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Vegan Zombie Apocalypse
Fear not mankind, the omniscient God Necro proclaims that your tasty brains will be safe from the ravenous undead during the impending zombie apocalypse. Unfortunately for most of you, however, the enlightened zombie hoard plans to herd you like cattle on their potato plantations and use your fertile bodies to grow their specialized blood veggies.
Only by prostrating yourself before the Great Necro can you join forces with other faithful necros and defend humanity from the ever encroaching zombie invasion. But it won’t be easy, especially if you’ve just escaped from the vegfarm – and you already have the cattle brand on your forehead and the telltale potato vines sprouting from your body.
Bounty-hunting zombinators, flying cleaver-laden helicopters and cockrockets, will soon be hot on your trail as you race toward the Promised Land and the sanctuary that is known as the Republic of Texas.
Only by prostrating yourself before the Great Necro can you join forces with other faithful necros and defend humanity from the ever encroaching zombie invasion. But it won’t be easy, especially if you’ve just escaped from the vegfarm – and you already have the cattle brand on your forehead and the telltale potato vines sprouting from your body.
Bounty-hunting zombinators, flying cleaver-laden helicopters and cockrockets, will soon be hot on your trail as you race toward the Promised Land and the sanctuary that is known as the Republic of Texas.
322 pages, Paperback
First published April 16, 2013
2 people are currently reading
842 people want to read
About the author
Wol-vriey
70 books202 followersWol-vriey writes eXXXtreme horror fiction, and also some surrealist stuff.
To date, he has published over forty novels in both genres.
His horror novels include: EnterPAINment, LGBT, The Virgin, Marriage, Women, Nightmare Fuel 1 & 2, Haunted House XXX 1 & 2, and How To Succeed in Life.
On the surrealist side of things, he is the author of Vegan Zombie Apocalypse, Vegan Vampire Vaginas, Vagina Mundi, and the disturbing and unsettling Dr. Orgasm.
To date, he has published over forty novels in both genres.
His horror novels include: EnterPAINment, LGBT, The Virgin, Marriage, Women, Nightmare Fuel 1 & 2, Haunted House XXX 1 & 2, and How To Succeed in Life.
On the surrealist side of things, he is the author of Vegan Zombie Apocalypse, Vegan Vampire Vaginas, Vagina Mundi, and the disturbing and unsettling Dr. Orgasm.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 47 reviews
May 12, 2013
I will def review this. Wol is a fantastic writer. More people need to read his crazy stuff.
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So, my boss (a 65 year old lady "free spirit") is in town from California. Went to lunch and she asked what I've been reading. I told her about this and my other recent reads. I think she's putting me on a mental disability leave! WOOHOO! Mission accomplished! Thanks, guys! I'll send you a postcard from the Oregon State Hospital.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7Dnf1I...
------
So, my boss (a 65 year old lady "free spirit") is in town from California. Went to lunch and she asked what I've been reading. I told her about this and my other recent reads. I think she's putting me on a mental disability leave! WOOHOO! Mission accomplished! Thanks, guys! I'll send you a postcard from the Oregon State Hospital.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7Dnf1I...
May 3, 2013
I’ve been a fan of Wol’s for a while now. And let me tell you why. When he does his version of a genre, he destroys it and rebuilds it as his own. The man is like the Shiva of genre fiction. He did it to Steam Punk with Alice's Adventures in Steamland: The Clockwork Goddess, he did it to Noir with Chainsaw Cop Corpse, and now he’s doing it to Zombies with Vegan Zombie Apocalypse.
Let’s face it, zombie plots are beginning to get heavily recycled, and most of them are beginning to get stale. But, and this is important, listen to me, come closer, YOU HAVE NEVER READ A ZOMBIE BOOK LIKE THIS!!! It’s totally different from everything else out there. This is bizarro folks, and if you don’t know what bizarro is, crack open this book and take your first ride. Be sure to buckle your seatbelt though, because this book drives like it’s wasted, even though it’s stone sober.
Let’s face it, zombie plots are beginning to get heavily recycled, and most of them are beginning to get stale. But, and this is important, listen to me, come closer, YOU HAVE NEVER READ A ZOMBIE BOOK LIKE THIS!!! It’s totally different from everything else out there. This is bizarro folks, and if you don’t know what bizarro is, crack open this book and take your first ride. Be sure to buckle your seatbelt though, because this book drives like it’s wasted, even though it’s stone sober.
October 18, 2014
"It's the way of the world. Eat and be eaten."
Leave it to the strange and wonderful Wol-vriey to add a new twist to the flesh-eating-zombie genre.
And when I say twist, I mean REALLY twisted !
It's the future...and a damned bleak and scary one it is.
Humans are now humancows, and they're used to grow potatoes to feed the vegan zombies. Once the potatoes are ripe, it's bye-bye humancow.
Two of the female humancows manage to escape and are pursued by a horrific team of bounty hunters.
These military helicopters were 'choppers.' Each had four arms of zombie flesh grafted to its sides, each meat-hand gripping a monster meat cleaver. The four limbs were wired into the helicopter's central computer--a jacked-up human brain.
The cleavers slashed constantly at the ground as the choppers came on--the aircraft seemed to walk on them.
It gets even weirder when much of the action shifts to a thrilling climb up a giant beanstalk.
Haeven (sic) and Hell combine to create a nightmare on earth. One of the humancows is evolving into something very large with lots of teeth. Giant brains roam around eating zombies. And trust me...you don't even want to know what sponge rats are!
Once again, the author creates terrific, strong female characters, then tosses them right into the middle of the action to fend for themselves.
And...
This being Wol-vriey...expect more of the grossest sex scenes ever written.
While the story is wildly imaginative, I'm guessing this one is for a select audience only. Everything drips with bodily fluids...all types of bodily fluids. Bad things happen to everyone. You know it's a bad sign when you start to feel sorry for the rats.
Of all the books you should NOT read while eating lunch, this one is at the top of the list!
