Exile in Guyville: How a Punk Rock Redneck Faggot Texan Moved to West Hollywood and Refused to Be Shiny and Happy

by Dave White

Here’s the diary of a man who in mid-life found himself uprooted and dumped into West Hollywood, an unfamiliar place not exactly known for stability. White explores his neighborhood ? “queens: 6 percent; cranky 70-year-old Russians who give you the evil eye when you walk past: 2 percent; blonde girls with big, round, hard fakeys who think Jennifer Anniston just got lucky: 10 percent; miscellaneous cool kids, hustlers, and actual crazy people: 5 percent.”

White gets gigs as a freelance writer, goes to the grocery store where his Russian neighbors ask him questions because they think he’s from the old country; and encounters Sara Gilbert at the Laundromat, Leonard Maltin at the movies, and Ben Affleck driving a Rolls-Royce so ridiculously conspicuous he might as well be driving Chitty-Chitty, Bang-Bang.

What began as weekly diaries emailed to out-of-state family and friends evolved into a blog called “Dave White Knows” and in 2003 became a monthly column in Instinct called “Exile in Guyville.” Alyson Books now presents White’s blogs in expanded form with loads of new material that will be even more irritating to the Instinct readers who didn’t like his column. “They requested more fashion and skin-care features in its place, which makes me kind of proud.”

Dave White is a freelance journalist specializing in music. His reviews and features have been seen in E! Online, IFILM, LA Weekly, Dallas Observer, Instinct, The Advocate, Glue, Cybersocket, Total Movie, Unzipped, and Frontiers. White lives in West Hollywood with his boyfriend, the Morocco Mole, and is locally esteemed as the “King of Pancakes.”

Genres: Memoir, Humor, LGBT, Nonfiction, Queer, Biography, Music

245 pages, Paperback

First published January 1, 2006

About the author

Librarian Note: There is more than one author by this name in the Goodreads database.

Reviews

[Adam Hodgins · Rating 5 out of 5]

Hilarious! I love this book and I love Dave White. I want to hang out with him, make fun of shit on TV then go to a Sonic Youth concert.

[Damien · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was hilarious. I love his term "Dress-All-Stupid Queens" (which ten years later would simply be known as the "hipster"). My favorite part was his description of Diamanda Galas- I paraphrase: imagine the original Halloween film, but instead of Jamie Lee Curtis, it's Maria Callas screaming for her life. I needed a good laugh at this time, and Dave White delivered. He's as funny as David Sedaris and Margaret Cho, but with better taste in music.

[Christian · Rating 5 out of 5]

White is fucking hilarious as he recounts his move with his partner from Texas to West Hollywood. The book began as a diary of sorts to friends back home in Texas as he documents the life and experiences of he, his partner, and best of all, the strange creatures he encounters in his West Hollywood neighborhood.

[Geoff Orr · Rating 5 out of 5]

Mr. White recently came out with E-I-G in audiobook form and I re-listened to it on a long road trip. Not only did I find it held up over time, but it is now much more relatable to me personally, after moving to Colorado 7 years ago Like Mr. White, I've come to terms with an grown to love my new adopted home. His experiences lead me to think greater about my own, and I had a few rather nice "Ah-hah" moments.

[John · Rating 4 out of 5]

A gay curmudgeon's take on life in L. A. Although he and his partner, Morocco Mole, ended up in the middle of the West Hollywood ghetto (from Texas), this isn't entirely a gay book, but about dwelling on the bad there, while slowly recognizing the good (albeit grudgingly). White is naturally funny, and a wicked good writer to boot!

[Melody · Rating 3 out of 5]

I enjoyed this snarkified look at West Hollywood in the late 90s. White is whiny and snarky and queeny and hilarious. The whiny never overwhelms the funny. I had a good time with it, and wish he'd write more. There's always room for a cranky ol' queen in my library.

[David · Rating 2 out of 5]

David Sedaris he ain't. This book is only kinda funny for me. It never reached the "holy shit" level of funny I expect in humor books. It also might be because I live in San Francisco, and queens and bears funny in their bitterness are a dime a dozen.

[Scott Delgado · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book was delightful. Yes, the author is a grumpy misanthrope, but so is Eeyore and Pooh and the gang love that damn donkey. I see some reviewers complain about the pessimistic tone of the book, but if you read it closely, there is an arc. White DOES change over the course of the book, and he finds himself accepting where he is. Maybe aspects of life in his new surroundings isn't ideal, but after a while, things become familiar. There is a type of comfort in the familiar.

