put the ten principles in my own life. So you do get a lot out of reading this book. I will look forward to reading more of Barbara De Angelis books they are a brilliant read.
November 20, 2010
A very good book that gave me one key insight that unlocked a dilemma in my head. Even if all the other information didn't go in, this piece made it worth the read.
It goes something like this:
When you love someone and they do not love themselves, they reject your love because you make them feel inadequate. If they don't love themselves, there is little you can do to transmute love through osmosis to them. Love comes from only one source: within us. People do not give us love.. but they stimulate the part of ourselves that have immense love for ourselves.
It's a very logical deduction from Dr De Angelis that will help build the much needed boundaries. Looking forward to reading more of her wisdom. I will keep this by my bookshelf.
It goes something like this:
When you love someone and they do not love themselves, they reject your love because you make them feel inadequate. If they don't love themselves, there is little you can do to transmute love through osmosis to them. Love comes from only one source: within us. People do not give us love.. but they stimulate the part of ourselves that have immense love for ourselves.
It's a very logical deduction from Dr De Angelis that will help build the much needed boundaries. Looking forward to reading more of her wisdom. I will keep this by my bookshelf.
August 2, 2014
An inspiring book. surprised me by its beautiful simple style and the way that her thoughts echoed things I said and believed as unchangeable. It could serve as the base for living a better life and for being a better person. I'm not fond of self-help books. Probably I would have never read this book,if it had not been for my friend who recommended this book as her favourite book :) and she was right it is one of my favoutites now :D
August 12, 2021
SOOOOOOOOO GOOOOOOODD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
This book. So relevant and so useful/helpful to me at this exact time in my life. Some of what I read yesterday afternoon was relevant for a situation yesterday evening.
This book gave me hope, reminders, and wisdom. It encouraged me to reconnect with myself and to remember my purpose, to be loving, and to continue trying to be a better person. The pages were dripping with insight. I felt my own behaviour and thoughts changing for the better just from having read it. I handled situations better just from having some of the ideas/concepts in my mind.
The book was inspiring. Easy to read. Filled with a good balance of personal stories, spiritual/cultural stories to help explain principles, and Barbara's actual "secrets". I agreed with or saw value in majority of what she was saying in the book.
I don't want to spoil any of the 'secrets' of the book, because that's up to you to read and find out. But they were all worth reading about, and are good principles to live your life by. This is probably my top or one of the top self-help books I read in 2021.
The main criticism I had was there was a bit too much religion in the book for my preference ("God" this and "God" that, with references to Christianity) and sometimes it turned me off what the author was saying. But otherwise, it was a really well-done book. Super well-organized. The concepts went in a logical order that built on previous concepts. The reader goes on a journey with the author and she makes it so easy for you to do so.
My mom has a bunch of her books but now I want to buy this one too and highlight it, take detailed notes and use these "secrets"/concepts when I need a reminder to connect with myself and my higher purpose. Sometimes I get lost from that and this book was a great tool to pull me back. It's one of those books where the more open you are to what it has to say, the more it can help you. I'd have to say, it changed my life.
DEFINITELY a book I will be reading more than once - it is a book worth owning because you can re-read it multiple times and get something new out of it, or just be reminded of the important concepts again. The author clearly put good effort into it and worked really hard. This is the kind of book that deserves a good review; not only could I absolutely feel how much work was poured into it, but it was also so useful and successful at what it intended to do.
I already recommended it to someone right before I finished it, because I knew it would change their life.
Would recommend to everyone 15+. Really, everyone should read this book. Everyone will get SOMETHING out of it. Great self-help/spiritual book.
This book. So relevant and so useful/helpful to me at this exact time in my life. Some of what I read yesterday afternoon was relevant for a situation yesterday evening.
This book gave me hope, reminders, and wisdom. It encouraged me to reconnect with myself and to remember my purpose, to be loving, and to continue trying to be a better person. The pages were dripping with insight. I felt my own behaviour and thoughts changing for the better just from having read it. I handled situations better just from having some of the ideas/concepts in my mind.
The book was inspiring. Easy to read. Filled with a good balance of personal stories, spiritual/cultural stories to help explain principles, and Barbara's actual "secrets". I agreed with or saw value in majority of what she was saying in the book.
I don't want to spoil any of the 'secrets' of the book, because that's up to you to read and find out. But they were all worth reading about, and are good principles to live your life by. This is probably my top or one of the top self-help books I read in 2021.
The main criticism I had was there was a bit too much religion in the book for my preference ("God" this and "God" that, with references to Christianity) and sometimes it turned me off what the author was saying. But otherwise, it was a really well-done book. Super well-organized. The concepts went in a logical order that built on previous concepts. The reader goes on a journey with the author and she makes it so easy for you to do so.
