What Will Survive of Us

by Howard Jacobson

Love can change your life. Can it survive marriage and middle age?

'A rare gift and one to be treasured' SUNDAY TIMES

‘A profound and vital book’ WILLIAM BOYD

'Equal parts funny and challenging' DAILY TELEGRAPH

Lily falls in love with Sam the minute she sets eyes on him. It takes Sam a day or two longer. Curious, because Lily – independent, headstrong, rational – has never quite believed in love; while Sam – confident, passionate, romantic – thought he understood it inside out.

Lily is an award-winning television documentary maker. Sam is an award-winning playwright. Both are in relationships that have quietly expired, but their encounter makes Lily and Sam come alive again. As they begin to work together on the page and on screen, an affair takes hold that they are powerless to resist.

Arriving in mid-life, their relationship opens unexpected new worlds and, for Lily, offers her a surprising form of liberation. But what will happen to them when familiarity, illness and age begin to take their toll? What will survive? Taking us to the edge of desire, love and betrayal across a lifetime, What Will Survive of Us reveals what is left of us when we strip away every layer.

Genres: Fiction, Contemporary, Literary Fiction

290 pages, Kindle Edition

Published February 1, 2024

About the author

Howard Jacobson was born in Manchester, England, and educated at Cambridge. His many novels include The Mighty Walzer (winner of the Bollinger Everyman Wodehouse Prize), Who’s Sorry Now? and Kalooki Nights (both longlisted for the Man Booker Prize), and, most recently, The Act of Love. Jacobson is also a respected critic and broadcaster, and writes a weekly column for the Independent. He lives in London.

Profile of Howard Jacobson in The New York Times.

“The book's appeal to Jewish readers is obvious, but like all great Jewish art — the paintings of Marc Chagall, the books of Saul Bellow, the films of Woody Allen — it is Jacobson's use of the Jewish experience to explain the greater human one that sets it apart. Who among us is so certain of our identity? Who hasn't been asked, "What's your background" and hesitated, even for a split second, to answer their inquisitor? Howard Jacobson's The Finkler Question forces us to ask that of ourselves, and that's why it's a must read, no matter what your background.”—-David Sax, NPR.

Reviews

[Mel Williamson · Rating 1 out of 5]

I thought this was going to be an entertaining love story. I could not have been more wrong. Such a pile of pretentious crap, it was torturous to read. The language is so over the top - feels like Howard Jacobson is trying to make you feel insignificant and lowly compared to his literary brilliance. Utter tosh, quite frankly. The two main characters are very unlikeable and just so full of themselves. I had to force myself to finish it. Definitely not recommended!

[Chloe Smart · Rating 1 out of 5]

I hated this book! The characters were self indulgent, pretentious and deeply unlikeable. I don't like books that have no real structure or driving force behind the plot. People rave about Jacobson's writing but for me it's just so dull and unengaging.

[Dominic Gray · Rating 1 out of 5]

This really wasn’t for me. I found the main characters really unlikeable made worse by the fact that the writing was quite pretentious.

I also just found the story really underwhelming and quite dull. There was a moment in the middle where I thought it had picked up but then I lost it again.

There was also a typo on page 206 where Selena is suddenly referred to as Serena unless they introduced another character and I completely missed that. If it was just me misunderstanding, then it really adds to the fact that I just could not get invested into this story however hard I tried.

[Karen Johnston · Rating 1 out of 5]

What will survive of us is about finding love later in life and exploring a new personality and life. I didn't really enjoy this book. It's very sexual and nothing really happens. We are introduced to Quaid early on but this name changes to Sam throughout the book. It wasn't immediately clear that this was the same person. Similarly, when Quaid talks about a Miss Gore, I didn't understand the relevance and wrongly thought this was the person he later marries. I also felt it was difficult to read at times because there are long, unusual words on every page. The writing style was difficult and it felt as if the author were trying to ascertain their level of intelligence over the reader.

[Liv · Rating 1 out of 5]

I picked up this book because I love the poem the title is based on. I put it back down because it looked like a (trashy) romance book. I picked it back up because Jacobson had won a Booker and far be it from me to be a snob based on genre. I should have left it where I found it.

This book was awful to read. Initially, I resigned myself to the meandering, verbose and clearly trying to be ‘literary’ writing style but by the last 100 pages, I could not hack another profound maxim about love, or some deliberately disorienting indirect speech that was supposed to make me swoon at these awful, self-obsessed characters who were completely boring in the second half of the book.

