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Never Pick Up Hitch-Hikers!

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When Alf Jarrett spots the hitch-hiker waiting on the motorway slip-road, he thinks his prayers have been answered. William Banks is a personable young man of twenty, just leaving home for the first time—perfect for what Alf has in mind.
And when William is offered a free night’s lodging and the chance to repay Alf for the lift, he accepts eagerly. After all, it sounds simple enough—drop off a package at a block of flats and post the spare key through the letter-box.
What William doesn't realise is that he is the intended victim in a sinister plan of arson and murder. And it is only his good fortune—and the timely intervention of a guardian angel in the form of a charming girl called Calli—that saves him from becoming a corpse...
Thrown involuntarily into a case that involves mistaken identity and a bank robbery from which the spoils have never been recovered, the two young sleuths discover they aren’t the only ones on the trail...And there is another murder and a dramatic confrontation before the tangled threads are finally unravelled.

248 pages, Mass Market Paperback

First published January 1, 1976

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About the author

Ellis Peters

208 books1,146 followers
A pseudonym used by Edith Pargeter.

Edith Mary Pargeter, OBE, BEM was a prolific author of works in many categories, especially history and historical fiction, and was also honoured for her translations of Czech classics; she is probably best known for her murder mysteries, both historical and modern. Born in the village of Horsehay (Shropshire, England), she had Welsh ancestry, and many of her short stories and books (both fictional and non-fictional) were set in Wales and its borderlands.

During World War II, she worked in an administrative role in the Women's Royal Naval Service, and received the British Empire Medal - BEM.

Pargeter wrote under a number of pseudonyms; it was under the name Ellis Peters that she wrote the highly popular series of Brother Cadfael medieval mysteries, many of which were made into films for television.

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5 stars
156 (41%)
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133 (35%)
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74 (19%)
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 41 reviews
Profile Image for Sarah.
35 reviews16 followers
May 25, 2012
This is not one of Ellis Peters' George Felse or Brother Cadfael mysteries, but I really enjoyed it. Young Willie Banks is hitch-hiking to the town of Braybourne when he is picked up by a man who gives him a package to deliver and a key to a residence in that town. Willie delivers the package but does not stay, which turns out to be a good thing, as it contained a fire bomb. Thus is Willie thrown into the middle of an attempt to retrieve a quarter of a million pounds stolen from a Braybourne bank three years before. Can Willie evade the thief who hid the money (and who was supposed to have died in the fire), the thief's partners, the thief's wife and girlfriend, and a London gang come to separate the money from the thief? Definately a good read.
Profile Image for Anne White.
Author 34 books386 followers
October 15, 2024
I really liked this one. Lots of action but not too much gore.
Profile Image for Lois Bujold.
Author 190 books39.3k followers
September 20, 2013

I ordered this from the library due to an internet review that mentioned it as funny. When it arrived, I was rather put off by the blurb on the cover that described it (inaccurately, happily) as "a chilling novel of suspense". It proved to be more nearly a cozy thriller, if that's not a contradiction in terms.

I was familiar with Peters from some of her later, more popular Brother Cadfael historical mysteries. This was an earlier then-contemporary -- mid-70s -- set in a provincial British market town, a concept that I was better able to picture after recently watching most of _Kingdom_ (a TV show with such a setting starring Stephen Fry as a market-town lawyer, er, solicitor). In Hitchikers, an earnest and likeable young man stumbles into a caper-in-progress, and proceeds to muck up the villains' plans in many unexpected ways.

It was written in omniscient viewpoint, with a distinct separate (and opinionated, mainly in its wry disapproval of 70s modernity) narrator's voice, which allowed the story to range over many viewpoints, including our sympathetic protagonists, the two crews of bad guys/gals working at cross-purposes, and the police. Wide in scope but emotionally distancing, as omniscient tends to be, it suited the slightly goofy plot.

In Georgette Heyer's The Reluctant Widow, a particularly feckless young male secondary character remarks ingenuously, "I cannot imagine what women find to be doing all day about the house!" This seems to also be true of a lot of male writers. Peters, naturally, doesn't have this problem, and the female characters both sympathetic and un- get stage time, interior development, and agency (in a 70s sort of way), at least to the same limits as the male characters.

