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The Light of His Eyes: Journeying from Self-Contempt to the Father's Delight
Due to life's wounds, many experience a disordered self-image. Bound by pain and fear, they block God's merciful light, love, and forgiveness from entering into their hearts.
Here is the book that will help set you free and open your thirsty soul to receive the torrents of God's compassion and healing.
Each passage is akin to the stroke of a paintbrush on the canvas of an icon, revealing the beauty of God's Word and His compassion at work even in the seemingly mundane events of our lives. These masterful reflections are ideal for reading time in Adoration or during your daily meditation.
Mother Iliana explains that the Word who spoke "You are the light of the world" to His disciples speaks this same word to each of us, His children, who are bound by the darkness of self-rejection. It is in the Father's gaze of love that you will discover who you really His own beloved child, an heir to His kingdom, the very light of His eyes.
Through Mother Iliana's "practical mysticism," you will also
The gift that will transform your lifeYour wound that most needs healing -- and the cureHow poverty of spirit prepares you to receive God's richesWhat attracts God to you (You will be surprised!)One of the highest forms of prayer that you often forget (Can you guess?)By the hand of God, you will experience how the pain of your suffering leads to a "monsoon" of love. Above all, you will see how the Father delights in you and waits for you, His beloved child, simply to rest in His arms and gaze into the healing light of His eyes.
The Father's own light is within you, Mother Iliana shares, a light that radiates to a suffering world. Your story, which is unique and riveting and worth telling, is your entry point into a truly personal relationship with a God who penetrates the very heart of your wounds and waits for you to encounter Him through them and experience His intimate love and healing.
Here is the book that will help set you free and open your thirsty soul to receive the torrents of God's compassion and healing.
Each passage is akin to the stroke of a paintbrush on the canvas of an icon, revealing the beauty of God's Word and His compassion at work even in the seemingly mundane events of our lives. These masterful reflections are ideal for reading time in Adoration or during your daily meditation.
Mother Iliana explains that the Word who spoke "You are the light of the world" to His disciples speaks this same word to each of us, His children, who are bound by the darkness of self-rejection. It is in the Father's gaze of love that you will discover who you really His own beloved child, an heir to His kingdom, the very light of His eyes.
Through Mother Iliana's "practical mysticism," you will also
The gift that will transform your lifeYour wound that most needs healing -- and the cureHow poverty of spirit prepares you to receive God's richesWhat attracts God to you (You will be surprised!)One of the highest forms of prayer that you often forget (Can you guess?)By the hand of God, you will experience how the pain of your suffering leads to a "monsoon" of love. Above all, you will see how the Father delights in you and waits for you, His beloved child, simply to rest in His arms and gaze into the healing light of His eyes.
The Father's own light is within you, Mother Iliana shares, a light that radiates to a suffering world. Your story, which is unique and riveting and worth telling, is your entry point into a truly personal relationship with a God who penetrates the very heart of your wounds and waits for you to encounter Him through them and experience His intimate love and healing.
112 pages, Kindle Edition
Published July 18, 2023
29 people are currently reading
136 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 16 of 16 reviews
November 8, 2023
4 stars because there was some theology that felt a bit unclear. I’m certain the author would affirm the Church’s teachings, just some phrasing made me a bit uncomfy in chapter 4 I believe.
Overall, a really beautiful book. If you’ve struggled with self-hatred this is a good book for you to read. If you’ve struggled with chronic pain this is a good book for you to read. It’s beautiful to read the work of a woman so steeped in the Divine Office—the Scriptures pervade her work as they pervade her monastic life. She’s the kind of author you’d love to have a cup of coffee with.
There were some really heavy hitting quotes from this book. I might add them later.
Chapters 6, 7 and 8 were my favorite and really made me think. There’s things to pray about there! Blood and water imagery always speaks to me. The imagery of blindness was cool:
“sometimes the Lord is acting so much in our lives that we can’t seem to see anything at all. We are blinded and overwhelmed by His rays. With our heads down…we think we are in total darkness—but in fact, He is all around us.”
I recommend this book to people to read in Holy Hour cause it’s pretty short. I read a chapter before bed, it’s not very long.
The Eastern Catholic theology is stunningly beautiful and the author does such a good job making the book accessible to us Latins but still feels Eastern. The icons are gorgeous! I believe she made them herself!! I really enjoyed the icons. She also adds short poems before the chapters which was fun.
I enjoyed this book. I think I’ll read it before bed again in a year or two. If you wanna borrow it lmk!
Overall, a really beautiful book. If you’ve struggled with self-hatred this is a good book for you to read. If you’ve struggled with chronic pain this is a good book for you to read. It’s beautiful to read the work of a woman so steeped in the Divine Office—the Scriptures pervade her work as they pervade her monastic life. She’s the kind of author you’d love to have a cup of coffee with.
There were some really heavy hitting quotes from this book. I might add them later.
Chapters 6, 7 and 8 were my favorite and really made me think. There’s things to pray about there! Blood and water imagery always speaks to me. The imagery of blindness was cool:
“sometimes the Lord is acting so much in our lives that we can’t seem to see anything at all. We are blinded and overwhelmed by His rays. With our heads down…we think we are in total darkness—but in fact, He is all around us.”
