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Sexual Sanity
Sexual Sanity for Women Healing from Sexual and Relational Brokenness
Sexual Sanity for Women guides participants through the process of understanding why they struggle with destructive relational and sexual patterns and how the gospel brings change and a new way of living. Twenty lessons guide participants to understand God's good design for sexuality, the underlying reasons they struggle with sexual brokenness, and how the grace and truth of Jesus Christ can be applied to their struggles. Change begins as deeper heart issues are uncovered, and women learn that they are well-loved daughters of God who will find healing and wholeness as they live out God's Word in their relationships. This workbook is ideal for a one-on-one mentoring, college age student groups, and women's groups.
208 pages, Paperback
First published January 1, 2013
6 people are currently reading
147 people want to read
About the author
Ellen Mary Dykas
12 books6 followersEllen Dykas, MA, is the Women's Ministry Coordinator at Harvest USA and oversees their teaching and discipleship of women struggling with relational and sexual issues. She is a graduate of Covenant Seminary and has a graduate certificate in Biblical Counseling. In addition, she has over twenty years of experience in teaching and mentoring others through the Bible.
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Displaying 1 - 9 of 9 reviews
November 14, 2024
I read and discussed this with a group of women for work and that experience was a blessing. I mainly recommend this as a tool for a small group to discuss together. The insights from psychology and counseling were most impactful to me. I do think this book could be edited to not be as repetitive and to go deeper in areas that I think call for clarification to maximize the reader’s understanding and agreement. But overall I am thankful I read this book and have gained helpful knowledge, conviction, and confidence to discuss this topic with others.
March 13, 2013
God created mankind as sexual beings – both man and women. It is through our sexuality that we are able to fulfill part of the creation mandate to “be fruitful and multiply.” If we look at human sexuality within our world today we quickly realize that our sexuality is broken and marred. It is not as it should be. Sin has marred our sexuality and we carry it wherever we go. As sexual beings we rightly long for sex but we also realize that something is wrong, very wrong. In short, because of sin we are sexually insane.
There is no adult, teenager, and these days, almost no child, who has not been effected in a negative way in regards to their sexuality. From sexual abuse, unsolicited exposure to porn, to prostitution and porn addiction, every person’s sexuality has been affected by sin. We are all in some way touched by sexual sin and we are all in need of healing. One cannot get past the first book of the Bible without seeing the sexual sins of Gods people. Even king Solomon, in all his wisdom, was no match for sexual sins.
New Growth Press has recently published two resources for helping people deal with their sexual brokenness. Sexual Sanity of Men: Re-Creating Your Mind In A Crazy Culture by David White and Sexual Sanity for Women: Healing From Sexual & Relational Brokenness Ed. by Ellen Dykas are two workbook/devotional style books to help walk people through their sexual issues and bring the gospel of Jesus Christ to bear on their lives.
As White points out, “Sexual sin is an equal opportunity pathogen of the soul.” (SSM, p. 2) While the focus on sexual sins is more often focused on men, women struggle with it as well. Dykas writes, “Women are sexual beings just as much as men are. However, they often experience an even ‘louder silence’ regarding their sexual sin and temptation.” (SSW, p. 1) Both men and women need the gospel applied to their sexuality.
These books are written more so as workbooks. Both books follow a daily pattern with a few pages of content followed by reflection questions. SSM is broken into 4 sections over fourteen weeks with devotionals for five days each week. SSW has twenty weeks of material. While a person can go through the books alone, they are really designed to be worked through in small groups. SSW is especially designed for this as each weeks session is formatted like a Bible study lesson guide.
These books pull no punches in terms of their brutal honesty about the damaging effects of sexual sins, done to us and by us, on our sexuality. In the beginning of SSM White opens up with a jarring description of how sexual sin can destroy us,
"Sexual sin brings desolation. It promises excitement and pleasure, but delivers discontent and insatiable craving, often bringing ruin to God’s blessings: family, friendships, vocation, and health. It leads to an insane life." (p. 8)
As both books point out, sexual sins, like all sin, offer to the seeker things that it cannot deliver. There are many reasons why men and women run to sexual sins to fulfill but in the end find that they are right back where they started – wanting. But we would be remiss to think that these are just books telling us about the broken state our sexuality is in. No, these books walk the reader through the reality of their sexual insanity right into the sanity the gospel brings. SSW describes for us the hope the gospel brings to our broken sexuality,
"The Christian life is compared to a marathon – it is a race finished by someone who keeps a steady pace toward the finish line. Our journey of growth as women desiring to be like Jesus in our relationships and sexuality is a lot like running a marathon. We must persevere and beware of temptations to quit or get sidetracked. We will be encouraged as we run alongside others heading toward the same finish line. We will be enabled to endure as we set our hope in Christ, fixing our desires upon him. He is with us in the journey, and he will welcome us home when the race is done!" (p. 161)
Slowly and steadily the gospel will do its work in our lives in all areas including our sexuality.
