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American Girls
A brilliant, deeply reported narrative about religious extremism, radicalization, and the bonds of the story of an American woman who traveled to ISIS-controlled Syria with her two children and extremist husband and the sister back home who worked tirelessly to help her escape.
Raised in a restrictive Jehovah’s Witness community in Arkansas, sisters Lori and Sam Sally spent their teens and twenties moving around the South and Midwest, working low-wage jobs and falling in and out of relationships. Caught in an eternal sibling rivalry—where younger, quieter Lori protected outgoing, reckless Sam—the two women eventually married a pair of brothers and settled down in Elkhart, Indiana, just around the corner from each other. And it was there that their lives totally diverged.
While Lori was ultimately able to leave her violent marriage, Sam was drawn deeper into hers—and deeper into the control of a husband who slowly radicalized, via the internet, into a jihadist. With their daughter and Sam’s child from a previous relationship, the couple moved to Raqqa, Syria, where Moussa fought for ISIS and Sam, who never even converted to Islam, attempted to survive and protect her children from airstrikes, extremist indoctrination, and the brutality of the ISIS system. In Raqqa, Sam’s oldest son appeared in several Islamic State propaganda videos, and she participated in ISIS’s practice of enslaving Yezidi women and children. Sam says her husband coerced her to move, but Lori—who quit her job and worked tirelessly to try get Sam out of Syria—isn’t so sure.
American Girls combines an in-depth examination of Sam and Lori's lives with on-the-ground reporting from Iraq, providing readers with a rare glimpse into the world of American women who join ISIS. Interweaving deeply reported narrative drama with expert analysis, the book explores how the subjugation and abuse experienced by women in the United States, women like Sam and Lori, are the same themes that enable the rise of patriarchal, extremist ideologies like the one espoused by ISIS.
Fascinating, resonant, and moving, American Girls is an unforgettable journey—from small-town Arkansas to Raqqa, from domestic abuse to a militant terrorist organization—all told through the extraordinary story of two close, complicated sisters.
Raised in a restrictive Jehovah’s Witness community in Arkansas, sisters Lori and Sam Sally spent their teens and twenties moving around the South and Midwest, working low-wage jobs and falling in and out of relationships. Caught in an eternal sibling rivalry—where younger, quieter Lori protected outgoing, reckless Sam—the two women eventually married a pair of brothers and settled down in Elkhart, Indiana, just around the corner from each other. And it was there that their lives totally diverged.
While Lori was ultimately able to leave her violent marriage, Sam was drawn deeper into hers—and deeper into the control of a husband who slowly radicalized, via the internet, into a jihadist. With their daughter and Sam’s child from a previous relationship, the couple moved to Raqqa, Syria, where Moussa fought for ISIS and Sam, who never even converted to Islam, attempted to survive and protect her children from airstrikes, extremist indoctrination, and the brutality of the ISIS system. In Raqqa, Sam’s oldest son appeared in several Islamic State propaganda videos, and she participated in ISIS’s practice of enslaving Yezidi women and children. Sam says her husband coerced her to move, but Lori—who quit her job and worked tirelessly to try get Sam out of Syria—isn’t so sure.
American Girls combines an in-depth examination of Sam and Lori's lives with on-the-ground reporting from Iraq, providing readers with a rare glimpse into the world of American women who join ISIS. Interweaving deeply reported narrative drama with expert analysis, the book explores how the subjugation and abuse experienced by women in the United States, women like Sam and Lori, are the same themes that enable the rise of patriarchal, extremist ideologies like the one espoused by ISIS.
Fascinating, resonant, and moving, American Girls is an unforgettable journey—from small-town Arkansas to Raqqa, from domestic abuse to a militant terrorist organization—all told through the extraordinary story of two close, complicated sisters.
352 pages, Hardcover
First published January 16, 2024
93 people are currently reading
5514 people want to read
About the author
Jessica Roy
2 books30 followersJessica Roy is a writer, editor and digital strategist who splits her time between Paris and the US. Previously, Jessica served as the Digital Director of ELLE Magazine, where she oversaw ELLE.com and wrote and edited stories primarily about entertainment, politics, culture and global issues. She also serves as an adjunct professor at New York University, where she teaches writing and editing for online platforms.
Jessica has over a decade of experience as a journalist, editor, copywriter and digital strategist. Previously Jessica was the News Editor of New York Magazine’s The Cut. She has also worked as the NewsFeed Editor of TIME Magazine and a Senior Editor at the New York Observer.
Jessica has over a decade of experience as a journalist, editor, copywriter and digital strategist. Previously Jessica was the News Editor of New York Magazine’s The Cut. She has also worked as the NewsFeed Editor of TIME Magazine and a Senior Editor at the New York Observer.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 145 reviews
November 13, 2023
I know I've been told that sister relationships can be complicated, but the story of the Sally sisters might have broken my brain. Jessica Roy's excellent American Girls tells the story of how older sister Sam ends up following her husband as he joins ISIS in the Middle East and how her younger sister Lori tries to bring her home.
