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If I Fall
Meg Calloway is at the edge.
Reeling from her parents' sudden divorce, fifteen-year old Meg has never felt more alone. Her father is about to marry a woman she can't stand and her mother's only companion is an endless supply of alcohol. When Aidan Westwood, an older boy at school, shows interest in her, she grabs on and doesn't let go, thinking he's exactly what she needs to help stem her loneliness and despair. She quickly learns that Aidan lives a darker, more dangerous life than she does and the more isolated she feels from her family, the more willing she is to step into Aidan's world.
As Meg drifts further from her friends, she tries to find comfort with a boy who is opening her eyes up to new things, none of them good. Will she listen to those around her who are warning her that she's headed down a path of self-destruction?
Or will she fall too far...too fast...too deep?
Reeling from her parents' sudden divorce, fifteen-year old Meg has never felt more alone. Her father is about to marry a woman she can't stand and her mother's only companion is an endless supply of alcohol. When Aidan Westwood, an older boy at school, shows interest in her, she grabs on and doesn't let go, thinking he's exactly what she needs to help stem her loneliness and despair. She quickly learns that Aidan lives a darker, more dangerous life than she does and the more isolated she feels from her family, the more willing she is to step into Aidan's world.
As Meg drifts further from her friends, she tries to find comfort with a boy who is opening her eyes up to new things, none of them good. Will she listen to those around her who are warning her that she's headed down a path of self-destruction?
Or will she fall too far...too fast...too deep?
254 pages, Kindle Edition
First published April 6, 2013
3 people are currently reading
699 people want to read
About the author
Anna Cruise
29 books462 followersAnna Cruise has been writing and drooling over boys since middle school. Lots of years have passed but some things never change...
Her novels include IT WAS YOU, IT WAS ME, IF I FALL, SET IN STONE and MAVERICK. Additional titles releasing during 2013 include a stand-alone NA, DOWN BY THE WATER and two untitled novels.
Her novels include IT WAS YOU, IT WAS ME, IF I FALL, SET IN STONE and MAVERICK. Additional titles releasing during 2013 include a stand-alone NA, DOWN BY THE WATER and two untitled novels.
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Displaying 1 - 26 of 26 reviews
June 23, 2013
Yeah, I don’t even think I can review this book.
Wait!
Don’t go!
I’ll tell you the five things I liked about it.
1.
2.
3.
4.
5. The ending. (it had one)
Questions?
Read
January 17, 2014I'd highly recommend that all teenage girls read this gritty portrayal of the dark sides of growing up. This is not a traditional YA love story. Look, we all love our fictional bad boys, but it's important that there are also stories out there that can show a bad boy for what he can be... a true loser. This isn't a story filled with romantic walks on the beach, while reforming the bad boy to be good enough for the good girl. This story is a dark, disturbing tale that moves in the opposite direction. Ms. Cruise describes just how easily the good girl can be brought down, and how difficult it is to rise against.
I'd fallen. Fallen hard. But not so far that I couldn't pick myself up.
Fifteen year old Meg Calloway's life has just been turned upside down. Her father's left the family for a younger woman. Her mother, in turn, has found solace only at the bottom of a bottle, falling into a depression so consuming that she can barely leave the house, let alone be any sort of mother to Meg.
After a night out with friends, Meg's not ready to return to the desolate place she once called home.
My thoughts drifted to what I knew waited for me at home. I thrived to think of something else but I couldn't. The memories sucked me back in. I couldn't go back there, to that suffocating place that reeked of misery, that threatened to swallow me whole.
Instead, she strolls down the beach until she comes across a group of seniors from her high school. Amongst them is Aidan, a charming, attractive, charismatic older boy who's instantly taken by Meg. Aidan quickly becomes an easy escape from Meg's less than desirable home life. Unfortunately, sweet, charming Aidan is the very definition of a wolf in sheep's clothing. As he leads Meg down a dark rabbit hole of drugs, alcohol, and sex, she begins to lose not only her friends, but herself.
You're never smiling. It would be one thing if you looked happy when you are with him. But every time I see you? You don't look very happy.
Despite her friends warnings and concern, Meg can't help being pulled further into Aidan's world of lies and deceit. Those close to her no longer recognize her as they attempt to make her see Aidan for who he really is, but she's resistant to their efforts.
I think I just wanted some attention. I was tired of being alone and feeling hurt all the time. And, with him, I didn't hurt anymore.
How far will she have to fall before it's late, and who, if anyone, will be there to catch her?
If I Fall was a very compelling story that showcases the effects that divorce can have on young teenagers, and highlights the dark path of peer pressure that they can easily fall into by means of escape. Ms. Cruise wrote a chilling portrayal on how easily young, impressionable teen girls can fall in with the wrong crowd when it seems as if everyone else in your life has give up on you. At the same time, it's also a story about strength, and overcoming the loss and loneliness that life can bestow upon us. It's a story about not giving up on those close to you, no matter how damaged they may become. This is a story about falling...and finding a way to stand back up.
*ARC provided by Ms. Cruise in exchange for an honest review.
I'd fallen. Fallen hard. But not so far that I couldn't pick myself up.
Fifteen year old Meg Calloway's life has just been turned upside down. Her father's left the family for a younger woman. Her mother, in turn, has found solace only at the bottom of a bottle, falling into a depression so consuming that she can barely leave the house, let alone be any sort of mother to Meg.
After a night out with friends, Meg's not ready to return to the desolate place she once called home.
My thoughts drifted to what I knew waited for me at home. I thrived to think of something else but I couldn't. The memories sucked me back in. I couldn't go back there, to that suffocating place that reeked of misery, that threatened to swallow me whole.
Instead, she strolls down the beach until she comes across a group of seniors from her high school. Amongst them is Aidan, a charming, attractive, charismatic older boy who's instantly taken by Meg. Aidan quickly becomes an easy escape from Meg's less than desirable home life. Unfortunately, sweet, charming Aidan is the very definition of a wolf in sheep's clothing. As he leads Meg down a dark rabbit hole of drugs, alcohol, and sex, she begins to lose not only her friends, but herself.
You're never smiling. It would be one thing if you looked happy when you are with him. But every time I see you? You don't look very happy.
Despite her friends warnings and concern, Meg can't help being pulled further into Aidan's world of lies and deceit. Those close to her no longer recognize her as they attempt to make her see Aidan for who he really is, but she's resistant to their efforts.
I think I just wanted some attention. I was tired of being alone and feeling hurt all the time. And, with him, I didn't hurt anymore.
How far will she have to fall before it's late, and who, if anyone, will be there to catch her?
If I Fall was a very compelling story that showcases the effects that divorce can have on young teenagers, and highlights the dark path of peer pressure that they can easily fall into by means of escape. Ms. Cruise wrote a chilling portrayal on how easily young, impressionable teen girls can fall in with the wrong crowd when it seems as if everyone else in your life has give up on you. At the same time, it's also a story about strength, and overcoming the loss and loneliness that life can bestow upon us. It's a story about not giving up on those close to you, no matter how damaged they may become. This is a story about falling...and finding a way to stand back up.
*ARC provided by Ms. Cruise in exchange for an honest review.
April 7, 2013
"I'd fallen. Fallen hard. But not so far that I couldn't pick myself up."
This book isn't really a love story! It is a story of survival and realisation! It's a story of letting go and forgiveness! There is romance in it but it is not the main focus of the story! The main focus is a girl trying to come to terms with changes in her life and trying to come to terms with how those changes are going to impact her life! I wasn't really sure if I was going to enjoy it as much as I did as the synopsis doesn't really mention a certain character in the book that changes the entire plot but as soon as I saw the cover for this book I fell in love with it! I knew that I was going to read this book just because of the cover! The plot of If I Fall was a little bit difficult for me to read! I mean there was this broken fifteen-year old girl who turned to drugs, sex and alcohol to try and ease the pain of her parents divorce and she used them to try and forget about everything! She drifted away from her real friends and started hanging out with drug takers instead! This book was an eye-opener and I loved that the author didn't downplay everything and instead she showed what some children do to rebel and what they do to try and forget about everything! It also showed what some children do if they go through something like their parents divorcing! The characters were written amazingly! Meg was the main character and I couldn't help but feel sorry for her! She went through a lot in this book and to be fifteen and to go through some of the things she did must have been so hard! I do think that maybe she acted a little harsh in the things that she did but children cope in different ways and it took Meg a while to realise that the way she was coping wasn't right! Aiden was the love interest of Meg and I didn't like him! It was him that got Meg to start taking drugs and drinking and having sex at fifteen and I instantly didn't like him! I knew that I wasn't going to like him from the description of him in the synopsis! Case on the other hand was such a sweetheart! I adored him! He had been through a lot as well but he had been through the exact same thing as Meg was going through so he was able to help Meg and make her realise that she needs to change and that Aidan was the bad influence on her! The other characters in this book were also amazing and they were all written well! This book is definitely a standalone as all the issues in it are resolved but I really wouldn't mind another book! I love the cover! It is stunning! Big thank you to Anna for an ARC of If I Fall!