Sexual Sanity for Men and Sexual Sanity for Women are just the kind of books the church needs to offer to God’s people. Though not to be replaced with professional counseling for those who may need it, these books present God’s good news of the gospel to the bad news of our sexual brokenness.
There is no one who these books are not for. These books are useful for anyone from the most sexually promiscuous to the prudish among God’s people. There is hope and there is healing for our sexual brokenness and these books show us the way.
NOTE: I received these books for free from New Growth Press in exchange for an honest review. I was under no obligation to provide a favorable review and the words and thoughts expressed are my own.
There is no adult, teenager, and these days, almost no child, who has not been effected in a negative way in regards to their sexuality. From sexual abuse, unsolicited exposure to porn, to prostitution and porn addiction, every person’s sexuality has been affected by sin. We are all in some way touched by sexual sin and we are all in need of healing. One cannot get past the first book of the Bible without seeing the sexual sins of Gods people. Even king Solomon, in all his wisdom, was no match for sexual sins.
New Growth Press has recently published two resources for helping people deal with their sexual brokenness. Sexual Sanity of Men: Re-Creating Your Mind In A Crazy Culture by David White and Sexual Sanity for Women: Healing From Sexual & Relational Brokenness Ed. by Ellen Dykas are two workbook/devotional style books to help walk people through their sexual issues and bring the gospel of Jesus Christ to bear on their lives.
As White points out, “Sexual sin is an equal opportunity pathogen of the soul.” (SSM, p. 2) While the focus on sexual sins is more often focused on men, women struggle with it as well. Dykas writes, “Women are sexual beings just as much as men are. However, they often experience an even ‘louder silence’ regarding their sexual sin and temptation.” (SSW, p. 1) Both men and women need the gospel applied to their sexuality.
These books are written more so as workbooks. Both books follow a daily pattern with a few pages of content followed by reflection questions. SSM is broken into 4 sections over fourteen weeks with devotionals for five days each week. SSW has twenty weeks of material. While a person can go through the books alone, they are really designed to be worked through in small groups. SSW is especially designed for this as each weeks session is formatted like a Bible study lesson guide.
These books pull no punches in terms of their brutal honesty about the damaging effects of sexual sins, done to us and by us, on our sexuality. In the beginning of SSM White opens up with a jarring description of how sexual sin can destroy us,
"Sexual sin brings desolation. It promises excitement and pleasure, but delivers discontent and insatiable craving, often bringing ruin to God’s blessings: family, friendships, vocation, and health. It leads to an insane life." (p. 8)
As both books point out, sexual sins, like all sin, offer to the seeker things that it cannot deliver. There are many reasons why men and women run to sexual sins to fulfill but in the end find that they are right back where they started – wanting. But we would be remiss to think that these are just books telling us about the broken state our sexuality is in. No, these books walk the reader through the reality of their sexual insanity right into the sanity the gospel brings. SSW describes for us the hope the gospel brings to our broken sexuality,
"The Christian life is compared to a marathon – it is a race finished by someone who keeps a steady pace toward the finish line. Our journey of growth as women desiring to be like Jesus in our relationships and sexuality is a lot like running a marathon. We must persevere and beware of temptations to quit or get sidetracked. We will be encouraged as we run alongside others heading toward the same finish line. We will be enabled to endure as we set our hope in Christ, fixing our desires upon him. He is with us in the journey, and he will welcome us home when the race is done!" (p. 161)
Slowly and steadily the gospel will do its work in our lives in all areas including our sexuality.
Sexual Sanity for Men and Sexual Sanity for Women are just the kind of books the church needs to offer to God’s people. Though not to be replaced with professional counseling for those who may need it, these books present God’s good news of the gospel to the bad news of our sexual brokenness.
There is no one who these books are not for. These books are useful for anyone from the most sexually promiscuous to the prudish among God’s people. There is hope and there is healing for our sexual brokenness and these books show us the way.
NOTE: I received these books for free from New Growth Press in exchange for an honest review. I was under no obligation to provide a favorable review and the words and thoughts expressed are my own.
July 13, 2019
Frankly, most pastors and Christian leaders don't often think of women having sexual brokenness. Much of the news and material out there focuses on the failings of men. So it was with pleasure I took of "Sexual Sanity for Women: Healing from Sexual and Relational Brokenness" by Ellen Mary Dykas, Women's Ministry Coordinator at Harvest USA. Harvest USA seeks to bring the truth and mercy of Jesus Christ to individuals and families affected by sexual struggles. One way is by providing resources that address biblical sexuality to individuals and churches. And this book is one important piece to that sexual puzzle! This softbound workbook of 208 pages equips ministry leaders and Christian women with some much needed tools toward that end.
