The Power of Unwavering Focus (2022) is a practical and personal guide that offers clear steps toward ending the distractions, fears, and worries that keep us stressed out and anxious, while carving a clear path toward more mental clarity and focus. Packed with concrete steps and personal reflections, it offers a deep look into the awesome power of the mind and how focus can help everyone live a more purposeful and joyful life.
Dandapani is a Hindu priest, entrepreneur, and former monk of ten years. An internationally renowned speaker and world-leading expert on leveraging the human mind to create a life of purpose and joy, Dandapani has shared the stage with world-renowned leaders such as Hillary Clinton, Ban Ki-moon, and former French President Francois Hollande. He and his wife are currently creating a 33-acre retreat center and botanical garden in Costa Rica to further their mission of inspiring personal growth and self-transformation.
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Reclaim your life by mastering one simple skill: mental focus.
It’s a brisk September morning in the Black Hills of South Dakota. Gusty winds rustle the tall grass sprouting between rocky outcrops. The chill in the early morning air makes it feel alive. We’re here to see the wild Mustang horses on their nature reserve.
Suddenly, in a cloud of hooves and fury, a herd comes flashing up the canyon. Snorting clouds of steam in the morning air, they jump and buck and turn on a dime. They scrabble up cliffs and perch on dizzying outcrops. Frolicking in the cool air they’re a vision of strength, power, and endless, chaotic motion.
Now imagine you are asked to ride one of these wild horses right now. Just hop on and experience that raw power and speed for yourself. Would you say yes?
Even if you train horses for a living the answer is likely still a resounding no! All that power and energy is awesome – but uncontrollable. And you simply don’t have the skills to make that wild horse follow your commands and keep you safe.
The same is true of your mind. The human mind is powerful and full of energy, but it, too, often runs wild throughout the day as we multitask, scroll, and ruminate on the past or worry about the future. This distraction might interfere with relationships, increase stress – even keep you up at night.
In this book, we’ll look at how mastering one key skill – the ability to focus – can harness the power of awareness to help you live a more stress-free, successful, and rewarding life. You’ll learn how consistent practice in focus can deepen your relationships, overcome stress, and help you chart a path toward your goals that is clear, measurable, and achievable.
Like training a wild horse, it will take daily practice. But if you want to ride off into a fulfilled, happy life harnessing the awesome power of your mind, let’s trot together into the first section.
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Happiness is a lifestyle, not a goal.
It’s early morning in Sarah’s kitchen, and she’s half-awake and making coffee before the kids get up for school. Smartphone in one hand, she’s scrolling notifications while shoveling coffee grounds with the other. Noticing the time, she shuffles over to the fridge to start breakfast when email notifications start pinging.
Not smelling coffee, she notices she didn’t turn it on. Frustrated, she jabs at the button before her eyes wander again to her phone, curious about the new emails.
Her pulse jumps as she reads that a colleague is sick and can’t do a presentation this afternoon. Sarah’s mood jumps from frustration to fear – she hates giving presentations. Her heart pounds as she imagines the team asking her to step in.
Now she’s riding a roller coaster of emotions and worries. Just then her kids bound down the stairs for breakfast. She snaps at them to go get dressed as she’s running late. Instantly regretting the harsh words, she sees their good mood disappear. What can she do? she thinks to herself. She’s got a million things on her mind and the kids will understand.
Her day is already full of frustration, worry, anger, and sadness.
After years of mornings like this, Sarah feels burned out and disconnected from her kids. She’s unhappy and wonders how things got this way.
Now let’s imagine the same morning, but this time Sarah does one thing differently: she focuses her mind.
Rising early after a good night’s sleep, Sarah makes her bed – closing her sleep routine before starting the day. Once complete, she gives her full attention to the next task, making her coffee. Then does the same with breakfast, and so on.
She’s already decided not to check her notifications until later at the office so she can give her full attention to her morning. Sensing her attention, the kids feel happy and loved. Their joy and openness over breakfast bring her happiness, too, and they start the day happy.
Focusing like this throughout the day means that each client or task that arises gets Sarah’s full presence. Feeling energized by her interactions, she brings that feeling home at the end of the day to her family. After years of this routine, Sarah feels fulfilled. Her relationships thrive and her projects are rewarding.
While the goal was the same – get up and start the day – these two Sarahs end up very far apart. The only difference? One used her daily routines to practice focusing her awareness and the other didn’t. How can focus make such a difference? It all comes down to the mind.
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The mind doesn’t wander, but awareness does.
If focusing the mind is so powerful, it’s a good idea to spend a few moments now to understand how the mind and awareness work.
First, your mind exists in three states, a conscious, a subconscious, and a superconscious mind. Others might define these differently, but for our purposes let’s consider these states using unfocused Sarah as our guide.