Leave it to the strange and wonderful Wol-vriey to add a new twist to the flesh-eating-zombie genre.
And when I say twist, I mean REALLY twisted !
It's the future...and a damned bleak and scary one it is.
Humans are now humancows, and they're used to grow potatoes to feed the vegan zombies. Once the potatoes are ripe, it's bye-bye humancow.
Two of the female humancows manage to escape and are pursued by a horrific team of bounty hunters.
These military helicopters were 'choppers.' Each had four arms of zombie flesh grafted to its sides, each meat-hand gripping a monster meat cleaver. The four limbs were wired into the helicopter's central computer--a jacked-up human brain.
The cleavers slashed constantly at the ground as the choppers came on--the aircraft seemed to walk on them.
It gets even weirder when much of the action shifts to a thrilling climb up a giant beanstalk.
Haeven (sic) and Hell combine to create a nightmare on earth. One of the humancows is evolving into something very large with lots of teeth. Giant brains roam around eating zombies. And trust me...you don't even want to know what sponge rats are!
Once again, the author creates terrific, strong female characters, then tosses them right into the middle of the action to fend for themselves.
And...
This being Wol-vriey...expect more of the grossest sex scenes ever written.
While the story is wildly imaginative, I'm guessing this one is for a select audience only. Everything drips with bodily fluids...all types of bodily fluids. Bad things happen to everyone. You know it's a bad sign when you start to feel sorry for the rats.
Of all the books you should NOT read while eating lunch, this one is at the top of the list!
Read
April 24, 2013Minions, take a deep breath and buckle up. I was offered a free copy in exchange for an honest review. So here it is.
Won't rate this book. Here's why:
Vegan Zombie Apocalypse is not a novel. Yes, it has the appearance of a novel. Yes, it is filled with words, which form sentences, which form paragraphs and so on. But it lacks basic characteristics of most "standard (successful) novels," so there's no point in critiquing it like one. I am certain the author's "experimental" approach will infuriate some while absolutely delighting others. Subjectivity, folks. This is a book where you will either learn to love the good and ignore the bad, or um... chuck the book into the nearest wall and maybe burn it.
Characterization? There is none. Intelligent story arc? Nope, doesn't exist. Tone and voice? Inconsistent and woefully sloppy towards the end. Plot/Execution? Juvenile, at best. But these are the criticisms I would write if was if I was judging Vegan Zombie Apocalypse the same way I'd judge a novel. I'll tell you honestly: it FAILS as a novel (which is, perhaps, the author's intent?) and were I to rate his work as such, I'd give it one and a half stars.
But there's the rub. I ADORED this stupid book. Holy fuck, did I enjoy it. I laughed out loud, snorted coffee from my nose, stayed up past 4am or more to devour the pages, and then gleefully recited several passages aloud to my weary boyfriend in the morning. Oh. My. God. There were sentences in this book that required mind-bleach. The narration was like uncontrollable projectile vomit. It spewed everywhere, lacking all focus and direction. Yet it was so irresistible, so uniquely brilliant in its childish absurdity, I could not help but be transfixed. I laughed with wonder and then with disbelief. After a third of the way in, the story morphed into this rabid, hysterical thing, and I couldn't decide whether the author was crying out for help or if he was secretly LAUGHING at me for choosing to read on. By the time the xombina's lemon tree sprouted to "Haeven," it seemed the author just stopped trying and the book bucked off the tracks and into a LSD-fueled funhouse where he took unrestricted creative license. Which is a shame, because too much "wtfery" can become monotonous, and even tedious to read.
Overall, I ENJOYED Vegan Zombie Apocalypse. It is the most original piece of fiction I've read all year. Wolv-riey's writing is addictive and his imagination is as great as it is expansive. What he gave me was an indulgent, greasy pile of nachos with all the artificial cheese & unhealthy, butt-burnin' fixin's. I got my face dirty and I really liked sinking my teeth into his world. I only wish he had not soured the taste by introducing the bizarre anti/pro-Christian elements! The religious subtext was the equivalent of say, dropping a sprig of parsley or a dollop of fancy crème fraîche on an otherwise guilty-pleasure like a plate of nachos. If you're gonna go campy, go camp ALL THE WAY. Don't start off on an absurd track and then slam the breaks to "get serious" or "halfway serious" or whatever the hell the author meant to accomplish by the story's conclusion.
So yeah. Would recommend this book for warped minds and tortured souls. If you're wanting literature, please don't read this book. But if you're like me and you enjoy grease, fat, and clogged arteries, then YES, Vegan Zombie Apocalypse is certainly for you! A true staple for bizarro fans. 4 out of 5 stars for pure entertainment factor. 1.5 stars for execution.
Won't rate this book. Here's why:
Vegan Zombie Apocalypse is not a novel. Yes, it has the appearance of a novel. Yes, it is filled with words, which form sentences, which form paragraphs and so on. But it lacks basic characteristics of most "standard (successful) novels," so there's no point in critiquing it like one. I am certain the author's "experimental" approach will infuriate some while absolutely delighting others. Subjectivity, folks. This is a book where you will either learn to love the good and ignore the bad, or um... chuck the book into the nearest wall and maybe burn it.
Characterization? There is none. Intelligent story arc? Nope, doesn't exist. Tone and voice? Inconsistent and woefully sloppy towards the end. Plot/Execution? Juvenile, at best. But these are the criticisms I would write if was if I was judging Vegan Zombie Apocalypse the same way I'd judge a novel. I'll tell you honestly: it FAILS as a novel (which is, perhaps, the author's intent?) and were I to rate his work as such, I'd give it one and a half stars.