"Sexual Sanity for Women" is a series of group sessions, supplemented by six appendices. The author uses an arboriculture (tree care) motif for each session. She addresses the female sexual sins, idolatry, traumatic pain, desires, looking for love in all the wrong places, gender, fantasies and ungodly thought-life, to name a few. Each session is outlined and ordered, with even suggested time-frames for every section (about and hour and forty minutes in total length). But the book is a workbook, so that each participant has plenty of room to write out answers and reflections to the questions everyone will be asked in the group. And to keep the meeting from wander from Dan to Beersheba, there is a stated "Key Concept" at the beginning of every discussion.
In the end, Dykas sees clearly what the issues are and how to proceed. "Many women who wrestle with their sexuality in sinful ways - including promiscuity, pornography, fantasy life, masturbation, and homosexuality - have other heart struggles as well. The Bible is clear that we all live out of our hearts, and yet our hearts have been impacted by living in a sinful world, where people sin against one another in traumatic ways" (2), but change is possible in Jesus Christ! And this book is put forth to help facilitate that change. I highly recommend the book.
My thanks to New Growth press for the free copy of the book used for this review. I asked, they happily handed my a copy without any expectations, other than my analysis. All of my evaluations are my own, freely made and freely given.
"Sexual Sanity for Women" is a series of group sessions, supplemented by six appendices. The author uses an arboriculture (tree care) motif for each session. She addresses the female sexual sins, idolatry, traumatic pain, desires, looking for love in all the wrong places, gender, fantasies and ungodly thought-life, to name a few. Each session is outlined and ordered, with even suggested time-frames for every section (about and hour and forty minutes in total length). But the book is a workbook, so that each participant has plenty of room to write out answers and reflections to the questions everyone will be asked in the group. And to keep the meeting from wander from Dan to Beersheba, there is a stated "Key Concept" at the beginning of every discussion.
In the end, Dykas sees clearly what the issues are and how to proceed. "Many women who wrestle with their sexuality in sinful ways - including promiscuity, pornography, fantasy life, masturbation, and homosexuality - have other heart struggles as well. The Bible is clear that we all live out of our hearts, and yet our hearts have been impacted by living in a sinful world, where people sin against one another in traumatic ways" (2), but change is possible in Jesus Christ! And this book is put forth to help facilitate that change. I highly recommend the book.
My thanks to New Growth press for the free copy of the book used for this review. I asked, they happily handed my a copy without any expectations, other than my analysis. All of my evaluations are my own, freely made and freely given.
September 30, 2024
lol forgot to shelve this book before! went through this book for young adult bible study this past spring. not sure if this counts as a read (and my rating may be unfair) since I missed some sessions and also skipped most of the personal reflection q's HAHA. overall it was a helpful book but I felt it got repetitive by the end, and I appreciate that it focused on the heart issues but it also lacked a bit in the more practical steps
June 30, 2023
Practical, straightforward, group workbook style. Filled with hope and insight and Gospel-rooted challenges to encourage women to honestly face, and boldly seek healing from, their own sexual brokenness and sin.
Would be best worked through in a small group setting, as it's intended to be.
Would be best worked through in a small group setting, as it's intended to be.
February 4, 2023
Excellent book that addresses the specific challenges women face when they are working through sexual sin.
November 13, 2024
YA group book
November 21, 2024
Very helpful for discussion groups and addressing sexual sin— and sin in general. If you are reading it on your own, I do not recommend
April 13, 2016
Sexual Sanity for Women is a powerful, gospel-centered, hope-filled study guide for women struggling with or embroiled in "destructive relational and sexual patterns." One may benefit from reading this book alone, but would find it even more helpful by participating in a small study group led by a competent woman able to keep the group on track and focused on the material in the book.
Goodreads doesn't have many reviews for this book so here are some links to reviews worth reading.
The Center for Gospel Culture: http://www.centerforgospelculture.org...
Covenant Eyes: http://www.covenanteyes.com/2013/07/1...
The Gospel Coalition: https://www.thegospelcoalition.org/ar...
Goodreads doesn't have many reviews for this book so here are some links to reviews worth reading.
The Center for Gospel Culture: http://www.centerforgospelculture.org...
Covenant Eyes: http://www.covenanteyes.com/2013/07/1...
The Gospel Coalition: https://www.thegospelcoalition.org/ar...
Displaying 1 - 9 of 9 reviews