A Bantu in My Bathroom: Debating Race, Sexuality and Other Uncomfortable South African Topics

by Eusebius McKaiser

Why are South Africans so uncomfortable with deep disagreement? Why do is their such a high level of intolerance for people with opposing views? Eusebius McKaiser is on a mission to raise the level of debate in South Africa. He provokes readers from their comfort zones and lures them into the debates that shape opinions and society. With surprising candour and intensely personal examples, McKaiser examines our deepest-felt prejudices and ingrained assumptions. Don't expect to read this book and escape with your defences intact. Immensely readable and completely engaging, McKaiser tackles deeply South African questions of race, sexuality and culture, including: Can blacks be racist? Why is our society so violent? Is it morally okay to be prejudiced against skinny lovers? Why is the presidential penis so problematic? Is unconditional love ever a good thing? Is it necessary to search for a national identity?

Genres: South Africa, Nonfiction, Politics, Africa

209 pages, Paperback

First published September 1, 2012

About the author

Eusebius McKaiser was a political and social analyst at the Wits Centre for Ethics. He was also a popular radio talk show host, a top international debate coach, a master of ceremonies and a public speaker of note.

He loved nothing more than a good argument, having been both former National South African Debate Champion and the 2011 World Masters Debate Champion. His analytic articles and columns have been widely published in South African newspapers and the New York Times. McKaiser studied law and philosophy. He taught philosophy in South Africa and England.

Reviews

[Barry Gilder · Rating 3 out of 5]

I originally bought Eusebius' book as a result of a Twitter challenge I had put to him: 'I'll read yours if you read mine'. Due to major moves in my life, it took me a long time to get around to finishing it. I don't know if he has yet read mine. No matter.

As I read the first few essays on race and racism in South Africa, I thought "Mmm, some good points'. He deals, in a courageous and straightforward style, with delicate issues in a post-apartheid South Africa. But as I continued reading, the word 'Sophist' kept impinging itself into my head. I had to look up the word again to make sure my brain was dragging up the right word. Eusebius would understand. He studied and taught philosophy. Wikipedia translates the original Greek word as 'one who does wisdom'. That's indeed the feeling I get from this book - the 'doing of wisdom'.

But there is something ultimately unsatisfying and repetitive as one proceeds through the book. There is courage and frankness and relevance and perhaps 'wisdom', but there is a lack of fundamental perception and analysis. The often delicate issues he deals with are superficially skimmed in what is little more than an on-going ethical musing, suitable perhaps for the radio talk shows that Eusebius hosts (and he is certainly one of the more progressive and challenging talk show hosts in South Africa), but, for me at least, he fails to delve behind the surface of the phenomena he explores to help us understand the complex causal social, political, economic and other factors that underlie the issues.

A good read for a while, but a struggle to get through.

Sorry Eusebius. Now, you read mine and get your revenge...

[Liesbeth Raymakers · Rating 3 out of 5]

Interesting collection of short stories that pose relevant question. The philosophical, at times bullying style of winning all the arguments posed becomes irritating after a few essays. Rather than leaving a sense of wondering or delving deeper into the questions posed, or leaving the answer to the reader, McKaiser wins every argument. Good observations and interesting eye-openers into South Africa's diverse and hurt past, though...

[Sipho Lukhele · Rating 4 out of 5]

I guess I am only giving the book four star's since I feel like I know most of the stories, thanks to my huge radio following of Euby.

There really is not much to say except that this book is really amazing. I have always known that Mr. McKaiser was a world debate champion and if you read this book, you will know why. I highly recommend it.

[Dimakatso Makgati · Rating 4 out of 5]

Not quite a simple read, but it's interesting!

[Helen · Rating 4 out of 5]

Are personal preferences for races, physical characteristics, or species bigoted or acceptable? These are some of the topics explored in this book, with the author rationalising his own personal views. I did not enjoy these arguments as much as the autobiographical elements of a provocative social conscience gone too soon, particularly regarding his experiences with the label “coconut”. The book was enlightening for me to understand the emerging black middle class in South Africa. RIP and thank you Eusebius McKaiser 1978-2023.

