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Solitude: The Science and Power of Being Alone
The average adult spends nearly one-third of their waking life alone. How do we overcome the stigma of solitude and find strength in going it alone? Whether we love it or try to avoid it, we can make better use of that time. The science of solitude shows that alone time can be a powerful space used to tap into countless benefits. Translating key research findings into actionable facts and advice, this book shows that alone time can boost well-being. From relaxation and recharging to problem solving and emotional regulation, solitude can benefit personal growth, contentment, creativity, and our relationships with ourselves and others. By learning what makes us better at spending time alone, you can use these principles to move toward your best possible self.
300 pages, Hardcover
First published April 18, 2024
50 people are currently reading
1015 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 21 of 21 reviews
May 17, 2024
Topic was interesting because I am an ambivert and wanted to know why I liked my aloneness in equal measure to my socialness. Didn’t answer any questions for me but gave me plenty to consider - especially all the very many ways we can be in solitude. Prompted me to pick up meditation again.
April 2, 2024
Excellent! If you need or crave "alone time," you're not weird. In fact, your need for solitude is perfectly normal.
Though written by three academicians, this book is highly readable for the rest of us. The tone is highly readable, and I enjoyed the self-deprecating asides and playful digs at each other made by the authors. Based on their own research and that of other experts in various fields, the authors make a strong case for the normalcy of the human need for time in solitude. People who have figured this out and regularly indulge in solitude are not psychopathic "loners," as popular culture has made them out to be. Time in solitude, in fact, is good for the human brain and psyche. Solitude in the natural world is even better, and the authors make many helpful suggestions on how to get this needed alone time.
Personally, I found this book highly affirming. As a creative writer, I need Alone Time every single day, or I get fussy. After reading this book, I will never again apologize for this need.
Highly recommended for those who struggle to justify their need for solitude or those who seek solutions for the anxiety and noise of our current reality.
Though written by three academicians, this book is highly readable for the rest of us. The tone is highly readable, and I enjoyed the self-deprecating asides and playful digs at each other made by the authors. Based on their own research and that of other experts in various fields, the authors make a strong case for the normalcy of the human need for time in solitude. People who have figured this out and regularly indulge in solitude are not psychopathic "loners," as popular culture has made them out to be. Time in solitude, in fact, is good for the human brain and psyche. Solitude in the natural world is even better, and the authors make many helpful suggestions on how to get this needed alone time.
Personally, I found this book highly affirming. As a creative writer, I need Alone Time every single day, or I get fussy. After reading this book, I will never again apologize for this need.
Highly recommended for those who struggle to justify their need for solitude or those who seek solutions for the anxiety and noise of our current reality.
March 19, 2024
A Fascinating Read
I found this an extremely positive and informative read. A great incite into the human psyche and scientific research surrounding 'solitude'.
The three researchers/authors have given such indepth accounts of our perceptions of alone time and experiences, both positive and negative. This book references the history of solitude, cultural and religious beliefs, self-reflection, relationships and mental and physical benefits.
This is a must read for those that enjoy their alone time as well as those who struggle to cope with their own company, an absolutely fascinating read for anyone.
Some of the sections were a little lengthy, however it is definitely something I would read again and again.
Thank you to Netgalley, the authors and Cambridge University Press for this ARC.
I found this an extremely positive and informative read. A great incite into the human psyche and scientific research surrounding 'solitude'.
The three researchers/authors have given such indepth accounts of our perceptions of alone time and experiences, both positive and negative. This book references the history of solitude, cultural and religious beliefs, self-reflection, relationships and mental and physical benefits.
This is a must read for those that enjoy their alone time as well as those who struggle to cope with their own company, an absolutely fascinating read for anyone.
Some of the sections were a little lengthy, however it is definitely something I would read again and again.
Thank you to Netgalley, the authors and Cambridge University Press for this ARC.