If this were fiction, you would throw this book out the window halfway through for straining credulity. And yet, this is all true. Roy tells the story starting with their trauma filled childhood up to the present day. If Roy just told the most basic facts of the story then this would be very good book. However, Roy goes the extra mile and provides context around how trauma, money, and manipulation can lead down some very dark roads. I know when I read true crime, I often find the author isn't necessarily interested in the "why" of the story or they are convinced they know the answer and present it as fact. Roy threads this needle. She doesn't preach. She merely provides short glimpses of studies which can apply to the sister's actions but does not condone or excuse any of the decisions made in the story.
And some of these decisions are particularly mind-boggling. Roy is working with an unreliable narrator in at least one case and makes sure the reader is clear about what can be taken at face value and what can be taken with a mountain sized grain of salt. It's these specific instances where Roy's journalistic background becomes clear and it makes the story that much better. This is a great read.
(This book was provided as an advance copy by Netgalley and Scribner Books.)
If this were fiction, you would throw this book out the window halfway through for straining credulity. And yet, this is all true. Roy tells the story starting with their trauma filled childhood up to the present day. If Roy just told the most basic facts of the story then this would be very good book. However, Roy goes the extra mile and provides context around how trauma, money, and manipulation can lead down some very dark roads. I know when I read true crime, I often find the author isn't necessarily interested in the "why" of the story or they are convinced they know the answer and present it as fact. Roy threads this needle. She doesn't preach. She merely provides short glimpses of studies which can apply to the sister's actions but does not condone or excuse any of the decisions made in the story.
And some of these decisions are particularly mind-boggling. Roy is working with an unreliable narrator in at least one case and makes sure the reader is clear about what can be taken at face value and what can be taken with a mountain sized grain of salt. It's these specific instances where Roy's journalistic background becomes clear and it makes the story that much better. This is a great read.
(This book was provided as an advance copy by Netgalley and Scribner Books.)
January 30, 2024
In general this was an excellent work of investigative journalism. The story is fascinating, albeit tragic. My one complaint is that I think the author overreached with regard to the psychology of trauma and terrorism. I found myself getting irritated with her attempts to psychoanalyze people, some of whom she doesn’t appear to have met or spoken with personally, based on her limited understanding of a vast and complex scientific literature. She would have been well-advised to consult experts instead.
March 31, 2024
While I feel uncomfortable rating a memoir/autobiographical account of any individual’s traumatic experience, this story is not written by either of the sisters that suffered from loss, trauma, PTSD, and other ailments connected with their childhood experiences (and thus the poor decisions made on their parts to date violent men and make impulsive/naive decisions in their adult lives).
Therefore, I feel okay with giving this book a fairly average rating: 3.5 stars, rounded up from 3. It’s an extremely compelling story with intense personal experiences and relationships to explore, but often right when it seems maybe you’ll gain some valuable insight into why something happened the way it did, the book switches gears and veers off into another time period, another person, a different dynamic entirely.
Some reviewers have been critical of the overly dry and very lengthy “background” story we get on Sam and Lori Sally’s childhoods, and understandably so. We’re told that they have been raised in an extremely fundamentalist religious family, taught to be subordinate to men, taught what to do and what not to do, but not told why these things are good or bad.
I do believe that the comparison of Jehovah’s Witnesses to ISIS is a little bit extreme . I understand that it’s easy to sensationalize religions such as Jehovah’s Witnesses and Scientology to make them more alluring, more newsworthy to the public. Of course, it’s easy to do so when they aren’t as widely practiced or haven’t been around as long as say, Catholicism, Islam, Judaism. But I’ve known Witnesses as early on as the third grade, where I met two of my very best friends (twins) that I’m still in touch with today.
Not only that, but my former boyfriend (whom I maintain civility with for the time being) of fifteen years was once in the JW faith, as well as his entire family, so you could definitely say I’ve been around the religion or practitioners/non-practitioners of it long enough. It is true that they believe an Apocalypse is evident, that only 144,000 make it to heaven, that breaking rules results in excommunication and banned contact with the excommunicated individual (yes, even if it’s your family). I don’t know where Roy got the impression that it was once believed the Apocalypse could happen at any moment, because I’ve never heard this before.
Like all organized religion, I believe you choose the extent to how seriously you let it define you, and there’s a spectrum. The JWs I knew were certainly allowed to listen and engage in the same pop culture I was exposed to. While they may not have celebrated birthdays, they do, oddly enough, celebrate wedding anniversaries.
It seems to have become a lot more flexible over the years though, and instead of just blaming one religion for all of man’s problems, we should instead look at how man twists religion to justify his own behavior. If Roy can do it for Islam, she can do it for Witnesses as well. The ones I know are a far cry from terrorists, college-educated, and very practical in their thinking and decision-making. It didn’t seem fair to lump all current or past practitioners of this faith into a category of “damaged from childhood trauma” according to her experience with one family.
Roy -the journalist/author - also spends a lot of time (too much time!) educating readers on the “traumagenic framework” by two psychologists which supposedly has been the landmark study for society and professionals seeking to understand the effects that childhood sexual abuse has on later adult life and decision-making.
