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Crystal Clean: A mother's struggle with meth addiction and recovery
"There are precious few things in this life of which I am certain. One is the love I have for my son, Andy... The other thing of which I am certain is this: no one wants to be an addict." - from the book. Here's what readers have to say: "Kim's writing style is clear, lucid, revealing, and on a par with the best of skilled non-fiction authors - Thor Heyerdahl, Thomas Thompson, even James Michener or my favorite, Jan de Hartog, and she is able to make the reader relive her addictions - all of them - to the point that I HAD to put the book down several times and "de-tox" myself, or at least breathe normally, before I could return to it. I've never felt so much inside the skin of someone who is going through the horror of addiction as when reading this biography." "Kim has cleansed her soul by once again facing the demons of her past, and I can only imagine how much strength it took for her to reopen her wounds and recount them one by one." "Crystal Clean is a book I couldn't put down about an amazing woman who was once completely immersed in the world of crystal meth. If you didn't know that she made it through the other side (because she is telling her own story), you might not believe she will come out of it alive. Kim lays out her life story, with memories that help show her state of mind as she started using different drugs and then meth. But it's not a "woe is me" story, and she doesn't dwell on the bad things that contributed to her mental state. It is ultimately a story about how a mother's love can overcome the terrible odds associated with this addiction." "This is a well-written, entertaining book. The author's style is light even when when the subject is not. It would have been easy to simply write about the misery that must come with Meth addiction. Instead, the author gives insight into her background and motivations. You can't help but root for the author as she describes her descent into drug addiction "hell," even though she is responsible for all her choices." "Being a mom of a special needs son (only child) and struggling to be everything to that child, while barely hanging on yourself is such a familiar story to me." "While reading this book, it hit home so much I had to stop reading it for moments at a time. So real and writing was so descriptive, I had to separate her feelings from my own in some regard. Thank you for opening up to your readers and trusting us with your story. I picture you kind of like a female "Rocky" winning in the end. Can't help but root for you and Andy!" "What an insightful and bravely written book. What Kim has shared is an amazingly helpful understanding to anyone who has been touched by the outreaching fingers of meth addiction and mental illness. And to those who haven't, a good reminder that not everyone or everything is as it may seem." "A beautiful memoir about one mom's struggle with her lot in life and how she chose to deal with it using illegal drugs. It's told in a brave, clear manner with no careful wording. I loved reading more about Andy and was absolutely rooting for Wollenburg through it all." "At first, you don't understand Kim. Then you love her." "Kim illustrates with graphic detail and genuine emotion the pain of addiction as well as the sometimes circuitous path to recovery. This book is extremely well written. I wish I lived next door to this courageous mother, daughter, and woman of worth." "CRYSTAL CLEAN: A mother's struggle with meth addiction and recovery is an honest and transparent look at the world of meth addiction and recovery. As a reader, I was swallowed up into this world of addiction, pain, anger, and fear. Many times I wanted out -- I wanted to skip to the end of the book and be assured that this young woman was going to be okay. I applaud the author for her obvious courage in sharing her story and exposing her pain and allowing herself to be so vulnerable. The author's writing is superb -- strong imagery and an authentic voice. "
268 pages, Paperback
First published August 26, 2012
101 people are currently reading
701 people want to read
About the author
Kimberly Wollenburg
1 book12 followersAuthor of the best selling memoir, CRYSTAL CLEAN, found here: http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00AN7O2UY Kim is the single mother of Andy, a 22 year old who has Down syndrome. (also known as her Bug in a Boy Suit, a perfect person, and the best human she's ever known.)
Kim turned her life around after years of meth addiction. Unable to find a job after a felony drug conviction, she started her own business, Kimbo's Cookies, where she bakes and designs custom cookies. You can find her beautiful cookies on Face Book and at http://www.kimboscookies.com
Kim loves spending time with her family, deep water aerobics, movies, and books. CRYSTAL CLEAN is her first book.