Neither actually good love story nor literary fiction, this felt like an incredibly sex obsessed self indulgent exploration of the writer’s own fantasies- fantasies which he seemed to not even have a very nuanced view of by the end (how many times do you need to use the word perverse?!).

Like, come on, the “illness” the blurb alludes to is VAGINAL ATROPHY which comes out in the last 50 pages and makes them both weep so much despite the fact we were told about half way through that they ended up together and weren’t having sex. So why did I care? And why was I reading this utter ridiculousness?

Honestly, the novel felt quite claustrophobic because neither Lily nor Sam had any real relationships or conflict outside of each other and apparently the ubiquitous number of books they read (the time for reading they found is beyond me because 90% of their story is trying to find time to see each other outside of their respective marriages or getting ready for their ‘masquerades’ where I kid you not I had to read multiple passages about them WAITING doing nothing in anticipation to go to sex dungeons).

Jacobson used a lot of big words which made the novel overly literary without having any real meaningful engagement with these texts (I haven’t read any Lawrence so I may be slack) other than to show the cleverness of author and characters.

And don’t get me started on the characters. Why on earth did I never learn Lily’s last name but every two seconds it was Quaid this Quaid that?! It felt sexist. Written in 2024, set in 1995, it seemed really dated. Get over yourself, Byronic hero has been done. And for all of Lily’s control, she doesn’t even get a last name.

For what it’s worth I thought the dynamic of their relationship early on (before the ball in Amsterdam) was quite interesting, when it was just the belt, Quaid as submissive as they navigated their affair. Interesting for his character, until it became my masculinity this my manhood that my maleness bla bla bla. Particular highlight was Quaid’s one interaction with another man, Tim, who had come out as gay and he implicitly insults both his friend and Lily by saying, like Tim, their relationship destabilises him as a male. And while there’s some recognition of how self conscious this is, it’s never really challenged or actually resolved other than that at the end he doesn’t lust for Lily? After she almost kills someone he’s finally sick of the ‘perversion’ (no longer any nuance at all) and then they basically never have sex again? All while this flowery, obnoxious language continues? Okay?

The only emotion I felt at Sam’s death was relief.

Maybe a reminder I should be skeptical of ‘romance’ books. Noting 1 star is that I didn’t like it. Maybe it wasn’t that bad but I really struggled.

Why did I continue reading it? Because I didn’t have anything else to read and at the 200 page mark although I was over it I wanted to check off something else on my goodreads.

[David - marigold_bookshelf · Rating 4 out of 5]

What Will Survive of Us, by Booker-winning author Howard Jacobson, is a fascinating novel which appears to be about a highly charged adulterous relationship between two forty-something married philanderers. Yet as the narrative progresses, it explores the nature of how romantic love and physical attraction transmute over time and asks often unsettling questions. Does marriage and domestic familiarity douse the excitement of sexual attraction? And how does one adapt to such changes? Is having children an inevitable and necessary milestone in a long term partnership? What is the nature of love in later life?

Whilst I really enjoyed the book, I did often find some of the prose rather too cumbersome. Lily, a documentary maker, rebukes her playwright partner Sam towards the end of the book:

“I don’t know what that means, Sam, and I doubt you do. I beg of you to think before you speak. Don’t smother me in words.”

I often felt that the writer was smothering me with words and quotations which, whilst showcasing his own literary dominion, leant the dialogues an improbable and grandiose effect which made the characters seem less real and relatable.

But this just means I leave it as a four rather than a five star review, I would still very much recommend the novel.

[Emma · Rating 4 out of 5]

As a rule, I don't find fiction about extra-marital proclivities entertaining but this was beautifully written with an outstanding choice of vocabulary (making me wish I had a dictionary next to me at all times, or was reading it on the Kindle!).

[Emma · Rating 2 out of 5]

Damn this was pretentious.

[Alex Byrne · Rating 1 out of 5]

Unlikeable characters. No real story. Flowery wording that seems dropped in just so we know the author has access to a thesaurus. Last couple of chapters by far the best.

