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Noir in Pink
Now do not get me wrong. I do not have any prejudice against skirts having the vote. I mean, I figure the same bums are going to be in office whether the ladies are suffragizing or not. Right? But putting a luscious tomato on the payroll to be a detective in a noir mystery in the 1940s, that just is not jake.
This tale of ratiocinating has more holes in it than Al Capone's Valentine’s Day party guests.
For instance, Faye Quick, the frail of which I am talking, was the secretary in the employ of a real gumshoe and she just pecked on the typewriter all day and fetched his java until World War II happened and he got his ticket from Uncle Sam and went off with the Marines to invade some sun-drenched tropical isle. Quick had rode along with her boss on stakeouts on one occasion or two and that apparently qualified her to take over his detecting racket after his ship sailed. Don't sound copacetic ta me.
Then some snappy looker gets whacked and after Quick noodles out that the initials what appear in some documents are clues to the identity of the murderer, and we eventually we tumble to the fact a whole mess of red-herrings share some of those same initials. Hey! Like that happens every day, right?
Quick's character is not as highly developed as her bosoms. Despite being a dame, Quick speaks just like the tough, cynical PIs you expect to find in legit noir mysteries. The only way you can tell this gat-totting broad is a gal with your eyes shut is that she sometimes wishes she had some new silk stockings to cover her gams.
The book was written in the vernacular, which if I remember correctly, is what the hoi polloi call a broad’s boudoir. Quick talks like me, using the same slang, phrases, spellings, and sin tax as I do here. It gets annoying. Real annoying.
Now, maybe you're of the opinion that the snappy dialog in noir mysteries is half the fun, but the dialog in this book is so wooden that Noah could have used it to build an ark. I found it was distracting and made the story hard to follow, and it’s not like my lips was moving when I was reading it.
🌟🌟Stars. Faye Quick, girl PI, is probably not going to like what I said here, but I figure, if she can't stand the heat, she should have stayed in the kitchen.