Roy goes into excruciating detail charting out the “ACEs” (adverse childhood experiences) often stopping in the middle of an important story to explain - in several lengthy pages - these experiences, studies, percentages, and other data that really feels out of place not just in the parts of the book it’s written in, but in the book itself. It’s all very common sense to just about everyone at this point.
For instance, I can imagine that most people are well-aware of the fact that witnessing or experiencing domestic or physical violence throughout their childhood makes them more likely to rationalize this as a normal, even acceptable behavior, as they become adults (really, it’s that obvious).
The author does paint a pretty fair portrait of both Sam and Lori and their rivalry as sisters, their series of bad decisions, culminating in the most shocking decision of them all and the reason for the book: older sister Sam’s marrying the Moussa, the younger brother of Lori’s Muslim husband (the erratic, drug addicted brother Lori had always complained to Lori about for the brief period the sisters were living separate lives in separate states) and the eventual progression of her husband’s watching of ISIS propaganda videos to his own radicalization and Moussa’s final decision (with Sam’s support, I believe) to permanently leave the US, cross into the Syrian border with Sam and their two children, to join ISIS.
It’s pretty obvious that Moussa, like many so-called “Muslims” is abusing the actual tenets of the Islamic faith to fit his own selfish agenda (getting rich, gaining power, feeling important to the cause, having women and children he could command to respect him - and beating them for any “reluctance to obey their husbands” - or just for the sheer hell of it). Why Sam or any other woman would ever believe ISIS might be an interesting place for them is beyond my comprehension.
I already am far more aware of Middle Eastern affairs than many, along with the history of the Islamic faith, the two split factions of Sunni and Shia Muslims, as well as the ISIS/ISIL agenda and radicalization processes. So all of that background information was very redundant to me. I feel that since the “War on Terror” here started, actually, that most Americans are likely to be familiar with the extreme propaganda and violence carried out by these terrorist forces.
That’s again, why I mention, that I’m simply lost when it comes to trying to understand how women believe there is anything for them to gain by going there - when their only purpose is to serve the men and to keep producing babies to “create more fighters for the cause.”
In the end, it still shocked me at just how unlikeable and selfish Sam came across. She comes across as unrepentant for her actions and the harm she’s caused others, focusing instead on her own traumatic experiences (which yes, she obviously was a victim as well, but to only see that side of it will result in her never learning from her mistakes). It’s also problematic that the book seems to promise answers to why these decisions were made, as well as how a complicated family/sister dynamic was resolved, yet… nothing.
I was eager to learn what had happened to Florian… was he really a smuggler, or a scam artist? But no further investigation is made into that matter. Even stranger, we don’t learn what ends up happening once Sam leaves with her kids while Abdelhadi (Moussa’s devoutly religious younger brother who was responsible for introducing the radical Islamic ideology to his brothers to begin with) is out.
We hear about his angry reaction at her taking the kids, all the money, possessions, etc., but we aren’t told whether he stayed behind in Syria, was captured by rebel-backed forces and extradited to the US for prosecution, whether he died taking one last stand for ISIS… just nothing.
Considering the two sisters are, for better or worse, tied to the Elhassani family, it seems strange that the author wouldn’t conclude with updates on members, especially given that they seemed eager to share their side of the story with her earlier on.
Very interesting subject matter, but it wasn’t followed up as much as it should have been, given the author’s straying from personal stories to cover statistical data on traumatic childhood experiences, ISIS indoctrination, and other areas that unfortunately didn’t help enrich the narrative. I’d recommend possibly as a quick read, but I also see there’s a 53:00 YouTube documentary on it. I’m going to try to watch that soon and hopefully, I’ll remember to post my thoughts on this review once/if I do.
P.S.: Feel free to skip the four paragraphs I wrote devoted to Jehovah’s Witnesses. I just didn’t feel it fair to present a one-sided argument to something in which the author appeared to possess incredibly limited knowledge/experience.
Therefore, I feel okay with giving this book a fairly average rating: 3.5 stars, rounded up from 3. It’s an extremely compelling story with intense personal experiences and relationships to explore, but often right when it seems maybe you’ll gain some valuable insight into why something happened the way it did, the book switches gears and veers off into another time period, another person, a different dynamic entirely.
Some reviewers have been critical of the overly dry and very lengthy “background” story we get on Sam and Lori Sally’s childhoods, and understandably so. We’re told that they have been raised in an extremely fundamentalist religious family, taught to be subordinate to men, taught what to do and what not to do, but not told why these things are good or bad.
I do believe that the comparison of Jehovah’s Witnesses to ISIS is a little bit extreme . I understand that it’s easy to sensationalize religions such as Jehovah’s Witnesses and Scientology to make them more alluring, more newsworthy to the public. Of course, it’s easy to do so when they aren’t as widely practiced or haven’t been around as long as say, Catholicism, Islam, Judaism. But I’ve known Witnesses as early on as the third grade, where I met two of my very best friends (twins) that I’m still in touch with today.
