This title brings back important memories from a great and terrible time...
My cellmate wanted to order a copy of Put ‘Em Down, Take ‘Em Out! Knife Fighting Techniques From Folsom Prison but I was able to talk him out of it.
Good thing, too, because the publisher’s catalog through which the order would’ve been placed belonged to me, and it was high contraband. Back then I was a maximum security prison inmate, in possession of several such catalogs. Most offered titles on everything from document falsification to improvised explosives; from contingency cannibalism (my favorite) to how to dispose of a dead body. I remember having the sense I’d exceeded the natural encyclopedia of criminal knowledge around me as a result, and that was nothing short of cross-eyed fabulous.
Each catalog entry was accompanied by a book-jacket photo and lengthy summary. Reading snippets of these out loud to certain trusted inmates caused laughter so physically enfeebling that only a death rattle was left in the human body’s big bag of tricks.
Put ‘Em Down was our favorite.
It seems crazy to recall being rendered sightless by tears of joy in the company of murderers, shot-callers, and stone-hearted life termers. But these “moments of genuine whimsy” were what my own prison survival was made of.
Sure, I’d read the titles and descriptions in a funny voice, but I allowed the absurdity of it all to do the heavy lifting. We didn’t actually need to possess the instructions for do-it-yourself blowguns; picturing blowgun wars in the chow hall was priceless enough. We'd really lose it when some badass piped up to correct, clarify, or corroborate. Such sessions turned tall tales into skyscrapers.
To me, Put ‘Em Down, Take ‘Em Out! definitely counts as a prison survival book, despite its sensationalized premise and author Don Pentecost’s intended civilian audience.
The man struck gold with that godless title, and all these years later, it’s hard to find even a worn copy for less than $80. Reviewers seem to take the book pretty seriously too, which, as you may expect, I find impossible. In my world, Put ‘Em Down will always represent learning -- early on -- that nobody behind bars will watch your back like a guy you can make cry with laughter.
There are other knife fighting and prison-inspired survival guides out there, of course, but none as rich with unintentional –alarmist– humor as Put ‘Em Down, Take ‘Em Out!
As for the quality of the techniques described therein – ha! Who cares? In the civilian world I find its value heightened tenfold. During holidays it's a gift that keeps on giving, trust me on that one. It's the best paperback ever to leave around for guests (or your mom) to find. With that in mind, who cares whether or not the techniques described within really deliver?
I'm recommending this book because it helped me "survive" in ways its author could probably never have imagined.