[Hanni · Rating 2 out of 5]

I was really looking forward to reading this book based on many recommendations of friends that it was one of the most brilliant new commentaries/analysis of South African society. Unfortunately, I was not nearly as impressed as I had anticipated. Although I can't deny that McKaiser can certainly write and has a unique style with which he expresses his provocative and insightful opinions, I felt like it was too anecdotal, reading more like an autobiography in the race and sexuality essays, even coming off as really full of himself at times. Also as an HIV activist, I felt his discussion on this was lacking considerably and that he could have developed his essay much further but instead he barely scratched the surface of the stigmatic divide which exists. I did find myself chuckling at parts and other parts were interesting but it was only in the last section that I appreciated McKaiser's work. His analysis of South African culture was spot on and i was especially intrigued by his discussion of the Brett Murray piece and South Africans' relationship to artists and artworks as well as his essay on the role of language with identity. It was worth the read to add it to my repertoire but I wouldn't go far with my recommendation.

[Acatraps · Rating 4 out of 5]

A collection of short stories about race, sexuality and love. Written by a controversial political commentator in South Africa who is male, coloured and gay. I enjoyed this book, I think... The author is not a likeable character, at times it feels that his opinions are out there and everyone else can go fly, but I also found that an endearing quality. I was slightly frustrated at the quality of his arguments, and just wished that books did not have a word limit. I am confident that Eusebius would have thoroughly thought through his essays for the book, without the reader feeling as if, 'that is not the same thing' or but 'you've not considered this'. That is how I felt on several occasions during the book. However, the book is definitely thought provoking and raises controversial issues and has an honesty about the state of South Africa, and often, quite frankly, the state of most of the world. I would recommend this to people who love a good debate especially about some of the prevalent issues in South Africa (and the world) today.

[Diane Brown · Rating 4 out of 5]

The book is a collection of essays from Eusebius McKaiser on race, sexuality and other topical issues. The author is a radio talk show host in South Africa.

In this book McKaiser gives us his opinions on affirmative action, disagreement on "blacks can’t be racist" notions, the ‘coloured’ community, homosexuality and 'coming out', sexism, love, white denial and guilt, the role of comedy in post apartheid SA and ‘love’ of animals. His take on polygamy and black / white racism are interesting and urge reflection. He also speaks of the dilemna facing white people in South Africa and urges whites to claim their public space, drop soppy guilt and acknowledge the privilege that they occupy in South Africa.

I enjoyed reading the book even though I did not agree with quite a few of the conclusions he reaches in this book

[Robyn · Rating 5 out of 5]

Having been an avid listener of Eusebius for a good while now I was absolutely thrilled to finally get my hands on this book, but also quite worried that the voice I've relied on for thorough and in depth debate wouldn't leave me feeling as mentally stimulated.
UB, as many callers to his radio show affectionately call him, has once again demonstrated his ability to invoke thought and self-reflection as he discusses a number of issues that are consistently present in the South African political, and personal, landscape. I feel better able to give considerations for my own beliefs and opinions having been given a small insight into the UB brain.
Great read that was far too quickly finished.

[‘Nami’s Nook · Rating 3 out of 5]

4/5 stars

This was such a riveting read. Author, Eusebius MacKaiser, compiled essays of very controversial topics that we as South Africans need to have more open and honest discussions about. His work was a pleasure to read, as it did not confuse one with the use of 'post-grad language'.

I would surely recommend this book to anyone (predominantly South Africans) who are ready to have more open conversations about or racial history, the LGBTI+ community and so much more!

[Zozo Mogoera · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was a roller coaster read. A seasoned debater. I think I would have enjoyed the book even without his personal stories. These were a large cherry on top not even, a huge bowl of dessert. Debate should be compulsory at school to teach the kids to tackle issues holistically and test the merits of what they believe in.

His stories are raw and juicy. Itjoo. A must read

[Nokulunga · Rating 4 out of 5]

I admire McKaiser's insights into most of the subjects if not all. The book felt like a blog which I liked. It was fun book to read, engaging as well. Some things I agreed with and some I didnt. Which is the purpose of the book I suppose. I think it's a good book, funny and quite insightful.

[Lydia Nkutha · Rating 3 out of 5]

The book covers interesting issues which South Africans are still grappling with, esp. the racism issue.
It's an easy book to read, but I have been struggling to finish it. Some of issues are dealt with superficially.

[Jill · Rating 3 out of 5]

Some essays are not to be missed - Bantu in my Bathroom, on Coconuts, on the divided nation - might even go well for class assignments! Other essays leave a little to be desired.

[Lorna · Rating 4 out of 5]

Thought provoking and interesting.

[Ntebeng · Rating 5 out of 5]

I couldn't put this book down. A conversation starter touches on issues that we don't want to go onto. Awesome for friends, family and colleagues

[Smangele Belebesi · Rating 4 out of 5]

Sometimes funny, sometimes maddening, something enlightening, always thought provoking. Touches on our "sore bits". Absolutely enjoyed it