But there's the rub. I ADORED this stupid book. Holy fuck, did I enjoy it. I laughed out loud, snorted coffee from my nose, stayed up past 4am or more to devour the pages, and then gleefully recited several passages aloud to my weary boyfriend in the morning. Oh. My. God. There were sentences in this book that required mind-bleach. The narration was like uncontrollable projectile vomit. It spewed everywhere, lacking all focus and direction. Yet it was so irresistible, so uniquely brilliant in its childish absurdity, I could not help but be transfixed. I laughed with wonder and then with disbelief. After a third of the way in, the story morphed into this rabid, hysterical thing, and I couldn't decide whether the author was crying out for help or if he was secretly LAUGHING at me for choosing to read on. By the time the xombina's lemon tree sprouted to "Haeven," it seemed the author just stopped trying and the book bucked off the tracks and into a LSD-fueled funhouse where he took unrestricted creative license. Which is a shame, because too much "wtfery" can become monotonous, and even tedious to read.
Overall, I ENJOYED Vegan Zombie Apocalypse. It is the most original piece of fiction I've read all year. Wolv-riey's writing is addictive and his imagination is as great as it is expansive. What he gave me was an indulgent, greasy pile of nachos with all the artificial cheese & unhealthy, butt-burnin' fixin's. I got my face dirty and I really liked sinking my teeth into his world. I only wish he had not soured the taste by introducing the bizarre anti/pro-Christian elements! The religious subtext was the equivalent of say, dropping a sprig of parsley or a dollop of fancy crème fraîche on an otherwise guilty-pleasure like a plate of nachos. If you're gonna go campy, go camp ALL THE WAY. Don't start off on an absurd track and then slam the breaks to "get serious" or "halfway serious" or whatever the hell the author meant to accomplish by the story's conclusion.
So yeah. Would recommend this book for warped minds and tortured souls. If you're wanting literature, please don't read this book. But if you're like me and you enjoy grease, fat, and clogged arteries, then YES, Vegan Zombie Apocalypse is certainly for you! A true staple for bizarro fans. 4 out of 5 stars for pure entertainment factor. 1.5 stars for execution.
December 6, 2013
When there is no more room in Haeven, the zombies and brains will fall to Earth!
Honestly....I have no idea how to rate this.....BUT HERE'S A REVIEW!
Is it better to be a zombie who harvests blood potatoes from human "cows" for sustenance? Or is it better to be a Necro that worship the very entity they consume? OR and hear me out, is it better to be a human-cow, drugged, enslaved, and planted with blood potatoes for the purpose of feeding and sustaining the Vegan Zombie way of life only to be made into meat and fed to other fellow human-cows? Don't like those choices? Maybe you would be better off as the rotting, putrefied, oozey, gooey, icky God Neck where you service the Necro's priest for the little fat fuck deems you the embodiment of Necro? No? Well then maybe with these choices you would choose an uprising! Would you stand against your own kind as part of the Necros and save the human race, or would you flee for freedom from the vegan zombies and escape your potato harvesting fate?
Wol-vriey you sick sick fuck. I mean this with love and respect of course. The Vegan Zombie Apocalypse is a viral, disgusting, gut wrenching tale of the Vegan Zombie's way of life Vs. the Necros way of life. It's almost like a fucked up Dr. Seuss' The Butter Battle Book......much more fucked up. I very much considered not finishing this book due to the graphic necro-maggot-bone-fucking-raping-gooey descriptive scenes. Seriously grotesque and it was hard to get through but I wasn't gonna let that stop me! That's right Wol-vriey I persevered and here is my review!
Both the Necros and the Vegan Zombies have secret confidential plans to which they each believe will benefit their struggle and bring a more pure religion to their sides. The Necros, have their deity but they also have their heretic, Abel Kane who as developed a pink serum that will cure all humancows of their potato afflictions and make them unusable for further cropping. This sounds all fine and dandy to Abel seeing as he wants to bring the human race back to the top of the food chain if you will. The Necros on the other hand find this to be a form of heresy and treason to the Flesh God Neck, and will stop at nothing to insure that his serum does not make it public. The Necros believe that Necro has created zombies for the purpose of worship and food and that by eradicating the zombies they in turn have gone against their religious beliefs that zombies are to be eaten by Necros and vice versa.
On the Vegan side of this war we have Dr. October. Dr. October has created in his lab two "humans" which he claims are reusable for the purpose of growing and harvesting blood potatoes for the zombies. These two humancows, 15m and 15f, are mate-able beings and will cut down harvest time by a lot. Perfect specimens created for Vegan Zombie sustenance that is growing thinner and thinner with every humancow they have to kill in order to harvest the potatoes. This sounds ideal, however 15f the female, has escaped and joined forces with our pink serum human cow saving heretic Abel whose serum comes with it's own very large drawbacks.
With all that being said, that doesn't even scratch the surface of all that goes on in this book. The adventures and the creatures encountered is again....a lot. There are so many changes that creatures undergo and so many places the characters travel that it can be a bit overwhelming as I have found with Wol-vriey's writing. This does not, however, take away from his amazing ability to tell a story. In my opinion, I feel like this book should have been broken up into a series. Smaller short books would make his writing much easier to digest and keep up with. All in all, once again, glad to have dabbled in Mr. Wol-vriey's head piece even if sometimes it hurts mine.
Honestly....I have no idea how to rate this.....BUT HERE'S A REVIEW!
Is it better to be a zombie who harvests blood potatoes from human "cows" for sustenance? Or is it better to be a Necro that worship the very entity they consume? OR and hear me out, is it better to be a human-cow, drugged, enslaved, and planted with blood potatoes for the purpose of feeding and sustaining the Vegan Zombie way of life only to be made into meat and fed to other fellow human-cows? Don't like those choices? Maybe you would be better off as the rotting, putrefied, oozey, gooey, icky God Neck where you service the Necro's priest for the little fat fuck deems you the embodiment of Necro? No? Well then maybe with these choices you would choose an uprising! Would you stand against your own kind as part of the Necros and save the human race, or would you flee for freedom from the vegan zombies and escape your potato harvesting fate?