October 11, 2024
Audio. As a lifelong, hardcore solitary (one of those pesky solitaries who took "Draconian measures" to ensure her solitude), I own a substantial library of books on solitude. Most are, not surprisingly, memoir-types of books about temporary, religious, or other forms of solitude. This book, in contrast, is chock full of data analysis research--it's not a memoir or contemplative exploration. And that's great, especially if you are a researcher exploring solitude versus loneliness, new to a solitary life, curious about solitude, justifying that solo vacation from the spouse, and so forth. But as other GR reviewers have pointed out--if you are not new to the study of solitude, the conclusions of this book contribute virtually nothing to the conversation. And I mean nothing of any significance at all, sorry to reach that conclusion after so much work went into this project.
So, the authors, among other things, agree that there is big letter Solitude (religious hermitage, recluses, etc.) and then there is small-letter solitude (most commonly called "alone time," being a temporary state whether hours or months, maybe a few years). And that solitude isn't loneliness, etc. etc. etc. These observations are absolutely nothing new. Early on, the authors acknowledge but dismiss the "Singlecore Solitaries" (my phrase, not theirs) as taking severe "Draconian measures" (their phrase, not mine) to achieve their alone state. Draconian measures, for example, like "living 30 years in the woods" (their example). This was a particularly ironic example they offered as a Draconian measure to achieve solitude, because a few years back I published an essay online titled my 30 Years Living Alone on a Mountain (ha!), which briefly discussed my life as a committed solitary person. But I digress.
I suggest the authors of this book HAD to dismiss Singlecore Solitaries because we are anomalies in their research, as their research focus is on normal people living or seeking normal, companioned lives who want or need more alone time. But this type of solitude is the focus of at least a dozen or so other books, and hundreds of magazine articles and YouTube videos! Nothing new here. So what, then, does this book introduce that is new to the conversation about solitude, let alone the scholarship? Nothing. Except the authors have assembled a very large and impressive body of research into solitude, and that assemblage in and of itself does seem new.
But that's not enough.
What's STILL missing, unfortunately, and I would argue, what's most important to society with its increasing amount of people livign alone is research on the gap between Singlecore Solitaries who thrive in their Solitude and those who may start off thriving (maybe), but then they descend into caustic isolation--and often, unfortunately, pick up a weapon (keyboard or gun) and lash out at others as they descend into a level of darkness that you can label as you will. That kind of study about thriving alone versus disintegrating alone is what society needs to know, not more chatter about the importance of taking time for yourself in your marriage, or how people liked their newfound freedom post-divorce.
I suggest that the three authors of this book, without looking them up, are women who have experienced episodes of solitude in their lives, but have chosen to live companioned lives--and that, to me, injects clear bias into their research (thus, the Draconian measures statement). In the chapter of resilience in solitude, they ALLUDE to this missing data on those of us who willingly choose to live our entire adult lives alone, but they "don't go there." And I argue they should have.
What is it about "Singlecore Solitaries" that makes us crave lifelong solitude, without being psychotic, misanthropic, narcissistic, severely mentally traumatized, or neurotic. What is it about our brain structure (because I do believe there is a biological component at some level) and our emotional/intellectual state that we only thrive in Solitude or semi-Solitude? In other words, what is at the core of those of us who can only feel whole and complete in Solitude. And what can we teach others who struggle?
I am not alone, I'm sure, in having "nightmares" about being forced into marriage or having to live with someone. Because I can't get enough Solitude--and all I have is Solitude, albeit outside the mostly-silent online job, typical interactions of grocery shopping, a brief chat with someone in town, etc. Like other "Singlecore Solitaries," I don't run from or dislike people--I just can't get enough time alone in nature, or with my books, alone on my long walks, and so forth. Can't get enough of it! What makes us committed solitaries need the Solitude, despite the challenges. And unless one is wealthy, or chooses poverty, or subsistence level living, or chooses to live as a nomad (I'm not and I don't), there are tremendous challenges living alone, especially later in life. And believe me, sometimes it would be nice to share the stress when there's another repair required at the house or I must manage a health scare solo. And still I turn down offers of coupledom. Because Solitude is where I am whole. Where lies our resilience and our ability to thrive in Solitude, not because we must, but because it's our choice? That's the missing research, in my experience.
So yes, this book has its place in the literature of solitude, but it's not the place I was hoping it would occupy. That has yet to be written--and it should be. I'll keep waiting.