This book isn't really a love story! It is a story of survival and realisation! It's a story of letting go and forgiveness! There is romance in it but it is not the main focus of the story! The main focus is a girl trying to come to terms with changes in her life and trying to come to terms with how those changes are going to impact her life! I wasn't really sure if I was going to enjoy it as much as I did as the synopsis doesn't really mention a certain character in the book that changes the entire plot but as soon as I saw the cover for this book I fell in love with it! I knew that I was going to read this book just because of the cover! The plot of If I Fall was a little bit difficult for me to read! I mean there was this broken fifteen-year old girl who turned to drugs, sex and alcohol to try and ease the pain of her parents divorce and she used them to try and forget about everything! She drifted away from her real friends and started hanging out with drug takers instead! This book was an eye-opener and I loved that the author didn't downplay everything and instead she showed what some children do to rebel and what they do to try and forget about everything! It also showed what some children do if they go through something like their parents divorcing! The characters were written amazingly! Meg was the main character and I couldn't help but feel sorry for her! She went through a lot in this book and to be fifteen and to go through some of the things she did must have been so hard! I do think that maybe she acted a little harsh in the things that she did but children cope in different ways and it took Meg a while to realise that the way she was coping wasn't right! Aiden was the love interest of Meg and I didn't like him! It was him that got Meg to start taking drugs and drinking and having sex at fifteen and I instantly didn't like him! I knew that I wasn't going to like him from the description of him in the synopsis! Case on the other hand was such a sweetheart! I adored him! He had been through a lot as well but he had been through the exact same thing as Meg was going through so he was able to help Meg and make her realise that she needs to change and that Aidan was the bad influence on her! The other characters in this book were also amazing and they were all written well! This book is definitely a standalone as all the issues in it are resolved but I really wouldn't mind another book! I love the cover! It is stunning! Big thank you to Anna for an ARC of If I Fall!
May 19, 2013
Title: If I Fall
Author: Anna Cruise
Pages: 322
Publication Date: April 6, 2013
Publisher: Mission Bay Publishing
The Basic Summary: After her parents' divorce, Megan's life completely falls apart. With no one there to help her pick up the pieces, Megan is left to put herself back together. Enter Aidan. He's the perfect boyfriend, he makes her laugh, he makes her feel beautiful, and most importantly, he's the only one that's there for Megan. As time goes on, Megan learns that Aidan isn't what he seems, and as she falls deeper into his lifestyle, she loses herself a little bit more. Can she save herself before she falls in too deep?
My Review: *frustrated sigh* If the author had handled this book differently, it could have been an amazing book, but she didn't, so it wasn't. I've dealt with divorce, so I know how horrible it feels when it happens. It feels like your entire world is falling out from under you, and everything you thought you knew about your life is wrong. Basically, you feel lost. Because of that, it was easy for Aidan to take advantage of Megan. That part I understand, what I don't understand, however, is how easily everyone in her life gave up on Megan.
After the divorce, Megan's mother falls into deep depression and alcoholism. What bothers me about her mother is that NO ONE in Megan's life really bothered to check on her mother or Megan for a few weeks. Her aunt came in once, made Megan's mother get dressed, figured they were fine, and took off. After that, it was a while before anyone checked again. Her Aunt Sara eventually came back, sent Megan's mother to get some help, and moved in with Megan, after Megan got into trouble with her father. Another thing that bothered me about the situation with Megan and her mother was that Megan didn't care about her mother. When she did bring her mother up, it was usually to bring attention to how fat her mother was. The way Megan talked about her mother was awful.
At the beginning of the book, Megan's friends were there to support her through the divorce, but once she started liking Aidan, they gave up on her. They were incredibly judgemental, an dthey didn't really listen to her or care about what she wanted. When Megan finally stopped hanging out with them and started hanging around Aidan and his friends, instead of trying to get Megan back and talk to her about it, her friends started calling her stupid and a slut. Great friends, huh? When my parents got divorced, I pretty much fell apart, and for a while, all I could do was cry. I'm sure I wasn't fun to be around, but my friends never abandoned me. In fact, they went out of their way to make sure that I knew that I was loved. At the beginning of the book, Cruise kept talking about how Megan and her friends were so close, and how they'd known each other for years, but that's not how they acted. If you've been best friends with someone since childhood, and you're very close, they don't abandon you when things get tough the way Megan's friends did. They just don't. I didn't believe in the bonds of their friendship because they weren't really there. We were told that they were there, but we never saw them for ourselves.
What bothered me a lot about Megan was how quickly she changed. I understand that she was lost, but seriously? One hour she's a good girl hanging out with her friends and just talking, and literally an hour later, she's drinking, lying to the police, and practically having sex in a car with a guy she doesn't know. I don't care who you are, or what happened. No one completely changes in an hour. From there, Megan just gets worse. After the car hookup, Megan goes out with Aidan (the random guy) again the next weekend, they go to a party, get drunk, and he rapes her. The rape itself pissed me the fuck off because the author didn't treat it like rape. Megan said No and Aidan covered her mouth and continued to have sex with her. Afterwards Aidan apologizes for taking her virginity, and she forgives him. She didn't tell him he raped her, she didn't get mad that he took something she didn't want to give. She just went "Well.. He did say sorry." and went home with Aidan and smoked weed and slept with him again. Megan's transformation from a good girl into a delinquent wasn't at all believable. Cruise rushed it too much, and the entire thing just felt forced. Even more annoying was how Megan transformed from a bad girl to a good girl in a span of minutes at the end of the book, and how everyone acted like her having sex WITHOUT PROTECTION, drinking, breaking things, lying, sneaking out, skipping school, not doing homework, failing her classes, and doing drugs just never happened. Sure she was grounded by her aunt, but her aunt didn't address any of the things that Meg did. It was just "You lied to me and went to a party with your boyfriend, so you're grounded now." After a conversation with Case during her grounding, Megan decided that Case was right and she needed to stop doing all of the bad things she was doing, so she just quit. No, just no. Megan didn't decide for HERSELF that what she was doing was wrong. Case told her, and she basically went "Case said it's wrong, so it must be!" and then changed herself. Megan never actually thought for herself throughout the entire book. She just did everything everyone told her, but Cruise wants us to believe that Meg is a strong character? No.
Aidan was a douche. There's no nice way to say it. He introduced Megan to alcohol, drugs, and unprotected sex, but Cruise never really tried to make him sound like a bad guy. He was constantly guilting Megan into doing things, and towards the end of the book, he even cheated on her. At the end when Megan tried to leave him, he turned all psycho-boyfriend and told her that "We're not over until I say we're over." This pissed me off too because instead of Megan telling someone about this, she pretty much just went "Eh. I'll try again later." If a guy you're dating tells you that he's refusing to let you leave him, that's a huge issue. That's not something that you just ignore.
The only person I liked was Case, because he was the only person who was actually consistently there for Megan through it all even though she didn't realize it until the end. The one thing I don't like about the relationship between Case and Megan, is how sudden it all was. For 90% of the book, Megan kept insisting that she was in love with Aidan, but at the end, she suddenly realizes she has deep feelings for Case, and that he has deep feelings for her, and they get together. The problem with this is that we didn't see them develop deep feelings for each other at all. Once again, we were just told that they care for each other. We never actually got to see them grow to care for each other.
