Hollywood Said No!: Orphaned Film Scripts, Bastard Scenes, and Abandoned Darlings from the Creators of Mr. Show

by Bob Odenkirk, David Cross, Brian Posehn (With)

Mr. Show fans rejoice! After all these years, Bob and David are finally back together with a collection of hilarious, never-before-seen scripts, sketches, and ideas that may have just been too good for Hollywood.




Bob Odenkirk and David Cross, creators of HBO's classic sketch comedy show Mr. Show, present to you this collection of never-before-seen scripts and ideas that Hollywood couldn't find the gumption to green-light. Simply put... Hollywood Said No! Since Mr. Show closed up shop, Bob and David have kept busy with many projects--acting in fun, successful, movies and TV shows, directing things, and complaining about stuff that didn't turn out well to anyone who would listen, and even alone, in silence, inside their own heads. Hollywood Said No! reveals the full-length, never-before-seen scripts for Bob and David Make a Movie (fleshed out with brand-new storyboards by acclaimed artist Mike Mitchell) and Hooray For America! : a satirical power-house indictment of all that you hold dear. This tome also includes a bonus section of orphaned sketch ideas from the Mr. Show days and beyond, suitable for performance by church groups that aren't all koo-koo about religion. What you are looking at online, and are about to buy, is chock-full of comic twists, turns, and maybe a few hard truths. We said "maybe," but what we mean was "probably not." Now, for the first time, take a peek at the scripts that didn't get the go-ahead and ponder a world we can only dream about...and beyond!

Genres: Humor, Audiobook, Comedy, Fiction, Film, Comedian, Tv

274 pages, Paperback

First published September 10, 2013

About the author

Robert John "Bob" Odenkirk (born October 22, 1962) is an American actor, comedian, writer, director, and producer. He is best known for being the co-creator and co-star of the HBO sketch comedy series Mr. Show with Bob and David and for his role as criminal lawyer Saul Goodman on the AMC crime drama series Breaking Bad and its spin-off series Better Call Saul.

In the 1980s and 1990s, Odenkirk worked as a writer for such television shows as Saturday Night Live, Get a Life, The Ben Stiller Show and The Dennis Miller Show. In the mid-1990s, Odenkirk and David Cross created the Emmy-nominated sketch comedy program Mr. Show with Bob and David, which ran for four seasons and ultimately became a cult success.

He has directed three films: Melvin Goes to Dinner (2003), Let's Go to Prison (2006) and The Brothers Solomon (2007).

Reviews

[Erica Zimmermann · Rating 3 out of 5]

In all honesty, there's a reason Hollywood said no to these scripts, but if you love these comedians as much as I do, the audio book is worth a listen. They even bring back some of the writing staff for voice-over (Scott Aukerman, Brian Posehn, and Paul F. Tompkins among others). There are a few times when the narrator will get hung up on a nonsensical portion of the script and the group will start laughing, so I'm guessing they did this as a sort of table-read. I wish there had been more of those moments, or maybe some commentary, as the introduction was the most entertaining part of the entire thing.

I don't feel duped, my expectations were probably just too high due to the immense talent I know these guys have.

[Josh · Rating 2 out of 5]

These scripts seemed really lazy to me, and kept me wondering, "are these just that bad? Are Bob & David just such endearing performers that they would've carried these? Maybe they improvise a lot in all their sketches? Am I maybe not the Mr. show fan I thought I was?"

It was a roller coaster of existential crises, but rarely did I laugh. Maybe I'm just a shitty Hollywood type. Either way, I would've preferred an annotated version, with more thoughts and insights. But maybe that's another book entirely.

[Nathan Dehoff · Rating 5 out of 5]

Most of the content of this book is made up of two Mr. Show movie scripts that never went anywhere. Bob and David Make a Movie has the same basic structure as a Mr. Show episode, with the main plot segueing into various sketches, including a send-up of jam bands and a bit poking fun at guys who think strippers are actually interested in them. It's a movie ABOUT making a movie, and doing so in a very absurd manner. Hooray for America!, which was actually written first, satirizes corporate control of politics with a plot in which the Globo-Chem Corporation has David elected president as a convenient dupe to distract from their plan to construct an exclusive new planet by digging the ground out from under much of the world. You may recall that their 2002 tour used this same premise, although they took out a fair amount of the plot to work in both new and classic sketches. Apparently they didn't want this to be their first movie because it was too inside and relied too much on people knowing who Bob and David were. The actual film they DID make, Run Ronnie Run, turned out to be a flop. Beth actually owns a copy, but we haven't gotten around to watching it yet. Unfortunately, its failure probably means it isn't at all likely for another Mr. Show movie anytime soon. Anyway, if you like Mr. Show, you'll probably like the book. The audio book might well be even better, but I can't say I've heard it.

