So, I guess it’s time for an additive to that old adage of “Don’t Judge A Book By A Cover” and tack on, “Don’t Buy A Book Based On Its Title”. In Home Alone, Kevin McCallister halts in front of the steps leading upstairs saying, “The third floor... It’s scary up there.” So, with fingers crossed, I bought this Kindle book and hoped that Moore’s version of the third floor would be scary.
Unfortunately, I never once felt scared, or even remotely pleased with this reading experience. The writing was clunky and just not very engaging. At times, it crossed the lines into being downright laughable. Take this sentence for example: “Liz lay there, praying for sleep or a stroke or anything that would render her unconscious.” In addition, to this type of callous and ridiculous phrasing, there were missing commas, inconsistent verb tenses used and some downright stiff characters. The phrasing never flowed smoothly and the author’s tangents on guitars were simply dull.
The characters had internal conflicts, but they never felt authentic. In fact, I never once cared about any of them. With their poor decision making (like Liz heard voices and immediately called the police, but when her stepson and herself began violently throwing up blood and he started Ebola-like eye, nose and ear bleeding she easily wrote off the possibility of going to the hospital), it was hard to feel any sympathy for any of them. This also impacted the “fear factor” of the whole book, as without that sympathy, their plight never felt remotely scary.
Some other details were downright confusing - there was scene with smoking inside the hospital! The Indoor Clean Air Act went up in the early 1990s, so it would have been nice to have other indicators if that was the year this story was set. In addition, it took Liz months to change the sheets - which considering the descriptions of the heat was pretty disgusting. The conclusion also felt very rushed. None of the “scary” moments felt fresh or original. I was actually amazed that I read this book all the way to the end... It simply was not what I was hoping for at all.