Her conscious mind is the one that is interacting with the world – moving her through the kitchen, reacting to bodily sensations, and aware of her hunger. It reacts through instinct. If something sharp or hot touches her skin, this conscious mind reacts and pulls away.
Her subconscious mind is bigger. It’s caught up in Sarah’s reasoning and logic. Unlike her conscious mind, it records all her daily activities and decides whether she remembers them or not. It recognizes patterns and functions a lot like core programming, interpreting what it encounters and predicting what comes next.
Her superconscious mind is the hardest to describe because it goes beyond words in many ways. This part of the mind generates creativity and intuition. It’s what some might call the spiritual mind, the core self, or higher mind. It experiences the profound and transformative.
Only this third mind understands what is good for Sarah in the long run, but Sarah lives only in the conscious and subconscious mind. The daily barrage of information and emotions means her superconscious remains silent.
By now, it’s clear the mind itself is vast. But defining the mind must include a definition of its agent, awareness. So, let’s take a closer look at this.
As unfocused Sarah moves through her morning, her awareness travels through areas of her mind as she navigates. Imagine her awareness as a ball of light that illuminates only a small area around it and can only focus on one area at a time. As Sarah makes the coffee, for instance, her body goes through the motions while her awareness, that glowing ball of light, is actually lighting up the news-oriented part of her mind as she scrolls her phone. When she notices the coffee’s not on, her awareness jets over to the “frustration” area of the mind. Reading the email about the presentation, that glowing ball exits frustration and rockets over to “fear.”
Her mind has not moved in all this, but her awareness has traveled at light speed through distant areas of her mind. Seeing her kids, which usually moves her awareness into happiness, couldn’t budge it this morning. It was held tight in “fear” and she snapped at them. This hurtled awareness over to the sadness area of her mind, and so on.
But focused Sarah chose to keep that ball of light fully illuminating each task, and followed it to completion. She used her morning rituals to practice focused awareness in each moment. Without multitasking, coffee is made and breakfast prepared. When her awareness is fully on her family, they feel her presence. She isn’t distracted and awareness doesn’t drift into the future or the past.
In other words, she is not at the mercy of outside influences, and chooses where in her mind her awareness dwells. This is a choice we can all make, as we’ll see next.
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Renounce multitasking to reclaim your awareness.
Understanding the states of mind and the role awareness plays in navigating them, leads to a startling point. Your mind isn’t you, your awareness is.
To find out why, let’s return to our wild Mustang horses but twist our metaphor just a little bit. Let’s imagine just one of those racing mustangs as our awareness. For most of us, this awareness runs wild and untrained throughout our vast minds. As a result, our awareness races from place to place, situation to situation, until it exhausts itself. Darting between the past and future, it might cover miles in a day, but it wasn’t moving toward any defined goal. It only stops to rest when exhausted. A creature of habit, it returns again and again to the same places, even dangerous ones – even though it’s harmful to long-term survival. The vast area the horse wanders through doesn’t change much, but where the horse wanders determines how it experiences life.
Now, let’s imagine awareness as the same horse after training. Listening carefully to commands from the rider, this horse moves from area to area efficiently and with control. It doesn’t exhaust itself in a few moments of panic. It’s created well-worn paths to happy, healthy areas of the mind, as the rider often goes there. The longer awareness – this focused horse – follows signals from the rider, the more trust is developed. The horse no longer startles and runs off into the swamps of trauma or the cliff edges of unresolved emotions – no matter what comes up.
To do this, awareness must follow, not lead. But who is the rider? The rider is your superconscious mind – that core that knows what is good for you, the source of your intuition and creativity. Focus allows the third state of mind, the superconscious, to activate. It can start to move as one with awareness, and flow to places that are healthy and good to dwell in the mind. You and your surroundings thrive as your mental energy is channeled wisely. You can keep focused on your goals without unnecessary stress, and be fully present in all you do.
All training, especially something as energetic and powerful as your awareness, must begin slowly and steadily. Returning to focused Sarah and her morning, we saw her using her daily rituals to practice focusing her awareness. Sure, some mornings go better than others, she’s not perfect. But she uses daily tasks and interactions to practice attention, with the ultimate goal of focusing her mind all the time.
In the next section, we’ll explain how everyone can start to do the same.
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Focus requires practice and progress tracking.
To begin, start small. You wouldn’t hop off the couch after a long holiday weekend of burgers and beer to run the New York City Marathon. You wouldn’t make it very far and likely give up running altogether after a few sweaty miles.
To start practicing focus it’s best not to attempt becoming a yogi overnight, either. Think of how many hours in the day you go down social media rabbit holes, or find yourself running late because you were mulling over a fight you had and lost track of time. You’ve spent a lifetime practicing distraction, it’ll take time to practice focus.
