The Yarn Whisperer: My Unexpected Life in Knitting

by Clara Parkes

Stockinette, ribbing, cables, even the humble yarn over can instantly evoke places, times, people, conversations, all those poignant moments that we’ve tucked away in our memory banks. Over time, those stitches form a map of our lives.
—From the preface in 

The Yarn Whisperer: Reflections on a Life in Knitting, renowned knitter and author Clara Parkes ponders the roles knitting plays in her life via 22 captivating, poignant, and laugh-out-loud funny essays. Recounting tales of childhood and adulthood, family, friends, adventure, privacy, disappointment, love, and celebration, she hits upon the universal truths that drive knitters to create and explores the ways in which knitting can be looked at as a metaphor for so many other things. Put simply, �No matter how perfect any one sweater may be, it’s only human to crave another. And another, and another.”

Genres: Knitting, Nonfiction, Memoir, Essays, Crafts, Audiobook, Biography

160 pages, Hardcover

First published September 3, 2013

About the author

CLARA PARKES left her career in the booming high-tech industry to pursue her love of knitting. She lives on the coast of Maine in a farmhouse full of yarn. She is the publisher of KnittersReview.com and a contributor to Interweave Knits."

Reviews

[Whit · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book makes me want to pack up my stash of yarn and drive across the country to meet Clara Parkes in Maine foe a latte and some knitting

[Bonnie Brody · Rating 5 out of 5]

I have been a fan of Clara Parkes' Knitters Review forever and have loved her other three books. This one is no exception. It is written with the yarn lover and knitter in mind. The book contains no patterns, but rather is a collection of reminiscences or essays by Ms. Parkes. She talks about her life as it relates to knitting and yarn. "This book is a collection of my own musings on stitches - why we work them, what they do to fabric, and how they have contributed to the fabric of my own life. For life really is a stitch. It has a beginning, a midpoint, and an end. It serves a purpose, and if we're lucky, it creates something beautiful and enduring."

There is one essay that relates to steeks - sometimes we have to make a cut in something in order to give it a chance to become whole. In the chapter about the choreography of stitches she discusses her move to Tucson and the discovery of the rodeo. She also learns square dancing. She looks at myriad stitches and designers and compares them to different types of choreography. For instance, Kaffe Fassett is a modern choreographer and other designers are more traditional. There is a poignant essay about her parents' divorce and her trip cross-country. The essay on stashes really spoke to me. I have so much yarn that I could open my own yarn shop. Ms. Parkes discusses the need to cull stashes and compares them to gardens. "As hard as it is to say, I should point out that a healthy stash requires frequent and prudent weeding. It can easily get overrun before we notice what's happening". In her essay called Stitch Traffic she gives very sound advice, that "putting blind faith in anything is rarely a good idea, whether it's a GPS or a knitting pattern. It's far better to develop your own instinct, learn for yourself what works and what doesn't - and learn why". The discussions on swatching and slipped stitches are both humorous and poignant, pointing to the importance of connection and standing firm. In The Great Whodunit, Ms. Parkes talks about how "a good mystery book can be like a good knitting pattern. It takes you on an adventure, engages your mind, paints a pretty landscape, maybe even surprises you now and then, but always reaches the expected resolution." In Coming Undone, the author takes on the negative connotation of unraveling and provides a more positive definition like disentangling or solving a problem. I know that when I undo my knitting it is always to make it look better or to correct an error. I like the idea proposed in Making Martha's Sandwich, that any knitter is a real knitter, no matter how advanced they may or may not be.

She writes with a serious, poignant and humorous manner, providing some history of knitting in several essays. As the book cover states, she "uses the metaphor of knitting to tell her own story". There are 22 essays that deal with topics such as divorce, leaving the bustle of dot coms for a more leisurely life in Maine where she lives in a town of 920 people with her partner, and the relationship of baking to knitting. I am an avowed knitter but do not read many knitting books. I read Clara Parkes for her wisdom, down-to-earth manner, knowledge and wisdom. I love it when she states that "'happily ever after' is a moving target. No matter how perfect any one sweater may be, it's only human to crave another. And another. And another." I would recommend this book to anyone who knits and loves yarns.

[Dillwynia Peter · Rating 1 out of 5]

So - what did I learn from this book??