Not only that, but my former boyfriend (whom I maintain civility with for the time being) of fifteen years was once in the JW faith, as well as his entire family, so you could definitely say I’ve been around the religion or practitioners/non-practitioners of it long enough. It is true that they believe an Apocalypse is evident, that only 144,000 make it to heaven, that breaking rules results in excommunication and banned contact with the excommunicated individual (yes, even if it’s your family). I don’t know where Roy got the impression that it was once believed the Apocalypse could happen at any moment, because I’ve never heard this before.
Like all organized religion, I believe you choose the extent to how seriously you let it define you, and there’s a spectrum. The JWs I knew were certainly allowed to listen and engage in the same pop culture I was exposed to. While they may not have celebrated birthdays, they do, oddly enough, celebrate wedding anniversaries.
It seems to have become a lot more flexible over the years though, and instead of just blaming one religion for all of man’s problems, we should instead look at how man twists religion to justify his own behavior. If Roy can do it for Islam, she can do it for Witnesses as well. The ones I know are a far cry from terrorists, college-educated, and very practical in their thinking and decision-making. It didn’t seem fair to lump all current or past practitioners of this faith into a category of “damaged from childhood trauma” according to her experience with one family.
Roy -the journalist/author - also spends a lot of time (too much time!) educating readers on the “traumagenic framework” by two psychologists which supposedly has been the landmark study for society and professionals seeking to understand the effects that childhood sexual abuse has on later adult life and decision-making.
Roy goes into excruciating detail charting out the “ACEs” (adverse childhood experiences) often stopping in the middle of an important story to explain - in several lengthy pages - these experiences, studies, percentages, and other data that really feels out of place not just in the parts of the book it’s written in, but in the book itself. It’s all very common sense to just about everyone at this point.
For instance, I can imagine that most people are well-aware of the fact that witnessing or experiencing domestic or physical violence throughout their childhood makes them more likely to rationalize this as a normal, even acceptable behavior, as they become adults (really, it’s that obvious).
The author does paint a pretty fair portrait of both Sam and Lori and their rivalry as sisters, their series of bad decisions, culminating in the most shocking decision of them all and the reason for the book: older sister Sam’s marrying the Moussa, the younger brother of Lori’s Muslim husband (the erratic, drug addicted brother Lori had always complained to Lori about for the brief period the sisters were living separate lives in separate states) and the eventual progression of her husband’s watching of ISIS propaganda videos to his own radicalization and Moussa’s final decision (with Sam’s support, I believe) to permanently leave the US, cross into the Syrian border with Sam and their two children, to join ISIS.
It’s pretty obvious that Moussa, like many so-called “Muslims” is abusing the actual tenets of the Islamic faith to fit his own selfish agenda (getting rich, gaining power, feeling important to the cause, having women and children he could command to respect him - and beating them for any “reluctance to obey their husbands” - or just for the sheer hell of it). Why Sam or any other woman would ever believe ISIS might be an interesting place for them is beyond my comprehension.
I already am far more aware of Middle Eastern affairs than many, along with the history of the Islamic faith, the two split factions of Sunni and Shia Muslims, as well as the ISIS/ISIL agenda and radicalization processes. So all of that background information was very redundant to me. I feel that since the “War on Terror” here started, actually, that most Americans are likely to be familiar with the extreme propaganda and violence carried out by these terrorist forces.
That’s again, why I mention, that I’m simply lost when it comes to trying to understand how women believe there is anything for them to gain by going there - when their only purpose is to serve the men and to keep producing babies to “create more fighters for the cause.”
In the end, it still shocked me at just how unlikeable and selfish Sam came across. She comes across as unrepentant for her actions and the harm she’s caused others, focusing instead on her own traumatic experiences (which yes, she obviously was a victim as well, but to only see that side of it will result in her never learning from her mistakes). It’s also problematic that the book seems to promise answers to why these decisions were made, as well as how a complicated family/sister dynamic was resolved, yet… nothing.
I was eager to learn what had happened to Florian… was he really a smuggler, or a scam artist? But no further investigation is made into that matter. Even stranger, we don’t learn what ends up happening once Sam leaves with her kids while Abdelhadi (Moussa’s devoutly religious younger brother who was responsible for introducing the radical Islamic ideology to his brothers to begin with) is out.
We hear about his angry reaction at her taking the kids, all the money, possessions, etc., but we aren’t told whether he stayed behind in Syria, was captured by rebel-backed forces and extradited to the US for prosecution, whether he died taking one last stand for ISIS… just nothing.
Considering the two sisters are, for better or worse, tied to the Elhassani family, it seems strange that the author wouldn’t conclude with updates on members, especially given that they seemed eager to share their side of the story with her earlier on.
Very interesting subject matter, but it wasn’t followed up as much as it should have been, given the author’s straying from personal stories to cover statistical data on traumatic childhood experiences, ISIS indoctrination, and other areas that unfortunately didn’t help enrich the narrative. I’d recommend possibly as a quick read, but I also see there’s a 53:00 YouTube documentary on it. I’m going to try to watch that soon and hopefully, I’ll remember to post my thoughts on this review once/if I do.