Ta, L.

Profile Image for Charles  van Buren.
1,910 reviews303 followers
March 30, 2018
Not one of her best

By Charles van Buren on March 30, 2018

Format: Kindle Edition

I am an Ellis Peters fan but this novel is just not up to her usual standard. There are overblown and excessive descriptions of just about every location and character in the book. Without the excesses in the descriptions, the book would, at best, be a novella. At one point, two characters, Stan and Beattie, begin walking towards an address. About seven pages of the approximately fifteen recounting the walk, describe streets, buildings and parking lots passed along the way. Shortly after this tour, I abandoned the book - the only Ellis Peters novel which I began but did not finish. There is also the problem that the two main characters are really irritating people who, at the beginning, have no good reason not to leave everything to the police. If a mystery is going to have amateurs conducting an investigation, there needs to be a good reason for it. Something such as trying to clear themselves or others from being accused of the crime.
Profile Image for Magda.
1,218 reviews38 followers
October 23, 2013
Superb. Most young sleuth pairs are more twee than I really care for, but these two protagonists (as it were) are sensible and sweet enough to fall for each other in a natural manner... all the while staying one step ahead of at least two crime gangs and the police (whom they involve just as a matter of course, but keeping their hands in). Very fun read.
3,334 reviews22 followers
April 6, 2020
I have read this several times and never get tired of it, despite knowing almost exactly what is going to happen. What I think I like best is the subtle humor that underlies the story, almost as if the author had her tongue firmly in her cheek throughout. this very quick-paced romp is hard to put down, and full of memorable characters. Highly recommended.
Profile Image for Kelly.
1,034 reviews72 followers
April 17, 2020
Highly amusing and fun little mystery/thriller in the classic style.

Alas that Ellis Peters will not be able to write more mysteries with William Banks as the main character!
Profile Image for Barbara Howe.
Author 9 books11 followers
January 27, 2023
On his way to the British town of New Braybourne, where he is supposed to be studying art, twenty-year-old William (Willie) Banks hitchhikes to save money, instead of taking the train. (This story is set in the 1970s, when hitchhiking was still common, although already in decline.) Willie’s journey with Alf, the driver who picks him up, seems pleasant enough, but when they arrive in New Braybourne, it’s late. Too late to expect that Willie’s new landlady, only spoken to over the phone, would still be up and willing to let him in. Alf makes an offer: if Willie will save Alf some time by delivering a package to Alf’s sister’s flat, a few blocks from the middle of town, Willie can spend the night there. Alf’s sister and brother-in-law are away; all Willie has to do is lock up in the morning and drop the spare key in the letter box. Willie agrees. Alf drops him off in the middle of town with his suitcase and the package, and hurries on his way home.

Willie looks for the flat but misses a landmark, and asks the first pedestrian he sees—Calli, a young woman on her way home from a dance club—for directions. Interest sparks between the two. He tells her what he’s doing, and she smells something fishy—who trusts a total stranger enough to let them spend the night alone in their, or their sister’s, flat? She convinces him it’s not a good idea to spend the night there, although she’s not certain why. Together, they deliver the package and continue on to her flat, where he spends the night on her sofa. (Who trusts a total stranger…? Hmm. Anyway, the romance in this story is squeaky clean.)

In the morning, the news reports a fire in the flat they delivered the package to, and that a body, charred beyond recognition, was found after the fire was extinguished. The police think that the dead man is Alf’s brother-in-law, Stan Bastable. Stan was a fugitive, wanted for his part in a successful bank burglary a few years earlier. The money was never recovered, and with rumours flying in the criminal underworld that Stan was back in town, the other men involved in the theft and several members of a London-based organised-crime family have converged on New Braybourne. They, plus his abandoned wife, all want a share in the stolen fortune.

Willie and Callie, of course, go to the police, after realising that the package they delivered was probably the incendiary device. The fire was carefully planned to make the police think that Stan was dead, and Willie was supposed to have been the dead body. But then, who really was the victim of the fire? And is Willie in danger, if Alf discovers that he is still alive?