Kim turned her life around after years of meth addiction. Unable to find a job after a felony drug conviction, she started her own business, Kimbo's Cookies, where she bakes and designs custom cookies. You can find her beautiful cookies on Face Book and at http://www.kimboscookies.com
Kim loves spending time with her family, deep water aerobics, movies, and books. CRYSTAL CLEAN is her first book.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 34 reviews
March 18, 2013
I started reading this book because I am a newly recovering meth addict. I needed to hear someone else's story, read where the odds of staying clean were overcome. Kimberly wrote this book stating the facts of her life.. Showing it as it was.. And how out of control being a meth addict can be. Her sobriety was hard won and her epiphanies about why she used were like looking into my own soul. Kudos to her for overcoming the meth monster and making her world and life a better place. This book gave me hope.
September 8, 2022
Wow that was a journey! I love how she ended the book on HOW she got clean, I relate to that and being a Mom and wow! Good read! Sometimes we have to bang our heads against the wall repeating the same thing (insanity) till one day we can see! It’s so obvious too when u look back but in it, so blind.. I feel even now after being clean for awhile (years) it’s like I’m in Kindergarden again learning how to make friends! Glad I read this and even happier that Kimberly shared her story!
February 1, 2016
I have read a fair number of drug memoirs and this is one of the better ones.
Kimberly Wollenburg could be any one of us, essentially. She is not the person you would think would become a meth addict. We all know what meth addicts look and behave like – they live in gutters hook for money and have ravaged faces with no teeth. Kim was none of these things all while she was developing and maintaining a huge meth addiction. She worked (mostly selling drugs but still, she worked), looked after her son with Downs Syndrome (except when she went right off the rails), lived in a big lovely house, had no debt and even had all her own teeth.
That was a large contributor to her problem (not her teeth, the whole not looking like a meth head). She didn’t recognise her problem until it was almost too late. She knew what meth heads looked and behaved like and that wasn’t her, so obviously she wasn’t an addict.
Only she so was.
In this very honest and very readable account of Kim’s addict and eventual decision to sort her shit out, as a reader, even if you have never taken drugs, you understand her lack of understanding. And I believe you understand how she landed up where she was. Kim reveals some of her childhood to us, but, I believe, because part of the process of getting sober is taking on the responsibility for her decisions, she doesn’t lay blame at what did or did not happen to her. For the voyeur reading this is a bit exasperating; nothing better than a good bitch session about one’s mother/classmates/boyfriends/friends/imaginary people. But Kim does the right thing; she owns her addiction and so is finally able to escape it.
It’s a worthwhile book to read and maybe it will help just one addict get a little more understanding from others. Because we are horrible to addicts, generally speaking, blaming them for what no longer is their choice.
And now Kim lives in a flat, looks after her boy in a bug suit and makes cookies. I wish I lived in Boise so I could support her.
Kimberly Wollenburg could be any one of us, essentially. She is not the person you would think would become a meth addict. We all know what meth addicts look and behave like – they live in gutters hook for money and have ravaged faces with no teeth. Kim was none of these things all while she was developing and maintaining a huge meth addiction. She worked (mostly selling drugs but still, she worked), looked after her son with Downs Syndrome (except when she went right off the rails), lived in a big lovely house, had no debt and even had all her own teeth.
That was a large contributor to her problem (not her teeth, the whole not looking like a meth head). She didn’t recognise her problem until it was almost too late. She knew what meth heads looked and behaved like and that wasn’t her, so obviously she wasn’t an addict.
Only she so was.
In this very honest and very readable account of Kim’s addict and eventual decision to sort her shit out, as a reader, even if you have never taken drugs, you understand her lack of understanding. And I believe you understand how she landed up where she was. Kim reveals some of her childhood to us, but, I believe, because part of the process of getting sober is taking on the responsibility for her decisions, she doesn’t lay blame at what did or did not happen to her. For the voyeur reading this is a bit exasperating; nothing better than a good bitch session about one’s mother/classmates/boyfriends/friends/imaginary people. But Kim does the right thing; she owns her addiction and so is finally able to escape it.
It’s a worthwhile book to read and maybe it will help just one addict get a little more understanding from others. Because we are horrible to addicts, generally speaking, blaming them for what no longer is their choice.
And now Kim lives in a flat, looks after her boy in a bug suit and makes cookies. I wish I lived in Boise so I could support her.
October 12, 2017
A mother's love is strong, hate for prison is stronger
Definitely recommend this book to anyone who is, has or probably going to struggle with addiction. Only for people who have children, since the bond described in this book is only understood by those of us parents.
