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Finding Himself #1
FINDING HIMSELF
The-Boy-Who-Almost-Died has to figure out what it means that he didn't. Harry's tumultuous 5th year at Hogwarts is Cedric's 7th and final. Bound together by shared trauma, both boys fall under Ministry suspicion ... Who is Cedric Diggory?
A Cedric Diggory Lives AU
A Cedric Diggory Lives AU
1841 pages, ebook
Published November 19, 2008
3 people are currently reading
93 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 13 of 13 reviews
December 10, 2022
I never before considered Cedric and Hermione together, but after this fic I definitely can see it! I also appreciated the author diving into Hufflepuff characteristics and strengths in a way that was sorely missing from the canon series.
November 6, 2022
What a journey! This was so well done.
4 stars
2 on the spice scale.
CW: miscarriage, death, torture.
4 stars
2 on the spice scale.
CW: miscarriage, death, torture.
September 11, 2021
This was perfect in many ways!
Wonderful characterization, great writing, interesting plot - it was in general following original book but at the same time had differences, that happened because of the event which made this AU happen. I really liked how realistic relationship between Cedric and Hermione looked, they did act like teens (which isn't what you always get, yes, I'm looking at you Silencio).
Unusual take on wizarding art played quite a big part in this fic, and I really liked this original idea.
This fic is definitely going to my shelf of favourites.
Wonderful characterization, great writing, interesting plot - it was in general following original book but at the same time had differences, that happened because of the event which made this AU happen. I really liked how realistic relationship between Cedric and Hermione looked, they did act like teens (which isn't what you always get, yes, I'm looking at you Silencio).
Unusual take on wizarding art played quite a big part in this fic, and I really liked this original idea.
This fic is definitely going to my shelf of favourites.
October 10, 2023
I wanted to like this. The plot was good, the premise of Cedric living and taking on the head boy role was great and interested me. However, I couldn’t get past how toxic his relationship with Hermione was. Cedric’s character was condescending, bitter, and at times he made it seem like he was a 30 year old dating a 15 year old with how he thought about their relationship (even though they’re only one year apart).
I could maybe get past him calling her an idiot & acting like she had no right to have thoughts different from his own if it didn’t end with a weird teen pregnancy/miscarriage. It was unnecessary and really made me feel weird reading it, like I was intruding on something I shouldn’t be involved in. It was so very odd to me that Hermione would accuse Cedric’s mother of trying to kill him via the painting? Like that isn’t her son? In general, both characters overreact to almost every plot point and there is never a real resolution, just anger and resentment swept under the rug to have a weird, kind of slut-shaming sex scene after. Overall I wish I liked it, but I can’t even finish the last few chapters.
I could maybe get past him calling her an idiot & acting like she had no right to have thoughts different from his own if it didn’t end with a weird teen pregnancy/miscarriage. It was unnecessary and really made me feel weird reading it, like I was intruding on something I shouldn’t be involved in. It was so very odd to me that Hermione would accuse Cedric’s mother of trying to kill him via the painting? Like that isn’t her son? In general, both characters overreact to almost every plot point and there is never a real resolution, just anger and resentment swept under the rug to have a weird, kind of slut-shaming sex scene after. Overall I wish I liked it, but I can’t even finish the last few chapters.
April 2, 2013
Let's face it. A great deal of fanfiction is rubbish. Especially when it involves major characters not dying and a complete and total change of cannon. However, this particular one is brilliantly done.
March 29, 2025
Finding Himself is technically impressive — the prose is clean, the pacing works, and the world-building is rich. But beneath all that polish lies a morally hollow core that the story refuses to confront.
Cedric and Hermione’s relationship begins as emotional cheating, and the fic knows it — Cedric admits it’s “cheating, plain and simple,” and then confesses he “just didn’t care.” Hermione enables it under the excuse of “just friendship,” even as she sneaks off with him and lies about it. At one point, she literally tells Harry, “You take Cho, I’ll take Cedric” — reducing people to romantic trade pieces. It’s cold, calculated, and deeply out-of-character for both of them.
Yes, Cho gets an apology. Yes, there’s gossip and fallout. But none of it matters. Cedric and Hermione face no real consequences — just a brief pause before they’re back to being admired, empowered, and conveniently excused. Their guilt is cosmetic. The story gestures at emotional complexity but never delivers.
And every time the tension builds? It gets swept under the rug with sex, sex, and more sex. No emotional reckoning. No earned resolution. Just a convenient fade-to-black until it’s all forgotten. It’s not growth — it’s evasion in well-written wrapping paper.
This fic claims to be about healing, integrity, and character. But it rewards betrayal, rewrites personalities to serve the ship, and treats remorse like a box to check off before moving on.
At this point, it would’ve been more dignified to let Cedric stay dead — because this version of him, stripped of integrity and consequence, is a disservice to the character we once admired.
If this is what “finding yourself” looks like, maybe they should’ve stayed lost.
Cedric and Hermione’s relationship begins as emotional cheating, and the fic knows it — Cedric admits it’s “cheating, plain and simple,” and then confesses he “just didn’t care.” Hermione enables it under the excuse of “just friendship,” even as she sneaks off with him and lies about it. At one point, she literally tells Harry, “You take Cho, I’ll take Cedric” — reducing people to romantic trade pieces. It’s cold, calculated, and deeply out-of-character for both of them.
Yes, Cho gets an apology. Yes, there’s gossip and fallout. But none of it matters. Cedric and Hermione face no real consequences — just a brief pause before they’re back to being admired, empowered, and conveniently excused. Their guilt is cosmetic. The story gestures at emotional complexity but never delivers.
And every time the tension builds? It gets swept under the rug with sex, sex, and more sex. No emotional reckoning. No earned resolution. Just a convenient fade-to-black until it’s all forgotten. It’s not growth — it’s evasion in well-written wrapping paper.