[Rex Fausett · Rating 5 out of 5]

Sometimes a story resonates, and this one was almost the story of parts of my life, but the words are words that I wouldn't have used because Mr. Jacobson uses words better than I do, one of his most attractive attributes. A story of relationships laid out for the world to examine and agree with or condemn according to how you've been educated both formally or by life, a story that laid bare my own relationships in and out of marriage. The rules of attraction are such that we follow those rules willy-nilly without analyzing them first as perhaps we should but therein lies the attraction of attraction. The excitement of a new relationship or the mere suggestion of a new relationship becomes an obsession and an itch that must be, at least occasionally, scratched. Made me want to call N..... and see how she is.

[Kevin · Rating 2 out of 5]

This just did not enchant or even entertain me.
Lily (whoever) and Sam Quaid fall in love very quickly and commence an adulterous affair.
(The word 'adultery' is mentioned many times.)
They spend many months trying to be secret and take way too long to leave their partners and get together. In fact by that time I had really lost interest in What Would Survive of Lily and Sam.
So I skipped nearly 100 pages and just read random paragraphs along the way.
Seems they got into some bondage but I really couldn't care less.
I did read the last 50 or so pages to see if much very interesting happened.
Spoiler: as time passed they got old.

Just BTW, Lily consistently refers to Sam as 'Quaid'. That's fine if she wants to , but it just kept reminding me of Arnold Schwarzenegger's character in Total Recall.

[Dina Blanco · Rating 3 out of 5]

What Will Survive of Us

At times, this felt like an intellectual’s version of Fifty Shades of Grey for the over-fifties which, in my book, is a good thing seeing that the latter was so badly written (again, just my opinion) that I barely made it to chapter three before surrendering. Excuse the pun!

In contrast, Howard Jacobson’s writing is engrossing, poetic, occasionally philosophical, and undeniably elegant. While I couldn’t warm to the main characters, their tangled love story was still intriguing enough to keep me turning the pages.

I honestly don’t understand the one-star reviews. This deserves far more credit. For me, it’s five stars for the writing, but overall three, simply because the protagonists felt a bit too shallow for my taste.

Five stars for the sentences, three for the souls.

[Theodoor · Rating 3 out of 5]

Door de jaren heen alle boeken van Howard Jacobson gelezen en 'what will survive of us ' is goed maar behoort niet tot zijn beste werken. De scherpe humor komt minder uit de verf bij een thema als vreemdgaan. De humor zit nu vooral in de karakter ontwikkel en beschrijvingen maar dit voelt wat ongemakkelijk. Een boek mag schuren maar met een doel en die haal ik er onvoldoende uit. Misschien omdat vanaf de start ik niet goed snap wat Lily in Sam ziet. Uiteindelijk lijkt ze vooral op zijn taalgebruik en houding verliefd te zijn. Het taalgebruik is waar ik zelf wel het meeste van genoot. Bewust archaïsch en ik moest geregeld worden opzoeken maar ze dekten de lading vaak op een mooie wijze en zou willen dat ik ze kon inweven in mijn eigen Engels ofdat er goede Nederlandse versies waren.

[Laura Spira · Rating 3 out of 5]

I really enjoy Howard Jacobson's writing style and I appreciate the cleverness of his books but I always end up being grateful that I never have to encounter any of his characters because they are so unattractive. The protagonists, Lily and Sam, are so deeply self-centred that I cared very little about them, I felt more sympathy with the peripheral people in their lives. Their romantic relationship was in consequence unconvincing to me. Their self indulgent pursuits became rather tedious and I wondered how they found time to maintain their demanding artistic careers. I was quite pleased when they experienced some disappointment after they finally got their act together and married.

[Susan · Rating 3 out of 5]

A story of mid-life lovers and what they get up to. I had mixed feelings.

On the one hand Quaid and Lily are both unlikeable characters and part of me kept feeling ' So what? I don't care about either of you.' Their relationship was so close and detailed, I felt that, as the reader, I was intruding in their personal, intimate lives and that made me feel uncomfortable.

On the other hand, I loved the literary references and pretentiousness that other reviewers have disliked. Some of the quotations and references are laugh out loud funny in the context in which they are used.

On balance however, for me the literary enjoyment did not outweigh the prurience.

[Mark Frangia · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book is anything but a soppy love story. Every dialogue between Lily and Sam is packed with clever repartee; their personalities balance each other out while remaining distinct and different over the years of their relationship. The innuendos are clear and often biting, as is often the case when two very intelligent, cerebral parties collide, then decide to unite. Experimental sexual games, wild romps in foreign locations: in short, all the flavor with some of the pain of a long-term affair becoming something more. The prose is beautiful throughout. Bravo Mr Jacobson!