I recommend this book to people to read in Holy Hour cause it’s pretty short. I read a chapter before bed, it’s not very long.
The Eastern Catholic theology is stunningly beautiful and the author does such a good job making the book accessible to us Latins but still feels Eastern. The icons are gorgeous! I believe she made them herself!! I really enjoyed the icons. She also adds short poems before the chapters which was fun.
I enjoyed this book. I think I’ll read it before bed again in a year or two. If you wanna borrow it lmk!
December 15, 2024
Such beautiful stories from a holy woman who is way more relatable than you’d think for a cloistered nun. Each chapter has an icon and a poem with it!
September 5, 2023
A really sweet book. The author is an Eastern Catholic nun and I’m a Reformed Presbyterian so there were moments that werent my vibe but overall this was a devotional that taught and reminded me of the Fathers delight and love over his people.
“Why can I not see the face of my Father? Is He hiding? Is He stern or aloof? Why can’t His own children see Him? As I asked these questions in my heart, I began to understand that it is for our own sake that He shields us from such a gaze; in our fallen state, we cannot endure such pure love. It is beyond all our understanding, indescribably greater than all the extremes of love that we can recognize with our limited human comprehension.
It is a look of love so beyond all perfection that, if we looked upon it, it would literally kill us. When we read about an angel appearing to someone in the Scriptures, most of the time the reaction is the same: the person falls flat on his face with fear. How much greater would that fear be if we could see the Father in all His splendor? There are some things we are not yet prepared to see.
And yet, as I continued to gaze at the crucifix, I wondered. Has He not given us a glimpse of His gaze? Have we not seen a glimpse of His face through the Son? Jesus said to Philip, “He who has seen me has seen the Father” (John 14:9). Then it hit me like a flash of lightning. The more we grow in our face-to-face encounter with Jesus — who took on human nature for our sake — the more confident we become in the Father’s love for us.”
“Why can I not see the face of my Father? Is He hiding? Is He stern or aloof? Why can’t His own children see Him? As I asked these questions in my heart, I began to understand that it is for our own sake that He shields us from such a gaze; in our fallen state, we cannot endure such pure love. It is beyond all our understanding, indescribably greater than all the extremes of love that we can recognize with our limited human comprehension.
It is a look of love so beyond all perfection that, if we looked upon it, it would literally kill us. When we read about an angel appearing to someone in the Scriptures, most of the time the reaction is the same: the person falls flat on his face with fear. How much greater would that fear be if we could see the Father in all His splendor? There are some things we are not yet prepared to see.
And yet, as I continued to gaze at the crucifix, I wondered. Has He not given us a glimpse of His gaze? Have we not seen a glimpse of His face through the Son? Jesus said to Philip, “He who has seen me has seen the Father” (John 14:9). Then it hit me like a flash of lightning. The more we grow in our face-to-face encounter with Jesus — who took on human nature for our sake — the more confident we become in the Father’s love for us.”
June 25, 2025
I read this slowly because it’s so thought provoking and beautiful. Mother Iliana is a wonderful storyteller and it’s obvious she has a deep faith and prayer life. I really enjoyed her insights and fresh perspective on often heard scripture passages and truths of the faith. Highly recommend, especially those who struggle with self-worth or seeing/feeling God’s presence in your life.
February 15, 2024
I thoroughly enjoyed this book. It is so simple that you could devour it very quickly and yet so deep that it is worth the time of sitting with it and pondering the different sections and allowing the truths of which Mother Iliana speaks to sink in.
What I appreciate most about this book is the fact that the focus is not to teach me something intellectually. Instead, the book is extremely experiential. It is the fruit of prayer. It is Mother Iliana's testimony of how God worked in her life and brought her to understand that she is delighted in by God the Father.
The fact that it is so experiential was the highlight for me. We each have our own unique relationship with the Lord and our own wounds. There will never be a universal path that will take us on this journey. However, seeing the author's journey and understanding her experience, and how the Lord spoke to her, can enlighten our own journey. It provides insight into how the Lord could or may be speaking to and working in us.
While the content of the book is so beautiful (the earlier chapters being my favorite), what struck me the most was how Mother Iliana discovered the Lord in the ordinary. Whether it was walking in the orchard or seeing a baby or reading scripture, each experience she had in daily life was an opportunity to discover God's presence and love. Even if the content itself was not what I needed, receiving the testimony of this Eastern Catholic Nun and how she lives her relationship with the Lord fed my soul. Sometimes we reduce the spiritual life to a series of vocal prayers we learned in Sunday School. Through this book, we see that it is so much more. That alone makes this book worth the read.
What I appreciate most about this book is the fact that the focus is not to teach me something intellectually. Instead, the book is extremely experiential. It is the fruit of prayer. It is Mother Iliana's testimony of how God worked in her life and brought her to understand that she is delighted in by God the Father.
The fact that it is so experiential was the highlight for me. We each have our own unique relationship with the Lord and our own wounds. There will never be a universal path that will take us on this journey. However, seeing the author's journey and understanding her experience, and how the Lord spoke to her, can enlighten our own journey. It provides insight into how the Lord could or may be speaking to and working in us.
