Self-Care for Autistic People

by Megan Anna Neff

Ditch the stigma, stop masking, and put yourself first with these 100+ exercises that reinforce the idea that neurodiversity is a strength and teaches you how to relax, destress, find your community, practice self-love, and more.

When you’re autistic, it can be tough to prioritize wellness.

Self-Care for Autistic People can help you engage in some neurodivergent self-care—without pretending to be neurotypical. You’ll find more than 100 activities that help you accept yourself, destigmatize autism, find your community, and take care of your physical and mental health. You’ll find solutions for managing the challenging aspects of autism, as well as ideas to bring out the many positive aspects. With expert advice from therapist Megan A. Neff, this book will help you make the most of your life and your diagnosis.

Genres: Autistic Spectrum Disorder, Nonfiction, Self Help, Psychology, Mental Health, Disability, Audiobook

192 pages, Hardcover

First published March 19, 2024

About the author

Dr. Neff is a clinical psychologist, researcher, writer, and self-described accidental "Instagram Therapist" and content creator.

Reviews

[Anna · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is by far the best book on autism that I've read so far. Perhaps our shared identities of woman/late diagnosed/academic/AuDHD play into that but I agreed with every single point the author made and had developed 90%+ of the coping strategies she suggested already. Which sadly means she didn't have the miracle solution that suddenly will make life much easier for me, but of course I didn't expect it either.

For many people, these tips will create a long to do list, and some take much time and effort, but they are worth it. One step at a time.
Each topic would have benefitted from more detailed discussion, but this also would have made the book less accessible, so I think the author found a good balance. I especially appreciated the coverage of the difficulty that touch sensitivity can introduce to romantic/sexual relationships.

I have been looking for something that gives friends and family insights into my experience and why I handle some things unconventionally. This will be my go-to resource now.

[Anniek · Rating 4 out of 5]

I've seen reviews saying people adored this and found it really helpful, and reviews saying this was very basic info that they already knew. Personally, I'm kind of both? But I mean that in a good way.

I think this book would especially be a great resource for people who've only recently been diagnosed and are still figuring out how to accomodate themselves. While reading, I never felt like I was gaining a lot of new info, but it was also an empowering read because it made me realize how much of these things I was already doing. And I also found some helpful tips I want to implement more. I can definitely see myself revisiting this, because sometimes you just need visual reminders, even if you already know all the info.

[Hazel · Rating 5 out of 5]

A really fantastic book. I listened to the audiobook version, but I definitely want to get hold of a paper copy to refer back to. My autism diagnosis was less than two years ago in my early/mid-30s, so it was incredible to listen to this book and feel so seen and understood. The advice is considered and not at all condescending. Dr Neff uses her professional and personal lived experience to create a user-friendly, insightful resource that I think is going to be truly transformational for me and other autistic readers. I'm also going to ask my close support system to read this book, as I feel it will really help them understand a lot of my harder-to-articulate autistic experiences. Brilliant. 100% recommend.

[Elizabeth Lujano · Rating 3 out of 5]

This book had some very good, easy to read tips on self care for Autistic individuals. However, I really wish she would not have kept pushing non evidence backed professions such as nutritionists (instead of dieticians) or naturopath (instead of an MD). Also, I would have liked to see evidence and studies to back up her claims.

[Delaney · Rating 4 out of 5]

‘Most adults aren’t diagnosed until they’re suffering from severe autistic burnout’ 👁️👄👁️ oops…

Real talk: I really enjoyed this! You can never have too many tools in your toolbox for coping with a world not designed for neurodivergence. I appreciate how organized and neatly packed all the presented information is, and I hope to use multiple strategies that clicked with me. Sometimes you have to throw everything at the wall & see what sticks—Dr Megan Anna Neff really gets it!