P.S.: Feel free to skip the four paragraphs I wrote devoted to Jehovah’s Witnesses. I just didn’t feel it fair to present a one-sided argument to something in which the author appeared to possess incredibly limited knowledge/experience.
August 15, 2023
Jessica Roy has written a thriller of a non fiction account of two young women raised as Jehovah’s Witness in Arkansas, As teens, Lori and Sam Sally quickly escape from the strict religious upbringing and experience chaos and violence as they try to scrape out an existence.
Roy painstakingly details the steps and choices the sisters make until one finds herself following her radicalized husband down a rabbit hole leading to ISIS. Ultimately living without a country in terrorist camp in Syria. This is a story of every impoverished woman in some ways, and I urge you to read it. #Scribner #AmericanGirls #JessicaRoy
Roy painstakingly details the steps and choices the sisters make until one finds herself following her radicalized husband down a rabbit hole leading to ISIS. Ultimately living without a country in terrorist camp in Syria. This is a story of every impoverished woman in some ways, and I urge you to read it. #Scribner #AmericanGirls #JessicaRoy
January 24, 2024
Review to come
February 29, 2024
Listened to this as an audio book.
Probably 3.5 stars. Interesting and tragic story with some important parallels drawn between extreme religious views in any context. Also shows important arc of how early trauma and abuse can set up kids for a lifetime of unhealthy patterns (that is putting it mildly). One of the reviews I read thought this book could have been better by drawing some comparisons between the stories of religious extremism in this book (specifically Jehovah’s Witness to ISIS) to what is happening now with “Christian Nationalism” and Trump. This is never mentioned in the book despite the incredible timeliness of the topic.
Probably 3.5 stars. Interesting and tragic story with some important parallels drawn between extreme religious views in any context. Also shows important arc of how early trauma and abuse can set up kids for a lifetime of unhealthy patterns (that is putting it mildly). One of the reviews I read thought this book could have been better by drawing some comparisons between the stories of religious extremism in this book (specifically Jehovah’s Witness to ISIS) to what is happening now with “Christian Nationalism” and Trump. This is never mentioned in the book despite the incredible timeliness of the topic.
January 1, 2025
It feels like this book was written specifically for me in so many ways. It's a book about an American woman who left the US and went to Syria and joined ISIS (which is what I specifically researched for my graduate thesis, and I actually almost honed in on the case of Samantha herself but decided to focus instead on two other women who are mentioned in this book). Coincidentally, the main subject of the book (Samantha Sally) and her sister (Lori) both spent a lot of time in the South Bend/Elkhart metropolitan area, including around the time when I lived there. Oh, and also, they grew up in a small conservative religion. And on top of that, the entire book was an extremely interesting and compelling story that touches on the specifics of female agency, what it means to "choose" something when so many internal and external forces are weighing on you, and the disastrous consequences that can follow. I think this is an extremely tricky piece of modern history to write about, and the author does an excellent job at trying to see things from multiple angles, not assume motives or use gendered or racialized tropes to wave away the complexities of it all, and I found myself riveted from start to finish.
January 22, 2024
This was almost unbelievable. I cannot believe this actually happened, but it did, and it's terrifying.
The biggest thing this book showed to me was the power of religious control. These girls were controlled from birth with their parents being Jehovah's Witnesses, and even though they were "kicked out" or "disassociated" from the religion and their parents, it was already too late. The naivety that they possessed from being so controlled and dependent on the church for everything, even after disassociation since they had no clue about the world, plus the lack of parental involvement in their lives, coupled with no education, led them down a very dangerous path.
I think this book also did a good job of showing the progression of radicalization. It is so rampant and scary, and people need to know when it's happening, and when to run. Had Sam known her husband was being radicalized as it was happening, what that meant, and how dangerous it was, perhaps she could have saved herself and her children from serious trauma. No small child should be on an ISIS propaganda video. No small child should be "challenged" to take apart an AK47 in less than a minute. No small child should be taken willingly—yes, I believe Sam knew exactly what she was doing when she followed her husband into Raqqa—into a war zone.
Anyway, minus one star because the first half of the book seemed to jump around in time a little and it made for a confusing timeline to try to keep straight in my head as a reader/listener.
The biggest thing this book showed to me was the power of religious control. These girls were controlled from birth with their parents being Jehovah's Witnesses, and even though they were "kicked out" or "disassociated" from the religion and their parents, it was already too late. The naivety that they possessed from being so controlled and dependent on the church for everything, even after disassociation since they had no clue about the world, plus the lack of parental involvement in their lives, coupled with no education, led them down a very dangerous path.
I think this book also did a good job of showing the progression of radicalization. It is so rampant and scary, and people need to know when it's happening, and when to run. Had Sam known her husband was being radicalized as it was happening, what that meant, and how dangerous it was, perhaps she could have saved herself and her children from serious trauma. No small child should be on an ISIS propaganda video. No small child should be "challenged" to take apart an AK47 in less than a minute. No small child should be taken willingly—yes, I believe Sam knew exactly what she was doing when she followed her husband into Raqqa—into a war zone.
Anyway, minus one star because the first half of the book seemed to jump around in time a little and it made for a confusing timeline to try to keep straight in my head as a reader/listener.