Wol-vriey you sick sick fuck. I mean this with love and respect of course. The Vegan Zombie Apocalypse is a viral, disgusting, gut wrenching tale of the Vegan Zombie's way of life Vs. the Necros way of life. It's almost like a fucked up Dr. Seuss' The Butter Battle Book......much more fucked up. I very much considered not finishing this book due to the graphic necro-maggot-bone-fucking-raping-gooey descriptive scenes. Seriously grotesque and it was hard to get through but I wasn't gonna let that stop me! That's right Wol-vriey I persevered and here is my review!
Both the Necros and the Vegan Zombies have secret confidential plans to which they each believe will benefit their struggle and bring a more pure religion to their sides. The Necros, have their deity but they also have their heretic, Abel Kane who as developed a pink serum that will cure all humancows of their potato afflictions and make them unusable for further cropping. This sounds all fine and dandy to Abel seeing as he wants to bring the human race back to the top of the food chain if you will. The Necros on the other hand find this to be a form of heresy and treason to the Flesh God Neck, and will stop at nothing to insure that his serum does not make it public. The Necros believe that Necro has created zombies for the purpose of worship and food and that by eradicating the zombies they in turn have gone against their religious beliefs that zombies are to be eaten by Necros and vice versa.
On the Vegan side of this war we have Dr. October. Dr. October has created in his lab two "humans" which he claims are reusable for the purpose of growing and harvesting blood potatoes for the zombies. These two humancows, 15m and 15f, are mate-able beings and will cut down harvest time by a lot. Perfect specimens created for Vegan Zombie sustenance that is growing thinner and thinner with every humancow they have to kill in order to harvest the potatoes. This sounds ideal, however 15f the female, has escaped and joined forces with our pink serum human cow saving heretic Abel whose serum comes with it's own very large drawbacks.
With all that being said, that doesn't even scratch the surface of all that goes on in this book. The adventures and the creatures encountered is again....a lot. There are so many changes that creatures undergo and so many places the characters travel that it can be a bit overwhelming as I have found with Wol-vriey's writing. This does not, however, take away from his amazing ability to tell a story. In my opinion, I feel like this book should have been broken up into a series. Smaller short books would make his writing much easier to digest and keep up with. All in all, once again, glad to have dabbled in Mr. Wol-vriey's head piece even if sometimes it hurts mine.
January 27, 2014
Dense and beyond bizarre as always, Wol-vriey delivers on the zombie genre, taking it well into original territory with enough limbs, skin, weirdness, and action to satisfy and disgust all kinds of readers. There is a complicated religious theme in this book, too, interwoven with rich visuals and graphic scenes of violence and sexuality. One other thing I realized with this book is the twists and turns, the way it weaves and flows it completely unexpected, reminds me of those weird plot diagrams Harry Stephen Keeler used to chart out his novels. Fresh and rotten, I thoroughly enjoyed this book.
May 23, 2013
The world in Wolvie's mind, population Zombie. He does it again Wol-vriey drops a zombie story with out the boring "eat brains" clique. Instead we have Vegan Zombies who feed on blood potatoes, grown in Vegfarms.
As the story unfolds a multikey is stolen and the even more bizarre comes into play. Zombies with zippered private parts, doors in the shape of pussies, sex with maggots and even a Humansauras.
Fans of Wol-vriey will be struck again with wonders and new readers I suggest you hang on for one hell of a ride.
As the story unfolds a multikey is stolen and the even more bizarre comes into play. Zombies with zippered private parts, doors in the shape of pussies, sex with maggots and even a Humansauras.
Fans of Wol-vriey will be struck again with wonders and new readers I suggest you hang on for one hell of a ride.
April 18, 2013
Another offering by Mr. Wol-vriey. As always, mesmerizing, in his ability to let the crazy ideas unfold one from another seemingly without rhyme or reason, but with a compelling underlying logic, possibly the same one as used by the dreamworks as understood by classical psychoanalysis.
Still disoriented after finishing Wol-vriey's latest novella Guiltessa Dolores (wonderful, wonderful experience), I'm still puzzling over the man's genre. Bizarro horror? Surrealist thriller? Fabulist postmodernism? I can't really make up my mind, but I would certainly include 'fabulist' and 'surrealist' in the definition. 'Grotesque' too, of course.
...Is he an African Borges, the first to lay a trail of a specifically awesome regional mindbending subgenre? Or will he remain a Murakami/Pelevin/Kafka type of literary mutation, not representative of its region, but of his personality only?
Whatever the case may be, one knows that in each of his books there will be madness unfolding with deceptive ease, there will be a plot that one simply must finish, there will be cheerfully splatterpunk moments which one will persevere through, and there will be fascinating details upon detail which give solidity to the presented...fabulist surrealist bizarro horror postmodernist adventure.
And now for something completely different: the book in question. The zombie-necro civilization is bio-mechanical, using living organisms for to propagate itself. Sponge rats used to purify zombie blood; hookworms used as condoms; humans used to grow zombie food. Trimmed decorative plants in high-ranking zombie skulls. There are various factions struggling for dominance or just plain old survival - necro cultists and vegan zombies and food-humans. But a doomsday ecological catastrophe is on the horizon - figures project that badly managed human stocks will have been depleted utterly within a year. Will a heretic necro scientist manage to save the food-humans?
Quote from the book:
Dangling the wiggling potato between them like a pennant, he stared directly into Painfield's bulbous eyes. "I'm telling you this warden," he concluded grimly. "So you'll fully understand the gravity of the situation we're in. We need to get that womancow back, whatever the cost. And unharmed. The future of zombiehood depends on her." He stuffed the blood potato back into its hole in 15m’s chest.
“I understand,” Painfield said in a ghost’s voice. “We don’t catch her, and we’re back in the zombie stone age again.”
The thought, and its imminence, horrified her.
April 29, 2013
I was given a free copy by the author for review.I don’t know where to start. I thought I had pretty much seen it all and read it all when it comes to the zombie genre. I was wrong. Welcome to a world where zombies live on potatoes grown in human flesh, humans cannibalize those who have had their potatoes harvested, and sex as you know it is a thing of the past, but don’t forget your jar of condom worms in case you get lucky. Not for the easily offended, the faint of heart or those with a weak stomach. The gore and gross out factor is broken up by occasional humor. You won’t know whether to laugh or vomit. If you are a fan of the bizarre, or if you want a change of pace from your usual zombie fare, this is for you. I guarantee you have never seen zombies like these before.