[Hanna · Rating 4 out of 5]

You don’t need a diagnosis of autism - I don’t have one - to find the tips given in this book helpful, especially if you regularly struggle with things like sensory overload, burnout, or the general obstacles of an ever more complex and fast-paced life (thank you, capitalism!).
Of course, as with every self-help book, just reading (or in this case, listening) will not solve any problems; one has to implement the strategies provided.
One of these strategies is mindfulness, and Neff gives many examples of how to easily embed it into your daily life. Luckily for me, many of the strategies she describes are ones I started using years ago, and I can tell from experience that they absolutely help. Nevertheless, there are times when I need a reminder that they help, and this is where this book comes in very handy.

[Sarah · Rating 5 out of 5]

My boyfriend presented this to me the day after I got my diagnosis saying, ‘Now that it’s official, I thought this might be helpful’. He was totally right. I could identify with almost all of it and recognised many things I experience/do, some of those things I was consciously realising for the first time. I’ve read it through once (as I do sometimes find it hard to pinpoint what I need to focus on), but I found myself taking photos of pages I want to revisit soon. I found the information precise, straight-forward and presented in a way that made it very accessible. The way the book is organised makes it very easy to dip into and find the support/activities you need. I don’t think it’s necessarily providing any revolutionary techniques or information and I can imagine some finding it a little basic if they are further along on their autistic self-discovery journey. I think it’s invaluable to those who’ve recently been diagnosed but would also suggest it as a good visual reminder or checklist for people who may be more familiar with the techniques in the book already. I now hope I use it well as I do have the tendency to read about things that will be good for me but lack the ability/drive to implement what I’ve learned.🤔😬

[Katie Vee · Rating 5 out of 5]

After years of nervous system dysregulation (well, after a lifetime, but definitely a serious problem starting poatpartum) I feel this book was a Godsend with its practical explanations and actions to take. I'm looking forward to referring back to it and continuing to learn how to listen to my body's needs and finally take care of them. Recommended to anyone who is feeling burnt out and disconnected. It's practical and concise writing is perfect for times where you don't have energy to learn/take on new info.

[NrsKelley · Rating 4 out of 5]

A wonderfully informative book! I am the mother of two children living with autism. My oldest is 13 and really struggles with some of these self care acts! I am thrilled to have something that we can read together to make life easier for him!
I received an advance review copy for free, and I am leaving this review voluntarily.

[max theodore]

hey what does it mean if my therapist told me to read this one

[Luna Gerrits · Rating 5 out of 5]

Really helpful and interesting book. These self-care tips seem so good to me, and its nice to see them all combined in a book. As someone on the waitlist to get diagnosed, these tips really helped me and made me think about what i need. I also felt really seen. As a psychology student, this is just really interesting information about autism. It doesn't go too deep in the theory. it really is all about the advice.

What would also have been really helpful was perhaps a bit of a workbook section. E.g. the chapter on love languages, think about your own love languages, and write down examples. You could do this with a couple of different things. I noticed many parts saying "you should think hard about your preferences in this," etc. But then i just moved on reading, without thinking about it, lolol.

Its really good!

Thank you to netgalley and the author for sending me the book in exchange for an honest review

[Austin]

I think especially if someone were to just be starting to learn about autism and how to best care for their neurodivergency, this would be a very informative book; I took a few practical tips away from it and it's good practice to remind myself how I can best navigate my self and the world.

[Rebecca Brenner Graham · Rating 5 out of 5]

this book feels like a combination of a weighted blanket & a gently placed hot towel at a nail salon & a genuine conversation with a great friend & the clarity of a clear instruction & the protection of a workplace accommodation. it will likely be an annual re-read for me. overall, it beautifully synthesizes concepts & strategies that I’ve learned from other books & therapy to offer this concise & insightful read, which actually lives up to the genre title ‘self help.’ move over girlboss/hustle culture books of the twenty-teens and make way for working with your brain not against it.

