Gasping for Air: The Stranglehold of Narcissistic Abuse

by Dana S. Diaz

Some cycles are hard to break.

Forced out of an unhappy home at a young age, Dana S. Diaz swears to make it on her own and never fall victim to the same abuse she witnessed growing up. But that’s before she falls for Darren. It doesn’t take long, however, for Dana to meet the darker version of Darren—a narcissist who seeks to control Dana in every way. Despite her best efforts, she is caught in the cycle of trauma once again. But how can she free herself from Darren’s stranglehold?In Gasping for Air, Dana invites readers along on her odyssey of healing and empowerment as she breaks free from the grasp of her 25-year-long abusive relationship. She fearlessly delves into old wounds to reveal the truth behind a lifetime of lies and stitches them closed as a new and resilient woman.

An inspiring true story filled with strife and revelation, this multi-award-winning and best-selling debut memoir exposes the raw truth of emotional, psychological and physical trauma, and is a bold testament of survival.

554 pages, Kindle Edition

Published June 4, 2023

Reviews

[Tamara D Frank · Rating 5 out of 5]

Couldn’t put it down!

I was captivated by this story. Incredible depiction of how a narcissist keeps a person in their grip. She does an excellent job explaining what we’re all wondering… WHY would someone stay in this kind of relationship? Well done!

[Karen Robinson · Rating 5 out of 5]

Dana S. Diaz shares a raw, deeply human journey in Gasping for Air, detailing her experience of lifelong narcissistic abuse—from childhood through a 25-year marriage—into recovery and advocacy. Her personal diary, once hidden under a couch cushion, becomes a powerful narrative of survival and transformation.

As a therapist, I appreciate the way Diaz clearly articulates the psychological tactics of narcissism: gaslighting, emotional manipulation, and the erosion of self-worth. Her writing helps readers understand the often-hidden patterns of coercive control, and how abuse can leave someone feeling permanently unsafe within their own mind and body.

What stands out is Diaz's journey to reclaim identity and health. Her crisis began when her body showed the signs of extreme stress—rare lung disease, autoimmune symptoms, debilitating fatigue—directly tied to her trauma. When medical professionals warned she was “barely alive,” she recognized the urgent need for freedom and healing. Her courage in turning toward therapy, advocacy, and purpose is both inspiring and instructive.

This memoir is a lifeline to survivors who feel isolated and confused: Diaz powerfully states they are not alone. It serves as a resource for therapists and legal professionals alike—because her story illuminates the emotional, psychological, and physical dimensions of chronic abuse.

In soft, clear language, Diaz reminds readers—that asking for love and healing is not weakness, but a courageous act of reclaiming self. Her story reinforces that trauma survivors can rebuild whole, meaningful lives.

Vivid storytelling grounded in real clinical and personal struggle. Educates about narcissistic abuse in accessible language
Offers hope through recovery and advocacy

A must-read for both therapists and survivors.

Survivors of emotional or narcissistic abuse seeking affirmation and understanding
Therapists, advocates, coaches, and faith leaders working with trauma survivors

Gasping for Air offers rare clarity: trauma doesn’t just harm the mind—it can harm the body too. Diaz’s memoir is a beacon of hope for healing. Her transition from suffering to survival to service makes this book a profound therapeutic tool and testament to resilience.

[Heather Matusiak · Rating 5 out of 5]

The story started off slow, and I didn't connect with the main character. After a couple of chapters, the plot really took off and I couldn't put it down. This author writes about her own life, and it's hard to think that anyone can go through what she did. I know that this happens more than we know, and I couldn't even imagine...

[Jessica Garrison · Rating 5 out of 5]

dana is such an incredible, strong writer and woman. her book serves as a reminder that you are worthy of love, respect, and happiness no matter where you come from. become curious instead of judgmental and realize no one knows exactly what’s going on in a person’s life or inside their head.

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