My mom has a bunch of her books but now I want to buy this one too and highlight it, take detailed notes and use these "secrets"/concepts when I need a reminder to connect with myself and my higher purpose. Sometimes I get lost from that and this book was a great tool to pull me back. It's one of those books where the more open you are to what it has to say, the more it can help you. I'd have to say, it changed my life.
DEFINITELY a book I will be reading more than once - it is a book worth owning because you can re-read it multiple times and get something new out of it, or just be reminded of the important concepts again. The author clearly put good effort into it and worked really hard. This is the kind of book that deserves a good review; not only could I absolutely feel how much work was poured into it, but it was also so useful and successful at what it intended to do.
I already recommended it to someone right before I finished it, because I knew it would change their life.
Would recommend to everyone 15+. Really, everyone should read this book. Everyone will get SOMETHING out of it. Great self-help/spiritual book.
August 24, 2024
Fina baš.
January 23, 2019
Not only a wise book, but a liberating one. And... very nice to read. It made me laugh as well :)
March 1, 2023
If you can't afford therapy, there's self-help books!!! Dr. Barbara illuminates us to the wisdom each woman needs to advance. Often our elders give us rudimentary advice. (Sometimes not even that.) Our lives have entangling issues that we don't recognize the lessons behind each obstacle. When there's profound turbulence, it can blind us. With gratitude to our public library system, I secured a copy of this clear, thoughtful book.
Please utilize your public library services. There is no shame in borrowing books, CDs, DVDs, and other available items from our public library systems. Help yourself and visit the library!!!
Kudos to Dr. Barbara!!!
Please utilize your public library services. There is no shame in borrowing books, CDs, DVDs, and other available items from our public library systems. Help yourself and visit the library!!!
Kudos to Dr. Barbara!!!
May 2, 2009
The premise of life as a process to develop to one's fullest potential while helping others to do the same is so clear in this book. It is absolutely comforting to recognize that one's choice to love oneself serves as a gatekeeper to all other success in every area of life. I found this book very beneficial and Dr. DeAngelis' style is very warm and clear.
March 15, 2011
I read this years ago, when I was going through some tough times. I can honestly say that it helped in so many ways and I have since bought it as a gift for a few friends and recommended it to many! I have revisited this book time and again and it always puts things into perspective again.
April 13, 2025
Sometimes a book lands your hands just when you need it. In my case, I strolling through a charity shop with time to kill before a train, and a really challenging event the next day.
There’s nothing in there I haven’t heard before, and yes the whole thing is a bit dated. Even questioned if wanted it to be visible on my ‘read’ shelf. But the truth is the simplicity of the messages as 10 principles or rules was just what I needed at that moment. A great reminder that we are all ultimately responsible for our own happiness.
This copy was also annotated and underlined by the person before me. I like the journey of this book through the hands of people who needed to hear the messages and to think how it may have helped them in whatever they were going through.
There’s nothing in there I haven’t heard before, and yes the whole thing is a bit dated. Even questioned if wanted it to be visible on my ‘read’ shelf. But the truth is the simplicity of the messages as 10 principles or rules was just what I needed at that moment. A great reminder that we are all ultimately responsible for our own happiness.
This copy was also annotated and underlined by the person before me. I like the journey of this book through the hands of people who needed to hear the messages and to think how it may have helped them in whatever they were going through.
May 20, 2018
Got recommended by my friend, this book mentioned all perspectives of the life in a mindful way. The way we live, we think, we react with struggles - all of the experiences are perceived in a positive way when Barbara wrote this book. The book is suitable for those who really want to get a fundamental way to the definition of happiness.
What I like is about all the poems that reflect in each chapter, the positivity and all basic concerns about living has been mentioned in an easy way (Change, Love yourself, Growth mindset).
What I like is about all the poems that reflect in each chapter, the positivity and all basic concerns about living has been mentioned in an easy way (Change, Love yourself, Growth mindset).
June 21, 2023
I bought this book on Amazon April 2023.
The book was written in 1999 (25 years ago).
The book contains 10 chapters and is 261 pages long.
The book is easy to read and very well written by the author.
The sentences and the logic flow of the content is well done.
The title of the book is misleading, this is purely a self-help book that anyone can read.
It is not reference purely to women.
As I read a lot of self-help books, there is no new concepts I learnt in this book, rather a review of existing concepts already discussed by so many other authors.
4,5/5
The book was written in 1999 (25 years ago).
The book contains 10 chapters and is 261 pages long.
The book is easy to read and very well written by the author.
The sentences and the logic flow of the content is well done.
The title of the book is misleading, this is purely a self-help book that anyone can read.
It is not reference purely to women.
As I read a lot of self-help books, there is no new concepts I learnt in this book, rather a review of existing concepts already discussed by so many other authors.
4,5/5
December 8, 2021
This seems like one of those books that might come off preachy or useless but it actually resonated a lot with me. I appreciate De Angelis' examples and perspective and I believe this will be a timeless tome. There is a ton of value within these pages and I encourage anyone who just needs a little reminder of what humanity should be to read this one.