[Leah Angstman]

DNF. I could not get into this book. I loved Mr. Show, but this book did not live up to that level at all, and it's just not my type of humor. This is one for the super-superfans, who I'm sure will get a kick out of it, but it wasn't for me.

[Brad · Rating 4 out of 5]

Listened to the audiobook version. Full cast, music, sound effects. Some of the stuff wasn't super great but overall a must listen for any Mr Show fan.

[Matt Daneman · Rating 4 out of 5]

A big Mr. Show fan, I overall enjoyed the book at a three-star level, but a couple of really inspired jokes and ideas elevated it .

[Justin Nova · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.5 audio version

Some really funny stuff and some just silly. Kept me entertained while listening at work.

[Philippa Dowding · Rating 4 out of 5]

Okay, so I'm suddenly finding myself immersed in all things Bob Odenkirk these days. It seems I've been drawn into fannery of Better Call Saul (AMC), a spinoff based on Odenkirk's lawyer character in Breaking Bad. Full disclosure here: BBad wasn't my favourite show although I dipped in here and there, and the last time I can say I was a fan of anything TV-related was Keifer Sutherland as Jack Bauer in the 90s. But it's been a long winter, and I've been fascinated with Odenkirk's depiction of Jimmy McGill, a lawyer clinging to the slippery window ledge of the moral high ground. He's got his nose pushed up against the window watching the big wig lawyers from afar, but we know he's always gonna be on the outside looking in as he slowly slides into the dark underbelly of criminal law.
It makes good TV, it's fun to watch because it's great writing, but also because Odenkirk has an irresistible, weird nervous energy and a trademark Illinois gravel-lot voice. I've been watching his Mr. Show, a hilarious mid-90s sketch comedy originally on HBO, with David Cross (Tobias on Arrested Development) on Youtube with delight and as a writer, I've been happily reading through his books. Guy's a writer too, who knew?
This is the first one I finished; it has two movie scripts (Bob and David Make a Movie, and Hooray for America) and some "abandoned darling" sketch ideas. Lots of fart jokes, friends, as you'd expect I guess. Not sure I'd watch either one if they were actually made into a movie, but I enjoyed reading the explanations for what the actors were doing and thinking at the time they wrote the scripts. Odenkirk and Cross are talented guys, who I guess are a little jaded, a little seasoned, old enough now to tell it like it kinda might actually be in Hollywood for middle-aged actors who suddenly find themselves superstars in their 50s (and so maybe better able to handle it, more grateful and humble?) For the record, the only other movie script I've got kicking around here is a very thumbed copy of Monty Python's Life of Brian. Got me through one winter in grad school. Maybe I'm regressing, but I'm going on to read Odenkirk's "A Load of Hooey" next, which I actually bought!
EDITORIAL INSERT: Here's my review of A Load of Hooey https://www.goodreads.com/review/show...
Yes! I think if you're interested in the unlikelihood of a Hollywood actor like Odenkirk who gets a second life and is swept to superstardom long after he probably ever figured it would happen, you might like reading this. And if you're a fan of Mr. Show, Odenkirk, Cross or underdogs and unlikely long shots in general, go for it. It's a gentle surprise to see an older actor grind it out over the course of a career, and finally succeed spectacularly; that's gotta be someone's Hollywood dream, and hey, it might even make a good movie!

[Yuck Yucky · Rating 3 out of 5]

Firstly, I ordered this used from Amazon and was pleasantly surprised to see that it was one of the signed copies! Very very cool. Anyways, there’s a reason these scripts didn’t get made. They aren’t the crop’s cream, but they’re delightful and refreshing for hungry fans. Regardless of how convoluted and weird some of this stuff is, I would sell a toe to have seen Hooray for America live on stage. Even when these guys miss, it’s still a hit.

