The Goodbye Year: Wisdom and Culinary Therapy to Survive Your Child's Senior Year of High School

by Toni Piccinini

For many mothers, a child's senior year brings about a serious look back on the past eighteen. Every event—from Halloween to Mother's Day—becomes The Last Time. Toni Piccinini knows exactly what that's like, and in The Goodbye Year , she offers the loving support every soon-to-be Empty Nester needs.  Think of Toni as your bossy-but-loving Italian auntie, with modern sensibilities and a packed pantry. With the wisdom she's acquired from saying goodbye three times to her own children, she reassuringly holds your hand while encouraging you through the insanity of the college application process, the rejections and the acceptances, and the teary dorm drop-offs. Even better, she reminds every mother that the best is yet to come—freedom, creativity, flexibility, and the Me Years.

Genres: Parenting

264 pages, Paperback

First published September 3, 2013

Reviews

[Kathleen Pooler · Rating 5 out of 5]

Author and Italian culinary expert Toni Piccinini presents a humorous and helpful guide for mothers sending their child to college in The Goodbye Year. Sharing her own personal experiences in journal–fashion, she addresses the “firsts of the last” in a month- by-month guide, starting with the summer before your child’s senior year in high school. At the end of each chapter she provides a recipe that correlates with the experience. For example, the first recipe Torta della Staglione (seasonal fruit torte) “is great as a dessert, a morning pastry or even late afternoon snack. Like the last summer, it’s all good.”

The combined storylines of her role as a mother and her role as an Italian culinary expert create an engaging and intriguing story structure. There is a story behind everything whether it be with her own children, the recipes or with colorful characters in her cooking classes. These stories converge to convey wisdom, humor and truth about the letting-go process as it relates to launching your child.

Striking a universal chord, she states “we all deal with the prospect of change—always inevitable, often unwanted—in different ways. Underlying the humor that often is present in her writing is the bittersweet process of letting go, a concept we can all relate to.

I found Picinini’s writing to be engaging and entertaining, Her recipes added another layer to the experience. “Just as you’ve lovingly nurtured your child, with this dish, you’ve carefully selected the best ingredients and brought out their unique flavor. Now all you have to do is put it on the back burner under a low flame and it will come together beautifully, just the way it’s meant to—the sauce and your child’s future.”

A delightful and uniquely creative guidebook for anyone who has ever had to send their child off to the next phase of life.

[Mike · Rating 1 out of 5]

This book wasn't for me and I mean that quite literally. This book was written specifically for upper middle class housewives with teenage children. If you're not that demographic, this is going to be lost on you. I knew this going in and if it wasn't for my book club, I wouldn't have picked it up in the first place.

[Crystal Otto · Rating 5 out of 5]

Book Review: The Goodbye Year by Toni Piccinini
By Crystal J. Casavant-Otto

The Goodbye Year is a great book for parents and non-parents alike. Even though the book focuses on a child’s senior year and those specific challenges, even a parent of young children or a non-parent can relate to loving, letting go, and the last time for something special. Piccinini offers love and support as well as some fabulous recipes. She is an encouraging friend who went from dreading those “lasts” to enjoying her own new-found freedom and flexibility. The optimism, support, and humor throughout The Goodbye Year drew me in and kept me interested through and through.

We’ve all been in a situation where we knew it was the end of something special. I remember that feeling the last day of first grade. While the other children were laughing and enjoying the celebratory picnic I was thinking how we would all have different teachers next year and things would never be the same again. I was not able to express the sorrow that came with that ending but as a child I just knew I was sad. Similar feelings came over me the last day of summer camp, the last day before my best friend moved away, and the last day of school each and every year. After reading The Goodbye Year I feel better equipped to lead my children through those ‘lasts’. I have to admit before I started reading I assumed this particular book wouldn’t apply to me since my children are just starting school, but I really have a lot of take-aways and would certainly recommend The Goodbye Year to anyone who has experienced love or loss of any kind.

Piccinini considers herself a bossy-but-loving Italian Auntie and that love shines through on each page. I felt her wrapping her arms around me with love and encouragement. She empowered me to try new recipes, enjoy little moments I would otherwise have missed, and somehow though we have never met, we have shared laughter. I hope Piccinini has a new project or two lined up because I look forward to reading more from her.

[Susan Inman · Rating 3 out of 5]

The beginning was a little rough. It jumped back and forth in time and I got a little lost. Once I got through that section, the book settled into a predictable format. I really liked the recipes. The stories about the cooking classes were really fun too. The ending would have been a more satisfying (to me) if it had given a more complete picture of where the author's life is now. What is she doing with her time and what has she discovered about herself since her children have all graduated? But despite all this, I liked the book and would give it to my girlfriends who have graduating children. In fact I think it's a good book for anyone going through a life transition - divorce, retirement, etc.

[Jeanne · Rating 2 out of 5]

I was definitely disappointed in this one. I do not enjoy cooking at all, so I probably should have read the subtitle more closely and avoided this book all together. I don't feel that it helped me prepare for my child's senior year at all, and I couldn't relate to the author who lives in Marin County. The women she talked about are very little like the women that I know.

[S · Rating 3 out of 5]

While I did enjoy the book & found some of the recommendations helpful, most of the recipes were beyond my skill level in the kitchen.