Basically, Cruise created a plethora of issues for Megan to deal with in this book, but Megan didn't actually deal with them. Megan fucked around for 4/5 of the book, and for the last 1/5th, everything somehow resolved itself with little to no impact on Megan. It just wasn't realistic. If you do drugs, have sex MULTIPLE TIMES without ANY protection, drink, fail your classes, and lie to the people who trust you, there are going to be REAL consequences. Was she grounded? Yes. But considering all of the dangerous things Megan was doing, that consequence is completely unrealistic. If you have sex without condoms or birth control repeatedly, you're going to get pregnant. Megan and Aidan had sex without condoms for MONTHS, and nothing happened to her. No STDs, no pregnancy, nothing. She did a multitude of drugs, drank a ton of alcohol, made it sound like she was addicted (she was constantly talking about how she needed *insert substance here* to cope), but she was able to quit all of it cold turkey and never thought about it again. She ditched her classes, failed tests, failed to turn in homework, but somehow none of this was ever brought up again, and it sounds as if there were no consequences for her failing her sophomore year of high school. It just wasn't realistic.
My Overall Opinion: I didn't like this book. I don't think the author handled ANY of the issues she brought up in a good way, and the fact that Megan faced no consequences for all of the things she did that year just makes no sense. If you have unprotected sex, drink, do drugs, and fail school there are going to be consequences. I wouldn't recommend this book to anyone because it's just not a good book. In fact, it's awful.
Find this review and more at: Confessions of a Cover Hoarder
Author: Anna Cruise
Pages: 322
Publication Date: April 6, 2013
Publisher: Mission Bay Publishing
The Basic Summary: After her parents' divorce, Megan's life completely falls apart. With no one there to help her pick up the pieces, Megan is left to put herself back together. Enter Aidan. He's the perfect boyfriend, he makes her laugh, he makes her feel beautiful, and most importantly, he's the only one that's there for Megan. As time goes on, Megan learns that Aidan isn't what he seems, and as she falls deeper into his lifestyle, she loses herself a little bit more. Can she save herself before she falls in too deep?
My Review: *frustrated sigh* If the author had handled this book differently, it could have been an amazing book, but she didn't, so it wasn't. I've dealt with divorce, so I know how horrible it feels when it happens. It feels like your entire world is falling out from under you, and everything you thought you knew about your life is wrong. Basically, you feel lost. Because of that, it was easy for Aidan to take advantage of Megan. That part I understand, what I don't understand, however, is how easily everyone in her life gave up on Megan.
After the divorce, Megan's mother falls into deep depression and alcoholism. What bothers me about her mother is that NO ONE in Megan's life really bothered to check on her mother or Megan for a few weeks. Her aunt came in once, made Megan's mother get dressed, figured they were fine, and took off. After that, it was a while before anyone checked again. Her Aunt Sara eventually came back, sent Megan's mother to get some help, and moved in with Megan, after Megan got into trouble with her father. Another thing that bothered me about the situation with Megan and her mother was that Megan didn't care about her mother. When she did bring her mother up, it was usually to bring attention to how fat her mother was. The way Megan talked about her mother was awful.
At the beginning of the book, Megan's friends were there to support her through the divorce, but once she started liking Aidan, they gave up on her. They were incredibly judgemental, an dthey didn't really listen to her or care about what she wanted. When Megan finally stopped hanging out with them and started hanging around Aidan and his friends, instead of trying to get Megan back and talk to her about it, her friends started calling her stupid and a slut. Great friends, huh? When my parents got divorced, I pretty much fell apart, and for a while, all I could do was cry. I'm sure I wasn't fun to be around, but my friends never abandoned me. In fact, they went out of their way to make sure that I knew that I was loved. At the beginning of the book, Cruise kept talking about how Megan and her friends were so close, and how they'd known each other for years, but that's not how they acted. If you've been best friends with someone since childhood, and you're very close, they don't abandon you when things get tough the way Megan's friends did. They just don't. I didn't believe in the bonds of their friendship because they weren't really there. We were told that they were there, but we never saw them for ourselves.
What bothered me a lot about Megan was how quickly she changed. I understand that she was lost, but seriously? One hour she's a good girl hanging out with her friends and just talking, and literally an hour later, she's drinking, lying to the police, and practically having sex in a car with a guy she doesn't know. I don't care who you are, or what happened. No one completely changes in an hour. From there, Megan just gets worse. After the car hookup, Megan goes out with Aidan (the random guy) again the next weekend, they go to a party, get drunk, and he rapes her. The rape itself pissed me the fuck off because the author didn't treat it like rape. Megan said No and Aidan covered her mouth and continued to have sex with her. Afterwards Aidan apologizes for taking her virginity, and she forgives him. She didn't tell him he raped her, she didn't get mad that he took something she didn't want to give. She just went "Well.. He did say sorry." and went home with Aidan and smoked weed and slept with him again. Megan's transformation from a good girl into a delinquent wasn't at all believable. Cruise rushed it too much, and the entire thing just felt forced. Even more annoying was how Megan transformed from a bad girl to a good girl in a span of minutes at the end of the book, and how everyone acted like her having sex WITHOUT PROTECTION, drinking, breaking things, lying, sneaking out, skipping school, not doing homework, failing her classes, and doing drugs just never happened. Sure she was grounded by her aunt, but her aunt didn't address any of the things that Meg did. It was just "You lied to me and went to a party with your boyfriend, so you're grounded now." After a conversation with Case during her grounding, Megan decided that Case was right and she needed to stop doing all of the bad things she was doing, so she just quit. No, just no. Megan didn't decide for HERSELF that what she was doing was wrong. Case told her, and she basically went "Case said it's wrong, so it must be!" and then changed herself. Megan never actually thought for herself throughout the entire book. She just did everything everyone told her, but Cruise wants us to believe that Meg is a strong character? No.
Aidan was a douche. There's no nice way to say it. He introduced Megan to alcohol, drugs, and unprotected sex, but Cruise never really tried to make him sound like a bad guy. He was constantly guilting Megan into doing things, and towards the end of the book, he even cheated on her. At the end when Megan tried to leave him, he turned all psycho-boyfriend and told her that "We're not over until I say we're over." This pissed me off too because instead of Megan telling someone about this, she pretty much just went "Eh. I'll try again later." If a guy you're dating tells you that he's refusing to let you leave him, that's a huge issue. That's not something that you just ignore.
The only person I liked was Case, because he was the only person who was actually consistently there for Megan through it all even though she didn't realize it until the end. The one thing I don't like about the relationship between Case and Megan, is how sudden it all was. For 90% of the book, Megan kept insisting that she was in love with Aidan, but at the end, she suddenly realizes she has deep feelings for Case, and that he has deep feelings for her, and they get together. The problem with this is that we didn't see them develop deep feelings for each other at all. Once again, we were just told that they care for each other. We never actually got to see them grow to care for each other.
Basically, Cruise created a plethora of issues for Megan to deal with in this book, but Megan didn't actually deal with them. Megan fucked around for 4/5 of the book, and for the last 1/5th, everything somehow resolved itself with little to no impact on Megan. It just wasn't realistic. If you do drugs, have sex MULTIPLE TIMES without ANY protection, drink, fail your classes, and lie to the people who trust you, there are going to be REAL consequences. Was she grounded? Yes. But considering all of the dangerous things Megan was doing, that consequence is completely unrealistic. If you have sex without condoms or birth control repeatedly, you're going to get pregnant. Megan and Aidan had sex without condoms for MONTHS, and nothing happened to her. No STDs, no pregnancy, nothing. She did a multitude of drugs, drank a ton of alcohol, made it sound like she was addicted (she was constantly talking about how she needed *insert substance here* to cope), but she was able to quit all of it cold turkey and never thought about it again. She ditched her classes, failed tests, failed to turn in homework, but somehow none of this was ever brought up again, and it sounds as if there were no consequences for her failing her sophomore year of high school. It just wasn't realistic.
My Overall Opinion: I didn't like this book. I don't think the author handled ANY of the issues she brought up in a good way, and the fact that Megan faced no consequences for all of the things she did that year just makes no sense. If you have unprotected sex, drink, do drugs, and fail school there are going to be consequences. I wouldn't recommend this book to anyone because it's just not a good book. In fact, it's awful.