Read
February 3, 2022As a 75-year old male I don't need to read what a woman should know about men. But experience unlocked this secret: A man more than often dated a woman for a warm sexual relationship while she aimed at a professional husband. Sometimes the other way round. I'm sure that's why most marriages end in a divorce.
October 30, 2017
Overall, it's a book worth reading .
Author uses a positive voice and many examples to change your perspective of the world, also, has a more profound understanding of life.
The most I got out of it is : LOVE YOURSELF.
Love is the answer .
Author uses a positive voice and many examples to change your perspective of the world, also, has a more profound understanding of life.
The most I got out of it is : LOVE YOURSELF.
Love is the answer .
March 5, 2019
If you have ever felt an emptiness in you soul then this book will surely help you understand what is and from where it comes. This book has been a blessing to me at this time of my life. So many things finally make sense to me now. I'm in awe!
February 29, 2020
I loved the honesty and stories in the book. Barbara’s style is different in that you feel while reading every page that she is with you, sharing a cup of coffee and some “aha moments” only friends understand. A great every to every woman you know
May 5, 2025
A motivational and uplifting read. This book offers gentle but powerful reminders about self-worth, perspective, and living with intention. It felt like having a wise friend speaking directly to the heart.
November 1, 2017
Love it
I read it every single year
I read it every single year
June 23, 2018
So trite!
December 28, 2018
This book felt like all things I already knew...but so many more positive reviews here make me wonder if there were gems that I missed.
June 1, 2020
Self empowerment, psychology and personal development. An attractively written book, clearly structured and a combination of familiar and new insights. Recommended reading.
February 9, 2022
من افضل الكتب اللي مرت عليه، صحيح هو العنوان اسرار عن الحياة يجب ان اعرفها كل امراءة بس اشوفه يفيد الكل رجالا ونساءا. باربرا من افضل الكتاب وتكتب من قلبها.
June 17, 2023
I took some great pointers out of this book.
November 6, 2018
I have to thank my cousin-in-law for shoving this book at me. I’ve read plenty of new age self help books but this one was simply ...simple. SO easy to read, SO comprehensible, SO relatable ...my lightbulb is on.
If you want to understand How Life Works, it’s a must read. And certainly not only for women.
If you want to understand How Life Works, it’s a must read. And certainly not only for women.
December 16, 2019
I actually really liked this book. Up until rule 8 or 9. I thought 10 was a softball.
The book is a great intro to spirituality. It provides very good stories, examples, and analogies to help those who aren't as spiritual get an understanding of what it means to be... as some of the spiritual stuff we normally see can be 'really out there'. This is a good step to bridge reality with something more.
Some of the stories are a bit long and tedious but I do enjoy the overall structure of the book. I would recommend this to anyone seeking some general good advice to live by... the more spiritual books I read, the more resonance I see from this book to theirs. Whilst if I had read those books first, it would feel a bit too dense and far removed (for instance, if your first book was something by Eckhart Tolle, you could be really confused; however, reading Singer and Chopra first, their writings are targeted towards a general audience. Building a foundation of spiritual 101 prior to getting in some denser material).
I think this is a very good book to start your journey into spirituality especially if you haven't had any before.
The book is a great intro to spirituality. It provides very good stories, examples, and analogies to help those who aren't as spiritual get an understanding of what it means to be... as some of the spiritual stuff we normally see can be 'really out there'. This is a good step to bridge reality with something more.
Some of the stories are a bit long and tedious but I do enjoy the overall structure of the book. I would recommend this to anyone seeking some general good advice to live by... the more spiritual books I read, the more resonance I see from this book to theirs. Whilst if I had read those books first, it would feel a bit too dense and far removed (for instance, if your first book was something by Eckhart Tolle, you could be really confused; however, reading Singer and Chopra first, their writings are targeted towards a general audience. Building a foundation of spiritual 101 prior to getting in some denser material).
I think this is a very good book to start your journey into spirituality especially if you haven't had any before.
May 29, 2025
LOVE this book! So many things have stuck with me in my every day life. Can’t wait to read another of hers.
July 28, 2016
A brilliant fun, book, that gives ideas about how to look at life in some interesting and helpful ways. It is a book that for me, was really helpful when life was challenging me. I'd pick it up, read, feel better. put it down, pick it up again, read, feel better. And so it went on. It reminded me to not get stuck in thinking about things in the wrong way. it I love all her books. For me a reall inspiring and helpful book.
The only thing I didn't understand about his book was that she limited her audience by using the word woman In her title. This is really a book that applies to both sexes.
The only thing I didn't understand about his book was that she limited her audience by using the word woman In her title. This is really a book that applies to both sexes.
Displaying 1 - 30 of 59 reviews