October 16, 2013
WAY different take on the zompocalypse. VEGAN zombies? Wha....??? Well, Wol-Vriey makes this absurd plot line and makes it work like a motherfucking champ! Not to be missed if you are either A.) a bizarro fan or B.) a zombie fan. Pick it up, and while you're at it, get EVERYTHING by Burning Bulb Press. You'd be doing yourself a huge favor! ;-)
May 27, 2013
Pro's: This book is awesome.
Con's: There are none. This book is awesome.
Read it.
Con's: There are none. This book is awesome.
Read it.
May 1, 2013
I have been a zombie fan ever since I saw the “Night of the Living Dead” back when I was just a kid. You know, the old one, the original black and white. How could I resist when the author approached and asked if I’d be interested in reading this novel? Simple answer—I couldn’t.
This is one of those occasional novels you pick up where you are basically set up for one of two reactions. You either love it for its quirky fun… or completely hate it. There isn’t much room for the in between views. It’s definitely one of those that won’t be for everyone. For those of you who might be a fan of Edward Lee, trust me, you’ll love it. There are definitely a lot of gross details, and a lot of sex—not exactly what one imagines when picking up a novel titled “Vegan Zombie Apocalypse”. But no matter which side you end up falling toward, you gotta love the imagination that sits behind this story.
Welcome to zombie-land, where the zombies are vegetarian, but not just your old garden variety type flesh eaters (oh, wait, it is that kind, the garden variety part!). These zombies are veggie types. They eat blood potatoes. And where do they get these yummy sounding things? They grow them on people, of course, or better known in zombie-land as humancows. Humans are caught, the blood potatoes planted in their muscle, and then they are tended for the next five years on vegfarms until they are ripe for harvesting. Unfortunately, humancows don’t make it through the harvesting part, they go to the butcher, their bodies roasted and fed to the many humancows still planted and growing.
This is only one part of the quirky tale. We follow a humancow named Soil15. She is a little different from the other humancows, not quite as docile or locked into accepting her fate as living fertilizer. Eventually she finds a way to escape, which sets us on course for a whole lot of out-of-there experiences, including climbing a lemon tree, grown much like Jack’s magic beans, in Jack and the Beanstalk. This tree grows up to a zombie type heaven where....
And that’s all I’m going to tell you because no one would believe me anyway. It’s a fun story with a guaranteed part or two just waiting to gross you out. It brought out more than a couple of “ewwwws!” from me, let me tell you. But I still couldn’t put it down. As I said at the start, the author, Wol-vriey, has a great imagination and I’ll look forward to reading more from him in the near future. Enjoy.
This is one of those occasional novels you pick up where you are basically set up for one of two reactions. You either love it for its quirky fun… or completely hate it. There isn’t much room for the in between views. It’s definitely one of those that won’t be for everyone. For those of you who might be a fan of Edward Lee, trust me, you’ll love it. There are definitely a lot of gross details, and a lot of sex—not exactly what one imagines when picking up a novel titled “Vegan Zombie Apocalypse”. But no matter which side you end up falling toward, you gotta love the imagination that sits behind this story.
Welcome to zombie-land, where the zombies are vegetarian, but not just your old garden variety type flesh eaters (oh, wait, it is that kind, the garden variety part!). These zombies are veggie types. They eat blood potatoes. And where do they get these yummy sounding things? They grow them on people, of course, or better known in zombie-land as humancows. Humans are caught, the blood potatoes planted in their muscle, and then they are tended for the next five years on vegfarms until they are ripe for harvesting. Unfortunately, humancows don’t make it through the harvesting part, they go to the butcher, their bodies roasted and fed to the many humancows still planted and growing.
This is only one part of the quirky tale. We follow a humancow named Soil15. She is a little different from the other humancows, not quite as docile or locked into accepting her fate as living fertilizer. Eventually she finds a way to escape, which sets us on course for a whole lot of out-of-there experiences, including climbing a lemon tree, grown much like Jack’s magic beans, in Jack and the Beanstalk. This tree grows up to a zombie type heaven where....
And that’s all I’m going to tell you because no one would believe me anyway. It’s a fun story with a guaranteed part or two just waiting to gross you out. It brought out more than a couple of “ewwwws!” from me, let me tell you. But I still couldn’t put it down. As I said at the start, the author, Wol-vriey, has a great imagination and I’ll look forward to reading more from him in the near future. Enjoy.
April 17, 2013
When I read in Vegan Zombie Apocalypse that the zombies of the future had evolved to the point of becoming vegetarians, I realized I was experiencing something truly unique in the zombie genre. Of course, the zombies still posed a formidable threat to mankind, since the zombies use the fertile bodies of their human captives to cultivate their blood-infused veggies. Without giving too much away, Wol-vriey manages to give a whole new meaning to the phrase "brain eating zombies."
A thoughtful reader could easily make the observation that the underlying theme of Vegan Zombie Apocalypse is an indictment of religious intolerance and hypocrisy, but I doubt Wol-vriey even wants anyone to look at this novel too deeply, since the book's obvious goal is simply to entertain.
In conclusion, "Vegan Zombie Apocalypse" is one of the best bizarro novels I have ever read, but its appeal should extend far beyond the burgeoning bizarro fan base. Enthusiasts of Science Fiction, Fantasy and Horror, and especially zombie fiction lovers, should relish this book, even though it ventures into the dark realm of the extraordinarily grotesque at times... many times actually.
So, grab yourself a bag of blood-potato chips and a cold glass of Dr. October, take a seat on your favorite meat chair, and enjoy this effed up joy ride of an adventure.
A thoughtful reader could easily make the observation that the underlying theme of Vegan Zombie Apocalypse is an indictment of religious intolerance and hypocrisy, but I doubt Wol-vriey even wants anyone to look at this novel too deeply, since the book's obvious goal is simply to entertain.
