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Come Clean

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Justine is trying to cope with the desperate loneliness she feels now her twin brother, Joshua, no longer lives at home. After trying to drown her feelings with her first ever experiment with alcohol, she is woken early by her mother one Sunday morning. Bundled into the car by her livid parents, Justine is driven to Come Clean, a rehabilitation centre for drug addicts and alcoholics. Confused, vulnerable and covered with vomit from her first hangover, Justine is forcibly admitted to cure her “addiction”.

There she begins a strict boot-camp routine of humiliation and discipline, where they attempt to strip her of her identity in order to rebuild her a better person. Justine escapes the daily torture at the centre by talking to Joshua in her head, reflecting back on their childhood and trying to puzzle out why her brother was a tortured soul… and why he chose to leave her.

Because of the intensely personal nature of the narrative, this book engages the reader instantly and, however tough the subject matter, it is a real page-turner. At its heart, Come Clean is about a girl's inability to deal her grief and her family’s ignorance of her pain. Justine shows strength, resilience, courage and hope while living a nightmare reality.

Paperback

First published January 1, 2004

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About the author

Terri Paddock

5 books1 follower
Terri Paddock is an American author living in London. As well as writing, she runs the website WHAT'S ON STAGE. Paddock has been editing Whatsonstage.com for all of its ten years and has been a writer and journalist for most of her professional career,

Although she has written one book for adults - "Beware the Dwarfs" -, "Come Clean" is her first book for children.

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Community Reviews

5 stars
139 (39%)
4 stars
125 (35%)
3 stars
56 (15%)
2 stars
24 (6%)
1 star
11 (3%)
Displaying 1 - 30 of 35 reviews
Profile Image for Emily May.
2,223 reviews321k followers
May 25, 2011
It's probably been about five or six years since I first read this book but I can still remember it to this day, it really affected me. I don't tend to review books that I haven't read in years for the obvious reason that they won't be as detailed or accurate. And I unfortunately don't have this to hand in order to pull some miraculous quote from it. The reason I want to write a review is because this little unheard-of gem greatly deserves one. When I added it to my 'read' shelf on goodreads I couldn't believe just how few people have read, rated and reviewed it.

The story is about a girl (Justine) whose extremely strict and religious father sends her to a boot-camp-style rehabilitation centre simply for acting like most teenagers her age do - going out and getting drunk. Her one night as a regular teen lands her in this facility where she is mentally and sexually abused. The story constantly alludes to Justine's brother - Joshua - and we gradually get some kind of picture of what happened to him as the plot unfolds. It becomes clear early on that Joshua has died and was also sent to the rehab centre prior to his death.

It's a book that is both horrifying and sad, and definitely should have more reads than this. It's one of those that left me feeling slightly shell-shocked and wondering just who I could recommend it to. I don't know how available it is anymore and I don't know if anyone will actually read it following this review but at least I've done my part for a book that's still a favourite to this day.
640 reviews68 followers
January 6, 2019
I really wasn't a fan of this book. The way certain characters are treated by other characters made me really angry. I'm frustrated because, from the synopsis, this book had the potential to be ground-breaking, but it was just bad.
Profile Image for Melanie.
398 reviews75 followers
May 28, 2011
I read this book on a recommendation from a friend and I'm so glad she recommended it because it's not something I would have picked up of my own accord.

Come clean follows Justine's life in a rehab programme called 'Come Clean'. She narrates her experiences as if talking to her twin brother Joshua who had been in the programme some months earlier. This is interwoven with tales of the two of them growing up together. In the flashbacks especially it is easy to see how strong their relationship was.

There are definitely some horrifying moments in this book where I just found myself shocked by what was going on, and at others I found myself welling up, the most notable of these when Justine's parents are leaving her at the centre. I had only two problems with this book. First, I'm pretty sure the way they run the programme is actually illegal but I tried to look over that as the book and the struggle Justine faces wouldn't have been the same without it. Second, I found aspects of the ending to be a bit unbelieveable, but these aren't enough to change my overall opinion.

This is a sometimes awful, often heartbreaking, always amazing book.
Profile Image for Amanzi.
241 reviews
December 28, 2021
I first read this way back in Year 7 (13 years ago) and re-read it several times throughout high school, it was one of my favourite books. Having recently re-read it, I found myself not loving the dark, intense subject matter and injustices throughout the story, but did enjoy following along with Justine and her journey. Having now learned this book is based on very real accounts from Straight, Inc. survivors makes the story even more harrowing. A good read and I enjoyed the writing, but a dark one.
Profile Image for Suzanne.
20 reviews
March 7, 2010
It’s hard for me to find a book that will move me to anything other than laughter. It’s just simply how I am. This book, this piece of teen-fiction moved me to tears, and continues to do so every time I pick it off my shelf.