[Ollie · Rating 5 out of 5]

Sometimes the line between content and bonus feature gets blurred a bit. For having such a short run, Mr. Show is arguably the greatest comedy sketch show there ever was. It was funny, edgy and smart, and lucky for us, the DVDs will always be there for us to watch. The cast is so funny that even the audio commentary on all the episodes can stand on its own.

It’s been eighteen years now since Mr. Show ran its course, but now we've blessed with reunion of the cast – after a fashion. David Cross, Bob Odenkirk, and Brian Posehn are on the road doing sketches, standup, and promoting this book of scripts called “Hollywood Said No!” which, as the title says, has a bunch of scripts for movies and sketches which never got made.

And how does it hold up? Surprisingly well – especially if readers use their imaginations a bit. Here we have two movies, “Bob and David Make a Movie” and “Hooray for America,” in their entirety and after getting the hang of script-reading, one can imagine these scenes being performed as regular Mr. Show sketches (especially “Bob and David Make a Movie,” which plays like a long Mr. Show episode). And just like Mr. Show, the quality is there in almost every page. Both movies are filled with witty dialogue (Bob playing the almost-straight man in all their conversations), hilarious Mr. Show-esque situations and pacing, and deal with smart topics. The results are pretty fantastic, and one wonders why these movies never got picked up over the years. It’s the perfect companion for any fans of the show, or honestly, if you want to see how comedy can still be fresh and relevant. And it’s painful to read through the short sketches at the end since they are perfect for TV right now!

There’s no question – these idea and sketches are great. The only question now is, “Why isn’t there a Kickstarter for these scripts?”

[thewestchestarian · Rating 3 out of 5]

Hollywood Said No!: Maybe a Second Draft Would've Helped? Basically Bob Odenkirk, David Cross, Brian Posehn and others hung out, toked a little, and improvised in the presence of someone sober enough to record the outcome. Not enough narrative structure or plausible situations inhabit the "scripts" to make these actual viable movies or even a book for that matter. The comedy can best be described as silly rather than funny and despite the authors' claims to the they do not serve as a poor man's Monty Python if no other reason that the Pythoners edited and did second drafts. The book lives largely off its frantic pace which helps to distract the reader from the fact that the jokes ranks as mildly amusing or nominally original at best. Readers also get something of a contact high as feel the enjoyment the authors got out of coming up with a premise (the boys star in a Branson, Missouri production of a patriotic play) and then riff on it until they run out of steam (a global corporation has stolen all the dirt in the town to make a gated, for 1%ers only, planet). A lot of the ideas feel borrowed and many tacked on such as when the boys avoid being killed when the gated planet blows up because they created exact robotic duplicates of themselves (the fu?).

In short, for aficionados of unbridled comedic energy or deep fans of Mr. Show, might be worth a look.

[Michael Emond · Rating 3 out of 5]

A jaunty little book made up of two major motion picture scripts and three little skits written by THE David Cross, THE Bob Odenkirk, and a Brian Posehn. The question on everyone's mind is: Michael..DID...YOU...LIKE....IT? And I will answer that question with another question, "So what if I did?" So what if I did laugh out loud at several places and nod my head in pleasure at the cleverness of the scripts at several other (different) places. Is that a crime? Is that any reason for Dumb-old Trump to want to build a wall around me? Yes, they are screenplays so you have to use a fair bit of your imagination to envision what they would be like if they were brought to life on the screen. You have to make several casting choices yourself when it isn't specified in the script. Many of them on the fly, with no warning. And remember, Paul F. Tompkins can only play so many roles. He exhausts VERY easily. So while I wasn't thinking "how could Hollywood pass on these gems?" I was thinking "much better than Run Ronny Run (their movie that did get made) and if they had been made I would have wanted to see them". Overall I give the scripts two body parts (you get to chose) up.

[Ben Baker · Rating 4 out of 5]

Despite living in a country that has never shown a second of Mr Show, I had long heard of its amazingness by the time I got broadband in early 2004. One of the first things I downloaded were random Mr Show episodes from a peer to peer service that was probably slowly pumping my computer with more viruses than GloboChem but I didn't care and certainly wasn't disappointed with what I saw. Ten years on, the DVDs sit on my shelves in all their wrong country glory having been watched to within an inch of their shiny disc lives.