[ツツ]

Many suggestions in this book felt practical and implementable. Compared to the audiobook, the physical book makes it easier to locate specific sections that you want to read or find useful, as well as to skip the intros and outros and many other transitional sentences.

book 18 of 2025, (8 /Mar)

[Alec Telemakhos · Rating 4 out of 5]

Loved that the chapters were short and well structured (straight to the point)

the overall topics discussed were cery informative and helpful (the work related ones a lil less if you work in retail but eh)

will definitely give the podcast a go

[Linn Fossdal · Rating 5 out of 5]

Incredibly helpful! I listened to the audiobook, and like others have said in their reviews, I will probably also get a paper copy to refer back to. Will definitely read this again!

[Stacey Longo · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is a great little book full of practical tips to help navigate life being autistic (though a lot is relevant to adhd too and the author is audhd). There’s a lot of basic things that most people have probably come across but you can skip over what isn’t relevant, and it’s also a good reminder of what you can try and may want to revisit. There’s also a few things that I’d never heard of before (cognitive reshuffling for one!) or explanations for strategies that I’d never understood or been willing to try in the past. Topics covered include; sensory needs, physical self care, burnout, emotional awareness and regulation, whether to self disclose, thought diffusion (ACT therapy), relationships (common differences in connecting, romantic relationships) and some workplace strategies and accomodations.

This is the perfect way to start thinking about how to make adjustments that support your neurodivergence. It’s brief, digestible (doesn’t read like a textbook) and positive, and I think many people would find it helpful!

[Sam Peeters · Rating 4 out of 5]

As an autistic reader, I felt immediately drawn to the title of this book. Self-care is a topic often discussed in broad, one-size-fits-all terms, but rarely is it tailored to the unique needs of autistic individuals. Megan Anna Neff bridges this gap with a guide that is not only practical and actionable but also deeply empathetic and validating.

What Makes This Book Stand Out?

The most striking aspect of Self-Care for Autistic People is how relatable it feels. From the first page, I felt seen and understood. Neff captures the challenges of navigating a world not designed for autistic people and offers concrete strategies to prioritize self-care without conforming to neurotypical expectations.

Neff’s key message—that self-care is essential, not optional—resonates deeply. Too often, autistic people are expected to push through challenges without considering their own limits. This book is a refreshing reminder that our needs matter and that taking care of ourselves is a powerful and necessary act.

Highlights from the Book

Unmasking: The Journey to Authenticity

Masking—hiding or modifying autistic traits to fit societal norms—is something many autistic individuals are familiar with, including me. Neff approaches this topic with compassion, offering actionable steps to reduce masking in safe and gradual ways. Her advice about creating supportive environments and nurturing authentic relationships felt empowering, making the idea of unmasking feel achievable rather than overwhelming.

Sensory Self-Care

As someone with heightened sensory sensitivities, the chapter on sensory self-care was a game-changer. Neff provides practical tips, such as using noise-cancelling headphones or weighted blankets, which many autistic people may already know. However, she goes further by encouraging readers to tailor their environments to their unique sensory needs. Inspired by her advice, I made small changes, like adjusting my workspace lighting, and it’s made a significant difference in my daily comfort.

Burnout: Recognizing and Recovering

Autistic burnout is a topic that often goes unrecognized or misunderstood, yet Neff addresses it head-on. She not only validates the experience but also offers tools to prevent and recover from burnout. Her emphasis on energy management and prioritizing rest hit close to home and gave me a renewed sense of agency over my well-being.

Mindfulness, Reimagined

I initially approached the mindfulness section with skepticism. Traditional mindfulness practices often feel inaccessible or ineffective for me, as they don’t align with my way of processing the world. Neff, however, presents adapted techniques that work for autistic minds. Her practical breathing exercises were easy to follow and have since become a regular part of my routine.

What I Took Away

The most valuable lesson from this book is its emphasis on acceptance. It doesn’t teach autistic readers how to "fit in" but instead empowers them to live authentically on their own terms. The self-care strategies Neff outlines aren’t quick fixes but foundational practices that encourage long-term well-being.

I also appreciated how the book acknowledges the diversity within the autistic community. Neff repeatedly reminds readers to experiment and choose what works best for them, which felt refreshing and inclusive. For me, this flexibility made the advice feel approachable rather than overwhelming.