August 13, 2024
Wow, what a riveting read. It was very complex - with the sisters’ sibling dynamics, overcoming (and being swallowed) by adverse childhood experiences, and the entanglement of mental illness and being radicalized by terrorism and extreme beliefs. I found the parallels between the patriarchies of Jehovah’s Witnesses and Daesh/ISIS/radical Islam to be compelling. Ultimately, How one sister was able come out of poverty/abusive husband/no education - and the other became an ISIS bride - was that the former had therapy to deal with her trauma, and the latter sought trauma out. The investigative journalism in this book was fantastic and it painted a 360 picture of so many different complexities.
May 12, 2024
I can’t give it a true, perfect five stars bc i was really annoyed by the somewhat frequent discussion of the ways adverse childhood experiences could inform Lori and Sam’s behavior. I don’t think the author was using it to excuse Sam’s actions, but I do think the frequent mentions of ACE research was almost random and out of place. So it wasn’t flawless to me, but I really couldn’t put this down so it gets a 4.75 stars 🤪
Also Sam is literally just such a bad person??? Ignoring the fact that she literally joined ISIS, she still sucks tremendously and doesn’t deserve a sister like Lori.
Also Sam is literally just such a bad person??? Ignoring the fact that she literally joined ISIS, she still sucks tremendously and doesn’t deserve a sister like Lori.
December 29, 2024
Really really fascinating and well researched. A super interesting case highlighting the psychological effects of trauma and victimization...and what happens when someone who is a victim themselves commits a crime and endangers others.
April 14, 2024
This book was crazy. It seems so far fetched that a poor, uneducated woman from Arkansas would wind up moving to Syria and joining ISIS, but after reading the story it became far less shocking. So many small decisions in her life contributed to this outcome. And she lived through some horrible situations prior to ISIS: sexual and physical abuse, poverty, housing insecurity. But was she an innocent victim of extreme abuse or a knowing accomplice to jihadist terrorism? I still can’t quite decide.
January 15, 2024
Y'all. This is one of the toughest books I have ever read in my life. The horrors contained in these pages will never leave me. But I am so glad to have read this book.
I actually didn't know a lot about ISIS going into this. The horror stories, sure, but I missed a lot of the details about what made ISIS tick so I learned so much from this book. A lot of it was horrifying but it was a lot of good, necessary information. You can tell a lot of research went into this story.
My heart hurts so much for the Sally sisters and all they have been through. And I'm sure sharing this story again (and with the world) wasn't easy but I'm so glad they agreed to let the author tell their story. It's important to talk about these things. What both sisters went through (both in their childhood and even into their adulthood) was just unfathomable. No one should ever have to experience so much pain. But I'm so glad both sisters have found some peace and, hopefully, a better life.
So. This is an important story. I cannot even begin to tell you how glad I am to have read this book. It was a tough read and I definitely had to take breaks and read it around other things. I cried a lot and by the end was so numb, I had to just sit with what I'd read for a minute before I could function again. But. I recommend this book SO highly. Stories like this are so important. And this is one that needs to be read. Please, PLEASE pick this one up!!
Thank you to Scribner for both the arc and the gorgeous finished copy and for allowing me to read this in exchange for an honest review!
I actually didn't know a lot about ISIS going into this. The horror stories, sure, but I missed a lot of the details about what made ISIS tick so I learned so much from this book. A lot of it was horrifying but it was a lot of good, necessary information. You can tell a lot of research went into this story.
My heart hurts so much for the Sally sisters and all they have been through. And I'm sure sharing this story again (and with the world) wasn't easy but I'm so glad they agreed to let the author tell their story. It's important to talk about these things. What both sisters went through (both in their childhood and even into their adulthood) was just unfathomable. No one should ever have to experience so much pain. But I'm so glad both sisters have found some peace and, hopefully, a better life.
So. This is an important story. I cannot even begin to tell you how glad I am to have read this book. It was a tough read and I definitely had to take breaks and read it around other things. I cried a lot and by the end was so numb, I had to just sit with what I'd read for a minute before I could function again. But. I recommend this book SO highly. Stories like this are so important. And this is one that needs to be read. Please, PLEASE pick this one up!!
Thank you to Scribner for both the arc and the gorgeous finished copy and for allowing me to read this in exchange for an honest review!
January 26, 2024
I really wanted to like this book. The premise of finding out how an American gets brainwashed into joining ISIS and moves his family to a country at war, while his wife and children try to survive, and a sister works tirelessly to save her sister from this situation, sounded like a great book. I still think it's a story worth telling. I just don't think it's presented well.
The book starts out looking at the early life of sisters Lori and Sam. It explores their very rough upbringing, shining a light on the Jehovah’s Witness community they were raised in. I enjoyed the look into the religious aspect of their life. I think explaining their upbringing is very important to the story. But for me, it was explained in too many words.
There was also a lot of jumping around in the timeline and it was hard to follow. The transitions weren't well done. Sometimes I would have to go back and read something over again to try and figure out if we were talking about the present or some prior time. It was confusing to say the least.