So, the authors, among other things, agree that there is big letter Solitude (religious hermitage, recluses, etc.) and then there is small-letter solitude (most commonly called "alone time," being a temporary state whether hours or months, maybe a few years). And that solitude isn't loneliness, etc. etc. etc. These observations are absolutely nothing new. Early on, the authors acknowledge but dismiss the "Singlecore Solitaries" (my phrase, not theirs) as taking severe "Draconian measures" (their phrase, not mine) to achieve their alone state. Draconian measures, for example, like "living 30 years in the woods" (their example). This was a particularly ironic example they offered as a Draconian measure to achieve solitude, because a few years back I published an essay online titled my 30 Years Living Alone on a Mountain (ha!), which briefly discussed my life as a committed solitary person. But I digress.
I suggest the authors of this book HAD to dismiss Singlecore Solitaries because we are anomalies in their research, as their research focus is on normal people living or seeking normal, companioned lives who want or need more alone time. But this type of solitude is the focus of at least a dozen or so other books, and hundreds of magazine articles and YouTube videos! Nothing new here. So what, then, does this book introduce that is new to the conversation about solitude, let alone the scholarship? Nothing. Except the authors have assembled a very large and impressive body of research into solitude, and that assemblage in and of itself does seem new.
But that's not enough.
What's STILL missing, unfortunately, and I would argue, what's most important to society with its increasing amount of people livign alone is research on the gap between Singlecore Solitaries who thrive in their Solitude and those who may start off thriving (maybe), but then they descend into caustic isolation--and often, unfortunately, pick up a weapon (keyboard or gun) and lash out at others as they descend into a level of darkness that you can label as you will. That kind of study about thriving alone versus disintegrating alone is what society needs to know, not more chatter about the importance of taking time for yourself in your marriage, or how people liked their newfound freedom post-divorce.
I suggest that the three authors of this book, without looking them up, are women who have experienced episodes of solitude in their lives, but have chosen to live companioned lives--and that, to me, injects clear bias into their research (thus, the Draconian measures statement). In the chapter of resilience in solitude, they ALLUDE to this missing data on those of us who willingly choose to live our entire adult lives alone, but they "don't go there." And I argue they should have.
What is it about "Singlecore Solitaries" that makes us crave lifelong solitude, without being psychotic, misanthropic, narcissistic, severely mentally traumatized, or neurotic. What is it about our brain structure (because I do believe there is a biological component at some level) and our emotional/intellectual state that we only thrive in Solitude or semi-Solitude? In other words, what is at the core of those of us who can only feel whole and complete in Solitude. And what can we teach others who struggle?
I am not alone, I'm sure, in having "nightmares" about being forced into marriage or having to live with someone. Because I can't get enough Solitude--and all I have is Solitude, albeit outside the mostly-silent online job, typical interactions of grocery shopping, a brief chat with someone in town, etc. Like other "Singlecore Solitaries," I don't run from or dislike people--I just can't get enough time alone in nature, or with my books, alone on my long walks, and so forth. Can't get enough of it! What makes us committed solitaries need the Solitude, despite the challenges. And unless one is wealthy, or chooses poverty, or subsistence level living, or chooses to live as a nomad (I'm not and I don't), there are tremendous challenges living alone, especially later in life. And believe me, sometimes it would be nice to share the stress when there's another repair required at the house or I must manage a health scare solo. And still I turn down offers of coupledom. Because Solitude is where I am whole. Where lies our resilience and our ability to thrive in Solitude, not because we must, but because it's our choice? That's the missing research, in my experience.
So yes, this book has its place in the literature of solitude, but it's not the place I was hoping it would occupy. That has yet to be written--and it should be. I'll keep waiting.
