God and You: Prayer as a Personal Relationship

by William A. Barry

This book describes what prayer can be when seen as a conscious relationship of a person with God. †

Genres: Spirituality, Religion, Christianity, Theology, Prayer, Nonfiction, Faith

83 pages, Paperback

First published December 12, 1987

About the author

William (Bill) Barry, a distinguished spiritual director and author, was born in Worchester, MA. He entered the Society of Jesus in 1950, studied philosophy in Germany from 1953 until 1956, and was at Weston College for theology studies from 1959 until 1963. Ordained a priest in 1962, Barry went on to earn a Ph.D. in clinical psychology from the University of Michigan in 1968.

In 1969, he began teaching psychology at Weston School of Theology, Cambridge, MA, and in 1971 was named director for the Center for Religious Development. He served in both capacities until 1978, when he was put in charge of formation for the New England Jesuit Province. Barry was the Assistant Director of Novices for the Province (1985-88) when he was named Rector of Boston College.

From 1991 to 1997, he served as Provincial of the New England Jesuits. Following that, he was named co-director of the Jesuit Tertianship Program. Barry directs retreats at Campion Center in Weston, MA.

Despite such a busy and committed life, Barry found the time to write 15 books, including The Practice of Spiritual Direction, God and You, Finding God in All Things, Spiritual Direction and the Encounter with God, Who Do You Say I Am?, With an Everlasting Love, and A Friendship Like No Other.

Barry has the rare ability to present complex spiritual issues in clear, well-written prose. He is one of the most influential Ignatian commentators at work today.

Reviews

[Rachel Wong · Rating 5 out of 5]

Fr. Barry’s book was recommended to me by my formator. It is a very thin book, which could certainly be read much quicker, but it definitely is advisable to take your time with it. Fr. Barry really breaks open the desire God has for a personal relationship with each of us, and the key to that is prayer. So he goes through a number of aspects of prayer that really flesh out what this looks like, all of which can and should come up in our prayer life as we discern God’s will for our lives. In doing so, I’ve found that my own prayer life has opened up and has become very rich. Fr. Barry writes beautifully and accessibly, and is very concise (hence the brevity of the book itself). A book I will certainly return to again and again.

[Joseph Streight · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is a pretty short read and is packed with great advice for prayer. Even though it’s such a short book, it did take me a while to read. Not because it was boring but just because I was reading other things as well. It worked out really well that I read something just as I was needing it in my prayer life whether it be anger at God or imaginative prayer. Overall, it was a great look at ways to grow in prayer life!

[Memory Mathema · Rating 3 out of 5]

I could have given this book a higher rating but somehow I felt like as I read it, the climax of the book and the depth of what he was explaining didn’t get the benefit of more pages. Most of the chapters are written like an article. Which I guess is intended to keep things simple. Some of the concepts described seemed to be over simplified. Bottom line , I was left wanting more. What do I take away from it... prayer is a conscious relationship of persons who are happy to enjoy each other’s company.

[Donna · Rating 4 out of 5]

A simple but profound discussion of being in a relationship with God and how to nurture communication in that relationship.

I like this author’s simple way of presenting his thoughts on being in friendship with God.

[Tim · Rating 5 out of 5]

A nice, simple little book about "prayer as a conscious relationship with God." As an experienced a spiritual director, Barry offers various tools and advice, such as considering what mental image we have of God, how to contemplate scripture, how to use our imagination and emotions.

[Riley Pearson · Rating 5 out of 5]

A wonderful introduction to various types of prayer.

[Ann · Rating 4 out of 5]

Excellent book on prayer. Easy to read yet full of depth.

[Dustin Bagby · Rating 4 out of 5]

A refreshing and recentering little book. Perfect book to accompany you on a retreat.

[Fabi · Rating 5 out of 5]

Totally reshaped how I think of spiritual exercises

[Cecilia · Rating 4 out of 5]

內容撮要 :

全書分十三章。

這本書強調在我們祈禱之先, 要先意識到自己與天主的關係, 即我們是衪所深愛的子女, 是如此親密相繫。只要留心體會天父在生活中的行動, 好引燃我們對衪臨在的渴望；這樣你就是在祈禱。而衪是全知全能的主, 衪不需要我們告知任何的訊息, 而衪在乎的是我們的感受與渴望, 我們是否願意向衪全然表露自己。

發展關係是相互的。 首先, 我們要去注意和認識這位看不見的、奧袐的天父； 其一方法, 可以藉「默觀」。 「默觀」可以是邀請天父與我們同在, 一起從事喜愛做的事； 可以是用感官去觀看、聆聽、嗅聞、品嚐、觸摸天父的創造, 與造物主本身相遇； 可以是閱讀聖經, 讓天父對我們說話，顯示真理。 此外, 我們可以運用多種想像力的方法與天父相遇, 這臨在的記號是會帶出正面的情感, 増加我們的信、望、愛。