Find this review and more at: Confessions of a Cover Hoarder
April 15, 2013
If I Fall by Anna Cruise
Genre: Contemporary Fiction
Age Group: Young Adult
Release Date: April 6, 2013
Length: Full Length Novel
Format: via Kindle
Source: received from author for honest review
Review Date: April 15, 2013
Overall Rating: 4.5 stars
This is not a fairytale. It is real life.
I’d like to start by pointing out that this is not a romance per se, but much of the storyline surrounds a “love” story. It is more like a “fictional memoir” detailing a young high school girl dealing with her parents’ divorce. And she is struggling. Badly.
Megan is a high school sophomore, a good girl, with strait-laced friends, and a crumbling home life. She is heartbroken by her parents divorce and her father’s decision to remarry. She meets Aiden, a senior from her high school, and a real life bad boy while out one night. He is part of the “bad” crowd, smoking, drinking, and doing drugs regularly. Not long after they meet, they are a couple, and she is no longer a “good girl.”
Megan is vulnerable and Aiden is a predator. He uses Megan’s need to escape her homelife to his advantage every chance he gets. He is not the hot bad boy with a big heart underneath it all. He is just a hot bad boy, period. The kind that are in the real world. The kind a lot of girls, myself included, can relate to being with as a teenager. There was no happy ending coming from this type of guy, only heartbreak.
As their relationship progresses it deals with many heavy subjects: teenage rebellion, alcohol and drug use, consensual and nonconsensual sex, first love, and parental neglect. It is a brutally honest portrayal of a teenage girl without direction. She gets lost. But all hope is not gone. There is a boy that wants her to find herself again. Will she let him in? Or is it too late?
I highly recommend this book, especially for teens (high-school aged) and their parents. This is what every teenage girl faces without parental direction. This is real life.
~StacyHgg
Books Unhinged
bit.ly/BooksUnhinged
Genre: Contemporary Fiction
Age Group: Young Adult
Release Date: April 6, 2013
Length: Full Length Novel
Format: via Kindle
Source: received from author for honest review
Review Date: April 15, 2013
Overall Rating: 4.5 stars
This is not a fairytale. It is real life.
I’d like to start by pointing out that this is not a romance per se, but much of the storyline surrounds a “love” story. It is more like a “fictional memoir” detailing a young high school girl dealing with her parents’ divorce. And she is struggling. Badly.
Megan is a high school sophomore, a good girl, with strait-laced friends, and a crumbling home life. She is heartbroken by her parents divorce and her father’s decision to remarry. She meets Aiden, a senior from her high school, and a real life bad boy while out one night. He is part of the “bad” crowd, smoking, drinking, and doing drugs regularly. Not long after they meet, they are a couple, and she is no longer a “good girl.”
Megan is vulnerable and Aiden is a predator. He uses Megan’s need to escape her homelife to his advantage every chance he gets. He is not the hot bad boy with a big heart underneath it all. He is just a hot bad boy, period. The kind that are in the real world. The kind a lot of girls, myself included, can relate to being with as a teenager. There was no happy ending coming from this type of guy, only heartbreak.
As their relationship progresses it deals with many heavy subjects: teenage rebellion, alcohol and drug use, consensual and nonconsensual sex, first love, and parental neglect. It is a brutally honest portrayal of a teenage girl without direction. She gets lost. But all hope is not gone. There is a boy that wants her to find herself again. Will she let him in? Or is it too late?
I highly recommend this book, especially for teens (high-school aged) and their parents. This is what every teenage girl faces without parental direction. This is real life.
~StacyHgg
Books Unhinged
bit.ly/BooksUnhinged
April 16, 2013
Firstly, is this cover not just...WOW? Breathtaking? Stunning? I totally got cover-craze the moment my eyes latched on to this beauty!
I want to just start off by saying that I found If I Fall a hard book to read not physically, in fact I couldn't put in down, but emotionally, it was draining for me. Whether it be because I was anxious from start to finish while watching Megan make one poor decision after the next or because I know people that have been down these paths. What I can tell you, is that it certainly isn't because the writing wasn't completely enrapturing. Ms Cruise introduces us to a host of characters, some that you will find yourself loving and others that you will not. As I mentioned before, Megan makes some bad decisions (unprotected sex and driving with someone that's been drinking is just the tip of the iceberg) because she is having a tough time dealing with the cards she's been dealt at 16 years old. I simultaneously loved and hated her, but predominately, I was really really sad for her. Sad that she felt so unloved that she didn't expect more from life and from those that were supposed to love her. Sad that she did everything she knew was wrong, but couldn't find her way.
I wasn't good at change; I wasn't good at being accepting or forgiving. I wasn't good at being understanding, or thinking of anyone, really, but myself.
Megan's family dynamics are hard, and I found myself loving the portrayal in It was You (Cruise's first novel) as well. It seems she has the knack for immersing us in a story that is so normal that it actually is something that could be happening to you, your friend, or neighbour on any given day. It could be alcoholism, the breakdown of the family unit, or just getting in with the total wrong crowd.
My thoughts drifted to what I knew waited for me at home. I thrived to think of something else but I couldn't. The memories sucked me back in. I couldn't go back there, to that suffocating place that reeked of misery, that threatened to swallowed me whole.
I adored the friendship. By far my favorite part. From Aunt Sara to Case and Jada, those characters really moved me. And omg I want to talk about the kisses near the end. Oh.my.goddess. So sweet & sexy. Boy-oh-boy!
That writing on the wall? The writing that everyone else had been able to read except me? It was suddenly crystal clear.
I would absolutely recommend this book. The message it sent me about forgiveness, the importance of true friends and the possibility of poor decision making and those consequences were ones I will carry around with me. Well done Ms Cruise. I had totally & unreservedly become proud of the person Meg became in the last few chapters. She learnt. And grew. And became great.
I'd fallen. Fallen hard. But not so far that I couldn't pick myself up.
I want to just start off by saying that I found If I Fall a hard book to read not physically, in fact I couldn't put in down, but emotionally, it was draining for me. Whether it be because I was anxious from start to finish while watching Megan make one poor decision after the next or because I know people that have been down these paths. What I can tell you, is that it certainly isn't because the writing wasn't completely enrapturing. Ms Cruise introduces us to a host of characters, some that you will find yourself loving and others that you will not. As I mentioned before, Megan makes some bad decisions (unprotected sex and driving with someone that's been drinking is just the tip of the iceberg) because she is having a tough time dealing with the cards she's been dealt at 16 years old. I simultaneously loved and hated her, but predominately, I was really really sad for her. Sad that she felt so unloved that she didn't expect more from life and from those that were supposed to love her. Sad that she did everything she knew was wrong, but couldn't find her way.
I wasn't good at change; I wasn't good at being accepting or forgiving. I wasn't good at being understanding, or thinking of anyone, really, but myself.
Megan's family dynamics are hard, and I found myself loving the portrayal in It was You (Cruise's first novel) as well. It seems she has the knack for immersing us in a story that is so normal that it actually is something that could be happening to you, your friend, or neighbour on any given day. It could be alcoholism, the breakdown of the family unit, or just getting in with the total wrong crowd.
My thoughts drifted to what I knew waited for me at home. I thrived to think of something else but I couldn't. The memories sucked me back in. I couldn't go back there, to that suffocating place that reeked of misery, that threatened to swallowed me whole.
I adored the friendship. By far my favorite part. From Aunt Sara to Case and Jada, those characters really moved me. And omg I want to talk about the kisses near the end. Oh.my.goddess. So sweet & sexy. Boy-oh-boy!
That writing on the wall? The writing that everyone else had been able to read except me? It was suddenly crystal clear.
I would absolutely recommend this book. The message it sent me about forgiveness, the importance of true friends and the possibility of poor decision making and those consequences were ones I will carry around with me. Well done Ms Cruise. I had totally & unreservedly become proud of the person Meg became in the last few chapters. She learnt. And grew. And became great.
I'd fallen. Fallen hard. But not so far that I couldn't pick myself up.
April 29, 2013
Good Girls Beware......
That was....well, it was like staring at a car accident.
You know you should look away, it's just too gruesome to look at, but you just can't tear your eyes away.
'I didn't drink. I didn't smoke either, and I didn't make a habit of hanging out at bonfires with a group of strangers. But tonite was different. Any place was better than home. Even this. I pulled back the tab and brought the can to my lips...