Ellis Peters is better known for her series of Brother Cadfael medieval mysteries, but Never Pick Up Hitch-Hikers is a standalone novel in a more modern setting, contemporary with the 1970s, when it was published. The story is nicely plotted, but once the question of the identity of the dead body is answered, it isn’t much of a mystery. We’re shown who commits murder, and why, as the story progresses. The unanswered questions become: Where is the stolen money hidden? Who will find it first, Stan or Willie? And if Willie finds it before the thieves do, will he survive?

Despite gunshots and stabbings (thankfully not gory), this isn’t much of a thriller, either. In fact, it feels more like a farce, with swapped handbags, mistaken identities, a confused landlady, and our two innocents, Willie and Calli, stumbling onto important clues. There is a nighttime procession of criminals and police through the town’s streets and back alleys, and a wonderfully comic encounter in a restaurant between most of the players, not all of them aware of who the others are.

It is, in short, a quick, easy, lightweight story, though somewhat old-fashioned, with several memorable characters and a sweet romance. What more can one ask for in entertainment?

This review was first published on This Need to Read.
1,613 reviews26 followers
April 2, 2023
Donald Westlake, move over.

American Donald Westlake was famous for his hilarious crime caper books ("The Busy Body" being his most famous.) Who would have thought that a sheltered English spinster known for her "Brother Cadfael" mysteries could also write a wonderfully funny book in which bumbling low-level criminals, smooth Mafia types, provincial cops, and two naive young folks would collide over a stash of stolen money?

And aren't crime family wives and mothers subservient to their menfolks? I thought so, too, but then I met Mrs Jessamine ("Jess") Jarrett Bastable, not a lady I'm likely to forget. The daughter, sister, and wife of career criminals, she's well aware that she's smarter than her brother and better organized and more disciplined than her husband. She's not going to let their deficiencies deprive her of a rich life in a tropical paradise.

In a rare stroke of good luck, Stanley Bastable, Alf Jarrett, and two co-horts have managed to steal a fortune from a local bank and hide it successfully. The question is, can they retrieve it and live happily ever after? Remember that the police haven't given up on finding the loot and arresting the guilty parties.

The local coppers are refreshingly competent, but the Braybourne bank robbers are far more afraid of a gang of London criminals who've shown up in search of the missing money. Chief Inspector Cope is youngish, intelligent, and sophisticated, but so is the leader of the fearsome Match gang. Finding the loot and arresting the bank robbers would be a feather in Cope's hat, but the Match gang aren't interested in feathers. They want that money in their pockets and don't care who they have to kill to get it. Greed usually beats professional ambition hands down.

The wild card is William Anthony Patrick Banks, twenty years old and the only child of his forceful widowed mother. Determined to strike out on his own, Willie tells her he's going to Braybourne to attend art school. Wanting to save his money for adventures, Willie decides to hitchhike and Alf Jarrett sees the gullible young Banks as the answer to a prayer. Here's the sacrificial lamb who will convince the police that ringleader Stanley Bastable is dead and (hopefully) cause them to stop looking for the money and the men who stole it.

But Willie is smarter than he looks and sounds and he soon has a partner who leavens his intelligence with a large dollop of common sense and street smarts. Calliope (Calli) Francis is incensed to learn that Willie's become a pawn in such a dangerous game and decides he won't be safe until the criminals are caught. From that point on, it's Calli versus Jess and may the best woman win!

This book was published in the mid-1970's and its elderly author has a great deal to say about brainless modern youth and their strange clothes, hairstyles, and music. She's even more scathing about Labour government schemes to "improve" the English countryside by bulldozing charming small villages to create large, poorly designed "town centres" filled with jerry-built construction. She was right, of course, although it's important to remember that many working class English DID benefit from those schemes.

You may need a score card to keep track of the shifting alliances, not to mention the fact that most criminals adopt an alias (or two) to throw the Angel of Death off their tracks. What you won't need is an excuse to laugh. It's a very funny book with some great characters. The Grand Finale is a hoot and makes me wonder why no movie producer has made a film of this one. It has as much dramatic potential as any book I've ever read.

