Deadly Intentions

Blood Feud #2

by David Temrick

"War has broken out in the Seven Kingdoms. From small conflicts between long time friends, to open siege warfare in the country Tristan Vallius was entrusted with; Terum. A bold mercenary leader has seized control of the capital of Terum and while Tristan wages war to free his country from the shackles of oppression, a deeper conspiracy is taking form. Meanwhile, now that dragon magic has returned, the elder dragons struggle to bring balance to the world. Bethis, a powerful youngling dragon has had her growth artificially accelerated in order to provide Terum with a patron to offset the ecological damage that continues to ravage that country. Even as she comes into her power, she and Tristan face a growing unrest to the north. The remnants of the Draconis' Bane cult have found a new and much more dangerous leader who is more than willing to make alliances with the most lethal and murderous races known to the world of Amesdia. Time is in short supply and the fate of thousands rest on the shoulders of an inexperienced dragon and a deeply troubled Prince."

256 pages, Kindle Edition

First published January 31, 2013

About the author

For my sixth birthday, my father gave me a leather-bound copy of Treasure Island. At the time I remember being disappointed that it wasn’t an action figure of some kind. After reading it though, the story lit a fire inside of me and my joy of reading was born. Shortly afterwards, I began reading as many classics as I could get my hands on. I began to notice that the vast majority of classic literature had many elements of what are now classified as fantasy.

That genre became my focus when trying to find modern authors to enjoy.

I definitely don’t take myself too seriously, the books and stories that I write are in no way re-inventing the wheel nor am I trying to be the voice of a new generation of readers and writers. I write fun adventures which focus on characters that I care about and want others to care about.

Reviews

[Joshua Cintron · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a fabulous story with great potential. Unfortunately, the author has one fatal flaw of most indie authors--editing. Can you get past the myriad of formatting and spelling issues? Sure. The story in of itself is a good one.

I enjoy fantastical stories with knighthood, statehood's and historical creatures. This book has just that. The author packs a high dose of detail that aims to position the reader in a time long ago.

Pick up this book if you enjoy a good fantasy story.

[Love Of · Rating 5 out of 5]

Personal favorite. I thought the story line between Tristan and Bethis was great. What I personally loved was the ability to almost put yourself mentally right there with them. The characters were built perfectly mentally. I'm giving it to my buddy when he goes to the beach to read. Dragon lover out.

[Mary · Rating 1 out of 5]

A ruthless editing of this work is needed.

It reads like an unfinished draft. The text is rife with misspellings and grammatical errors. There are numerous incomplete or illogical sentences and paragraphs. The punctuation is atrocious. There is needless repetition ( e.g. the characters "chuckle" on every other page and in inappropriate situations). Much of the dialogue is painfully sophomoric and the characters mostly one-dimensional. Very disappointing.

[Kelley · Rating 2 out of 5]

I found this book inexpensively on Kindle, and was drawn to it by the promise of a quick, fun read and a dragon heroine.

I can't finish it. I can't take it any more. My head is spinning from all the grammar and editing mistakes. Scarcely a sentence goes by without a major error of some kind -- missing commas ("Let's eat grandma" where "Let's eat, grandma" is needed), missing apostrophes, misplaced modifiers, comma splices, the sorts of mistakes we should learn not to make in Freshman Composition. Also, the paragraphing is so haphazardly marked that it's hard to follow. This book really needed a good polishing. Perhaps a good book is hidden under this mountain of mistakes.

But sadly, my problems don't end there. The depiction of women raises a big question mark in my mind. What is he thinking? The female dragons are powerful, impressive creatures, particularly the central one; I am sorely tempted to go on reading for her sake. But the depictions of human women seem to spring from a deeply conservative socio-political philosophy. On the side of Evil, women fight and wield power. On the side of Good, women wait and weep. The human female lead, the hero's love interest, is a fluttery, passive, timid little baby-minder who trembles and shrieks and boasts no discernible character traits other than devotion to the hero. She's the sort of cringeworthy non-heroine we might expect to find in the pulp fantasy novels of the 1950s. Apparently, only female dragons get to rise (literally) above distressed damsel status. On the Good side, that is.

I'm always up for a good dragon story, but I fear this doesn't qualify.

[Laurie · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is a great book for fans of fantasy stories and/or readers that love stories set within medieval times. Prepare yourself for magic, dragons, brave warriors, and royal feuds as the saga continues in this sequel to Draconis' Bane. I personally love the fact that dragons are given credit for personalities, emotions, and a pride in their history instead of just being depicted as brainless, violent creatures of mass destruction.

This plot has great potential and could easily be a 5 star book if the editing was equal to the quality of the incredibly creative storyline.