Mills Women's College in Berkeley CA is a liberal arts college that has a strong tradition in the feminist movement & has produced some notable women in US history;

It takes some days to drive from the East to the West coast;

Parkes comes from a strong musical & scientific family;

Renovation costs in North America are the same the First World over: they run over budget & time & are very inconvenient;

Clara Parkes is a lesbian, but doesn't throw it in your face (which I quite enjoyed).

Note there is nothing mentioned here about either YARN or KNITTING. There is very little about yarn or knitting that makes the title worthy - unless it is sarcastic joke. I thought when the title a "noun" whisperer was used in contemporary parliance it meant you had adept skills in this "noun". Obviously, I have misunderstood this modern phrase.

I know quite a bit about knitting, but even Elizabeth Zimmermann's books that are part bio, part knitting technique are more engaging & I enjoyed rereading about techniques I am very familiar with, so this wasn't the issue when I approached this book.

These series of essays are patchy: some are wonderfully constructed, and others are really light on in content, and so are quite weak. One or two analogies just simply don't work at all, or require extensive explanation they are so obtuse.

I used to work in an office of late GenY/ early GenX and they have this really infuriating habit of being shown a skill, they practice it twice & suddenly, they feel they are Masters of the Universe regarding that skill & move on. Regarding their capabilities, the reverse is quite the fact. From reading this book, I felt Ms Parkes behaves in a similar fashion.

I am so pleased I never wasted a single cent on buying a copy, but was loaned a friend's copy who's damning praise was: It's a light read!

I am not recommending this to anyone.

[Andie · Rating 1 out of 5]

I really like Parkes' website, The Knitter's Review, so I was looking forward to this collection of personal essays. Unfortunately, not only does the book feel rushed and shallow, Parkes just isn't a very good writer. She's fond of elaborate, strained analogies: knitting is like dancing! baking! driving! like sitting in a coffee shop waiting for someone! None of these analogies work very well, and her tendencies to give knit stitches anthropomorphized emotions doesn't help. Most of the essays lacked a focus, and came to no firm conclusion, simply petering out with some variation of "Knitting is [fill in the blank]. And isn't that just like life?"

Elizabeth Zimmerman she is not.

The personal reflections were somewhat more interesting, and I got the feeling the author would have rather have written a straight-up memoir. Unfortunately, these elements were -- pardon the pun -- grafted clumsily onto her musings about yarn, wool, knitting, etc. And the more I read, the less I liked the person revealed in these reflections. Maybe if the book was strictly autobiographical, I could have gotten a better picture of who the author is as a person. As it is, I was left with a shallow and rather stereotypical impression of a fairly priviledged woman obsessed with knitting and living a Martha Stewart-style rural idyll. There's even an essay about the time she "almost" got to make a sandwich for Martha Stewart -- what a thrill!

I respect Parkes' opinions on wool, yarn, technique, etc, but I'll avoid her more personal writing from now on.

[Susie · Rating 3 out of 5]

Well, that was charming. Clara shared little anecdotes about the life and related them back to different aspects of knitting. I listened to this on audio. It was a cozy treat.

[Alex · Rating 2 out of 5]

I really looked forward to reading this -- short essays about knitting?! Two of my favourite things! The first half of the book annoyed me so much that I put it down and almost returned it to the library unfinished. I'm glad I kept going because the few final essays focus on rural life and knitting as a family tradition; these were really well written and resonated strongly with me.

There were some really personal opinions of the author that seemed to be thrown in completely unnecessarily and not very thoughtfully. Attended a women's college but points out that she wasn't interested in feminism. Perhaps it's a case of being from a different generation and very different from the target demographic for this book, but some pieces hit me in a similar way and left me feeling like the author wanted to share some smug opinion or weird bias but hadn't thought through how to do it in a way that wasn't alienating.

Overall, kind of cutesy. Some overstretched metaphors that were a bit cringy. If you like reading abstractly about knitting and life and memoirs, maybe you'll like this. Otherwise, stick to the Yarn Harlot for your knit laughs.

[Georgia · Rating 4 out of 5]

Another nice little niche knitting book from Clara Parkes. I enjoyed the short story format and the anthropomorphism of stitches and needles made me chuckle.

[penny shima glanz · Rating 5 out of 5]

From the author of three detailed reference books for knitters, we are treated to 22 lovely essays about the way knitting and yarn have influenced and enhanced Parkes' life. Each word is as well thought out as a carefully placed stitch, knitting words together seamlessly without any disruptive duplicate stitch jarring the reader.