August 27, 2024
(Hoopla) Solid book on the benefits of solitude. I think it I meant to persuade about the benefits of solitude, rather than qualitatively getting the most out of solitude. However, authors dropped a few gems:
: autonomy and solitude have a twin power giving rise to authenticity
: authenticity results in lower stress and depression
: with solitude comes time to reflect on one’s genuine values (2020 pandemic led to a number of criminal defense attorneys leaving the field as they began to reflect on what they really wanted)
: BENEFITS OF SOLITUDE (relate to yourself, talk to yourself, organize yourself, regulate your emotions, routines and attention)
: I am a horse for a single harness (Einstein)
: how we see is more important than where we look🤔
: the ability to appreciate yourself makes it easier to connect with others; connection to self is the foundation for connection with others
: when men are merely submerged in a mass of impersonal human beings, pushed around by automatic forces, they lose their true humanity, their integrity, their ability to love, their capacity for self-determination (Merton)
: wonderful definition of mindsets (core beliefs or assumptions we have about a domain or category of things that orient us to a particular set of expectations, explanations and goals)
: mindsets help us simply a complex reality, by orienting our thinking
: with time spent in solitude folks work to achieve three (3) things: competence, autonomy and self-growth (each plays a more prominent role depending on a person’s age)
: folks that self identify as being good in solitude indicate that they are OPTIMISTIC, HAVE A GROWTH MINDSET, REFLECT ON SELF-COMPASSION, ARE CURIOSITY, AND PRESENT IN THE MOMENT
: close contacts should range between 1-6
: curiosity is lust of the mind
: doing (pursuing goals and feeling good about accomplishments) versus being (time to explore and develop ideas about ourselves in relation to the world)
: autonomy and solitude have a twin power giving rise to authenticity
: authenticity results in lower stress and depression
: with solitude comes time to reflect on one’s genuine values (2020 pandemic led to a number of criminal defense attorneys leaving the field as they began to reflect on what they really wanted)
: BENEFITS OF SOLITUDE (relate to yourself, talk to yourself, organize yourself, regulate your emotions, routines and attention)
: I am a horse for a single harness (Einstein)
: how we see is more important than where we look🤔
: the ability to appreciate yourself makes it easier to connect with others; connection to self is the foundation for connection with others
: when men are merely submerged in a mass of impersonal human beings, pushed around by automatic forces, they lose their true humanity, their integrity, their ability to love, their capacity for self-determination (Merton)
: wonderful definition of mindsets (core beliefs or assumptions we have about a domain or category of things that orient us to a particular set of expectations, explanations and goals)
: mindsets help us simply a complex reality, by orienting our thinking
: with time spent in solitude folks work to achieve three (3) things: competence, autonomy and self-growth (each plays a more prominent role depending on a person’s age)
: folks that self identify as being good in solitude indicate that they are OPTIMISTIC, HAVE A GROWTH MINDSET, REFLECT ON SELF-COMPASSION, ARE CURIOSITY, AND PRESENT IN THE MOMENT
: close contacts should range between 1-6
: curiosity is lust of the mind
: doing (pursuing goals and feeling good about accomplishments) versus being (time to explore and develop ideas about ourselves in relation to the world)
did-not-finish
February 9, 2025DNF'd around 40%
This is a fine book, but if you've already read a lot about solitude and naturally enjoy being alone I doubt you'll gain anything new from it. I stopped reading once I realized that. There was something oddly surface level about it all, and it felt so repetitive and dull. I think that in trying so hard to define solitude and the varieties of it the authors managed to somehow leech the depth out of the topic. There was too much jumping around while also seeming not to go anywhere. Would recommend other books (including some that they mention!) for a more interesting reading experience on the subject, like-- Journal of a Solitude, Solitude: A Return to the Self, Alone: Reflections on Solitary Living or even Thinking Through Loneliness (which does also distinguish solitude from loneliness).
I may try to go back and finish this one day since I did buy it, but for now it's not what I'm looking for.
This is a fine book, but if you've already read a lot about solitude and naturally enjoy being alone I doubt you'll gain anything new from it. I stopped reading once I realized that. There was something oddly surface level about it all, and it felt so repetitive and dull. I think that in trying so hard to define solitude and the varieties of it the authors managed to somehow leech the depth out of the topic. There was too much jumping around while also seeming not to go anywhere. Would recommend other books (including some that they mention!) for a more interesting reading experience on the subject, like-- Journal of a Solitude, Solitude: A Return to the Self, Alone: Reflections on Solitary Living or even Thinking Through Loneliness (which does also distinguish solitude from loneliness).
I may try to go back and finish this one day since I did buy it, but for now it's not what I'm looking for.