With that being said, if you like sarcastic, snarky humor, you'll love White's writing/thinking style. He doesn't sugar-coat things, but he delivers his angst with humor and a witty point of view. I come from a small town in Indiana, and while I had a long stay in Phoenix before making my way to SoCal, I found that I had MANY of the same thoughts as White. The first couple of years I lived in Phoenix, I would stop while outside and think, "I live someplace where there are palm trees. Weird." Just as White mentions in the book, I always associated palm trees with being on vacation. They were objects that existed in a destination--not HOME.

Look, it's a funny book that is a guy describing his first year living in the land of competition known as Southern California. It's great, and you might even learn something.

[Veldt Walker · Rating 5 out of 5]

So I was given this book by a good friend who disappeared for a while. So I held onto this book as a way to remember them. I started this book a couple times in the past. Now that I am a bit settled I have taken up reading again.

I recently have moved to the West Coast (British Columbia ) after living most of my Adult life in Quebec and Ontario so this book was a bit of a comfort to the adjustment. I still have a disconnect with people out here because of something I dub as west coast brain and mean hippies.

Reading this book was a comfort for that and I found it wrapped up nicely. Dave White has changed considerably since this book has been released. He is a different person for sure.

Though the language is very much of a time I would suggest this book to people who have moved to a whole new city and how the adjustment can be a process.

[Jay Daze · Rating 4 out of 5]

Dave White makes me smile. The 'diary' of his year of adjustment to L.A. (a collection of pieces numbered and loosey themed) this is a must listen for those fans of Linoleumn Knife who can't get enough of his wry junkyard dog voice. I totally urge those who want MORE of Dave to go to exileinguyvillebook.tumblr.com and buy his DIY recording of the book. It is pay as you can and is totally happy making - even a little wise.

[Jane · Rating 5 out of 5]

It may have taken me 2 months to read this book, but not because I wasn't enjoying it, I just don't have a lot of time to sit down and read. Anyway, I loved this book. Dave is hilarious. This book has been sitting on my shelf for a few years and I figured I'd donate it back to Goodwill after reading it, but nope, this one is a keeper. I'll probably read it again when I need a laugh.

[Jdetrick · Rating 4 out of 5]

It's a little dated, but still amusing. It's grumpy, and I appreciate that.

[Jenine Young · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was a fun, fluffy book. It will definitely not change the world by any stretch, but I enjoyed it. The author was self deprecating as well as ripping on every plastic person in Hollywood.

[Laura · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book was more challenging to read than I expected! Not a difficult read, but very gritty and immediate. Being based on the reports of the moment is both its strength and its weakness. Not much of a weakness!

[Maltoablativ · Rating 5 out of 5]

Very funny and great to listen to. You can get the audiobook for just a few bucks. Save White reads it and you want him to read it to you!

[Akiva ꙮ]

Not quite what I expected from the description. White used to write a column about living in West Hollywood apparently, and this is a compilation of his cranky/snarky columns.

Ultimately it's inoffensive but not that funny, and it couldn't hold my attention. If this sounds like your kinda thing, let me know---I'm planning to give away the copy I picked up at the used bookstore.

[R.J. Gilmour · Rating 2 out of 5]

White's book is a collection of short chapters about moving from Texas to Hollywood. The tone is light and fluffy written in a web based manner for people with really short attention spans. I wanted to like the book more than I actually did thinking it might be a witty as something like Why I Hate Saturn, but it really is just a collection of whiny thoughts by a a dot.com self indulgent film critic. Sadly, his anti-gay gay guy rants are really a dime a dozen and never rises to anything more than the grumbling of a depressed cynic.

[Maol Mhuire O'Duinnin · Rating 3 out of 5]

This book made me laugh a lot, but also question a number of times why I was reading it. The preface makes clear that reading this shouldn't be life-changing or anything, but rather that the book is actually a collection of email letters the author sent to various family and friends after moving from small-town Texas to the huge mega-opolis of LA with his boyfriend/ husband, specifically West Hollywood.

The humor is caustic and both critical of others and self-critical. The author saves himself by ranting about the indignities he has to deal with in everyday life (almost getting run over by SUVs, the weird behaviors and fashions of his fellow West Hollywood residents, aggravating publicists and others he deals with as a freelance writer, etc.), but also begrudgingly admitting that he is sometimes grossly unreasonable himself.

With chapter titles like "Anger," "Botulism," and "Murder," the book is, by turns, fascinating and repulsive. The author does an excellent job portraying the bizarre ways in which all different types of people, particularly gay men and celebrities, live in this part of LA. The author is not afraid to use swear words and other words a lot of people find offensive (re: the book's title), so be prepared. The only reason I wondered sometimes why I was reading this raunchy account was because I am leaning more toward the writings of folks like Thomas Merton lately, and thus far, Exile in Guyville is nothing like The Seven Storey Mountain.