I never made it past this look into their early lives to get to the meat of the story. Maybe the main story is told well, but I just couldn't make it through enough of the book to get there. I think some editing of the first part of the book would make a huge difference in readability. As it stands, it's hard to read and the pacing is very slow.
Thanks to NetGalley for an early copy of this book!
The book starts out looking at the early life of sisters Lori and Sam. It explores their very rough upbringing, shining a light on the Jehovah’s Witness community they were raised in. I enjoyed the look into the religious aspect of their life. I think explaining their upbringing is very important to the story. But for me, it was explained in too many words.
There was also a lot of jumping around in the timeline and it was hard to follow. The transitions weren't well done. Sometimes I would have to go back and read something over again to try and figure out if we were talking about the present or some prior time. It was confusing to say the least.
I never made it past this look into their early lives to get to the meat of the story. Maybe the main story is told well, but I just couldn't make it through enough of the book to get there. I think some editing of the first part of the book would make a huge difference in readability. As it stands, it's hard to read and the pacing is very slow.
Thanks to NetGalley for an early copy of this book!
January 5, 2024
This was a fascinating read and even more so because it is a true story. Roy did a great job researching it, explaining bias and motivation and the generational trauma of abuse. It reads like fiction, i.e. suspense and one can imagine a film version of it being produced. I thought the mixture of story and commentary was perfect and it is one of those books that is very difficult to put down until the very last page. It also sheds light on a part of the world that most of us aren't familiar with. It would be a very meaty choice for a book club as well.
Thank you to NetGalley for an advance copy of this book. I predict it will do very well.
Thank you to NetGalley for an advance copy of this book. I predict it will do very well.
February 25, 2024
Roy accomplished what she set out to do: tell a fascinating story of sisterhood and extremism and tell it thoughtfully. I thought the ending was a bit clumsy, but otherwise it was successful.
June 26, 2024
This was... Interesting? Fascinating in a dark sort of way? Gripping but horrible?
I don't know what I expected from this book but everything you could imagine from this type of book was there. The two sisters featured in the title suffered all kinds of sexual and physical abuse from a young age, in the US, and that was before I made it to the second half of the book where the elder sister went to Syria. I think I expected the violence there, and wasn't surprised about the human trafficking and horrific prisons but having the same kinds of things happening in the rural Midwest was shocking.
The writing style is vivid and skeptical--the author knows how to use words and uses them well, but she remains convinced that the elder sister should have received harsher penalties for her crimes (specifically claims of human trafficking which are denied by her and the victims) which kind of frustrated me.
Sum total: there's some really messed up people in the world, and having a traumatic childhood can really mess your life up. Don't read this book if you don't want to deal with the horror of that (I'm still debating between 1 and 2 stars).
I don't know what I expected from this book but everything you could imagine from this type of book was there. The two sisters featured in the title suffered all kinds of sexual and physical abuse from a young age, in the US, and that was before I made it to the second half of the book where the elder sister went to Syria. I think I expected the violence there, and wasn't surprised about the human trafficking and horrific prisons but having the same kinds of things happening in the rural Midwest was shocking.
The writing style is vivid and skeptical--the author knows how to use words and uses them well, but she remains convinced that the elder sister should have received harsher penalties for her crimes (specifically claims of human trafficking which are denied by her and the victims) which kind of frustrated me.
Sum total: there's some really messed up people in the world, and having a traumatic childhood can really mess your life up. Don't read this book if you don't want to deal with the horror of that (I'm still debating between 1 and 2 stars).
November 14, 2025
4 or 5 stars - crazy nonfiction story about two sisters raised in the Jehovahs Witness faith, one of which marries a Muslim man who is radicalized via the internet and the family moves to Syria to join the fight with Isis. Unique and mostly unprecedented story of an American woman living on the front lines with her four young children. Honestly a very heavy book with lots of abuse/violence (for children as well), but with an important message. Helped me better understand the reality of radicalization, the Boston marathon bombers, etc. Not a light read at all but worth it.
July 21, 2024
This was wild
January 4, 2025
lori is so much better than me because if i had upended my life to get my sister out of syria and she didn't even thank me, i would be LIVID.
June 1, 2024
I couldn’t put it down it took over my life for a day so for that 5 ⭐️ it was such a riveting story def recommend
May 22, 2024
Does an amazing job drawing a throughline from the sisters’ Jehovah’s Witness upbringing and the eventual outcomes of their adult lives.
August 6, 2024
Love the topic but the lives of Lori and Sam just don’t come to life all that well. And she sticks her political views in which are completely irrelevant to the story.
March 28, 2024
Intriguing story! Even after finishing the book, I truly have no idea what to make of the Sally sisters. Without giving spoilers, the epilogue of the book sums it up well - Sam lived life in a way that caused her to literally chase danger across the globe and back. What she says now about what happened to her overseas still does not check out for me, but I can see why someone would want to believe her. This book is well-written and Jessica's reporter style writing was very appropriate for this story.
I would have appreciated more info about Lori in the second half of the book, and it would have been nice to hear more on the governmental side of getting Sam home.