Definitely recommend this book to anyone who is, has or probably going to struggle with addiction. Only for people who have children, since the bond described in this book is only understood by those of us parents.
April 8, 2020
Tugged at the heartstrings
This is a real eye opener of a story. The struggle to stay clean and provide an adequate lifestyle for her autistic son leaves Kimberly struggling with who she is as a person and trying to hide her addiction. My heart ached as I read this book and I was thrilled at how it ended.
This is a real eye opener of a story. The struggle to stay clean and provide an adequate lifestyle for her autistic son leaves Kimberly struggling with who she is as a person and trying to hide her addiction. My heart ached as I read this book and I was thrilled at how it ended.
April 28, 2019
This book was amazing and insightful .
Kim tells it how it is and her Story is relatable and honest. I couldn't stop turning page after page and by the end of the book I was sad it was over . By far the most genuine account of addiction I have ever come across READ BUY IT DISPLAY ON SHELF AND PASS IT TO SOME ONE WHO MAY BE IN NEED OF A REMINDER OF WHAT IT IS TO RECOVER
Kim tells it how it is and her Story is relatable and honest. I couldn't stop turning page after page and by the end of the book I was sad it was over . By far the most genuine account of addiction I have ever come across READ BUY IT DISPLAY ON SHELF AND PASS IT TO SOME ONE WHO MAY BE IN NEED OF A REMINDER OF WHAT IT IS TO RECOVER
October 14, 2017
THE best addiction memoir I've read!
I gave this book the highest rating because the writer told a narrative and held nothing back. If you want to really know how it feels from inside the mind of an addict, read this book! Kim wollenberg's writing is excellent, too.
I gave this book the highest rating because the writer told a narrative and held nothing back. If you want to really know how it feels from inside the mind of an addict, read this book! Kim wollenberg's writing is excellent, too.
July 6, 2015
Very good story
I enjoyed this story and that the author writes as if this is her own life experience. She won the battle after hitting rock bottom with help from her family.
I enjoyed this story and that the author writes as if this is her own life experience. She won the battle after hitting rock bottom with help from her family.
July 23, 2020
This was quite a story.
I feel for the author, although I cannot completely understand what she went through, I can say I do have a very thorough understanding of addiction and the recovery process as I am living it, albeit with a different drug of choice.
This is well written and I wish the author and her son nothing but the best in the future.
I am certain this was very difficult to re-live for the sake of a book. This I am also all to familiar with.
There comes an inner sort of peace from writing a memoir of our most vulnerable selves, it hurts- deeply, yet it also has the power to heal.
I feel for the author, although I cannot completely understand what she went through, I can say I do have a very thorough understanding of addiction and the recovery process as I am living it, albeit with a different drug of choice.
This is well written and I wish the author and her son nothing but the best in the future.
I am certain this was very difficult to re-live for the sake of a book. This I am also all to familiar with.
There comes an inner sort of peace from writing a memoir of our most vulnerable selves, it hurts- deeply, yet it also has the power to heal.
September 22, 2018
Honest
The best part for me, was reading how much time it took for Kim to break through her denial that she actually had an addiction.
The best part for me, was reading how much time it took for Kim to break through her denial that she actually had an addiction.
March 14, 2020
Best book I ever read. She put into words, what I could find the words to describe. She could have literally almost written the story of my life! I am amazed left in awe!
June 9, 2021
CASA book club read. Just okay for me. It did provide me with a better understanding of the way meth works on the brain, it only takes one try to become obsessed with the drug.
June 20, 2022
A poignant and memorable memoir about meth addiction.
September 7, 2012
Imagine someone you think you know turning to you one day and saying, "This is me."
The next thing you know, she sticks a knife in her belly, rips up as far as she can, and then hands you her entrails.
"Crystal Clean" has this impact on a reader. It is gut-wrenching, soul-baring intensity from beginning to end. But this is not a "poor-me" story, even though Kim details how she hit bottom not once, but several times. It's her way of letting us know that "this" is no longer "me" - it's what she was in spite of being in denial most of the time. And what she was isn't pretty.
Kim's writing style is clear, lucid, revealing, and on a par with the best of skilled non-fiction authors - Thor Heyerdahl, Thomas Thompson, even James Michener or my favorite, Jan de Hartog, and she is able to make the reader relive her addictions - all of them - to the point that I HAD to put the book down several times and "de-tox" myself, or at least breathe normally, before I could return to it. I've never felt so much inside the skin of someone who is going through the horror of addiction as when reading this biography.
