The Waiting Child: How the Faith and Love of One Orphan Saved the Life of Another

by Cindy Champnella

The Waiting Child is an extraordinary story of human resilience in the face of tremendous odds. Adopted by an American family at age four, Jaclyn goes to her new home with a great burden. Her new family had to leave behind a little boy who had been under her charge at the Chinese orphanage. Jaclyn inspires two families, several agencies, and two governments to cooperate to reunite her with "her baby." Everyone who reads this story will believe in the power of love to change the world.

Genres: Adoption, Nonfiction, Memoir, Biography Memoir, Parenting, China, Asia

272 pages, Paperback

First published March 14, 2003

Reviews

[Kim Williams · Rating 3 out of 5]

I definitely have mixed feelings about this book. On one hand, it is an amazing story. I was adopted from Korea, have two other siblings that were adopted, have been involved in adoption groups my entire life and for a time, even worked in an adoption agency, so the book hit close to home in many aspects. I think there were very few pages where I didn't find myself sobbing. And I will also say that throughout reading the book, I would vary from reading the book to trying to persuade my husband to adopt/start the application process! ;) So, those are the reasons why one should read this book.

However, as an adoptee, I would say that I have a problem with the mother in this story sharing her daughter's story so openly. I firmly believe that an adopted child's story is their story and they should be the ones to share it...not their parents. I understand to a certain degree that as an adoptive parent, your child's adoption is a part of your own story....however, details about the way her birthmother left her child are very private matters. I'm not sure if I would want my history out there for all to read and I don't think that the daugher is of the age where she would be able to fully process what it means to put your story in print. And while the author was extremely honest in this story about her own feelings when she initially met her daughter, I think that there would be a lot of things that would be really difficult to read as her adopted daughter....especially during adolescence.

So...although I think this is defintely worth reading, for me, it left me with mixed feelings.

[Katie Kenig · Rating 4 out of 5]

There are books that make you cry, and there are books that make you so angry at the world that you feel like throwing the book and storming off, and there are books that make you incredibly secure in your path in life. This book is all three, at least for me.

The Waiting Child is a memoir of adoption, one of many I've read along the path of our own adoption journey, and one of the most touching, as far as I was concerned. It may have been because it was about the adoption of an older child, rather than a baby, as we're adopting older as well. It may have been because Jaclyn - the small girl that they adopted - was so headstrong and had such a wonderfully strong personality. But I think really, what touched me the most, was her impatience.

Yes, really! Jaclyn was desperately impatient, once she had found a Mama to call her own, to bring "her baby" - Xiao Mei Mei, who she took care of at the orphanage - home, to find him a Mama and family to love him as well. I have dealt with more than a little impatience along our journey. Right now we're in a place where we have waited months - yes months! - for ONE small piece of paper to be signed at some beauracratic office in the US and returned to Canada. All our hopes and dreams and wishes for the future have been stalled because of one piece of paper sitting on some poor overworked social worker's desk. I'm sure he or she doesn't know how angry I get at the world because I have to wait. I'm sure they aren't being malicious, but it hurts just the same.

And so I related to Jaclyn. Oh, I related to her mom, too, and her whole family, but I understood Jaclyn somehow. I know what it's like to have the future of someone you love stuck in someone else's hands. I know how it feels to be frustrated by government. I know how unfair it can all feel sometimes.

Though this book is written by Jaclyn's adoptive mom, it is really Jaclyn's story - a little girl who was willing to move heaven and earth to get a little boy she loved a home. She was successful in the end; Xiao Mei Mei became her cousin, Lee, an all-American little boy who became vastly different from the quiet and beaten-down little orphan they all knew from China. It's a triumphant story, and a sad one. It made me want to rescue *all the children!* - something that happened to me similarly after our adoption training here.

The book is studded with photographs from the journey of adoption this family followed, which are touching and strike straight to the heart. It was hard for me to imagine that this little girl, in words and pictures - was now a teenager and almost an adult. Her story, however, is timeless and poignant.

If you're following your own adoption path, I think it's likely you'll love this book. In fact, if you have a heart at all, I think it's likely you'll like it quite a bit.

[Laura · Rating 5 out of 5]

My very favorite adoption story ever. (Well, excepting my own.) Heart-breaking, heart-warming, inspiring - this book has it all. (And I have it loan out to my local friends.) :)

[Rachel B · Rating 4 out of 5]

4.5 stars

This is such a sweet story about a young girl adopted from China who's desperate to see her friend from the orphanage also receive a family.

Overall, I really enjoyed this book, though there were a few things that kept me from giving it a full five stars.

The author mentions her faith, God, and Jesus a few times, but never simply states whether she is a Christian, Mormon, etcetera; it seemed like she was being purposely vague and, ultimately, minimizing the role God played in her story instead of giving Him His proper place.

She also mentions that she sees a psychic about her adoption progress even though "[her] faith told [her] that this was sacrilege." (p ix) She then goes on to emphasize that the psychic's predictions came true.