November 29, 2025
This was so great! When I was using a weekly bullet journal I used to track my moments of solitude and experienced it as something very positive that allowed me to rest and connect to my sense of self. I enjoyed seeing the emerging research supporting this feeling.
I thought the writing was excellent - clear, personable, and often funny. It could’ve been a touch shorter or more concise in places, but overall I really liked reading this.
One highlight for me was the concept of the solitude compass, with each ‘direction’ serving as metaphor for a different positive function of solitude. I also found the section on solitude in nature really lovely.
I thought the writing was excellent - clear, personable, and often funny. It could’ve been a touch shorter or more concise in places, but overall I really liked reading this.
One highlight for me was the concept of the solitude compass, with each ‘direction’ serving as metaphor for a different positive function of solitude. I also found the section on solitude in nature really lovely.
June 25, 2024
This was recommended by someone else in the reviews for Anthony Storr's Solitude, which is also referenced in this book. I was expecting this book to be a little better. But I think I can give it one more star than I gave that one.
I enjoyed it? I didn't really enjoy it. It's exhausting to read about solitude from the perspective of people who don't get it. Everyone needs moxie to endure solitude. Solitude is something to endure and practice at. Whatever. Just fuck off. There's a lot of people out here for whom it's as normal as drinking water.
There was some article I read in 2017, or thereabouts, about a youngish or middle-aged black man sharing his experiences in solitary confinement for _many_ years. They were so eye opening, and I think "grit" or something like that was mentioned. He seemed to really embrace the experience, even though it was not out of choice. He railed against it in the beginning. I believe that. But I couldn't find any mention of it in this book. Not that you have to mention everything, but it would have been a worthy contrast to the solitary confinement stuff that was mentioned.
Glad that Wolstonecraft, Sarton, Chopin, and Woolf were mentioned, along with the eye-rollingly exasperating experience we all have of being alone as female (or looking female in my case) and constantly being interrupted or scorned for it. OMG yes I'm reading a book alone, please don't tell me you like my hat. Fuck off. As if because you're giving someone a compliment, you have the right to their attention.
In some cultures quietude is respected, which they mention in the book-- the difference between quiet, solitude, and quietude. I see it something like, people together in a library, all independently doing their thing and being as unobtrusive to others as they can. Respect. We share the space, the air, the resources, the light, the life. And why not? Why shouldn't we enjoy the company of other creatures and share all this life and time together without being all up in each other's face?
Enjoyed the little nugget about the woman who spent a lot of time sitting with herself until she turned things around. Exactly. But this isn't necessarily a skill in being alone. It's a problem solving skill. Requires at the very least some time to think, whether that's alone or in quiet, or some other space that's non-demand. I can say this was the only way I could get through childhood. I had to figure out bullies, family, school, all manner of things to get to sleep and peace of mind. I don't recommend any other way, like distraction or drug numbing, because it only exacerbates the real issue. But anyway, that's not the point of this review. Which actually has no point. Did you know that the third law of thermodynamics postulates the destruction of all things anyway? So all this life is extra. And I'm going to be pretty fucking extra, tyvm.
Did this research show anyone who chose to move away from the friends they had to the much better experience of not having those people around? I got so sick of this person (woman, if you have to know) who wanted to be friends again after some 20, 25 years. We'd known each other in high school. Every month or week or so, another long text or whatever, just what ends up feeling like, over the long course of life, pointless drivel. Ok, now you're seeing someone. Now your work is really cool and interesting. Great. I mean it's not actually boring or unexciting, but you go do you, and have your life and enjoy it. I don't particularly need updates or whatever, though I did enjoy it. It's just that I enjoyed _not_ receiving those so much more. So I have for maybe the first time ever blanked someone. I've been on the receiving end of this many times and always (always) railed against it, hated them, tried to think of those people as bad and never-friends. But this experience feeling it myself has changed me. I love them anyway. Maybe more? Because I thank them now for freeing me. Eventually every time a break occurred, I have felt so much fresher and more alive for it. Similar to that person in solitary who railed against it at first and then genuinely enjoyed it. Choice is super important. The lack of choice. As well as the choice to turn yourself around.