In conclusion, "Vegan Zombie Apocalypse" is one of the best bizarro novels I have ever read, but its appeal should extend far beyond the burgeoning bizarro fan base. Enthusiasts of Science Fiction, Fantasy and Horror, and especially zombie fiction lovers, should relish this book, even though it ventures into the dark realm of the extraordinarily grotesque at times... many times actually.
So, grab yourself a bag of blood-potato chips and a cold glass of Dr. October, take a seat on your favorite meat chair, and enjoy this effed up joy ride of an adventure.
May 6, 2013
Oh my. I thought I liked bizarro fiction but man.. this was some seriously messed up stuff! It started off with the pussy purse.. well he didn't call it that, but I can't even type the 'c' word he used and continued on with some stomach rolling sexual acts and continued on further with.. You have to read it to believe it. My words wouldn't do justice to the filth that happened in this book
If you think you like zombies, food, and sex; this book will jump up twenty levels beyond what you thought could be imagined between those three things. I usually don't like to think of food and rotting things together. I most likely would have never even imagined those three things together. But this book forced me to imagine them together over and over and over with a dash of oh-my-god and plenty of you-have-to-be-frickin-kidding-me!
I actually had to read a light fluffy book after to cleanse my mind of the monstrosities of this book. Especially the scene with the initiates and the obese black woman laying on top of ... and spurting out....
Man, with all the nausea-inducing scenes, and just plain old whacked-out scenarios, I could not put this sucker down and finished reading every single, disgusting, depraved, and perverted word of it!
If you think you like zombies, food, and sex; this book will jump up twenty levels beyond what you thought could be imagined between those three things. I usually don't like to think of food and rotting things together. I most likely would have never even imagined those three things together. But this book forced me to imagine them together over and over and over with a dash of oh-my-god and plenty of you-have-to-be-frickin-kidding-me!
I actually had to read a light fluffy book after to cleanse my mind of the monstrosities of this book. Especially the scene with the initiates and the obese black woman laying on top of ... and spurting out....
Man, with all the nausea-inducing scenes, and just plain old whacked-out scenarios, I could not put this sucker down and finished reading every single, disgusting, depraved, and perverted word of it!
May 19, 2013
The author certainly has a way with words. This story is pretty action packed, and if you think you know whats coming you would be wrong. This read was very enjoyable, certainly different, i do love a good zombie sesh. This would make a seriously f*ked up film :) Great stuff.
May 4, 2013
This is an incredibly original and inventive work that is like nothing I have ever read before. In an alternate reality vegan zombies have taken over and are farming humanity for blood potatoes which are grown inside the human body. Once the blood potatoes mature the human is 'harvested' and fed to the others who are maturing toward their own inevitable harvest.
All the woman are called Soil and the men Earth, and we follow Soil 15 and Earth 15 in their fight for freedom. Another story takes us on a wild journey with Death and... well you're going to have to read it to find out what happens.
Although extremely ingenious and original the work contains some very bad language and graphic descriptions which aren't for everyone. If you're looking for a very blunt, unique and fascinating tale, with a very dark side, that stretched your imaginations and your good taste then this is definitely for you.
Not for the faint hearted. Go on...be a devil and take a look - I dare you.
July 30, 2013
The title makes this sound like a one-joke book but it actually goes a lot deeper than that. The premise is not that zombies eat people, but they enslave them and plant blood potatoes in them. It sounds simple, if a bit strange, but Wol-Vriey has created a fascinating and utterly twisted future society of zombies and humans and I can't really say too much more about the plot without spoiling it.
This is bizarro fiction at its most outrageous. Highly recommended!
This is bizarro fiction at its most outrageous. Highly recommended!
January 15, 2014
Disclaimer: I won this title in a GR giveaway.
I find zombies boring. Slow and lumbering, I lose interest; fast and dextrous, I get annoyed. Their mythology has been rehashed over and over again from a 45-year old movie that shows it's age. I've all but given up on these dull reanimations.
Little did I know that in the post post-zombie-apocalypse "worlderness" zombies have evolved to become vegetarians (so they grow their blood-veggies in humans, they still don't eat humans) and humans eat zombies...and humans! At least that's what Wol-Vriey's premise is for this wickedly subversive zombie tale that is nasty, disgusting, vulgar, obscene, misogynistic, did I say disgusting, and gleefully offensive (sometimes solely for the sake of being offensive. Ok, most times for the sake.) So it's humans against zombies, humans against humans, and zombies against humans by default. Or something like that. There's also the imperfect religion worshipping the imperfect god who imperfectly took over after God and Satan washed their hands of this imperfect world.
It would be easy to dismiss this book as a piece of zombie tripe (a delicacy in the book), but that would be denying the author his due. There is actually something quite ingenious going on here and author Wol-Vriey deserves a lot of credit. He not only plays by his own rules, but he has his brains and gets to eat them too. As he destroys the zombie sub-genre's time-honored rules, he pays homage to them by giving them a place in history as the "zombie stone age."
Unfortunately, the story ran out of steam and the last 60 pages just seemed like a convienent wrap-up to the story and left a foul taste in my mouth. But until that time, it was a hoot! This rating is not based on the skill of the author in terms of narration or characterization, but on the entertainment value I derived from his seemly endless imagination and his willingness to offend in the name of that entertainment. Take that for what it's worth.
Recommended for those people who have strong stomachs, find humor in the perverse, and like their blood-potatoes raw. All others, you've been warned.
I find zombies boring. Slow and lumbering, I lose interest; fast and dextrous, I get annoyed. Their mythology has been rehashed over and over again from a 45-year old movie that shows it's age. I've all but given up on these dull reanimations.