Come Clean is not just a story about addiction and rehabilitation, but a story about loneliness, confusion and identity. The protagonist’s struggle against over-zealous parents and brutal rehab counsellors is moving and when at times it seems her strength is waning, you find yourself gripping the book in a white-knuckle grasp and desperately willing her on. Her sad confusion over why her twin-brother left wrenches at your heart and when she talks to him in her head, trying to escape the humiliation of the boot-camp environment she finds herself in, emotion starts to bubble.


Finally. The ending. I won’t give it away, but the climax of the plot is deeply woven with tortured truths that grip the reader and will not allow them to put the book down under it has bought every shred of emotion to the surface.


Brilliantly written and flawless, the characterisation is well-rounded and real and the detail is rich enough that you are able to imagine it all very clearly while reading, without bogging the reader down with unnecessary details. There will be passion, tears, laughter and desperate longing before the end is through.

Profile Image for Heather.
2,380 reviews11 followers
July 3, 2016
After one night of teenage drinking, fifteen-year-old Justine finds herself in an addiction rehabilitation centre 'Come Clean' along with a number of other teenage addicts. The program that these kids have to undergo to break them of their habits include strip searches, humiliation, bullying and torture, and are described in quite horrific detail. Yet despite the conditions, Justine remains strong, courageous and defiant. This is not an enjoyable book, but it is certainly compelling as the reader feels Justine's fear and confusion as she struggles to maintain her identity. Sadly though, she also discovers why her twin brother is longer with her.
Profile Image for Hanna Fawcett.
7 reviews
September 15, 2011
This book is shocking, devastating and heart-breaking. I bought it when I was 15 and the story still stays with me years later. A must read for any teenager.
Profile Image for Monica Kessler.
402 reviews2 followers
November 30, 2025
Wow. Although this novel started off weakly in my opinion, it soon grew into a strong and absolutely devastating story. It charts the story of a girl sent to one of those american teengage rehabilitation centres, and is based on the experience of the author's sister's real life circumstances. Once you've pushed through the not-so-great opening, you're galloping through the horrors as the life at one of these quasi-official centres is explored.

The book is tonally curious – it definitely reads as YA lit fic, but there's one scene of CSA that's extremely explicit and traumatic and made me wonder what the target audience is meant to be. Would teenagers reading that end up traumatised? Or is it good for them to experience that in a novel before they might have to deal with related situations in real life (although hopefully not)? Or is the book aimed at parents who were thinking of sending their own children to these institutions, to provide a showcase of why that would be the worst decision ever? The teenage POV suggests the audience is supposed to be teen, but I hope people are aware of a very adult scene before they dive in.

The story is completely shocking until you remember that a) these things have happened in real life, and b) this was based on Straight inc (which is the programme the author's sister was under). If you look up Straight inc, you can find a detailed Reddit article which shows that this book potentially is just covering the tip of the iceberg of issues.

The novel is really really sad but it's the type of sad which leaves you dry eyed and face aching rather than allowing the release of tears. Josh's story was pretty dreadful too.

One character is a bit of a “deus ex machina”, but it worked in context and BOY am I glad he turned up.

The parents in this book were SO DUMB. Really – make a mistake once and repeat it again, why don't you?

It leaves me thinking about how people in positions of power can be so dangerous and roles of responsibility should require careful training and qualification – not a single drop of safeguarding was to be seen here. I'm glad we have DBS checking and safeguarding rules in this country. It's really the wild wild west elsewhere.

I wouldn't necessarily recommend this book to anyone because of the traumatic scenes, and it's also not going to receive a perfect score because it was a) hard to read (even though I flew through it) and b) the beginning was a bit rough.


CAWPILE ratings

Characters: 7/10 serviceable but really you're only meant to know Justine fully, and I guess the villains
Atmosphere: 10/10
Writing: 7/10
Plot: 8/10
Intrigue: 8/10
Logic: 7/10 losing marks because the end scene was more horror movie than real life I guess
Enjoyment: 7/10 I did not enjoy but I did gallop through

CAWPILE average: 7.71/10
Goodreads rating: 3.86*
Profile Image for Felicity.
1,133 reviews28 followers
December 31, 2022
I rescued this from my mum's house move as this used to belong to my sister and the blurb intrigued me.
Justine Ziegler has been admitted to Come Clean but she hasn't really done anything wrong and is not an addict but no one believes her and her life becomes more horrible.

I found this hard to get into at first and was disturbed with the dystopian world Paddock created. It felt so vivid and detailed that I had to google if this was based on reality. shockingly, it is based on a real rehabilitation unit and is dedicated to survivors of it including the author's sister. In the novel, Justine is coming to terms to being separated from her twin Joshua as well as adjusting to the abuse that she and other members of the programme receive on a daily basis. Paddock uses flashbacks so we learn about her early childhood and what happened to Joshua. I flew through the second half and had to know what was going to happen to Justine.