So, a worthwhile read about adoption, but not one to take spiritual advice from!

[Rita Arnson · Rating 5 out of 5]

As a grandmother of three Chinese granddaughters this book warmed my heart but was gut wrenching at the same time. I had tears in my eyes more than once both for happy stories and unbearably sad stories. What a beautiful memoir written about the adoption process from China, the sadness and the incredible joy. I loved this book and I will be looking for her next one.

[Sandie · Rating 3 out of 5]

...and "how the faith and love of one orphan saved the life of another" (subtitle). A family from Michigan adopted a child from China, who was very attached to another orphan. This is their story.

[Sherry · Rating 5 out of 5]

How can you not give this a five star ??!!
Amazing and wonderful story !!

[Allison Williams · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book!!! I couldn't put it down. I read it in record time and it's one of my top three favorite reads ever!!!

[Jodi · Rating 5 out of 5]

One of my all time favorites. A beautiful story of love and perseverance.

[Heidi · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was a very emotional but satisfying read. Jaclyn was adopted from a Chinese orphanage by an American family when she was 4. But in the orphanage she had been assigned to be the "mother" of a not-quite-two-year-old boy. She didn't know she was leaving the orphanage until the moment she was given to her new parents, so she didn't even get to say goodbye. Once Jaclyn learned English and could communicate with her adopted family she lobbied unrelentingly for them to return and adopt her "baby."

The book was written by Jaclyn's mother, Cindy, who was honest about her struggle to come to terms with adopting an older child who had baggage. Although she was shocked by some of the conditions in the orphanage, she knew the people running the orphanage were doing the best they could with the resources given. This felt like an honest account with a positive spin. Cindy is strongly Christian and her prayers and conversations with God featured prominently but not in an annoying way. This was a faith-promoting book.

I liked Cindy's insights when she saw America through Jaclyn's eyes. Jaclyn would get incredibly excited over things like new underwear or a refrigerator full of food, and Cindy would realise she herself was guilty of ingratitude. Or Cindy would take Jaclyn to Chinese school where all communication was written or spoken in Chinese and she would get a glimpse of what immigrants must face when they take their children to American schools.

I saw that another reviewer had concerns about Jaclyn's privacy and the same thoughts had crossed my mind. Jaclyn and her "baby" Lee were very young when this book was published--I don't think they were old enough to give informed consent to have their story shared with the world. Hopefully this hasn't caused problems as the children grew up.

I laughed, I cried (a lot), and I hope for the best for these kids.

[Heidi · Rating 5 out of 5]

This was written by a dear friend of mine so I'm sure my review is biased, but you can't read this book and then walk away without a desire to want to do something to make the world a better place. Just like Three Cups of Tea by Greg Mortensen, it shows the reader the power that just one individual can have on changing the world one life at a time.

Jaclyn became the youngest recipient to ever receive the Congressional Award as an Angel in Adoption for her work in bringing Lee to America. The faith and desires of a young child successfully moved mountains to bring home the child for whom she cared when she lived in China.

Jaclyn's story has touched many lives, and has brought more than 300 additional children home to their adoptive families, just by parents reading her story and deciding to adopt as well. My own niece came home-adopted from China- as a result of my sister-in-law reading this book.

[Ellyn · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book tells the story of Jaclyn, a little girl who is adopted from China at the age of 4. She is forced to leave behind a little boy whom she mothered and cared for in the orphanage, and as she settles into her new American family, she begins a campaign to convince her parents to go back to China and bring home "her baby". It's an inspiring story (hard to believe at times) that kept me reading, and it really paints a picture of the challenges and rewards of adopting an older child. The book is written by Jaclyn's adoptive mother, and I do somewhat see the point of other reviewers who suggested that the story should have been left for Jaclyn to tell, yet at the same time, I think it's cool how many people have been led to adopt, especially to adopt older children, as a result of the book and Jaclyn's story.

[Alison · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was a great adoption story, it shows us the power of love and how this young girl now named Jaclyn, who was adopted at the age of 4 from China, could never forget a young boy whom she looked after in the orphanage. He, Xiao Mei Mei who was younger than her and whom she called __her baby__, was Dependent on her for any affection he might receive. . She constantly brought him up to her family and prayed for him to be able to come the the USA and live with her. This started an international effort to have him adopted and to give Jaclyn some piece of mind. A wonderful look into the the mind of an Orphan who from early years could remember almost all of what she went through before she was adopted, and of her ability to love so unconditionally.

[Tracy M · Rating 3 out of 5]

I was moved by the tenacity of heart that Jacyln possessed in bringing 'her baby' into the loving and safe arms of his own set of parents. The fact that so many factors did wind up aligning so that it was possible to do so was a blessing.

My biggest frustration was the disregard of self-worth by those adopting when it came to name change. Why couldn't the girls (or Lee for that matter)keep their given names? Knowing that at least a part of could be dropped; that of where they were found. Perhaps slide it in as a middle name if need be (or keep as the 1st name but call child by their middle name as so many people do). What was with the absolute purge of identity felt to be necessary?