I felt myself relax. My stomach was heavy, like I'd just swallowed a bowling ball, but I felt lighter than I had in ages. I tried to remember the sinking depression that had threatened to drown me only an hour earlier, but it had disappeared. I smiled for no reason, a wide grin that stretched across my face.'
And this is where the after school special-nightmare begins.
So many bad decisions were flying around in here, it made me glad I don't have a teenaged daughter. I mean, Aidan was like the poster-child for everything you should avoid in a guy wrapped up in a hott-seductive package. He is NOT your romance book bad-boy, he was just bad. Period. He knew exactly what he was doing, took complete advantage of Megan's innocence & vulnerability, but she was just too young, naive & depressed to see his attention for what it really was.
Her parents are recently divorced. Dad has remarried a pretty young thing & is too wrapped up in his new life to pay attention to what is going on. Mom is holed up in her room buried under her depression & booze completely ignoring everything around her. Left to her own devices & desperately seeking an escape from the pain in her life, she finds it in Aidan's sweet charm. Parties, alcohol, drugs, it all comes with him & his crowd, providing the escape she craves in a not-so-healthy way. The scene where she loses her virginity was just....awful. She loses herself in Aidan & all that comes with him, pulls away from her friends, falls behind in school, and no one seems to notice or care. It was disturbing & heartbreaking.
By the time her aunt steps in, she's already well on the path of destruction. With the help of her aunt & friends she finally starts to see the wrong turn her life has taken. But coming back from it all is easier said than done, especially when Aidan puts up an unexpected fight. I would recommend this book to everyone- mothers & daughters, separate or together, it doesn't matter. Just read. This. Book. So very real & utterly heartbreaking. Props to the author for going where most won't. And though the epilogue doesn't wrap everything up in a pretty little bow, this is the one instance where I'm totally okay with that. It stayed true to the rest of the book & I understood that. However, that doesn't mean I wouldn't like to know how Megan is doing ;)
That was....well, it was like staring at a car accident.
You know you should look away, it's just too gruesome to look at, but you just can't tear your eyes away.
'I didn't drink. I didn't smoke either, and I didn't make a habit of hanging out at bonfires with a group of strangers. But tonite was different. Any place was better than home. Even this. I pulled back the tab and brought the can to my lips...
I felt myself relax. My stomach was heavy, like I'd just swallowed a bowling ball, but I felt lighter than I had in ages. I tried to remember the sinking depression that had threatened to drown me only an hour earlier, but it had disappeared. I smiled for no reason, a wide grin that stretched across my face.'
And this is where the after school special-nightmare begins.
So many bad decisions were flying around in here, it made me glad I don't have a teenaged daughter. I mean, Aidan was like the poster-child for everything you should avoid in a guy wrapped up in a hott-seductive package. He is NOT your romance book bad-boy, he was just bad. Period. He knew exactly what he was doing, took complete advantage of Megan's innocence & vulnerability, but she was just too young, naive & depressed to see his attention for what it really was.
Her parents are recently divorced. Dad has remarried a pretty young thing & is too wrapped up in his new life to pay attention to what is going on. Mom is holed up in her room buried under her depression & booze completely ignoring everything around her. Left to her own devices & desperately seeking an escape from the pain in her life, she finds it in Aidan's sweet charm. Parties, alcohol, drugs, it all comes with him & his crowd, providing the escape she craves in a not-so-healthy way. The scene where she loses her virginity was just....awful. She loses herself in Aidan & all that comes with him, pulls away from her friends, falls behind in school, and no one seems to notice or care. It was disturbing & heartbreaking.
By the time her aunt steps in, she's already well on the path of destruction. With the help of her aunt & friends she finally starts to see the wrong turn her life has taken. But coming back from it all is easier said than done, especially when Aidan puts up an unexpected fight. I would recommend this book to everyone- mothers & daughters, separate or together, it doesn't matter. Just read. This. Book. So very real & utterly heartbreaking. Props to the author for going where most won't. And though the epilogue doesn't wrap everything up in a pretty little bow, this is the one instance where I'm totally okay with that. It stayed true to the rest of the book & I understood that. However, that doesn't mean I wouldn't like to know how Megan is doing ;)
July 14, 2015
Ms. Cruise wrote a solid, tight story that transported me right back to my high school days. I finished If I Fall last night and as much as I wanted to jump on here and post a review right away, I needed a moment to collect my thoughts. The book has an ending and not a cliffhanger (THANK YOU!) so instead of just wondering what would happen next I was able to think about the book I just read.
There is grit and substance in this book. It's real. Meg finds a rabbit hole and falls in head first. If you weren't Meg in high school, you knew her and if you didn't know her, you heard others whispering about her. If you want to know the dirty details that caused the whispering by the lockers, read this book!
Ms. Cruise did a fantastic job with the characters and the subject matter. I loved the dynamics of the friendships, Jada and Case, and the parental figures, especially Sara. This is mature YA, but it shouldn't be thrown in the genre pile with all the others. If I Fall is something different, wonderful and compelling.
Just a heads up:
Hold on tightly to your preferred reading device for Chapter 8 through the beginning of Chapter 10, and then let your hands relax and breathe normally.
I received an ARC from the author because she liked the review I posted for It Was You.
There is grit and substance in this book. It's real. Meg finds a rabbit hole and falls in head first. If you weren't Meg in high school, you knew her and if you didn't know her, you heard others whispering about her. If you want to know the dirty details that caused the whispering by the lockers, read this book!
Ms. Cruise did a fantastic job with the characters and the subject matter. I loved the dynamics of the friendships, Jada and Case, and the parental figures, especially Sara. This is mature YA, but it shouldn't be thrown in the genre pile with all the others. If I Fall is something different, wonderful and compelling.
Just a heads up:
Hold on tightly to your preferred reading device for Chapter 8 through the beginning of Chapter 10, and then let your hands relax and breathe normally.
I received an ARC from the author because she liked the review I posted for It Was You.
April 16, 2013
Firstly, is this cover not just...WOW? Breathtaking? Stunning? I totally got cover-craze the moment my eyes latched on to this beauty!
I want to just start off by saying that I found If I Fall a hard book to read not physically, in fact I couldn't put in down, but emotionally, it was draining for me. Whether it be because I was anxious from start to finish while watching Megan make one poor decision after the next or because I know people that have been down these paths. What I can tell you, is that it certainly isn't because the writing wasn't completely enrapturing. Ms Cruise introduces us to a host of characters, some that you will find yourself loving and others that you will not. As I mentioned before, Megan makes some bad decisions (unprotected sex and driving with someone that's been drinking is just the tip of the iceberg) because she is having a tough time dealing with the cards she's been dealt at 16 years old. I simultaneously loved and hated her, but predominately, I was really really sad for her. Sad that she felt so unloved that she didn't expect more from life and from those that were supposed to love her. Sad that she did everything she knew was wrong, but couldn't find her way.
I wasn't good at change; I wasn't good at being accepting or forgiving. I wasn't good at being understanding, or thinking of anyone, really, but myself.
Megan's family dynamics are hard, and I found myself loving the portrayal in It was You (Cruise's first novel) as well. It seems she has the knack for immersing us in a story that is so normal that it actually is something that could be happening to you, your friend, or neighbour on any given day. It could be alcoholism, the breakdown of the family unit, or just getting in with the total wrong crowd.
My thoughts drifted to what I knew waited for me at home. I thrived to think of something else but I couldn't. The memories sucked me back in. I couldn't go back there, to that suffocating place that reeked of misery, that threatened to swallowed me whole.
I adored the friendship. By far my favorite part. From Aunt Sara to Case and Jada, those characters really moved me. And omg I want to talk about the kisses near the end. Oh.my.goddess. So sweet & sexy. Boy-oh-boy!
That writing on the wall? The writing that everyone else had been able to read except me? It was suddenly crystal clear.
I would absolutely recommend this book. The message it sent me about forgiveness, the importance of true friends and the possibility of poor decision making and those consequences were ones I will carry around with me. Well done Ms Cruise. I had totally & unreservedly become proud of the person Meg became in the last few chapters. She learnt. And grew. And became great.
I'd fallen. Fallen hard. But not so far that I couldn't pick myself up.