While it's easy to curl up and devour this slim book in a single evening (with a side-order of tea and snuggly kittens), I believe this volume is best enjoyed slowly, savoring each essay. I waited a very long time to receive my copy of this title so it was not possible to take the slow approach, but I do plan on rereading and enjoying these essays again.

One quote that spoke to me the most is about purling, or perhaps myself:
"Purling is the introvert stitch. It requires that you focus on /you/ looking inward instead of outward" (p 50). Yes. Thank you Ms Parkes for sharing your purls and some of the fabric of your life.

[Barbara · Rating 5 out of 5]

Clara Parkes writes wonderful essays that manage to connect facets of knitting to all sorts of things including baked goods. She is careful with her analogies so that they never seem outlandish. Her descriptions of her life and family have just enough detail to engage us, but never slide into self indulgence. A lover of Maine, and the ocean, I relished in the tastes of Maine life sprinkled throughout the book, and where she lives. I was surprised to learn she is somewhat a late bloomer in the knitting world though she had knitting grandmothers who probably account for some genetic predisposition to fiber and knitting. A wonderful must-read for all knitters.

[Mary · Rating 2 out of 5]

Too 'clever' for its own good. It takes a reflective tone and tries very hard to relate life philosophically to knitting, which is something I'm sure all knitters have pondered while journeying through an endless project or learning something new the hard way.

Perhaps my lack of loving it is due to my Aussie preference for self-deprecating light-heartedness as opposed to reflective distillations of someone else's 'wisdom'.

I had intentions of trying to finish it (I got about half way through) but it is due back at the library, and I doubt I'll go back to it.

[Miz Lizzie · Rating 5 out of 5]

Though she does sprinkle some personal and family history into her pieces, this is really more of a collection of essays than a memoir. Clara Parkes has followed her bliss by turning her life over to yarn. Yarn and knitting become rich metaphors for contemplating her life experiences, making me think of a dream I had in which the composition of all the man-made creations in the environment around me transformed into knitted fabric. A lovely book, especially for knitters, that provides a deeper raison d'etre for pursuing the craft than mere product completion. Kind of a zen of knitting book.

Book Pairings: Turns out I have Clara Parkes A Knitter's Book of Yarn in my knitting reference collection; a great resource that is made more meaningful paired with the insights provided by this book.
Sheepish by Catherine Friend is another life in fiber, this one more of a memoir, that would pair nicely with this one.
I am also reminded of Extra Yarn by Mac Barnett, a children's picture book that won illustrator Jon Klassen a 2013 Caldecott Honor, for the lovely symbolism with yarn and knitting.

[Kate · Rating 4 out of 5]

I won an advance copy of this through GR. In general I'm not a fan of short stories or essays because I feel like they always leave me wanting more. This is different. It feels conversational, like chatting with an old friend over coffee. It's comforting. And I keep finding snippets of myself in it! My only criticism is that I feel like it's more about life than yarn and knitting, and it's a shame that some might dismiss it as stories about needlework. I know a couple of non-knitters on my list who will be getting copies.

[Natasha · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book is a must read if you are a knitter who also loves reading family history. In each essay, the author picks one aspect of knitting- the yarn, the stitches, the techniques- and uses that to talk about her family and her one journey as a queer person who gives up a conventional job to work with yarn.
You may not walk away with grand insights, but you would certainly be a happier and calmer person by the time you finish. The book also introduces me to a new way to cast on which I am already in love with.

[Lori · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was an enjoyable little read. I got it as a Christmas gift from my son and his family which made it even more special. My daughter in law googled top
Christmas gifts for knitters. Clara compares knitting experiences to her real life experiences in a very clever way. The book was warm and fuzzy. Pun intended. She likes puns!

[Andrea · Rating 3 out of 5]

I liked the essays in this book, but I didn’t love them. There wasn’t a strong enough theme running through to bind them all together to push it up into the love it territory.

As usual, interesting, educated pieces that relate to knitting and daily life. Clara’s prose is very readable. And she draws interesting connections between things.

[Rachel Cunningham · Rating 5 out of 5]

If you wanted knitting philosophical metaphors and musings about how life is like knitting, this group of essays is for you!!!

My favorite quote was when Parkes is discussing knitting for others: "like, the entire reputation of knitting is on the line." which I have absolutely felt because if I gift something that's bad, people will think "oh knit hats are terrible" or whatever.