I enjoyed it? I didn't really enjoy it. It's exhausting to read about solitude from the perspective of people who don't get it. Everyone needs moxie to endure solitude. Solitude is something to endure and practice at. Whatever. Just fuck off. There's a lot of people out here for whom it's as normal as drinking water.
There was some article I read in 2017, or thereabouts, about a youngish or middle-aged black man sharing his experiences in solitary confinement for _many_ years. They were so eye opening, and I think "grit" or something like that was mentioned. He seemed to really embrace the experience, even though it was not out of choice. He railed against it in the beginning. I believe that. But I couldn't find any mention of it in this book. Not that you have to mention everything, but it would have been a worthy contrast to the solitary confinement stuff that was mentioned.
Glad that Wolstonecraft, Sarton, Chopin, and Woolf were mentioned, along with the eye-rollingly exasperating experience we all have of being alone as female (or looking female in my case) and constantly being interrupted or scorned for it. OMG yes I'm reading a book alone, please don't tell me you like my hat. Fuck off. As if because you're giving someone a compliment, you have the right to their attention.
In some cultures quietude is respected, which they mention in the book-- the difference between quiet, solitude, and quietude. I see it something like, people together in a library, all independently doing their thing and being as unobtrusive to others as they can. Respect. We share the space, the air, the resources, the light, the life. And why not? Why shouldn't we enjoy the company of other creatures and share all this life and time together without being all up in each other's face?
Enjoyed the little nugget about the woman who spent a lot of time sitting with herself until she turned things around. Exactly. But this isn't necessarily a skill in being alone. It's a problem solving skill. Requires at the very least some time to think, whether that's alone or in quiet, or some other space that's non-demand. I can say this was the only way I could get through childhood. I had to figure out bullies, family, school, all manner of things to get to sleep and peace of mind. I don't recommend any other way, like distraction or drug numbing, because it only exacerbates the real issue. But anyway, that's not the point of this review. Which actually has no point. Did you know that the third law of thermodynamics postulates the destruction of all things anyway? So all this life is extra. And I'm going to be pretty fucking extra, tyvm.
Did this research show anyone who chose to move away from the friends they had to the much better experience of not having those people around? I got so sick of this person (woman, if you have to know) who wanted to be friends again after some 20, 25 years. We'd known each other in high school. Every month or week or so, another long text or whatever, just what ends up feeling like, over the long course of life, pointless drivel. Ok, now you're seeing someone. Now your work is really cool and interesting. Great. I mean it's not actually boring or unexciting, but you go do you, and have your life and enjoy it. I don't particularly need updates or whatever, though I did enjoy it. It's just that I enjoyed _not_ receiving those so much more. So I have for maybe the first time ever blanked someone. I've been on the receiving end of this many times and always (always) railed against it, hated them, tried to think of those people as bad and never-friends. But this experience feeling it myself has changed me. I love them anyway. Maybe more? Because I thank them now for freeing me. Eventually every time a break occurred, I have felt so much fresher and more alive for it. Similar to that person in solitary who railed against it at first and then genuinely enjoyed it. Choice is super important. The lack of choice. As well as the choice to turn yourself around.
October 29, 2024
Interesting book. A lot of inspiring, thought-provoking research and insights in this one. Especially since this is something that seems to be in alarmingly short supply in our current culture- people making time for being truly alone with themselves and their own thoughts without any sort of distraction (aka, reaching for a cell phone or tablet in every moment of boredom or pause).
The problem is, always filling every moment in which one can be alone with themselves and their own thoughts with, instead, delving into a screen, robs us of much. Some of what that can include is knowing ourselves well, innovative and creative thinking, the ability to feel calmer and more emotionally stable, etc.
So this was a great book in that sense, in terms of a reminder of the importance of making this space in our lives regularly (ideally every day).
The problem is, always filling every moment in which one can be alone with themselves and their own thoughts with, instead, delving into a screen, robs us of much. Some of what that can include is knowing ourselves well, innovative and creative thinking, the ability to feel calmer and more emotionally stable, etc.
So this was a great book in that sense, in terms of a reminder of the importance of making this space in our lives regularly (ideally every day).