This is a clever book which deals with rehab, brainwashing, neglect, rape, dysfunctional families and grief. I thought Paddock did a brilliant job and the fact that her sister went through a traumatic experience like this made it more powerful. Definitely not a book for younger children!!
Profile Image for Rebecca Travers.
385 reviews1 follower
July 26, 2018
This one really got me. Loaned to me by a friend I had never heard of it before but the premise really intrigued me and it didn't disappoint.

Justine is put into a rehabilitation style programme to combat her addiction, though we as readers are not told what her addiction is too and are left to question that notion. Told through flashbacks to childhood days with her twin brother and her days in the abominable Come Clean programme I became more and more addicted to this story. An unflinching tale of grief, told with skill and with a plot crafted excellently.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
Profile Image for Melissa.
256 reviews
November 19, 2018
i read this when i was like 14 but i dont remember ever finishing it because i think i lent it to my goth bff and by the time i got it back i had to get it back to the library. anyway its just as harrowing as i remember. some of the language is soo S2 english short story but tbh it is for teens so i cant be too angry about it. also dwights speech always being written as he sounds was so jarring. that said the ending made me cry!!!! obviously!
Profile Image for Michelle.
435 reviews16 followers
August 3, 2017
No one wants to end up in this rehab center....
Interesting concept but not my favorite!
120 reviews1 follower
May 15, 2021
Wielkie rozczarowanie.
Irytujący bohaterowie, absurdalne sytuacje i co chwilę, kompletnie niepotrzebne, dygresje.
Bardzo zmarnowany potencjał.. Niestety
5 reviews
November 11, 2023
Gross. Slow. Uninteresting.

The next thing the author should write is an apology.
1 review
February 26, 2024
Not too sure about this one. The writing wasn't my style, quite unsophisticated and I struggled somewhat hence the amount of time it took to read it. I'm sure others would enjoy.
Profile Image for Amy W.
595 reviews13 followers
February 29, 2016
This book confused me a bit. When I bought it I thought it was a true story (big fan of true stories), but when I came to read it I saw that there was actually nothing in the synopsis to say it was true. Nevertheless I started reading it, but kept thinking to myself "no way" and "that would never happen". It spoilt my enjoyment of the story as I couldn't stop asking, "why would someone make this stuff up?"

It was only after I got to the last page and saw the dedications that it transpired (in a very subtle way) that Come Clean is actually inspired by a real teenage treatment facility called Straight, Incorporated. I read up about it on the internet and then suddenly everything made sense. Kids really were treated this way. The main character Justine and her brother, they're made up, but the whole thing is inspired by real life boot-camp style treatment methods.

The history of Straight, Inc is shocking and fascinating – hard to believe it really happened – so I don't know why the back cover of Come Clean doesn't make more of the fact it was a real thing. I would have read it with a completely different mindset. Perhaps the author wasn't allowed to reference it?

Anyway, the story itself was quite good. I feel it dragged on a bit though and the ending was a little far-fetched. It used flashbacks to Justine's life pre-Come Clean to fill in her backstory rather than being written in a linear fashion. To me it was fairly obvious what had happened to Joshua, but I had to wait until pretty much the end to have this confirmed.

Reading this as a 27-year-old, I'm probably outside of the book's target market. Although parts were certainly shocking, the whole thing didn't personally affect me as much as it might do a younger reader. I definitely think teens would get more out of the book than me – it would certainly be an incentive to keep on the straight and narrow! I liked it overall though, so 3 stars.
Profile Image for Deirdre.
19 reviews5 followers
May 10, 2014
I first read this book when I was about 10 years old. Although not able to fully understand just how disturbing and heart-wrenching it really is,I was definitely able to appreciate the writing and the feelings Justine goes through. Now 20 years old, I have finished it for the second time and the trauma and emotional depth of the book definitely struck me more this time.

Before I read it again, I found out online that 'Come Clean' is based on a real rehabilitation centre which has been the subject of controversy for their practices. This makes what happens in the book all the more real and disturbing. Also, given that Paddock's sister is a survivor of Straight Inc., she must have second hand experience of the institution. I also found it incredible that Paddock is English, but the story is set in America and she gets it so, so right; the dialogue, the setting, the stores, the colloquial language etc.

It is such, such a shame that this book is not better known and not recognized as one of the best. Because it really is one of the best. This is what all YA books should be like. (I'm just assuming it's YA, I don't know what the author would classify it as). Truly one of my all- time, if not my all-time favourite book.
Profile Image for Iris.
104 reviews
February 12, 2012
I first read this book back when I was about 13 and then re-read it again when I was 16. Both times were amazingly captivating and I'm shocked to how this book hasn't gotten more recognition for how absolutely well-written it is.