Maybe some day I'll get around to reading the highly regarded Brother Cadfael books. In the meantime, I'm grateful to have stumbled onto this unknown gem.
Profile Image for Mary's Bookshelf.
541 reviews61 followers
January 27, 2024
I have read many books by Ellis Peters, chiefly among the Brother Cadfael series. Ms. Peters was an active writer from 1951 to her death in the mid-90's. This mystery thriller from 1976 falls in the middle of her career and just before she embarked on creating Brother Cadfael. Unlike the Cadfael books, which are historical mysteries, Never Pick Up Hitch-Hikers! is a contemporary thriller, set in the Midlands of England. There is quite a bit of humor to leaven the darker aspects of a mystery thriller.

William Banks is a restless young man. He is tired of living with his widowed mother, so he comes up with a plan to move to a nearby town where he claims he will go to art school. To save a bit of money, he decides to hitch-hike to Brayborne. He is picked up by a truck driver, Alf Jarrett, who asks William if he would do him a favor--deliver a package to his brother-in-law's apartment to save Alf a detour late at night. William agrees, but he gets lost on the way to the apartment and asks directions from a young woman he meets on the street. Calli Francis, a young art shop clerk, helps him find the apartment, but urges William not to linger there. And what a piece of luck that was! That night there is an explosion and fire in the apartment that kills someone who was sleeping there.

And that leads into a plan by a group of thieves to retrieve the money they stole from a bank three years before. Stan Bastable has been lying low, but now he thinks he can throw the police off his tracks and sneak into town to get the money. But a larger and more powerful gang from London has heard rumors about the plan and they try to move in. In the meantime, William and Calli contact the police about the package delivered to the mysterious apartment. Now the stage is set for a caper, a murder or two, and some amateur detecting.

There are many characters and some overlapping plots, but Ms. Peters handles them with aplomb. The various gang members and their women are described vividly, making it easy to keep track of who is who. William is an inventive thinker who is able to move a step or two in front of the gangs. The story moves along at a good pace and wraps up the various strands in a satisfactory manner. The tone of the story is both ironic and lighthearted. I could wish that the titles wasn't so silly because it doesn't really reflect the story.
Recommended for readers who enjoy classic mysteries.
5 reviews
August 26, 2018
One of her best. Peters is best known, I think, for her Cadfael series. This book is of a different breed.

Mysteries, but I have always favored her other books. This is one is very fine. The Characters are well revealed and of course there is that wonderful story. Peters writes with humor and leaves the reader with a sense of ease. If you like characters and a good tale which never needs gratuitous sex and violence.....this is a great example of good English story-,telling.

108 reviews
March 28, 2023
What a great story!

I’ve loved every story by Ellis Peters I’ve read (and that is most of them). This was among the few remaining that I had not read and it may be my favorite yet. What a delight. I wish she could have lived and kept on writing forever. This one is rather more lighthearted than most of her stories and a bit shorter. It’s a perfect pick-me-up, fast-paced action/mystery with a hint of romance to draw one out of the winter doldrums or take to the summertime beach or shady garden.
Profile Image for M. O'Gannon.
Author 8 books2 followers
July 23, 2023
Never Pick Up Hitchhikers – A Classic Whodunit Novel – Published 1976 - **** - William Banks is alive or dead or maybe alive again. Peters/Pargeter brings some light hearted crime fiction to life with the tale of a young man that seems to step into trouble wherever he walks. Though there are a few murders, the flavor is enjoyable and creative. A cross between Agatha Christie and P.G. Wodehouse. A great read for a rainy Saturday. It may have been published in 1976, but the book is still a fun read today.
1 review
August 31, 2024
One of Ellis Peters’ best

I read anything I can find by Ellis Peters. Sometimes it is a little hard to get through the first chapter or two, but not with this book. It grabbed me immediately. Even with the harder intros, I persist, because I know by midway in each book, I will be ignoring my responsibilities in order to get to the climax. I’ve read Brother Cadfael, the Felse investigations, and now these stand alone mysteries. I think I am nearing the end of her works and that will indeed be a sad day.
Profile Image for Deirdre.
677 reviews4 followers
November 16, 2024
This was very enjoyable. More complex than your average Peters - more characters and shifting alliances - but she makes it believable and clear. I like William and Calli, and the scheming of other characters, particularly of Jess and Stan, is fascinatingly horrifying. You get the impression with this one that Peters' tongue is in her cheek more or less the whole time. The description of one of the characters as ''young, and shallow as a village pond'' is particularly excellent.