[Jamie · Rating 5 out of 5]

One of the best books ever. A true story about a little orphaned girl in China who is adopted by a family in America. She never gives up finding the little boy she took care of in the orphanage. A true tear-jerker, especially since it's true. Very inspiring. My husband read it first and really wanted me to read it. Anyone who reads this book will be touched and enlightened to the problem of orphans. My husband and I decided to adopt from Tawain and this book was played a major role in our decision.

[Wendy · Rating 3 out of 5]

This book is heart-wrenching and terrible, uplifting and joyful. It made be sick and furious at the Chinese government and the Chinese people for the way they mistreat and disregard the needs of their children. It made me livid that "saving face" is the most important thing, everyone else be damned.

Unfortunately, I'm sure there are millions of children everywhere in the world, including in the US, who are equally in need of homes.

However, the fierce and courageous spirit of this little girl is amazing and can teach us all something.

[Cassandra · Rating 3 out of 5]

I'm a prospective adoptive parent in process of adopting my first daughter. Like others, I have mixed thoughts. It's a beautiful story but not well written. I kept wishing there were more details, more stories. The Goodreads description says that it's about "Jaclyn (who) inspires two families, several agencies, and two governments to cooperate to reunite her with 'her baby.'" Yes, it is, but it also barely discusses HOW everyone cooperates to bring how Jaclyn's baby. There is very little information about the process, only stories about how badly Jaclyn wanted to bring him home.

[Emily Kessler · Rating 2 out of 5]

This story was heartbreaking and compelling. I tried to read with the publishing date in mind, not being too critical because I have the hindsight of 20 more years of adoptees speaking about their experiences that the author wouldn't have had. However, I just can't get past the author's insistence in the preface that this is her daughter's story to tell... and then how she proceeds to tell that very story - among other children's - in excruciatingly personal detail while her daughter was still much too young to consent.

[Hilarie · Rating 5 out of 5]

I ABSOLUTELY loved this book. It is such a touching story of the miracles of adoption. A young 3-4 year old girl (although at that age they are considered an older child adoption) is adopted from China and won't stop asking her mom to bring over her "baby". I picked it up because the little boy vaguely resembles my middle son, and he and his older sister have such a strong bond. it had me in tears. Such a neat story!

[Ananta · Rating 5 out of 5]

Read it all in one sitting-- couldn't put it down! The touching true story of a 5-year-old Chinese orphan girl who, though adopted by an American family, never forgot a little boy who she had cared for in her Chinese orphanage. Written by her adopted mother, this is a story that will pluck your heartstrings. Don't worry, it has a happy ending!!

[Brenda · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is the most riveting book, I could not put it down and the fact that it's true is even more riveting. A must read for everyone, but even more for anyone who knows an adopted
chinese child.

It would be great to read with the Book, Bound By Love, by Linda Droeger, who also adopted a Chinese girl, from an agency founded in Denver, another very enthralling read.

[Suzi · Rating 4 out of 5]

Powerful powerful book about a little girl adopted from China, who can't & won't forget the littler boy she cared for in the orphanage.
Of you have ever thought about adoption, how it works, the impact on both kids (adopted), our families, you won't baa able to put this down. And you might call an adoption agency to boot!

[Abby Hope · Rating 5 out of 5]

The Waiting Child was touching, sad, funny, inspiring, and so many other things. It was well written and honest and anyone with a love for adoption stories should read it as it is a very beautiful story. I really can't say enough good things about this book. It tells the story of a remarkable little girl and the love she had, even though so little had been shown to her.

[WhyteOwl · Rating 1 out of 5]

The book was not a bad book. It was very well written and a book able to give me the visual in my head as I read. It just was not the story that I thought that it was.

I hope you give the book a try. The author did a good job on the book and the writing.
Thank you for sharing your story with me.

[Jackie · Rating 4 out of 5]

What a powerful book about the amazing tenacity of love. How a tiny girl of age four can feel a mothers love for another child and NEVER forget is incredible. Jaclyn is an ispiration of hope and enduring to the end.

[steph · Rating 4 out of 5]

It's been three years since I've read this book but it was so vividly written and Jacyln's desire to get her "baby" back was so moving that it's stuck with me since then. A lovely story about hope, triumph and love. I might have to go back and re-read it now.

[Laurel · Rating 5 out of 5]

Well written, amazing story about a 4 yr old girl adopted from China. While in the orphanage she emotionally adopted and cared for a younger boy. This amazing true story is of her quest to bring "her baby" home.

[Esther Dushinsky · Rating 5 out of 5]

Raw, real and so poignant. I'd give this six stars if I could. Cindy is so honest about her own struggles and ambivalence. She gives us a window into the world of a child that was abandoned and how that experienced shaped her. This is a book that I will read again and again.

[Danielle · Rating 5 out of 5]

Made me want to save the world, one child at a time!

[Sarah Wu · Rating 4 out of 5]

Very moving.