One major issue with this book is the premise. The insinuation that the Sally sisters were average American girls is misleading at best. The author knows that too, because at the end of the book she states that Sam really never had a chance and I agree with that. Stop reading here to avoid a couple mild spoilers. By the end of the book Sam has been:
- a Jehovah's Witness
- literally shunned by her parents for ceasing to be a Jehovah's Witness
- sexually abused and later raped
- estranged from her sister
- has given her first child up to the Jehovah's Witness parents who no longer talk to her
- a participant in fraudulent bank transactions in Hong Kong
- joined ISIS
- a participant in literal slave trade in Syria
ALL of those things were contributing factors in the long sad story that landed Sam where she is as of the book's release.
I would have appreciated more info about Lori in the second half of the book, and it would have been nice to hear more on the governmental side of getting Sam home.
One major issue with this book is the premise. The insinuation that the Sally sisters were average American girls is misleading at best. The author knows that too, because at the end of the book she states that Sam really never had a chance and I agree with that. Stop reading here to avoid a couple mild spoilers. By the end of the book Sam has been:
- a Jehovah's Witness
- literally shunned by her parents for ceasing to be a Jehovah's Witness
- sexually abused and later raped
- estranged from her sister
- has given her first child up to the Jehovah's Witness parents who no longer talk to her
- a participant in fraudulent bank transactions in Hong Kong
- joined ISIS
- a participant in literal slave trade in Syria
ALL of those things were contributing factors in the long sad story that landed Sam where she is as of the book's release.
July 19, 2024
Literally the worst book I have ever read. The timeline is a mess. The writing itself is absolutely terrible. There is nothing redeeming about this book. I believe it is likely a fascinating story, but this author has completely removed even a faint interest in my wanting to find out.This version is a hot mess. My 9th grader is a better writer than this. Do not bother with this- it’s an embarrassment to journalism.
April 10, 2024
The woman definitely knew she was joining ISIS.
June 26, 2024
In this morally complex and occasionally dark biographical memoir, Jessica Roy follows the story of sisters Sam and Lori Sally, their exploits, and their incredibly rough childhoods, young adulthoods, adulthoods, and relationships, eventually getting to the point when Sam’s husband takes her and their children to ISIS, where he (and Sam’s son) become indoctrinated and weaponized for the cause. This book deals with several dark, heavy, intense subjects, not least of which is ISIS, throughout the entire book, so trigger and content warnings abound. All a true story, Roy handles these hard topics well, attempting to give some benefit of the doubt to the sisters and their recollections of the narrative she covers in this book. While not a happy or enjoyable read, Roy deals with these topics and narratives in an appropriate way and presents the information in digestible, clear terms. Readers may not necessarily find joy in this book (given its subject material), but it is an important, though difficult, read for those who seek to understand indoctrination, terrorism, and the psychology behind long-term chronic abuse and abusive relationships (especially those that begin in childhood). Roy’s latest book is a powerful, heartbreaking, difficult read that remains, unfortunately, relevant throughout the twenty-first century.
Thanks to NetGalley and Scribner for the advance copy.
Thanks to NetGalley and Scribner for the advance copy.
February 10, 2024
“Sam moved to Syria and lived under ISIS. Lori didn’t. Even though it’s her older sister’s life that has the most obvious drama, Lori is perhaps the real anomaly: Despite her own history of physical and sexual abuse, she’s built a stable life for herself and her kids and is making a conscious decision to break free of the generational violence that contributed to Sam’s imprisonment."
The tale of two sisters with a history full of violence (physical and sexual) and trauma, one of them ended up joining ISIS with her husband and her children.
The author takes her time talking about Lori and Sam's whole lives, the way they were raised in a very religious and repressive environment, how they were failed when they were abused, how they kept ending up in abusive relationships... They made bad choices but some of those choices were kind of the only ones they could make.
Sam's story is complicated because she has a weird relationship with the truth making her a very unreliable narrator. But she's also proof that you can be both a criminal and a victim. She's mostly not likeable, and what makes her this way is the fact that her sister goes through the same things and yet managed to not make some decisions. Seeing their portrayal side by side makes her seem worse.
An incredibly interesting story, told with so much care and honesty
The tale of two sisters with a history full of violence (physical and sexual) and trauma, one of them ended up joining ISIS with her husband and her children.
The author takes her time talking about Lori and Sam's whole lives, the way they were raised in a very religious and repressive environment, how they were failed when they were abused, how they kept ending up in abusive relationships... They made bad choices but some of those choices were kind of the only ones they could make.
Sam's story is complicated because she has a weird relationship with the truth making her a very unreliable narrator. But she's also proof that you can be both a criminal and a victim. She's mostly not likeable, and what makes her this way is the fact that her sister goes through the same things and yet managed to not make some decisions. Seeing their portrayal side by side makes her seem worse.
An incredibly interesting story, told with so much care and honesty
March 20, 2024
My five star rating is not for the book alone; it is more for a package including the book, the Frontline documentary “Return From Isis”, and a number of articles that I found on-line. They all complement each other well. It feels like a case of the sum being more than the parts.
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