[Deserthomemaker · Rating 4 out of 5]

I enjoyed this one. Reading Ms. Parks essays about her life is a bit like settling in with that friend who tells a good story. The comparison of knitting to life sometimes works better than others, but is overall pretty well done.

[Lani · Rating 3 out of 5]

I prefer her books that are more narrowly focused. These essays felt very formulaic, it definitely feels like some blog posts turned into chapters. Her other books where she investigates topics and tells a more narrative story are fantastic.

[Michele Kinsey Gross · Rating 5 out of 5]

A sweet and gentle book that is beautifully written and would appeal to all lovers of yarn and needlecrafts. A little piece of heaven to calm the soul.

[Jenny Preston · Rating 3 out of 5]

A memoir in essay form, Parkes relates various memories and parts of life to elements of fiber arts (mostly knitting but not entirely). Some essays are stronger than others. I dipped in and out of this book for 4 months between other reads.

[Hale Yaman · Rating 4 out of 5]

3.5 ⭐️

[Cym · Rating 3 out of 5]

Short essays about how life is like knitting. Easy light read. Memoir

[Poppy · Rating 2 out of 5]

So disappointing, and I just couldn’t justify spending more time reading a book that annoyed me with its mediocrity/badness. I like Clara Parkes (so I rounded up to 2 stars), but this is just not good.

[Peter Davis · Rating 5 out of 5]

I devoured this book in an afternoon, it was the perfect summer read. The author is funny, insightful and has a great way of connecting knitting with life experience. I will definitely be reading more by her.

[Ingrid · Rating 1 out of 5]

The writing style throughout this book is one that would work well with technical volumes, but not here. Using metaphor to create examples of how yarn and everyday life relate, fine, but it's not necessary to use that mechanism with every idea. I found the story ideas compelling, but Parkes kept hitting the the reader over the head with correlations to knitting. I read and enjoy memoir, biography, travel writing, etc., and am very familiar with those genres as well as variations on knitting books. I found this book a chore to read. Other reviews suggest that this book is best read leisurely, one story at a time and not all through as one might read a novel, but I did not enjoy the book either way.



A review of the physical book itself:

The size and sharpness of the book's font made it incredibly difficult for me to read this book. I have very good small detail vision, and perhaps the crisp serifs of Sentinel and Bryant offered up too much visual stimulation. The pages themselves are a thick, deckle-edged paper that's blindingly white, adding to my difficulty. The margins are quite large. If the publisher had decided to dedicate more of the page to the text, enlarge the image of the text portion, as it were, I wouldn't have had so much trouble.

It funny that the image on the book jacket of a book wrapped in yarn, is almost but not quite *this* book, sans jacket.

I love well made books but I find the choices here detrimental to my enjoyment.

[Leanne Hunt · Rating 4 out of 5]

For a lover of yarn and someone who has knitted for many years like me, this short book is a cosy reminder of the myriad life lessons one can take from one’s craft. Knitting is the art of making strong, functional fabric from a single thread, which reminds us that, as complicated as the future may seem right now, it can only be approached in a linear fashion, one stitch at a time. As long as we continue adding stitches, the future will manifest itself. And if we have to frog a whole section because a pattern didn’t work out, we still have the thread with which to try again. I enjoyed the comfortable, meandering style of the book and will certainly look out for another collection from this author.

[Nathan Williams · Rating 5 out of 5]

A fantastic read. I love how methodically Clara associates observations and events from of her life into the fabric of knitting. She succinctly created prose from all of the philosophical bits and pieces that a knitter can pick up as they develop their craft... if only they chose to read between the rows to see them.

[Glynn · Rating 2 out of 5]

I guess I don't think knitting is much like baking or gardening. It seems a little forced to see it as a simile or metaphor for so many things.....Maybe Clara Parkes' mind just wanders in a different way from mine.

I'm interested in what keeps people knitting. Sometimes it helps a person to live as they choose.

[Cameron Toney · Rating 2 out of 5]

I love Clara Parkes blog, which has tons of wonderful information about yarn, knitting tools, and a passion for knitting and all its accessories.
But this book just never quite jells, in my humble opinion. I like the idea of a memoir told through knitting, but the knitting metaphors never really work.
Ah well.

[Suzanne Loving · Rating 2 out of 5]

I found the stories of life fascinating, but not when twisted to fit a knitting motif. the connections between craft and life were tortured into being. I found myself yelling aloud at the book, and rolling my eyes on occasion. I did finish it, but a good editor could have helped this book be so much more.