July 14, 2024
I really enjoyed this book and the only shame for me was that my copy was an audiobook, as I’ve realised that it’s a different experience listening to a nonfiction audiobook and doesn’t suit me as well as printed or kindle. However, saying that… I loved the positive approach to solitude that the authors had, which is refreshing. Solitude is not loneliness! It can be extremely beneficial! I liked that the research was qualitative and found the participant quotes interesting. The fact that some of it is about solitude during the pandemic is of particular interest to me as that’s my area of research interest, too. So now I’m off to find a written copy that I can read and cover with highlighter pen.
July 21, 2025
I am ambivalent about this book, though I'd give it 3.5 stars because it's a bit better than just a 3-star average rating.
As someone who is learning to embrace the power and benefits of solitude I found this book helpful but also too academic. What did I expect though? That's pretty much how the book is described. The authors do include many anecdotes and observations from lived experience which makes it more accessible and human.
If you are already committed to the value and benefits of solitude, I don't know that you'll find anything new here. But if, like me, you struggle with it, you may find some helpful insight here to shift your perspective.
As someone who is learning to embrace the power and benefits of solitude I found this book helpful but also too academic. What did I expect though? That's pretty much how the book is described. The authors do include many anecdotes and observations from lived experience which makes it more accessible and human.
If you are already committed to the value and benefits of solitude, I don't know that you'll find anything new here. But if, like me, you struggle with it, you may find some helpful insight here to shift your perspective.
May 3, 2025
My impression is this book is geared towards people who don't spend much time alone and would like to know about the benefits. I'm quite well versed in solitude, being quite an introvert and living alone as an older retired adult. That said, there were a few things I appreciated and would say its a good introduction for anyone who wants to learn more about solitude.
July 27, 2024
I want to give this 5 stars, so I did. It drove some good ideas for how I spend time in solitude.
I felt they could have improved the book with some best practices. Maybe they could develop a survey tool that would suggest solitude activities based on your current goals and solitude strategies.
I felt they could have improved the book with some best practices. Maybe they could develop a survey tool that would suggest solitude activities based on your current goals and solitude strategies.
July 29, 2024
The power of "solitude" is self-evident in my opinion. Just like the brain needs "solitude" hours, the mind too. The book cried out loudly about the "power", less about "science". I wish it was the other way around.
January 3, 2025
I listened to this as an audiobbook, which was very helpful. I think I would have found it harder to read as a text as a bit dry and just full of information. But the narrator was very good, and it felt like listening to an interesting lecture.
February 4, 2025
Up to date research on the benefits (and drawbacks) to solitude. No longer is the desire for solitude considered a negative, but more a positive need, particularly in our current stressed full environments!
Well written by three female researchers, who thankfully list all their research and data.
Well written by three female researchers, who thankfully list all their research and data.
September 23, 2025
The message is good, well supported, but awfully lengthy and it ends up being very repetitive. I appreciate the transparency about the sources and the reframing of loneliness, the intercultural analysis. But overall, the book should've been a hundred pages shorter.
August 8, 2024
Solitude is not the same as loneliness! Such an amazing and insightful distinction. I highly recommend this book.
Read
September 13, 2024At around 70%, decided not to finish.
Excited about the topic of the book, but this is not what I think it would be.
Most of arguments are all based on anecdotal evidence.
Excited about the topic of the book, but this is not what I think it would be.
Most of arguments are all based on anecdotal evidence.
December 18, 2024
An interesting, well researched and easy read. I found the sections on emotions and solitude across the life span most interesting.
August 19, 2024
Great balance of science, personal story and history. I find myself noticing when and how I spend time by myself more, appreciating it and really using it to refresh.
With so much talk about a “loneliness epidemic” in the media, this book stands out, as it asks us to consider the potential benefits of time alone. Far from discounting mental health concerns, it points to ways in which we might take better care of ourselves. Pulling from rich and varied sources, it makes a strong case for specific ways we might use solitude to build inner strength and find peace.
With so much talk about a “loneliness epidemic” in the media, this book stands out, as it asks us to consider the potential benefits of time alone. Far from discounting mental health concerns, it points to ways in which we might take better care of ourselves. Pulling from rich and varied sources, it makes a strong case for specific ways we might use solitude to build inner strength and find peace.
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