Some scathing social commentary on England's poor urban development in the 70s doesn't hurt, either!
Profile Image for Rachael Robbins.
209 reviews6 followers
August 4, 2025
William Banks wants to move out from under his mother's expectations so hatches a plot to "attend art school." While hitchhiking there, he is picked up by a friendly man named Alf who asks him to deliver a package. Unfortunately, the package turns out to be a firebomb and the apartment goes up in flames. If it hadn't been for Calli - William would have been the unidentifiable body. Instead, he and Callie become involved in an increasingly messy plot. Several gangs, renegade crooks, William, and the police are all after a quarter of a million dollars - but who will get there first?
Profile Image for Daniela Sorgente.
345 reviews44 followers
February 9, 2022
The author of this book is Brother Cadfael's Ellis Peters. We have a murder, various identity swaps, misunderstandings, the hidden loot of a bank robbery and a treasure hunt to find it. Our hero is an ingenious boy, a little naive, who is involved in spite of himself. At the beginning of the book he leaves for a destination that he will never reach in the whole story. It is an amusing and entertaining thriller, I enjoyed it very much.
Profile Image for Kally Sheng.
471 reviews15 followers
May 3, 2022
Very entertaining and enjoyable

I am only sorry it took me longer than anticipated to finish reading the book.
What a charming and readily believable story to read. I am pleasantly surprised, the book was written and published back in 1976, yet the setting and storyline are still current.
64 reviews1 follower
March 7, 2023
Or Perhaps Five Stars

Ellis Peters writes beautifully. The question of whether this book deserves four stars or five stars comes down to the issue of whether poor decisions by a main character are believable or not. I will not spoil the book for you by examining the decisions. But I suspect you will figure out who I am talking about, and decide the issue for yourself.
Profile Image for Reynolds Darke.
401 reviews2 followers
October 28, 2018
A good book from 1976 about a bank heist, stashed loot and two innocents in the way of the recovery of the loot three years later. It has a light touch, a little romance and very little suspense - its just not that kind of story.
4 reviews
May 13, 2021
never pick up th I s book!

I had to wake myself up several times and finally quit putting in time on this book. Boring. I chose it because of the excellent fun of cadfael. A waste of time.
Profile Image for Vicki.
476 reviews13 followers
November 27, 2023
Delightfully comic thwarted robbery mystery

Author Ellis Peters has crafted a convoluted and entertaining twist in this mystery, in which the criminals are out-witted by the wholesome young hitchhiker, to whom they had offered a deal so good he couldn’t refuse.
Profile Image for Lias.
10 reviews
May 11, 2024
Normaalgesproken niet mijn genre maar ik heb het boek toch uitgelezen. Elk hoofdstuk eindigt met een spannende cliffhanger en het is zo geschreven dat het boek heel vlot leest. Aanrader voor wie van goede crime thrillers houdt!
Profile Image for Jean.
404 reviews
April 27, 2025
What a cool book tjis guy is such a sweet innocent that any girll woułd love him. Then he turns out to be smart and logical and non violent and helpful and loves his mother and solves the case. What more can you ask for?
368 reviews1 follower
June 14, 2017
3,5 honestly, 4 for fun chaos crimi & pleasent end
188 reviews2 followers
October 5, 2020
Ellis Peters spins a great yarn. I look forward to meeting willie Banks and Calliope Francis again!
94 reviews
February 5, 2025
I absolutely adored this book! Charming lead characters, a wonderful array of villains and a lovely ironic writing style. A bit dated perhaps but really a great read! Wanted more!
Profile Image for Keeley.
599 reviews12 followers
March 11, 2025
Another slightly odd standalone crime thriller from Peters. Enjoyable characters, though she telegraphs the plot twists a bit too obviously in this one.
470 reviews
September 4, 2025
Well written - believable characters - good plot - happy ending for most!
Displaying 1 - 30 of 41 reviews

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