I want to just start off by saying that I found If I Fall a hard book to read not physically, in fact I couldn't put in down, but emotionally, it was draining for me. Whether it be because I was anxious from start to finish while watching Megan make one poor decision after the next or because I know people that have been down these paths. What I can tell you, is that it certainly isn't because the writing wasn't completely enrapturing. Ms Cruise introduces us to a host of characters, some that you will find yourself loving and others that you will not. As I mentioned before, Megan makes some bad decisions (unprotected sex and driving with someone that's been drinking is just the tip of the iceberg) because she is having a tough time dealing with the cards she's been dealt at 16 years old. I simultaneously loved and hated her, but predominately, I was really really sad for her. Sad that she felt so unloved that she didn't expect more from life and from those that were supposed to love her. Sad that she did everything she knew was wrong, but couldn't find her way.
I wasn't good at change; I wasn't good at being accepting or forgiving. I wasn't good at being understanding, or thinking of anyone, really, but myself.
Megan's family dynamics are hard, and I found myself loving the portrayal in It was You (Cruise's first novel) as well. It seems she has the knack for immersing us in a story that is so normal that it actually is something that could be happening to you, your friend, or neighbour on any given day. It could be alcoholism, the breakdown of the family unit, or just getting in with the total wrong crowd.
My thoughts drifted to what I knew waited for me at home. I thrived to think of something else but I couldn't. The memories sucked me back in. I couldn't go back there, to that suffocating place that reeked of misery, that threatened to swallowed me whole.
I adored the friendship. By far my favorite part. From Aunt Sara to Case and Jada, those characters really moved me. And omg I want to talk about the kisses near the end. Oh.my.goddess. So sweet & sexy. Boy-oh-boy!
That writing on the wall? The writing that everyone else had been able to read except me? It was suddenly crystal clear.
I would absolutely recommend this book. The message it sent me about forgiveness, the importance of true friends and the possibility of poor decision making and those consequences were ones I will carry around with me. Well done Ms Cruise. I had totally & unreservedly become proud of the person Meg became in the last few chapters. She learnt. And grew. And became great.
I'd fallen. Fallen hard. But not so far that I couldn't pick myself up.
June 2, 2013
I was really impressed by If I Fall. I've been looking through some of the reviews and noticed that a lot of people have really harsh feelings about Megan. And yes, she definitely does grate on your nerves during the course of the book, but she's supposed to. I understand her actions because I don't think anyone can make educated decisions with no guidance and feeling completely alone.
Megan's downward spiral is sad as it is enlightening. I remember what it feels like to be 15 and just feel like no one in the world cares about you. You're growing up, things are changing; and for Megan she is going through a hell I couldn't even imagine.
Anna Cruise has created a really fantastic story about falling down, and trying so hard to get back up. I think that this book is a great example of showing people what can happen to kids who are kind of abandoned. The only minor complaint I have about If I Fall is Megan's dad. I felt like he was trying to be redeemed at one point, and it just fell flat. Especially after some of the crap he pulled on Megan. But, then again, that is purely something that just irked me, and someone else can have a completely different take on it.
Pick up If I Fall. It's definitely worth a read!
Megan's downward spiral is sad as it is enlightening. I remember what it feels like to be 15 and just feel like no one in the world cares about you. You're growing up, things are changing; and for Megan she is going through a hell I couldn't even imagine.
Anna Cruise has created a really fantastic story about falling down, and trying so hard to get back up. I think that this book is a great example of showing people what can happen to kids who are kind of abandoned. The only minor complaint I have about If I Fall is Megan's dad. I felt like he was trying to be redeemed at one point, and it just fell flat. Especially after some of the crap he pulled on Megan. But, then again, that is purely something that just irked me, and someone else can have a completely different take on it.
Pick up If I Fall. It's definitely worth a read!
August 16, 2013
Review Originally Posted at: Book Freak
Rating: 4.5
Megan never felt more alone and vulnerable when her parents filed for divorce, and her dad suddenly marries the real estate agent. Her mom was no longer herself, often drowns herself in alcohol, and Meg was left to fend for herself. So when the handsome and popular Aidan comes into her little world and charmed her, she was hooked.
He made her feel like she was the most important thing in the world. One by one she started ditching her friends, her class, her life. She knew it was wrong, but she couldn't seem to stop because Aidan makes her forget, her makes her feel alive. She will do anything to be with him, even if it means lying to everyone who cares for her.
Another book from Anna Cruise that I have read in one sitting, and this time, it was all about a girl who was lost after her family broke apart. I don't blame her, she was young, vulnerable and well, gullible. Her parents (figuratively) ditched her, and when someone makes you feel like a princess after feeling like crap - you hold on to that person even if it means he's your ride to self destruction. She's lucky that she has her aunt who was firm enough to lay grounds, a step mother who doesn't push herself in her life, and friends who really cares for her.
Aidan was charming, manipulative and an ass. I hated him since the night he got her drunk and took advantage of her. He treated her like she was a piece of meat, took her innocence in the most carnal and selfish way and gave her some crap to forget her problems.
I wished her friends were stronger in trying to make her see what Aidan really is, how wrong he is for her. But her conviction was strong, I couldn't blame her friends if they just stood in the sidelines, watching her waste her life. Yet, the moment she needed them, they were there, ready to lend a hand and bail her out. Especially Case, I love him! He's an amazing kid with a good head on his shoulders than his pants. He's responsible, and never judged her. He listened to her, picks her up when she calls him, and silently waited for her until can finally come into her senses and see reality.
If I Fall is a fantastic read. I love the plot, the pacing, the characters in it (except for Aidan obviously). This was a story about a girl's journey - her ups and downs, how her life turned into an almost-nightmare but was saved right in time by people who cared about her the most. Sometimes when you thought you have lost everything, think again, look around, because there are still people who gives a shit about you, and would do anything for you to be on that right path again.
*ARC Copy was given in exchange for an honest review.
Rating: 4.5
Megan never felt more alone and vulnerable when her parents filed for divorce, and her dad suddenly marries the real estate agent. Her mom was no longer herself, often drowns herself in alcohol, and Meg was left to fend for herself. So when the handsome and popular Aidan comes into her little world and charmed her, she was hooked.
He made her feel like she was the most important thing in the world. One by one she started ditching her friends, her class, her life. She knew it was wrong, but she couldn't seem to stop because Aidan makes her forget, her makes her feel alive. She will do anything to be with him, even if it means lying to everyone who cares for her.
Another book from Anna Cruise that I have read in one sitting, and this time, it was all about a girl who was lost after her family broke apart. I don't blame her, she was young, vulnerable and well, gullible. Her parents (figuratively) ditched her, and when someone makes you feel like a princess after feeling like crap - you hold on to that person even if it means he's your ride to self destruction. She's lucky that she has her aunt who was firm enough to lay grounds, a step mother who doesn't push herself in her life, and friends who really cares for her.
Aidan was charming, manipulative and an ass. I hated him since the night he got her drunk and took advantage of her. He treated her like she was a piece of meat, took her innocence in the most carnal and selfish way and gave her some crap to forget her problems.
I wished her friends were stronger in trying to make her see what Aidan really is, how wrong he is for her. But her conviction was strong, I couldn't blame her friends if they just stood in the sidelines, watching her waste her life. Yet, the moment she needed them, they were there, ready to lend a hand and bail her out. Especially Case, I love him! He's an amazing kid with a good head on his shoulders than his pants. He's responsible, and never judged her. He listened to her, picks her up when she calls him, and silently waited for her until can finally come into her senses and see reality.
If I Fall is a fantastic read. I love the plot, the pacing, the characters in it (except for Aidan obviously). This was a story about a girl's journey - her ups and downs, how her life turned into an almost-nightmare but was saved right in time by people who cared about her the most. Sometimes when you thought you have lost everything, think again, look around, because there are still people who gives a shit about you, and would do anything for you to be on that right path again.
*ARC Copy was given in exchange for an honest review.
April 8, 2013
Review originally posted at: Future Suns
I received this from the author in a giveaway on her blog.
If I Fall is a very mature new-adult fiction. This book is about finding yourself before you lose yourself completely. Anna Cruise did a wonderful job of creating the world that Meg lives in. She doesn't go too far into description, but she doesn't do too little either.