Final Thoughts

Self-Care for Autistic People: 100+ Ways to Recharge, De-Stress, and Unmask! is a must-read for any autistic individual seeking to enhance their quality of life. It’s more than just a collection of tips—it’s a compassionate guide and a comforting reminder that self-care is a right, not a privilege.

For me, this book felt like a warm hug and a gentle nudge to prioritize myself without guilt. It’s a resource I’ll return to often, and I can’t recommend it enough to anyone looking to build a life of greater balance and authenticity.

[GONZA · Rating 4 out of 5]

Extremely interesting and along the lines of the latest research that now seeks to broaden the autism label by moving it to a spectrum of neurodiversity. Increasingly it is now seen that not all people on the spectrum look like Rayman, especially if they are female or BIPOC, so they are looking for commonalities that not only make diagnosis easier (because they include empathy and a normointelligence), but also can give simple strategies to avoid succumbing to any kind of overstimulation.

Estremamente interessante e sulla linea delle ultime ricerche che cercano ormai di ampliare l'etichetta dell'autismo spostandola su uno spettro di neurodiversitá. Sempre di piú ormai si é visto che non tutte le persone sullo spettro assomigliano a Rayman, specialmente se di sesso femminile o BIPOC, per questo si stanno cercando dei punti di contatto che rendano non solo piú facile la diagnosi (perché includono l'empatia e una normointelligenza), ma anche possano fornire delle semplici strategie per evitare di soccombere a qualsiasi tipo do sovrastimolazione.

I received from the Publisher a complimentary digital advanced review copy of the book in exchange for a honest review.

[alexander shay · Rating 4 out of 5]

A bit vague on some topics for specific strategies to use, but potentially helpful in most cases if you're new to your diagnosis and don't know where to start for helping yourself. I was disappointed, however, when the author's introduction explained how neurotypical techniques often don't work for autistic brains and how she has made these suggestions autistic-friendly, and yet many of the techniques provided (particularly in the first section) are identical to ones I've already come across that are not geared for autistic minds. I got a couple suggestions from this book, but they're mostly 'I know I should be doing this already I know it would help' and either energy or desire to do said thing is lacking. The 'get in touch with yourself to figure out your emotions' parts were particularly unhelpful for me, as the 'steps' did not get any more specific than 'pay attention to what your body is feeling' -- I experience all emotions in the same body manner, making it impossible to tell them apart, so this isn't helpful for me at all.

[Erin · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book covers so much about trying to navigate this world as an autistic person. The chapters include physical, emotional, mental, social, and professional self-care, as well as sensory safety. Each chapter is just a love letter to autistic pals and gives clear, tangible, low-spoon friendly ways to take care of our bodyminds.

I've been a longtime follower of Dr. Neff and her blog, and I use this book in my personal and professional life all the time. Does it have some basic stuff that you might already know? Yes, it definitely does. But does it serve as a helpful reminder when we've shot past burnout and not realized that we were even on that path? Yes, yes it does.

[alex · Rating 4 out of 5]

yay good

[❆ Ash ❆ (fable link in bio) · Rating 4 out of 5]

I’m not autistic but I think it gives great explanations and lessons to help understand autistic people.

[aimee · Rating 4 out of 5]

A lot of felt like information I knew already, but the section on navigating communication styles between different neurotypes was really helpful!

[Lianne · Rating 3 out of 5]

Format definitely made a difference here I think a physical book is needed.

Some good content but not a lot of depth on individual suggestions.

[Emma Durand · Rating 5 out of 5]

Accessible, practical and helpful. 10/10

[Yasmine Bogaert]

audiobook

[Emily Hardy · Rating 5 out of 5]

Life changing and affirming for a specific audience :)

[Tina H · Rating 5 out of 5]

Pleasantly compact little book filled with helpful tips and strategies

[Breanna · Rating 4 out of 5]

Super insightful! Going to re-read a physical copy in the future