A Dad-Shaped Hole in My Heart

by H. Norman Wright

"Words of caring and restoration for women whose dads were missing from their lives--whether emotionally, physically, or spiritually"--Provided by publisher.

192 pages, Paperback

First published July 1, 2005

About the author

H. Norman Wright is a well-respected Christian counselor who has helped thousands of people improve their relationships and deal with grief, tragedy, and other concerns. He helps couples bring vibrancy to their relationships through counseling, seminars, and more than 90 books, including Before You Say “I Do” and After You Say “I Do.” Norm also reveals insights for spiritual growth, great relationships, and success in devotionals that include Strong to the Core, Quiet Times for Every Parent, and Truly Devoted: What Dogs Teach Us About Life, Love, and Loyalty. www.hnormanwright.com

Reviews

[Cristina · Rating 3 out of 5]

Dirigido a mujeres que experimentan un vacío emocional asociado a su padre. Ya sea por su ausencia emocional, negligencia, abuso, abandono o muerte.

El autor sostiene que, pese a tu edad, es importante que entiendas la influencia de tu padre en tu vida. Cuando ésta ha sido negativa, subraya la necesidad de afrontar el dolor para lograr la liberación de todo aquello que te impide avanzar en la vida.

Contiene testimonios tanto de hijas que aún se encuentran en proceso de sanar, como de aquellas que lo han logrado. Al mostrar ambas posibilidades, permite ampliar el panorama, reconocer la existencia de posibilidades y mostrar que el cambio interno es posible.

Wright es graduado de la Universidad Westmount, del Seminario Teológico Fuller y de la Universidad Pepperdine. Ha recibido dos doctorados honorarios del Seminario Bautista Western Conservative y de la Universidad Biola. Su formación influye notoriamente en la perspectiva plasmada en su obra, pues propone la fe y la oración como recursos importantes para sanar. Asimismo, propone que existe un padre terrenal y un padre celestial; enfatizando en que este último es una figura significativa a la cual puede recurrirse.

En este orden de ideas, puede que no todos los lectores se identifiquen con su mensaje en términos de compatibilidad de creencias. Por otro lado, si tú (como yo) eres terapeuta, considero que encontrarás utilidad en su contenido, pues los casos de hijos heridos son frecuentes en consulta y algunos pacientes son apegados a la religión.

Para finalizar, considero que aunque el autor se dirige directamente al género femenino, su alcance no se limita a ellas.

[Justin Ruszkiewicz · Rating 3 out of 5]

You’ll get a lot out of this if 1) you take the time to do the exercises, and 2) this is one of the first books you’ve read on a subject like this. For me, I’ve read many books on healing through the wounds that family and, more specifically, fathers can leave you. My father and I had a difficult relationship for a few years, yet we have experienced beautiful blessings in a new kind of relationship in the past few years. If I read this book well earlier in my healing journey, this would’ve been such a great resource.

A few big issues I have with this book, however:

First, the book is primarily for woman but doesn’t say that it is. The author assumes that the only people reading this are women, and nothing from the back of the book or even the introduction gave the disclaimer of who this book is crafted for. It became so excessively clear at times that I felt all but disconnected to the book. It wouldn’t be a negative thing if it was clear at the start, but again, it wasn’t.

Second, the first half of the book (chapters 1-7) are not nearly as strong as the back half of the book. I enjoyed the stories and examples shared, but it felt repetitive by the second chapter. Frankly, I didn’t get much out of the majority of the book… until the last 3-4 chapters. The end is very powerful and helpful, making the book a bit better than it seemed to be in the first half.

Overall, it’s a good, not great, resource. But God will surely use it to help hurting people navigate through their journeys towards coming to know God as their perfect father, as well as forgiving their earthly fathers.

Rating: 5/10, three stars.

[Lil · Rating 4 out of 5]

Reading this book made me realize that my dad really isn't all that bad so that is one comfort. Got a few tears out of me near the end and this book really highlights what an important role fathers play in their daughters' lives. Though a good chunk of the book wasn't applicable to me, it was still an enjoyable read and interesting perspective into how to forgive and seek reconciliation if possible. It made me want to be better to my dad and be more understanding of the person he is now- the good, the bad, all of it.

I do enjoy some of the minor exercises throughout the book that requires me to dig deeper within to see the issues I am having with my dad and what part I play in them.

If you see any sort of lacking in your father-daughter relationship, I would recommend giving this book a try.

[María Dolores Torres Játiva · Rating 5 out of 5]

Excelente libro para sanar

El libro te ayuda a comprender que nuestros padres terrenales son humanos y sus vivencias pudieron ser dolorosas, por eso no supieron como criarnos.
Pero nuestro Padre Celestial no es humano y Él no nos va a fallar debemos ir a sus brazos y dejar que Él nos cuide y crie.

[Bere Vera · Rating 5 out of 5]

Éste libro sirve para cualquiera, yo aún tengo a mi papá gracias a Dios y lo amo, viví con mis padres hasta después de los 20 años, mi padre se esforzó por darme lo que él consideraba que yo requería, pero eso no significa que efectivamente todos los espacios hayan quedado cubiertos, este libro me esta mostrado esos espacios que por una u otra razón aún esperan ser llenados :)