Thus the chance of me not enjoying this book, featuring two full Bob and David film scripts rejected by the American film studios and several extra sketches, also unseen was slimmer than an owl's cough. Of the two screenplays, "Hooray For America!" works best, being more complete a premise than the sketch format of "Bob And David Make A Movie", although there's a lot of fantastic stuff in there I'd love to see filmed at some point. And remember: I love you.

[Alex Yard · Rating 3 out of 5]

Until now I don't think I'd ever read a movie-length screenplay, and now I've read two! I am a big Mr. Show fan and so I dig their comic sensibility big time. This book contains two movies they wrote shortly after Mr. Show ended, which they were unable to get made, followed by some random sketches. The first one "Bob and David Make a Movie" was a movie-length series of sketches connected by the narrative thread of, well, Bob and David trying to write and make a movie. It had some good parts but I often find it hard to forgive when moviemakers can't think of any movie subject matter besides, moviemaking. They undercut their own confidence. The second movie script "Hooray for America" was more cohesive and directly satirical yet still had some quasi-non-sequiteurs. And after that the assorted sketches at the end were probably the funniest parts of the book.

[Tom · Rating 3 out of 5]

This is entertaining if you have watched Mr. Show with Bob and David but is probably not a good choice if you aren't already a fan.

These film and sketch drafts are really interesting in how while reading it, I clearly heard the voices of Bob Odenkirk and David Cross in my mind. It was really easy to envision everything.

That being said, I can understand why Hollywood said no, especially to "Bob and David Make a Movie." "Hooray for America!" seemed a lot more cohesive and worked better as a whole film. Also, despite being written in 1998 or so, it was all too relevant and topical. David's buffoonish corporate stooge of a candidate reminded me of Idiocracy (2006) and the Trump campaign. David even has the slogan, "Make This Country Great Again." Strange, terrifying times we live in.

[Bradley Morgan · Rating 3 out of 5]

Finished reading "Hollywood Said No" by Bob Odenkirk and David Cross (with help from Brian Posehn). After reading some really emotionally heavy books, I wanted to breeze through something that offered no redeemable value other than pure entertainment. And I got that with this! "Hollywood Said No" is a collection of un-produced scripts for "Mr. Show" that were written following the show's cancellation. It contains a few sketches as well two feature-length screenplays. The first being "Bob and David Make a Movie," a meta-story about the duo learning how to make a movie and "Hooray for America," a political satire where David is elected president as part of a scheme created by an evil conglomerate. It is an incredibly hilarious and (too) short collection. I highly recommend it.

[Chris Reeves · Rating 5 out of 5]

Funny, inventive and at times outrageous this is a book that has to be experienced in different formats to really get. If you are debating buying this book, let me tell you: skip the printed format, and go straight for the audiobook.

Acted out in radio script format, the majority of the cast of Mr. Show recreates skit roles, performances, wacky voices and insane setups for an often hilarious, dark journey through Bob Odenkirk and David Cross.

As the group rips through their scripts, they manage to kick up laughs, misreads and self criticism which is not present in the written form, and all of it significantly improves the experience.

[Terry Collins · Rating 4 out of 5]

The long "lost" Mr. Show unproduced movie scripts have been published, and while both of them are by no means perfect, they are still damned entertaining for fans of the show. I can't see reading and enjoying these without prior knowledge of Cross and Odenkirk's groundbreaking work in the four seasons of HBO's Mr. Show (and I'll state for the record that there hasn't been another sketch comedy that even comes close to what was going down during the days of that series). The directions in the scripts were often more amusing than the dialogue since I could easily picture Bob and David dancing or acting accordingly. Funny stuff ... and hey, Senator Tankerbell himself returns for a guest spot!

[Tucker · Rating 3 out of 5]

Mr. Show is one of my favorite tv shows of all time; I watch the entire series at least once a year. Hollywood Said No is two complete screenplays written by the creators - David Cross and Bob Odenkirk - that were never filmed. While either of these two films would probably have been better than the film that we did get - Run, Ronnie, Run - they now read like relics of the time they were written. The trademark Mr Show humor is there on the page, but it doesn't hold up the way the best episodes of the series do. Hardcore fans will enjoy this book, as I did; casual fans, not so much.