This fic claims to be about healing, integrity, and character. But it rewards betrayal, rewrites personalities to serve the ship, and treats remorse like a box to check off before moving on.
At this point, it would’ve been more dignified to let Cedric stay dead — because this version of him, stripped of integrity and consequence, is a disservice to the character we once admired.
If this is what “finding yourself” looks like, maybe they should’ve stayed lost.
April 3, 2025
I wanted to like Finding Himself. The writing is undeniably polished — poetic at times, confident in tone, and emotionally immersive. But beneath the elegant surface lies a hollow, hypocritical narrative that glorifies emotional betrayal, rewrites character morality, and tries to pass selfishness off as realism.
Cedric Diggory — a character canonically known for fairness, integrity, and emotional intelligence — is reduced to a passive, emotionally cheating mess. He knowingly strings Cho along while developing intimacy with Hermione, and when he finally admits it’s “cheating, plain and simple,” he also admits that he “just didn’t care.” And that’s exactly how the narrative treats it — with indifference.
Hermione, meanwhile, excuses their bond as “just friendship” while actively participating in secret meetings, romantic tension, and emotional dishonesty. Her suggestion to Harry — “you take Cho, I’ll take Cedric” — is treated as clever instead of callous. These characters are not flawed in a way that invites growth. They’re just rewarded for bad behavior, while Cho is discarded like emotional collateral.
Yes, they feel guilty. But that guilt never costs them anything. Not reputation. Not respect. Not even their romance. The story brushes off consequences and moves on, cushioning the fallout with sex scenes and slow-burn fluff as if that erases the damage done.
The worst part? The story pretends to be about integrity, healing, and personal growth — while actively excusing dishonesty and emotional cowardice.
If this is what “finding yourself” looks like, maybe they should’ve stayed lost.
--
this fic is ruining my life, lol i know, i have a problem, i wish i could oblivate this out of my brain and maybe i can finally rest
Cedric Diggory — a character canonically known for fairness, integrity, and emotional intelligence — is reduced to a passive, emotionally cheating mess. He knowingly strings Cho along while developing intimacy with Hermione, and when he finally admits it’s “cheating, plain and simple,” he also admits that he “just didn’t care.” And that’s exactly how the narrative treats it — with indifference.
Hermione, meanwhile, excuses their bond as “just friendship” while actively participating in secret meetings, romantic tension, and emotional dishonesty. Her suggestion to Harry — “you take Cho, I’ll take Cedric” — is treated as clever instead of callous. These characters are not flawed in a way that invites growth. They’re just rewarded for bad behavior, while Cho is discarded like emotional collateral.
Yes, they feel guilty. But that guilt never costs them anything. Not reputation. Not respect. Not even their romance. The story brushes off consequences and moves on, cushioning the fallout with sex scenes and slow-burn fluff as if that erases the damage done.
The worst part? The story pretends to be about integrity, healing, and personal growth — while actively excusing dishonesty and emotional cowardice.
If this is what “finding yourself” looks like, maybe they should’ve stayed lost.
--
this fic is ruining my life, lol i know, i have a problem, i wish i could oblivate this out of my brain and maybe i can finally rest
April 10, 2018
I read this as part of a personal book challenge, which included something in a genre that I usually avoid, so I asked a book community I'm in for some fan fiction recommendations.
I'll admit that I really never expected much of it, but it was surprisingly and delightfully well written and very engaging. It clearly helped to know the characters and the plot of the book it parallels but I think would hold up decently without that.
But two other things really make it stand out. First, it explores budding teen sexuality and sexual exploration in a way that is better than anything I remember reading. It had me a bit uncomfortable at first to read erotic scenes with a 16 year old girl, but it was realistic, empowering, and not remotely exploitive of her as a teen, a virgin, or as someone who ends up really enjoying what she is doing sexually (both alone and with her partner).
More than anything, I'm stunned at how well and how realistically the author portrays a character who is disabled and who has ongoing issues with pain management related to that disability. The author's depiction of this character makes me believe that they must be (or must be very close to) someone in this position, because I've never read anything that really gets it to that degree. As a person who has a chronic condition that can be very painful, it means so much to me to see this issue so well handled. Representation matters, a lot.
I'll admit that I really never expected much of it, but it was surprisingly and delightfully well written and very engaging. It clearly helped to know the characters and the plot of the book it parallels but I think would hold up decently without that.
But two other things really make it stand out. First, it explores budding teen sexuality and sexual exploration in a way that is better than anything I remember reading. It had me a bit uncomfortable at first to read erotic scenes with a 16 year old girl, but it was realistic, empowering, and not remotely exploitive of her as a teen, a virgin, or as someone who ends up really enjoying what she is doing sexually (both alone and with her partner).
More than anything, I'm stunned at how well and how realistically the author portrays a character who is disabled and who has ongoing issues with pain management related to that disability. The author's depiction of this character makes me believe that they must be (or must be very close to) someone in this position, because I've never read anything that really gets it to that degree. As a person who has a chronic condition that can be very painful, it means so much to me to see this issue so well handled. Representation matters, a lot.
November 11, 2019
One of the very best of the AU Harry Potter fan fictions.
February 25, 2020
Decent for fanfic, better representation of minorities than the original books.
Read
August 10, 2022My first fan fiction, yay!
April 9, 2016
This is one of my all time favorite HP FF stories. The characterizations are spot on and the story line diverges enough from the original that you know what is going to happen, but you don't know how. Love love love it! I wish she had finished up the sequel, but I'll take what I can get.
January 28, 2014
Yes, fanfiction. No, not automatically crap. Categories are not indicators of quality and these can only be found in the work itself. And this has quality.
Displaying 1 - 13 of 13 reviews