The story follows Justine, a girl who is accused of drug-abuse by her parents. She is taken to a rehabilitation institute against her will and is forced to take part in rehabilitation activities and procedures which are far from the norm. Except, Justine's innocent.

There are simply not enough words to describe how much I adore this novel. It manages to be consistently hard-hitting and emotional as well as sustain an entertaining humourous edge from time to time. I can tell that I will be able to read and re-read and re-read this book and not get tired of it.

The characters are perfect and you feel so many different emotions along with Justine through her struggle to prove she's innocent.

Seriously, give this book a go. It's one of the best books I've read ever. That's right. Ever. It's poignant and leaves you with a haunting memory long after you've finished the last sentence. Honestly an absolute genius piece of literature.
Profile Image for Mary.
48 reviews14 followers
August 3, 2012
I read this irst, many years ago when I was a about 15 and although I forgot the name of it, the stiry really stayed with me. After a very long search to find this book again, I finally came across it earlier this year. Reading it again, I found it just a heart-wrenching as before.
The reason it this book was so hard for me to find was because I could only remember the part where she found her brother in the pool. Even now, that scene still makes me cry so much, not because she found her brother dead in a pool, but because she lay down beside him afterwards.
I have read a lot of very sad books but this one really stands out as the saddest moment I've ever read and I think it's because of the simplicity of it. I almost felt my heart breaking a little bit!

This is definitely a must read for anyone who, like me, like a really good tearjerker!!
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
Profile Image for madziar.
1,544 reviews
November 17, 2015
W latach 80-tych powstało w Stanach wiele prywatnych ośrodków dla trudnych, uzależnienionych nastolatków. Do jednego z nich, po pierwszej imprezie z alkoholem, rodzice odwoża "dla jej dobra" 15-letnią Justine. A tam z wolna odsłaniają się skandaliczne metody "rehabilitacji".
Byłaby to kolejny reportaż o skażonym brudem miejscu, gdyby nie sama forma książki - wewnętrzny dialog Justin z utraconym bratem bliźniakiem czynią z niej literaturę wysokiej klasy. Autorka sugestywnie opisała proces dochodzenia do siebie po utracie najbliższej osoby w warunkach, gdy odbycie żałoby uniemożliwia najbliższe otoczenie. Ośrodek torturuje przebywających tam młodych ludzi i odczłowiecza ich, stawiając w roli kata grupę rówieśniczą. Słabsze jednostki nie wychodzą z tego cało.
Smutna konkluzja autorki mówi, że podobe ośrodki, ale pod innymi nazwami, funkcjonują do dnia dzisiejszego.
Profile Image for Emma Ayres.
1 review
April 4, 2013
This book was fantastic.
I loved Paddock's style of writing in first person, present tense - everything seemed so much more real. Everything was revealed in drips rather than all at once, and certain questions are not even answered until the last few pages. I was thoroughly gripped throughout the novel.
The fact that Come Clean is based on a real institution makes the book even more gripping, and it is so close to the real thing (Straight Inc, which luckily was closed down in 1993) so her experience has the potential to be closer to the truth than we realise.
All in all, this is one of the best semi-fictional books that I've read and I wouldn't hesitate to recommend it again.
Profile Image for Gillian.
276 reviews2 followers
June 4, 2011
I'm so glad i picked this up at a library sale even though there wasn't much information on the back cover! this book brought me to tears in parts, i don't usually cry because of a story in a book! its sad hard hitting full of love hate addiction humiliation death its also funny in parts when the narrator talks of her childhood! its one of the best books i've read in a very long time. read it if you haven't already.
Profile Image for Samantha.
265 reviews
June 5, 2012
I really struggled with this; mostly because the "Come Clean" clinic?
Y'all that's got to be one of the most illegally run rehab centre around.
Definitely NOT what teenagers that may feel they need help - be it from drug related issues or depression - need to read about. I know I'd definitely shy away if I thought that's what rehab was going to be like for me.
Just a lot of URGH-ing through this book. URGH.
Profile Image for Maria.
16 reviews
August 21, 2011
i thaught this book was really captivating and interesting. it kept you involved without giving anything away and it was mysterious aswell as romantic. the plot was thrilling and kept you guessing at everything. i would really recomend this book.
Profile Image for Jane.
25 reviews4 followers
December 19, 2009
this book is based on a true story, it was a sad read but good
19 reviews1 follower
February 21, 2016
Oh gosh, I read this book so long ago, but I abslutely love it. It definitely has to be one my favourites.
1 review
Read
October 17, 2011
I was amazing ! I really loved the book !!!!! xxxx BEST BOOK I'VE EVER READ!!!!!!! xxxx
Profile Image for Caitriona.
198 reviews
February 9, 2012
Horribly sad, terribly disturbing, and thoroughly gripping. Sensitive souls like me will be very much affected by it, but also in awe of it. Fantastic.
Displaying 1 - 30 of 35 reviews

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