Meg Calloway, fifteen-year-old, is suffering from her parents' sudden divorce that left her mother drinking too much. I know how hard it is for Meg to just live normally even though her dad had moved out with his new "model-like" wife, and now he's planning on selling the house Meg lives in because he can't pay for two houses. I know it is hard because of personal reasons, but I can feel how Meg feels underneath all of the anger that she wants to let out.
So now, her father's gone, her mother is heading down the path of an alcoholic, and Meg is ... losing herself. So then enters Aidan Westwood. He's a surfer, druggy, and drinks a lot. Meg doesn't realize that she's losing herself, so she just wants to have some fun to replace that sadness in her. Now, you can guess what happens next, Meg is headed down the path of self-destruction.
This book is very mature, it tells the story of a girl who doesn't know that she's losing herself until she finally has. Meg reaches out for help, only to grab on to a guy she barely knows who is willing to give everything to her in an unhealthy way.
This is actually the first mature book I've ever read and it was ... not what I was expecting. What I was expecting was to read a light-weight story about a girl and her life, but I didn't expect to read such an emotional and amazing book like this.
Sometimes, I wanted to be angry along with Meg, sometimes I just wanted to be frustrated against her for being so stupid and blind. But I guess that's what kept me reading.
I give 4 stars to this book because I thought it was too mature for my age, I am not really comfortable of reading such an emotional book like this, so that was why I give this a 4. But overall, I loved it. I loved every single detail that Anna described and the emotions that Anna created.
This was just ... unexpected.
I received this from the author in a giveaway on her blog.
If I Fall is a very mature new-adult fiction. This book is about finding yourself before you lose yourself completely. Anna Cruise did a wonderful job of creating the world that Meg lives in. She doesn't go too far into description, but she doesn't do too little either.
Meg Calloway, fifteen-year-old, is suffering from her parents' sudden divorce that left her mother drinking too much. I know how hard it is for Meg to just live normally even though her dad had moved out with his new "model-like" wife, and now he's planning on selling the house Meg lives in because he can't pay for two houses. I know it is hard because of personal reasons, but I can feel how Meg feels underneath all of the anger that she wants to let out.
So now, her father's gone, her mother is heading down the path of an alcoholic, and Meg is ... losing herself. So then enters Aidan Westwood. He's a surfer, druggy, and drinks a lot. Meg doesn't realize that she's losing herself, so she just wants to have some fun to replace that sadness in her. Now, you can guess what happens next, Meg is headed down the path of self-destruction.
This book is very mature, it tells the story of a girl who doesn't know that she's losing herself until she finally has. Meg reaches out for help, only to grab on to a guy she barely knows who is willing to give everything to her in an unhealthy way.
This is actually the first mature book I've ever read and it was ... not what I was expecting. What I was expecting was to read a light-weight story about a girl and her life, but I didn't expect to read such an emotional and amazing book like this.
Sometimes, I wanted to be angry along with Meg, sometimes I just wanted to be frustrated against her for being so stupid and blind. But I guess that's what kept me reading.
I give 4 stars to this book because I thought it was too mature for my age, I am not really comfortable of reading such an emotional book like this, so that was why I give this a 4. But overall, I loved it. I loved every single detail that Anna described and the emotions that Anna created.
This was just ... unexpected.
August 11, 2013
What path would you take if your whole life can crumbling down and how far would you have to fall to realise what has happened ?
For fifteen year old Meg who past life has been a happy one with her Dad, Mum and three friends. Now her parents have gotten a divorce and her father has moved in with his fiance Cheri , her mother won't come out of her room and is going in a downwards spiral and her life is at a standstill. Whilst hanging out with her friends one night at the beach, Meg decides to stay a bit longer and runs into Aidan Westwood - a senior at her school and what the girls call a Bad Boy/ Beach Hottie. Soon Aidan and Meg start hanging around more and Meg finds herself admist a world of parties, drugs, alcohol and sex. The further she goes in , the harder she finds it to get out so she goes along and soon Meg has lost all her old friends, her grades are down and her whole attitude has changed and not for the best. When tragedy strikes her family, her Aunt Sara comes to live with Meg and soon tries to put her in line and it's at this time when Meg starts to reconnect slowly with her old friends Jada and Case in particular. How long will it take Meg to realise that she needs her friends to help her out and that the road she has been walking isn't the one for her ? When another tragedy strikes one of the girls in her "old group" -Aidan's friends and ends up near death - is this the moment of clarification that Meg needs to move on with her life ? But , is it easy to walk away from that kind of life or has being a part of it made her and those she love in danger ?
If I Fall by Anna Cruise , is the second book of hers I have read. It wasn't one of my favourite stories but I wonder if that has to do with my age and where I am at. I can definitely see "If I Fall" by Anna Cruise being a popular book for those in the 15-17 bracket that are wanting to try a different path in life and going through the stages of teenage angst.
For fifteen year old Meg who past life has been a happy one with her Dad, Mum and three friends. Now her parents have gotten a divorce and her father has moved in with his fiance Cheri , her mother won't come out of her room and is going in a downwards spiral and her life is at a standstill. Whilst hanging out with her friends one night at the beach, Meg decides to stay a bit longer and runs into Aidan Westwood - a senior at her school and what the girls call a Bad Boy/ Beach Hottie. Soon Aidan and Meg start hanging around more and Meg finds herself admist a world of parties, drugs, alcohol and sex. The further she goes in , the harder she finds it to get out so she goes along and soon Meg has lost all her old friends, her grades are down and her whole attitude has changed and not for the best. When tragedy strikes her family, her Aunt Sara comes to live with Meg and soon tries to put her in line and it's at this time when Meg starts to reconnect slowly with her old friends Jada and Case in particular. How long will it take Meg to realise that she needs her friends to help her out and that the road she has been walking isn't the one for her ? When another tragedy strikes one of the girls in her "old group" -Aidan's friends and ends up near death - is this the moment of clarification that Meg needs to move on with her life ? But , is it easy to walk away from that kind of life or has being a part of it made her and those she love in danger ?
If I Fall by Anna Cruise , is the second book of hers I have read. It wasn't one of my favourite stories but I wonder if that has to do with my age and where I am at. I can definitely see "If I Fall" by Anna Cruise being a popular book for those in the 15-17 bracket that are wanting to try a different path in life and going through the stages of teenage angst.
July 22, 2013
I'm kinda hoping there will be a follow up story, actually I'm kind of demanding a follow up story! You know this book taught me that people aren't really what they seem, and that sometimes the people (or boy) who cares about you the most is actually right under your nose. Aidan at first I was intrigued by him, "you sure are cute when you're scared." I mean if I was 15 again and had this hunk of an 18 yr old after my affections I'd be all giddy like Megan. I mean I should have seen it coming that he was a freakin' weirdo when after he just meets her he wants to get a blow job (sorry I'm being so abrasive) "touch me," he urged, guiding my hand to his crotch. His fingers moved inside of me. "God, I want you." But sometimes there was truth in what Aidan was saying although it wasn't very nicely, "you think your dad feels guilty?" Aidan asked. "For running off and leaving you and your mom, for kicking you out of your house?" Then I really saw his true colors when he made Meg feel guilty for accusing him of cheating, when it was the truth, "rejected upstairs and accused on hitting on a friend." He stared at me, his bloodshot eyes fiery. "Thanks a effing lot." But there's Case it seems like he's always rescuing Meg, it seems like he always knows what to say, the boy is always there for her and she can't see what's under her nose, until it's almost to late, "just don't let anyone take advantage of you, Meg. Don't let anyone care that little for you. Especially when there are people right in front of you who do care. Who care a whole effing lot." So as I said I'm demanding a follow up story.
July 18, 2013
Full disclosure: I bought this book because of the pretty cover. I had no idea how un-pretty the subject matter was.
But wow, did it suck me in.
Megan is a breath of fresh air among female protagonists today. She felt REAL to me, stupid choices and all, because that's how life is. In fact, here's a quote from the book that I absolutely loved: "So things weren't tied up with a ribbon. Because that's not real life."
This book is REAL, which means that yes, there are parts that are unpleasant. The bad boy does not reform (oh Aidan, how I wanted to kick you in the balls by the end), the relationships Megan damages are not magically perfect by the end, but there is hope.