Little did I know that in the post post-zombie-apocalypse "worlderness" zombies have evolved to become vegetarians (so they grow their blood-veggies in humans, they still don't eat humans) and humans eat zombies...and humans! At least that's what Wol-Vriey's premise is for this wickedly subversive zombie tale that is nasty, disgusting, vulgar, obscene, misogynistic, did I say disgusting, and gleefully offensive (sometimes solely for the sake of being offensive. Ok, most times for the sake.) So it's humans against zombies, humans against humans, and zombies against humans by default. Or something like that. There's also the imperfect religion worshipping the imperfect god who imperfectly took over after God and Satan washed their hands of this imperfect world.
It would be easy to dismiss this book as a piece of zombie tripe (a delicacy in the book), but that would be denying the author his due. There is actually something quite ingenious going on here and author Wol-Vriey deserves a lot of credit. He not only plays by his own rules, but he has his brains and gets to eat them too. As he destroys the zombie sub-genre's time-honored rules, he pays homage to them by giving them a place in history as the "zombie stone age."
Unfortunately, the story ran out of steam and the last 60 pages just seemed like a convienent wrap-up to the story and left a foul taste in my mouth. But until that time, it was a hoot! This rating is not based on the skill of the author in terms of narration or characterization, but on the entertainment value I derived from his seemly endless imagination and his willingness to offend in the name of that entertainment. Take that for what it's worth.
Recommended for those people who have strong stomachs, find humor in the perverse, and like their blood-potatoes raw. All others, you've been warned.
October 20, 2013
DISCLAIMER: This book/eBook being reviewed was provided free of charge for an honest review.
Earlier in the year, I was offered this book in exchange for an honest review. Firstly, I took it on because it was about zombies, VEGAN zombies that exploded if they came in contact with human brains! That alone was enough to intrigue me. Secondly, this novel falls into the bizarro genre – one I had never sampled before, so I just knew I had to read this book. Thirdly, surprisingly, this book can also be considered dystopia, so I will be including it in my Dystopia Reading Challenge.
As for Vegan Zombie Apocalypse, did I like it?
Hmmmm… yes and no.
I really can’t categorise my feelings on it entirely. I am also finding it really hard to rate it.
Don’t get me wrong, I couldn’t put this book down. Imagine Plant’s vs. Zombies – the completely fucked up version. The concept was cool and the world building was amazing and completely plausible within what the author was attempting to convey to the reader.
I just found parts of it really hard to swallow. I am not a prude by any stretch of the imagination, but there were moments where I just couldn’t stomach what was going on. At times I also wondered if the author was just saying things in order to chock the reader rather than advance the story. If you find any of the following offensive, then this book is not for you:
*use of the word ‘c**t’
*faeces
*zombie rape
*sex that is more than two people doing it missionary style
*live critters used as tampons
BUT, as far as bizarro fiction goes, I think it was an excellent starter book.
The first half of this book is definitely better than the second half, when we go from plausible weird to LSD induced non-reality. Even still, I found I devoured this book in two days. Really, once you start this book you CANNOT put it down!
Overall, (after much deliberation) I am giving Vegan Zombie Apocalypse by Wol-Vriey 4 out of 5 stars. Thank you for managing to push me out of my comfort zone Wol-Vriey!
Earlier in the year, I was offered this book in exchange for an honest review. Firstly, I took it on because it was about zombies, VEGAN zombies that exploded if they came in contact with human brains! That alone was enough to intrigue me. Secondly, this novel falls into the bizarro genre – one I had never sampled before, so I just knew I had to read this book. Thirdly, surprisingly, this book can also be considered dystopia, so I will be including it in my Dystopia Reading Challenge.
As for Vegan Zombie Apocalypse, did I like it?
Hmmmm… yes and no.
I really can’t categorise my feelings on it entirely. I am also finding it really hard to rate it.
Don’t get me wrong, I couldn’t put this book down. Imagine Plant’s vs. Zombies – the completely fucked up version. The concept was cool and the world building was amazing and completely plausible within what the author was attempting to convey to the reader.
I just found parts of it really hard to swallow. I am not a prude by any stretch of the imagination, but there were moments where I just couldn’t stomach what was going on. At times I also wondered if the author was just saying things in order to chock the reader rather than advance the story. If you find any of the following offensive, then this book is not for you:
*use of the word ‘c**t’
*faeces
*zombie rape
*sex that is more than two people doing it missionary style
*live critters used as tampons
BUT, as far as bizarro fiction goes, I think it was an excellent starter book.
The first half of this book is definitely better than the second half, when we go from plausible weird to LSD induced non-reality. Even still, I found I devoured this book in two days. Really, once you start this book you CANNOT put it down!
Overall, (after much deliberation) I am giving Vegan Zombie Apocalypse by Wol-Vriey 4 out of 5 stars. Thank you for managing to push me out of my comfort zone Wol-Vriey!
May 19, 2013
First off, let me preface this by confirming this is my first book of the so-called Bizarro genre. Second, I would like to add that the fact this story deemed to be part of that genre does not mean a thing as part of the review. The story sounded interesting-zombies that can't tolerate the consumption of humans, so they instead use the humans to grow veggies-hence the name, vegan zombie. Admittedly, the plot had lots of potential, and the author was quite imaginative in the story and its narrative. In addition, as in many stories I like, no character was safe-ever!
However, the story became more and more tedious the further one delved into the book...instead of adding something just for the story's sake, it seemed the author tossed in unbelievable items simply for the sake of the shock value. I am not a novice to extreme writing, and have no problem with innuendo, development, artistic license, or language, as long as they further the entertainment of the story. When bizarre and inane characteristics are added just to mortify, the story suffers. There is bizarre, and then there is just plain bad. Sadly, even with the potential this story contained, I felt there was too much of the latter.
By the way, if swearing, explicit sex, or immoral storylines bother you...don't read this book. It doesn't bother me, but I need to find a better representative of the genre.
However, the story became more and more tedious the further one delved into the book...instead of adding something just for the story's sake, it seemed the author tossed in unbelievable items simply for the sake of the shock value. I am not a novice to extreme writing, and have no problem with innuendo, development, artistic license, or language, as long as they further the entertainment of the story. When bizarre and inane characteristics are added just to mortify, the story suffers. There is bizarre, and then there is just plain bad. Sadly, even with the potential this story contained, I felt there was too much of the latter.