Kim has cleansed her soul by once again facing the demons of her past, and I can only imagine how much strength it took for her to reopen her wounds and recount them one by one. I couldn't do it.
The next thing you know, she sticks a knife in her belly, rips up as far as she can, and then hands you her entrails.
"Crystal Clean" has this impact on a reader. It is gut-wrenching, soul-baring intensity from beginning to end. But this is not a "poor-me" story, even though Kim details how she hit bottom not once, but several times. It's her way of letting us know that "this" is no longer "me" - it's what she was in spite of being in denial most of the time. And what she was isn't pretty.
Kim's writing style is clear, lucid, revealing, and on a par with the best of skilled non-fiction authors - Thor Heyerdahl, Thomas Thompson, even James Michener or my favorite, Jan de Hartog, and she is able to make the reader relive her addictions - all of them - to the point that I HAD to put the book down several times and "de-tox" myself, or at least breathe normally, before I could return to it. I've never felt so much inside the skin of someone who is going through the horror of addiction as when reading this biography.
Kim has cleansed her soul by once again facing the demons of her past, and I can only imagine how much strength it took for her to reopen her wounds and recount them one by one. I couldn't do it.
October 4, 2012
When you think of someone with a drug addiction, what do you think of? Is the image of your mind a young, pale, stringy-haired man or woman who steals from his/her friends and family? Someone who is clearly desperate? Perhaps someone living in a housing project or a roach motel?
What about a middle-aged single parent, who is raising a son with Down Syndrome, who spent several years also looking after other children as a foster parent, who owns her home and has a job and would never steal from anyone, even if they stole from her first?
Kim Wollenberg began using crystal meth as a temporary way to give her the energy and focus she needed to finish her own college classes and also do all the things she needed to do to care for her son. But she found that meth helped her feel so much better, it seemed to "fix" her, and she started using more and more, until she could no longer leave the house without getting high.
In her memoir, Kim bravely relives the progression of her addiction, from the point where she uses it to help her out a little with her life, to the point where it BECOMES her life.
For those who enjoy memoirs, this is a great one! I enjoyed getting to know Kim, feeling sympathetic at some points and at other points feeling frustrated at her actions. This is definitely a book I am glad I read.
What about a middle-aged single parent, who is raising a son with Down Syndrome, who spent several years also looking after other children as a foster parent, who owns her home and has a job and would never steal from anyone, even if they stole from her first?
Kim Wollenberg began using crystal meth as a temporary way to give her the energy and focus she needed to finish her own college classes and also do all the things she needed to do to care for her son. But she found that meth helped her feel so much better, it seemed to "fix" her, and she started using more and more, until she could no longer leave the house without getting high.
In her memoir, Kim bravely relives the progression of her addiction, from the point where she uses it to help her out a little with her life, to the point where it BECOMES her life.
For those who enjoy memoirs, this is a great one! I enjoyed getting to know Kim, feeling sympathetic at some points and at other points feeling frustrated at her actions. This is definitely a book I am glad I read.
February 20, 2017
Kim is not a stupid woman. She is not a product of a severely abusive childhood. Kim is the girl next door or your daughter's BFF. It's impossible to discern, looking at this unpresupposing person, that she is a hard-core meth addict, a drug dealer of some stature, and a financial force to be reckoned with. Kim unfolds the story of her addiction as it gradually escalates into the active drug under-world of Idaho, introducing us to each successively, flawed character with unerring descriptions in graphic detail. Is it possible to hold a love interest based on the love of drugs rather than each other? Can you actually survive a highly elevated tolerance for such a devastatingly pervasive drug and still triumph in a new life? "Crystal Clean" will have you on the edge; you must know if she can pull it off--one more time.
August 19, 2013
Hollywood portraits drug dealing and use as a miserable road to follow. Ms. Wollenburg shows just how miserable it is. As her drug habit deepens so does her ingenuity! Taking the reader from a casual user to a desperate addict happens quickly. Add a good business acumen to the mix and you become mesmerized by the skill Kimbo employs. Dodging the law and staying in business is only part of the problem. Male losers seem to gravitate to this type of women. Needing affirmation Kimbo puts up with whatever the guy hands out as long as it appears she is appreciated. Finally the pressure of the situation makes the realization of needing to quit enormous. Kim quits and in doing so adds flavor to a very difficult topic. This read is engrossing and hard to drop. I recommend it highly!