So keeping patience close at hand, begin by making a list of five things you do each and every day – things like brushing your teeth or talking to your partner over a meal. Write your list in order of importance, too. If your family often complains that you’re distracted, knowing it is important to your relationships might bump that last one up the list, for instance.
For the first task, commit that from now on, you’ll be totally focused on that task until it’s complete. Do the very best job you can at whatever the task is, and try to increase your effort each time. When you notice your focus wandering over dinner with your spouse, for instance, bring it back and redouble your effort. Your full presence may be difficult to maintain at first – again, you’ve practiced distraction for ages now. But with enough practice, it becomes easier.
To keep yourself motivated, take a quiet moment after you’ve completed the practice each day and score yourself. You can use a simple scale like three points for excellent focus, two points for mostly focused, one point for doing okay, and zero if you felt your attention wandered.
Once a month, add up the score and divide by the number of days you tracked. It might take a few months for your score to improve for just this first task – but don’t add on the next task until you’re consistently scoring yourself excellent in focus on the first. Only you can decide when you take on the next – but be patient. Like a muscle, practice builds strength over time. The more you flex your focus muscle on these small, daily rituals, the stronger your focus will be.
Daily practice and progress tracking train your awareness to hold firm, even in the face of external chaos. Holding your awareness in a conversation with your spouse, for instance, can keep you from responding angrily in the moment during a misunderstanding, and instead ask for clarification. Over time, this strengthens your relationship. Devoting full attention to cleaning your teeth will pay benefits at the dentist, too.
So keep motivated knowing all your efforts to practice focus, even on days when they fail, are helping you in many ways all at once. Being honest and patient with yourself, as with physical training, will help on tough days. As your practice deepens and you remain focused more and more of the time, you’ll be ready to thwart the enemies of focus, like worry and anxiety. We’ll see how in the next section.
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Focus can help overcome worry, anxiety, and stress.
Returning to unfocused Sarah one last time, let’s use her awareness to uncover some common enemies of focus.
When she reads the work email, her awareness flies from preparing breakfast to the part of her mind where she projects the future. She imagines herself nervous and sweaty in front of the client, her mouth dry and stammering. Her awareness might have flown backward remembering an earlier experience in life when she was afraid in front of a group. As her awareness moves to this part of her mind, she’s flooded with unresolved emotions from the past, and projects them into the future.
Her awareness travels from the present, to the future, to a painful past, all in a few moments. The result is she feels overwhelmed by stress and anxiety.
Focused Sarah, on the other hand, puts off reading emails until she’s ready to focus on work. If she’s tasked with the presentation at the last minute, she might notice her awareness trying to imagine terrible things or remember painful memories, but she brings her focus back to the task at hand until it’s complete. Her practiced focus keeps her awareness from wandering and so she makes wise decisions here and now. The presentation goes well and she feels exhilarated.
The stronger an unresolved emotion or traumatic memory is, the more awareness may be drawn to that area when new stresses arise. Some traumas have well-worn paths in the mind as our awareness travels back to them often, channeling mental energy but resolving nothing. There are many good ways, including therapy and treatment, to help resolve these over time. Practicing focus can also help.
For example, while brushing your teeth, you might notice your awareness wandering into unresolved emotions or traumatic memories. That’s OK, but try and bring it back to brushing patiently. Remind yourself that you’re OK right now, and let your focus stay in the present. Over time, you’ll trust your ability to focus your awareness away from destructive thought patterns and back into the current moment.
Similarly, when you find yourself worrying, you’ll notice that you are imagining the future, not focusing on the present; you’re using past, often negative, experience to predict possible futures; and you’re exhausting your mental energy. Gently bringing your focus back to the present shuts down this process and returns your energy to the task at hand. Helping you respond wisely to what is actually happening in the now.
With practice, this can yield incredible benefits, and you don’t have to change your life to get them. Using the things you already do to practice focusing your awareness, over time, can change how you experience much of your life. The more your focus is present, the more connected you can be to yourself, your relationships, and your life’s journey. Helping you to make excellent use of the most limited and valuable resource of them all: the time of your life.
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Your mind is vast and has many areas in it, but your awareness is finite. Awareness can be controlled by focus in constructive, rather than destructive, ways. Start slowly by bringing full attention and effort to small daily rituals. Expand this over time to give you control over where you direct and invest your mental energy. As your focus strengthens, the practice can help root out worry, overcome chronic stress, deepen your relationships, and change how you experience life.
Here’s a piece of actionable advice as you navigate your process:
Keep going!
No matter how long it takes, once you’ve learned to focus completely during all five daily routines you’ve chosen – don’t stop! Make another list and choose five more daily rituals to take on. Add them one at a time and slowly, just like the first. Be sure to track your progress and reflect regularly, too. You’ll begin to notice how the more you stay focused each day, the more easily you prioritize and free up mental energy to invest in the things that truly matter in your life.