[Karl · Rating 3 out of 5]

Let your inner curmudgeon loose and share Dave White's everyday adventures in Los Angeles. Meet Morocco Mole, Angry Parking Space Woman, the Woooo Girls, Dave2, Little Gay Shirts, Dress-All Stupid Queens, Mammo Tech Lady, Recently Spiritual Andy, Justin My Hot Straight Shirtless Downstairs Neighbor, Leonard Maltin, Parker Posey, Brittany Murphy, Shelley Winters, Sally Kellerman, HeteRobert, and perhaps most memorably Gay Voice Hepatitis Shades Publicist. If you've ever been to L.A. and hated it while secretly being perhaps just a little enchanted by it, this is the book for you. Dave White has a unique and very funny off-center voice.

[Nicole D. · Rating 5 out of 5]

Hilarious -
I discovered Dave White because he writes an American Idol blog which I look forward to each and every week.

Exile in Guyville did not disappoint. Dave chronicles his first year in the hell that is LA. Despite that fact that he has serious trouble adjusting, he never loses his keen sense of humor. There are many many laugh out loud moments.

I loved it!

Obviously, this book isn't for everybody. So if the title offends you, move along. But if you consider whining a hobby, and other people's crabbiness makes you laugh, you will love Exile in Guyville!

[Mark · Rating 4 out of 5]

Snarky, sweet and sometimes genuinely touching, EXILE is a fun, funny and fast read. It's like talking long distance with your pal who has moved away and calls you every day to check in. White's observations of LA life and its lifeforms are immediately recognizable and instantly entertaining. He retains his outsider status (somehow without becoming misanthropic) and makes the reader feel like an insider. In his forward, White claims to not have written a how to book on how to survive LA but ironically though his gift as a storyteller he had done just that.

[Jason · Rating 5 out of 5]

Ernie recommended this book to me and I cannot thank him enough for it. A series of short essays that started as weekly emails from the author to the folks back home, it details his experiences as a long-time Texan moving with his boyfriend to L.A., and all the culture shock that ensues. Ernie figured I'd appreciate it given my own Chicago-to-SF experiences, and he was right. Amazingly funny and right up the alley for anyone who realized they weren't in Kansas anymore... so to speak.

[Jason Craft · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book was originally a set of blog posts, but despite the conversational style, it has a cohesion to it that made it a satisfying read. White deals with culture shock and homesickness with a tone that strikes a good balance between snarky and self-searching. His banter with his boyfriend is cute and sometimes laugh-out-loud funny. Closes with a surprisingly affecting ending that will make you miss Brittany Murphy.

[The Katie · Rating 4 out of 5]

I read this book mostly in an air travel over a weekend trip. It is a quick and easy ready. I enjoyed the social commentary of the weirdos the author encounters while adjusting to his new home in LA. He references lots of music and books I am not familiar with, but somehow this adds to the charm of his character.

[Karen · Rating 5 out of 5]

Dave White is my hero. Th ere is nothing I do not love about this man. From the stories of big gay love, to his reviews on Movies.com, his articles in The Advocate & MSNBC, his livejournal posts and his set lists at The Eagle in LA (I will make it up there someday!) This book got the whole thing started. Extremely funny, you just want to spend the day hanging out with him and watching movies.

[Theanghellicone · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book was awesome. Granted it takes you till the second chapter to really like the author. he isn't winning any awards for being nice in the first chapter, and than you realize, oh he's just gonna keep bitching left and right til the book is over. i wanna see how this goes. and it's an awesome read.

[Drew · Rating 3 out of 5]

Entertaining and witty, but it gets boring hearing Dave White criticize everything and everyone. Eventually, the endeavor just goes too sour, with Dave not really being able to realize that there are good things in California, and that his endless need to pick apart everything around him means he can't enjoy any of it.

[Alvin · Rating 4 out of 5]

White's memoir of his first year in LA is totally one-dimenionsal. Fortunately, his dimension consists entirely of Snark. He wittily skewers Industry flacks, A Gays, and virtually everyone else who crosses his path. Given that there's no real plot or character development, the story does go on a little too long, but one has to forgive him because the world needs more dyspeptic skeptics.

[Jennifer Whiteford · Rating 5 out of 5]

I read this years ago, but am adding it now because I just finished listening to the audiobook. It is read by the author who, some say, has a voice like a cartoon dog. It made the book even more excellent. I laughed out loud a lot, and I think this book is responsible for me getting through the ugly, early days of winter without feeling crummy all the time.

[Elizabeth Harlan-Ferlo · Rating 5 out of 5]

Lauren handed me this book and told me I must read it. She was right. It was laugh out loud and perfect for the end of a long trip with much modes of transportation. Chances are you already know whether this book is for you by looking at the title. And it delivers baby, it delivers.