[Renata · Rating 4 out of 5]

I read other reviews that really encouraged the audiobook version of this, since it's read by Bob and David and other Mr. Show regulars (Brian Posehn, Paul F Tompkins, Scott Aukerman, etc). I can't compare to the print book, but I LOVED the audiobook. The material is a little rough and you can maybe understand why these didn't make it to film, but they're still really funny, and I enjoyed the behind-the-scenes feel of this.

I think basically if you liked Mr. Show you would like this, particularly the audiobook. If you did not like Mr. Show you probably have a bad sense of humor.

[Sarah · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is quite an enjoyable audiobook. Whenever I hear a recording with a full cast, I always wonder why these are so hard to find - I guess like radio dramas of old. The cast had a lot of enthusiasm about these poor abandoned scripts, that I couldn't help but fall in love with them, even though the premises were ridiculous and some of the humor was dumb. The laughter from the cast is infectious, and at only 3 discs long, makes for a short and sweet experience.

If you liked Mr. Show, you will like this too.

[Milan Žila · Rating 1 out of 5]

Hollywood said no and I wish I did too. Scripts for movies that would be barely funny 20 years ago. At first I was interested solely because of the voice of Saul Goodman but that quickly dissipated with all the unfunny scenes and jokes. He is definitely a better actor than writer.
The audiobook is well produced but the content is just plain boring. You can expect maybe one chuckle every 40 minutes. Everything else is just reading a script for a movie that would be at best a 3/10.
I don't recommend this for anyone :)

[Tiffany Day · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a must for any fan of Mr. Show - and I highly recommend you get the audio version. They've reunited much of the cast to perform the 2 movies (and a few additional sketches); it plays like satirical radio shows. Sure, it's easy to understand why these movies were never made - but it's a fun time, nonetheless. 4-star material, 5-star performance - rounding it up to the full five because it's such a brilliant use of the audiobook format.

[Jesse Stutzman · Rating 5 out of 5]

Normally I hate reading unproduced movie scripts, I just end up being pissed that they're not real movies I can look at with my eyeballs and listen to with my earballs. However, I will make an exception for Bob & David - I would probably happily read some shit those two wrote on napkins while high on molly (seriously, think of what Bob would be like on molly). Anyway this book owns, if you, like me, are a big dork about Mr. Show and anything Mr. Show related, get it!

[Josh · Rating 3 out of 5]

Definitely worth a few yucks-- especially if you are a fan of "Mr. Show," or are on the same comedic wavelength as Odenkirk and Cross. Neither of the full-length screenplays contained herein are pure brilliance, but they have their moments-- and one can imagine them being much funnier when propped up by the performances of these gents. The book also contains three brief sketches, which are amusing in their own right.

[Michael Martin · Rating 4 out of 5]

Alright, so I'm a bit prejudiced in that I think that "Mr. Show" with Bob Odenkirk and David Cross was HBO's finest half hour comedy offering...ever.

This book is made up of two complete rejected film scripts that followed the demise of Mr. Show, and although a bit uneven, it has some HUGE laughs within. The parody of Baz Luhrman films alone is worth the price of the book.

Highly recommended for fans of offbeat humor. I loved it.

[Steve · Rating 2 out of 5]

As great as Mr. Show is, the two main scripts in this book fall flat. The stories just don't live up to the highs of the original show. For fans this is still something worth checking out, if only for the audiobook version instead, as hearing these sketches in Bob and David's voices might redeem them slightly.

[Denise Morse · Rating 2 out of 5]

I really enjoyed the first part of the book, the script about how to get a movie made. It was laugh out loud funny with a hilarious take on a DMV style line to make a movie and all the elements that are needed. Very very funny and I want to watch this movie :)

The second part just lost me. I could not get into any of the other scripts/scenes as much as the first.

[Andrea · Rating 4 out of 5]

Although I can see why Hollywood Said No, there's a lot of amusement to be had here, especially if you are a Mr. Show fan. And I recommend the audio version of this, because not only does most of the cast make an appearance, but there are some cute out takes, and the readers/performers make the most of the material.

[flms23 · Rating 3 out of 5]

Completely absurd. And ridiculously funny. If you're a fan of Mr Show, this will tickle your funny bone. If you picked it up because you're a fan of Bob from breaking bad or just call Saul or a fan of David from the greatness that is the chipmunks trilogy (easily the greatest trilogy in the history of film) then you will be sorely disappointed.