Mark di Frangia

[Veerle Custers · Rating 3 out of 5]

Ik las het book in het Engels en dat was zeker een uitdaging. Het taalgebruik in dit boek is met momenten poëtisch en filosofisch. Het stoorde me niet, in tegendeel, hoewel moeilijk, vond ik het vaak erg mooi en het zorgde ook dat het lezen vertraagde om juist te genieten. Veel lezers hier hebben weinig sympathie voor de hoofdpersonages. Ik vond ze juist erg interessant om te leren kennen. Het verhaal is diep romantisch, liefhebben met heel je hart, leven met lef. Het laatste deel van het boek vond ik minder, daarom 3 en geen 4 sterren.

[Adam · Rating 5 out of 5]

An intensely romantic book which really resonates for anyone still deeply in love in their 60s or after. (Like me.) He writes with the refinement of someone who has honed their craft over decades - and who is a writer through & through. It poses all the key questions of the third & final act of life. Jacobson, as always, never flinches from the difficult stuff, especially in relation to sexuality.

[Simone Shugg · Rating 3 out of 5]

This was slightly torturous to read. The author’s intellectual arrogance made the writing very hard to become engaged into the story. Yeah we get it Howard…you know lots of big words and literary references. I was glad when it was over. I need to get better at abandoning books that I’m clearly not enjoying. The last few chapters were probably the best and dragged it from 2 stars to 3. But just.

[Ruth · Rating 3 out of 5]

I was a bit disappointed with this book. The story was just a rather long drawn out description of a pretty unpleasant 'romance' between two rather unpleasant people. Perhaps I was missing something but it never really took off for me. I only finished it because it was so beautifully and intelligently written (though perhaps a bit pretentious and verbose at times!!)

[Martin · Rating 2 out of 5]

It does not make me smile giving this book such a LOW rating.
I have enjoyed a number of HJ's previous books but for this one was muddled and characters I really did not like....so even less interest in their mid life sexual escapades.
From the reviews it would appear I am NOT alone at my non enjoyment.

[Jan · Rating 3 out of 5]

Lily makes TV documentaries and meets playwright Sam. They immediately connect and work together, despite having relationships with other people. I found this rather torturous tale of two people who finally commit to each other rather depressing. Neither of the main characters are likeable. The writing is good but not enough to really engage me, 2-5 stars rounded up to 3.

[Georgia Nicholls]

the most self-indulgent, pretentious book i have EVER read. and so incredibly male; i may as well have picked up something by bukowski. i never felt like i had any sense of the characters. i was reading through a murky fish bowl or something because the author would rather be all fluffy with his writing than actually show anything.

[Jemma Bartholomew · Rating 1 out of 5]

I gave it a good shot but this was a DNF, really not my cup of tea.

CNBC notes - both the main characters are older and childless by choice, the man has young adult stepchildren. From the 80ish pages that I read, there are unlikely to be any miracle pregnancies and much in the way of parenting and motherhood.

[Neville Filar · Rating 5 out of 5]

His Finest Hour.

I've read everything Jacobson has published and loved it all. But this book is on another level imo. A sensational and sensationally well written love story that left me both enriched and at the same time heartbroken.

[Claire · Rating 3 out of 5]

Really struggled to get into this and nearly gave up several times, it feels like it's far too wordy for the story it is telling which makes it's slow and difficult to follow at times. The last 40% brought it back a little and the story itself was believable but just not a book for me overall!

[Andy Cochrane · Rating 4 out of 5]

A cerebral story of a love affair that started with a kerpow and ended with a poem. A little self-indulgent at times but so were Lily and Quaid. Had to look up some of the words, but that's partly why I enjoy reading

[Becky M · Rating 2 out of 5]

I picked this up because I liked the premise of a love story that doesn't end as soon as the couple get together. However, the writing is so convoluted and trying so hard to be clever that I almost didn't finish it out of frustration

[Catherine · Rating 3 out of 5]

Very pretentious, had to be written by a man. And he’s from Manchester (disappointing,) will have to try his Booker one now to see if it’s any better!

[Caren · Rating 1 out of 5]

(DNF) This was my 2nd attempt to make some sense out of this novel. I stopped at page 46, frustrated that I'd wasted my time. At least most readers agreed with me.