By the way, if swearing, explicit sex, or immoral storylines bother you...don't read this book. It doesn't bother me, but I need to find a better representative of the genre.
December 16, 2013
This book is one serious mind fuck after another. at times I got a bit lost at who was eating who and whose side the characters were on. Be it necro, human, zombie, or humancow. This book is very graphic at times dealing with rape by a bone in a bed of maggots. Yeah thanks Wol-vriey that will be a picture I will never be able to get out of my mind. Over all the book was really hard to put down even with all the grotesque images it leaves you with. I have never read anything like it. if you love twisted books with no boundaries you'll love this Vegan Zombie Apocalypse. I only give it 3 stars because I couldn't stomach reading it again. Not because it was a bad book, I just couldn't deal with some of the graphic details. Neck makes me want to wash my brain with bleach and the thought of a cunt purse still has me a bit pained. overall I would suggest this book to anyone looking for a new take on zombies or just something out of the unique. This book is definitely unique.
I won this books for free through Goodreads in exchange for an honest review.
I won this books for free through Goodreads in exchange for an honest review.
January 29, 2014
Wol-vriey is easily the most 'bizarro' of the Bizarro writers. I read a lot of Bizarro fiction and it's easy to get jaded with all the weird things going on, but Wol-vriey will definitely pull anyone out of a I've-seen-it-all slump and Vegan Zombie Apocalypse is a good example of Wol-vriey's ability to push absurdism and Surrealism to the max and still pull off a good story.
The zombie apocalypse is a well-worn plot device that's been done to death, especially when the 2000s saw a boom in zombie fiction, movies, and television, but Wol-vriey gives us a warped, funhouse mirror landscape where the zombies are vegan with their own society in which humans are raised as produce. There is also religious themes going on, and at some point a kaiju monster...and it gets weirder.
I loved the story and always have a blast with Wol-vriey.
If you like zombies and bizarro, you HAVE to read Vegan Zombie Apocalypse!
The zombie apocalypse is a well-worn plot device that's been done to death, especially when the 2000s saw a boom in zombie fiction, movies, and television, but Wol-vriey gives us a warped, funhouse mirror landscape where the zombies are vegan with their own society in which humans are raised as produce. There is also religious themes going on, and at some point a kaiju monster...and it gets weirder.
I loved the story and always have a blast with Wol-vriey.
If you like zombies and bizarro, you HAVE to read Vegan Zombie Apocalypse!
May 8, 2013
Think of a world filled with zombies that eat semi alive potatoes that are grown in human bodies, human dinosaurs, a necro worshipping race of humans that use zombie meat for their every need and I do mean EVERY need. Throw in some were-zombies, a maggot eating deity and a goddess of death that has a face like a twisted sand shoe and you have Vegan Zombie Apocalypse.
What if zombies weren't the shambling human brain lusting type that we see in the movies but instead an intelligent race that worships science, and their enemy a religious cult of humans that worship a shape shifting god made of decaying meat and are just as monstrous as the zombies themselves?
This book takes what most of us think a zombie apocalypse would be like, and throughly warps it into a twisted, grotesque and completely addictive read.
What if zombies weren't the shambling human brain lusting type that we see in the movies but instead an intelligent race that worships science, and their enemy a religious cult of humans that worship a shape shifting god made of decaying meat and are just as monstrous as the zombies themselves?
This book takes what most of us think a zombie apocalypse would be like, and throughly warps it into a twisted, grotesque and completely addictive read.
June 18, 2015
First off no, no, no! Zombie maggoty sex was just a step too far for me. I expect zombie fiction to be gruesome, this was just - NO! Secondly the author clearly has no understanding of veganism.
As disgusting, putrid and sick as I assume the inside of the authors head must be. I imagine he set out thinking 'how offensive and blasphemous a book can I write?'.
The weirdness actually had a hint of Ballard about it only nowhere nearly as well written and lacking a decent plot ('vegan' zombies farming food from humans, humans eating zombies, rat tampons, literal fanny packs. Trust me you do not want me to go on).
As disgusting, putrid and sick as I assume the inside of the authors head must be. I imagine he set out thinking 'how offensive and blasphemous a book can I write?'.
The weirdness actually had a hint of Ballard about it only nowhere nearly as well written and lacking a decent plot ('vegan' zombies farming food from humans, humans eating zombies, rat tampons, literal fanny packs. Trust me you do not want me to go on).
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
May 7, 2013
This book is not for everyone. There is a lot of things that will shock, gross you out and anger you. The story was interesting and very different as you saw this world through different eyes all the way through. Once you thought you had a character to follow Wol-vriey changes it up on you. I highly recommend this one if you like Bizarro fiction because he nails all the elements of absurdness, satire, and the grotesque on the head with this one.
July 30, 2013
A very different zombie tale that's definitely not for most readers. Zombie sex, human+zombie sex, "things" and zombie rape... Very visceral and VERY weird. Wol-vriey hs a philosophy of WEIRRRD, Warp/Write Everything into Realistic Readable Distorted Dream Dimension Descriptions. I enjoyed the book but I know most people wouldn't enjoy some of the more... "creative" aspects of the story.
April 30, 2013
So wrong! There are images seared into my brain that will follow me forever (frickn thigh bone). Loved the twisted story line and the crazy crap that hits you out of nowhere.
Definitely an original story
Definitely an original story
June 16, 2013
this book was disgusting and intriging all at the same time. i really like the story and how different the zombies were from any i have ever read about. but this book is so not for the weak stomached lol
August 26, 2014
I tried to read this book without figuring out what it might mean. Just to enjoy the bizarro ride, but that wasn't possible. It will burrow into your mind until you are either deliciously insane or much smarter than you were before picking it up.
- Michelle Bowser
- Michelle Bowser
August 3, 2013
i think this book was better then his frist. this book put a intersting spin on zombies
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