February 5, 2013
How does a suburban mother who does meth everyday and sells it for a living convince herself she's not an addict? That's what I asked myself as I read this memoir. How did her friends and family live in denial with her for so long? For five years she loved the life meth afforded her. Then it all fell apart and recovery seemed elusive. She really didn't even want to give up the meth after losing everything. She is lucky to be alive and even luckier that she has the mental facilities to write such an engaging book.
July 28, 2015
Finally Surrender
This is an entertaining book of first person experiences of falling slowly but deeply into the dark prison of addiction and dealing. By then, it seemed normal and rational to continue the chaos. Being a single mother of a Downs syndrome isn't easy but she made it appear so, as if she were Wonder Mom. She cared too much for what others thought of her, so she lived a lie. She was a little girl who needed to be loved. Once she stopped her self loathing, she was free. Kudos for her honesty and goodness. I am proud of Kimbo.
This is an entertaining book of first person experiences of falling slowly but deeply into the dark prison of addiction and dealing. By then, it seemed normal and rational to continue the chaos. Being a single mother of a Downs syndrome isn't easy but she made it appear so, as if she were Wonder Mom. She cared too much for what others thought of her, so she lived a lie. She was a little girl who needed to be loved. Once she stopped her self loathing, she was free. Kudos for her honesty and goodness. I am proud of Kimbo.
February 12, 2013
Wonderfully written biography of a woman's development of meth addiction. The honesty with which the author shares where addiction led her can only be told from the side of recovery. I am surprised a major publisher or Hazelden has not picked up this book. If you are a person who is recovering, in need of recovery or the family of an addicted person, I recommend this book so that you may see the world through the addicts eyes.
July 6, 2013
This book was...well, 'addicting.' I couldn't put it down. The author's voice and writing style were so believable and engaging. Whatever else she may be, it is obvious she has a gift for storytelling. I wish her all the best; and, thank her for such a good read. One caveat - naturally, this book is not for the faint of heart...the language and subject matter can be raunchy and overpowering.
March 5, 2015
Inspiring
I liked that Kimberly was so honest about her feelings, about her struggles to stay sober. I admired her determination to get her mental illness treated. This book would be especially good for those struggling with mental illness that wounds up with an addiction on top of that. There is not enough focus on mental illness
I liked that Kimberly was so honest about her feelings, about her struggles to stay sober. I admired her determination to get her mental illness treated. This book would be especially good for those struggling with mental illness that wounds up with an addiction on top of that. There is not enough focus on mental illness
December 27, 2013
I couldn't put this book down
it's about a mother's struggle with being a mom, addict and drug dealer and her ride through addiction and recovery. the story keeps you interested the whole way through. definitely worth reading
it's about a mother's struggle with being a mom, addict and drug dealer and her ride through addiction and recovery. the story keeps you interested the whole way through. definitely worth reading
February 13, 2013
I am glad you wrote this book to explain to others what you went through with your addiction. I wish the best to you and your son!
March 1, 2013
Touching, inspiring, sad, funny... This book has it all. You know from the title it has a happy ending which I like.
March 22, 2013
Couldn't put this book down. Very well written and an unbelievable story.
June 8, 2013
An excellently written first hand account of addiction and recovery. A must read for anyone who has ever tried to love and understand someone with an addiction. She is honest and heartfelt.
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January 2, 2014Interesting Read
Very interesting book about a mom who is also a meth addict and somewhat of a selling kingpin. Relatable and real, a page turner throughout most of the story.
Very interesting book about a mom who is also a meth addict and somewhat of a selling kingpin. Relatable and real, a page turner throughout most of the story.
March 3, 2014
Painfully delicious.
Brutally honest recollection of how casual drug use spiraled out of control. Evokes strong feelings and emotions, so buyer beware.
Brutally honest recollection of how casual drug use spiraled out of control. Evokes strong feelings and emotions, so buyer beware.
July 31, 2014
What a poignant, emotional, and seemingly honest story of a pretty amazing woman. I will likely re-read.
Displaying 1 - 30 of 34 reviews