而我們也要敞開心房, 讓天父知道我們的一切。唯有當我們坦誠相向, 包括我們的負面情緒, 關係才得以更親密, 和越加了解自己及對方。

我們可以祈求衪讓我們感受到衪的隨時臨在, 我們需要的是渴望互相聯繫, 並採取行動。 不論身在何處、任何時間、任何行動中都可以祈禱。 當祈禱開始經驗到與天主的關係, 便不再只是提出請求, 並期待最好的結果；則是傾訴感受、擔憂等。 如果我們仔細聆聽的話, 天父也會向我們披露衪的關切和看法, 讓我們更加認識衪。

祈禱對祈禱者確實有影響, 但這果效非祈禱的動機, 只是其副產品。 主要動機是認識天父對我們的愛, 然後我們昇起對天父的愛。




讀書心得:

此書十分強調禱告的目的, 是意識到天父與我們的關係, 這給我很大的提醒和鼓勵。
如書提出：若我們的禱告能真的只着重予與天父建立親密的關係；當我們深深體會這愛的關係, 正如我們與所愛的人相處, 我們便會以他/她的喜惡為出發點, 希望自己所作的可取悅對方, 而不再只是要求對方為自己付出; 並且會爭取時間與他/她相叙, 無所不談, 希望他/她知道自己的所思所想、喜惡、價值觀等等。

所以若我們想與天父的關係進入更深的層面,便要培養一種能力或習慣, 讓自己在工作或做其他日常事務時, 也能感受到天父的同在。而都市人常常以工作太忙為借口, 沒有時間與天父作溝通禱告, 實在我們確實要相信天父常常在我們身邊, 只是我們有否感受到衪的同在和邀請衪參與在生活中而已。

任何時間都可與衪交談和傾訴, 分享自己此事此刻的感受, 包括喜怒喪樂的情緒。 此外, 再加上睡前做一個簡短的省察, 注意當日自己意識到天父臨在的時候, 有那此情緒和想法, 在自省內體驗天父的同在, 尋求、聆聽和思考衪的旨意, 這便可助事情得以明白或解決, 情緒得以抒援。

雖然我們理性知道天父衪已知一切, 但很奇怪有時我們是不願意覺察到內心的某種情感或態度, 甚至不願意在天父面前承認這些情感和看法；其實這正是阻礙關係進展的最大絆腳石。當我們可向衪坦誠表達我的沮喪、生氣、或是情慾之類認為「惡」的事情, 而且承認我是無法靠自己驅開這些情緒. 我們便可對自己內心的情況更加敏銳, 更能令我們體驗到自己是個被愛、被饒恕的罪人； 越加了解天父對我們的接納和愛, 不管我們的本相如何。 這可助我們變得更能容忍自己的弱點和限制, 對別人不再那麼有成見。

直到我們體驗到基督信仰的基本真理, 天父深愛世人和耶穌是「為我」而死, 為了我的自私、過犯、視若無睹而死； 我們才能真正體會「耶穌是我們的救主」的意義。

[Susan · Rating 5 out of 5]

"God and You, Prayer as a Personal Relationship" is an amazing little book by William A. Barry, S.J. It is simple, basic, and profound. I read it one chapter at a time, with time to ponder and put into practice what I read. Fr. Barry has written a truly remarkable book that touched me deeply - it would not be exaggerating to say that it was life-changing. I have already given it as a gift. There are many different ways to approach prayer, I feel sure that the reader will connect with at least one of the ways Fr. Barry discusses. Highly recommend!

[Rachel · Rating 5 out of 5]

William A. Barry, S.J. is known as the person who most defined what we understand by "spiritual direction." Quite simply, he thinks of spiritual direction as assistance with prayer, and he thinks of prayer as a personal relationship to or communication with God. Barry's many books are accessible to a broad popular audience and yet are not hokey or contrived. Admittedly, the books do tend to repeat many of his key points numerous times, but there is always a different nuance or emphasis to consider that does make each of his books unique.

[Rick Sam · Rating 3 out of 5]

As a young believer, I would feel this deep sense of peace, so peaceful that nothing in the world would matter. Some Days, I would wonder what stopped me from experiencing the Lord?
This book definitely helped me to understand those weeks in my own life and more about Prayer.

[John · Rating 1 out of 5]

meditation,religion,nonfiction

[Christine]

Amazing book, both on spiritual direction and on one's relationship with others around him.

[Scott Robinson · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book is short, straightforward,and astute. My spiritual director recommended it to me, and I recommend it to anyone who wants to pray but feels thwarted.

[Bob Rice · Rating 5 out of 5]

I got some new thoughts about prayer. Very interesting.