By far the part of the story I connected with the most was Megan's relationship with her dad and new stepmom. I've been there (though I certainly didn't act out quite the way Megan did), even with the same eventual feeling of I-want-to-hate-her-but-I-kinda-can't, and I applaud Ms. Cruise for the way Cheri reacted to Megan's misbehavior. I wish we could've seen a little more of Megan and her dad, because the parts we did see mostly made me sad.
This book was dark and gritty and very different from my usual read, but I'm glad I ended up reading it nonetheless.
But wow, did it suck me in.
Megan is a breath of fresh air among female protagonists today. She felt REAL to me, stupid choices and all, because that's how life is. In fact, here's a quote from the book that I absolutely loved: "So things weren't tied up with a ribbon. Because that's not real life."
This book is REAL, which means that yes, there are parts that are unpleasant. The bad boy does not reform (oh Aidan, how I wanted to kick you in the balls by the end), the relationships Megan damages are not magically perfect by the end, but there is hope.
By far the part of the story I connected with the most was Megan's relationship with her dad and new stepmom. I've been there (though I certainly didn't act out quite the way Megan did), even with the same eventual feeling of I-want-to-hate-her-but-I-kinda-can't, and I applaud Ms. Cruise for the way Cheri reacted to Megan's misbehavior. I wish we could've seen a little more of Megan and her dad, because the parts we did see mostly made me sad.
This book was dark and gritty and very different from my usual read, but I'm glad I ended up reading it nonetheless.
September 29, 2013
How do I describe why I found this book so moving?
I think it all comes down to the way Anna Cruise captured Meg's pain so beautifully. I felt like I was reading a true story about a girl who was hurting and didn't know how to handle all the crappy things life was throwing at her.
The characters in this book are real and the emotion is raw. I love the way the bad boy appeared sweet, but deep down was just plain bad. How true to life is that? I love the way the good guys were good and in spite of the way they were treated, remained solid and true...just like good friends do.
I could relate to Meg's feelings of helplessness and the need to feel loved and accepted by someone...even if that someone was the worst person to be with. I keep coming back to the same point - but the story felt real...and it touched my heart.
Kudos to Anna Cruise for capturing life's emotions in a story that hurt to read, but left me smiling.
I think it all comes down to the way Anna Cruise captured Meg's pain so beautifully. I felt like I was reading a true story about a girl who was hurting and didn't know how to handle all the crappy things life was throwing at her.
The characters in this book are real and the emotion is raw. I love the way the bad boy appeared sweet, but deep down was just plain bad. How true to life is that? I love the way the good guys were good and in spite of the way they were treated, remained solid and true...just like good friends do.
I could relate to Meg's feelings of helplessness and the need to feel loved and accepted by someone...even if that someone was the worst person to be with. I keep coming back to the same point - but the story felt real...and it touched my heart.
Kudos to Anna Cruise for capturing life's emotions in a story that hurt to read, but left me smiling.
May 29, 2013
I have to admit, I put off writing this review because I really couldn't get a handle on my feelings about this book. Then I realized that I had just read a book that made me FEEL. That's a good thing. I still don't know if I am feeling "poor Meg" or if I want to smack her, but that's ok too. This book will take you on an emotional rollercoaster. I think one of the reasons it resonates so well is because most of us who are reading this are females, and we can relate. We have either been there... as Meg, or maybe one of her friends, or even her Aunt. Or we now have our own kids that we hope we can keep safe from boys like Aiden. The writing is vivid and the characters are super real. Life isn't all sweetness and light (as much as we'd like it to be), but Meg makes it through, and comes out stronger.
January 11, 2015
This was an amazing book and I would highly recommend it to any teenager or adult who is struggling through life. It was completely well written and thoroughly thought out. It delved into topics that I have never read about in any book before. It was a book that made me think about my own life and whether I am on the right path myself. It was very thought provoking and I encourage all teens to read this book.
Megan deals with her parent's divorce, dad's remarriage and mother's going to rehab all at the same time and she doesn't deal well. With help from her aunt and a new friend she finally realizes it and gets better. Her life choices may have changed but she finally fixes things and goes back to her normal life.
This book teaches that life is precious and Anna Cruise has written a GREAT yet heartbreaking book. I can't wait to read more by Anna!
Megan deals with her parent's divorce, dad's remarriage and mother's going to rehab all at the same time and she doesn't deal well. With help from her aunt and a new friend she finally realizes it and gets better. Her life choices may have changed but she finally fixes things and goes back to her normal life.
This book teaches that life is precious and Anna Cruise has written a GREAT yet heartbreaking book. I can't wait to read more by Anna!
April 13, 2013
4 1/2 STARS
I love Anna Cruise's writing. She has a way of making her characters so real and brutally honest. This story, If I Fall, wasn't a "feel-good", sunshine & unicorns story. It was truthful, real-life and honest. Meg is a 15 yr old girl, struggling with being a normal teenager and all that goes along with that, as well as family dysfunction and pressures from her home life. As many kids do, she looks for ways to cope in all the wrong places, with all the wrong people. This story follows her through her semi-destructive behaviors, which she uses to gain comfort and understanding, until she finally begins to open her eyes. What she was searching for has been right in front of her all along. Raw, real & beautifully written.
I love Anna Cruise's writing. She has a way of making her characters so real and brutally honest. This story, If I Fall, wasn't a "feel-good", sunshine & unicorns story. It was truthful, real-life and honest. Meg is a 15 yr old girl, struggling with being a normal teenager and all that goes along with that, as well as family dysfunction and pressures from her home life. As many kids do, she looks for ways to cope in all the wrong places, with all the wrong people. This story follows her through her semi-destructive behaviors, which she uses to gain comfort and understanding, until she finally begins to open her eyes. What she was searching for has been right in front of her all along. Raw, real & beautifully written.
September 1, 2013
First and foremost? The cover... it's absolutely stunning, breathtaking even!! Megan is dealing with issues no problem teens her age should have to deal with. Her father has left her mom for another woman while her mom is depressed. This book was hard to read at an emotional level and it was hard to put down at all. Megan has her friends but one night she gets mixed up with the wrong crowd and then everything goes downhill from there. This story was a lot different than that of my usual reads because it really wasn't about love. It was a story about realisation and survival. I really hope this has a follow up or a sequel or something. It was a spectacular read!
June 3, 2013
If I Fall was not what I expected it to be about. It was so much more. I thought it would be another typical love story but was more than happy to find out I was wrong. If I Fall deals with addiction, divorce, love, hard choices, and choosing the wrong path. As a parent to two young girls, it made me really think about how my actions could influence them so much. Actually I thought back to my parents and how their divorce and poor choices led me down the path I chose at the time. It was a very intense, deep story that may not be all sunshine and roses but more real life than most stories I read. Great book and worth reading!
August 2, 2013
Wow...this was the second book I read by Anna Cruise and I was not disappointed! This story was so real...so fully of heartache and what I'd imagine any teen dealing with their parents divorce goes through. Meg has all the emotions, all the time, and ends up with the worst possible guy. It was so believable, because guys like Aidan prey on girls that are weak, insecure, etc. It really was a wonderful story. I loved how Meg had all these faults and regrets, just like real life. I can't wait to read more from this author!
May 13, 2013
This was a hard book to read. Not because of the writing, but the heaviness of the story. There were so many times I wanted to smack the main character because she was being stupid. Thing is, it was realistic, everything that happened. That is why this is a good story. It didn't sugar coat real things to make you feel better about yourself while reading it. It was believable. I do think the ending was a bit rushed. I'd have liked to see it flow easier. All and all, 4/5 platypires.
February 24, 2015
3.5 - 4 stars. I can't decide.
So things weren't tied up with a ribbon.
Because that's not real life.
It's really hard to read, this book is, mainly because I cannot stand seeing Meg going on a self-destructive path.
So things weren't tied up with a ribbon.
Because that's not real life.
It's really hard to read, this book is, mainly because I cannot stand seeing Meg going on a self-destructive path.
May 18, 2013
I wouldn't consider If I Fall a YA romance story, but more of a good and compelling "After School" special.
February 5, 2015
This was a very well written book. Even though it is a YA book, you can really relate to the MC and you just want to help her! I hope Ms.Cruise decides to write more cause I am definitely hooked!!!
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