While the content of the book is so beautiful (the earlier chapters being my favorite), what struck me the most was how Mother Iliana discovered the Lord in the ordinary. Whether it was walking in the orchard or seeing a baby or reading scripture, each experience she had in daily life was an opportunity to discover God's presence and love. Even if the content itself was not what I needed, receiving the testimony of this Eastern Catholic Nun and how she lives her relationship with the Lord fed my soul. Sometimes we reduce the spiritual life to a series of vocal prayers we learned in Sunday School. Through this book, we see that it is so much more. That alone makes this book worth the read.
January 8, 2024
God loves each of us uniquely, individually, and intimately. It’s easy to fall into the trap of self loathing under the guise of humility. This book is a lovely little reminder that it is sinful to fall into the vice of such prideful false meekness, but He is always waiting to shower us with His love. It is always good to be reminded of the warm and joyful delight God has for his children.
August 10, 2023
Gem of a book
This book shines like a sapphire. The prose is both elegant and profound. The author has a talent for expressing God’s love in a most magnificent way. This work truly is a spiritual gem.
This book shines like a sapphire. The prose is both elegant and profound. The author has a talent for expressing God’s love in a most magnificent way. This work truly is a spiritual gem.
March 21, 2024
I loved hearing Mother Iliana speak on several podcasts, so I was disappointed I didn't love the book as much as I hoped. It felt repetitive and melodramatic to me in some places. There were some beautiful passages though and things to take to heart, so still a worthwhile read.
August 23, 2023
This book is a spiritual gem! I will definitely reread.
September 5, 2023
This is a fantastic book of looking interiorly to your heart, and how the Father desires nothing but to love you and your love.
January 29, 2024
Beautiful and healing. The gospel shines in these pages of this woman’s life with Christ. I’ll definitely come back to this one.
February 23, 2024
This book was an incredible read for anyone trying to accept God’s love for them. Mother Iliana is extremely validating but offers support on how to accept the love we’ve already been given by Him. ✨
June 30, 2025
a beautiful collection of the way a simple loving nun has traveled to a deeper knowledge of herself through the lens of our Father. I would recommend.
August 11, 2025
Cannot recommend this book high enough!! Especially for melancholy temperaments who deal with scrupulosity, and self-esteem problems.
September 11, 2023
Beautiful little devotional. Normally I’m pridefully allergic to simplistic and “intimate” devotionals like this, but probably because of my biases — it is Eastern and not Latin, and I found out about it from a favorite podcast, What God is Not — it broke through and gave me lots to contemplate.
I love how practical it is. Mother Iliana of course does not say “Do X Y Z for instant healing!” but rather shares many anecdotes to take us along her journey in total honesty. I relate to a whole lot of her frustrated, logical cynic prayers in response to God’s words. “Yeah, Scripture says X. But I am clearly not X…” and such. Mother Iliana then shares what God then reveals to her after and through her pained responses and through her sufferings (especially serious sicknesses).
The devotional flavor can be “intense” at times, while still remaining plain. Like I said, it is very simple (and intentionally so, according to Mother Iliana) but it’s not in a way that seems forced or patronizing. It is a genuine expression in line with the devotional flavor towards childlikeness and humility.
All the iconography in the book (which she wrote too) is beautiful.
—
“I could see now how often I had been afraid to ‘waste’ my love because I thought it would not be received. Or, worse yet, I feared giving my love to those who didn’t ‘deserve’ it. But I was seeing more clearly than ever that I was most called to pour out my love out over the seemingly ‘undeserving’, and that my love would never be wasted. I did not need to worry about controlling the outcomes of this pouring out; they were not my concern. All I had to do was unite my outpourings to Him who would use them in any way that He wished.” p. 107
I love how practical it is. Mother Iliana of course does not say “Do X Y Z for instant healing!” but rather shares many anecdotes to take us along her journey in total honesty. I relate to a whole lot of her frustrated, logical cynic prayers in response to God’s words. “Yeah, Scripture says X. But I am clearly not X…” and such. Mother Iliana then shares what God then reveals to her after and through her pained responses and through her sufferings (especially serious sicknesses).
The devotional flavor can be “intense” at times, while still remaining plain. Like I said, it is very simple (and intentionally so, according to Mother Iliana) but it’s not in a way that seems forced or patronizing. It is a genuine expression in line with the devotional flavor towards childlikeness and humility.
All the iconography in the book (which she wrote too) is beautiful.
—
“I could see now how often I had been afraid to ‘waste’ my love because I thought it would not be received. Or, worse yet, I feared giving my love to those who didn’t ‘deserve’ it. But I was seeing more clearly than ever that I was most called to pour out my love out over the seemingly ‘undeserving’, and that my love would never be wasted. I did not need to worry about controlling the outcomes of this pouring out; they were not my concern. All I had to do was unite my outpourings to Him who would use them in any way that He wished.” p. 107
October 23, 2024
A pleasant little book with touching stories, verses, and really invites you to take a look at your own life and see the Father's love for you!
Displaying 1 - 16 of 16 reviews